The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Diners vs. Waffle Houses I Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson

Episode Date: June 10, 2023

Where would you rather go to eat: a diner or a Waffle House? Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and Daily Show writer Josh Johnson discuss their favorite food establishment, who has the better quality food, if they prefer a menu with an abundance of options or a select few items, and the pros and cons of a place being open 24/7. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Listen on the I-Heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey everybody, welcome to hold up with Dulce Salone and Josh Johnson. That's us, by the way. I know I was saying it like it was two other people that we were going to interview and talk to, but it's us, by the way. I know I was saying it like it was two other people that we were gonna interview and talk to, but it's us. I don't know why I say my name, like I forgot my name before I say my name.

But we are here to discuss a really important topic today. Something that's weighed on our hearts and our minds for basically our entire lives and we we had no idea that the other didn't feel the same way. Honestly this is one of those things where it's best that we became good friends before we found this out about each other or else one would have judged the other pretty harshly. We probably would judge each other. Yeah. Today's topic is diners versus waffleouses. Yep. Okay. So this is Waffle Houses of the World taken on the diners of the world. Well, well, it's the Waffle Houses of America. Mm-hmm.

Because I don't believe Waffle House is a international company. I feel like if it is, we would have heard about it. I feel like. Yes, because Waffle House only operates, like the closest Waffle House to here is in Pennsylvania. And me and you know, my friend Ben Bergman, shout to Big Bergman. Me and Ben Bergman have contemplated, renting a car to go. I think it's like a Scranton,

Pennsylvania Waffle House. Yeah. Yeah. It's the closest one. One of the best outings you could probably have is hitting the Six Flags on the way and then going to a Waffle House. That sounds like an incredible weekend. Well, you know, you have to do Waffle House after Six Flags. Yeah, yeah, you don't want to yeah. You want to lose your Waffle House. Yeah, you don't want to have a biological refund on all of your Waffle House. I'll tell you right now though, the thing that would make that trip better besides a Six Flags and then a Waffle House is a six flags and any diner along the way because Waffle House it doesn't stack up. Okay, it doesn't stack up, okay? It doesn't...

So what? To an American institution of dinerism. Okay? No, no, no, no. All right. Listen, listen, this is how you know, you have life fucked up, okay. I'm gonna tell you this this is the reason You don't drink Okay, and I think you've only had like one drink in your life right?

No, I never drank so you've never had alcohol No, and your American Christian life not one sip you didn't have a road tea, you know, irresponsible uncle I mean my uncle's irresponsible, but he had a drink. Interesting. So, the missing ingredient of Waffle House is alcohol. So for a long time, when you first start going to Waffle House, usually, if you didn't go as a kid, you went in college. You start going to walk, it was like you've been out late with your friends, there's nothing else open.

So you go to Waffle House. It was a lot of food, it was super affordable, and you were drunk. Okay. Or a little tipsy. So a lot of it is like, if you are trying, if you have been out drinking, if you are trying if you have been out drinking and you are trying to ensure that you do not have a biological refund on all the alcohol that you purchased Waffle House is a sure fire way to make sure that you do that because all the

times I've been out late and been drinking and seeing people very drunk in a waffle house It is very rare that I have seen somebody have a biological refund because all that waffle house Just soaks up all that liquor see what I'm saying? Okay. That's why you eat carbs like that that thi that? that's why when people are drunk. They want? Totals. They want stuff like that because it's just your their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's toeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. thi. thi. thi. th people are drunk, they want french fries, they want potatoes, they want stuff like that because it's just your body's like, bitch, I need help. Okay. You know, so what they're out here is they're saving,

they're saving the children is what they're doing. They're helping people. That's what it helps me. Then, theylap, then, the they. I. I. I. I. I. I. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's just. It's just. their. their. their. their. their. th. It's just. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. It's just just just just just just just just just just just just just just, their. It's just, their. It's just, their. It's just. It's just. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's just. their. their. their. their. their. today. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their. their. the outside looking in, like I said, I've never drank before, so I'm not gonna act like I know what you're talking about and what I'm talking about. You know what you're talking about? I know what I'm talking about. And I've just noticed that in life, when someone has to be drunk for something is probably not as good as they think it is. Oh, no, no, no, no, I'm I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm. I'm not, I'm not, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm not, th. th. th. th. th. th. that, th. that, th. that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. that, no, no, no, I'm not talking about, I've never been to a diner and been like, this food is amazing.

There's a lot of times, hold on, let me finish, hold on. I remember my mom asking me to go to Waffle House, and it was like a Sunday morning, and I was like, are we gonna get drunk first? What are we doing? And then I was able to have out Waffle House, the the the th................. to be to be to be to be to be the to be the th. I, to be th. I, th. I, to be th. I, to be to be to be to be th. th. to be to be thi. to be thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. I, th. I, th... I, th... I, th... I, th... I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, to, to. I'm, th. I'm, thin, th. I'm, th. I'm, thin, th. I'm, th. I'm, are we doing? And then I was able to have Waffle House without having it be three in the morning and nothing else is open. Or not being a little tips McGee. And I had Waffle House and I was like,

oh, this is actually good even without the alcohol. That alcohol does give you a little like a little, a little you know it's like it's like it's just a little little little kiss from a rose when you know when you're a little inebriated and you're in a waffle house and also it's like the ambience of a waffle house also the waffle house the waffle house the waffle house has I'm sorry to interrupt but I'm sorry to interrupt but what's a way too sophisticated of a word to use for a waffle house Listen, I'm beyonds is too sophisticated of a word to use for Denny's Like that's what I'm talking about because it's like also

There's diners, but like is Denies a diner or the restaurant? Is I have a diner or the restaurant? But a waffle house? Nig it's a waffle house House. So like, you know what you're dealing with. So, this is, just for the listener, just to make sure we've caught everyone up to speed. It seems clear that you are on the side of Waffle House, I'm on the side of Diner, and we're both coming at this thing with maybe an eight out of 10. Like I don't really see our position shifting or changing, but I do plan to help you along and understanding why Waffle House is not where it's at. All right? First of all, you

mentioned ambiance. Ambience, the ambiance of fists, the ambiance of chokes, the ambiance of someone that might be let your food burn only because they are currently engaged in a fist fight. Listen I have never had burned food from Wauvela because I mean sometimes you're at but because I get my hash brown scattered smothered and covered so sometimes it'll be a little crispy on the edges than I want it to be but like honestly I can't I don't I don, I don't know how often I've ever had burned food from a restaurant, period. I'm not, I'm not talking about charred to an absolute crisp.

I'm saying it would have been perfect had somebody not jumped the counter. Listen, I haven't seen a fight in a Waf House? Yes. Was it with the employees? I've never seen a Waffle House fight with the employees. I know it happens. Mm-hmm. We all know it happens. But, um.

No, we all have the same internet. Right. But I've never seen, I've never seen it. Also, what we can always credit the Waffle House for, Waffle House employs more convicted felons than anyone has ever seen. If there's a man, if first of all, if the dude on the grill don't look like he served at least five years, I don't want to cook and shit for me. Yeah, yeah, because that comes with its own level of experience. Like now he's working with real ingredients and not prison ingredients. I understand what you're saying.

But let me, let me kick it to you why I think the diners are just far superior. Okay. Because I'm boogey. Okay, look, all I'm saying is, when someone tells me that they're about to give me steak, I just wanted to be steak, you know? When I get steak at a diner, I know that that's steak. When I get steak at a waffle house, that's burger. That's just burger. No, Waffle House, one has steaks, two. to why are you ordering a steak at a diner or a waffle house in the first place? You have set yourself up for failure. This is why this is my issue with

that's on you. You wanted a high-quality steak from somewhere whose menu is thick like an encyclopedia. This is my issue with diners. And this has always been my issue with diners. Waffle house, it's breakfast and then like burger shit, right? Like I know there's a high turnover. This shit's coming out the door. Yeah. Their menu is laminated. Yeah. I see the pictures. I flip it over. I see the pictures.

Understand. Diner menus. Mm-hmm. Chapter books, Chapter books, Old Testament, new testament, you mean to tell me that you have a turkey dinner, a lobster, Florentine or whatever, but also Disco Fries. What the fuck is happening in here?

I don't know, it is the middle of July. It is the middle of July. Who, who is coming in here and ordering turkey, dressing, cranberry juice? I mean, cranberry sauce, who is ordering turkey with all the fixings in the middle of July. There's so many things on those menus. There's calumari, but then there's also chicken tenders. Like all of, like it's, it's like, oh,

there's like chicken Kiev, but then it's onion rinks. So it's like, I know that there's stuff in here that has just been sitting in your freezer, because people aren't ordering. You tell me somebody who ordered a meatloaf sandwich and a Greek salad in the same day. How long has that meatloaf been in the freezer? How long has that lobster been in the freezer? Turkey dinner? How long has that turkey been to fuck? I have questions and concerns. First of all, how dare you slander the name of diners by assuming that stuff is sitting there? Any good diner has the kitchen and has the freezer that's like a narnia, all right?

There's just amazing stuff back there. There's an endless amount of space. And I'll tell you right now, what you think is the beast, I think is the beauty. So when I see that chapter book laid out in thi, I thia, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, the thi, the the thi, the the the thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, th beauty, all right? So when I see that chapter book laid out in front of me, I'm like, wow, I really have options in life. I could try something and get something that I already like as a backup. So am I going to get a pasta with a burger? Maybe. I'm crazy like that. I can get wild like that because I'm at a diner right now I'm not limited to the to the limited thing you're gonna get a grilled cheese and a chicken Alfredo you fucking child I'm gonna get a grill cheese I'm gonna get spaghetti I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna go ahead and No Okay, real cheese. I'm gonna get spaghetti and you know what you know, just top it all just because I can't because this is

This is what options in life do for you, you know, because when you go to a diner you're your own little Elon must you're your own little Jeff Bezos. They're going to space. I'm out here having orange juice They're going to space. I'm out here having orange juice. Chocolate milk. With a Monte Cristo sandwich. A satafron said a Monte Cristo sandwich. And that's how you have a biological refund is chocolate milk, orange juice. And a money crystal sandwich. Okay, also, this is another metric that I want to bring up because you already brought up a point for Waffle House that they employ a lot of X cons. They're leading employers of X cons and everything. I will offer up to you a lot of diners out there have some of the best cooks in the world that just are struggling

right now, right? So there are some cooks at diners that should be in some of those Michelin Star restaurants, but you know what? They fell off a little bit. You know, maybe they burned the wrong person's stake. Maybe they got into it with a supervisor. And so then they regulated to only work at diners after that. Okay.

