The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Coronavirus Updates - New Restrictions, Moderna's Vaccine & Thanksgiving During the Pandemic

Episode Date: November 22, 2020

Surging COVID-19 cases lead to statewide restrictions, drugmaker Moderna announces a 95% effective coronavirus vaccine, and nearly half of all Americans cancel their Thanksgiving plans. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or experience. But not with Zip Recruiter. Zip Recruiter finds amazing candidates for you fast. And right now you can try it for free at Zip Recruiter's smart technology identifies top talent for your roles quickly. Immediately after you post your job, Zip Recruiter's powerful matching technology starts showing you qualified people for it, and you can use Zip Recruiter's pre-written

invite to apply message to personally reach out to your favorite candidates and encourage them to apply sooner. Ditch the other hiring sites and let Zip Recruiter find what you're looking for, the needle in the haystack. Four out of five employers who post on Zip Recruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at this exclusive web address. Zip Recruiter.com slash zip. that's zip recruiter.com. Zip Recruiter. The smartest way to hire. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change.

Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second th 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi-S. thi-S. Zipe-S. Z-S. th-S. thi-S. thi- thi- thi- thi- thi- thi- thi-S. thi-S. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. Z. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi-S. thi's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. pandemic. This morning alarming COVID numbers all across the country. One million Americans diagnosed with COVID-19 just this week. That's about a hundred Americans diagnosed every minute. In Philadelphia where cases are rising, the city starting sweeping restrictions Friday, closing indoor dining, gyms, and putting an end to use sports through the end of the year. California also seeing a surge starting Tuesday, 94% of the state will fall under its strictest tier of restrictions.

In Michigan, rapid spread, almost 13,000 new COVID-19 cases in one day. In Utah, ICUs are nearing capacity. Frontline workers from New York once the epicenter of the virus are now heading there to help. In Iowa, the strain on state hospitals led Governor Kim Reynolds to announce a new mask mandate in nearly all indoor spaces and a ban on indoor gatherings of more than 15 people after months of resisting calls to do so. If Iowans don't buy into this, we lose. You know guys, it's amazing to me

that we are eight months into this pandemic and we're somehow getting worse at dealing with it. It makes no sense. Imagine if I started learning French and on day one I was like, I can't paul Franc. And then eight months later after practicing I was like, uh, M minnow French, don't speak French? And I think it's a little insane that these restrictions are just now happening. Because we've known about the importance of wearing a mosque for months.

And some states are only now, putting a mosque mandates into place. Only now? It's like hosting a pool party. And then in the last 10 minutes saying, all guys, new rule, no shitting in the pool. Yeah, I'm looking at you, David. I mean, better late than never, but there's some shit floating around. But this is why it's so important to always wear a mask in public spaces. Like you can protect your loved ones and your whole community with a $3 strip of fabric,

people. You have no excuse. And yes, maybe you're saying, but Trevor, I'm a rich snob. I would never wear something that only cost $3. Well, now you have no excuse either. Who says it's staying safe can also be a fashion statement.

The world's most expensive face mask, now making its debut. The 1.5 million dollar mask was created by an Israeli jewelry company. Hey, the holidays are coming. It features more than 3,600 black and white diamonds set in 250 grams of pure 18-carat gold. The designer says, it's made to be 100% wearable. It features a slot for the wearer to insert. Yes, a disposable N-99 mask, which is actually finer than an N95 mask. Wow, a 1.5 million dollar mask.

Rich people learn how to read the room. People all over the world are like, we're starving, and we need a more equal society. And then rich people are like, is there any way I can breathe through diamonds? I'm just saying, maybe lay low for a little while. Honestly, guys, where are you even going to wear this thing? Where are you going to wear a diamond mask? I mean, you're not going to wear it in the streets? You're not even supposed to be having parties to be a a, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, tho, their, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thr, the, the the the the the the the their, their, their, thr, thr, thri, thri, thri.. And, thri.a. And, thri.a.a. Wea. Wea. And, thri. Wea. Wea, thri. And, thri. And, th supposed to be having parties during Corona. So you're just gonna end up wearing this around the house, showing it off to your cat.

