The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson: Body Wash vs. Bar Soap

Episode Date: August 1, 2022

What’s the best way to lather up: body wash vs. bar soap. Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and Daily Show writer Josh Johnson get on their soapboxes to discuss; what’s more hygienic? Washcloth or loofah? Scented or unscented?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Now, you're listening to Comedy Central. Hey, it's Roywood Jr. We've got a little something different for you today. Now, you remember before the pandemic you could stand around a water cooler and talk to your coworkers? We used to call it water cooler conversations, even though there was never really a water cooler there. Anyway, two of my good friends, daily show correspondent Dolce Sloan, and Daily Show writer Josh-Johnso, to, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, thi, cooler conversations even though there was never really a water cooler there anyway To about good friends daily show correspondent Dose Sloan and daily show writer Josh Johnson Are known around the building for their water cooler conversations and they turn it into a podcast this is your chance to hear these two people go back and forth the way we get to hear it all the time in the hallway the podcast is called Hold Up. Have a listen. Hey everybody, welcome to Hold Up. It's the show where we have a pretty passionate interaction. Pretty, pretty like, what's it called when it's from the soul? You know, that soul meat that you get, that dig deep into and then you pull from that, you know what I'm talking about?

Soul meat? Yeah, you know, you know, you know what I'm talking about? Soul meat? Yeah, you know, you know, when it's come from the heart, but it's even deeper. It's like deep down in your soul. Oh man, there's a, is there a word for that? I thought, maybe I'm wrong. Anyway, we're gonna have some pretty passionate conversations about things that are important in the world, in the culture, to us. It's the things that we disagree on. Even though we're friends, they're sometimes where, don't say something that's a little bit

out of pocket to me, in my mind that is like it cannot stand. Yeah, a little bit out of pocket. I'm always in pockets. I'm always, whether they're pants or pool tables, I am in the pocket. I'll tell you right now, a lot of your opinions are truly out of pocket and we're about to find out one of them today. Today, we're talking about something that is deeply important to the both of us. It's not a, it's not like the economy, gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy, the economy like the economy gas price anything like that we're never going to be talking about issues that could change the world this is about well this is more like it's I mean this could change the world I'm looking to change

hearts and minds oh truly because that's how you do it you know just one one person at a time but today we're talking about bar soap versus body wash and Joshua what is you thus you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that is just that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th th that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th that's th th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is thus thus thus the the the the thi the the thi the thi tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi time but today we're talking about bar soap versus bodywash and Joshua what is your stance I think I know what it is because you're a man but I'm all about the bar I knew you were gonna say that bars all right boo boo boo boo yeah bars I knew you were gonna say that I'm team team body wash and we okay listen you know I'm team body wash so so so so so tell me tell me the th tb tm tel tel tel tel tel tel tel tel tel tel tel me tel me tel me tel me me me the tel me the tel me the tel me tm tm tm tm tm tm tho tel tm tm tm the th th th th th th th I th I'm the the th I th I th I th I th I th I th th th th th th th th th th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I tel tel tel tel the tel tel the the te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te te the the you were going to say that. I am team bodywash. And we, okay. Listen, you know I'm team body wash. So tell me on a scale of one to 10,

how hardcore you are about the body wash. I'm gonna say like a eight. Oh, great, okay, because I'm an eight. So you're diametrically opposed, and I'll tell you right now, bars is where where where where where where where where thahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah bars, bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the th. the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that that that that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the. thi. the. the. right now, bars is where it's at, the original soap. All right, not this, not this, not this soap juice. Other people claim is worth it, you know? My bar stays ready. Soap juice? Yeah. You know what I'm talking about?

So, wow. That wash water? People... This is also how you know, some talking about? So wow. That wash water? People, because this is also how you know some people. Obviously, there's a spectrum with everything. There are lots of people that might say they love the same things I love, but they don't roll the way I roll, right? So I'm not speaking for everyone why I talk about boar soap. I'm not speaking for everybody when I talk about bars of soap, I'm not speaking for everybody when I talk about body wash, but I will say that some of my broker friends

love to add water to the bottle of body wash, acted like that's still the same strength of soap, and it is not. In the same vein, uh, when I associated with the broke, I try to change my life Josh, try to not deal with any man who has roommates. But my broker friends, they love bar soap. Because it's only 97 cents. But my broker friends, they love bar soap because it's only 97 cents or it could be 50 you see what I'm saying? Like you can buy in bulk.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Because this is my thing. This is what I'm saying. The example that I just gave was how some of my broke friends will dilute the soap to where it's less soap. I feel like you're coming for the people who found a discounted family dollar. I'm not, I didn't finish. All right, let me let you finish. Because we've all like, it's like dishwashing liquid, right? Like people add water to like dishwashing liquid and stuff like that.

So I understand in the vein, but we all know that you get down to that little sliver of soap and then you can keep those slivers and then make yourself a big, like a big ball, it's the same concept. Where you're like, let me save these slivers. And they could be a various. And they could be, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th. I, th. I understand, th. I understand, th. I understand, th. I understand, th. I understand, th. I understand, tha, tha, tha, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the same concept where you're like, let me save these slivers. And they could be a various... Yeah. And they could be, you've got a little dove, you've got a little Irish spring, you've got a little dial, and then you just put them all together to make the most skin drying concoction that the world has ever known. Let me take up for the daggers.

Let me tell you right now about the daggers, right? I love a good soap dagger because it helps you in the battle to shank the germs to death. Okay? A good a good bar soap dagger, I can lift that arm, I can slide that thing up. I'm getting, I'm getting even the dirt on the hairs and my armpits I'm getting in so good. But see, that's also my issue with bar soap is people have a tendency to put bar soap directly on the body. They're not rubbing it on a rag or a washcloth or a luf or a body brush, it's soap directly on the body. And then the next person is using this said soap and we all know the blast place that everybody cleans.

Two things, first of all. First of all, I would appreciate you covering the shower lingo with these foreign words. I want you to use. You have a washcloth, Josh. You have a rag. You didn't say washcloth. You were saying a loop. You were talking about Aleppo. I. And this. And the soap. And the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we the soap. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And we all. And the the the the the the the the the the the the. And we the. And we the. And the. And the. And the. And the. And the. And the. And the. And the sa. And. And. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. said. I said. said. I said. said. I said.. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I have a washcloth, Josh. You have a rag. You didn't say washcloth. You were saying a lupa. You were, you were, you were,

No, I said washcloth. No, I said washcloth, loofah, exfoliating gloves, a fluf, a body brush, anything that you use to apply your cleaning agent to go on. Not soap directly on humans, there needs to be a buffer. So for me, I don't like bar soap because it be going straight on people's asses, straight on genitalias, okay, straight in armpits, catching it just direct. And you know if you still got the letters on the soap, if you don't, because somebody will wash the soap, so you got the letters, you picked up a bar soap so, but the letters, the ne the the ne the the the the ne needs needs the the the the the the the ne, the the ne, the ne, the ne, ne, the the the their there, there, there, there's needs needs needs needs needs needs needs needs, the their needs, their th, their their needs, there's needs, there's need, there's need, there's needs there's needs needs their needs needs needs, their need, their their their their their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their needs, their their their thea, nea, neea, neea, nee, thea, thea, their thea, their their their their the letters on the soap, if you don't, because somebody won't wash the soap bar, so you got the letters, you picked up a bar of soap, but the letters in it and the letters was dirty.

Hmm. Okay, second, second point that I was gonna make is that there is no dirty soap, it's soap, so it cannot be dirty second. You see the be in the shower thing. What was that other thing? A f-fufa? Was that?

A lufa? I already heard. But then you said an F word. Exholiating gloves. Or a fluf. So those are the type of F words I would appreciate if this conversation. You've never seen the little like the little mesh puff in the shower? Let me tell, I want to tell you about my experience because I think it'll help color the rest of the conversation.

Don't you have a girlfriend that lives in your house? I do. I'm talking about how I grew up for a second. I'm talking about how I how I had my come up, you know, lived in Louisiana, lived in Chicago. I had an experience of growing up, and this is how you can tell that I didn't always have means. I grew up with dial soap. I understand that dial soap is basically gunshots to the skin. Okay, that's basically... It's a forest fire. You need to use a bulletproof vest when you wash with dial. It's a forest fire for your follicles. I don't even know if body wash have been invented yet, okay? Mmm, true, true, true. There wasn't a money where it just showed up. Yeah, it's, it's, it's a very like early 2000s thing. So it's been around like, you know, 20 years or such.

But I'm just saying for a 90s kid, I don't know if body wash was as much of a thing. Also, the dial soap that I use, it kept me clean. Yes, it was sometimes very easy for me to wash some of the skin, off the skin I was cleaning. But it kept me absolutely fresh. I just felt like I was well taken care of. It wasn't until later that I discovered Irish Spring that I discovered Dove. That I was like, okay, there's a different level to these bars. And so let me, let me bring my bar game up up up tha game tha game tha game tha tha tha thathere's a different level to these bars. And so let me bring my bar game up.

Now I will say for the bar, even for my barheads, right, for my bar boys, for my bar, bar, barbiturates. Shut. You're making somebody look up barbiturates and they're going to find out. That's not what you're talking about. For all of my bar heads, please use a washclash. Please. That is like two dual-sase point, a washcloth is what you should be using. Do not just hammer a bar soap into your body up and down. No. You're not doing what you think you're doing. Also makes a soap last longer because now we got barred can you can you tell me in earnest how long it takes you to get through a bottle of body wash versus a bar soap because a bar that bar is gonna see

you through a lot? It might just see you through graduation. Bar soap doesn't last as long for me as body wash does only because it's like the body wash that I have, like it has like a pump on it, right? Mm-hmm. So I get like the biggest bottle, I get the pump, I get the pump, the pump, I get this pump for this, and then I get a nut, so it's like I know how much soap I'm using when I use. You know you're like a three pump per shower type person. Three, four, you know, okay. Right, because I've got a face wash,

I've got a body wash, and then I've got, you know, hoo-ha wash, so these are all different things. Okay. Because you're not supposed to put bar soap on your thii. thin, you're not supposed to put bar soap on your face. Let me tell you then this, because I see where you're saying. I see where you're getting at, and you've led me perfectly to my next point, and I appreciate it.

Let me tell you why body wash is a liar. It's a deceiver, okay? Because a bar of soap will tell you what time it is every time. A bar of soap will be like, hey, I'm getting th soap, th soap, th soap, th soap, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoe, thoe, tho, tho, tho, th th th thoea, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, thoe, thoe, thoea, th th thooooo toea'er. toooooooooooooea. toea. toea. toea. toea. All right? You got three slivers of me now, that's all you got left. I can see when I walk in the bathroom, how much soap is left with a bar of soap. What I can't know until I pick it up and I feel the deceitful weightlessness of an empty bottle of bodywash. It's like you ever go to take a sip of orange juice,

and your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your your roommate, your roommate, your roommate, your roommate, your roommate, and your roommate their their their their th, your roommate th, your roommate th, your roommate th, your roommate the, your roommate the, your roommate theree, your roommate thereeating thoom left thi and your roommate thoometeeteenate, you're thoometeease, you thoomomate, you thoom, you thoom, you thoom, you tho, you tho, you to get to to to to to to to to to to to to to to get, you, you, you, you, and took, and sip of orange juice and your roommate left one half sip and then they put the whole carton back. I mean, that's what body wash does every time. Okay, to count on the point, there are bottles of body wash that are transparent. And there are bottles of body wash that are opaque. So my bottle of body wash is transparent. Going back to bar soap.

Originally, because I had to look up, because I've made bar soap before, right? There's different types of soap that you can make. There's the glycerin-based soap that you can get in like your Michaels or your other craft stores, or there's like the old school original soap. Yeah, that fight club soap. It's fight club soap and that is lie. Which lie is nothing to fuck with because I was making this lie soap and I was pouring it out and I should have a little eye protection.

Because when I tell you a grain, literally the size of the grain of sand got on my eyelid burn it was the tiniest little scarred burn if lie hits you and there's any type of like moisture on your skin burned immediately right so there's the lie animal fat yeah yeah water and I was like one who the lie, animal fat, water. And I was like, one, who the fuck figured this out? I mean, a serial killer. We owe so much to serial killers and we don't, we don't. Stop it.

We never give the credit. That's a crazy person that figured out, oh, we need some fat from an animal, and we need this pure acid. And then let's just mix it with some water, see what happened. Or this sounds like old school shit that came from like when we used to do bloodletting and when we thought all women were witches because they had an opinion. So like, also serial killers just so you know.

I mean, serial killers aren't new, but I'm saying it's like, you look at like how dangerous soap making and how caustic it used to be. And then we're like, okay, we've got these bars of soap now that's like, we took the lie out of them so you don't have to like kind of just burn the dirt off. I feel like sometimes with this bar soap because it's like, you always knew in middle school or high school when some boys started using Irish Spraying because I guess that's what they thought men smelled like. That's like, th, their their their their, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, their, okay, their, okay, okay, th, okay, th, th, th, th, okay, th, th, okay, th, okay, th, okay, th, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, that, that, that, that, the, thea, thea, thoooo, tho, the, the, because I guess that's what they thought men smelled like that's what their parents thought that men smelled like. That's dad soap right there Irish Spring? Irish spring? That's a hardcore you like if a kid had Irish Spring you knew he

had both parents in his life. If but if he was a elementary school kid using Irish Spring that's because you went to your dad's house this weekend. Mm-hmm. You had you had both their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their parents their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. th. that. th. that's their parents their parents their parents their parents their because you went to your dad's house this weekend. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, both parents. They might not have been in the same place. They might not have been in the same place.

Some days you come in and smell like Irish spring, we can tell where you've been. Right. But yeah, Irish spring is hard core dad soap. Right, and then Dove was supposed to be the softer one, like in the commercial it was literally like lotion layering up to make a bar. So it's like, you said this supposed to be moisterizing. That's what the lady said in commercial. And I've never been so dry.

I can't try. I can say for me, body wash. Or my mom likes to call it, body wash. For years we said that, I don't know why. I can remember what the joke is. But we go, mama needs some body wash. We're very silly people at my mom's house. Body wash is good for me because one, it didn't dry my skin out as much. Okay, because dial soap on the bar does come with the ash.

That is gonna, you areto look ghostly, you're going to look, you know, like dusty. You're going to look dusty, you're going to look ghostly. I truly, but like I remember dial soap was like, hey are you a mechanic? Get a day's work off your hands. And I'm like, oh why are we putting this on children? But we also have to both have to say that as a kid when you took a bubble bath, did you have bubble bath or did you have dishwashing liquid? Okay, so didn't take a lot of bubble baths, all right? I wasn't really living that lifestyle. I, uh...

You had a tub. So when you took baths... What it took to get enough bubbles in my bath was too much. So what I would have to do, and this is... You're gonna look at me different after I tell you this. So the same way that, you know, I lived off of the dial daggers and the same way that I just sort of went with, uh, white elbows. Okay. You can imagine from the imagine from the dryness. I used to run the water in the tub.

Yeah. And then put the bar soap underneath the running water. That would have been better. So then I put the running water, you know, bars over under running water for a little bit, let it, let it suds up. But if I felt like I wasn't getting enough bubbles that way, I would just start to sort of spin in the tub with the bar making like a little streak along the lines of the tub. Okay.

And then, you know, rub that, like, now I'm getting the tub, you know, now I'm building up the bubbles on the tub. And then that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was th th th th th th th th th th th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, the the th, the the the the the the the the the thumb, thin, the bub, the bub, the bub, the bub, the bub, the bub, the bub, the bub, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thu.. thu. thu. thu. thu. thumb, thub, tub, tub, tub, tub, tub, tub, tub, tub, tub,that was the closest I could come to like a hardcore bubble bath, because we didn't have the bubble bath, like liquid bubble bath, and- Oh, we've always had body wash, it's just the fucking bubble bath solution. Yeah, but people didn't know to do it standing up. Like it was a bubble bath, you know what I mean?

