The Cryptid Factor - 39: #039 The Free Movie Ideas Issue

Episode Date: August 16, 2018

Amongst some genius free movie script ideas, you'll find extinct Gibbons in China, new Northern Lights that aren't in the north and a bird-rubbish-collection-treat-racket. In Cryptid news - A big man-dog & a little girl shoots Nessie. Also two BRAND-NEW SEGMENTS! (as well as one old long forgotten segment... for good reason) and Buttons is lacking pants, but makes up for it with an additional chin. Enjoy!

The Cryptid Factor, with Rhys Darby and Dan Shriver. Hello! I try to say hello in a way that will surprise, excite and shock the listeners. But you shocked yourself? I do, I normally do. I scare very easily, despite my military training and often I scare myself. That's one of the reasons they kicked me out in the end. It seems silly and I know it seems almost Winnie the Poohish. But when he was frightened of his own shadow, I think it was in one of the books, that was me. You're so panicky as it is. You've got your army gear on, you're walking through the forest, you've got your gun at the ready.

Any moment now, something could jump out, an enemy obviously. So you're looking around, you're scanning and I've always had great priffs. My peripheral vision is one of the reasons they wanted me in the army in the first place. They said, how are your priffs? I said, who said that? And the guy was behind me and I said, well move slightly to my left and there he was. He came into my vision and he says, I'm on your priffs now. He says, you're in my priffs now? I said, no, I'm behind you. He said, no, I said you're in there.

I said, you're here to the left? What type of shirt have I got on? I said, army shirt? And I was in. So my priffs are good. What kind of trousers? Army trousers? Car key. Car key trowel. Army boots? How many? Two. So I was in. But then patrolling around in the forest and I know this is a bit of an aside

and amongst many asides that I've given so far. Three minutes in. Four asides. Literally three minutes into the show and we're now deep in the forest on an army expedition. Restabe explaining his peripheral vision in a panicky situation. And I could see out of the corner of my eye something. Pick a mean word. Pick a mean word. S. Sniper. Sniper.

It was not a sniper. It was my shadow. God damn it. Because the sun was coming up. It was going down rather than our shadows went really long. When they go real long. And I saw some movement in the trees and I thought it was some. And it was my shadow and I jumped and unfortunately I made a bit of a shriek. You know just a subtle sort of. And then what was it? I saw something.

I thought it was your shadow and I went. Ah yeah. So that's just one of the instances that sort of led me to eventually leaving. Leaving or being asked to leave? Big difference. Alright let's move on with the show. You're not going to use any of this. Let's kick into the weekly world weird news. Weekly world weird news. Crazy. Spreeky. Watch out.

I gotta go on. A new species of extinct ape. A gibbon has been discovered in the tomb of an ancient Chinese noble woman. Wow. Yeah. Now this is the grandmother of China's first ever emperor. And they went inside her tomb. And they've never been in there before. And inside it in almost like a cabinet. Like a filing cabinet. They found an extinct species that no one's ever seen before.

Which was kept as her pet. Wow. And it's a gibbon that doesn't exist in that area. But where's Buttons gone? Sorry I've just seen that he's disappeared. Yeah I didn't want to interrupt but Buttons has left. I heard a phone ring and he's gone to answer it. Here he is. He's returned. I'm back. Sorry about that.

So what did you think of that Buttons? Did you hear what Dan just said? Amazing. An extinct thing. An extinct? Yeah. Can you just repeat what Dan said? They thought it was extinct. And it's come back again. A thing that is in Egypt. Was it a mummy? An extinct mummy?

Was it in Egypt? Good try. It was on the phone. We know you went and answered a phone call. We can see it. This is video. We can see all the videos. I thought you might have noticed this. The listeners know we can see it. We can see your little body disappear from the screen.

Nice underpants by the way. Could you not like some frowsy with a podcast? I think we should reveal that. Yes. Buttons has no pants on today. Or should I say only pants. Look at those. They're quite bum-hugging up. They're a good quality one.

They're very good quality. And it's very hot here. So I don't like wearing pants trousers. Dan, you go back and just remind us again what happened when they opened this tomb. See, I told you it was a mummy. Mate, I'm trying to tell my story. I'm just saying. I was listening.

