The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Hasan Minhaj Covers Prince Andrew Being Forced Out Of His Mansion | Kevin O’Leary

Episode Date: March 3, 2023

Hasan Minhaj tackles today's headlines, including Prince Charles forcing Prince Andrew out of his mansion, and chats with Roy Wood Jr. about the Tooth Fairy's rates reaching a new all-time high. “Shark Tank” investor and venture capitalist Kevin O’Leary discusses his losses and lessons learned from the failed crypto exchange FTX.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Ditch the other hiring sites and let zip recruiter find what you're looking for, the needle in the haystack. Four out of five employers who post on Zip Recruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at this exclusive web address. Zip Recruiter.com. Slash. Zip Recruiter. The smartest way to hire. Do nice guys really finish last. I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti will examine villains undone by their villainy, monstrous self-devaring

egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the I-Heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You're listening to Comedy Central. This is the Daily Show with your host, Hassin Minha. Thank you. Wow, welcome to the Daily Show, I'm Asin Min-Ha'a' And it's my last night as guest host. It's over. Wow, welcome to the Daily Show, I'm Asin' Min-hi! And it's my last night as guest host.

It's over. Settle in, settle in. Look, it's my last night as guest host. It's over. I stripped the bed and I left the sheets on top of the washer and dryer. Now, give me back my deposit, Comedy Central. But first, we got a show to do. So let's get into headlines.

Now, as I've said, this is my last night here. But as an Indian and as an American, I can't leave without shitting on the United Kingdom. So let's talk about the latest drama in the royal family. Because apparently, Prince Andrew is pissed at his brother, King Charles, is trying to move him out of his 30-room mansion and into the tiny, 10-room Frogmore Cottage. First of all, I get why he's upset that, because that's barely enough space for a teenage sex dungeon. But second, why are you complaining your house has a name?

Any house with the name is next level. My house just has a number like a peasant. Moving on. According to a new survey, the average tooth fairy payout has now hit a record $6.23 per tooth, which is insane. Poor Nick Cannon's gonna be broke by the end of this. Now look, okay, as a parent, I wanna know how other dads feel about this, which is why.

I turn to fellow dad Roywood Jr. I know your son. How are you? I am dad, you are dad. Whoa. Look, this is important. I know, thank you. I know your son is getting to tooth losing age. Yeah, they're getting jiggly. Yeah.

Is he getting that sweet six bucks from the tooth fairy? Hell no. I did the responsible thing but my boy and I told him that the tooth fairy is dead. Wait, what? You told him the tooth fairy is dead? She's dead. She's dead. She's gone. She tripped over my son's toys he'd be laying, laying over the house. She stepped on the toy, broke her neck their neck their neck their neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck her neck, and choked her to choke to death on her own tongue. Why would you say that to your own kid?

Well, he's gotta put his damn toys up now. I bet you will now. Look, it isn't like, I'm tired of him not cleaning up. And I'm tired of buying into this system, man. wea teeth. And what are they learning from that? What are they learning? All your kids learn is that they can sell their body parts for money. No wonder, I spent my whole 20 selling plasma, selling blood, selling sperm, selling bone marrow, dropped off a kidney. All the tooth fairy did was teach me how to treat my body like a garage sale.

Wait, wait. But losing a tooth is a big moment. He should get something. He is getting something. He's getting a new tooth. That's the prize. You get to keep chewing. And let's just be real high, so where does it end? Lose a tooth, six dollars.

Oh, you got your first zip. Here's the tip' this little botherfix for growing hair on his back. No. He gets one present a year. His birthday, that's it. Okay, what about Christmas, right? Wait, what? Christmas? Well, Santa Dad too. I told my sign that Santa Claus died from too much screen time on the iPad. Okay, wait. Listen, man. thi. th th th th th th. th thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. thea. thea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. thea. thea. thea. Hea. He iPad. Okay, wait, listen, man, for your son's sake, man, just... Here, just... Give this to Henry Tells from Uncle Husson, okay? Wow. He lost two teeth, you...

All right. Roywood Jr., everybody, he just... I know you got it on. All right, when we get back, we're going to talk about the golden age of drifting, so don't go away. I don't know if a... Oh, God. That, that's a story.

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in the haystack. Four out of five employers who post on Zip Recruiter get a quality to to to to the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the the thputor, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the ruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at this exclusive web address, ziprecruter.com. SIP Recruiter.com slash zip. Zip Recruiter. The smartest way to hire. It's been said that nice guys finish last. But is that really true? I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy, and monstrous self-devaring

egos, and we'll delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper, and dare to confront a formidable empire. The Art of Fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the IHart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to the Daily Show. You know, over the past couple of years, I've been noticing something. Do you guys feel like scam artists are everywhere? Right? You obviously heard about FTX, right?

The Cryptocurrency exchange that lost 88 billion of investor deposits based on the reputation of this electrocuted nine-year-old? Yeah. It was insane. But you know what was crazier? The people who helped him do it. I'm excited to be partnering with FTX to help make crypto accessible for everyone. I'm all in, are you?

With FTX, I have everything I need to buy, sell and trade and trade and trade and trade and trade and trade and trade and trade and trade crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto crypto cryptoto everyone. I'm all in, are you? With FTX, I have everything I need to buy, sell, and trade crypto safely. I'm trading crypto. FTX is the safest and easiest way to buy and sell crypto. It's the best way to get in the game. If there's ever a place I could be that I'm not going to get in trouble, it's going to be at FTX. Well, that prediction aged so poorly, Leonardo DiCaprio just broke up with it. So obviously FTX is old news, but when the new CEO John Ray took over the company, he looked at the books and he said one thing that I cannot forget.

He said that he has never seen a group of such inexperienced, unsophisticated and potentially compromised group of individuals. This dude said that the situation was, quote, unprecedented, and he oversaw the bankruptcy of Enron. Okay? That's like if your doctor told you he had the weirdest penis he had ever seen. And then you found out his other patient was Rudy Giuliani. Now a lot of people have said we are living in the golden age of grifting. There's articles

everywhere about it but it's not the golden age of grifting because that makes it sound smart and sophisticated. The truth is, the grifters of our age are fucking morons. Just absolute dipshits. Soft brain meanderthals. And that's the part that bothers me so much. I have friends that I grew up with that got duped by these clout-chasing sociopaths. That's why we need to know why it's gotten so stupid, so we never get back here.

