The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Breaking Down the Trump-Cohen Hush Money Tape | Bo Burnham

Episode Date: July 26, 2018

Melania Trump infuriates her husband by watching CNN, a secretly taped discussion between Donald Trump and Michael Cohen raises questions, and Bo Burnham talks "Eighth Grade." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show.. It it it. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. to to the. to to to to to to to to to the. the. to to to to the, the, the th, th, th, th, the th, the th, the the th, the th, the the the the the the the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the t ti ti ti ti. ti. ti. the the the the the the the the the the the smartest way to hire. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about. All the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking

about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. July 25th, 2018. From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York. This is the Daily Show, everybody. I'm Triminoa. Thank you so much for shooting in.

Our guest tonight is the amazing Bo Burnham. So excited to have him here. We're going to be talking about the film he wrote and directed called 8th Grade. But first, let's catch up on today's headlines. Wush. You know how some people say they love Drake so much that they would die for him? Well, it turns out they're telling the truth. It's the viral dance challenge set to Drake's song, in my feelings, it is completely taken over social media.

Everyone seems to be doing it. But the way some people are letting those feelings out is drawing the attention of safety officials. Videos show passengers and even drivers jumping out of moving cars to dance on streets and highways. And in some cases, the results aren't pretty. Oh man. And you know, people are so crazy that they're going to be scraping that girl off the pavement and she'll be going, do they get the retweets?

Click to subscribe. Like, I'm sorry, man. Going viral has gotten way too difficult. I remember back in the day, you could go viral for getting all your friends into a phone booth. You remember that? Yeah? Remember planking? It was like, wow, you're not moving? Two million lights! Now to go viral, you've got to eat laundry detergent, set yourself on fire, or dance on the freeway after jumping out of your moving car. Like, pretty soon if you want to go viral, you're gonna have to be like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible. Let me love me.

Are you riding? Oh good. Ah, Scientology. All right. Let's move on. In other news, Serena Williams is charging discrimination after learning that the US Anti-Doping Agency has given her twice as many random drug tests as any other female pro-tennis player.

Yeah. Testing her more than five times this year alone, which is a lot. Basically, she's going to need a new Gatorade sponsorship just to stay hydrated for all the drug test that she's taken. And Serena does so many tests, she doesn't even have to bring the sample to the lab anymore. The second she fills a cup, a ball boy just runs out and grabs it. They just run away with it. I will say this, though, what I love about Serena Williams, the teanee's such an innate thina thineineine that she thine thine thine that she never failed a single drug test. Yeah. She's the Serena Williams of drug tests.

The greatest of all time. Oh, also in the news today, there's trouble in the paradise that is Donald and Melania Trump's marriage. The New York Times says Melania Trump infuriated her husband during their recent overseas trip when he noticed her TV on Air Force One was tuned to CNN. On his flight to Helsinki, the president blew up when he found the first lady watching CNN instead of Fox on Air Force One. The president reportedly raged at his staff according to the Times for violating a rule that the airplane's television should remain tuned to Fox.

Violating a rule, wow. I know Trump's not a fan of a woman's right to choose, but this is ridiculous. I mean, like he was furious because he found out Melania was watching CNN instead of Fox, which when you think about it is probably her way of cheating on him. You know? She was probably like, that's right, husband. I've been secretly seeing a black man, Don Lamon. But let's be honest, if there's one person who can't be mad at their spouse for doing things behind their back, it's the commander in cheat, which brings us to our main story.

Look, we've known for a long time that President Trump once had an affair with Playboy, Playmate Karen McDougall. But yesterday, we learned more about the conspiracy to keep this affair quiet. Thanks to Michael Cohen, Trump's former attorney and soprano's background actor. You didn't even notice him in the picture, do you? Because you see, it turns out like so many soprano's characters Cohen was wearing a wire. This is a secret recording provided by Michael Cohen's lawyer. Cohen and then

candidate Donald Trump discussing paying for former playmate Karen McDougall's story of an alleged affair the president trunighs. When it comes time for the financing which will be... Listen, what have the financing? We'll have to pay you, so... No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's just sorted and embarrassing that the President of the United States is on tapes talking about how, how payoffs work and what he's going to do and all of that, it's

it's cringe-inducing. Cringe-inducing? I can't believe this guy has any cringes left. Yeah, I ran out of cringes back on the Muslim band. Are you serious? And just so we're clear on what this is, this tape is about hush money for Trump's playmates affair, all right? Not the porn star affair, which are separate affairs. And all of that is also completely thiiiiiaaa thiiiiii that is that is that is that is that is also completely different from the whole Russia affair. Right. Maybe that's why Trump always tweets witch hunt like maybe he's asking wait which hunt is this again? Which hunt is this folks? I don't know. So many of them. So many of them. And just a little side note it is a little weird

that we know so much about where the president has put his the theyk can we acknowledge that? That's not normal. That's like th. Like th. Like th. Like th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's thi that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi thi thi. that's that's that's that's th weird that we know so much about where the president has put his d'i-k, can we acknowledge that? That's not normal. Like think about it, think about it. In all of American history, it's only Trump, Clinton, and Lincoln. And yes, I said Lincoln, because you know at some point Abraham put in that big sexy hat. You know he did. At some point, he was like, well, thi, well, well, well, well, well daddy gets some stove pipe time. Now, please remember, remember this.

