The Daily Show: Ears Edition - America’s Failing Water Infrastructure - If You Don’t Know, Now You Know

Episode Date: March 24, 2022

America’s water infrastructure is failing. Here’s a look at how we got here, the impact this has on the country and what we can do about it. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the I-Heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You're listening to Comedy Central. President Biden has been negotiating with Republicans over a giant bill to fix America's aging infrastructure, and the two sides are having trouble coming to an agreement, mostly because Biden wants to pay for the bill by raising taxes on corporations and the super-rich, and Republicans want to pay for it by selling tickets to Trump's surprise re-enogaeration in August. And hopefully they can figure things out soon,

because there's one particular part of America's infrastructure that's truly garbage right now. And I'm talking about America's water system. The question is, why why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, th is, th is, th is, th is, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. right now. And I'm talking about America's water system. The question is, why is it that bad? Well, let's find out in another edition of, if you don't know, now you know. Water, it's Mike Pence's favorite soup. Water is one of the essentials for human survival, along with food, air, and the new Olivia Rodrigo album, which just, guys, she gets me, y'all. But as important as it is, in America, the infrastructure that transports the water is breaking down faster than me listening to the Olivia Rodrigo album.

It's an issue that's tough to see, literally, water problems. Often they go unnoticed until it's too late, but it's a problem that's getting worse across the country with aging infrastructure. The nation's water infrastructure system gets a grade of D by the American Society of Civil Engineers. Thousands of dams and levies are on the brink of failure. Our water infrastructure all over the American Society of Civil Engineers. Thousands of dams and levies are on the brink of failure. Our water infrastructure all over the country is literally hitting a breaking point everywhere. The last time there was a major re-haul of water infrastructure creating these new pipes and systems was about 1945. For sewer and water systems, we're living off systems,

were actually some of them built in the 19th century. In at least 545 municipalities across the country, there are cast iron pipes that are now more than 100 years old. The aging infrastructure has led to a point where a water main breaks somewhere in this country every two minutes. God damn people, a pipe is bursting every two minutes? If America were a person, it would have to wear depends. America's water pipes are so bad that they got a D from the infrastructure experts. And keep in mind, a pipe that gets an F is just a puddle of water.

And it's not surprising that these pipes are falling apart, because some of them have been around since the 19th century. So, not only are they failing, but they're also probably a little racist. I mean, I guess on the bright side, though, this is definitely keeping America's enemies from invading. You know, North Korea is probably looking at America like, the layout is nice, but the plumbing is a disaster. I mean, it's just not worth the gut renovation.

I don't know, guys. And look, people, unless you live in Mario World, you probably don't spend a lot of your time thinking about pipes. But you should, because when the pipes that carry America's water become old and busted, the effects can be pretty drastic. Our aging water infrastructure systems are making clean, safe drinking water unreliable in many parts of this country. The National Resources Defense Council estimates 30 million Americans drink community water that contains lead and 5.5 million get water that exceeds the EPA's maximum levels.

Go east and in places like North Carolina, water has been contaminated by coal ash. Go west, it's nitrates from fertilizers. So we have blue water here. We let our water system just elapidate to the point of collapse. It's like third world country here. Our wastewater systems are crumbling. People are living with sewage water and sewage in their streets. The city of Fort Lauderdale, rushing to clean out more than 200 million

gallons of toxic sewage, flooding the streets, seeping into houses, and spilling into waterways. Rivers of raw sewage flowing down streets in Ventner. It's really gross. It stinks real bad. I can't move my car in there. That is a shit lake if I ever saw one. Wow, that poor guy.

What a bad deal to live next to a shit lake. If I was him, I'd try and sell that house ASAP. That's right, I'm selling some lakefront property. Oh cool, what lake? Man, it's a lake. Do you want it or not? And shit lakes aside, did you see that gross blue water? I don't care where you live. Taking a bath should never turn into a surprise gender reveal. And by the way, can America please

stop comparing all of its failures to the third world? Because every time there's an infrastructure problem or an insurrection, Americans are like, this is just like a third world country. No, guys, it's not cool. All right, because you don't hear Africans comparing their school shootings to America. They don't do that. You know why? Because Africa doesn't have school shootings. Yeah, all our children are soldiers.