Let's talk about the golden age of dip shittery in our latest installment of Long Story Short. Do you guys remember the 08 financial crisis? Yes, it was so complicated. Remember the big short? What the hell is a credit default swap? I have no idea. Margot Robbie explained it to me naked in a bathtub, and I still don't get it. But the scandals today? Oh, they're truly idiotic. Take Coinbase, okay? Very legit app.

I have it on my phone. But it was recently at the center of the first crypto insider trading scandal. Now, you're probably thinking, wow, husk and crypto. It's got to be complicated, right? Wrong. According to the DOJ, here's how it worked. Right before CoinBase listed a new coin, this dork, who worked at Coinbase, would text his little brother to tell him to buy that coin.

And at one point, they just texted the dollar sign and eyes emoji. You know, the universal symbol for insider trading. Just zero subtlety. Now it gets even dumber. When Coinbase caught him and tried to bring him in, Eishan emailed his co-workers that he would be, quote, out indefinitely because he had to fly back to India overnight. Eishon, you fucking dumbass.

You're fleeing the country. You don't ping HR on slack. Just hey Carol, running from the law, just looping you in. Just bumping this for visibility. Thanks. Now obviously. Crypto is full of idiots, but this dip-. Thanks. Neat. Now obviously, crypto is full of idiots. But this dip shit grifting, oh, it's fucking everywhere. So don't feel bad if you've been duped.

Even JPMorgan got swindled. Take the case of Charlie Javis, okay? She found a startup called Frank, and she claimed to have a user base of almost 4 million customers. And in 2021, JPMorgan bought her company for $175 million. She was in Forbes. She was the future. But now, JPMorgan is suing her because it looks like those 4 million customers she had?

Oh, she made them up. Almost all of them were fake. Do you know how JPMorgan found out they were fake? After they bought the company, which is fucking stupid, they emailed the list and then 70% of the emails bounced back. That's right. The person who blew the lid off this intricate plot was Mailer Demon. What the fuck is going on? I think there are three factors, okay?

Number one, millennials have three times less money than boomers did at the same age. So we have this feeling as millennials where we want to catch up, pay for that marriage, that mortgage. We feel behind the game. We got to catch up fast. Now, Gen X, they're behind two, but who gives a shit about them? They have Nirvana.

Number two, 0% interest rates, a huge amount of money into the system. And the third reason there's more griffs than ever might be the most important detail. Social media. From the moment you wake up and you pull out your phone, these grifters have root access to your brain. And it's never been easier for total idiots to pass themselves off as stock market gurus to millions of people. And there is no idiot more total idiots to pass themselves off as stock market gurus to millions of people and there is no idiot more total than this guy. My name is Tommy. I am from Tel Aviv Israel. Now I live in Beverly Hills, California.

Last year I turned $3,000 into $4 million. We used to be broke. I am a stock trader. F. M. E. I. P. Holy s Shit. to. And I am the the th. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. the. the. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I........................................................................................ broke! I am a stock trader. M.E.I.P. Holy shit. And I am also the number 61 DJ on the planet. This is Tommy Cooperman. AKA the number one 61 DJ on the planet. But he's hoping to drop down to 69 so he can go by DJ, Noise. Tommy and his friends promoted themselves on Twitter as

financial gurus, follow them and you could be a baller. And they amassed huge follings because they look really cool, right? Especially the guy doing this. And... Fee' yeah, dude. Fee' yeah, dude. But I want to talk about this guy with a Photoshop head of Zach Morris. Now, in reality, that's Edward Constantine. Edward loves to go on Twitter and show off his cars, his shoes, and his scooters.

That's right, ladies. Scooters. Edward loves scooters. He rides them all the time while being really cool. And do I blame them? No, because I am pretty fucking cool. I'm making $100,000. I don't know what the fucking tho your life. Evaluated and chase your things around. Maybe get rid of your wife, your kids, or whatever's holding you back. So, yeah guys, just, you can do it too. Just get a bike, start making $100,000 a day. I can honestly say I have never prayed harder for a car door to open.

Okay. The question was, how are these guys getting so rich from trading stocks? Okay. The question was, How were these guys getting so rich from trading stocks? And the suspicion was they were running a pump and dump scam. That's when you buy a stock, you hype it up to your followers, so they buy it, which pushes the price up, then you secretly sell your stock.

And then innocent people get left holding the bag. And you would think they would hide the evidence, right? Nope. Eddie would regularly post pictures like this. Or he would regularly tweet that he loved pumping and dumping and then posted a photo of him and his friend flipping off the SEC. Fuck yeah, bro. And it went on like that until the SEC said, um, no, F-c. You. I knew this morning an alleged $114 million fraud scheme

involving self-proclaimed stock market influencers. The SEC and DOJ are charging eight social media influencers in the so-called pump and dump plant. Prosecutors have a secretly recorded voice chat where the influencers even brag about the alleged scheme, saying, quote, we're robbing fucking idiots of their money. Oh my God, these mouth-breathing morons snitched on themselves. Oh, fuck no, bro. Now, I gotta give props to the SEC. They're clearly starting to send a signal to all grifters that it's 2023 and the party's over.

Last year, the SEC collected a record 6.4 billion in penalties with no sign of slowing down. Now, who knows if these guys are going to go to jail, but the SEC is making an example out of them and it's working. After the SEC charged them, all of them stopped tweeting or deleted their accounts. All those scooter-dush Edward Constantine left us with one epic final tweet. I love my homies on here. The rest of you can keep swinging on my nose.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. I have to admit that is kind of money. You know, it's funny. It's funny.

