The Current - Jordan TooToo says life in North made him a better NHL player

Episode Date: December 30, 2025

Longtime Nashville Predator Jordin TooToo is the subject of a new documentary, highlighting life in the North, his struggle with substance abuse and how the serenity he felt on the land in Rankin Inlet was matched only by the peace he felt playing hockey.

With the Morial app, you can sharpen your French skills in no time. You'll have a blast learning with content from Radio Canada. It's easy as Arndor Trois. Learn French. Have fun. Repeat. Download the free Morial app now. This is a CBC podcast. Hello, I'm Matt Galloway, and this is the current podcast. When he was just 14 years old, Jordan Tutu left home.

He traveled thousands of kilometers from. Rankin Inlet Nunavut to Brandon Manitoba, just so he could come alive on the ice. Hockey's always been an escape for me, right? And I grew up with a lot of anger, and that's where I released it all on the ice. Jordan's career and the challenges he faced as the first Inuk player in the NHL from dealing with substance abuse and generational trauma are all part of a new documentary. Jordan's story is rooted in the north, a place where he says he still feels most free.

I spoke with Jordan 2-2 last November. Here's our conversation. Most people know you as a star enforcer while you played for four teams in the NHL. But this documentary, Jordan, shares a lot about your upbringing, the challenges you and your family have faced. Why did you want to share that part of your story?

Yeah, so hockey's been a part of my life, but my home has allowed me to really bring the true self in me out. And filming my documentary has really helped us heal as a family. You know, I'm sure a lot of indigenous families can relate non-indigenous families to my story. So it's been a whirlwind the last five years, but a lot of learning curves for me personally, a lot of growth and a lot of healing. It might be hard to put this in a sort of simple words,

but what does the North mean to you? How does that sit inside of you? Freedom, you know, I think that word really comes to my mind when I talk about home and the Arctic. And, you know, it's the one place throughout my NHL career that has allowed me to be grounded, you know, getting out on the land and just being in nature. It's been instilled in me since I was born. My father, Barney, was born and raised out on the land.

And he's really instilled that culture and traditional ways of the Inuit people in me and in my brother and my sister. And so it's, you know, throughout my NHL career, you know, the buzz and the fast-paced life, it tends to get to you. And every off-season, I always made a point of getting home for a few weeks and spending time out on the land away from devices, away from the screens, and just really grounded me. Recenters you. Yeah, absolutely.

Let's go back to Little Jordan. Why did you start playing hockey? My dad was a hockey player himself. apparently he was a pretty well-known player up in the north and he also had opportunities back in the day to go down and play pro but things didn't work out and so he instilled the sport of hockey in me and a lot of other kids in the north a lot of my buddies and when it's winter 10 months out of the year

you have ice it's a no-brainer you know so my story is uh you know i tell kids i you know i played basically pawn hockey till i was 14 years old and uh um ultimately it's how bad do you want it uh you know you don't need the best things yeah um you know i grew up using secondhand gear and uh you know whatever i can scrounge around and find i used and and uh you know to me It's about how bad do you want it in your heart? There, you know, I can imagine, as you say, played on a pond. And I think, you know, we can all counter up the same image in our head of up north

and playing on a pond and the beauty of the land and all those things. There's a moment in the documentary where you say the arena is like the land. And in my head, I can't square those two when I think of a hockey arena and the beauty of the north. You say they're like the land, beautiful and relentless. Draw that comparison. Yeah. So, you know, I think the one thing that,

is a little different, skating on a pond and in a hockey arena is a sound that you hear when you're outside. You know, I'm sure people who have skated on an outdoor pond can relate, you know, the sounds of the ice and the wind howling. You know, for me, when I played in the NHL and when I would walk down the tunnel, the dark tunnel, and as soon as I'd step on the ice, that's when the bright light. lights hit. And it was the same growing up as a kid. You know, I jump on my skidoo and as I'm driving out of town passing by these houses, you know, the chaos, the traumas. And I got on

the Hudson Bay. To me, that's where freedom began. And the bright lights began for me. You know, I was a inuk who was born and raised in a small community. As soon as I'd get on the Hudson Bay or on the outskirts of town, that's where I felt free. And, you know, because we as indigenous are most connected when we're out on the land. It is a place of hope, a place of healing. And so, yeah, like that, that can. comparison of, you know, playing in a stadium in front of 20,000 people.