So what they found was not a mummy, but sort of an ancient cabinet where you would file away things. And inside was a gibbon, an extinct species of gibbon. This is 2,200 years old. And it belonged to the first emperor of China's mum. This is her tomb.

And they've never seen this before. And it's a gibbon in a place where gibbons never existed. So they don't know if it's an out of place gibbon that was sort of taken as a pet and put there. Or if there was a whole variety of gibbons that lived in this bit of China that were wiped extinct and we just never knew were part of the landscape. The Chinese haven't yet allowed scientists

to properly identify which species it might be. As in they've seen the skull and they've seen the bone and it doesn't look like any other species that we have, but they haven't allowed them to officially confirm it through DNA testing and measurements and so on. But they definitely know it's a gibbon. Yeah, they definitely know it's a gibbon. The exact same shape of the skull is the same.

The body size is the same. But it has differences that means that it's definitely different. But they used to keep them as pets. So this would have been just, you know, walking your dog, walking your gibbon. That would have been what they did back in the day. Absolutely. I mean, the days of royalty having exotic pets.

I mean, that's just part and parcel with being a royal leader. Yeah, exactly. Can they bring this gibbon back to life by taking its DNA and recreating it like they are with the woolly mammoth? Yeah. I mean, I literally did just say that the Chinese government are not allowing them to do any DNA tests. And you were sending them.

No, but I'm just saying, I heard that better. It's almost better when he's actually not there. At least you can imagine he's listening. No, but I'm just saying. No, answer another message. That would be cooler. Yeah. No, I'm just saying, can they, of course they can.

It's cool as well. This tomb, they've sort of called it a grave menagerie because they found not only the gibbon, but there was skeletons of leopards and a lynx and bears and cranes and all sorts of, yes, it was just this bone zoo sitting there around the grandmother or the mother of the first ever emperor of China. Wow.

Wow. He was an interesting guy. I'll just quickly tell you about him, Qin. He was the guy who is responsible for the Great Wall of China. He was an amazing character and he was convinced of immortality. He thought that there was an elixir to life that would keep him alive and it's what killed him in the end because he was prescribed bits of mercury that were given to him to help him to extend his life.

Wow. He ended up poisoning himself and in the fables of where he's buried, they said that he built a river of mercury around him and that's where he was buried. We kind of think we know where he's buried now and they've done a mercury reading outside of it and the levels are through the roof. Wow. So they think they're going to open it and find these rivers of mercury

where the first emperor is and he was convinced that he had met a wizard who had told him about the elixir of life and this wizard disappeared off and was said to live on a weird mountain somewhere. Wow. So the emperor of China commissioned boats to go off to find this wizard and the elixir of life and the boats that went off never returned because if they returned then didn't find it, they would have been killed and there's a theory that the boats that went off were the people

who went on to establish Japan as a country and as a people because they were looking for the wizard who had the elixir of immortality. Such a cool story. Wow. That's so awesome. That's like an Indiana Jones movie. You know, like Indiana Jones and the elixir of life. I was reading about the Great Wall of China just this morning actually

saying that it is one of the world's greatest monuments to failed intentions and the fact that it was built to keep the Mongol invaders out but they managed to still get through these gaps that they accidentally left in the wall so it's like a monument that can be seen from space to show how humans are available, which is quite nice. They can't see it from space though. They can't. Yeah, every Chinese astronaut that goes up, that's their mission to try and spot it.

They just can't. They keep, literally it's like you have to see it and they've still not seen it. So you can't see it from space? That's just a myth? Yeah, that's just a myth. So the original myth which I think was in the Guinness World Records or Ripley said you could see it from the moon and then it got downgraded to space

but you can't even see it from space. Interesting. Wow. Fantastic news, Dan. And I think if Steven Spielberg, who I'm sure does listen to this podcast, has heard any of that, I think we'll find that in Indiana Jones 5 which I think is coming out in a couple of years. Probably even add the China wall bit buttons if you're lucky.

Oh man, see this is the thing. We should be charging people to listen to this stuff. Like this is the thing, we're inspiring artists around the world. Well then we'll get less listeners than the few we already have. What happened to that show? Well they started charging 10 years in and they lost half their followers. Only the very wealthy, listen now, at 200 quid an app. It's a bit of an asking price.

Well when people are getting movie scripts given to them, gifted to them. 200 quid is a cheap deal, isn't it? Yeah. Well keeping within the realms of mystery and wonder, which I think is a wonderful realm to keep in, there is a mystery sky glow which is unknown to science over Canada but it's leaving scientists scratching their heads. And that's not because it's dropping nits.

It is an aurora. Obviously the greatest aurora is the northern lights but there's some new lights. And this is where I find hilarious. They've named it Steve. They have, they've named it Steve but it's an acronym. Although I don't think it was when they first named it but they've changed it into an acronym for Strong Thermal Emission Velocity Enhancement.

Pretty cool, huh? But I've just made it up to make the word Steve. They have, I actually heard about Steve. Yeah, it was named after a cartoon. Oh really? Yeah, there's a movie called Over the Hedge. Oh right, yes. Yeah, so they called it Steve and then to stop the embarrassment

when people actually caught on to it. They gave it an acronym backwards. The acronym works so it works out quite well but it says here it reaches temperatures of up to 10,800 degrees Fahrenheit which is the same as the Earth's core. Wow, wow. I mean how do they measure that? How do they know that that aurora in space or in the sky is that hot?

I mean, where does that come from then information? Yeah, they got a thermometer. They throw a thermometer up there? Yeah, yeah. Attached to a kite? What does it read Steve? 10,800. Can we name it after me?

All right, it's a bit of a stupid name but okay mate. You got the kite to the full extent of the string? Yeah. Good. How is it? It's 16 miles, 16 miles high. Actually it's 16 miles wide and thousands of miles long. Wow.

It's pretty awesome. And there's a video here I'd like to play now and... Wow. Look at that. It's like a tornado. Yeah, everyone should check out this video. It's like an awesome music video. Yeah.

So yeah, there we have it. Very cool. There's a blog that talks about auroras called the aurorasaurus. Cool. Yeah, which I originally read about on. So what's interesting is that since we've been noticing aurora borealis, this has been going on and experts have just not spotted it. So that was amazing in itself.

And then they're now saying it's not even an aurora, it's just a completely separate new category, like the gibbon. It's just like a new category of light phenomena and they're still looking into it. Yeah, it fascinates me because it's something that we're just noticing now. And I worry, I don't worry. I have a slight concern that it's there for a reason.

It's some sort of message. It's something for us to look up. But more about that. And in my new section on today's show called Derby's Disclosures. And that's coming up straight after the weekly World Weird News. Derby's Disclosures. It's a new feature. It's a new feature.

It comes with a new sting. New sting. So that's happening after your news buttons. So new that not even the other people in the podcast know about it. That is very, very new. Yeah, this is breaking news to us. Yeah. I hope your weird news is good buttons because I'm too excited

to see what Derby's Disclosures are. Don't talk this up. Maybe we just skipped my news. I mean, it's been very busy. I've got jet lag. Didn't even hear you talking about DNA. You always bring the gold. Well, I think you've come right now.

And I think the listeners really look forward to your news every week button. So we can't skip your bit. Exactly. It just needs to be that extra bit good this week because of Derby's Disclosures. We need to keep the show something got really hot. We got really hot now. We need to keep it. You can imagine the graph now.

I think there's a lot of heat in the graph. Oh, no. Yeah. The numbers are high. Let's not lose them. Let's not lose them. OK, we've gone from DNA-less bones and a mummy enclosure through to Steve, the big pretty lights.

Now, before Derby Disclosures, Brainy Crows trying to pick up trash at Theme Park. That's my headline. So just... Oh. I mean, it's pretty much all there in the title. But let me... There they are. There you go.

That's the birds picking up the trash. So my story is riveted, as you all are, to find out the details. Yep, yep. It's in France in a theme park called Poudifou. Pidifou. Pidifou. Pidifou. Pidifou.