Okay, okay. It's funny. But one of the top responses to that tweet is not funny. And it reminds me of the people that I know that also got duped. One of the top responses, this dude writes, shame on me. I used to defend these guys, thinking that they were going to help me pay off my wife's medical bills after her fighting breast cancer. I know I'm the one that clicked the buy button, but damn I lost a tonnenene to to to to to to tod money money money money money money money money money money money tod the one that clicked the buy button but damn I lost a ton of money following their trades. This is the true damage of the grift. This is

why there needs to be consequences and the good news is there can be. If you think someone is running a scam on Twitter or Tick Tock be a snitch. Yes Hassan Minhaj is saying, snitch, I am pro-snitching. The SEC has a website to submit tips anonymously. You can go to this website and snitch on dip shit grifters. So long story short, start calling these motherfuckers out. Drop kick them with cold, hard consequences. Because if you're not, in the words of the great scooter philosopher, I don't know

what the fuck you're doing with your life. When we come back, I'll talk to one of those people who is plugging FTS. You don't want to miss it. Finding great candidates to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. You might get a lot of resumes, but not enough candidates with the right skills or experience. But not with Zip Recruiter. Zip Recruiter finds amazing candidates for you fast. And right now you can try it for free at Zip Recruiter.com. Zip Recruiters smart technology identifies top talent for your roles quickly. Immediately after you post your job, Zip Recruiters powerful matching technology starts showing you qualified

people for it. And you can use Zip Recruiters pre-written invite to apply message to personally reach out to your favorite candidates and encourage them to apply sooner. Ditch the other hiring sites and let Zip Recruiter find what you're looking for, the needle in the haystack. Four out of five employers who post on Zip Recruiter within the first day. Try it for free at this exclusive web address.zip recruiter.com slash zip. Zip. Again that's zip recruiter.com slash zip. Zip recruiter, the smartest way to hire. It's been said that nice guys finish last. But is that really true? I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question.

Join me for my new miniseries on the art of fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring egos, and we'll delve into the extraordinary villainy, and monstrous self-devaring egos, and will delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper, and dare to confront a formidable empire. The art of fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. My guest tonight is a Shark Take Investor and a Venture Capitalist.

Please welcome Kevin O'Leary. There you go. Nice to see you. Kevin O'Leary, ladies and gentlemen. They know you? Nice to see you. You too. What's happening? Well, I'm just... They know you? Nice to see you. You too.

What's happening? Well, I'm just, I'm just grifting through town. You're not good. Man, thank you for coming on the show. I want to say this first and foremost. I always give people their flowers. So I want to say, me and my dad, love you on Shark Tank. Appreciate her. Yes. Shark Tank is one of those shows.

A family can sit down, we can watch it together. We can cosplay as entrepreneurs and vicariously live through a fun piece of unscripted semi-reality content. So thank you for giving us that. And it's 14 seasons, right? 14. Okay. But the truth is we don't script anything because we see them the same time you do. We had no idea it would just blow up this way. I mean it's a remarkable platform. Yes. And it supports American entrepreneurship. What's wrong with that? It's amazing. Now, you have been making your rounds.

We were speaking backstage. Just to give everyone context, obviously we're talking about cryptoFTX. You've been making the rounds testifying before Congress, going on squawk box 78 times. And everybody's asking you about, you know, your endorsement of FTX, the $15 million bag. But nobody's asking you, how you doing? How are you feeling? How are you feeling?

Well, let's just get the numbers right. It was 18 million dollars. 18 million dollars. 18. And it's all gone, that's it. And invention- But can you take me through the relationship timeline of you and electrocuted little box?

How long did you got? We can run it. I told you, I was like, let's do it. So, because, just for context, at first, you've been on Squakbox, you've been on programs, and you're like, Bitcoin is this is think is think is like, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th....... th....... But, th... But, th. But, th.. But, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, toa. tooan, tooan, tooan, tooan, canaaa. tooan, canaa. tooananananananan awful I'm paraphrasing yeah I think I did say that because at that time the regulator was very very negative yes and then countries like Canada Switzerland United and France England Australia they opened up yeah they opened up yeah they opened up to the investor that I like me I invested internationally I started to allocate to it right and then you start thinking you go look you know SPF fc, the the the the to the the to to the to the to the to the the to the the the the to the to the the the th. th. the th. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to open up internationally. It's just becoming more regulated in Switzerland and other countries.

And so, you know, clearly this guy who's running this Bahamian orgy is running a responsible operation. So, how did he get in your DMs? How did he penetrate that heart? So obviously at a time in 2021 when FTTX was out financing doing rounds at a 23 billion valuation, that was the hottest deal on the street. If you look at the people that invest in that it's the Who's Who a Venture Company? Dude I was pissed that I wasn't asked. When I look at that role and it's like

Shaquille O'Neal, like Steph Curry, Tom Brady. That's how you know I haven't made it. Well those are that. That's, th. That's, the the the the the the the they. That's, they. That's, they, they, they, they, they, they, th. That's, they, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. That was th. That was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. That's, th. That's th. That's th. That's thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. t. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. today was today was the let me in, baby, let me get that call. R-E-M-Smy agent called me. Maybe you're lucky you didn't get that call. Okay. Think that way. Okay. So at the end of the day, when you invest in any startup, and this includes FTX and's alleged fraud, sometimes bad execution,

sometimes bad market, sometimes bad product, but for ever reason, eight out of ten times you lose money. So the people that invest in FTX, people are asking me, well isn't this going to change investing forever? No, nothing's going to change. Sure. Because we know we're gunning for that two times where we make a tha tha our money. The next morning after I lost that $18 million, yes I was pissed, okay? But it didn't change anything about what I do as an investor. I get right up and I go at it again because I have, if every time I had a loser investment

I had to go to Congress, I'd need an apartment there. Right. I get a monster hit and it pays for all the mistakes. FTX is in the past for me, too bad. I feel sick about it. We all look like idiots. But we got to fund the next venture.

But how did he penetrate? You didn't answer the question. So the way this works this this did he get... So the way this works. Like, I got the five talking points, but how did he just... How did he slide in the DMs? How did he slide in the DMs? I know you're recording this. It's all good. How did he slide in the DMs of your heart?