So, Mr. Whiskers, you impressed? Yeah, no, you go back to where you came from. Of course, masks aren't the only important thing needed to slow the spread of coronavirus. We also have to keep up social distancing. And right now, that means it's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi.oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... tooffic. too.. too. the not having big family get-togethers for the holidays, especially indoors, which sucks, please, don't get me wrong, I get it. But does it suck more than having your loved ones die of COVID? Well, according to the Trump administration, yes, yes, it does.

Dr. Scott Atlas, who is one of the president's sources, as it relates to the pandemic. And he has now come out and is thiiiiiiiiiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thoen, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, tho, tho, tho, to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to too, too, tho, tho, tho, tho. tho. thooooooooo. thooooooo. too. too. too. too. too. too, is too, is too, the pandemic. And he has now come out and is talking about what people should be doing is they head into Thanksgiving with so much attention on the holiday right now. This kind of isolation is one of the unspoken tragedies of the elderly who are now being told, don't see your family at Thanksgiving. For many people, this is their final Thanksgiving,

believe it or not. What are we doing here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here here. I think we have to have a policy which I have been advocating, which is a whole person, whole health policy. No, man, this dude can't be serious. For many people, this is their final Thanksgiving, really? I mean, yes, thanks to the Trump administration is definitely going to be many people's final Thanksgiving, but still. And I love that whole, whole person, health policy. If you get Corona, that's the whole thing.

It's not like you're going to say, well, I died of COVID, but damn, those mashed potatoes were great. Look, I do think it's important for people to see their families, especially around Thanksgiving. People look forward to it. But I also think it's more important to be able to see your family for the next 10 thanksgivings that they'll hopefully get to be with you in person after all of this is done. It's not like Americans aren't used to the idea of not going home for the holidays because they have to keep the country safe. American generals in

World War II. They understood this. They weren't like... Yes, beating Hitler is important. But what's the point of freedom? If we have have to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. to be their. their their. their their. their their. their. their. their. their their their. their their their their their their their. their their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their their. their. their. their their their their toe. I. I. I. I. I. I'm thea. Ia. Ia. Ia. I'm thea. Ia. Ia. I'm thea. Ia. I'm their. I's the point of freedom? If we have to miss cranberry sauce for one year, let's go home, soldiers. And it's so hilarious that conservatives have ended up here. Because when this pandemic started, you remember? They said, we don't need to shut down the economy, just be safe and responsible. Then they were like, we don't have to wear masks just to protect the elderly. Now they're like, you know what, bring the elderly in here. I can't fit all those leftovers in my fridge. Okay, get in here. It just doesn't make sense.

It doesn't make sense why Trump is willing to risk old people being exposed to Corona this much, unless, unless he thinks that it'll end up making him look good in the long run, because you won't have old people dying if all the old people are already dead. The coronavirus. It's the reason we're all throwing dinner parties in a parking lot. Right now, things are looking pretty dire.

There have been over 11 million recorded cases in the US, and one third of all Americans know someone who has died of COVID-19. And with the holiday is just around the corner, there is both good news and bad news. The bad news, of course, is that you won't be able to spend time with your extended family. The good news is you won't have to spend time with your extended family.

And this morning, there was also some really some really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some the the the their family. And this morning, there was also some really good news. This morning, another potential breakthrough in the battle against COVID, a vaccine developed by Moderna, showing a 94.5% efficacy rate in a trial with 30,000 participants. One big difference between the Moderna vaccine, and one developed very promising results in early trials.

Mdurna says its vaccine. Does it need to be kept at extremely low temperatures to remain stable. That could help with shipping and distribution. Yes people, just weeks after a vaccine. There's another one on the way. I mean, are you serious? No vaccine? Two vaccines. I mean, at this point in three months, we're going to have so many vaccines. You'll be able to pick the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one th. The one thi one thi one thi one the one thi, that, thi, thi, that, that, that, that, tho-a, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. tha, tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, ttt. tttt. tttttttttttttttte. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. I mean, at this point, in three months, we're going to have so many vaccines. You'll be able to pick the one that just best fits your personality. Are you getting the Moderna vaccine? No, dude, I'm getting the Pfizer one. I mean, I'm a Gemini. Now, apparently the Pfizer vaccine is 90% percent

thiipefe% immune from COVID, baby. Woo! When COVID is in the room, it's gonna catch me. Where you wear, COVID, where you wear? This is also gonna raise the stakes for vaccines, because some scientists will come out like, I made another vaccine. It is 88% effective.