If you were taking a bubble bath into a the the the the the a bubble bath into the shower, people would think that you were a little off. Because then you was like, oh you just want bubbles to be raining down in. Yeah. Your shower. No, we would you, okay. But how would you like, 10, 8? Mm-hmm.

I was just try to figure out the best way to get enough soap in there to have a bubble like bath. Yeah. But, oof. Nah, dog, that's just kid logic. We would just use, because I was like the biggest bubbles that I knew came from washing dishes. Yeah, yeah. So we would just put dishwashing liquid in the tub. Mm-hmm. It made perfect sense to us. It does make lots of sense. Like it obviously is better bubbles,

but that is, you gotta be very careful with what brand you're using. Because you're not like a duck that's been covered in oil. You like a regular kid, just try to go about your life. If you want to talk about the moisture baked stripped, get the wrong dishwashing liquid in your tub. I'm going to ask you a quick question you just reminded me of a question I've had since we brought up the topic.

Yes, I wash my legs. No, I would. Would you rather, and this is, this to me goes to my point of bars of soap being superior, would you rather slip on a bar soap? Hmm. Or on a puddle or body wash? They're both slipping. They're both slipping But how about this bar soap? That's shot from under your foot. That's gone All right you you you just have to get your bearings now and and maybe you can catch yourself. You slip on a puddle of body wash and not only are you going down you gonna keep falling after you go down. It's gonna look like you fell down and

escalator going up. Okay, you are more likely to drop a bar of soap than you are to have puddles of body wash, right? If you drop a bar of soap, now you're in a hunt for the bar, you're gonna pick it up, and it's gonna slide out of your hands. Also, if you got a white dagger and a white tub, for a second you're gonna lose it, you gotta refine it. Okay, alright.

Now you're just in a fucking Charlie Chapman, wall and hearty type of, you know, Benny Hill, da da da da da da, da, da, da, da, and you're just having this bar, especially if it's, th.............. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, you're gonna, th, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're, you're gonna, you're, you're, th.... th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th. th. th. th. thin, thin, thin, tha, thin, t. tha, tha, tha, thin, tha, tha, tha, tha, you're gonna gonna gonna, th bar, especially if it's a big bar, if it's like good and like wet because you've been in the shower for a second, it, you're like, oh shit, I dropped the soap. Boom. Like, there's no dropping body wash jokes, but there's plenty of drop in a soap joke. That's only because soap is older than body wash there's been more time to write the jokes. Let me also tell you why that is soap slander and why that that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is soap slander and why your bodywash propaganda will not stand, okay, when you drop. This is the most intense I've ever seen. Like, you did not get in this intense.

When we were talking about the old, like the conscious rap versus club bangers. Yeah, you were not at this intense. But you are so team soap, team bar soap. I don't know if this comes from like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the fact, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. thi, thin, that, that, that, that, that, that, to to the, to thin, the, thin, the, the, the, the, you were not at this intense. But you are so team soap, team bar soap. I don't know if this comes from like the fact that like this is all you had for a long time. And you're just trying to not forget where you come from. Don't let them, do you like that, Josh? Like you can be, you're still gonna be clean, bro, like it's not. When it came, because it's like, because I want to know, are you still,

so like, how do you feel about bar soap now? Are you still like on a scale of like one to ten? Uh-huh. Are you still at a eight? I think you really pushed me to a nine? Wow! Because the slamander around bars are so, like you can't drop a bottle of body wash if your shower is big enough,

let's say, let's say what, because this is what happens when you drop a full bottle of body wash, it squirts out, all right? It doesn't have complete suction control on the top of that bottle, it's like, it slaps a little bit of body wash out every tip, tip, tip, tip, tip, tip, tip, tip, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th.......................... th.... th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. little bit of a body wash out every time you drop it I think because I have a bottle that's a pump I don't usually have those issues I also have never picking up my bottle of body wash because it is a pump and it sits on a on the shower rack so just go right up to it hit it bam because it's a dispenser all right It's a dispenser you can't you can't You can't do it's attitude with me talking about dispensers

Explained the concept of a push pump. Like I've never been anywhere. That's fine. So how about this? This is another thing that I feel is an important question for us to ask ourselves in the debate between bar soap and body wash. Let's say you're traveling. Now we're traveling. Now, look, you can have that little squirt, squirt of body liquid, whatever.

You know what I mean? In a little bottle with the... Your soap juice, right? I heard you. Uh-huh, with the soap juice. Or you could have a tiny little bar they can keep track of. They give you those in the hotel. And why do they? Why they do that?

Because it's a waste. It's a waste. Because you know what the hotel does? The hotel gives you a bar to use at the sink. But then the hotel also gives you a bottle of body wash, shampoo and conditioner. I'm a black person. I'm not using yourthat is in a bar. What hotels are you staying at?

Because sometimes I'm getting bars of soap at the sink in the bathroom and then a bar of soap in the shower. I mean, I understand what you're talking about. I've stayed in some places where they've had the shampoo and conditioner. I also don't use it. But, I mean, to just assume you're going to get free body wash. That's the other bottle. Some places thes thi places they's they's they's thiiiii they's thi. I thi. I thi. I they's th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I' thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm th. I'm th th th th thi th th thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I I I I th. I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm thate. I'm thate thatea thatea thatea thatea thatea thatea thatea thea thatea thea thatea thatea thate thate. I'm to just assume you're going to get free body wash. That's the other bottle. Some places even have mouthwash. Some places do. Both places don't. Well I've stayed at an A-Loft hotel and he, there was a dispenser in theenser, like pump dispenser, and it was body wash, shampoo, conditioner already in there.

You're telling me right now that you would rather travel with some unreliable, maybe the bottle's gonna leak body wash than with a small bar of soap. I know my soap. I know my soap. I know my soap. I know my bottles. I know how to pack. I don't check anything. For my face, there is a cleanser, there is a toner, there's serums, there's lotion. That's already four to five bottles just for my face.

Then body wash. Then hooja wash. That's two more bottles. Then my face. Then body wash. Then who I wash. That's two more bottles. Then my hair. Okay depending on where I'm going. I've got to have all my hair hair stuff. That's four more bottles. Never had a leakage issue. Probably maybe with some oil one time, but I know what I'm doing. So you would rather use all those bottles than to have one bar that could care of everything. You have one bar that tho. tho. th. th more more more more more more more more th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho th. tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho more more more more more more more tho more tho more more tho more tho more tho more tho more tho more th. T th. T th. T th. T th th th th th tho more more more more more th th th th th. That's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. their their their th. th. tho more more tho more tho more tho more tho more thoooooooooooooooooooooooooo. their thoooooooooooo. their their tho. their th all those bottles than to have one bar that could care of everything? You have one bar that takes care of everything? All you have to do is believe. No no no no I'm asking you Joshua Ezekiel Johnson okay if you use the same bar of soap to wash your ass to wash your face?

I use the same bar of soap. I don't use the same wash cloth. So you take body soap and put it on your face. Depends on the day. How do your face feel about that? Am I traveling? You know? I feel like my face is fine. I feel like I feel like I'm glowing some days. How about other days? Not everybody glows every day. I hear you, not everybody can be me. What I'm saying is, you. You're coming, you're coming at this thing with a level, just a slight, just a slight. Level of elitism. Not eliteism. It's, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, that I'm like, it, it, it, it, it, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th th th th that I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I that I th. that I that I feel, thi. that I feel like, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi elitism that I feel like it's odd because I was someone who when I was younger was starting to have skin issues right around 1415 I remember my mother came up to me to me by my chin and did me like this to the left to the right to the left to the left to the to the left to to the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toe. to to to to to to to to the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the my chin and did me like this, to the left,

to the right, to the left again, and she was like, oh you going to dermatologist. Because my mother believed in my acting career and didn't want my face out her looking like a cobblestone straight. So, since I was about 14, I had medication for my face. Okay. I had a face wash that I had to use. I had moisturizers that I had to use. Also, the skin on your face is different from the skin on the rest of your body.

So it's why I don't put the same soap on my face that I put on the rest of my body for the same reason that I don't put the same soap on my lady bits that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I put on the rest of my body for the same reason that I don't put the same soap on my lady bits that I put on everything else. So you mentioned before having all of these different bottles for all these different things. Let's get honest for a second because you were educating me earlier in the episode about the soap, about the process. Yes. Which one do you think has safer ingredients?