Come on! Because I've gotten the call. I've got two places on th. th. th. th. th. the places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places places. I the the the the the the to. I was. I was. I was to. I was to. I was, I was, I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I got. I'm. I got. I. I. I got. I got. I. I know. I got. I'm. I know. I know. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I So the way to see it. Because I've gotten the call. I've gotten the call. Two places on this. I was a paid spokesperson, yes. But I was also an investor. I took millions of dollars and invested them in FTX, international and US. So I'm getting squeezed in both sides on this point. At the end of the day, the way I look, I look, the the way, the way, the way I look at it is okay I have an agent he gets contacted and says look do you want to be a paid spokesperson to this I said I'm interested in

crypto what do we know about this company yeah we know that it's got the biggest investor list I've ever seen yeah but then you reply to like Kevin O'Leary all agents at CAA dot com and you go I've said that this is dog shit reply and then then they go they go they go they go Kevin they go Kevin they go Kevin they go Kevin they go Kevin they go Kevin they go Kevin the they go Kevin the th the th th th th th th th the the the tho the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho the tho tho the the the the tho tho tho tho tho the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho tho tho tho tho the the the the the the the they they they they. they. they. the the they. the they. tho tho tho the thi thi is dog shit reply and then you send. No I didn't say that. And then they go, Kevin, comma, enter. It's a, it's a big bag. The way this works is you go and back and say, okay, 1.8 billion raised, who's in the raise? Who did the due diligence? Plenty of them did?

And it's the private equity business. And I said, okay, somebody dillied this thing, yeah. And the parents were compliance lawyers out of Stanford. I mean, that's pretty good. Yeah. So at the end of the day, it's a very unfortunate outcome. And everybody looks too. Because you do your due diligence. I've seen you.

You are a savage. Obviously, S. SBF and FTX, your boy, has lost $8 billion of investor funds. And clearly, from the reports, no one did their due diligence. So I'm asking you on behalf of the Daily Show, will you fly to Palo Alto, where he's on house arrest, and spray this shit down, and hit him with the cattle prom? Enough of the, 40 appearances, enough of the four minute segments on Squaqbox. Let's take a Southwest flight tonight. Lay over in Chicago, it's on me.

We land SFO, my dad will pick us up and we will go to... I think that's a little extreme. Just a little. I mean, look, at the end of the day, think about this. At the end of the day, a lot of people lost money. Retail got fleece. That's what happened at the end of the day. Okay, did Lehman Brothers change anything?

No, Enron. No. Bear Stearns. No. There's a to be the bad actors. This is capitalism and every once in a while there's a bad actor. You just went through a whole litany of them and the system self-corrects. If you do bad things, shit happens to you, bad shit, and I think that's okay. That's our system. The whole idea is you can make money without being

a fraudster. This is a great country. You can be an entrepreneur. You can start a company with a great product and become a multi-millionaire. That's the path that people take 99% of the time. And we should celebrate that. This comes along. Alleged fraud like this, it's going to go through the system. Hopefully, we're going to get a huge recovery for everybody that lost their money.

Already, the rumors are where it's six out of eight billion. They found that, 6.1 billion. Who knows what else will be coming? I want to help everybody on this situation. But I've moved on and so is everybody else. I have a lot of urban professional elites with LinkedIn accounts here in the crowd tonight. In corporate America, they have a thing called C.Y.A.C.C.C.C.

And I think, Mr. O'Leary, you're making the 70 appearances right now and testifying before Congress to let people know, hey, hey, hey, HR, something f-feepped up happened. Someone burned down the house while mom and dad left. But you kind of were a part of the arson to begin with. Well, let me correct you on that for a moment, okay? Okay. During the period when everybody was trying to get allocation to FTX, particularly FTX US. Hottest deal in the twenty, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, tm. te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, something, something something, something something something, something something, something, something, thi and thi and the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, the thi, thi, thi, thi, t, t, t, t, tom, tom, tom, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te, te.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea, te.e.e.e.s, something something something something something something something something, te, te when everybody was trying to get allocation to FTX, particularly FTX US, hottest deal on the street in 2021, I got countless calls for people saying, let me in on your allocation, you owe me, we've done business together, I said, guys, it's a startup.

It's a big one, it's a $23 billion startup, but it's a startup. If I'm going to take this ride, I'll do it with my own dough. I'm not going to put anybody else's money into it. Nobody lost money on that deal in terms of investing on it except me. So I don't I don't have the problem where I owe somebody, you know an apology for investing beside me. I owe everybody and all of us involved own an apology for not knowing it was an alleged fraud, but you know this happens from time to time, but in my mind I can go to sleep every night knowing that it was my money, I lost it, I ate it, shame on me, but doesn't change what I do in the morning. I'm a very fortunate guy. I can take huge hits and I move on and I keep going. That is the essence of entrepreneurship. You're gonna get kicked to the ground once in a while. thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho tho tho th. tho tho tho tho-it tho-it tho tho tho tho-it tho-a tho-a tho-a tho-a tho-a tho-I thi thi tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th th th th th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the to the to to to to to-nn' to-n'-n'ee to-n'ee to-n'e to to to the the the the entrepreneurship. You're going to get kicked to the ground once in a while. And this was a big kick in the where it hurts. Right. As somebody said to me, the one I remember the most, you know, the economist on CNBC said

to me, we came out of the green room after I had one of those countless presentations on there about it. And he, Kevin, $18 million. That's a lot of guitars. And he's right. Yeah, you love guitars. He loves guitars. He's telling a story that's not great because you have to set up the premise for the punchline.

This is my comedy, Shark Tane. Okay, listen. Here's what has to happen. You have to be able to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to expose to be a a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to beauice. to beaqqqqqqqqq. the the to beaq. toa. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toe. toeateateateateateateateateateateateateathea.eathea.eathea.eathea.eathea.eathea.eathea.e have to be able to expose your position. When you say you lost money, the only way for us to truly know is if a forensic accountant comes in. I want that. So you want the full transparency. Everybody, you don't understand.

Everybody had the right. So you got the 18 mil. Look, me and you were in Hollywood, not these regular Normies. So let's let's have the big boy talk. I want to have the talk. So out of the 18 mil. Well, wait, hang on, let me, let me get them in on it. So out of the 18 mil, you guys don't know this. There's agents, managers, business managers. And the IRS.

