The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Fauci Takes the 5th Amendment While MAGA Cracks His Diary Open & Calls Him Hitler | Theo Baker

Episode Date: July 31, 2026

Dr. Anthony Fauci testified before the Senate in the GOP's hyperpartisan investigation into his "megalomania" and alleged mishandling of Covid, despite the fact that Trump admitted to having “a lot of respect for Dr. Fauci” during the pandemic. Jordan Klepper gets into the hearing’s biggest moments, including Fauci repeatedly invoking the Fifth Amendment, Senator Josh Hawley invoking Fauci’s diary entries, and one Instagram commenter invoking the eggplant emoji. In honor of America's 250th birthday, Michael Kosta hit the streets of NYC to ask his fellow citizens a simple question: Who is the greatest American of all time? The answers poured in, and boy were they wrong. It's John Motherf**king Stamos! Luckily, Stamos himself happened to be there to help a starstruck Kosta set the record straight. Thanks, Uncle Jesse! Theo Baker, award-winning journalist and bestselling author of "How to Rule the World: An Education in Power at Stanford University,” chats with Jordan Klepper about his freshman year research misconduct investigation into Stanford University President Marc Tessier-Lavigne, which led to his resignation in 2023. They talk about Stanford’s “Faustian bargain” with Silicon Valley, the incredible money and power thrust into undergraduates’ hands, and how Baker convinced sources to tell a teenager their secrets. -- New customers can save 35% on your first month of subscription by going to https://dosedaily.co/TDS or entering TDS at checkout. -- The Daily Show airs weeknights at 11/10c on Comedy Central. Stream full episodes on Paramount+ Follow TDS: YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central. It's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Jordan Clever. We're talking about tonight. Republicans are still stuck in 2020. Anthony Fauci's social distances himself from questions, and we reveal the greatest American of all time. Shocker, it's not a gun made of ground beef. So, let's get into the headlines.

America, do you guys remember COVID, that thing that briefly turned humans everywhere into alcoholic indoor cats? Remember that era where we lost friends and family to the Joe Rogan experience? We were trying to flatten the curve or Delta, the Omicron, or whatever the f*** we were trying to do. Regardless, I know that Republicans,

remember COVID, because ever since the pandemic, they've been calling for the arrest of Dr. Anthony Fauci, who spearheaded America's COVID response. And this week, one of his biggest haters escalated things. Senator Rand Paul has released Anthony Fauci's diary entries. Oh! Oh! Dr. Fauci's diaries are out in the open for anyone to read.

It's going to have all the juice, the evidence, and reveal which variant he had a crush on. Oh. Now, if Rand Paul released Fauci's diaries, they must reveal something incriminating. So, let's hear what Dr. Anthony Fauci was trying to keep secret. Fauci writing, it is not hyperbole to say that today I am the most famous and talked about person in the country and one of the most recognizable. Yeah, it's not really a secret. Everyone knew, everyone knew that.

I mean, I literally saw Fauci more than I saw my parents. Mostly because they couldn't figure out how to turn on the Zoom camera. What else you got? He said, quote, the press still hot and heavy about me, multiple stories per day directly or indirectly involving me. Yeah. Again, he was famous. We know that.

A lot of us had Fauci fever. I mean, the pandemic made us say crazy things or wear crazy things, you know? Come on. Come on. I'm looking for something with substance, not just embarrassing gossip. In another diary entry, Tony is writing about an Instagram post with supermodel Tyra Banks. And Tony Fauci wrote, quote, One person said that Tyra was very sexy, but that I was even more sexy than she was.

Come on. Are we supposed to be surprised that Fauci wrote about being called sexier than Tyra Banks? If someone called me sexier than Tyra Banks, I'd write that in my diary. You know what? I write about being called sexier than Carlton Banks. I might even write about being compared favorably to a Bank of America. I have very low self-esteem. Honestly, this just sounds like an old man not realizing how unhinged Instagram comments can be. Then another commenter used an eggplant and a water-splashing emoji to, from what I understand, emulate an ejaculating penis.