Why does he do it to himself? Why does he come up with stories where for a start he can't pronounce the name? That's not my fault. They've called it something that people like me can't pronounce. Anyway, this is a theme park that has period villages and gardens and historic reenactments, our type of theme park. And what they've done... Oh, cool.

Rather than paying for people to go around picking up all the little bits of litter that these dirty tourists leave around the place, they've trained six crows to fly around and pick up the trash and take it and put it into the rubbish bins. And so they're like, yeah, genius really. And so they get... Obviously they've trained these birds by giving them little rewards every time they pick up trash and what have you. And so now they're looking...

It's working so well, they're looking to keep training them and then to lease them out to other theme parks and places where they don't want to pay for real people to pick up the rubbish. You know what? This is actually genius and it's something that's so obvious. Why hasn't this happened before? We all know how fantastically talented birds are. They used to use them in the wars to do the messaging. Exactly.

And yeah. And so it's been so many years since we've... The studies into bird behaviour and especially crows, I'm surprised it's taken this long to lead to the use of them and a great use of them too. It's a cool idea. Well, yeah. And it's quite simple. When they deposit a piece of trash into a little drawer, another little compartment opens up

and they get a tasty little treat and so they could do that with tourists. If you put... Even without the birds, if you put a piece of rubbish in the rubbish bin, like a little M&M or something like that pops out and you get a little lolly. One single M&M drops out. Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

It's like exciting. But that rubbish away you might get yourself a little treat. A single M&M falls down. M&M, you don't catch it. It lands on the ground. Oh yeah. You stamp on it. It's a bit of a kick in the teeth to the job force, isn't it?

Like AI is taking out most jobs with cell service sort of checkouts and supermarkets. Now the animal kingdom has come in. Yeah. Taking more jobs. What do humans want? We want a piece of this. We want a piece. We want a piece.

Ollie, you want a job? Ollie, you want a job? All right, you birds. The cool thing I'm singing is that the bigger and bigger the rubbish that needs to be collected, the bigger and the bigger birds you could get. The bigger birds. Like have a training mass of albatross that comes swoopy down to pick up, like... Well even things like, if someone left a dirty old backpack or something like that.

There you go. No one wants to touch it because you know with with with with terrorism issues and things like that There's someone so there's a backpack there that's been left. Yeah, let's let's let's let's bring in the giant eagle Here comes Terrence he's coming in look at those massive talons pick up that backpack always got it Why you go mate get it away from us Ah Shit That's the end of him still we're all fine

Put the new sticker up on the window will you position available Ah Large bird required for possible bomb disposal It's genius going back to the going back to the simple crows a few questions I have so you there's only six of them. Yeah, why is there six of them? They've trained six Well, what they're saying is that what they what they want to happen more than having the crows pick up every piece of rubbish Because there's probably not all that efficient I let's be honest is for them to inspire all the other tourists and visitors to the park

I thought you're gonna say birds Don't be annoying don't be a rat with wings just you know look at the crows and by the way, yes They've got sparkly uniforms those six our favourites the little guys there with the little tiny medals and their little tiny name tags which I Gotta admit we shouldn't have stabbed into their chest Make yourself useful and you can have one yourself even lovely uniform like that How do these six crows distinguish themselves from other birds that might be like flying around thinking?

I'll pick up a bit of stuff for a treat. Hey, you're not one of the official picker rappers That's a good one see that's a good thing. Maybe that's what they're after is exactly that to happen Maybe these crows are incentivised and they get double treats later If they recruit it's like a pyramid scheme for the like one birds get two two friends And then they get more treats than the two friends and if those two friends get four or five other friends And then they and then the first yeah bird gets more and more treats every time it gets a piece of rubbish So you see how that could work. I think this is how Alfred Hitchcock's the birds Scheme by crows in a theme park and it went

And turned into chaos all they wanted were the treats Yeah, they were and unfortunately the humans ran out of M&Ms I Know it's terrible way to win but again another see another good movie idea, but somebody just got that for free They should be paying 200 pounds for these shows That's another good movie. I dare isn't it a pyramid scheme of pills goes wrong Depends how you look at it bud and super. Well, I could have just I just told you about Alfred Hitchcock's movie idea So I've really just stolen