All of them, FICA. FICA. . Out of that 18 mil, my man probably saw, let's go six to seven. Now that's just straight cash, but we don't know. Some of it could be USD, some of it could be some of that sweet, sweet equity position. But we won't know until a forensic accountant comes in. We want that. I have a hunch.

Yeah. I think you didn't lose a whole lot of the shirt off your back, but retail did. All of my money on the comp, just so you understand this, by the contract was in an FTX account. So 18 comes in, as you correct, about half of it pays taxes and agents and the unions and all that stuff. The rest goes into the account, and on Saturday morning, Novemberth, it was scraped out along with all the trading records. Everybody there, including me, does not know where that money is or do they have the trading records. Do I want to hire a forensic accountant? Absolutely. I've disclosed I had 32 positions. It wasn't cash. It was crypto. It was crypto. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thii. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thoed. thoea. thia. thoea. thoea. thoea. thoea. thoea. thoea. thoea. thoed. thoed. thoed. thoed. thiia. thia. thoed. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoed. tho. tho. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta all kinds of coins and tokens. And so they're all gone and I would like to find out where they are. So would another million people. But it was also house money. That's the key difference. How do you say that?

How do you say that? How do you say that? you're playing off of cake? What's coming to you? Hey, we're giving you a big head start. The million cash. The that's million cash. that's million. that's million. that's million. that's million. that's million. that's million. that's million. that's is is is. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. the million. the million. the million. the million. the million. the million. the million. the million. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. th. So. So. So. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. So. So you that. Thank you. Okay, so you've lost one million U.S.D. personal? Yes. Okay. Actually more. It was, I think, 1.25 million. Okay. So the only way we can truly. But you're making that heuristic, but you're making that heuristic based off of that 6.6 to 7 million coming in. Look, we're going to do math all day. I get paid. I get pay pay pay pay pay pay pay. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the only. I the only. I get paid. I get paid. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I get more. I get more. I get more. I get. I get. I get more. I the only. I get more. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I. I. I. I. I the only. I. I. I. I the only. I. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I the only. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th to the conclusion of this is if we do the old rule when you're sexting a partner, I'll show you yours if you show me. That's the only way. Let's not, we don't need to dance around it. It's fine, it's fine. It's fine. My whole deal is I've been totally transparent with it. The reason I've go the reason I've gone on and talked to to to to to to to to th about th about th. th. to th. th. the to to to to to to the the to to to thoes thoes thoes the the thoes thoes thoes tho their tho thr-I thrown. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their toes. toes. toes. toes. toes. toes. toeoesuoesuoesuoesuoesuoesuoesuoesuoesuoeskkk. teoesuoesuoesk. their their their their their all learn a lesson from this and I'm teaching this case at Harvard actually. I think there's a lot to learn from it because it's a great example of when you do portfolio work, when you put big money to work, you've got to know you're never safe. You just don't know what's going to happen. And this case is crazy. We haven't even seen the end of this yet. The records are supposedly backed up on their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thin, thi. thin, thin, tho, tho, tho, thin, thin, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. throoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. no one's seen them yet. I don't know where that money went. I'd like to find out.

And that's the same question every institution has. I'm one of the only institutions walking around talking about it. But so what? It's a horrible outcome. It's a bad investment. I've made bad ones in the past. I'm going to make bad ones in the future the way it works. I hear you and I think there's a detail that you need to add to your Harvard class which is and all the other places that

you go. Maybe I should bring you with me. Sure. I'll pull up. I mean if Kim Kardashian can pull up I'll pull up. Now listen, Kevin let me just finish. I will I will sincerely pull up. Okay here's the thing. When you go on the Daily Show right now, or when you go on our friend Aaron Ross Orkin's show, right, when you say 80% of these companies fail, that is correct. Let's say it's even more. Let's say it's 90%. It's 80. The stats have been around since 19. But what you're not accounting for is, you're speaking to the upper, to, to, the upper, to, the, to, the, to, to, the, to, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to, to, to, to, to, th, th, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th., th., th., thi, thi, thi, the their, thi, thi, their, thin, thi, to to to to to to to to to tooo, to to to to to to to their, their, thi, thi, th to the upper 1% that can lose that money.

Everybody else that's listening should probably just put their money in ETF, set it aside, yeah go to sleep, wake up 30 years later. But, but, but you're not disclosing that. Once again, your position, how much you've been personally paid up front to... I did. I told exactly. No, no, not, not about FTX, just in general. With the the the the the the the the the m-thea, should, should, should, should, the m, should, should, the m, should, should, should, the m, should, should, should, the m, should, should, should your position, how much you've been personally paid up front. I did, I told exactly what it was. No, no, not about FTX, just in general, with the myriad of companies that you're pulling. Oh, I see. Do you see what I'm saying? Guess what I'm saying?

Guess what I'm trying to do? I'm not, I'm shamed of it. I'm ashamedtrying to make. When you invest, you take risks. And that's why you need diversity. You need a lot of stocks. ETF's a good idea, it has a lot of stocks, whatever. At the end of the day, though. But it's not a whatever. That position, doing that, putting your money in an SPY, S&P 500 for 30 years, is going to benefit 95% of the population. And the key theyp. th, th. And th. And th. th. th. It's th. It's thip, thip, thi, thi O'Leary, Mark Cuban, because they see you very differently than say Larry David. But we take different...

Or Shaquille O'Neal or all the other people that were in the FTX commercial. Mr. Wonderful says this is a good position. In reality, every time you go on Squaqbox or of the world. I don't promote crypto positions. I talk about platforms and diversity. I didn't do commercials and I never would because I don't advocate single products. You don't do commercials. I mean, you're on every third commercial during the commercial breaks of Shark Tank. You know, I'm talking, you're talking about FTX, right? You're talking about FTX. I'm not. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. Yeah, I understand. Okay. Yeah. Do you see what I'm saying? Yes. I guess my yes. If you go to your YouTube channel just on your YouTube channel, the fourth or fifth video on your YouTube channel is, is this the bottom of the market? Do you know what that's signaling to retail investors? It's signaling them to either pop in or pop out. When in reality, you should just go, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, real talk. talk. talk. talk. talk. talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, the tick, the the the the the the the tok. the the ta. the the the the the the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. theat. theateateateatean. thean. tean. thean. thean. th thean. th thean. thean. th thean, hey, hey, real talk. You should have one class at Harvard.