And we'll be like, what? Kil yourself, you, th ass. And here's something interesting. Madonna says that its research is going much faster than expected because in order to get enough data, they need a certain number of people in the study to catch coronavirus. And that has been extremely easy because this pandemic is so out of control. Just imagine that for a second. We're getting the vaccine faster because of irresponsible people. So you need to go on your balcony at 7 p.m. tomorrow night and you

clap for those people who are not wearing masks. But guys, let me tell you something. When this vaccine hits, the streets are gonna be lit! It's gonna be like the end of World War II. Hell, I'm gonna be in Times Square kissing the first bat that I see. Come here. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or experience. But not with Zip Recruiter. Zip Recruiter finds amazing candidates for

you fast. And right now you can try it for free at Zip Recruiter.com. Zip Recruiter's smart technology identifies top talent for your roles quickly. Immediately after you post your job, Zip Recruiters powerful matching technology starts showing you qualified people for it. And you can use Zip Recruiters' pre-written invite to apply message to personally reach out to your favorite candidates and encourage them to apply sooner. Ditch the other hiring sites and let Zip Recruiter find what you're looking for, the needle in the haystack. Four out of five employers who post on Zip Recruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at this exclusive web address,ziprecruiter.com slash zip.

Again that's zip recruiter.com slash zip. Zip recruiter. The smartest way to hire. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.

I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to get the canned cranberry sauce or the good canned cranberry sauce. But in Corona, the big question is whether to have Thanksgiving at all. There's no place like home for the holidays and that indulgent Thanksgiving feast with friends and family. But coast to coast cases of the coronavirus are on the rise and travel plans are changing. In a recent survey, 47% of Americans say they're going to cancel.

There is growing concern the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday could turn into a super spread or event. New York City's Mayor Bill De Blazio just announcing that the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade will go virtual this year year........ th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to c. to co. to co. to co. to co. But to coa. toe. toe. toe. But, to a super spreader event. New York City's mayor Bill DeBlazio just announcing that the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade will go virtual this year. Some experts are calling the hundreds of thousands of college students traveling across the country for the holidays, quote, little ticking time bombs. Oh yeah, this is the perfect holiday week for Corona.

Young people come home from colleges, party together indoors, in their hometown, and then hang out with their oldest relatives. You best believe Corona's already lining up right now like it's a Black Friday sale on grandparents. And let's be honest, Corona would just be one more shitty thing that kids bring home from college. Because college kids only bring stuff home that nobody wants. Piles of dirty laundry, shitty taste in beer, their new boyfriend who starts every sentence with, well, according to Nietzsche? Shut up and pass the mashed potatoes, Beckett. Honestly, I think they should just cancel the parade altogether.

Why would I want to watch a virtual balloon of SpongeBob when I can just watch the actual SpongeBob? In fact, why am I even talking to you now when I could be watching SpongeBob? Ha ha ha, Squidward, you never win. But even with the pandemic, many people don't want to cancel Thanksgiving altogether. And the good news people is that you don't need to cancel Thanksgiving, as long as you take some simple precautions. If you have no choice but to have dinner indoors, be sure to open the windows. Really let that outdoor air circulate in. It'll get to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. to, to, to, to, to, to to to to be too, thi, to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the the, the. the. the. thin. thin. the. te. tea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toe. ta. tto open the windows. Really let that outdoor air circulate in. It'll get nice and cold, but you're also going to get a lot of air exchange and it'll

really create that outdoor environment indoors. Eat at separate tables if dining inside. Of course, the safest Thanksgiving is going to be spent virtually apart, but together, and Zoom is trying to help out with that. They're going to be lifting their 40-minute time limit on free video chats, so your Thanksgiving video calls can go on for as long as you'd like. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Zoom is allowing unlimited calls.

Do they not realize how much they are screwing us over? People. That 40-minute time limit was a get out of jail free card. Yeah, you can thank Zoom this year when you're on a three-hour call with your cousin explaining his foot surgery. You see, Trevor, it's called a metatassal and in the foot there are many bones, the smaller, they can break a fracture and connected to that one, it's the meniscus through the Achilles tendon, which can be poured slightly, and then that can create the problem. But the doctor said, the doctor said what? We can fix it. But a lot of these suggestions are smart.