I'm just saying, I think the quality. Because you see the menu, that takes skill to be able to do all that stuff. That menu, that means not take skill. It takes a ton of skill. Tell me something on the diner, that I need skill for. Okay, a Greek gomlet. That's soup.

I know, but it's a good- Do you really think that they are in the back of a diner? Making a stock from lobster shells and meat and then adding a cream and doing all this It's it's still a restaurant that mass produces food You buy it from have you worked in a restaurant before? I have worked at a restaurant before we are and I can tell you right now that the best restaurants Put love time care attention into every dish and so when I go to a but if I'm but if I'm getting a lobster bisque that's 599. You did not put love? to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the best I the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the best I the best I the best I the best I the best I the best I the best I the best I the best I the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best. the best. the best. the best. the best. tree. tree. tree. tree. tree. tree. tree. try. the best. try. I the best. I the best. I the best. I into every dish. And so when I go to a- But if I'm getting a lobster bisque, that's 599, you did not put love and care into this lobster bisque. You opened a can. Don't, first of all, don't judge the amount of love.

I'm not judging the amount of love. What I'm saying is there could be plenty of love, but what there was not was prep work and care and time involved. You can't. There's too much stuff on the menu. This is a high volume situation because if you don't use a lobster bisque out of a can, so say you don't sell out that lobster bisque. It's easier to throw away a can of soup that's old than to every day create this stock.

Because this is the thing, there are so many things on a diner menu that if you have anything with the short shelf life, you're throwing away a lot of shit. You're throwing away a lot of inventory. You're not selling all of the, you have seven different soups. Lobster Bisc isn't flying off the shelf. So why would you make that fresh every day? You can't. It makes no sense.

You'd be throwing that soup out every day. So you have to have something in the back that comes in a small enough can to where this one dude that ordered lobster bisque in the past two days He is going to get all the love and care that comes from a can opener and heating up that something up on the stuff Even if you think because we don't know we can't verify even if you think that all the lobster bisque and all the diners is canned, I'll tell you right? I'll tell you right? I'll tell you right. to be able to to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to be to th. the th. th. the th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the. the. te. te. tean. tean. tean tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. te. te from type of food to type of food that also takes skill. All right? You're coming at me with a piping hot delicious veggie-filled casadilla and you're coming at me with some chicken alfredo that's just cooked to perfection. I would love, I would love to see Waffle House try to pull off both of those things. Because Waffle House knows their lane. They have figured out what they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're theirthings. Because Waffle House knows their lane. They have figured out what they are doing. They haven't figured out what they're doing.

No, I'm talking about as a company, not as individual stores. Because I have been in some Waffle House and so I'm just like, I was giving pure chaos on a plate. And I've been to some Waffle House, so I was like, oh, somebody wiped down the edge of this. Somebody gave me some presentation to that. You see what I'm saying? Every experience is different. But every diner is different. But every diner, to me,

every diner menu feels like pure chaos. It's like, there's too many things in this menu. How was all this food in your kitchen? Once you... Why would you want less good? Why do you talk about me? Because it's like... If everything on it is great. I'm trying to get the saying, right? Where it's like, oh, it's like a master of none situation.

Oh, okay. So if you could die? How does it? It's a jack of all trades, master of none Right, so if you are in here making egg rolls, right? Mm-hmm. You're making egg rolls and, and, Thanksgiving dinner, yeah, and pasta, and caesillas, and dry, because the nachos are always dry. Always dry. Always dry. The number of times that I have been just given just, just, justos because the nachos are always dry always dry always dry the

number of times that I have been just given just a just a sands of time nacho there's a thousand things on your menu so it's like oh there's spancopida and chili what the hell is going on in here so Jack of all trades so that's in the chili but yeah keep going I cannot wait I can't to wait I can't to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tie tie to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tell is is is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is tell is the the the's... So that's... In the Chile, but yeah. Keep going. I cannot wait. I cannot wait. So people hear you say, dip the Spanacopita in the Chile. You are a wild man.

I love you. But that was a wild phrase. That was a wild phrase. Dip the Spanicopa in the chili. Oh, the Lord can't bless you living like that. So, can you? Sound like a move from a poor child who just got money. Like just just got out here. Oh, man. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or experience. But not with Zip Recruiter.

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I'm Tim Harford, host of The Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring egos, and will delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean,

blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper, and dare to confront a formidable empire. The art of fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. I'll tell you this, I met a guy at a bar. We went to the Waffa House, because I was the only thing that was open, and we were just sitting there talking, we were at this, we were, I guess it was a date or hanging out or whatever, we were at this waffle house for so long, we ate twice.

Aig twice. I took you saw people change. Oh, there was a shift change. We were in there there talking for like probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably like like like like like like like, like, like, their, their, th. A th. A thi. A thi. A thi. A thi. A thi. A thi. A thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi, I was a thi. I was a thi. I was a thi. I was a thia thia' thia' thia' thi. I was a thi. I was a thi,ing for like probably like seven hours just hanging out. Yeah. Like the sun came up and I was like well we might as well have breakfast now we're in this bitch. So it's like but that was a other great thing about a waffle house. Waffle house is never going to kick you out unless you're acting a fool. Yeah. If they're not super busy a wafowse will let you be there as long as you tho th. You could order a coffee in a Waffle House. As long as you're not taking up a whole booth, Waf House will let you have that coffee and be in there until the return of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Waff House does not care, okay?

You're in here, you're in here. Yes, people will fight, but I've also seen bar fights, okay. We've all been in a place, people fighting the Walmart, people fighting the CVS, people fighting doctors offices, people fight everywhere. People fight in the street, train. So I don't know why Waffle House is getting all of the slack. No, don't do that. Don't do that. That's because you love awful house too much

because it's not a love thing. It's like, you came with the loving attitude of like a mob that's like, look, everybody fights sometimes. There's fighting, they're fighting overseas. They're fighting hit a war right now. They're fighting. I don't understand why my baby fighting

means he gotta be suspended. Because you came with this thing of like, I don't understand what's saying that waffle house. But Waffle House versus regular diners has more fights per capita, all right? There are more punches thrown. Google that. I don't want. I want facts and statistics. You're not going to come in here and act like...

I mean, if we're... If we're putting the Denny's of the World and the IHOPs of the World into the category, I'm asking, if we're doing that, I'm just saying, when we talk about virality, there are more viral videos of some ass whoopens at some waffle houses than there are at the IHOPs. I'm not saying it doesn't happen. I'm saying that the Denny's and the IHops and the places that just have a little... But you have to understand that like IHOP's close. Denny's close. So when you're dealing with a business that is open during the drunk people time, you're going to have more altercations just because you're open during the drunk people time.

You're open during shoot-up-the-club time. Okay. Now, because the IHOPs that are open late, if you take IHOPs that close at 10 or 9, and a 24-hour I hop, I've seen plenty of altercations in a 24-hour I-hop. Yeah. And any time I'm in a 24-hour I-hop, it's because the line at Waffa House was too long. If I'm in a Denny's, it's because, listen, we all enjoy a moons over my hammy, okay, shout out to Denny's, all right? I'll enjoy the love, you know, an egg and cheese and ham sandwich, delicious,

but if you're a 24 hour restaurant, you're gonna deal with nonsense, you just are. Using people act a fool in a 24hour diner. We've all seen. But, yeah. Let's not, let's not act like, you're going to just get more riffraff because your business model is riffraff time. Okay, but I think that there's something to be said. This is also where the diners, the spectrum of diner that that there's something to be said. This is also where the diners, the spectrum of diner that we're in right now, it just outclasses Waffle House because some diners do close at a late hour. Some of them close at one, some of them close at two. And that's fine.

Just that little period of closing, saves you so much because now there's time to come back in and meal prep. The staff gets to rest. There's no 1 a.m. to 7 a.m. I know that I'm getting the best and brightest of that time period when that shift starts. Like, no, you're getting a shift. That's it. If your shift is from 12 to 12. Some of the worst service I've had is in a restaurant that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the restaurant that's the that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the that's that's that's the the the that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that's is that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's tha tha. that's tha. that's tha'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a' thasf.a'a'a'a'a'a' to to to to to to thea' 12, some of the worst service I've had is in a restaurant that's empty in the middle of the afternoon. An empty restaurant at 4 p.m. is the worst service I get every time. But this I will say, yeah. It's let's not act like that Waffle House is not contributing to the community at large because

have you, hold on, have you heard of the Waffle House Hurricane Index? I've heard of the Waffle House Hurricane Index. You can tell it for the people, for the people that don't know, but I'm already with you, okay, I'll let you tell it. Let me, let me give the folks the full Googleable definition. Straight from your Wikipedia page, okay? The Waffle House index is an informal metric named after the Waffle House restaurant chain to determine the effect of a storm and the likely scale of assistance required for disaster recovery. It was coined by former administrator Craig Fugate of the Federal Emergency Management Agency aka FEMA. The metric is unofficially used by FEMA to inform disaster response. So the index is based on Waffle House's

reputation for having good disaster preparedness, staying open during extreme weather or reopening quickly afterwards. Now if you get there and the, now this is the quote from Craig Fugate, former head of the federal emergency management agency, aka FEMA. If you get there and the waffle house is closed question mark that's really bad is what the man is quoted as saying now there are levels to this shit green full menu restaurant has power and damage is limited or no or don't damage at all yellow limited, no power or only power from a generator or food supplies may be low. Red, the restaurant is closed, indicates severe damage or severe flooding.