It should be 10 minutes. Listen to me right now. Listen to me. Put your money in a Vanguard portfolio, VTSAX or S&P 500. Maybe do a bond position right now because it's giving you 4 percent. Set it aside and turn off Squackbox. Actually, don't even listen to what I have to say. You're being tough on Squaqbox.

They do a service. People are interested. Listen, I understand indexing. That's great. I do that too. But if you want to extermissing, that's trying to tell me, should be just, if you had a chance to invest in Google, where this valuation was $5 million, do you wish you did that? Sure. Yes.

Behindside is 2020 always, and you will lose that way. Why would you lose that way? You can lose 95% of the time that way, trying to pick stocks. Kevin, you know this. Even the great Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger, the goats of capitalism, even they say, now, these geriatric coffin dodgers, now, at their shareholders' meeting go, listen to me, listen to me, if I could do it all over again, I would just put it in an index one and tug it away. And we'll play the clip, Kevin, it's on YouTube.

Listen, let's not do this. Can I ask you just a question? We can do back and forth. I just want to ask you this, because I mean this sincerely. I've been trying to crack this. Are you a great investor, or are you a great spokesperson? Because I think you're the latter. OK, I don't agree try agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree agree to agree to to to to to the to to to to to think you're the latter. Okay, I don't agree with you. Let me tell you what's happened over the last 10 years. The ability to tell a company's story, to get people to understand what their mission

is and the benefit of their product is highly valuable. Very. Because there's a million stories out there and the biggest problem every company has, including giant S&P companies, companies, is how do they th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th they they th they th they th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the. I thate. theateate. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm thea. I'm tea. I'm tea. I'm tea. I'm tell. I'm tell. I'm tell tell tell tell the giant S&P countries, companies, is how do they get customer acquisition? How do they acquire customers? Eight out of ten companies fail in America after 36 months because they're never able to get their customer acquisition costs below the lifetime value. That's where I change the equation. If I invest in your company, I tell your story. That's what my job is to do. Yes, I take risk risk to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. thii, their. thi, their. their. thia. their. their. their. their. thauoomoomoomorrow. I, their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm, their. I'm, their. I'm theirse. I'm theirse. I'm theirse. I'm te. I'm te. I'm te. I'm teck. I'm tefficientefficientefficientefficientefficienteckefficientefficientefficienteckefficienteck. I'm tefficientefficienteck. I'm teck. I'm te. I'm te. I'm te your story. That's what my job is to do. Yes, I take risk. I'm fortunate to have money to invest, but I get behind it and tell the story. And that's what we do on Shark Tank.

Why are Shark Tank companies so successful? Why do so many more of them make money than the traditional eight out of ten? Because we tell the magic sauce. So I think I'm a great investor by being able to be a great storyteller too. People need to know what the product does, what the merits of it are. That's why they try it. That's why it's important to tell these stories. You talk to any shark. Do you feel guilty? I hear what you're saying, I hear what you're saying. So tell me, you know'm telling you is right or wrong. What I hear you're saying is

No, Hasan, I disagree with you. I think I am a great investor and a great spokesperson That you do both that if I see Something a seat of a good idea in your company. I'm great at communication. I'm good at the micro content. I can communicate those things. Okay? So? Then then you then you then you then you then you then you then then then then then then then then then then then then then then then then you then you then you then you th me th me th me th me th, th me th, th me th me the the the the they. their they. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. their. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I to to to to their their their. I their. I their those things. Okay, so then you have, I would imagine you would feel some level of guilt when some of the companies that you are promoting end up leaving retail investors holding the bag where you're like, damn, I promoted this. Because... Here's why. You know with certainty in venture investing, investing in startups, since the beginning of time, eight out of ten are going to fail. I know that, you know that, and the whole world knows that because those are the stats. There's nothing you can do to change that.

But the system of you going on these shows, Squawkbox is financial FOMO, the graphs, the ticker, but you're on. guys are swinging kettle bells in Greenwich, do I gotta get in now or later. You know this! Bap, blah, blah, breaking new these, now, door dash, IPO. Do I get in now? Again, it's that FOMO, I gotta get in now. I think what you're philosophically, that's all. What you're missing in the messaging is, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they.. th. th. th. thin, th. th. th. th. th. they. the, the, the, the, the, the promote the idea of investing you should also promote the idea of diversity diversification. You can't put it all in any one position or any one institution because you don't know when

there's going to be an ex-Lea brother or Bear Stearns or when a stock goes to zero. By the way big companies go to zero they do. Yeah and so that happens so if you have diversification and I learned this from my mother, never more than 20% in any one sector, we have 11 sectors in the American economy, never more than 5% of any one stock. That is the definition of diversity, and that's what I do with my own portfolio. That's how you stay out of trouble. Okay. You obviously...

You would agree with that. Sure. Yeah, wait a second, but when you are going on a six-minute segment, if you did this, if you pulled up on your next Squackbox segment and said that, amazing. I do say that. But you don't, you're, you give hot mics. You're not watching the right segment. I've seen you 40 of them. I mean, you're putting up shots, my man, and some of them are just airballs. Now listen, if you are thua thua thua thua thua thua thuuuuuu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thi thi thi thi thi. thi. that's that, you that, you that, you that, you th. that's that. that, you're that. that. that. tho that, you're th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you, you to. Yeah, you to. Yeah, you to. Yeah, you to. Yeah, you're to. Yeah, you're to. Yeah, you're to. to to to to to to to to to to to toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. th. th. th. th. just airballs. Now listen, if you are a great investor, let me ask you this, and a great spokesman.

I'm a crowd of my track record. Why are you on cameo? I love came. Are great investors on cameo? I love the graphic. I love the graphic. I love the graphic. You can book a personalized video for $1,500.

