The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Al Franken Unpacks The U.N. Climate Report | Alan Ruck

Episode Date: March 22, 2023

Al Franken tackles the biggest stories of the day including New York's new slogan and logo, Putin and Xi Jinping shaking hands, France's new retirement age, the Tucker Carlson producer suing Fox News, and the U.N.'s latest catastrophic climate change report. Star of HBO’s Succession, Alan Ruck discusses the show’s widely-anticipated final seasonSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to the, welcome to the Daily Show, I'm Al Franken and it's Tuesday, which is the day true, I'm Al Franken and it's Tuesday which is the day Trump told us, he was going to be arrested, which it turns out didn't happen, so that's the last time I believe something that guy says. We've got a great show for you tonight, and let's get right into the headlines. Let's begin right here in New York City, the greatest city in the world. It's changing right here in New York City, the greatest city in the world. It's changing its pronouns. The iconic I Love New York logo is getting a makeover. The new campaign we love New York City launched by officials to help the city rebound

from the pandemic. Designers keeping the big red hard, but switching up the font a little bit. Mayor Adams and Governor Hockel on hand in Times Square to unveil the new logo with with the help of Broadway stars and community leaders. No one will ever beat New Yorkers down. And we took the I out of I Love New York and we brought the we. We're in this together. That's right.

It's not I anymore. It's we. As in, we can't afford rent. Or we just got pushed in front of the subway. Or we just pushed someone in front of the subway. Or we just pushed someone in front of the subway. But if you're wondering how they got this incredible new slogan, I actually have some of the runners up here. Let's see. Some of the other options were, we love Jew York. Okay. Jew York. J Jew York. Start spreading the Jews. And then they told Kanye to leave the meeting.

And that's when they settled on, we love New York City. Now let's move on to a story that's very sad for those of us who love Fox News because it turns out that a producer for Tucker Carlson is suing the network saying that the network pressured her to lie in the Dominion Voting Machines lawsuit and I actually wasn't surprised about this at all because all the way back 20 years ago I wrote a book about Fox News called Lies in the Lying Liars who tell them a fair and balanced look at the right and in fact, I wanted to treat you guys tonight.

So look, all of you, look under your seats and you'll find directions to a local bookstore where you can buy, you can buy lies for 2999. Okay, let's move on to international news this week. Vladimir Putin is hosting Chinese president Xi Jinping for a three-day summit in Moscow and a lot of people are upset with Xi for cosing up to Putin after he's become an international pariah. But you know what? I think that that is exactly the time when you really find out who your friends are. We should all be so lucky to have a friend like President Shee, who doesn't judge us for every little crime against humanity.

In other overseas news, there was a big win for workers in France who will now get to work longer than ever. Despite weeks of protest from lazy French people who wanted to keep the retirement age in 62, the government has now raised the age at which workers can retire with a pension to 64. And this is terrible news because it's leading to a revolution in France. And last time that happened, we all had to listen to Russell Crow sing showtunes. So fix this right now, France. And I'm sorry, but I have no patience for people who need to stop working in their early

sixes. I'm 71 and I'm working. And I'm working. And I, and I haven't lost a step feet. I'm as sharp as I was when I started on Saturday Night Live. I haven't lost a step since then and that was back in 1975. Nearly 20, 40... You long? Decades. and that was back in 1975, nearly 40, 40, long, decades. But let's get to the story today that makes...

Let's get to the story today that makes... Let's get to the story today that makes all the other stories kind of pointless. According to the UN, we're all going to die. Just into CNN, a dire warning about the state of the planet. The new UN report warns the climate time bomb is ticking and the world is running out of time to avoid catastrophe. This report tells us we need a quantum leap in climate action. And every country in the world has to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the world to the world the world to the world the world to the world to the world the world the world to the world to the world to the world to to the world to the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world the world their all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. to c. to c. to c. to c. to c. to c. to c. to to too. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. Wea. We're the the the the to the the to to the the th. try. try. tells us we need a quantum leap in climate action, and every country in the world has to reduce emissions at warp speed to try to curb the warming of our planet.

We are nowhere close to making that Paris Agreement goal of curbing warming to 1.5 degrees Celsius from pre-industrial levels. To accomplish all of it, developed and the richest nations in the world would need to reach net zero by 2040. That is going to be nearly impossible. Wow, that's awful. But I guess a shout out to my baby boomers feels like we got the last chopper out of Saigon, doesn't it?

And that's a reference we baby boomers understand. Now, part of the problem is the UN's expectation of collective action. It's just easy to shirk your part when everybody has to chip in. So the solution here is to call out people individually. The next UN report shouldn't say we all must lower our emissions. It should say, Gary, stop driving your car so much. You don't need to visit your wife's grave every day. She's not keeping track.