All right? Like opening the windows is a great idea. It improves ventilation and social distancing. Because you see, once the room is freezing and the food is all cold, everyone will get back in their cars and go home. In fact, I also have an idea for a safe Thanksgiving. Instead of playing your annual toucest football game, keep social distance by playing paintball. Also, don't tell anyone else that you're playing paintball. Yeah, if you're the only one with a paintball gun, you automatically win.

Of course, a smaller guest list just means a smaller turkey. And weird as it seems, even that is creating a problem this year. Health officials are really urging people to pass on that big, traditional, large family gathering. And that has actually led to a weird dilemma. There's a run on small turkeys. Turkeys that are 10 to 14 pounds are in high demand right now, with consumers reporting picked over freezer now, with consumer to reporting picked over freezer cases with only 20 pound birds left behind. That has created a shortage of smaller birds.

Since the grow time of a turkey starts in the summer, it's hard to control their size. They're going to grow at the pace they're going to grow at. And you can't say, okay guys, we're going to put you on their on their to their to to their their to to their thea. theat. t. theat, theat, t. theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, thea, thea, thea, tha, tha. And, tha. And, tha. And, ttau, ttau, ttau, ttau, ttau, tta. And, tta. And, tta. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, t. And, ttt. And, tttttttttttttttthau.... And, tf. And, tf.. And, tf... And, tf. And, tf. And, tf. And, toguu. And, toguu. And, ttt grow at. And you can't say, okay guys, we're going to put you on a diet. That just doesn't work. All right, everybody. We did it. We discovered the most American problem of all time. You're worried that even your food is too overweight? And yeah, that farmer is right. You cannot put a turkey on a diet. But what you can do is tell them that their high school reunion is coming up. Best believe they'll be eating salad with dressing on the side for a month. Also, how would a turkey diet even work? Okay, guys, listen up. This is called a juice cleanse, right?

For a week, you're all gonna be drinking lemon juice with like cayenne pepper and you this seems more normal on Instagram. Now that I'm saying it's you in real life life the the listen here, America, everybody has to eat the big turkeys. Please. Because if we don't eat the big turkeys this year, that means they're only going to get bigger next year. Then, by the next year, we'll be wrestling the turkey over who goes in the oven. Gobloom. And finally, there's one more way that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona that corona is that corona is that corona is that's that's that's that's that's there there's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's more way that Corona is making Thanksgiving more difficult than usual. If the whole family isn't gathering at Grandma's house this year, that means they can't just make Grandma do all the cooking.

With more people staying home for Thanksgiving, more Americans will be cooking at home for the first time, and some of them are stressed. A new survey by Campbells shows that when in five home cooks are going to be first-time Thanksgiving hosts and two-thirds of Americans are dreading the possibility of an epic cooking fail. And with more amateur cooks hitting the kitchen this year, one firefighter says it could be a recipe for disaster. It's easy to see how they get distracted. They walk away from a stove top, they walk away from an oven, and the next thing you know is we have a disaster. If culinary arts isn't your calling, then cooking a Thanksgiving turkey can be tricky. That's why Whole Foods has teamed up with progressive insurance to provide their first ever Thanksgiving

turkey protection plan. If you have a Turkey cooking fail, Whole Foods is offering a $35 gift card as insurance. All customers will need a receipt, a picture of the failed turkey, and an explanation of what went wrong. So Whole Foods actually wants a picture of a failed turkey? My only question is, will they accept one of the President of the United States? But for real though, man, you could not have a better embodiment of the President of the United States. But for real though, man. You could not have a better embodiment of the problems facing America than right here.

All right? On a day when people gather, during a deadly pandemic to binge eat, it's the Turkey that has a solid insurance plan. This is why I play it safe and microwave my turkey. Yeah, it's quick. It's easy, and you can use all that extra time that you save to deal with the salmonella that you contract. But it looks like Corona or not, America is going to find some way to celebrate Thanksgiving this year. But please, no matter how you do it, just try and be as safe as you can. Because this pandemic is no joke.

And the most important thing about Thanksgiving is making sure that you're around for the next one. The Daily Show with Covernoa, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show. Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. And subscribe to the Daily show on Thanksgiving th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi th th th th thi th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks. thanks thanks thanks. thanks thanks thanks thanks. thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks. thanks., Twitter, and Instagram, and subscribe to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content and more. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.

You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts.