The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Everything Is Stupid - America Has a Problem with Food

Episode Date: January 12, 2023

Ronny Chieng spotlights frivolous lawsuits against food giants, including absurd cases being brought against Godiva, TGI Friday’s and Poland Spring.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Thank you. America has a problem with food. You guys want your food to be cheap and fast, but also to be fresh and healthy. That's too many things, okay? You can't have both. It's like racial diversity at a ski lodge. It doesn't exist. And when Americans don't get everything they expect from their food, you end't have both. It's like racial diversity at a ski lodge. It doesn't exist

And when Americans don't get everything they expect from their food, you end up with dumb lawsuits like this one The Reading Eagle reports on a five million dollar class action lawsuit that accuses Godiva of misleading consumers. The suit says Godiva's packaging reads Belgium 1926 implying the chocolate is made there when it's actually made in Reading, Pennsylvania Gada says the Belgian brand is proud of its roots and the company. the company. the company. the company. the company. the company. the company the company the company. the company. the company the company. the company's the company's the company's the company's the company's the th. th. thii. thi. thii. thiii. thi's thii's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. I I I I I I I I I I th. I I I th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. I thi. It's. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. I thi. I'm thi. I'm thiiiiii. I'm thii. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thia. I'm th's actually made in Reading, Pennsylvania. Godiva says the Belgian brand is proud of its roots and the company's logo reflects the spirit. Come on, guys, you're telling me that Americans care that the chocolate isn't from? I'll give you the money myself if you can show me where Belgium is on the map. But also, Godiva, why are you tricking people about where your chocolate is from? Nobody cares.

You can say that it was made in Bernie Sanders' shoe and people would still eat it. People love chocolate so much that Willy Wonka killed kids and we didn't even care. Because he made chocolate. Americans are so entitled. Not only does a cheap food have to be exotic. They also want it to be organic, like this lady. A Bronx woman is suing TGI Fridays Friday toee-Iaaaaa. toe toe toe toe toe. toe. theira. t. t. th. th. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. I. I. G. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. to. to. to. t. to. t. t. I. I. I. I. I. G. G. G. G. G. to be organic like this lady. A Bronx woman is suing TGI Fridays for five million dollars claiming the restaurant's potato skin snacks aren't actually made of potatoes. The potato skin snacks come in bags are sold in stores and vending machines across the country. The woman

says she bought the snack at a Bronx bodega but says she wouldn't have made the purchase if she knew the product didn't contain real potato. She claims the food is misbranded and not as the the the the the the the the the the product didn't contain real potatoes. She claims the food is misbranded and not as healthy as the restaurant's popular appetizer. Okay, so I get where this lady is coming from. I would also be pissed because you can't sell a snack called potato skins if it doesn't have any potatoes in it. Okay? Imagine if you got tickets to be Beyonce concert and when you got there, I came out. You'll be furious. Why? Because you're not ready for the jelly.

Ugh. But still, how is this lady suing for five million dollars? Like how much did she spend on these potato skins? Four dollars? Okay, well then she gets the four dollars back, okay? In fact, you know what, here's a ten. Okay, go by yourself, 30 seconds of therapy. I mean honestly who is expecting food from TGI Fridays they give you two appetizers, two entrees and two desserts all for 20 bucks. That's not a meal that's a yard sale. Again we don't need a lawsuit just give the lady her money back and TGI Fridays you can still call them potato skins. You just have to put a question mark at the end. Yeah, that way, you're not just selling a snack,

you're selling a mystery. Seriously, America, you can't keep suing everything, okay? Just accept the fact that everyone is lying to you. Companies are lying to you, the government is lying to you, your wife is cheating on you with me. Nothing is real, okay? You can't even trust water. A judge has given new life to a class action lawsuit accusing Poland Spring of selling water that's sourced from wells and not springs.

He ruled last week that an amended complaint can proceed with claims in eight states. Poland Springs, corporate parent, Connecticut-based Nestle Waters North America reiterated Tuesday that it's a meritless lawsuit and said the judge's decision doesn't undermine its confidence. That's right, a woman is mad that Poland Spring Water doesn't come from a spring, comes from a well. Yeah I just told the people in Flint, Michigan about this story and they said to go f-hick yourself. Seriously! Who actually thinks Poland spring water comes from a spring in Poland? Do you also think your smart water went to MIT?

It's all marketing. Although, to be fair, CVS water does come from CVS. Okay? It's locally sourced from the CVS breakroom toilet. Look, I think America would have fewer lawsuits if people were more skeptical of what they put in their bodies in the first place. If you ask me, this is a scheme people are using to try and get rich, which is why I'm also

joining in. Trevor, I am suing you. Consider yourself, sir. What? Why? Because the food you left in the fridge today wasn't organic, and I almost didn't finish it. Wait, what do you mean the food? That was my food. You ate my lunch, Ronnie. That was my lunch!

Trevor, we'll let the courts decide. Ronnie Chang, everybody. Watch the Daily Show, weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.