Needless to say, a great honor. Look, Rand Paul, Dr. Paul, DJ, Pauley Rand, we don't care about Fauci's interactions with celebrities. Give us some entries with answers. Had great call with Barbara Streisand. I told her that I work listening to her songs on Alexa. She really did not know what Alexa was. I accidentally butt called her later in the evening. You butt dialed the Barbara Streisand, the funny girl, the Dolly Levi,

THE Gental Mendel, the Esther Hoffman Howard. So basically, these diary entries didn't reveal any shocking revelations about Fauci's criminal negligence or intent. But that didn't stop Republicans from dragging Fauci into Congress yesterday and grandstanding on it. Somewhere along the line, it became all about you.

You became a narcissist and a megalomaniac and a liar. And you've lied to the American people and you've lied to this body. Wow. Strong starts. Senator Josh Howley, and by the way, I love the hair. Something about that hair.

It just makes you look super cool, man. And smart. No notes. All you need to do now is bring it home. You know, hit him with a closing line that makes everyone stand up and cheer. You've done more to harm science than anybody in my lifetime, and I hope you'll go home and write that in your diary. Thank you, Mr. Chairman.

Is this thing on? Is this thing not on? Let's see, let's see. Anyone here been to Wuhan? Anybody? Anybody? Of course, Republicans weren't just there for political theater. They were hoping to get Fauci to say something on the record that they could use to incriminate him.

Unfortunately, for them, Fauci had an answer for everything. Excuse me. One answer for everything. Are you disappointed how you handle COVID? Do you have any regrets? On the advice of counsel, I respectfully declined to answer based upon my rights under the Fifth Amendment to the Constitution. On the advice of counsel, I respect to...

respectfully, respectfully declined, decline to answer under the Fifth Amendment. I respectfully declined to answer. What color tie you're wearing? On the advice of counsel, I respectfully decline to answer. Oh, you won't talk, huh? Don't worry, boys. I got a question for him.

Dr. Fauci. What's your favorite Barbara Streisand song? I respectfully declined to answer. Damn it! He's good. He's very good. So, Fauci answered every question by invoking his right to remain silent.

Well, nice try, Doc. but your silence speaks volumes. I'm no body language expert, but we're going to have one in a few minutes. Let me show you this. You ever see Mr. Burns on The Simpsons? I still love The Simpsons, and he did this thing with the hands a lot.

Fingertips on fingertips. What do you make of that? It says something. It has to say something, right? Otherwise, this whole segment would be stupid. I'd look like the biggest dip shit on TV. And while I have a body language expert here, the president going like this, that's normal, right?

Right? It has to be. This is weird. Normal. Weird, normal? You know, I'm getting confused here. I'm getting confused. What is it that Dr. Fauci did that is so heinous

that you are still trying to get him six years afterwards? Well, he did fund gain-of-function research at a sloppy lab, where a virus escaped and left a million Americans dead. Complicit in the deaths of millions of people. killed or had something to do with killing nine million people. Okay, wow, that's right. Okay, he engineered the virus that killed millions and millions of people because it was so deadly, a threat to everyone.

The COVID virus was simply not a threat to most people. Oh, my spidey senses about him, about the entire scam-demic, were accurate. A lot of us that COVID was a flu. To tell kids they couldn't go to school, for years for no reason. Dr. Fauci lied about his own personal views, shutting down the country for a virus he knew wasn't that deadly. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

See? It's deadly. And it didn't matter. And millions died, but it was fine. And, God, my head... Oh, it hurts, okay? My ears are bleeding, and are those symptoms of the deadly virus? That doesn't matter? I just don't understand.

Can someone try again to tell us what was in these diaries? entries. If you read the stories in the so-called mainstream press about the Fauci Diaries, you will see an exact parallel to the Biden... I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I can't hear you over the pipe.

What's going on here? Are you guys? Are you guys trying to solve COVID or a murder on the Orient Express? But I know about Dr. Fauci shall we retire to the hot tub, my dear boys. Chubchap! Listen, guys. Can we dial this back a bit?

I'm not saying Anthony Fauci made no mistakes, but it's not like the man is Hitler. Fauci's guilty of mass murder and crimes against humanity on a scale of a Hitler and a Joseph Mangala. Okay. I stand corrected. Fun fact, Hitler also committed all his crimes to meet Barbara Streisand.

Fun fact. By the way, if you think America's response to COVID was really that horrible, is there someone other than Fauci you might put some blame on. Maybe somebody Fauci worked for. Could even be somebody you may have met one or two or three or five times.

Maybe a little turn around the room might jog your memory, no? Donald Frikan Trump. He was the guy who was president during the pandemic, and he also thought Fauci was sexier than Tymer Banks. He's a good man. I like Dr. Fauci a lot. He's been doing a very good job. We're very happy with Dr. Fauci.

I have a lot of respect for Dr. Fauci. And I have to pay tribute, we have, whether it's after Fauci, we have the best people on Earth. Normally when Trump praises something like that, that highly, he just had his broker by a ton of stock in it. Look, this is not to say Donald Trump

is the one big villain of COVID. There is no one big villain of COVID. Well, except maybe, He was a bad dude. It was an unprecedented pandemic that we spent years stumbling through, trying to find some patchwork of solutions that would protect our health while keeping our society from total collapse. Did our leaders make mistakes? Of course they did.

Should we try to find out what we did? Wrong, of course. But that was not what was happening with Republicans this week. They were doing the only thing we do anymore. Shove a complex issue through a performative partisan filter. But it's not going to do anything for us to throw Anthony Fauci in prison. It's not even going to do that much to Anthony Fauci. I mean, threatening an 85-year-old with life in prison

that's kind of like putting a kid in timeout 10 minutes before school is over. In fact, coding public health as a partisan issue is incredibly dangerous because we've already seen what happens when a party comes in thinking that public health is the other party's issue. The Trump administration has started carrying out mass layoffs at the Department of Health and Human Services. will impact roughly 3,500 workers at the FDA, 2,400 at the CDC, and 1,200 at the NIH. Cancelling almost $500 million in funding for 22 projects focused on developing MRNA vaccines. An office established to prepare the nation for future pandemics is reportedly down to just one staffer.

The source says it's not clear who that person reports to. There's one guy left. This is why we are losing a Diary Award to lettuce. So here's the point, America. How about instead of looking for partisan scapegoats for the last pandemic, how we for once work together to find out how we could focus

at preventing the next one? I think that, that's, that is a plan even Dr. Fauci could agree with. What do you say, Doc? I respectfully declined to answer. Gotcha. saving it for the diary. I get it. We come back, we find out who's the greatest America of all time.

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greatest American. Well, Michael Costa found out. In honor of America's 250th birthday, I'm hitting the streets of New York City to ask Americans who they think the greatest American of all time is. And there's only one right answer. Who is the greatest American of all time? I think it's Lana though, right? John Brown. I would say Teddy Roosevelt. No.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt? No, no more Roosevelt. LeBron Games. LeBron James, it's pretty good. It's pretty good. But no. It's so obvious. It's got to be Conan O'Brien.

I didn't say who was your favorite. It's the greatest American of all time. John, motherfucking, Stamos. That's right. The Greatest American of All Time is obviously actor, musician, and everyone's Celebrity Hall Pass, John Stamos. Have mercy.

Troy, where are you from? I'm from Reno, Nevada. Who is the greatest American of all time? Duke Ellington. I'm thinking of someone else, maybe someone could be alive, could be someone in your field of vision, could be everywhere you look.

You know who that is? I don't. Go back to Reno. Go back to Reno, Troy. Well, I can tell you who the greatest American isn't. Who's that? Troy. I can't believe you're here, man.

I mean, we've been talking about you all day. I just can't believe. You only DMed me about 40 times. You emailed me, you text. I don't know how you got my number, but I got a bunch of texts from you. Who's America's favorite uncle? Maybe, maybe Sam?

No. Professor? Professor? Professor? No? Uncle Joe Joey?

He wasn't an uncle on me. Uncle Jesse. Say Uncle Jesse. Uncle Jesse. Right. Look at this. This is it. Uncle Jesse.

I'm going to say Barack Obama. I'm thinking more someone who's TV star may have played the bongoes with the Beach Boys. Initials J.S. I don't really know. I don't really know him. You don't need... John Stamos. Uncle Jesse?

I heard of the name. He's gone. I know the name. Every single person that has talked about the greatest America of all kind, John Stamos is connected to them. Wow.

Give me a name. Bruce Springsteen? Bruce Springsteen. I played with Bruce Springsteen. He played drums with Ruth Springsteen. Give me another one. Lincoln? Lincoln.

What did I do? Abraham Lincoln was the president. So was Ronald Reagan. John Stamos played the campaign manager for Ronald Reagan in his biopic. Wow. It's like, and bacon. Except it's John Stamos.

Right. Can we get a picture? Oh, you want to do a pick. Sure, let's do a pick. Yeah. Oh, sure. Okay. I'll take it. I got it. John Stamos, you know. Here we go. I can do selfies too if anybody wants. Does anybody want to do a selfie? Okay. Unbelievable. I hold a baby and people call the FBI.

Look at this. I'm a baby whisper. You are a baby whisper. Come here, how are we doing, okay? Costa, what do you do it? Let's see. He sees fidgety. Here, here. Well, no, but take the baby because she's trying. I guess I'm not good with babies. Not as good as John Stamos.

Tell me, greatest American of all time. I have a picture to show you. The picture. It's that guy right there. Hey, that's me. What? She has a picture with me. She has a picture.

It was in 2015. 2015. I got to spend all day with you, man. I can't believe it. John Stamos. Thank you for having me. I'm going to grab a beer next door. I don't have time for that.

I'm going to split, but thank you. You got to get lunch. You might as well come. I'm not that hungry. Thanks. Yo! Can I borrow your bike? Thank you. John Stamos.

I love you, man. Love you. John motherfuckin' stamos. We're going to get a beer later. Maybe, possibly. I love John Stamos. Have mercy. The Rosenmandel blackout curtains in gray.

But a price on sleep, but we did. Why are you in my room? Sheik exam tomorrow. Shop back to... An education and power at Stanford University. Welcome. Theo Baker. This book, I can't stop talking about this book. You're 22 years old? 21. You're 21 years old. I can drink at least. You can drink. Oh, very good. Is that a proposition? You know, it's now that I'm out of college, it's not as attractive. I mean, you know.

Yeah. Unless you're pushing back against something, what does it mean anymore, right? You're 21 years old. Yeah. You wrote this book about your freshman year at Stanford. It's remarkable. You've described this as three books in one. Give us a breakdown of what those books are. Yeah, yeah. So I went to Stanford as a coder, right? I thought I was going to be part of the whole milieu of the kids who were making the startups and changing the world and all that stuff. And so this book is part of this sort of insider cultural ethnography, this look at this really bizarre insider world that controls so much influence over our technology. It's part that. Part of it is this investigative drama as I start looking into the research of the president of Stanford University, eventually leading not to spoil the outcome with his resignation. And then the third part of the book, is sort of a building's remand of source, right? I, you know, thought I was gonna do, see us, got dragged into journalism. A lot of weird stuff happened along the way.

Yeah, yeah. You take down the president of Stanford in this thing. Weird stuff. Weird stuff. I was doing very similar things when I was 18 as well. You know, we had a real activist improv group at my college. It's a lot, this starts off, you don't go in thinking you're gonna jump into journalism,

and then you write this story on the war on woke that was happening on campus. Talk to me a bit about that. Yeah, so I thought I would join the student newspaper on a lark, and the war on fun was my first big story. This is the crackdown on all facets of student life. Now, to host something at Stanford, right? You have to take a class and pass an exam

to be able to apply three weeks in advance to the party review committee, which is a great acronym for what it is, the PRC, which only meets once a week on Tuesdays to approve all student events. I really love that detail on Tuesdays, right? They only meet on Tuesdays. And the six university departments say, hey, are your, you know, few balloons going to cause too much of a fire risk?

Of course, the end result of that is the sort of death of many of the casual social interactions that many people come to college expecting. Yeah, I mean, when you were going to college, were you hoping for just a fun experience to kind of let your hair down and be a normal college kid? Yeah, yeah. And you're like, oh, now I need to take down bureaucracy and go after the man. Look, I mean, I was, I was, you know, a nerd, obviously. I think, you know, I was the kind of kid who would like, like, I would, like, work on a machine learning model in high school and call that, like, a fun Friday night. And, you know, I've learned. That was me in college, but not high school.

Yeah. I've learned something of the folly of my ways. But it was really weird because it was my sort of first brush with the corporatization of the modern university, right? That student actually, right, we're teenagers. We're going about the ordinary course of coming of age. But at Stanford, your commodity, too. something to be monetized and a huge amount of money can be made off of these promising 17 and 18-year-olds. It was shocking to read about it. I'm a father in thinking about college for my kid way down the line.

And to hear about, like, you arrive at Stanford and essentially all these venture capitalists are throwing just gobs of money at the students. And there tend to be these small groups within the university that essentially are picking who is going to be the billionaires of tomorrow. And not even tomorrow. Like, this is happening today, right? Were you shocked by, you? just how cutthroat it became and the money that was there? No, the money is outrageous. And it's really just, it's bizarre because it's vested in the hands of teenagers. Like the kid who taught me out of shotgun

a beer freshman year, the frat guy, really bad influence. Not at all. No, he's a great guy, but he drops out and he starts a company. And six months later, it's valued at a billion dollars for this 15-person team of 20-year-olds. And, you know, all power to the guy.

I hope he succeeds, but... Oh, he already has. Well, there you go. Yeah. But it's amazing, right? For a certain cohort of students, right, those who are tapped on the shoulder and plucked from the crowd, those who are deemed the builders, not the want entrepreneurs, right? The people who are just doing it because they think they can. There are yacht parties.

There are slush funds. And the newest new thing when I arrived at Stanford was something called pre-idea funding. This I want to know more about because I have no ideas. And if I can monetize that, that would be perfect. What is pre-idea funding? Pre- Idea funding is really what it sounds like. Even though it sounds absurd, it is exactly what these people are doing. They will say, hey, here's a one-page or two-page agreement.

It's called a safe check. And if you make a company with it, call us, you know, and we'll invest more. It doesn't give them a particular amount of equity in the company. It guarantees them the right to purchase more in the future. And if you don't end up creating the company with it or collapse, it never has to be paid back. This is remarkable. There's so many themes in here. It makes me think a lot about AI.

and how much money is being spent on the possibility of something else but nothing actually being made? And then this sort of dovetails with what you discovered was Stanford's president at the time. When did you catch a whiff that something was awry? Yeah. So I was a few weeks into freshman year and had written a few stories for the school newspaper.

And I got wind of these anonymous posts that had taken place seven years earlier on this forum called PubPier. This is where scientists dissect published research papers. And they said, hey, there are some images in these papers that were co-authored by Stanford's then-president, Marc Tesset Levine. Because he was a neuroscientist.

He is a famous neuroscientist and an extremely wealthy entrepreneur. This guy's worth hundreds of millions of dollars. And I discovered over the course of about eight months of investigative journalism a pattern of falsified research that had emerged under his purview at different labs and that at various places, as the eventual Stanford investigation concluded, when he was given the opportunity to correct the scientific record, he failed to decisively and forthrightly do so. And we're talking about Alzheimer's research,

that as you're looking closer and closer, it just doesn't add up. Right. So one of the big stories that I reported on was this famous study that had claimed to identify the cause of Alzheimer's disease. So they're pumping this up at a shareholder meeting at the time, and this executive Richard Scheller calls it the greatest discovery made in Alzheimer's research

in 20 years, maybe ever. And as I discovered in my research, of course, that was not exactly what the paper ended up being. Now, you're doing research here, but you're a college student. You're calling around checking sources. Like, what is it like being a, a member, a journalist, but a journalist for a college paper trying to get people to talk to you? Does that make it easier in some ways because people are gracious to a college student? Or are you getting your, are you getting doors shut in your face all the time? I had more than a few doors slammed in my face. Absolutely. You know,