An affair with a playmate isn't illegal. Neither is paying hush money. Neither is having your campaign spokesperson lie about it. The issue here is whether by paying off the Playboy model shortly before election day, Trump and the world's worst lawyer made an unreported campaign contribution, which would be illegal. And on this tape, it's a little unclear. Like we do hear Trump say the word cash, and then Cohen says, no, no, no, no, but that could

mean anything. Like, was he saying no, no, no, no, no to a cash payment? Or was Trump trying to put his fingers in the electrical sockets again. We don't know. Yeah. He's like, no, no, no, Mr. President, not in the buzz-buzz place. Not in the buzz-buzz. Now, although some people believe that this tape proves Trump's guilt, according to the world's second worst lawyer, it actually proves Trump's innocence. Giuliani, teling NBC News, the conversation, and he insists no payment ever occurred. So are you still maintaining then tonight that the recording that was released this evening is 100% exculpatory toward the president?

There's no indication of any crime being committed on this tape, and that is absolutely right. I don't think anyone can suggest that this represents anything where the president did anything wrong. I love that the secret Playboy affair hush money tape is the evidence to help Trump. Yeah. I mean, it can, but you have to admit it'll probably make an awkward dinner with Melania. And it was just like, great news, honey. The tape about my second mistress totally gets me off the hook. Like, wow, everything everything everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, everything, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. Like, wow, everything coming up millennia. And honestly, honestly, I agree

with Rudy Giuliani here, right? And not with his decision to surgically replace his teeth with horse teeth. No, I agree, I agree that none of the stuff on this tape is impeachable. It's embarrassing and scandalous, but it's not criminal. But all legal questions aside, there's one part of the tape that does come through crystal clear. Donald Trump apparently completely unaware he's being taped asking for refreshments. So we got served from the New York Times, I told you this. We're requiring to unseal the divorce papers with Ivana. We're fighting it.

Cassowitz is going to... Never, never. Never, never. Casual says that they don't ever be able, they don't have a... Give me a Coke, please. Now that's is shocking. I never thought I'd hear Donald Trump say the word, please.

And to be honest, I feel a little bit bad for Coke because this is not the product placement they were hoping for, right? But you know what I thought of? If people are going to secretly record Trump and then play his tapes to the world, he may as well benefit, right? Because Trump is always looking for new ways to make money, he should just start slipping endorsements into all of his private conversations. Yeah, and you know what, it would work they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll, they're they're they're they're their. their th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. they're they're they're they're just start slipping endorsements into all of his private conversations. Yeah, and you know what?

It would work a lot better than you think. Mr. Trump, there'll be no record if you're working with the Russians. Terrific. Can you get me a Coke zero? Zero calories for zero illusion. Stormy Daniels is the manned 100K to keep quiet. Pay her, because I just saved a boatload on car insurance by switching to GEICO. Fifteen minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance by switching to GEICO.

Mr. President, the cash payment went through, so we're all good. Well, nothing's as good as the number one comedy in America. Mama Mia, here we go again. Now that's smart business. We'll be right back. comedy in America. Mama Mia, here we go again. Now that's smart business. We'll be right back. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or

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I'm Tim Harford, host of The Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-deviring egos, and we'll delve into the extraordinary power

of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper, and dare to confront a formidable empire. The art of fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the Iheart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show, it's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're

going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance, it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.

Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight is a comedian who wrote and directed his first feature film, 8th grade. Please welcome, Bo Burnham. Happy to be here, Trevor. This is so good to have you, man. Your journey. That's a lot. Thank you.

Welcome to the show, Bo Burnham. Happy to be here, Trevor. This is so good to have you, to have you, today. throwne, to the comedy scene. But BoBurnum for so for so for so so for for so so so so to to so to so to so to so to so to so to to to to to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have you to have you the the the the the the the the the the to have the to have to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have to have to have to have time and then I met you in the comedy scene but Bo Burnham for so many people was one of the first quote unquote internet sensations. Yeah but Bo Burnham for most people was who but yes for some people I was an internet sensation which is a term I love. Yeah maybe. A sensation. So so so here you as Bo Burnham you are this savant and this comedy genius like music and comedy and and the the comedy and thi the th th th th th th th th th th th thine thine thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to the to the the the the the the the the the the the th as Bo Burnham, you, this savant and this comedy genius, like music and comedy and making everything, and then you step that into onto the stage, you know, and what really