Now, if you can tell me of any other restaurant, store, business, or food chain that is being used by a federal preparedness agency, I will be glad to hear it. Go ahead. Go ahead. All that you have proven just now is that FEMA is in shambles. Shut the hell up. Because if FEMA is leading our waffle house, you know FEMA's not doing well.

It's an informal, it basically, it's like, okay, this is a colloquial kind of, it's like, you know how like all the birds fly away before a tsunami comes? Yeah. No one's looking to birds. There was a tsunami comes? Yeah. Yeah. No one's looking to birds. There was an earthquake. A tsunami's coming. But if these birds fly to coop, that's your indicator. You see what I'm saying?

If you tell me Waffle House is closed, because the weather is so bad, I'm gonna go, oh shit. We got to get the hell up out of here here, you, you, you the window, you the window, th, the window, th, th, the window, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, th gonna go, oh shit, we got to get the hell up out of here. I already boarding up my windows, batting down the hatches, right? But if you took, but if I see on the news, that the Waffle House is closed, I'm fleeing the city. I've already put my boards up, I've already done all my stuff.

But if a wafo house is closed, I'm like, damn, this storm is badder than I thought it was. This is worse than, this is worse than I thought it was. If anything, this is an indication that Waffle Houses stay too open. That's not, that doesn't make any sense. It makes total sense. A place should open and close in a way that isn't such an indicator. It would be like saying, oh, I know, I know this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this this this this this this this this tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, oh, I know this guy, right? This gentleman who does a lot of drugs. We all do.

And usually is not concerned about anything in life. So then if he gets concerned, you know it's bad. It's like, yeah, but also, his level of concern doesn't really peak my interest because he's dealing with a whole bunch of other stuff over there. I understand the- So you're saying Waffle House is a drug addict? No, no, I'm not saying Waffle House is a drug addict.

I'm saying that it shouldn't take a hurricane to break through normal procedure. I think that maybe. What do you think should be, you don't think any restaurant should be open 24 hours not not I'm not saying any and every I'm just saying for the sake of just when I go to a waffle house for the sake of everyone there I think it would be best if this place closed for four hours I don't know like like to know I have been I have been the one where they were we walked in and like we're closed and we went your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. the. there. there. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. the like to know I have been I have been the one where they were we walked in and like we're closed and we went your waffle house yeah yeah so maybe there are some out there I just don't know about no I think they just decided they were done like that's the other thing it's like they just they just decided

they needed a break because she's like I'm we're closed and I was like you're like the reason they were closed is because they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th th th th th th the the the the th the the the thtook they they they they they they they they they And she was like, but the reason they were closed is because they had just gotten robbed. So then we had to go to the Waffle House across the street. Nah, the reason, no, don't do that. So you know the 24-hour McDonald's, you know, after a certain time you can't go inside? Yeah. It's because people were robbing 24-hour McDonald's. So that's why you can't go inside. Yeah. The reason that certain Popeyes and certain neighborhoods have the check cash and place glass, because that's why you know what kind of neighborhood you're in, if you're not sure what kind of neighborhood you're in,

going to a fast food restaurant, especially like a Popeye is like a church's chicken. A church's chicken should already tell you what neighborhood you're in. But if you're confused, go inside said church's chicken. If there is check cashing place glass, you know where you are. And just for people who don't know, the check cashing place glass is not just a type of bulletproofish glass. It's also glass that has a little compartment in it so that you can put your money in and then turn it. And then they can put your product in and then turn it. Yes. That also stops hands from having to exchange. You know, because then with hands exchange,

it means they have easy access to you, which means they could bring and use a weapon. Right, so they can slide a gun underneath, they can grab you by your hand. But I can tell you, the food you get at a Popeye's or Church of Chicken with Cash and Place Glass, it's never as good as the experience of having to, it never matches up. It doesn't feel like, yeah, it feels the the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob the rob that that the rob that to, it never matches up. It does feel like, yeah, yeah, it feels like the robberies that took place there were four refunds. Jabby, like, like, the chicken that I've had.

No, give me my money back. Give me my money back. And they're like, I don't want all of the money. I want my 1162. That's all I want. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or experience. But not with Zip Recruiter finds amazing candidates for you fast. And right now you can try it for free at Zipruter.com.ziprecruiter's smart technology identifies top talent for your roles quickly.

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But is that really true? I'm Tim Harford, host of The Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring egos, and we'll delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper, and dare to confront a formidable empire.

The art of fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts. One of my homeboys was like, how can you do diners versus Waffle House? Waffle House is a diner. And I was like, but you know that Waffle House is Waffle House. Like, let's call a spade-to-spa. Yeah, yeah, it's essentially like a calling when people are like, actually dolphins are mammals. Yeah.

It's like, yeah, but, like the square rectangle thing. Yeah, because if I had the choice between a diner and a waff house, I'm going dinear every time. I'm going to waf house. I'm going to Waff House because it's like I know when I go to the Waff House 90% of the time I get two things. Okay when I go to a diner? No no no no what's your Waff House order? What's my Waff House? I guess I get the All Star thing. The All Star thing. Yeah, yeah the thing that is at the top of the menu I I think. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the th. the th. th. the the that's. that is at the top of the menu, I think. Okay, this is, okay, so what we've established here is you are not a person who goes to Waff House.

How you get your hash browns? I get them flat. I don't know what the... Listen, listen, listen. You have not been to enough waffle houses. You don't even have your hash brown order down? I've been a waffle houses. I get my hash browns in the way they come.

I don't ask them to be extra. You don't get your hash browns customized. No, because here's the thing. The hash browns that you get at a diner, you can just go crispy or you can go, hey, can you, you know, put a little gravy on it, whatever. The, the gravestation, I don't know what people do. I'm just saying. I put a hot sauce in a little syrup on mine.

On your hash browns? Just a smidge. Pepper. Yeah. A little hot sauce. Gotta go pepper. And just a little, just a little whipher. Just little, just little, you know, just petals.

Just petals, just petals, just a little bit of syrup. Just because like the whole milk just be like sometimes too salty but scattered smothered actually I get scattered smother covered or scattered smother covered and peppered I mean if you really got to cover up your hash browns like that you didn't do them right you know ma'am ma'am do you know what any of these words mean that I just said scattered so what when you get Waffle House hash browns, they'll come, they put them in the ring, so they'll be like formed, right? Yeah, yeah. I get mine scattered, so, because for me, when they're in the little ring, they're not all crispy because they're not. So I like mine scattered, so it's like a more surface area scattered smothered is with grilled onions covered is with cheese peppered is jalapenos

theyons like shot what it sounds like you can get them shot capped why they call them capped because it's mushrooms sounds like like shot shot's mushrooms. Just say with mushrooms. Listen, it's a whole little cute little thing. I'm trying to remember what the one when you put add gravy to it, what's it called? Maybe, maybe I'm just being biased, but I feel like when I go to a diner, I go to diner specifically for breakfast food, you know, so that's why I compared to a Waffle House in my mind because the same way that I go to Waffle House I get that All-Star, I go to a diner and I get, you know, two eggs, scramble with cheese, bacon, crispy, and I get a hash browns, and then some toast if they have it, and I'm easy. And I'll get some oranges. Yeah, but it's not, it's not the same, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to a to a to a to a to to a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a the the the the the toa, the toes, toa toa toa toa to. to. to. to. the to. toa. toa. toa. toa. to a to on touch maybe. Yeah, you can just get that at Walthouse. I don't understand what you're... But it's not the same. It's not, it's not like, I don't know how I describe

this in a way that won't maybe sum it all up. The way that it's done at a Waffle House, to me, is a bit too familiar, if that makes sense. So... Too familiar. Yeah, so, when, so, so, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's th, it's th, like, it's like, it's the same, it's not, it's not, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it, it's like, it's like, it's the same, it's the the same, it's the same, it's the the same, it's not, it's not, it's not, the same, the same, the same, the same, th. It's not like, th. It's not like, th. It's not like, the same, if that makes sense. So familiar. Yeah, so when I go to a waffle, you feel like you could cook it? Yeah, when I get my order, all breakfast food you can cook. Yeah, but there's something about some of the diners I've been to.

No, you can cook at, uh-uh, no, you can make your own eggs. We are not talking about, this is not French cuisine, this is not a soup du jour, okay? This is not a fine, no fine dining experience. Which all diners have, by the way. Let me say something. Is there a Michelin Star restaurant that's only doing breakfast. I mean not that I'm aware. Exactly, because it's eggs. It's eggs. It's fucking eggs. Okay.

If you think that you, every man makes breakfast, you know, I don't know if that's the only thing we teach all how to make as a society. I've made my breakfast. You understand? So it's like I, because like I love, you don't want to one of our favorite things. That would have a hard time to find in New York. Okay. Patty sausage.

I love a patty sausage. I don't know why I love a patty sausage. Wow. Okay, listen. Hash browns and waffels Scattered okay, yeah smothered with oven with onions covered with cheese Chunked grilled Hickory Smoked tamm diced grilled tomatoes peppered jalape diced

grilled tomatoes peppered jalapenos caped grilled button mushrooms Topped is with birch chili Country is when they got the sausage gravy on top or you could get all of them you can also get it in a double a triple or a quadruple order now. I don't know who's out here getting quadruple orders of hash browns, that sounds. I've seen it. I've seen it and you've all, and we've all gone. That's too much. That's too much. A double order?

Like it's like, if it's been all day and I was out, like, it's not often I'll get like gun fell out of his waistband. Like that's so funny. There was no room for the gun? There was no room for the gun anymore. So this dude, this new guy quadruple order hash browns ate them on. And when he got up, the gun was like, it's too tight. I can't be in there.