it's a really weird thing to say, hey, I'm a 17-year-old, and then an 18-year-old, and you should trust me with your secrets, right? Like, you should tell me these things that that you You signed NDAs not to tell people about maybe, you know, that you, you know, I'm someone that wants to listen and hear what is there. You know, it takes time to build credibility. But basically, I think what I discovered, the main lesson I took away from freshman years that, like, journalism, more than anything else, is a disposition, right? And it's, I think you, you know, in your interviews are demonstrating that better than so

many of us journalists, too, too. Oh, you misunderstand this completely. I thought you are showing your youth there, Theo. I thought you were sharper than that. Well, that's kind of you to say. It's curious, you come from your parents, our famous journalists. I'm curious what they thought about you going down this path. My parents are endlessly supportive.

There is a reason that I wanted to go 3,000 miles away from home and study computer science. You know, it was really funny. So I came back at Thanksgiving, and I said, hey, I've been working on this investigation into the president. And I've been working with these forensic image analysts, and there might be something there. And my dad, you know, is a lovely, lovely guy. And he said, very intelligently. He said, this is a world-renowned scientist and you're a 17-year-old kid. Like, maybe start with a professor.

And I didn't listen then, but, you know, my parents have been super supportive. And I'm lucky. I know it's not popular right now. I know journalism doesn't always get the great reputation that I might like. but it is a special thing to be a 17-year-old and to feel as if you can ask questions of people in power and hopefully do some good for your community by doing so. It's truly remarkable.

I'm curious, though, and I think I very much enjoyed about in reading it is following you through the journalistic process. You know, so many books drop you in the middle of people have been doing this for so long, and you're remarkably astute in doing it, but we sort of watch you find break and find your break stories and also find your footing as to how to tell these stories.

All the while, you are investigating the president of Stanford, writing about the president of Stanford. You just graduated from Stanford. I did. What is it like going to school at the place that you are investigating? It's weird, right? It's, you know, in some ways, right, I'm lucky. Like, at Stanford, there are students who are, like, actually famous, right?

Like, Eileen Goo is my classmate. You know, like, I think when her birthday, her last birthday, they put her face up on all the billboards in Times School. So I was more like a zoo animal, which is sort of a... It's a weird position to be in. There are a lot of eyes, especially because I didn't mean to be a journalist. I really, like, did not set out to be in this position. Why didn't you just pick the Acapella group, man, right?

I don't think I have the voice for it. I hate to say it. But look, it's also a really special thing to belong to a community that you care about. I've loved Stanford since I was seven years old. That's what I fell in love with Stanford. And, you know, I think if you love a place, you want it to be better. And that was a lot of the reason why I stuck it out and why, you know, it was important for me to put out this book while I was still a student there, not to do the thing where you leave

and you dish on all the people you've just been friends with. It's like, no, this is what I've encountered. This is what my reporting shows, and I think it's important to talk about it. Now, you just graduated. I'm curious, what is next? Is it grad school? I can't imagine any school would want you to come. Yeah.

Prince of Brits. A little tough. Sure? What happens? I don't know. I don't know. I'm enjoying the ride while I'm on it and trying to hopefully start some conversations about, you know, this Faustian bargain that Stanford has made with Silicon Valley.

I love it. It's truly a remarkable book. I highly recommend it. How to Rule the World is available now. Theo Baker. We're going to take a quick break. On Disney Plus, the Hulu original series Furious follows FBI agent Alice Black, played by Emmy Rossum, on the hunt for a mysterious and calculating serial killer.

Both walk their own paths toward justice. And as their lives start to intertwine, the line between right and wrong begins to blur. New episodes week over week. Watch the Hulu original series Furious, now streaming only on Hulu on Disney Plus. Hear that? It's your money calling.

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I think it was notes for a great big book that he planned to make maybe $10 or $15 million off of. We can go through it. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching The Daily Show, wherever you get your podcasts. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.