The fact is, on our current path, we're in for a grim future. And find out just how grim. Let's go to the future to talk to Desi Lydick. Hi Al, yes. I am reporting from the year 2075. Can you believe it? this face is 93. Take that, Paul Rudd. I'm afraid to ask, but how is the climate crisis going 60 years from now? Climate crisis, we saw that years ago.

Look, the entire world looks like a Lisa Frank folder. Hold on, we fixed climate change? How did that happen? Well, it started when the UN issued its report on March 20th, 2023. Warning that we had to radically reduce carbon emissions by 2040. So we read the report and we made all the changes and saved the world. Back to you, Al. Wait, wait, you're talking about the report from yesterday. Yeah, it laid out exactly what we needed to do, so everyone just came together and did it.

Why wouldn't we? Why wouldn't we? Well, wasn't doing all that really expensive? Oh, yeah, definitely was. But the alternative was the destruction of the planet. So of course, we just spent the money, obviously. Back to you, Al. I can't believe it.

Everything sounds so great in the future. Oh, it sure is. Oh, hi, little guy. A grassland sparrow? I thought those were going extinct. Oh, they were, but we turned it around. We reforested the Amazon. We got all the plastic out of the ocean.

And upcycled it into friendship bracelets that we all wear unironically. Plus all the children in the world joined hands and sang in a harmony so beautiful it ended war forever. Wow, holy crap, really all that happened? Oh my god, no! You dumbed? I'm being sarcastic. You all that happened? Oh my God, no! You dumb, dumb, dumb? I'm being sarcastic.

You think that for some reason we're going to suddenly start listening to UN climate reports? No. El, I'm not from the future. This is all fake. I am literally in the same room as you right now. I'm so, I'm so stupid. I just didn't realize that. I mean I did I just didn't realize that. Yeah, I hate to say it but we're just going to keep on driving forward expeditions and burning fossil fuels until the ocean swallows us whole. Oh, well, I guess you're right, Desi, and you know, that's our satirical point. If only satire had the power to change the future for the better.

Well, Al, I mean, the good news is there's still a chance that our sharp-witted satire will inspire people to make the necessary changes to save our planet. Wow, really? No, oh my God! I'm being sarcastic! Jesus Christ, were you really a senator? Yes, yes I was. Desilightek everyone.

All right, when we come back, I'm going to dig around in your trash, so don't go away. Welcome back to the daily show coming to you from fabulous New York City. New York is a city of superlatives. New York is a city of superlatives, bigest, bigest, tallest, richest, most Dwayne-reediest. But because so many people live in New York, a city of superlatives, biggest, tallest, richest, most Dwayne-readiest, but because so many people live in New York, it's also the trashiest city in the U.S. So recently I decided to try and answer a very basic question. Do you ever wonder where your garbage actually goes? As a New Yorker, I've always kind of assumed that it was taken

away by some garbage ferry after I put it outside my apartment. Well, it turns out that's not the case. In fact, I don't know what happens to it, so I'm here at the 91st Street transfer station to find out. My guide is Jessica Tish, New York's 41st Commissioner of Sanitation. A lifelong New Yorker with only three Harvard degrees. Tish formerly held high-ranking positions in both the city administration and the police department, and all that has led her to this. Wow, that is, that's a lot of trash. Yeah, no, this isn't a lot of trash for us. It's probably less than 500,000 pounds of it.

This is what you wanted to do. Yeah, a girl can dream. There it is. It was desperate to run sanitation. Why did you want this? Because sanitation is the essential service. Every day New Yorkers leave 24 million pounds of trash and recycling. 24 million pounds. We don't do our job for one day. Yeah. Everyone in New York City notices. If we don't do our jobs for two or three days, that's a public health

crisis. Commissioner Tish has already been a dynamo of innovation, bringing new ideas and a breath of fresh air to Gotham's Piles of Garbage. We announced this week that we're changing the set out times for trash to 8 p.m. This week the Department of Sanitation launched its first all-burrow composting program. The biggest swing that you can take at cleaning up our streets is to shut down the all night all you can eat rat buffet. Tell me about because you have been associated with the word rat and rats because you said something that went viral. The rats don't run the city, we do. Rats don't run the city, we do.

We do. We do. And I think I went viral. I think I went viral. Jesse Tish took it to the rats. The idea is one-third of the material in these black bags is food. As we're trying to take the food, compost it and create soil. Now the rats won't like that.

