The Confessionals - 903: Warring Kingdoms

Episode Date: October 6, 2026

What does it look like when God calls you to something before you fully understand what you’re being called into? Tony looks back at the path that led him to start The Confessionals. At first, he thought he was simply following a call to podcast. Over time, the stories he heard began to collide with experiences of his own. The deeper he went, the harder it became to dismiss what was happening. Strange encounters became personal. Spiritual warfare became real. What once felt like curiosity began to look like preparation. That journey ultimately forced Tony to confront a much bigger question about the world around us and the forces operating within it. Those conclusions became the foundation for The Confessionals: Exposing Warring Kingdoms.If you’re able, consider helping the Merkel family with medical expenses by donating to Lindsay’s GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/b8f76890📕 Pre-order Tony's Book: https://a.co/d/0bJS3SaV🎥 Tony Merkel YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@tony.merkel📰 Subscribe to Our Newsletter: https://www.theconfessionalspodcast.com/newsletterBecome a member for ad-free listening, extra shows, and exclusive access to our social media app: theconfessionalspodcast.com/joinThe Confessionals Social Network App:Apple Store: https://apple.co/3UxhPrhGoogle Play: https://bit.ly/43mk8kZThe Counter Series Available NOW:The Counter (YouTube): WATCH HEREThe Counter (Full Episode): WATCH HERETony's Recommended Reads: slingshotlibrary.comIf you want to learn about Jesus and what it means to be saved: Click HereMerkel Media Apparel: merkmerch.comSPONSORSGHOSTBED: GhostBed.com/tonyQUINCE: quince.com/tonyIVERMECTIN: twc.health/tonyVENICE AI: https://venice.ai/theconfessionalsRUMBLE WALLET: https://rumblewallet.onelink.me/bJsX/ConfessionalsCONNECT WITH USWebsite: www.theconfessionalspodcast.comEmail: [e-mail] ADDRESS:Merkel Media6726 Morganton RdP.O. Box #08Greenback, TN 37742SOCIAL MEDIASubscribe to our YouTube: https://bit.ly/2TlREaIReddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/theconfessionals/Discord: https://discord.gg/KDn4D2uw7hShow Instagram: theconfessionalspodcastTony's Instagram: tonymerkelofficialFacebook: www.facebook.com/TheConfessionalsPodcasTwitter: @TConfessionalsTony's Twitter: @tony_merkelProduced by: @jyorkofficialOUTRO MUSICTony Merkel - Down The Rabbit HoleAvailable on Spotify

Hey, everyone, before we get to this week's show, this is just your weekly reminder to please continue to pray for my wife, Lindsay. She is battling breast cancer right now, and we're praying for complete healing in Jesus' name. Thank you. Merkel. Media. This was all circulating around the base that a giant had to kill, but no one was supposed to talk about it. I saw three long, bony fingers, reach up underneath the door, curl up to grab it, and then disappear.

When he came over to me, dude, he slithered over to me. And he starts running and firing at this giant. Well, the giant moves. He's got a spear in one hand, and he's running really fast. And spears Dan holds him up like this. Somebody else, shoot him in the face, shoot him in the face. They basically decapitate him. Got places, got closer, got closer, got fire.

when he got about 15 yards away from me, I raised that 12 days and I blow this head off. I feel something pulling at my leg, and I look over and there are two small. Literally, I'm getting pulled off the bed. I reached my hand into this bush, and I touch air.

Couldn't breathe, and I couldn't move, because I know I'm seeing a monster. Welcome to the show, everybody you're listening to the Confessionals podcast. I'm your host Tony Merkel. Thanks for being here. If you got a story and an experience, you'd like to share with me on the show, go ahead and shoot me an email. My email address is contact at the confessionalspodcast.com. That's contact at the confessionalspodcast.com.

Or go to the website, the confessionalspodcast.com, hit the contact section and you can reach me that way as well. Other words for me, just get a hold of me. If you want more shows on a weekly basis, we have you covered, become a member to the confessionalspodcast.com and get access to all the extra shows every Thursday. We release them. And you'll have access to all the archive as well. so hundreds of episodes you've never heard before waiting for you when you become a member. So go ahead and do it today, the professionals podcast.com slash join. Also check out Merkmerch.com for all your Merkel Media apparel needs. We have you covered. We have t-shirts, hoodies, hats are being restocked.

We have tote bags, coffee, mugs, a lot of stuff there at Merckmerch.com and a lot of cool stuff coming very soon. Go ahead and check it out today if you so choose. Also, friends, just last but not least, I want to let you know that I started a Tony Merkel YouTube channel where I'm actually uploading the archive of my past sermons that I've preached. It hasn't been a ton, but I have preached different sermons, and I wanted it a landing spot for those. So the Tony Merkel YouTube channel, which is in the description of this episode, you can go ahead and watch the sermon, subscribe, like, share, whatever you'd like to do. But I just want to let you guys know I did start another YouTube channel for my own ministry that I have going

on outside of the show with me preaching and things like that. So if you have been interested, interested in that development of my life. Go ahead and check it out today. The YouTube channel, Tony Merkel, link in the description below. All right, friends, listen, we have a different show today. Speaking of Tony Merkel, we have Tony Merkel as a guest today because today is launch day. It's the first day that my book, The Confessionals, Exposing War and Kingdoms, is available for purchase on Amazon. Thank you very much for everybody who has been pre-ordering the book. But now, if you have been waiting, now is your chance. You can go to Amazon right now. link in the description of this episode and hit purchase. And the order goes in and you'll get it

within a few days, I imagine, right from Amazon. So go ahead and check it out. But today's conversation is all about the book, what went into the book and why I wrote the book and how this book kind of came together, all the supernatural things that I've experienced in my personal life, but also through the show that led me into writing this book. It's all covered on today's show. So without further delay, this awkward intro will end with me saying, let's get to Tony right now. Welcome to the show, everybody. We've got a different show for you today, a little bit of a different episode. And this isn't the right Merkel that you're looking at right now. And the right Merkel that you're hearing, sorry, this is the younger brother of the main guy, Tony Merkel,

who's still at the table with us. But we're going to be discussing a little bit of Tony's history in his book today, but also going into some fun stuff that, you know, as guys we tend to get into. But we also at the table have Derek. So, Derek, what's up? What's up? Welcome to the show, Tony. Thank you for having me. Tony.

Yes. The audience needs to understand that this took us about 30 minutes to actually get going because they're like, I don't know how I do this. And so here we are on my show being a guest. Yes. Thanks for having me. You're welcome. What a pleasure it is.

My goodness. The time it took to get you here. Yes. It was hard. Right. Those are all the same things we talk about every time. The show opens. Oh, my goodness.

But now, yeah, we just got a good episode for you today. And we want to get into the book a little bit, Tony. So I know you've been thinking about it. Obviously, it took you a little while to write. But, you know. Took me a long while. Yeah. Took me a long while.