Oh Everything's a sequel these days. We're essentially stealing It's an adaptation We like to adapt ideas you pay your 200 bucks for the for the podcast and then you get some movie script ideas But you also get ideas that we've stolen off others So if you use one of our stolen ideas, you know, that's you've just got to learn which is it's a get it's a 50-50 gamble Nobody knows until they steal one of our ideas and release it into the world and then you might get a lawsuit You might not so that's how we're protecting our ideas people listen to our podcast and they go might steal that idea go

Oops, it might be one of the fakie ideas might be one of the ones that's going to get me in trouble talking about movie ideas they will pop there's one of those is going to pop up and The second of our two new sections in this show Notice board which is cut which is coming at the end of the show There's a new section called the cryptid factored notice board came up with the idea today. I had a couple of ideas Implementing them community not just without asking you guys community notice board at the end and There's an in that you'll see there's I'm gonna have a brief chat about a cryptid movie. That's that's out

I believe in the cinemas but more more about that later in the show Our stories are almost ad-bred It's time guys, are you ready for the new segment it's Derby's disclosures Well now it's out there Derby's disclosures The first edition of Derby's disclosures hello and welcome to the you starting a new show It's a small show within the show. It's not gonna take up too much time If you don't mind you guys aren't actually in this part of the show

Just be quiet. We're gonna see two of you guys pop up on the screen. Yeah I've got a couple of guests this week on Derby's disclosures No, I don't I don't but This is a small segment only goes for a couple of minutes, but each week I disclose a little bit more information about Aliens and about the drip feed of disclosures that allow us to realize that Up ahead of us very soon. The big reveal is is happening if it's not already happening under our very noses This week a NASA astronaut Claims to have said on Twitter

Because it's written down and you can see it's not just a claim. It's actually there That he That he may have seen an alien life form on a space shuttle Okay, and a brief exchange with a you of where with a UFO investigator on Twitter Melvin, let's just call the astronaut Melvin. His actual name is Leyland Melvin Leland So surname is Melvin. So it sounded like you're trying to give him a secret name

Who's just happened to be Melvin was asked what he thinks about alien theories He was asked whether or not he believes that there is intelligent alien life Residing in our solar system now most people would expect such a question to be met with a laugh from a NASA scientist such as such as Melvin But he threw a curveball by claiming that he once thought he saw an alien creature inside the space shuttle Itself inside it. Yeah, so this is this is the question from the UFO investigator What's your outlook about the existence of intelligent alien life living in our solar system? Have you ever witnessed a UFO?

Please share with us. Thanks and Leland Melvin, let's just call him Melvin That's his actual name. I have This is his reply. I have not seen one in space or on the ground But thought I saw something organic forward slash alien like floating out of the payload bay Hmm And I called the ground

Called the ground crew the ground staff to ask what it could be and it was ice that had broken off of the Freon hoses Translucent curved organic looking. That's what they told him it was so So there's been you know a few reports here There's you know the the internet have sort of Taken this and run with it and had their own theories and so I'm simply I'm simply doing the same thing and you know A lot of people are thinking oh, it's just click bait. He's clearly said it's ice anyway, but here's the thing You know, why would he even mention it?

And then if anything he'd backtracked a little bit within his own tweet by saying oh But I think it was pretty much just ice because that's what they said it was But why did he even mention it then because that's obviously something that has stuck with him. He he has seen He has seen some sort of organic locking Format that would may have been cased with an ice that it was released from from a from a spaceship Payload Bay, and this is a guy who will have seen ice He's aware. Yeah, he knows it. Yeah, I mean, you know these incredibly smart, you know people astronaut scientists I mean, I think it's it's pretty intriguing. It's pretty cool. And that's it. That's a little snippet from this week's

Darby's disclosures Okay, you're telling them yeah Okay, I want to say something we'll say something more next week, but till now. I just want you to sit there and just do some more research Are you gonna leave yeah, yeah, I shouldn't have shut the door. I'm sort of in here with you now, but No Between being you know sort of feeling a little bit left out that I'm not part of that segment But also kind of happy that my credibility isn't attached to that segments news Worthiness, all right. Yeah, it's risky. It's risky. Yeah, that's especially with my profile