The rats will hate that. But the rats don't like that. The rats will hate that. But the rats don't run the city. We do. Yeah. All right, look out. The talks is coming. I think it, you know what? This would be really... No, no, no, we have to go. Let's go. This is mine. Let's go. Okay. Watch out. I'm stepping in cabbage. There it is! Woo! Isn't it amazing? Holy moly.

How much is it? Oh, from here the trash is loaded into containers and put on barges, then makes a stop at Staten Island. Hey, yo, what are you, gooops? But not even trash wants to stay there, so then it shuffles off the buffalo by rail, where it's burned to generate electricity. Look at that. What's that?

That's scrappy. Our composting mascot. Can you come over here? Um, I've got a bone to pick with you. You clearly model scrappy after me. The glasses, the teeth, the kind of the juffro. What about the eyebrows? Those are my eyebrows! Exactly, you should be flattered. It's our composting mascot.

I'm modern, thank you. Thank you, Scrappy. Okay, go away. So far, I've learned that I'm a composting bin, that trash travels more than I do, and that I don't have to bring my own garbage bag to the transfer station. And that's thanks to New York's unsung heroes, the trash collectors, like Nick. All right, next stop. Who let me ride along his night shift through Manhattan's Westville. All right, all right, let's get ready to roll. The quicker we get it done, the quicker the rats don't have food. You want to know something?

The rats don't run the city. That's true, yes. Correct, they don't. We run the city. What about this thing about just the trash not being out? their trash not being out? Because, you know what, I guess sanitation has been doing it for 70, 80 years, putting it out at 4 p.m. sits on for 16 hours. Yeah.

It does make sense. To put it out at 8 p.m. Less time on the street, less rats. It was going to be a long night. I wondered if I was ever going to make it as a garbage here. Hey, I'm working here. Hey, we're picking up garbage here. We're picking up garbage here, okay? We're gonna move, but we're picking up garbage here. Pahhh.

P'n'foll turns out, it was natural. You're doing it wrong. Okay. It's too heavy. Your back's gonna go out. Jesus Christ. Hey, this is easy. You ever spend three hours trying to

write a joke and not be able to? Oh, no, okay. Not. This is nothing. All right, let him got another 10 blocks to go. Okay, you know, I think you guys are fine without me. And so, uh, can you give me a lift home? I'm on the up west side. You want to go on the back home. Even though Nick refused to give me a ride home, I knew it was because he had something much more important to do. Keep our streets clean. After all, this is New York City. We all need to work together with mutual respect to do all. Fn't you! A big thank you to Commissioner Jessica Tish, Nick and Tommy and everyone at the Department of Sanitation. You people are amazing. We'll be right back with successions, Alan Ruck,

right after this. Welcome back to the Welcome back to the Show. My guest tonight is a wonderful actor who plays Connor Roy on the Emmy Award-winning HBO series, Succession. Please welcome Alan Ruck. Hello, Senator. Hello, somehow you got a bigger welcome than Lindsay Graham last night. I don't know how that happened. I love the show. My wife and I watch it every Sunday night. Hello, somehow you got a bigger welcome than Lindsay Graham last night. I don't know how that happened. I love the show. My wife and I watch it every Sunday night.

We're looking bored to Sunday for the show. My wife and I watch it every Sunday night and we're looking bored of Sunday for the premiere. Now this is the saga of the Roy family. Yeah. And Connor is the oldest son. And you are maybe the least accomplished? It's safe to say that yeah okay and i know this is going to be the last season right yes yes yes so how does it end i can't do it not not even for you I'm sorry can't do it okay well you're uh... you're uh... you see that that clip you're running for president

yes i am okay so you can't that clip, you're running for president? Yes, I am. Okay, so you can't tell us whether or not you win. No, but I'm working that 1% man. I mean, that's leverage. Okay. It might have been a tip off that maybe you don't, but you never know. Things get weird, right? It's a crazy show. It's surprising. yeah, you can't outguess Jesse Armstrong, so, yeah. He's the, he's our creator and head writer, yes.

Yeah, and I heard him interviewed and he said that, uh, that your father in the series, Logan Roy, has said that, uh said that he loves all his children. Brian Cox has said that, right? Really? I mean, that's amazing to me. I think as much as Logan is capable of loving anything, he does love his children. He's just bitterly disappointed in all of them. I think so.

Especially you, don't you think? Well, yeah, they make me stand to the back of the picture whenever there's a photo. Because you're the oldest son and... Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a sad little history. You know, he probably divorced my mother when I was about eight, and I lived with her for 10 years, and she was in and out of mental institutions, and I was in and out of boarding schools.

And I didn't see my father for three or four years. So it wasn't, it was like Dickens, I think, you know. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. So, okay, in... You still got it, man. So, in the campaign... And so do you. So, in the campaign, you're running for president, there is a, uh, something interesting about your marriage.