Every time I get home in the springtime, you know, if we didn't go deep in the playoffs, I always brought my skates with me so I can rip it around out on the ice and just hear the sound of the ice crack and stuff. As you say, you come from a hockey family, and the documentary focuses on you and your relationship with your brother, Terence. he played hockey as well what role did Terence have in your decision

to pursue a career in the NHL He had a huge role You know he was He was my best friend He was my mentor He was my coach You know he was a guy that paved the way

And Through his actions And you know For me to be able to Keep his legacy on Throughout my journey You know, I, you know, without my brother, without his presence and his teachings, I probably wouldn't have made it.

So, yeah, a lot of life experiences where, you know, the hardships of growing up in the North and, you know, growing up in a dysfunctional home, It was a blessing in disguise, you know, for me to have an older brother. Your brother, Terrence, died by suicide when he was 22 years old back in 2002. And I'm sorry for that, Lost Jordan. In the documentary, he left you a note that's shown in the documentary, and it said, Jor, go all the way. It was him saying to you, keep pushing, keep going.

and effectively leave. Why do you think he was so adamant that you needed to leave? Well, you know, Terence was kind of the mediator in our family. And, you know, he saw a lot of things that I didn't see and he kind of shielded me from, you know, the, I guess, the chaos and dysfunction and all that stuff. But, you know, he, like I said, he paved the way for me and instilled, you know, the work ethic.

I, we as indigenous people, we learn by watching. And my brother was a guy who outworked everybody and didn't complain and just got the job done. So for me to be able to use his words that he left me, you know, George, go all the way, take care of the family, you are the matter. And I live by those words on a daily basis and, you know, for him to sacrifice and leave us way too soon, you know, those words are near and dear in my heart and will forever be a staple in the forefront of when I wake up every morning.

I'm sure you thought a lot about him the moment you were drafted into the NHL. What was that moment like? It was surreal, you know, who would I ever ever thought a kid from Rankin Island Nunavut would be drafted into the NHL, you know, leaving home at 14 years old, you know, and the trajectory of me getting drafted, you know, a lot of things happened within four years, you know, left home at 14 and next thing you know, and I'm drafted and off to the NHL. But that being said, you know, getting drafted is one thing. Making it is another thing and staying is another level. So a lot of the teachings my brother taught me the work ethic, you know, the grind. Surviving in the north is hard. So the mental aspect is probably the hardest part.

there's another element though Jordan for you it's not just making getting drafted making it staying having that staying power it's that you were first and you're always celebrated as that first the first in a player to play in the NHL being first comes with pressure as well right you have you want to uphold that standard how did that pressure play in total of that well you know at 20 years old when I cracked it into the NHL you don't really see that part you know i was still young and there was just a lot of buzz around you know being the first and and all that but i mean things happen so fast and uh you know when looking back now um i wish i would have absorbed more of it but you know like i said losing my brother um a year before making the NHL and, you know, a lot of things happened for me. So it was like a snowball effect and it was really hard for me to digest the whole situation. It wasn't probably until four or five years into my NHL career where I started understanding the impact I have on our people being the first and breaking those barriers.

And, you know, I don't ever consider myself better than anyone else. You know, I just put my head down and go to work. You know, that's just been instilled in me since I was a little kid. Survival mode. The Great Canadian Baking Show is back. Hello, beautiful bakers, and welcome to the tent. Ten contestants. On your marks.

Get set, bake. All hoping for the sweet smell of success. I am at the stage of Penny. I just got to say a little prayer. I mean heaven. Wow. I haven't even tasted it and I'm happy. I forgot to put in the eggs.