So how did America's water system end up this way in the first place? Well, basically, a lot of people in the past decided that rather than fixing a bunch of little problems back then, it would be easier to wait for them to become big problems and then leave them to us. Infrastructure is not particularly sexy, you know, it's something that seems easy to kick from one year to the next and suddenly you look up and it's been 30 years. According to the American Society of Civil Engineers, the federal government's capital spending on water infrastructure has dropped from 63% in 1977 to 9% in 2017. Repairing, improving, maintaining the nation's water systems requires big money.

The American Water Works Association estimates it will take a trillion dollars for drinking water alone. As costs to fix the systems continue to rise. Investment in water infrastructure has increasingly fallen to state and local governments over the past few decades. The problem is that cities are burdened by debt and don't have the money to fix pipes. Milwake has a program to split the cost of replacing lead pipes with homeowners, but so far only 1% has been done. The city is trying to replace 70,000 lead laterals and at a pace at about a thousand a year. It would take 70 years. All right, you've got to be kidding me.

70 years? In 70 years, we won't even need pipes. the only time you hear something's going to take 70 years to fix. We probably just absorb water through NFT's or something. I don't actually understand what they are because I'm like, what do you mean I don't own the art? The only other time you hear something's going to take 70 years to fix is when you're on the phone with your cable company. Yeah, we can get a guide to come check out your router in 2091. Does any time between 11 p.m. and 3 p.m. work for you? What? I'll be dead by then! Do you want the appointment or not, sir?

Okay, I'll take it. And you know, as crazy as this is, I actually get why politicians never want to spend money on pipes. Because it's expensive and it's boring. I mean, think about it. If you open a new stadium, you get to hold a press conference there, you know, with a big ribbon cutting. It's flashy. But how are you supposed to celebrate a new sewage pipe? Huh? Well, you invite the press to watch you take a huge dump at City Hall? Well, it's actually not a bad idea. But the reason this has gotten so bad and so expensive is because they waited so

long to fix it. You see people, you have to address problems when they come up. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to th. th. th. th. th. tho. to tho. tho. tho, tho, tho, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to to to the to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the. thean, thean, theateateate.a. thean, theatean, theateatean, thean, thean, the. to address problems when they come up or they just get worse. And that goes for everything. Infrastructure, relationships. Hell, even this mole that I probably should have gotten checked out before it grew into its own person. Al it's fine, buddy. You can probably put it up for another 10 years. You know what, you're right, Mole.

I love this guy. And while the water situation is pretty poor across the entire, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and, thi, thi, and, thi, thi, thi... And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi, thi, thi, thi. And while the water situation is pretty poor across the entire United States, there's one group of people in the US who are getting the shortest, dirtiest, most lead-covered end of the stick. And you can probably guess who it is, right? Who? Who? Who? There is a close correlation between race and economics and whether or not you have clean water in the United

States of America. Newark is a largely poor, mostly black and Hispanic city and its lead levels are among the highest in the US for large water systems. Some houses here tested four times the federal limit. Much of Mississippi's largest city is beginning its fourth week without safe drinking water coming out of faucets. Jackson residents, about 80% of whom are black, remain under a system-wide order to boil water. For the past eight years, Keystone, West Virginia has been under a boil water advisory, eight years. It's so common it doesn't even make headlines anymore.

You can run the water sometime, and it's as brown as I am. Good Lord sometime and it's as brown as I am. Good Lord. The water is as brown as I am? I mean when people were asking for more black representation they weren't talking about the water supply I know that. And this is extremely messed up that so many black people in America don't have access to clean drinking water. I mean I know reparations might not happen any time soon but maybe America can start with a bitter filter. I will say though th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi tho, the the the the the the thean, the the thean, thooooooooo-n, tho-n, know reparations might not happen anytime soon, but maybe America can start with a bitter filter. I will say, though, it's impressive how even with this shitty water supply, blacks still don't crack.

Can you imagine how good black people would look with proper hydration? Who we? So, there you have it. America's water systems are on the verge of collapse, and the country needs to start fixing them now. This isn't a problem that can be kicked down the road anymore, people, especially when that road is buried six feet under Shit Lake. And if you don't know, now you know. Watch the Daily Show, weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central,

and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Do nice guys really finish last. I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new mini-series on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti will examine villains undone by their villainy, monstrous self-devaring egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency.

Listen on the Iheart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.