You know why? For $1,500, you can book a business video. I don't even know what that is. For $6,500. Do you understand why? Because this helps entrepreneurs launch their products and services. 99% of my cameos is a business that can't afford to go to an agent and pay half a million dollars. This is fantastic. What they've done, my biggest mistake on cameo was not to take down 20% of the stock when it was offered to me. I should have bought 20%. I mean, it was really a fantastic idea.

Sorry, I'm an advocate and I'm going to keep doing it. And people book them because it helps them. I'll do anything to help an entrepreneur. That's who I am. Let me ask this a few sub-question. the same question. No, no, no. Sub questions, sub questions. First of all, cameo's absolute dog shit. It's a way for Rachel Dolizald to wish you happy birthday. I'm not joking.

Number two, do you think big boy investors do cameos? Do you think Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger tap dance for $6,500? Nassim Taleb is out here doing a business video. They are not venture investors. They don't start up entrepreneurs. They don't do any of that. Do you need any of it? Listen, I spend plenty of dollars doing what I do and I give to all kinds of philanthropic

everybody. I do that work because people tell actual qualitative, the quality of that work. I do that work because people tell me, and they have for years doing it, this has really helped me. I'm happy to do it. Read the comments. I mean, if you want to be a critic go ahead, but read the comments. I mean, that's the real task. The comment of a person asking The comments. The comment of a the comment is the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the the comment of a the the the the comment of a the the the the the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a th. 15 15 15 $ $ $1500. 15 $1500. 15 $1500. 15 $15, the comment is the comment, the comment, the comment, the comment is the comment is the comment is the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a the comment of a th. 15, $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $15, $15, $15, $15, $15, $15,000.50,000.50,000.50,000.50, $1,000.50, $1,000.50, $1,000.50, $1.50, $1 comment of a th.50,000.50,000.50,000.50,000.50, $1 comment is $1 comment is $1,500, $6,500. People that actually use them. Okay, sure. I don't do many $1,500 ones. They're all the $6,500 ones? Unfortunately, I'm a little... Because if you're a business and you want to use it,

you got to pay the rights. I feel very sorry for those people. Well, I'm sorry, you know, I'm going to charge you $12,000. I'm not gonna do that I I get it It's it's hard to rattle me on things I know that work, you know I mean you didn't I mean the cameo thing is really bad man. It's a truly bad look. I don't agree. I don't agree. It's it's for grifters sociopath sick offense and OJ Simpson. I mean like there's the people that are on came you say you're a little negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative negative th??? th? th? th? th? th? th? I th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I get thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi mean like there's the people that are on cameo. It is... You're a little negative on cameo. Okay. Do you guys like came? No, don't boo? Don't boo. I mean I was just asking. Okay. Listen, this has been a very interesting conversation. Yeah, let's do the small business. So we spoke back stage. He wants to plug the small business thing, but can I just say this one thing and we'll plug the small business

thing. We're going to do this whole, this is all going to be online, so it's all good. So I think, the reason why I'm very passionate about this is because I think there is ecosystem of a lot of VC people and people with money going on these shows, giving advice to retail. And look, I think entertainment is important. But when Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith give their hot takes, it doesn't potentially affect people's 401ks or their bank account. When you give financial tips, it's like a doctor giving a doctor giving a tip, it's like a doctor giving a tip, their their their ta, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, their, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, their, giving, their their, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tipe, their their their their to, to, tipe, tipe, to, tipe, ta, ta, ta, ta, to, to.ks or their bank account. When you give financial tips, it's like a doctor giving a diagnosis to a patient they can't even see. You don't know the number of people that you're inadvertently or inadvertently hurting. Let me tell you

why I disagree with you. Go ahead. Do you think I should go... Just don't... That's all I'm saying. Be careful when you... Everybody in the audience. Do you think I should go to to to to to to to to to to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I to go I disagree to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi.e. I disagree thi. I disagree. I disagree thi. I disagree thi. I disagree thi. I disagree thi. I disagree thi. I disagree thi., that's all I'm saying. Be careful when you f- people's bank fees. Everybody in the audience. Do you think I should go to high schools as I do and talk to them about financial literacy and about credit card debt and about stocks and bonds? Is that a good thing to do? Totally. You should give them Jail Collins book, the simple path to wealth and one of the addendums should be turn off any program to to to to to th. the to th. the th. th. th. the the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. the. the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do you the. Do you theanananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananan. Do the. Do the. Do th off any program that I'm on. Besides Shark Tank. Besides Shark Tank. I'm very proud to be on Shark Tank. Shark Tank is awesome. Season 14. It's awesome. I teach high schoolers and I teach graduate MIT engineers. Look, there is a, you are allowed to have an opinion, and I'm

glad you do it. It's an important part of the dialogue and the and the discussion we're having here, but at the end of the day, the more people that understand the financial system in this country, the better this country is. Now you may not agree on the message, that's okay. And that's the wonderful thing about this country, we can have this dialogue and we fact you have the opinion. That's good with me. I appreciate that. And I appreciate it. And I really appreciate it. Do you want to do the small business thing? I'll do my pitch and then we'll wrap it. Okay. Let's do it. So you wanted to talk about small business. Let's talk about that and then we'll do my pitch to you and we'll let me tell you what we should be worried about in the th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I to be. I to be. I'm to be. I'm to be to be to be to be the the to be to be to be to be to be really. I'll to be really. I'll to be really. I'll to be really. I to be really. I to be. I I I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I really. I'll. to. to. to. to be critical but i want to hear you criticize this one okay

are you ready so everybody remembers p p p p p p p p p p yea all of our companies you know scamming too you know it's a try no i mean for the cameo you're doing the cameo you got a lot more than a for the government no i didn't do a lot of a jokes i i'm i i i i i i i i i i i i didn't you you you you. Anyways, all, you know it's funny. All of margins. You've done better jokes. You've done better jokes than that one. I'm going to give you a four out of ten. So look, let's get to, the point is the program was launched and all small companies used it, they went to their bank and got it. Same time another program was launched called the employee retention. their. their. thapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I's thi. the. the. I've tho. I'm tho. I've their their their their their tho. I tho. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I'm th hurting now because rates have gone up so high on them. You know people talk about 6% Fed

rate. Small business is borrowing at 18% now. They used to borrow it nine or seven. So it's been hell for them for the last two years. The government has 250 billion dollars sitting waiting for them to pick it up on their payroll because they forgot to go get it. It's sitting there. If if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if you their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. th. th. th. th. th. th. their th. their thi. their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their th. th. th. thi. thi. ttoday. te. te. today. te. today. te. te. today. te. today. today. today. they forgot to go get it. It's sitting there. If you have a small business between five and 500 people, you can make up to $26,000 as a gift from the government towards your business one time. So if you have 50 employees, that's half a million dollars. If you have 100 employees, that's 1.1 million. I'm pounding the drum everywhere I can to tell every company in America that qualifies

because you only have 23 more months to get it, go file. Go file for it. Thank you for sharing that information. Thank you. I mean, I think that's a very important thing. I mean, thanks. I think that's a very important. Tell me why that's a bad thing.