I just, I know there's people, I just, I therethere's people like listening that are just like, we are so casual about talking about a gun. And it's like, y'all have to remember, like, I grew up in Georgia, Josh grew up in Louisiana, and we both grew up in America. So if you have an issue with what we're talking about? Yeah. One you forgot where you live. You forgot where you live. I'm no sympathy for you. You forgot where the hell you live.

You need to calm down. You need to talk to your congressman. Make it so that's talking about a quete, when a pistol, that it's not so casual. But hey man, sometimes you're guns like, you know, I gotta, honestly, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's the strength, that's, that's, that's, that, I gotta, honestly, that lets you know the strength and the vigor of a Waffle House hash brown. If it's pushing guns out the waistband, come on, bro, come on. I mean, a gun falling to a, a gun falling to a tile floor has a very particular clatter that Yeah, everybody got real quiet

Oh, because you're like oh, that's not Okay, okay, we know we know we know Yeah, I was just like hey my bad. And then he was just like hey my bad and then then he tried to put it back and it was not going easy That gun did not want to get his waistband anymore. Oh, no. I was sure. I was sure he was sure. I was. I was. I was gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna. I was like. I was like. I was like. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, hey. Yeah, hey. Yeah, hey. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, hey, hey, everybody. Yeah, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, that, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, tried to put it back and it was not going easy. That gun did not want to get his waistband anymore. I thought, oh no. I was sure he was going to shoot himself. Like I was like, who's one of those things where he really like hiked up his chest and everything, try to make room and I was like, because like he can't hold it walking out. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Because it's going to look to look to look to look to look to look to look he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he heat. He was going heat. He was going heat. He was going heat. He was going heat. He was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he was going he's going he he. He's going he's going he's going he's going he's going he's going he's going he's going he's going. He's going. He's going. He's going he's going he's going he's going he's going to look. It's going to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look he was going he was going he. He's going. He's going to look crazy. Just, let's just, let's just recap and just think about this.

Okay. Uh-huh. Usually when we have these conversations, we can have things to say about the one thing and things to say about the other thing. We have been talking about Waffle House most of the time, because it's an engaging conversation, okay? Because we know that Waffle House is for the people, okay? I understand that we've let Waffle House dominate most of the conversation in this particular episode, but I think that it's because I really wanted to give you the time and attention for your Waffle House arguments to let you sort of like put yourself on the the grill

and get burned because I think that they're not coming out quite like you think they are okay I think that one of the reasons that Waffle House has been confined to the parts of the country that it has been is specifically because other states are like we see the problems and we don't th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th.. tho. tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. I th. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that's the the that's the the the the the the the the the the parts of the country that it has been is specifically because other states are like we see the problems and we don't want them. Okay, we see the issues. We see the issues. And we already have diners that are better. Don't bring that over here. Okay. Wow. I think that's what's happening. Wow. Mm-hmm. The disrespect. You know, that's all hearsay.

I have given you. That's not even hearsay. That's Josh said, okay? We don't know why these other states don't have a Waffle House. You don't know. We also know. No, no, no, you can't say that the reason Waffle House isn't in other states is because of their their thauauauauauinter. that's, that's, that's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, I I I I's, I's, I's, I's, I I's, I I I's, I I's, I I I's, I I's, I's, I I I's, I I's, I's, I's, I is. I's, thi. I's, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's thi. thi. that's that's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that the reason Waffle House isn't in other states is because of how Waffle House has been presented to the people, you're the proof for that. You don't know.

Okay. All right. In the words of my mama, you don't know, because you don't know. But I think that's because big diner, okay. Big diner, okay. Mm-hmm, is keeping out the little guy. The little guy. The little, the little mega corporation that FEMA uses to track how bad a storm is.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, you cannot use FEMA now. Why? Because you use, because you were like, the source is just closed. No, no, no, you can't use FEMA to defend your argument when you were just shitting on FEMA for using Waffle House being with FEMI, you can't do that. No. I can do both because the association is still there. That's not, no, no, no, that's not right. That's not right. I never denied that the association existed. I'm just saying it means FEMA is in shambles,

but it's also tracking something that's not a little guy. It's a mega corporation. So that's me throwing out my, there's more likely big waffle house than their is big diner. I think that there's too many many many many many many for them to form a coalition of eggs bacon and hash browns and And Monte Cristo sandwiches to keep out the wall houses Walthouse has the power and a stuffed flounder and you're Thanksgiving dinner and your calumari and I everything I've ever had at a diner tasted, reheated.

Is that hearsay? Is that hearsay? No, I've worked in a restaurant before and thought of you. I also worked in a restaurant, but I didn't know anything about once the chapters lengthen in the book of the menu. There's too much food. Your burgers might get in heavy rotation. Your breakfast stuff is definitely going, your eggs are going to constantly be going. Yeah. But.

Real eggs, by the way, not just a bunch of egg juice, right? Waffle House uses real eggs. Are we sure about that? You see the basket of eggs when they're cooking your breakfast. You see them cook. You see a basket of eggs. Do we see them use from that basket of eggs? You've never seen them use? Yes, Negro, watch them cook. You've never seen them cook?