It's something that, you know, I think over the years, people had asked me to do a book. And I don't know why. Because nobody would ever give context to that. They would just say, you should do a book. I'm like, oh, I'm what? what am I like what do I have to say you know and um especially in you know early years to midway through the show to recent you know maybe the last maybe the first seven years maybe eight years of the show I was like why would I write a book because there's nothing to discuss you know I talk

to the people I don't go to the people and tell them about my expertise or my experiences they're talking to me and um I would say over the last a couple years two three years there has been a shift in my heart and my mind. And the more I started connecting dots and starting to see things differently, according to what I even do with the show, the more I started feeling like, I think I might have something to say. And now, I mean, not to jump too far ahead,

but I think I got a couple of books in me. It's kind of crazy. But like this book, I didn't even know how to start it out. I mean, I just, it was, I didn't, I didn't know exactly what it was going to be, you know. It's not a memoir in your traditional sense of like my life. It's like a very strategic path of my life that I'm talking about. And when I started out, my goal was to paint the reality of the supernatural world. That was my goal. Yeah. And I didn't know how to do that. And the more I started brainstorming, writing, I did. down and just spending a lot of time considering what this was going to look like, the more I started

finding myself years and years and years back. And I started thinking about my childhood. And writing this book was like a discovery journey for me, things that I hadn't considered in the timeline of events and how much they really actually affect me, you know? And I, when I like when we were growing up and stuff jack i mean i say we like we 10 years apart 10 years apart but i mean when i when i moved to that trailer park uh i think i was five and it turns i turned six a little later from that i don't remember when we moved in the trailer park but i believe i was five and um it was you know it's like we talked about liminal spaces on the show entering into spaces that exist that are void of the energy that they're supposed to have. It's like in the time capsule

of my mind, going back to that trailer park is like a, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a liminal space now. And there's all this action and events and periods of time where it's building you into a person for 10 years. I think it was like 10 years. And maybe not too much. maybe not 10 years. I don't remember, but it was a big chunk of my childhood. And now when I go back into the archives of my mind, it's like this liminal space that I enter into that I recognize. And it had this energy weighing over me my entire life.

And that energy was a negative energy that propelled me into becoming a man that I was not meant to be. And I feel like going. back into those thoughts and memories. Maybe the reason why it's a liminal space is because I'm not the man that those memories created. Yeah. You know? Yeah.

And now it's like, it's an empty storage room. You know? And I'm like, I have the memories and they're there. And I know what happened here. But what happened here doesn't have the weight that it once did on my life. Yeah. because it's, I've been transformed into the actual creation that was supposed to be.

Yeah, was you think that's more of like a like a supernatural like reflection? You're like you're, where you're at now, you could look back and then see it under a whole new scope and understand that like everything you went through, you can actually put some credence and some power behind and understand that like it was very intentional,

everything that you had gone through to get to the point where you are. Yeah, totally. I mean, so I think that I've come to the, conclusion recently that God, God redeems all things for his glory. And I don't think that God put me through these situations as a kid growing up into my early adult life because he wanted me to get here today. And I had to learn certain things so that I could get here. I think that life, all in creation, put me, Tony Merkel in a situation growing up that snowballed into other areas of my life. And though it wasn't the original intent for my life that God created it to be,

he redeems all things. And so while I don't know what my life would have looked like if I didn't go to that trailer park when I was five years old, I know that if you submit your life to Christ and you live for him 100% fully, he's going to circle you back around to his original intent, whether you straight or not or not off that path. And that's kind of how I look at it. It's just like the trailer park, childhood, it's like I don't believe that the things I went through was what God wanted me to go through.

I don't. But I think that God redeems all things when you allow him to. And I think that's what happened. And I learned that when I was writing the second chapter about my grandfather. Yeah. Like, you know, the first chapter is me talking about the environment that I was in.

And like the idea of cryptids has been in my life for like forever, apparently. The more I looked, the more I looked into this book and the more I was thinking about the things and writing, the more I realized how much. I remember the one time I was, there was a snow day and we were building like snow forts. It was like one of those massive storms in the 90s, maybe the blizzard of 93 or 96, whatever it was. I just remember there's a lot of snow, and we were behind one of the trailers building. It was like tunnel systems through snow, you know, and very dangerous for a kid who was always beat up to be hanging out on tunnel systems through snow and ice. We all know where that went. I was in pain, and it wasn't from slipping by accident, you know.

But I remember that when I was leaving, because it got out of hand and I had to just leave before it got too much crazier. I don't know what spawned this and it just makes me wonder if me talking about cryptids was something that I was known for as a kid and I just don't remember because I was walking away away from the giant snow pile and I remember the kids who were picking on me screamed there's a werewolf, there's a werewolf

and I was like ah! And I run, you know, and like I was terrible. terrified. And, you know, that's not even in the book, but I, I, I, um, I just remember thinking about that and I'm wondering, why, why did they say that, you know? It was something that I was known for, you know, thinking and talking about these kind of things. And then as life goes on, you know, you go different paths and I found my way back to it, right? Um, but there's all these things in the childhood, but when I was looking back at the, the, the, my grandfather, um, you know, let me just go back one more time here to the trailer park,

and I might revisit it later, but that experience with the UFO that night with my mom, it, I think it did something to me. Because if I had all this childlike fascinations with cryptids and the mysterious, which I know I did, the idea, the topic, the word mysterious, was something that I always was gravitating towards. loved it.

But when I saw those lights, well, the one light in the sky that turned into four and then came back together into one, I think it did something in me that they almost unlocked something. And today I talk about, you know, the idea of the curiosity and interest and attention we put into these topics can be the lure for more activity in your life. because you're putting your heart's desires into it. It's like it's like it can be a level of conjuring if you're not doing it under the proper umbrella of protection. And when you see that in the sky and everything that you fantasize about becomes a reality,

the fears that you thought you would have in that moment, like weirdly left me because I found myself chasing after it. Mom yelling up the road to me, Tony, get back here. Like, like, I distinctly remember that. She remembers that. And it, like, kind of marked me, and maybe it, like, advanced my curiosity more. But there's the counterbalance to it. And it's the, it's like, okay, what was that, you know? And you could think you're crazy with a lot of this stuff. Growing up, you're like, I didn't see that. And I know that for a fact, because we had dad on the show not too long ago, and he felt that way. When we talked to him about the UFOs and stuff that he saw,

he was like, did I imagine that? He had to check his brother. And I remember standing in the driveway at our aunt's house when he, it was nighttime, it was dark out. I was standing at the end of the driveway, gravel driveway, and I remember him saying to my uncle, do you remember when we were kids and him confirming, yes, I remember that? You know?

But like, I understand that. I can sympathize with that because you wonder, you're like, man, did I really experience that? Thank God my mom was there for most of the situation. But like, there's that side of it. But then it's like, okay, so what else is there? Right? The big old what else?

What if, you know? And growing up with Pappy, it was like, there was no question, according to my grandfather's faith, what and who God was and how active was he in life today. That faith was a crutch of mine for most of my life. But our grandfather sharing these stories growing up, like, I wish I could remember them all. Yeah. There's just so much. Yeah.

And I always come back to the one, like, and maybe it's because of how major it was in the sense of protection, like, supernatural protection. With the idea that, you know, he's. He's an evangelist and he goes to these towns and, you know, preaches when he's asked to preach, to have the boldness to go to a place that you've been told not to go and still do what you were told not to do, knowing there's going to be repercussions for it under threat. And then to see the threat come to your front door, essentially. You know, they go and they preach and they have that tent revival.

And they took the threats serious enough that they stayed up waiting for the payback. And sure enough, these guys show up. And, like, putting myself in his shoes, like, the amount of confusion he must have had when they show up. And there's only a few of them. and then these guys just leave. And then they come back with more. And now you're like, okay. Yeah, things are getting out again.

There's three of us. Apparently there's three in the car. They brought more. We're in trouble. And then they leave. And they come back with more. And it's like, what is going on here? You know, like why?