You know turn to the left because your side profile does need a bit more taking care of Yeah Yeah, what's happening there? That's it's a standby chin. Oh, okay, something happens today. I'm gonna say I've got another one ready to go You're gonna back up. Yeah I noticed the same with me the other day I was looking at myself on TV and when I turned I did a profile shot and I thought go what's going on with my neck like it's It's kind of it's not, you know, cuz you don't see that much I wanted to have more of a I've got too much neck

Yeah, and I thought honestly I like you and I like I looked at I thought God it looked like I'm a pelican who's sort of Swallowed a massive fish Injections now I got some clickbait the other day and they can put injection. Yeah, and they put apparently something like your Body acid your acid from your stomach and then inject it into your Chin and it eats away your double chin. Is that right doesn't sound right does it that sounds That sounds hideous like there's something that's slowly eating away at your double chin while you're cruising around town I say I'm gonna say your double chin slowly diminishing Yeah, it's a new a new tablet I got I

Say tablet, it's a leech. I had to swallow that eats me from the inside Attention all personnel it's time for this week's cryptid I have a video there's not much information here, but I want to show you guys a video It is of a supposed half human half dog at seven foot tall And it's a guy who's filming his dog in a forest battling with this creature and and as I say there's not much information But I watched the video and I thought I have to talk about this So have a watch of this and you'll see the dog run into a shot in a second. So it's barking away

Look at What is that oh My goodness now the man's yelling hey, hey at it. I gotta say I nearly had one of my army's frights there Very big and black and menacing It was it like a wolf. Oh, here we go Because that dog itself is the size of an Alsatian that's a big dog That's a huge beast, but it's like the size of a massive bore or something, you know, like I'm yeah huge and

See you wonder because all these dogman sightings that are surfacing at the moment you you've got to wonder whether or not That's what people are seeing because if I saw that That I would swear I'd seen a huge man dog type thing, you know, it was huge also from the video It looked like it started off. You could see that the small It looked like you know a small body like a hit. It was a head in the distance there. It's like it's crouched Yeah, like so and then then when it actually took off it just got huge like it almost interdimensionally grew exactly I really think we got to keep our eye out for this this dogman news because there seems to be a lot of dogman related kind of sightings and

News coming up at the moment. So yeah, it's it's exciting if that's what that is now We've got a brand new photograph of Nessie. That's just come up and this is In the last day or so the best picture of Nessie in years a girl by the The age of 12 has snapped the Loch Ness Monster on her iPhone During the first day of her holiday after seeing it appear just 50 feet away. I mean what luck You're 12 years old. Wow. You go on your little holiday to Loch Ness. You know about the legend day one You got your phone out. Oh, there it is snappity snap. Got it. Yep. Got it. Let's move on The the photo is good. It's definitely a

Head and neck coming out of the lock. So that's that's the money shot people want Charlotte Robinson from Leeds 50 feet from the shore Nessie surfaced for about a minute before resurfacing about 10 feet further away Some seven minutes later and there's some lovely quotes here that I remember her saying from oh, yeah I just took what I saw. It was black. I just don't know how far it was out of the water I'm not good at judging distances I'm 12

She's only 12, you know, but after after about a minute it disappeared and then came back up again in a different place Which is awesome that that happened. It was up for less than a minute the second time I kind of believed in Nessie, but I wanted to see the proof. I always imagined her as having a long neck and flippers And there's a lovely picture of her Holding the phone look at her That's a little girl Charlotte that took what happens to Charlotte now Does she you know the recent crypto cons that you guys have been visiting the alien cons? Yes. Yeah You see people who've just taken a snap like this who build a lecture career

Absolutely, could she off this one photo now have a you know spots next to you know, Gimlin and Vondaneke in at these Obviously not as big a bill but could is I would love to think so Because if she had the original photo with oh, yeah, and people want to meet someone who is connected to Yeah, seeing cryptids because you know not many people get to see them and even less get to actually photograph something And so I think there's certainly a there's a mysticism and a celebrity that's attached to it But of course, she's so young that you know, I don't think your parents would let that happen But what a great photo and she seems very very happy