I think you're sharing a very important piece of information. Thank you. In a not entertaining way, but it's important nonetheless. But it's important. It's important, and it's great. How many people are entertained by $1.1 million cash? There we go. I'm entertained. Yeah. Okay.

I have Mr. O'Leary on the show. I got to pitch you. Go ahead. So here's my pitch. I think it's going to go badly. Yeah. Here's my pitch. I mean, I wonder why. This is my fish. I think you go on these shows. You are part of a system in the media, specifically financial hot-take media. The CNBCs, the podcast appearances. People turn to you for financial advice. They ask you. the that-you. the market. So, the market. So, the the that, so, so, so, the the the the th, th, th, th, so, th, th, so, th, th, th, th, th, so, th, th, th, th. I th- I the th- I th- I th- I the this this is, I this is this is, I this is, I this is, I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I this. I, I this. I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this is th, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I wonder, I'm the the the the the the the thi. I the thi. I that media, the CNBCs, the podcast appearances. People turn to you for financial advice. They ask you, how are the markets doing?

What's up? What's down? What are you into? You give your opinions because people turn to you because you're Mr. Wonderful. You obviously look like a successful entrepreneur and businessman. Advertently or inadvertently, you give people your opinion. People listen to that opinion and then make investment choices based on what they hear from you.

Do you think? I'm not only listening. Let me finish. to finish. You give those opinions. It creates potential chaos and risk at scale, because it's on the internet. And then you face no downside consequences when those people get fleeced.

That's not fair. Totally disagree with you. Is this a pitch where I invest? Is this a pitch where I invest? The second one, we haven't got to the end. Yeah, so let me tell you why. Wait, wait. the second part is, I've thought to myself, I go, hey, in here somewhere? It's not the end. The second part is, I've thought to myself, I go,

hey, you've clearly made picks and taken some massive elves, so he either cares about it and feels very bad about it, which you may, or you know you're taking those else, but if you keep the three-card Monty going and keep appearing on other shows and make other picks, you'll just bury the L's you had in the back. If you beat the algorithm, they can't even catch up to all the L's in the past. The problem is retail got left holding the bag a long time ago. So L, L for loser?

Yeah, or loss. So, I think what th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the their, the the their, their, their, their, their, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the, the the the the the the the the the the the they. the they. thr-l, thr-l, the, thease, tease, tel, tel, thel, thel, thel, thease, the. L, the the the the,. So I think what you do is good. I think you are entertaining on Shark Tank. When you leave that environment and give financial advice, people, regular people, potentially get hurt. So I mean this humbly, this is my pitch to you. I want to quote the great Laura Ingram. I think you should focus on your strengths and shut up in Shark Tank. No, you reverse that, right? You want me to, my strength is Shark Tank, you said, you want me to shut up on financial literacy.

Which one is it? No, no, no, your strength is... So when, okay, so jokes are great when you have to explain that? No, no, no, no. So she told LeBribb and Shribble. the strength is the strength is the strength. the strength. the strength is the strength. the strength. the strength. to to to to to to to to the strength. to to to my, to my strength. My, to my strength. My, to my strength. My, my strength. My, my strength. My, my strength. My, my strength. My, you, my strength. My, my strength. My, my strength, my strength, my strength, my strength, my strength, my strength, my strength. My, my, my strength. My, my strength. My, my, my strength. My, my strength. My, my strength. My, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to then using that and you just carry that. So I used to, so my whole point is my actual daytime job is managing capital, that's what I do. And I've been doing it for 30 years. And you know it's a career I'm very proud of and I'm proud of my reputation. I had some mistakes and losers and bad investments just like everybody else does. But long term, the best way to do it is always tell the truth and you never have to remember what you said.

And so everything I've told you is the truth, it's not all good news. And by the way, in investing, you are going to have some losers in investing. You've learned that tonight. Right. Of course. And so I wish I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. the. thoe thoe thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. te. tean. tean. tean. tean. tean. thauuuuu. tean. thauu involved in their lives or not that they're our losers in investing. That's what happens, but as you've suggested, the market does give you on average about a 9% return over a long period of time. When it's an S&P 500 so so the addendum is that you're in another tax bracket. Don't listen to what you're saying because you're bawling and you're the the the the the you're b you're b you're b you're b you're b you're b I the thin and you're b I thin and you're thin and you're thin and you're the thin and you're thin and you're thin and you're thing and you're thing and you're thing and you're thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thioling and you're thioling and you're thioling and you're thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi. thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. You can take the losses in retail camp. Mr. Kevin O'Leary, I want to say thank you so much.

Thank you very much to join in the show. And I want to say thank you for having this conversation and for us being respected one other. I appreciate you. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. And I pull up for the class. I mean, I'll pull up to the class. It's been said that Nice Guys finished last.

But is that really true? I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. But is that really true? I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk. We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring

egos and will delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper and dare to confront a formidable empire. The art of fairness on cautionary tales. Listen on the Iheartart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. That's our show for tonight. That's my time in the chair, but stay tune,

because your guest host for next week is gonna be Marlon Wayne. That's our show for the daily show podcast universe by searching the chair, but stay tune, because your guest host for next week is going to be Marlon Ways. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show, wherever you get your podcast. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast. Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last. I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question.

Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti will examine villains undone by their villainy. Monstrous, self-devaring egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the IHart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.