I think I even remember him saying something like, we were thinking, what are these clowns going to do? Are they going to make their move or not? You know, have you used to call people clowns. are this clowns going to do? And then they never did anything. And I try to think about like, what was it like in that moment? And it was probably confusion, you know? Maybe he, maybe he had the presence of mind to say, I don't know what that was about, but thank God he protected us. But maybe he just was confused. And it's just like,

what was that? You know, like you kind of go through situations in life sometimes where you're expecting an outcome and it seems imminent and then it just doesn't happen. You're just like, I have nothing to explain that with. I don't know why it didn't happen the way it's supposed to happen. Yeah. I mean, encountering the supernatural does that. It's not something that's easily explained.

And I think that's kind of the, you know, what we see throughout scripture is it's laden with unexplainable supernatural, you know, occurrences. Or if you're in the moment, you know, you know, you may not actually know how to handle it or how to even recognize what's going on. You know, for him, that was the case more than likely until he heard the stories of what actually happened and what was surrounding the camp. Yeah, I mean, those angels. So, I mean, he goes into town the next day, him and other people, and they find out the whole town's talking about how there's angels standing guard over their camp. They didn't see.

And you hear him talk about these stories growing up. legs growing. My dad, again, was here in studio saying he remembers being there and seeing it. And so you hear these stories growing up, and it kind of gives you the opposite of the fear side of it. Like the idea, you know, back in the 90s, UFOs are aliens and they're scary and hopefully they never come after me and all that stuff. And then you have the opposite side of the supernatural where it's like you have a grandfather who's experienced extreme things under the divine umbrella of God and his protection. And it just fills you with this like all of wonder, just of wonder.

And maybe that's what a propelling thing has been for the confessionals all these years. It's just this like this out loud wondering through people's experiences. What is possible? How is this possible? Why is this possible? And then this like out loud coming to a realization that everything I thought was that was impossible is that actually real, you know? And I understand what that sounds like to the world. I understand what that sounds like to people who maybe aren't followers of the show. I understand what it sounds like to people

who aren't following God or even in the occult. People who are just maybe atheistic. It's bizarre. It's crazy. I'm the crazy guy. I know. I know. I'm crazy. But not that crazy. I've just, I've been exposed to so much supernatural through people's testimonies and then my own experiences that it's undeniable for me that we are living in existence that goes well beyond our ability to articulate with words. I don't think I've ever come across anybody who can articulate what's happening accurately. And I don't think we ever will because of the infinite nature of God. So you have this childhood that I have, which is just riddled with violence and supernatural wonder, traveling through the woods at all times of the day, it's something in you is pulling.

You can feel it. Like, you can feel it. Every time I went into the woods, I could feel it. Every time I sat outside in the woods wondering about the mysteries of all this, you could feel the pull. And then you have your grandfather telling you these things and you feel the pole. And I was, when I was writing this book, I was straight stuck right there. Yeah. I was stuck.

Like chapter number two, that's all we got. This is more like an e-book or a manual, you know? That's it. And I put it down for a couple weeks. and and I was like really like I was lost. I was like the publishing company wants me to write a book. I told them I would. I signed a contract.

I need to get them a book, but I don't know how to go about this. And there was an unlocking moment about two weeks later. And I remember I was actually sitting down in Lindsay's office at the house trying to write this and still stuck. mom text me and said that your Ann Ellen wants to talk to you. And I was like, why does Ann Ellen want to talk to me? You know, like, I don't talk to like much of my family at all.

And okay. So I guess I called her and I was talking to her out at the chicken coop. I was going to say, I think you didn't you still have pigs when you talked to her? I think I might have had pigs still. Yeah, you might have still had pigs. Yeah. And I don't remember, but I do remember. standing out in the dark at the chicken coop and standing around walking in chicken poop

on the phone with her. And she said to me, she opens up the conversation lightly, and then she said that she had a sleep paralysis experience a couple weeks prior to that. And I was assuming that that's what she wanted to talk to me about. And, you know, she tells me what happens. This entity comes in the room. She's completely paralyzed, like this missing. comes in the room with the entity. She can't move. And she, it's standing there. And if I remember

correctly, she is rebuking in the name of Jesus and eventually it goes away. And I was like, well, I remember telling it, well, that's what I told you to do. Good job. Like, I was like, I don't know what we're doing here. Yeah. But, you know, maybe, you know, like, maybe I'm the only person, which is the case for a lot of people you find doing the show. Like, the reason why they talk to you is because there's nobody else to talk to, you know? And maybe that's the case with her. and then she shifted gears right in the beginning of the conversation after that. And she says to me that I remember her saying, you know, when my dad died. And that's when it was shifting the conversation.

And she starts explaining to me who her dad was, my grandfather that I was just talking about. And she starts laying out all this stuff, this history of her dad and, you know, different things, how God used him. and she goes, when he died, he left a mantle behind. And I'm like, okay. And she goes, I feel like God's telling me, or no, she said, God is telling me to tell you, it's time for you to pick up that mantle. Yeah. And she has, you know, spiritual giftings put that way, that she, she learned.

and discovered throughout her adult life. And she has come to the understanding that when God is revealing to her a message for somebody, it's not for her to hold on to. She needs to tell the person, and that's what she told me. She said, so I'm telling you what God's telling me. And it was timely because I told her, I was like, I'm stuck on chapter two. And I don't know how to write this chapter about him. And she spent a couple hours with me talking about her dad then.

Yeah. And I, it was late at night. I go to bed and I wake up the next morning, a little confused because at this point in my life, like as I'm writing the book, I don't have, like, I know the company's name Merkle Media. And I know there's Merkel in things, but there has always been this underlying thing in my life where I don't feel there wasn't a sense of pride in it because it's like I didn't have that sense of belonging, you know, being adopted into it, you know. And this book has been like a journey for me to of this like process of discovery of who I am,

you know, in certain areas. Yeah. And this is a big one, a really big one because I, I was like, I was very confused the next morning as to why God has told my aunt, apparently, that I'm the one to pick up the mantle. because I'm like, I'm sitting at a table with one of Jack Walter Merkel's grandchildren who's named Jack, you know, like, why me when he has like 17 grandkids, one's named after him, you know? Who was that?

Two. Two. Jackie. Oh, yeah, Jackie, too, yeah. Oh, yeah. So, like, it's like, why, why me, right? And I don't, I don't. I don't think I really actually have that answer.

And just as I say that, I can almost hear Pappy's voice say, don't ask that question. You know, just like some things are left to be left alone, you know? But I got a revelation the next morning with my wife that carried the rest of this book and carried me over the last couple of years, however long it's been since I wrote this chapter.

Because I'm telling her what the conversation was. And she asked me a question that I didn't see coming. And it was a simple question. She just said, what does the name mean? What is the last name mean, Merkel? And I told her it meant merchant. And it's a stupid last name, you know? And because that's what I thought.

I thought it's a ridiculous last name, merchant, and I have no pride in it because I'm not blood. And that's just how I felt. And she looks it up and she, I remember her saying, I'm not fine merchant anywhere. And she goes, but it's like something like the root word that comes from, that Merkel comes from means guardian of the frontier. And when she said that, like I'm standing in the kitchen and it was just like,

you know how like I described that moment where I'm sitting in the funeral and like the room gets sucked out and like it's just me and God? Yeah. It was kind of like that. It was just like all of a sudden like everything just stopped around me. and like this alignment happened. And I was just like, holy crap. Like, guarding the frontier.

Like, I had just started like getting this feeling and accepting this feeling of like a watchman, you know, which like this year I've really been vocal about it in beginning of 2026. Like I think our first episode, we talked about this idea of watchmen. But like this was like the beginning, like before that it was like the beginning of stages of this where I was like, I didn't have words for it.