I've seen them cook. They're right there. You're just being rude. Now, you know good and damn well they be using them eggs. You know good and damn well they be using them eggs. The eggs don't just sit there. You've seen them refill a basket, okay, how do we know those are plastic eggs? Get off my internet. Get off my You seem to reach up there. How do we know that they're on Easter buddy white eggs? Get off my internet. Get off my internet. I will not do this with you. You can see them take the egg out the basket, crack it, put it in a bowl of eggs or

put it directly on the grill where some person is going to have just a raw, sunny side. Ashy. Yeah. No, no, no. yeah I'm it's you know hearsay because you said I heard it wow okay no no no you had your Josh say I had my dual say so I will not be I mean now we have to give it to the people all right we have to give it to the people it's are you team because this is diners and so this is diners and so this is diners the they. So this is diners the th. the the the the the th. th. So th. So th. So th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. this is this is th. this is this is th. this is this is this is. It's. thi. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. th. It's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th is. th is. th is. th is. th is. th. th. th. th. th. th. this is this is this is this is th. th. this is th. this. this is this is this. this is this is this is this is this is. this is. this is. this is. th. th. th. th. it to the people. All right? Now we have to give it to the people. It's are you team? Because this is diners and so this is diners mean like any restaurant ends in the word diner or are we including I happen to any are those diners? Personally I find them to be diners. I know a steak and shake is a diner. Yeah. I think when we were talking about this. I don't I know I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th, I th, I th. th, I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. their their the. the. their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. and shake is a diner. Yeah. I think when we were talking about this, I don't I know I wasn't considering the IHOPs or the Denny's. I was thinking Waffle House versus your true true diners. Okay so this is what we'll do just make it clear for the people as we wrap up all right. Okay. When we go diners versus waf House, what I want you to keep in mind is that we're just

talking about diners, like not chains, so you know, you don't have to give up your Golden Corral, your Denny's, your Ihobs or anything. We're just going to have Indy Diners versus Waffle House as an institution, okay? I will say in the end, I can give you a little bit of ground that Waffle House has a level of consistency that I appreciate. It also has a level of calm, even in the chaos that I appreciate. Because when that dude's gun fell, it was like, it was kind of nothing. Like we all stopped, but it was kind of nothing. Whereas I think in a diner someone would have run. Yes, because I'm sure the employees were the people that cared

the least that a gun just hit the floor. But I can't say the number of times I've seen a fight in a waffle house. It's been less than 10, calm down. I've never been worried. Like I was in a, I saw a fight in an Iop, but I, but I, but I, but I was like, but I was like, they they was like, they was like, they was like, they was like, they, they were, they were, they were, they were, they, they were, they were, they were like, they were like, they were like, they were like, they were like, they're, they're, they're like, they're like, they're, they were, they were, they were, they were, they were, they were, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, I saw a fight in an IHOP and I was like, well, we need to run. Yeah. They're fighting in an IHOP? This is, this is a wild situation, right? They mean it.

Like if I walked into somewhere and been like, there's fight energy in here. Like there's just like... Yeah, if I walk in and I smell, um, like, the room smell, their, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's just, there's just, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they're, they're they're they're, they're, they're, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their th. We're th. We're fighting, th. We're fighting, their their th. We're fighting, their fighting, their they're their their their their the room smell spilled Tennessee, I think that there's definitely something that's about to, something either already happened or something's about to happen. Like when you smell dark liquor in a room, just like, like, yeah, and you smell it like off the floor, like not, I'm not talking about on people's breath or like pouring drinks or, I'm talking about the whole room has a hint. You're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm thi, I'm thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th I'm talking about the whole room has a hint you're like no we got to go I just want to thank everyone for

listening I appreciate the the points that you made and I hope you can see where I'm coming from that diners are far superior and you you were not able to prove you did not present any evidence to prove that diners are superior all you did you try to bad mouth the waffle house you you you you you you you you you you you the the the to the to the the to the to to the the to the to to the the the the to the the to the the the to to the to go off off off off off off off off off of the the the to go. to go. to go go go go go. to go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go to go to go to go. to go. the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the all you did was try to badmouth the waffle house you didn't give me anything to do all you said was diners have a lot of options and I order food like a child so we're gonna hand it over to you the listener all right we appreciate you we appreciate you we thank you for tuning in thank you for listening to hold up it's always great to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th the. the. thea. try. try. try. try. try. try. ttry. try. try. thtry. the. the. the the the the. thank you for tuning in. Thank you for listening to Hold Up. It's always great to get Josh being wrong on wax. And...

I'm Dulce Song. I'm Josh Johnson. This has been hold up. Hey, make sure you vote correctly. God's watching. Listen to Hold Up wherever you get your podcast and watch the video version at Daily Show. Dotcom, backslash hold up. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show, wherever you get your podcast. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Do nice guys really finish last.

I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new mini-series on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti, we'll examine villains undone by their villainy, monstrous self-devaring egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.