Damn. Anyone else on control will be shaking right now? It's a new season of the Great Canadian Baking Show. Watch free on CBC Gem. You talked about being from the North. People who play hockey and other sports, you know, they leave home often at these high, high levels. Leave home often when they're very young. They leave family, friends, community, loved ones behind, and they go elsewhere.

You're from a specific place that not many other kids are from who come down south and play hockey. So I want to play a clip from the documentary. This is your former teammate, Scotty Upschall. He's talking about you and your brother, Terrence, here. How else are you going to get out of Rankin Island? What else is going to bring you down to Alberta at 13, 14 years old? Is it going to be your education? Is it going to be, you know, because you're the best hunter in your, you know, in your village growing up?

Well, what else is going to get you down? These two guys fought there. on the ice to another place in Canada where, again, they were outsiders. Do you feel like an outsider? I did when I was at that age. You know, growing up in a community where you know everybody, life is pretty simple. You know, when I first moved to Edmonton, you know, having high-rise buildings, cars everywhere, streetlights.

There was a lot of things. It was a culture shock for me. And, you know, here's this Inuk boy living in the big city who basically was lost, but acted like I already knew the way of life. But there are many times where I'd call my brother and say, hey, I want to go home. You know, this is not for me. But he kept encouraging me and saying, hey, just trust me.

Stick it out. You want to stay. And looking back now, you know, he was the one that pushed me, knowing what I know now about, you know, our family dynamics and, you know, the alcoholism and the chaos and all that. He was shielding me from that. And he kept telling me, you know, just stick it out. You know, I believe in you.

Let's talk about the playing on the ice. for a bit and we'll get back to what you're just talking about there in just a moment. So let's play another clip. This is from fellow NHL player Brian McGratton. He's talking about a role you both shared, him on the Calgary Flames and you on the Predators. The hockey enforcing role, the fighter role in hockey is the hardest position in the history of the sport. The hardest. There is not a position in any sport that will ever be as hard as that.

the day-to-day stress and mental health effects it has on us preparing for those fights. It's not easy. Jordan Chutu, did that enforcer role, that mentality, that it's not easy. Was that natural for you? Yeah. I mean, I grew up in a survival fighting mentality. You know, as a young kid having an older brother who, you know, three years older than me, I always wanted to hang out with him and his buddies.

And, you know, the trade-off was, hey, we're going to treat you like your our age. And, you know, if you want to hang with the big boys, you're going to have to step up. And, you know, my brother always protected me, but also, you know, allowed me to find my own game. And that, for me, was the physical toughness, you know, because my brother, and his buddies would always dare me to do crazy things out on the ice, you know, run and smash into the boards a hundred miles an hour and, you know, and little things like that.

And, you know, because a lot of guys in the NHL that I played with my teammates would be like, man, too, it's like, how do you go up against these guys that are six foot four, 230 pounds, and you're only five foot eight? You know, I'd tell my teammates, I'm like, you know, when you grow up in the Arctic and you're out on the land and it's pitch black. And you come across a polar bear, you know, you overcome those kind of fears as a young kid. And, you know, I tell my teammates, like,

what's a 6'4, 230-pound guy going to do to me, you know? Compared to a polar bear? Compared to a polar bear or a pack of wolves or a wolverine. So as a young kid, like my job from the age of 12 to 14, I got up every morning and I shoveled snow in pure darkness, minus 40, minus 50. You know, I'd have to go outside and start the skidoo. And so walking to these buildings, not knowing what was around the corner, it taught me to overcome fear.

And Jordan, a tough life at home too, right? Not just the larger environment of growing up in the north. And how did that help you be the enforcer? Yeah, you know, looking back now, knowing my parents' story, has allowed me to show more compassion. But that being said, I didn't know their story. So as a lot of people in the north, you know, there's a lot of trauma.

History speaks for itself for our people. And so, yeah, it was tough. But I'm grateful for all those life experiences because it's made me who I am today. I choose to learn from those hardships and move forward. Whereas, you know, a lot of people tend to hold on to those, you know, moments of hardships and use them as a tool to say, hey, well, it's okay if I use, you know, alcohol or substances to numb the pain.

And I got caught up in that. And so, you know, you see a lot of our people struggling because of, history. In 2010, you took time away from the predators to go to rehab to address your alcohol abuse. You've been sober since. Congratulations on that. How did that change who you were on the ice? That experience of playing the game for seven years you spent in the NHL after becoming sober. Yeah, I mean, I grew up in a home where men don't show weakness, men don't surrender, men don't show emotion.

and so the hardest thing for a lot of men is to admit and to surrender because in a lot of our communities that's showing people you're weak and looking back it's the greatest decision that I had ever made in my life because I probably wouldn't be here today if I didn't accept a gift that was offered. We talked about the land and the importance of that to you at the beginning of our conversation. Did that help as well?

Absolutely. You know, like I said earlier, for us indigenous people, the land is where we feel safe. The land is where we are most connected to our ancestors. It's a place of healing. It's a place of hope. and so throughout my sobriety

getting out in the bush or out on the land in the north is healing and it's about simplicity right you know kids nowadays think it's hard if you don't have Wi-Fi service

you know and I tell these kids go talk to your elders you know you want to talk about hardships and survival mode, speak to your elders, speak to your knowledge keepers in your communities because we should be grateful for where we're at in today's society. But also learn and educate yourself. There's a moment in my documentary

where I speak to people about the labeling, you know, people put on our people when you see them out in public. go educate yourself open a textbook learn about the history you know we don't we're not here to ask for pity or or you know but at the same time it's we got to come to a common ground in order for us to move forward but as in a as a enuk who lived it um life's all about choices and uh i chose to move forward and like I said I don't consider myself better than any of our people it's the mindset and you know I am grateful for where I'm at today so when you go home and there's a young boy or girl you come home like a rock star like a superstar you might not think of yourself that way but I know what happens

when you go up there the whisper star Jordan's back home Jordan's back home and a kid says you hey Jordan like I want to I want to be you I want to be like you I want to get out of this town. I want to go make it big, whether it's in hockey or anything else. What do you say to that kid? Be the best version of yourself. You know, there's always people you can look up to and and I think I tell a lot of our youngsters who grew up in remote communities to go out and experience life. Get out of your town. Homes going to be home no matter where you go in life. and, you know, go experience those hardships, you know, because life ain't easy. You know, in our communities, life becomes pretty stagnant.

And a lot of our people refer to as, you know, res life. And I look at it as, that's a choice. You know, you want to live res life, the stagnant life, that's on you. You know, I chose to leave and to pursue my dreams. because, you know, when you grow up in a small town, you know everybody and you know what every day is going to bring. You know, I leaped in with two feet not knowing what my future will hold, and here we are today, you know, what is it, 25 years later.

But that's life. You know, I tell our kids, believe, in yourself I believe in you and that's all I needed to hear as a youngster your documentary is so much also about educating people who are not from the north

as well what do you want us to all understand about the story of Jordan 2 too yeah you know my story just one you know we all fight a fight no one knows about and you know I want men in our communities

to feel comfortable and content in their own body. And, you know, it was really hard for me to admit I had a problem and to surrender and to say, yes, I need help. It took a lot of thinking, you know, internal thinking. You know, what are people going to think? You know, I'm a tough guy in the NHL. And, you know, now I'm going to go and get help. You know, that's, to me, when I, at that age, I felt like, oh, people are going to think I'm weak.

But ultimately, I encourage men in our communities to put pen to paper. And, you know, because we all, we're all treading water. You know, we all have history. And, yes, there's a lot of things in my life that I'm ashamed of. but I choose to learn from those mistakes that I made and allow myself to grow and evolve. And people got to realize that, you know, people change. There's a lot to be proud of as well in your life.

And I appreciate you sharing your story with us. Thank you very much. My pleasure. Jordan Tutu is a former player in the NHL. The new documentary is called Tutu and it is out now. You've been listening to the current podcast. My name is Matt Galloway. Thanks for listening. I'll talk to you soon. For more CBC podcasts, go to cBC.ca slash podcasts.