You know, like, I just, I just had this feeling that God has been gearing me up in a weird way to do something along the lines that I didn't have words for. And then all of a sudden, Lindsay says, guarding the frontier. And it was just like, that's it. Yeah. I think it's kind of funny, like the parallels that you're saying right now. So you're talking about how, you know, what the last name means. And the title of the book is exposing war in kingdoms.

So, like, you're talking about being a war. like learning that you are named a warrior. You know, you're not just, you know, a merchant. You're not just, you know, somebody who's selling something. You are a warrior. A named warrior. You're ready to fight. And also, like you're saying this is a discovery journey throughout the entire thing.

But I think you're also, there's the parallels here just wild to me because the podcast itself has been a discovery journey. It's been a journey from the time of just, you know, not even knowing how this, the direction of the show was going to go, but finding new things that tie in in the deeper depths of what's actually to come. You know, it led you from the point of somebody who, you know, even before you started the podcast, somebody who had been, you know, tampered with, with what God had decided, what he desired for your life, you know, that journey of discovery throughout those 10 years before you started in your adulthood before you started the podcast to now.

It's just, it's mind-blowing to me to see the parallels of just how that all played out because this whole time, it is a discovery journey. And I think you've discovered something deeper when it comes to not just what the show is, but who you are. All right, let's take a second talk about our sponsor today, which is Quince. You know those pieces in your closet that you find yourself wearing on repeat over and over and over again. The sweaters that go with everything, the perfect pair of pants, or even a t-shirt, reaching for first. Those are the pieces that make dressing way easy, and that's what Quince does best. Quince focuses on the high-quality wardrobe staples made with premium materials like 100% Mongolian cashmere and organic cotton. The styles are timeless, versatile, and designed to become a

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and you can check those boxes too. Find your next fall outfits at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks you where you heard about them, let them know it was the confessionals. It's just the best way to support the show. Now let's get back to the show right now. Yeah, I mean, like, I'm just taken back to that story with you as a kid in the UFO. And I know you made like a little AI intro to it and stuff, but like, you know, he's like, Tony, come back. Yeah.

And like, I just felt like, you know, it's like boy chasing wonder. Hmm. And that's really like, like, that's who you are. That's what you've been this whole time is just a boy chasing the wonder. And it's cool because it ties in so beautifully with your name and like, and like, you're, and like, how God has orchestrated all of this. And so, like, the next step of all this is, is Bigfoot. Of course, naturally, right?

I'm saying it's from UFOs to Bigfoot. Yeah, I mean, it's just a natural progression. Yeah, let me, let me, let me just say this, though, because the whole last name thing holds so much weight. And I believe that it had a big part as to who I've been developing into over the last year or so since I figured it out. It's given me almost like this like, you remember the cartoons and they would, like, Looney Tunes and some of the characters sometimes would have the Warner Brothers stamp on them. you know like it's like I got the Merkel stamp on me and for the first time of my life like I saw oh I actually am part of this tribe and and God brought me through so much to the point of grafting me

into this family line and it wasn't because I needed somewhere to belong but it's because he created me to be in this family line to begin with and and for whatever reason I don't know we could, you know, speculate forever as to why he did it the way he did it. But there are five last names that have been a tied to me throughout my life. One, I never actually took, well, two actually, I never, no, three. Let me just say this way. My mom, her maiden last name, she didn't want to give me when I was born because she hadn't talked to her father.

so I could have been an Ollinger. So she didn't want to give me my biological father's last name, which was Diaz. So she gave me my great-grandmother's maiden name, which was Frickert, F-R-I-C-K-E-R-T. What a name. I know.

Anthony Frickert. And you wondered why you got beat up. Yeah, I know. Thanks, Derek. And so I carried that for a chunk of my life. But before she married our dad with the last name, Merkel, she was engaged to another man. And I could have taken on his last name, that would have went through.

And he turned into a significant abuser. And so I dodged a bullet when that whole thing broke off because he actually confessed to my grandparents that if they would have got married, I would have been the first one to go. And that was right before they took him to jail. Wow. Yeah. So there's been a battle on my identity my entire life up until recent years. And I think part of this whole thing is people, or the last several years, have been experiencing me stepping into my identity, you know, which is you've always known me as Tony Merkel, but I never knew myself as Tony Merkel.

And now I have stepped into and embraced what a Merkle is. And I'm trying to walk that out in a way that is bold, fearless, and points people to the only place that I feel comfortable pointing to, which is Jesus Christ. I feel like spiritually we at this table, not just Merckles, but Helensia, I feel like we are guardians of the frontier. And I feel like we are watchmen, and we are, for whatever reason, placed here by God to identify very weird things about the enemy and our reality and scream as loud as we can to people who are already listening because they know it to be true where safety is. There are so many people who experience things that they don't know how to define. There are people who experience things because they conjure it up and they know how they got there, but they don't know how to get it. undone. They don't know where safety is. They don't, listen, man, like,

there are so many people who stepped into it. They did it willingly, and they wish they could undo it, and they don't know how, and they can't imagine the power that is, that's keeping them enslaved, the power that's oppressing them,

that there's a greater power that can free them in an instant. Because it's been such a process for them to get to this point of slavery. They can't imagine something that free them in a moment. It's just a split second. And so like we're here trying to shine the light on the path of that freedom. And, um, and I just think that I could have easily called this show the Merkel confession or so, I don't know. I don't know. Like, I just feel like, like, my last name Merkel, the, the base and the foundation of it and how is, is all,

how we're here at the table, how the audience is here watching and listening. It is the cornerstone of my life. And I didn't know it until I started trying to write this book. And it's just been, I know we're just, we're talking about Chapter 2 right now, but like, I'm just saying like, it's really powerful. I can't express to people how, how much Chapter 2 changed my life, writing it, changed my life. And it probably changed the trajectory of even the book.

It laid the foundation of how this book was going to be laid out. So, yeah, that's the first two chapters. How long has that been? I'm sorry, guys. No, you're good. You said you like people that step into it. And I feel like that kind of depicts a portion of you starting this podcast, how you kind of just jumped in and maybe like fearlessly went into the first

frontier, not knowing where you were stepping or what you were stepping into. Do you want to go into some of those early portions of the show? Because honestly, you don't really talk much about the episodes. This is really like a personal journey for you and like pivotal points. But, you know, what are these maybe stepped in moments that you talk about that you yourself had had to experience? Well, I think part of it. it is stepping into territory that was so uncomfortable, you felt like you were doing something

wrong. In the early days of the show, and I've been pretty vocal about this. I mean, God called me to be a podcaster. I understand it doesn't, you don't have to be called to be a podcaster in order to be a podcaster, but that's just how it worked for me. And that's also the only instruction that I got from God that I was going to do this. And so, how do you define? How do you? this though. Right. Exactly. Exactly. It wouldn't have made sense. And so like as I go through this process, there's been repeated times where I feel like I stepped into it and I'm messed up and I'm dishonoring God. And I do believe hindsight looking back every time I stepped into something and I feel like I shouldn't have opened that box. Part of God was just looking at me with that Jack Nicholson

face. Just like, yes. It's like, yeah. It's like, Because, like, I feel like God knew, no matter how I went about this show, he was going to reroute it and redeem it to the landing spot that he wanted it in. So I feel like God was just like, just keep stepping. That's all I need you to do. You don't need to be perfect at it. I just need it to keep walking. Yeah. You know, and if you keep walking, I promise you, the landing spot's going to be a good one.