I'm sure it was you know, this will be a holiday. She never forgets And you know that the thing is is what they they always say with with cryptids and particularly with the Sasquatch thing is that They come out more for children and there's something to do with and it's the same thing I believe they say with with spirits and ghosts as well Not that we talk about them, but that children have a deeper connection a more real connection to anything that's spiritual Or not of our realm. Let's send more kids To these areas that send kids up into the Pacific Northwest and into the Sierra Mountains. Let's send scouts boys brigades or girl guides to look for Sasquatch

Hell let's send let's send kids into space imagine what they'll see cuz also they're quicker with their phones That is so that's why she's got a such a good pic. They are so quick I mean, we're like a hang on now. I've got a which app is it hang on. I'm just looking on here I've got so many apps. Oh, there's a couple of messages. I haven't replied to it's gone You're kidding me. I can't even get the lock screen undone. What's the code? Facial recognition my ass and my phone never recognizes my face, you know We have to look the same every day What's going on with that neck? I mean, there should be neck recognition that would be a good thing for middle-aged men, wouldn't it?

What's your phone? My phone's got a neck recognition. So it depends if you had those diminishing leech pills or not, but for me You do a side-on profile and as long as your neck isn't slowly diminishing over the day. Yeah, you can't see your phone any time Well, my my crypto news is not actually Crypto news. I'm well, it's another segment guys Bringing No, see Reese has invented two new segments Yeah, I'm gonna bring back a segment that we haven't had for a very long time Okay, wow, this is you're bringing an old segment back that we that we decided wasn't good enough

It was a heavily buttoned segment it was Oh, well, it's just one we can't use often because it's so such rare Material to be able to get for the show and the segment is I Love this one. I love it. So There's a new vocalization guy. Somebody has recorded the sound of an angry sesquatch Somewhere in North America now very much like your news Dan, this is a random video. It's on YouTube. It doesn't say where the location was

It just says it was in a big hot spot. They don't want to reveal the location. They also don't reveal The identity of the person who obtained the audio But they say it is a very angry big foot if you're at home, you can search this up But here is basically the audio of this very angry sesquatch. See if you guys can hear this Okay, this camera's first was set up on a tripod and left running its own for a few hours What you're about to hear is very real angry screams of a big foot It's during the day the footage is during the day Here it comes guys. It's quite the build up. Hey, I wish I didn't have a train to catch

I wish I did Unfortunately, I can stay you're missing it. Sorry Yeah, yeah, heavy breathing. Yeah, or is that you? Oh Wow I Look forward to listening to this properly on the actual podcast Yeah, yeah, when you're not putting the audio through three different types of phones speakers and air buds

Because you know, they're out there. There's recordings of sasquatches generally But if there's if you guys have got any other vocalizations You could send links to us and we can play them on the show of any Cryptid creature or anything weird and we can discuss what we think it might be Noises in the dark, but not just your dad downstairs on his computer or something. It's got to be Outside possibly from another realm But it is a cool thing. All right, we're wrapping this show up. We've got our final segment, which is a Brand-new one not just an old rehash from the past. It's notice board comes comes with a new sting. Here it is

Notice board notice board cryptid factor notice board. Did you notice it? No, ah Yeah, all right, so notice board We talk about Upcoming events things that might be on There's a movie called the Meg which is out right now in the cinemas To sum it up. It's about a prehistoric shark. They are megalodon It stars Who's a star? It stars jason statham jason statham. That's right. Lee bing bing. Who Lee bing bing

Oh, okay. He's a chinese actress and singer. Um, oh cool. She looks awesome Rain, wilson is in it rain. Wilson, of course from the office. Oh, yes, the american office ruby rose and Cliff Curtis. He's all amazing names. Oh, wow. And by all accounts, it's not brilliant but you know, you can't expect much when you're making a Basically, uh, you know a jaws rehash, but it really is a cryptid movie I think if you're into monster movies, I think you're gonna really like it because it's got all those cliches all those fun moments those the horror moments of the Absolutely gigantic shark and uh,