intrigued me is when you talk about the stories of how uncomfortable you were in a space where you seemed completely comfortable. Yeah, I mean, I was having panic attacks on stage regularly, which is chill. And yeah, I don't, I don't, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't, I don't, I don't, I, I don't, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't, I don't, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I don't, I don't, I don't th. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I, I, Yeah, I mean, I was having panic attacks on stage regularly, which is chill. And yeah, I don't know. I would talk about my specific anxieties of being on stage performing, thinking that they were specific to what I was at the time, a 25-year-old male comedian with an audience, and I would do my shows and talk about that, and 13-year-old girls would come up to me after and say, I feel exactly, I feel I th and I th and I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I thi-I thi-I thi-I'd thi-a-I'd thee-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s, I'd-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s, I'd th, I'd thanananananananananededededed-s, I'd-s, I'd-s, I'd-s. I'd-s. I'd-swoo'-seeeaseaseaseeno'-wo'-no'-no'-no'-no'-no'-n't-a-a-a-a-s, I up to me after and say I feel exactly like you do and I'd go what? No but truly. So you know if there was a bridge I had to walk right to make this movie it was built by them to me. I felt understood by eighth grade girls

before people truly truly people always said like he's just a comedian for eighth grade girls and at a certain point I was like thi thrown. to the the the the the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It was built th. It was built th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the the. the. the.'s great is that, is that genuinely, you made a movie that, like, seems like it's so specific, and yet I feel like it speaks to everything that most people go through in life. And you look at this movie, you have a fantastic story about a young girl who's going through her week of eighth grade. And it's also about the impact of social media on her life, and like, and th. And it, and it, and it, like, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I th. And, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I think, I think, I thi, I feel like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and I think, and I the, and I th. And I th. And I th. And I th. And I th. And I I th. And I I th. And I I th. And I th, I th, I th, I th. And I th, I th. And I th. And I th. And I th. And I thi, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, I feel like, like, and I feel like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and I feel like, like, like, like, like, I feel like, I feel like, between your life and the story that we're told of her life in this film? Yeah, I just set out to talk about how it was feeling and then I found out I was feeling like an eighth grader, truly. I feel like usually this, there's a sort of crappy narrative that the only story is about the human condition or about some like poet in the way we usually do for older male characters?

You have been part of internet culture for a longer time than many people. You've been intrinsically connected to it for a long time. Do you see that? Is that what you put in the movie? Because they're parts in the movie where I'm watching it and I'm going, yeah, we're wento that. We want to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the internet to be the internet the internet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to be to be a to be a to be a to be a the internet. Yeah. the internet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to to to to the the internet the internet the internet the internet the internet the internet the internet. the internet the internet. the internet.... to be the internet............ to be to be to be the internet................................................................................................. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the not real world, but the people in the real world are trying to have conversations with us and we don't care. We're all doing this thing, trying to see where the likes come from. Is that something you've experienced? Is that why you put that in the movie? Yeah, I mean, my impulse really was the more I engaged with a subtler conversation to be had, which is like, how is it interfacing with our hearts? I didn't want to have this sort of finger-wagging movie. There's a lot of movies that seem

like they're, you know, they try to shove the internet into it where it feels like a Taco Bell commercial where it's like, hashtag chalupa? You know, but I just want to, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, I the, the, the, th is, th is, th is, th is, th is, th is, th is, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th is th. th is, I th. th. I th. I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't that, I didn't that, I didn't that, I didn't that, I didn't that, that, I didn't that, I didn't that, I didn't, I didn't talk about, can you talk about, I should not say that, tacos, bells, great. No, but I just wanted to, there's so much commentary about the internet, there's not a lot of description of it and just like I feel like we're all in it. And in 20 years when the kids in my movie become social scientist, I'll be very curious to hear what we just need to take emotional inventory, because I don't think we've even like begun to describe what the internet is, let alone be able to talk about it, some 50-year-old dusty dude telling me about like, you know, social trends.

I'm like, just, stop it. If you were to try and sum up the feeling of the movie in a short sound bite, what would you hope it would be? What would you want people to walk away from after watching eighth grade? I hope it feels like eighth grade which eighth grade is horrible and strange and weird and my body is exploding and help me and woo-hoo, you know, so that's what I hope the movie feels like like eighth grade feels like right now which is scary and weird and funny and sad so yeah I hope I hope I hope people just feel I don't you know feel I don't feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel. you. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the Feel. Feel. Woo-hoo. Shalupa, maybe. Thank you, Trevor. Appreciate it. thanks, so much we're going to show. Eighth Braves is in some next cities now.

You really want to go watch this movie. It'll be in theaters nationwide, August 3rd. Boat Burnham, everybody. The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show.com. Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. And subscribe to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content and more. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday. Thank God it's Thursday we're going to be talking about.

All the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches and I know that I listed that fourth but in importance it's probably second? I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance, it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.