And so with the early days of the show, to answer your question, though, um, There were plenty of shows that felt like they were just a fun conversation. I remember the one that, and I don't remember all the details, but it was early in the show, and I want to say it was episode 14, and I think I called it the tree sprite. When I talked to this lady, and it was like probably two and a half, three hour conversation, And mind you, I was very unprepared to host this show when I first started. I had no comprehension, understandings, contemplations on so much that I was covering. I was interested in Bigfoot.

I just wanted to talk about Bigfoot. And I think that's how Wes Ghermer found me to begin with. I think he saw a post of mine on a Facebook group about Bigfoot. And he decided to call me, which was just a confirmation. to a prophecy God gave me. Wow. But like, other than that, other than that, like, I didn't, I didn't care to think about UFOs.

I didn't care to think about hauntings and stuff like that. I just, it wasn't on my radar. And so going into the show, you know, you have the first episode is a Bigfoot show. Second one is a UFO show I felt way out of my depths on. This guy, I mean, and I wish, maybe I should try to track him down and redo the interview because, like, he, if I remember correctly, like, he had a very up close personal encounter with the UFO. But I might have a totally different, because I remember back then, it would have a totally different perspective.

Yeah, like, back then I was like, okay, I don't know. The third episode was Lindsay sharing about the Hatman stuff. And I had just started learning about the Hatman. And I was like, my wife had this experience. I was like, nah, whatever. Shadow dude. Yeah, I was like, cool, I guess, you know. Thanks for the third episode, dear.

you know. And then the fourth one was about Nephlam. I brought my professor out, right? I don't remember what the fifth one was, but I do believe it was the 14th. Can you look that up, Jack? If it was the tree sprite, I think it was like the haunted tree sprite.

But it was in the first 20 episodes. I know that. I think her name was Casey, if I remember correctly. But, and I don't remember all the details of this, but I remember hearing her lay out this haunting she was going through actively. and this entity coming into her house from outside, haunting her neighborhood, haunting her, stalking her.

That conversation, it did, it, like, punched a hole in me. It was like, part of me felt like I messed up. I was like, oh, I don't know if I should have had that conversation. Part of me had a lot of intrigue of, like, what was that about?

I don't even comprehend what just that. happened. Yeah. It gave me a reality of if that's real, like, if what she's telling me actually happened, is happening to her, maybe it was my first exposure to the in-depth nature of how active the supernatural, supernatural realm is. Like, this was not just a, oh, I had this one experience. This was like an active, like, tormenting situation.

And again, like I said about episode two of the UFO stuff. if I could talk to her again, I'd probably have a totally different conversation with her. Yeah. You know? Episode 19. First 20. But it's the tree spright haunting, which is actually, it's wild. Like reading the description, this is back when it was a one sentence description.

Oh, yeah. But Casey shares her experiences with hauntings throughout her life, which all seem to be related to her mother's involvement in witchcraft and possession by demons. Which, to your point, yeah, like, to your point, that's within the first 20 episodes. It's not like your mindset is like you've had the the knowledge of hearing 900 episodes, you know, worth of people's experiences. As of today, this recording. Yeah. And because like that's the thing, like it really, the way that you described it as a discovery

journey for yourself, it's like everything. The book was a discovery journey of a personal approach. But this show has been a personal or a discovery journey of the supernatural and, you know, the spiritual warfare that comes with all of things. that. So understanding that in episode 19, you know, even though you've had your own spiritual warfare encounters personally, you don't even, you don't really have a reference. You don't have a frame of mind for these things. So like to have that be, you know, something that impacted you in that way, it makes sense because you didn't know how to really address it with her maybe.

Yeah, totally. I mean, can you read that description again? Yeah, Casey shares her experiences with hauntings throughout her life, which all seem to be related to her mother's involved. in witchcraft and possession by demons. And not knowing how to have that conversation. Yeah. Like, so put me, put Tony, take, take you back to Tony of 2017, having that conversation who is, like, I'm, I'm Christian Christian at this point in my life, right? Like, people look back at the show and I see it in the comments, and I don't fault anybody

for it at all. What you see today is way more than who I was back then. but sometimes I don't think people realize how much of a Christian I was back then. And it's my fault because I thought I had to almost shield people from that. And I was in my head about it. And I thought that God told me to do this podcast with no instruction. So I don't want to mess this up. So I'm doing this, but I don't want to go too hard because maybe I'll ruin it.

You know what I mean? Like I had no concept of God redeeming my failures at that point in my life, you know, like in that way. And so, like, having this conversation with her, I was like, I don't know how to define it. I don't know how to have a conversation about this. This was all mind expanding and blowing me out of the water. And at the same time, in the moment as I'm holding this conversation, I'm like, I think I'm doing something wrong. I don't know if I should have been, I should be talking this person. mind you, probably like a year, year and a half before that, I had a three-hour conversation

with a guy in his house who was a Satanist, who lured me there and beat me up spiritually for three hours. And so like, fast forward to this conversation, I'm like, it must have been bringing up feelings that I had remnant from that, like almost recognizable entities, spirits, you know. And at that time, I didn't recognize that I still had that spiritual. oppression on me that wasn't going to be released for years later, you know? But thinking about this out loud, I haven't talked about this episode in a long time. I haven't thought about it a long time. Like, those kind of situations, that was a good question there, because those are the kind of conversations I had in early days that really stretched me. And the whole time, I'm battling

with myself as I released episodes. Am I doing the right thing or wrong thing? But the only thing I knew I was supposed to be doing was releasing episodes. That's what he told me I had to do. I had to podcast. So that's what I'm doing. And there were plenty of episodes in the early days where I'm releasing an episode. I'm like, I might be doing the wrong thing. And I'm sorry.

You know what I mean? And now looking back on it and stuff, I don't, I wouldn't say I made the bad decision on any of them. I think things I've said on episodes were wrong. And I think that if Tony of today could go back, I would say, hey, hey, hey, chill, bro, you know? Like, one of the things that really makes me sad is in the early days of the podcast, how hard I railed against the church.

Because of my own church hurt feelings. Sure. And what that did, one, for the public perception of who Tony is, because if I'm saying such things, and I'm not reinforcing my love for Christ, people can draw conclusions of who they think I am. Yeah. And I wish I could go back and tell myself to grow up and chill out just because I was hurt by man doesn't mean all men want to hurt me.

You know what I mean? Weren't you probably just trying to keep like that theological boundary? Because I'm thinking here, it's like, I think there's a, you have your own theological background that you're working through at the same time, right? And so with this episode 19, it seems like what it comes to my mind is like, this is personal warfare. Yeah. And so you're not equipped or even like in your theological wheelhouse to comprehend that there's something that won't go away that keeps showing up. That keeps interacting, even though this person, because it's the mother involved, like has nothing maybe directly involved and it's still affecting her.

Like the idea of generational curses. Right. It goes from mother to daughter. Like that's not in the wheelhouse. It's not in the wheelhouse. And you got to think about the civil war that's happening inside me from day one of the show because I have a grandfather who like was a huge part of my molding into being somebody who believes that a supernatural god exists. And at that time I was I was diving into Heiser type stuff before Heiser was popular.