Oh, yes. Specifically, something you about your marriage. Oh yes. Specifically, something you want to talk about? Not if you don't. Well, sure, sure. Yes, my, Willa was at one point a professional escort. And then I convinced, No, I mean, you know, you got to make a living. And I convinced her to have me be her exclusive client and maybe against her better judgment.

She's actually developed some affection for me. I wouldn't say she's in love, but she's become protective of me over these services. And you have her, you produced a play for her that she wrote? Sands, it was called. Sands, about a woman who's trapped in the desert by an evil king. That sounds like it could be really good. Yeah. Evidently not. It didn't get good reviews. No, no, we got slammed. I remember the scene where she throws

the iPad off the yacht. Yeah yeah she was she was having a day. Yeah. So okay so the show it's it's going off the air. Yeah that must you must it looks like you guys to the try to the the the show it's going off the air. Yeah that must you must you the that the that. thou th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the the thi. the the thi. the the the thi. the the the the th. the the th. th. th. th. the. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. the the th. I. the the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. the th. the the th. I. the th. th. I. the. I. I. the. I. I. I. th. I. th. I. th. I. th. I. th. th. I. th. I. th. I. I. th. the. the. I. the air. Yeah. That must, you must, it looks like you guys love each other. You guys love working with each other. I've never seen, it looks like a tremendous amount of fun. It's a brutal, brutal, emotional show, but it's also quite funny. Yeah, it is, it's wickedly funny. And I think something that helps it along is that all the actors are wonderfully, they're just wonderful intelligent, kind-hearted people that are playing all these bastards you know so it adds something to it that you can't

help but like them even though they're miserable human beings and I love I am going to miss everybody terribly but I think Jesse's smart to end it on this high note. Yeah. Sometimes things run their course, but I just, I'm going to miss saying it, but I can't wait this, it's Sunday, is when it starts. So it starts this Sunday. Yeah, coming up. Does somebody end up getting the leadership of the company?

Because a lot of this has been all about one of the successions yeah succession yeah succession yeah I can just that's nice Jeff Benny of course yeah I can just say that someone does wow okay that's that's good to know yeah no no no no to thou to thou to thou? Now having gone through that someone does. Wow, okay, that's good to know. Now, having gone through this, do you have any, have you developed any kind of sympathy for like Rupert Murdoch's family? I guess I would be the prudence. I guess that's his oldest, his eldest is prudence. Isn't that right? I think so, yes. Don't ask me. Okay, I'm sorry.

But I don't really feel sorry for these people at the very top of the food chain, but they do have to do things that we don't. Like if you fall in love with somebody, you just get to marry them or be with them, you know? These people need to be vetted by the family. And if you pick the wrong person, they just say, no, no. Can't have her. So your wife, the coggle was vetted. It was sort of, yeah, they were brutally, they were vicious toward her. But since I am dismissive, so is she. They didn't care about that too much. If it was Kendall or Roman or Chavan had married a questionable person, then they

would have some just to find out. I don't count. Not enough. Anyway. How many more shows? Well, there would be 10. It starts. And 10 shows. I just can't wait to see it. And, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, it's just. Uh, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, the. Uh, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the there will be 10. It starts to say. Ten shows. I just can't wait to see it. And it's just been a masterful show. My congratulations to everyone, Frank Rich, the executive producer, and just everybody. Yeah. Wonderful bunch of people. Well, congratulations. This has been the best bunch I've ever worked with, truly.

And I've been doing this a long time out. And I know some of the other people you've worked with, and they're going to be really sorry to hear that. They're going to be really pissed. Yeah. Yeah. You know, some of us go on a publicity tour and blow it. There's a lot of their old friends, but... But they're old friends out.

Yeah, yeah. They're not the new crop. Which is, that's who counts everybody. New friends who can do you some good. Isn't that right? Welcome to show business. Yeah, if we have any advice for anyone, not just here in the audience tonight, but anyone watching on tele-.. th. th. th. th. th. th. But th. But the th. But their th. But th. But their th. But th. But th. But their th. But th. But the the? Welcome to show business. Yeah, if we have any advice for anyone not just here in the audience tonight, but anyone watching on television New friends who can help you out

there. Season four of succession will premiere March 26th on HBO and HBO Max. Okay. We'reto take a quick break and we'll be right back after this. That's our show for tonight, but before we go, when I was in the Senate, one of my favorite pieces of legislation was matching service dogs with veterans with PTSD. The organization was matching service dogs with veterans with PTSD. The organization Hero Dogs raises, trains, and places wonderful and life-changing service dogs with veterans to support them in their

work. Please donate at the link below. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show, wherever you get your podcasts. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.