The Current - This woman is grieving her dad through his 10,000 records

Episode Date: January 31, 2025

Jula inherited 10,000 vinyl records from her dad when he died. Now, she’s listening through them to make sense of her grief — and sharing that connection to her father with millions of people on her social media account @soundwavesoffwax.

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This is a CBC Podcast. Hello, I'm Matt Galloway and this is The Current Podcast. When someone close to you dies, part of the grieving process is being reminded of them, sometimes in the most mundane ways. Maybe it's smelling one of their favorite foods. Maybe it's seeing a film you saw together or hearing a song that takes you back to them and the times you shared.

Welcome to another day of listening to my late father's record collection. What are we gonna listen to today? I picked one that I really associate with my father, the monkeys. Hey, hey, we're the monkeys. And people say we're monkey around. My favorite song off of this album would be the first song, the theme from The Monkees. It's by far not the best song of the album, but growing up I used to always watch The

Monkees TV show with my father, but as I'm listening I can truly just imagine the title screen from the TV show. But it's a fun, energetic, carefree song with that classic guitar solo, cheery in the middle section. This is Yula. We're only using her first name because she worries about her name and location being shared online. A few years ago, her dad died. And one of the many things they shared

was a love of music. Yula inherited her dad's record collection, 10,000 vinyl albums. She is listening her way through it. Every day she pulls an album from the shelves and shares the music and her short reviews on TikTok and Instagram. With a combined audience

of more than half a million followers, it seems that her listening project has struck a chord. Youla, good morning. Good morning. I'm sorry to hear about your dad. Thank you. This is such a neat project and one of the reasons that we wanted to talk to you was about what it tells us about you and about your dad and about the connection that music

can have and about the things that people leave when they die. Tell me a little bit about your father and who he was. My father's name was Richard. He was a English literature teacher and an accordion player, as well as a shy singer-songwriter. He played accordion in like the Polish Hall. Yes, that's correct.

Tell me a little bit about the connection that you had with him over music. Yeah, he loved music. He was probably like the biggest music lover to this day I've ever met. He was a big collector of vinyl and CDs. He was always listening to something and almost every single memory I have of him somehow either has music in the background and anytime he played anything, he would describe to you what you're listening to, tell you backstory over what you're listening to. He was obsessed. Do you remember when that started? Do you remember like the first memory that you have

of him where there was music kind of in the air? There's so many. I have so many memories of just playing, like playing with my dolls. If he was there, he would be sitting there playing his guitar while I was playing with my dolls. So I have a lot of memories of him actually singing his own music to me. I have a lot of memories of him playing a vinyl or a CD while I'm playing and, or we would go for a walks and we would play this game where he would tell me to say a word and he would, he would tell me a song that has that word in it. And he was really, he could say any word and somehow he knew a song that had that word in it. And he was really, you could say any word and somehow he knew a song that had that word in it.

Like, do you remember an example of that? Oh, I can't remember what the song was, but he was, he would, sometimes he would like prompt you, he'd be like, say like, say like, like printer. And then, okay, printer. And then he would just, I don't know, he would just go off. I can't remember exactly. And he had a huge collection. Yeah, he had a huge collection. He also had a CD collection, but he had a really big CD collection as well, but I didn't get the CDs. So how did this start for you?

I mean, he dies, you inherit this collection, and then you try to figure out what to do with it. And one of the things that you do is you start to listen to it, but then you start to post those listening sessions online. How did that start? Yeah, it was actually a kind of slow process after he passed. I was the one in the family who got to have the records. And it took me a while before I even wanted to be in the same room as them. Actually, I just moved back into my family home, which is where the records are living.

And when I moved back, I put my bed into the room with the records, because it was the nicest room with the most sunlight. And so every day I was just confronted with them. And this started in April. And I just started to slowly listen to them as just part of my morning routine. And one day I had a friend over and we were listening to the records and I was talking to her about how much I miss having a dialogue about music and how much I miss just like playing, because this was my father's music, so how much I miss like listening to his music and then hearing about it or talking about it with him

and how that's been really obviously gone from my life. And my friend made the suggestion that I should post about it online. She was like, that's what social media is for. Like, I'm sure you'll find at least 20 people who also like this music. You're, you know, they'll talk to you about it. That's what people use social media for. So then in September I just made a video and posted online and it blew up. More than 20 people watched it.

Yeah, it was really fast. Like something like 14 million people have seen that video? Yeah, I was like sitting there, I was so embarrassed when I first posted it, I like blocked people that I knew from my life and I just like asked my closest friends, I was like, could you like my video? Could you follow me? And by like a couple hours, I had over 10,000 followers. Can I go back to something that you said earlier,

which is that you had moved your bed into that room where the records were, and that you were confronted with them. What were you, I mean, they're physical things, but there's something more than that, right? What were were confronted with them. What were you, I mean, they're physical things, but there's something more than that, right? What were you confronted with? Yeah, there was a lot. Obviously I was confronted with his loss.