I was in a truck listening to Heiser talk. And at the same time, all that stuff, the supernatural, my fascination with the mystery of that. And back then I didn't call it supernatural. It was like paranormal, you know. at the same time, when you talk about theology, the most current up-to-time theology that I had that I abided by was more reformed. And so, like, I tried, in my own thoughts,

and maybe it came out in the show, and I don't know if it did or not, but I'm trying to intellectualize what I'm hearing in getting myself to a point where intellectually, I can take what I'm hearing as a palatable option of possibility. When there's a whole theological side of me that was screaming, this is not even possible. Therefore, you're sinning and you're messing up, this whole thing that God called you to do, you know?

Which just goes against the nature that you had as a child of wanting to, you know, and see. like wanting to know the mysterious things, you know? You know, Jack, it's like childhood and what God intended, what God created me to be. And the closest, you know, the closer I was to my birth into this world of that design has become almost full circle to today, to today. And it's like my life steered me in a direction that took me away from my original design.

and I went far away in so many different areas in my life. To the point, even in my Christian theological walk, I don't think all reform people are lights by the way, because I have friends that are reformed that hold these conversations with me, but at the time, I didn't at all. The only ones I had were people who were like, this is ridiculous, you know? And so, like, even theologically, it was pulling me away

from what he originally tended me to be, which was a guardian of the frontier, shouting to the world, there's a supernatural enemy over here, and you have to run to Christ. Like, that's the only option here. There is no, well, what if I try that? No, no.

I'm telling you no. And there are people that are not going to believe me. And they're going to think that, well, you just don't know what I know. I'm sorry, you're going to find out what I know. It's just the way it is. Like, I don't have to be ego-driven on this. I don't have to try proving anything to you.

Like, he will show and reveal himself to you. And you can either do it the easy way or the hard way. But I have plenty of people who over the years have tried to offer to talk to me about why being a Christian witch is okay and how it enhances their relationship with God. No. No. It's anti-Scripture. And so like all this stuff is happening inside of me where I'm being pulled. There's a theological side of me.

There's a real world experiential side of me. And then there's what I'm being told side of me. And I'm being pulled. And maybe hindsight looking back, I'm being pulled and who Tony was got ripped apart so that God could place in who he was supposed to be holy, you know. And that's just kind of how it feels like this journey of the last 10 years. has been, it's just been this stretching and ripping off parts of me that just developed over the years that just were not meant to be there to begin with. You know, I mean, it takes me to, what Paul writes about being transformed by the renewing of your mind. You know, you were

throughout a journey here to get to the point where even though it's not, it wasn't easy, you know, and you battled a lot of different things spiritually, you know, encountering a bunch of things throughout the show and just the spiritual warfare that you walk through, it was, and it may not have even been like, you know, until that time when you felt the spiritual release of through that deliverance prayer, you know, that there was true transformation in your mind, you know, but it does give me that sense that you were walking out that scripture, you know, allowing God to transform you even when you were fighting against him. You know, you're talking about that stretching. It's kind of like that stretching was opening up cracks. at times for you to be able to see things differently, to see the things the way that God would intend for you to see it. Yeah. You know?

No, I agree. And I think I write about it in the book, too, at one point, I mentioned about that conference and what happened is it was such an impactful thing for me to realize that something that happened, I think, nine years prior to that point was still affecting me to a point that I had gotten so comfortable and used to it that I didn't even know it was still there. Yeah. You know?

but as this whole thing unfolds, this journey that we're on, that we're still on, you guys are part of the journey, you guys are part of this documentation. Yeah, go with fistbone. He wants a fist bomb. There you go. Like, like, like, God is just, maybe like this book is just a chapter, a page turning of what's going to start unfolding. You know, like, it's going to be a wild journey.

You know, I don't, as of right now, I might change when I'm older, but like, I don't plan on retiring. You know, so if you guys want retire, it's fine. Just give me a heads up. You know, write a resignation letter. Give me a heads up. But I'm probably going to be doing this until I'm dead and not just maybe not to show, but fighting evil and screaming where safety's at, right? And I think if we can just keep it simple like that, I think you guys will be with me. But so as this show has unfolded, there. There have been these moments that if we're true, I have to really consider what we're dealing with. And that on its surface is, okay, fine, if that's true. I don't know if it's true.

But sometimes I had the answer of if it was true or not. And that's when it was like, okay, my suspicions and curiosities are no longer there. I'm now being faced with a new reality or maybe an exposure to what reality is that I only suspected before then. And there's plenty of cases like that. I document them in the book. But one of the ones in the book that I'll bring up right now is Hunter. because Hunter is a very unique case

that ties into so much other things that happen on the show that are in the book because you know I've talked

over the years probably a hundred times or more about episode 692 Dark Shift obviously that's going to be in the book but hunter ties into that in very unique ways. Do you think this is maybe like one of the first true moments where as opposed to just like

you moved into this position of chasing the monster to where you're acknowledging that the monster is actually chasing you almost like you're engaging in something that you thought was very physical and realizing later that it's more spiritual than that you're that you could ever imagine. So, like, the idea of physical and spiritual was always something to consider, but there was no foundation or roots to have a strong leaning either way. It was just something to consider. But Hunter, for that and also how, like, Hunter is like a double-edged sword because it takes the,

what people want to argue cryptids or physical things or whatever. And it's like, he says basically yes and no. And his paradigm shifting because it's physical and spiritual. Through his experience with his son. And part two, the double-edged sword of Hunter is through Hunter, I came to understand that that evil is zeroing in on me. And what's crazy is that leading up to the second interview with Hunter, where he reveals that to me, I had been feeling like God was telling me to prepare for strong spiritual warfare again.

In a very different way than when I went to the Satan's house. When I went to the Satan's house, like, it was very hyper-focused, strong that week. Like, I felt, I couldn't get away from it. Like, God was screaming. You are about to encounter something. You've never experienced before. You better be ready. And I was like, I don't know what you're talking about, God.

Like, I was like, I don't know where this is coming from. Yeah. Yeah. With Hunter, it was like this slow trickle leading up to him. It was like the senses of prepare. Get ready. Prepare. And I sit.

And I'm like hearing this. And I'm like, am I discerning this right? Is this God talking to me? Or is this like me heard one too many of the confessionals? You know, like, am I putting, am I inserting myself into the story? You know what I mean? Because I don't want to do that. Not interested.

And so leading up to that second conversation with Hunter, I was like struggling with, am I hearing God or am I becoming ego driven? You know? And so like Hunter has this experience and I'll just say it real quick for people like he he tells me he has this very vivid dream. We've done down the dream hole so much on this show. This dog man appears to him in this very real dream. It goes after his family. He gets in the middle. It beats him up, tears him pieces. He wakes up, cuts on his back. And you can say he did it to himself because of a nightmare. But about a month later, he's walking through the woods with his son. At the time, I think his son was 11. And the very thing that he thought he dreamt about was standing before him and his son in the middle Tennessee.

And so, like, I have this experience with Hunter where I'm just like, if that's true, we're now talking about something that is both physical and spiritual. And that is like a very rare, thing discussed. It's either this or that. There's two sides of the fence. Sure. They don't usually cross over a whole lot. That was a very dramatic crossover.

How is that possible, right? And so you have these questions. After I was done interviewing him, him and I talk about, because I was already, we had not released episode. I don't think we were this episode with Dark Shift yet,

but I was talking to him about it because I was in the middle of investigating it. And his face, I remember his face was just like, because as I was describing to him, these tunnel systems, he's like, I've experienced that. And so now I'm like, okay, so we got a guy who just had this manifestation of a dream, and he's experienced the tunnels, which JR experienced, and all these other guys, right? So Hunter is now, at this point, categorized my mind as unique and special.