Yeah, none of us have seen it. So I like to do a review of something I've never seen. Um That's out now Well, it's not a review, is it? It's a community notice. It's just a notice on the notice board. Yeah There's a strict no review policy on the notice board. Yeah. No, otherwise, I guess taken down Also in movie news slender man is coming out soon that is Oh Looks horrifically scary. It does and it is actually Usually the youth that think that they see this very skinny

Creature with very long appendages and it's the stuff stuff of horrors Uh, but the major news from the notice board this week guys is This game So that's cool. Osprey games have sent us each of us They've got three copies of this game called cryptid. It's called cryptid. It's a game by hell duncan and ruth viviers

and it's It's a board game about cryptids. Yay. That's so cool. So I'll just read what it says on the back You've studied the footage connected the dots and gathered what? miyaga me mea g re mega mega. It's not a word I use often I would say mega evidence you could you're close Soon the whole world will know the truth behind the cryptid and you will be the envy of cryptozoologists everywhere

In this unique deduction game of honest misdirection Players must try to uncover information about their opponent's clues while throwing them off the scent of their own Each player holds one piece of evidence to help them find the creature And we'll constantly try to eke out more information from their opponents Guard your clues carefully and you might make the discovery of your life. Wow This is a real proper big board game about cryptozoology That is awesome and look at the art on it. I know. It's so cool. It's beautiful. Well, so when do we get our ones? Are you?

Well, are you? Someone's gonna come to new york soon. Rosie's coming to new york. She'll give you your copy And hopefully when we pass through the uk soon because i'm heading to ireland. I will bring dan's copy. Oh great. Cool I can't wait to play that game. So that's thank you very much. That's a really osprey games I was just gonna say can I add one uh movie to the to the notice board? Yes Please do. It's a cryptid-esque movie. Um, Do I know do I mention this last week the last the last sharknado movies coming out? Oh, yes I have heard this advertised. Yes the last one

Brilliant. Well, it's the sixth and it's the last one and um, it looks it looks as you know Excitingly terrible and fun and awesome as as the previous ones But what I love most is its title because they've called it the last sharknado and it's tagline It's about time And so this is the sixth one Yeah, and I'll say one more thing about this is I think I read somewhere that the sharks, uh, they fight a T-rex or a dinosaur in this one. There's a fight between a t-rex and a shark Oh, so it's about time. So it's about so it's about time travel and it's about time. It is exactly. It's perfect

So clever. Oh, bro. And and all and we've done it again guys. Unfortunately. We've given out another great movie idea Oh That's that 50 50 gamble, isn't it as to whether those things have already been made or whether we've just Revealed some new info, but look that's it for the show. We've we've got the new notice board There's three movie options there. Um, there's a new board game Simply called cryptid can I just say the notice board as well listeners if you've Picked up on this send your products into the notice board

Three items. You'll get it mentioned on the notice board We'll get a free item. I'm just saying if anybody's If anybody's got a cryptid electric skateboard, they want us to review. I could I'm I'm quite I need an electric skateboard What what what do you need Reese Dan? Maybe you guys any well, whatever I need. I better not hold my breath together until Reese comes over to the UK I'm the point of contact so if if there is any Nick reduction leeches That you want to send us that'll be great and we can fix up our double chins and nicks

Trousers for buttons, maybe If anybody wants me to try out new trousers that keep you cool during hot weather Yeah, I'll try those out for you. We'll mention them on the notice board We could just call it sort of it's free being notice board You know what I've listened to a few other podcasts and they're very professional And I know I've had a few comments online of people going, you know If you want to make your your podcast more professional Come in, you know come and see us or whatever and we can do this and we can do that

I'm thinking, you know what really do we want to change our podcast from one where that is so shambolic Where the main guy who edit who edits the show sits there in his underwear during the entire time While his family are running around unpacking boxes of crap as he's caught between three countries Yeah, I don't think so and I think we've got it sussed, but thank you so much for all your Wonderful advice online, but this is and always will be and make sure you've got a good tractor plan to make this buttons The greatest crypto zoological paranormal radio show the world has ever seen I mean heard You