Actually, quite after he passed away, I moved out of the house just to go to university, but I hadn't been in that room or in that space for a while. When I would come home to visit, I would never go into that room. And sometimes we would talk about it, like, you know, what are you gonna do with the records? Everybody was always saying, like,

you can sell them if you want to, or you can just go through them and pick the ones that are your favorite. So when I was in that room, there was just like a big, even though they took up so much space and they were so big, it felt like a big loss and not a gain. And then also just I didn't know what to do with them. I knew how much my father had loved them and I was thinking how they take up so much space or why did I inherit this? Do I even want to listen to them?

It was just a slow process of just being like, okay, maybe I can begin by listening to a record in here that I know and I don't associate with him, and I've listened to in my own life. I listened to a lot of my mom's favorite albums from there. Then one day I just pulled a random one and started listening to it and was actually surprisingly really comforted by that experience. What was the first one that you pulled out?

I don't remember exactly. I think it was The Hollies. It was like a Hollies album. I had listened to like the title, the Hollies one, but it was some random Hollies album, I think. And all of this is the stuff that you didn't know before? Like you're discovering this as you're kind of pulling the records out of the stacks? Yeah, some of them I've known, like or sometimes I know the artists,

but I've never listened to the whole album. I'll just know their hits. And sometimes they're just really deep cuts for me that I have no clue where they even come from. You're about a hundred records into his collection now. Tell me about Paul Simon. My father loved, loved, loved, loved Paul Simon. I actually still have some of his t-shirts that have Paul Simon's face on them.

He loved it. He thought Paul Simon was one of the greatest, or is one of the greatest songwriters of all time. He would actually get into these really big discussions with my mom, because my mom's a big Leonard Cohen fan. So I have a lot of memories of him playing Paul Simon and my mom being like, no, no, Leonard Cohen's better. And they would talk and would both like read books of their respected singer songwriter and just kind of share facts with each other and songs. I remember listening to Graceland a lot with him. Just like such a, I remember even like, I think dancing to that record with him

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He was also a huge Burton Cummings fan. Yes, a big Burton Cummings fan. He told everybody that he was the biggest Burton Cummings fan. Why do you think he loved Burton Cummings so much? I know he really resonated with Burton Cummings life. I know Burton didn't have a very good relationship with his father, and my father really resonated with a lot of the lyrics, a lot of his sadness that he was going through, really aligned with Burton's. So he felt like Burton Cummings was his friend. And he'd seen him in concert, right?

I mean, what is the story about this photo that was in one of the Burton Cummings records? Oh, yeah, he saw him in concert, right? I mean, what is the story about this photo that was in one of the Burton Cummings records? Oh yeah, he saw him in concert every time he had a chance. I think, I'm sure I've even seen Burton Cummings. My mom and I were laughing about this, about how she's like, I don't know, she's like, I think I've gone to at least 10 Burton Cummings concerts.

Yeah, he loved him. Are there records, I mean, 10,000 records is a lot. And there are things that you might know and there are things that you don't know. In pulling things out, are there albums that you've been surprised by? Something that you'd never heard of before, you didn't know anything about, but you pull it out and you put it on the turntable and, and we're surprised by. Yeah, there's a lot. I would say almost any time I listen to a record,

I'm surprised by it in one way or another. Even I did Zamfere, the Pan flute guy, and I didn't know he was such a, an icon at the time. So I was listening to it and I was like, hmm, this is like a strange record for, to be in his collection. And all of my commenters were like, this was such a big album, it used to sell on TV. Even just like the little facts about records

can also be super surprising. Something like a Pan flute album, I would never think would be so iconic in the mainstream. It was a big deal. Yeah. It was a big deal. Did you know it?

Yeah, but I don't know that I had the record, but I knew of the record. Okay. Yeah. Did you see the TV commercials for it? That's probably where I saw it. Yeah, I'm of the age where they would be advertising it on television. Maybe, is that where your dad got it?

He saw the TV commercials and bought it? I'm not sure. That's just what all my commenters were saying. They were like, I'm sick of this commercial back in the day. It sounds like he has pretty eclectic tastes though. I mean, from Zamfier to the Jazz Butcher to Burton Cummings. There's a lot that's in there, right? Yeah, there's a lot. There's also some orchestral, but I kind of stay away from that right now.

You'll get there eventually. Yeah, maybe when my verbs get better at describing music. What have you learned about your dad in doing a project like this? I just learned just the depth of his, I mean, I always knew he loved music, but the depth of that goes much further in just how eclectic the taste is. I learned about maybe how much even cooler he is than I had thought. Maybe when I started to get a little bit older, I would kind of judge his music taste as I got into more underground or experimental music.