Let's keep in touch with him. And I did. And then about a year later or something like that, he comes out to the studio. And he's talking about some updates of, I guess, maybe... I honestly don't remember what the episode is about. I don't. Ancient Nephilim bloodlines or something like that. Sure.

It's irrelevant to me at this point. What episode number was? Did you remember? 638, I think. Something like that, yeah. But he comes out and we're having a good conversation. It's just me, Hunter. Ward was sitting where Jack is and Joel was sitting next to me.

And then he... He says this, you know, I have something else I want to talk to you about. I just don't know how to talk to you about it. And you could tell how nervous he was. And I remember saying something like, just tell me, what's up, you know? And I remember inside I was kind of getting irritated with him because I was like, dude, just say, what are you talking about? It's like, stop being dramatic, you know? Like, that's what I was thinking.

And I remember he's like kind of hem in and hawing about it. And then he just said to me, there's a number. and then it says a four-digit number to me. And it sounded familiar to me at first, but for a split second, I didn't recognize it. Like, I was like, yes, but why? And then I realized it was my house number. Wow.

And I was like, and that's when I started, like, there was like a Holy Spirit thing happening now where God was entering the room with me and he's like, pay attention, you know? And I realized, okay, something's happening. And like Jack was producing and I started melting. Like, I could feel myself melting. I was losing control of myself.

I was not prepared to do this. Like, I had God warning me. And it was, like, inside, like, I felt it. I could feel it. I was like, okay, it's starting. And I'm not ready for it, God. Like, don't, not, not today. Yeah.

You know, like, not ready. Yeah, it's very personal. Like, it was, it's right at the front lines of your family and, like, everything. And, like, it's, it's something that is. so deep to embrace and like know like go ahead

just hear me out yeah like there have been times where you know the Holy Spirit is moving and you can feel it and you're excited

and this was like that but the opposite because it was like I know where this is going and I don't want it to happen today. I'm not ready now

to do this, but I don't think I ever was going to be ready and I don't think there was any other way. I had to go through it in a way that was going to wake me up. And I'm melting.

Like I'm melting inside. Before I start crying on that episode, like I almost didn't I didn't cry for anybody listening right now. I almost did. Jack, don't look at the camera. But I melted on that episode because I knew the implications of it before he even really started talking. And he starts telling me this dream he has

and he starts accurately describing my house to me. Joel and Derek, or you're Derek, Joel and Ward were here. And they were, they were, able to witness this happened. Jack was able to witness this happen. And we got a guy sitting at the table. Joel and Ward slept in my house in that before. We got a guy sitting at the table who's accurately telling me details of my house. Minus little errors. He said the house number and his vision was the house number was on the house and it's not. It was on the mailbox. And I think he was missing a window or something because he sketched a house. He sketched my neighbor's yard. Like,

He drew this for me. And he's telling me this vision accurately of everything. And he says, and I'm waiting for the punchline. And he says, when he saw me get out of my truck, there's the two cloaked figures standing behind me. I walked behind my house. They followed me into my house. And I think it threw off Ward and Joel and probably even Hunter.

I'm not sure about Jack, which I can speak for himself. but my reaction to that was extreme. And I feel like at least Ward was just like, why is he getting so worked up? This guy clearly is stalking him, right? Like, that's a natural conclusion. Right. And he's not.

I've already, I already feel like I've grilled him hard enough about that side of things. I don't believe that to be the case. But the reason why, had such a strong reaction to it was because of the what I felt leading up to it. And I knew that this was like, I can't remember a time before that day that I had God telling me and preparing me for strong spiritual warfare before the Satan's house. So like if that's my only reference point and God's whispering, prepare, be ready. And then I'm in this moment and it's starting and I can feel

and I know what's happening in my mind, I'm like, I know where this is going, and I'm not here. I can't, I can't do that again. And so, like, because it bests me up a lot. Like, like, that guy's house, like, I'm not, I'm just going to be honest, like, just come in a second. This is why I didn't want to do this. That guy's house. That guy's house wasn't scary. what it did to me spiritually.

I was telling you guys earlier today some things that I've been feeling prodded to open the can on again and I've been through a life where the enemy has ruled and reigned over me. I've seen how dark I can become. And that guy's house didn't pull me in the darkness it pulled me away from God.

like it put this like these blind like I walked out of that house with a blindfold on and I didn't understand and I feel like I understand today but I also don't understand I don't understand God the way he understands himself I don't understand all the supernatural aspects of this world that we live in and there's a part of me that scares the crap out of me to go through that again and it's not the guy's house it's what it did to me Like, I was, I was so, like, confused. And, like, you guys know, like, right now behind the microphone when mics aren't on, like, where we're going and how I feel.

And, like, there's so much riding on our lives. And there has been always something riding in our lives. But I see it now more than I did when I started the show. And I'm so, I'm so, I do not want to accidentally somehow open up a door to the end of me in my life where I give it a foothold to build a wall, a wall between me and God again. And when Hunter, when Hunter brought this to the table, it brought, it brought that back. And, you know, hindsight looking back on it and stuff, it wasn't the same situation. It wasn't, it wasn't me going into a Satanist house that I had to prepare for. Like hindsight, looking back on it, it was actually awesome.

Because my strong spiritual warfare, he was whispering to me about, and that Hunter brought to the table was because of, who I was turning into and what I was about to be become. I was no longer going to be sitting behind the table saying, gee, shucks, maybe. I was going, it was starting, it was the beginning steps of the journey of becoming a soldier. And embracing that. And so, like, looking back at that, like,

I can see clear, more clear as to why God, God was whispering that and where all that went. Like, yes, attack happened. Obviously, like, it's been almost nonstop. Like, we could do an entire episode, probably every other week for people just to give him an update on what's going on. It's constant. Like, to the point that when we hired Jason, we told him, this is what's going to happen

if you accept this job. Like, we tried scaring him out of taking the job. Because, like, seriously, like, I'm just wiping a snout of here. It is what it is. But like, it's no joke. No, it's not. And the more you do it, the more you see it. And so, like, I'm good with it.

I understand what my calling is in life, though. And so it's like, Jason, are you okay with this? Like, you need to pray about this and make sure that this is something that God wants you to do because guarantee you're being roped in if you accept this job. Absolutely. And you both can attest to that. Sure thing.

And so, like, looking back at that moment with Hunter, Hunter, double-edged sword, two stages for the show. But that second episode, it's funny, actually, because now I'm thinking about it, I just kind of reacted the way I reacted on that episode. But that's why. Like, I'm actually, like, able to verbalize why I reacted that way. And it's, it's a very scary thing. Like, once you're in the grace of God, in his presence and you're walking in him and then you go through a situation

where you feel like whether you did something or you were attacked, something happened and you feel this gap between you and God and you have this big giant question mark of I don't know how to get you back. And then you stumble your way through it and you're now at the point where like,

I feel good, you know, I got this relation with God again and we're growing again. Praise God. The idea of that happening again, that separation happening again, it'll scare the crap out of you. It scares the crap out of me at least. And there's so much more riding on my life today than there was back then, you know,

at the Satan's house. Like, like, if I sink, if I fall, like, that ain't good for anybody. I got kids, my wife, you guys, your families, like, there's just so much. The world that watches the platform. And so I would say Hunter took me from crypto zoology to supernatural warfare in the same person on the show. And his story and his life and what has happened with him is probably a good, all-encompassing what is the confessionals exposing war in kingdoms. It's that. It's somebody who is a Christian, who is a worship pastor at his church in Middle Tennessee,

who never really thought any of this could be possible, finds himself having experiences somewhere else, essentially, and the monsters, the demonic forces that are on that side that attacked him came to this side, still hunting him. And the only refuge is Christ. the only refuge is God protection over your life. And he knows that. I know that. And that's kind of what this book is about.

It's my journey through this understanding through my life and people's lives that I've had on the show that brought me to this point where this stuff is real. The stuff that I talk about on the show, I don't care if everybody in the world thinks is real. People who are watching right now, who are returning listeners, and viewers, I'm telling you, yes. If you wonder, I'm telling you right now, the answer is yes. I believe this stuff is real. It is absolutely real.

And this is why. Because I've experienced it. I've seen it. I have been vocal publicly about this. I don't believe that I've done things right when it comes to the documentaries. I thought it was in the moment. I thought I was doing handling a very responsibly as a Christian, but looking back on it, I'm not sure. I'm not so sure.

And maybe that's just my conviction, too. I don't expect everybody else to have those kind of convictions, you know, but for me, my conclusions, my convictions. When I was charged in the woods that night by an invisible force, it's taken things I hear about in the show, things that I've come to believe because of the show. And now I put myself in a situation where it's now happening. to me. And we were out there hunting dog man. And I don't know if it was a dog man that charged me in the woods that we couldn't see. And then sounded off supernatural screaming behind us with the monkeys. Jack was there for this. Like Jack can attest to this that he heard it. He wasn't with me when it happened. He was at base camp and it was so loud he could hear it back at base camp.

There were monkeys in the woods in Tennessee. That's crazy. There were monkeys. But on the audio, it's owls. Oh, owls can sound like monkeys. I get that. But in the moment, they were not owls. What we hear on the recording is not what any of us heard in person. In person, it was monkeys after a loud, almost like witchy scream in the woods. And that was right after me and Joel were charged by an invisible force. This stuff's real. The supernatural realm's real. There is competing kingdoms. There is warring kingdoms. And there is a kingdom of darkness in the kingdom of light. Jesus himself spent a lot of time talking about the kingdom of God for a reason. If there's only one kingdom, he wouldn't have to identify it. There is a kingdom of

darkness. It has structure. It has order. And the subject is humanity. You are the subject of the attention. And so that's what this book is about exposing these warring kingdoms and who ultimately wins in the end. I find it like is just, you know, the realization that we can't sit and hope that we can just be on the sidelines and secondarily watch everything else happen, that all of it is very personal. And the enemy comes in to attack us in the personal realm. And so it's interesting, like you're talking about, you know, you went to the witches, the warlock's house, right, ignorantly, right? And then that affected you. And then later on, now you have witches showing up at your house spiritually to attack you and to oppress you. And so you're moving in this journey from

discovery all of a sudden to victory, right? And so I think this is like the next chapter God's moving all of us into is like, we get that it's real. We get that it's true. We don't really question anymore the possibility of what can happen. We don't, we don't even like, we don't even waste breath with that conversation anymore. It is about how can I claim victory for myself, but then also give that victory to others. And I think that's what's so beautiful about where God is calling you is God is calling you to bring that victory to others. And the shift in the platform, the shift in how God's used you, and even in like your theology and your process of your own relationship with him, he's moving you to not only be a guardian of the frontier, but I think

to be someone who is going to bring victory to those in the darkness. So, Jack, I don't know, do you have anything? No, those are great points, Derek. I think it's pretty evident that there's, you know, not just through being with this podcast, but just in everybody's life, without recognition sometimes, I think people walk through a lot of heavy spiritual warfare.

And I think part of that is there's a, there's a knowledge of what that person can do to shed the light on the dark and what that impact is going to be. And I think that, you know, being the brother of the man whose name is on the book, I can attest to the change in the person and also the impact that he has not only on, you know, us in this business, but on a lot of people, you know, around the world. So, So yeah, if you haven't already got a copy of the book, feel free to check it out on Amazon. You can get the link's going to be in the description. It's probably going to be in the comments, the pin comment.

But absolutely check out the confessionals exposing warring kingdoms by yours truly Tony Merkel. Out today. It's available today. Yes. It is now available, the long-awaited arrival. And like I said, guys, it's been quite a journey of writing this thing. it took me a while, which I didn't think so.

I didn't think it would be that it would be so hard because it's just like, how hard can it be to find Bigfoot? Yeah. I'd say I'm still looking, but I stopped. But yeah, thanks everybody for the support that you've given me over the years. We've been doing it for the time of this release.

We're almost at a decade of doing the show, over 900 episodes. and maybe we're only halfway through the journey of the show. You know, maybe, because every time I hit a spot in the show, I always felt like, okay, I guess this is it. And then God revealed another chapter. I remember the whole portal phase of the show. Oh, yeah.

Like, I was like, I don't know how, where to go from here. I've reached the pinnacle portals. That's how I got in the show. Yeah, you did that portal episode with me. And so, like, you know, I just was like, it doesn't get any better than this. And God's like, oh, you have no idea, bro. And so I just think that the next 900 plus episodes

is going to be equally as wild and full of a journey. And I just thank everybody who's been with me for going on a decade. And people who watch it on YouTube and listen on Apple and Spotify, it's just been wild to see. And, you know, people will ask you things like, you know, I'd like to have your advice

on building a podcast, you know. And it's like, well, submit to the king. You know, because, like, honestly, like, I mean, I've been an entrepreneur all my adult life and I've failed at all the businesses I've started, except for this one. This is the first thing that I started that was successful, but this is the only thing that God told me before I started that I was going to start it. And so kind of like just ask God to reveal his will for your life and then just have the bravery to walk in it and just be along for the ride and journey and see where it goes.

it may not be a podcast, you know, it might be becoming a better father, you know, better husband, wife or mother. And that could be just the beginning stages, just like episode one was about Bigfoot and I had no idea where the show was going. Just responding to the call of being a better person to those you're supposed to love and call the love, that can be the beginning stages of a wild journey when you just start submitting that life over to him and you're just like, your will be done. When you say your will be done, oh my gosh, he's like, now I can work with that. You know? And it's just now you're on a roller coaster with God. And 10 years they're going to go by and you're going to have one heck of a story to share. So let that be an encouragement hopefully to people. Thanks for tuning in to this episode. And I don't know how to end an episode where it's about the book. So I guess Tony, thanks for being here, Tony.

I don't know. You got it, Tony. Yeah. Tony, thank you and thank you for this wonderful book. Oh, yes. It's out now. You better make sure you pay for that. All right.

Thanks, guys. You want to know? You sure you want to know? Too late. Confessional! Down, down, down we go. Rabbit hole. Lose control.

UFOs. Big for those goals. Tell me what you saw. Let's go. Down, down, down we go. Things get weird on this. show dark gets exposed when the light gets closed welcome to the confessionals mic check on one two what followed you red red eyes tree line bro that thing flew

lights in the sky nobody knows three knocks outside don't open that door wait you said it had wings keep talking big big big big big big big foot dog man nephilem yeah something in the air orbs portals things unseen everybody thinks it's crazy till they see lose control you're foe's big foot portals goes tell me what you saw let's get on this show dark is exposed when the light gets closed Welcome to the Confessionals Watch the giants ancient rebellion secret room strange intelligence black helicopters lights overhead Government says ain't nothing there okay sure then what was that Follow the deliverance kingdoms collide dark ones the spotlight truth doesn't hide demons won fear deception wants fame but everything changes a Jesus name

Rabbit hole lose control UFOs bigfoot portals goes tell me what you saw let's go on this show And that's when things get weird