I thought he listened to too much conventional music. But I have been... It turned out your dad was pretty cool. Yeah, I've been debunked on that theory. Has it... I mean, we were saying earlier that grief is such an unusual thing because it's not linear. It's also not something that you can predict where it's going to come from and how you're going to deal with it.

And people deal with it in any number of different ways. But having access to him through this record collection, has that helped you in dealing with grief? Yes, absolutely. This whole project for me has, in a really nice way, made me deal with my grief maybe for the first time in the happiest way. I feel like my project that I'm doing right now is in service and for him and with him.

I think any music lover who spent their life so dedicated, thinking, listening, and making music would be so honored for somebody to share their music collection. He always wanted to be a disc jockey, so in a way, I'm like, kind of like the modern-day social media sharing music in that way. I think this would make him so proud and honored. And this has made me tremendously deal with my grief because I feel like I'm doing something

for him and with him even after his passing. But you're not doing it in isolation. I mean, I mentioned that 14 million people saw that first video. There's a lot of people who've been following along as you're doing this, as you're making your way through the collection. Why do you think this has struck such a chord with people? Why do I think? I'm kind of shocked even still that it's struck such a chord even though I'm talking to people and getting comments.

It's still kind of, maybe because it's me, but people, I think a lot of people deal, like have inherited their parents collection or they associate music with their families or their friends. I think music really can capture a time in our lives and listening to things, bring that back for us. A lot of people also have their own music collection and watching somebody who's much younger than them talk about the music that they grew up listening to is very fun. And that, you know, I think the temporality of life in contrast with these vinyl records, it's like kind of freezing time in a way that is much more poetic than I had thought.

Do you like the fact that, I mean, again, this is a collective sort of experience. It feels like you're sitting down with a bunch of other people, they're in rooms all around the world and you're listening to the same record together. Yeah, absolutely. My comment section and my DMs are so much fun to read. I get a lot of my friends tell me how much they enjoy just like reading my comment section. Like your videos are great, Yula, but reading the comment section is so fun. People are really there listening with me. Like your videos are great, Yula, but reading the comment section is so fun. People are really there listening with me.

And I feel like beyond the videos, I feel like I've created like a little bit of an online album of the day listening party. And that's been such a treat for me and I think for my viewers as well. Yeah, it's really sweet to see how much people are engaging and continuing that dialogue with me. You have a 10,000 record collection to make your way through. How many records have you listened to so far? I think almost 150 that I've documented.

And how are you, like, are you starting at A and going through Z or are you just kind of picking things randomly out of the pile? how are you, like are you starting at A and going through Z, or are you just kind of picking things randomly out of the pile? How are you doing this? I'm just picking things randomly. I have a little bit of a system to know which ones I've already listened to.

So now I'm just kind of seeing where I haven't, where has more gaps, but just random. What are you looking forward to? I mean, you have a lot of listening still to go. Yeah. What am I looking forward to listen to? Yeah. And as this whole project, because it's not just listening now,

it's something even larger than that, right? Yeah, exactly. For listening, I think I'm excited to when I find like a local band. I'm sure there's one that's in the collection, but to find something from my city that he picked up would be fun, I haven't seen anything like that yet. Then for my project, I'm not sure, I'm just enjoying this process

and everything's still pretty new for me. So just listening every day and being incredibly grateful to everybody who's listening along with me. You said something earlier that your dad would be proud of you. Yes, yes, he would be so proud of me. I think he's like dancing and it feels like in a way, he collected all of these records for me.

That's a nice experience. I mean, having gone through something as hard as losing your dad, it's nice to know that in some ways he's still there in that stack of records. Yeah, exactly. He's there when I'm talking about the records, when I'm listening to them, and just in that space with me every single day. And it's not something I have to avoid anymore. Thanks for taking us along on this journey with you.

And thanks for talking to us about what you've learned about your dad and about the music that he loved. Yula, thank you. Thank you as well. Yula is in Alberta, and you can join her listening parties at Soundwaves Off W wax on Instagram and TikTok. This is a story about music, but it's also a story about the things we leave behind and how the people

we love can find their way to us through those things that we leave behind after we die. If there's, if there's an object, maybe it's a piece of music or maybe just an object that you have inherited that reminds you of a person in your life. Tell us about it. You can send us those stories or those memories

to thecurrentatcbc.ca. And again, it can be a piece of music, it can be something smaller than that, larger than that, but it's about how the physical object in some ways is a portal to that person that left you that object. Again, email us, thecurrent at cbc.ca. For more CBC podcasts, go to cbc.ca slash podcasts.