The bar of soap or the body wash? Because I've looked at the back of some body washes. And they've told a very breaking bad type story. There's a whole lab that could be put into a bottle of body wash. Meanwhile, the soap, sometimes depending on the soap you get, it'll just say the three ingredients you listed, a little bit of water, a little bit of lie, a little bit of fat. Are you Googling right now? So you're going to Google up, so it's a Google conversation now.

Listen, I'm... So we're not going off a feeling, we're going off a facts, let me go here. No, you're asking me about ingredients. Yeah, I don't know. I'll Google too. I'll Google too. So here. Give me, give me just a couple of the, a couple of the things. First of all, which is confusing, the first ingredient says soap. Thank you. No, no, no. The first and most important ingredient is what it's ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients.. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the ingredients. the ingredients. Yeah. the ingredients. Yeah. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the ingredients. the the ingredients. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I the ingredients. I the ingredients. I the ingredients. I. I. I the ingredients. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. Thank you. The first and most important ingredient is what it's supposed to be. Hold on. Dove Beauty Bar contains formaldehyde. It also contains butilated hydroxytolene, BHT, which is also suspected to be cancer-causing.

Now, wait a way we went, paribens? Now, hold on. So to be fair, let's wait, wait, wait, perabins? Now hold on. So to be fair, let's look up the ingredients of my suave body wash. Suave ocean breeze, just let people know I'm out here smelling like a vacation at all times. Or Josh is smelling like a hard day's work. Wow. Your bar's up had formaldehyde in it.

How much though? Little bit? Shut up. Shut up. Shut. Because now I, you acted like I'm just washing myself in pure formaldehyde now. Was it a little bit? Was it a little bit, was it a little something to take the edge off, you know?

Josh? We're not supposed to have put it has all of the don't you dare. Don't you dare? They used to put formaldehyde a nail polish and they had to take it out. I'm not eating the maldehyde. I'm just using it to scrape off some of the dirty of the day. Let me tell you something. If you really want to get scraped, okay, if you really want these skin cells to get all off that body, what you have to do is you have to go to a Korean sauna and get a body scrub. Because the soap that Korean sauna and get a body scrub. Because the soap that they got coming straight out South Korea.

I've never seen it nowhere else. I've never felt that. I've never seen that soap nowhere else. Is it a bar? I don't know. But it's not in the soap, it's in the gloves, friend. So help me out then. So now that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that that we're that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. that that. that that. that. that that. that that. that. that. that. that that. that. that. that. that. that. that that that. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the. the. the. the. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that we're talking about instruments and extra things being brought in to get the level of cleanliness. Yes Wouldn't you rather

That glove be holding a bar rather than a bunch of nothing rather than just a bunch of slippery pulp? No, I'd rather that glove have a body scrub professional in it. That's what I rather be in the glove because I know that the body scrub is not about the soap because they tell you before don't use any of the soap. Just get your skin, don't put on any soap because of the Korean sauna they have, sometimes have bar soap and some of them have body wash but a lot of the Korean saunas quit doing bar soap, because they're not as sanitae. their their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the body, the body, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the Korean sauna's quit doing bar soap because they're not as sanitary. So you're telling me that bars of soap, that like literal cleanliness manifest isn't sanitary? Because it's not fresh bars all the time and there's multiple people, a hundred, 200 people could go through here every day. So it's like if I see a bar soap with a woman's hair on it, I don't know what part of her body his hair. You just pick off the hair and go

no no no no no knowing. I'm not picking off a hair. Body wash is not that much more clean than bars of soap, all right? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not picking off a hair. Body wash is not that much more clean than bars of soap, all right? If you were squirting out your body wash and you caught a hair coming out of that body wash, would you be disgusted? No one is putting that, like, that's what I'm saying. It's like, bar soap is being applied directly to a body. Mm-hmm. And then thine thine thine thine thine thine thine thine thine, thine, I th, I th, th, th, I thin, I thin, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, thi. thi. a body and then being put back.

I don't know who used it before me. I don't know what kind of skin conditions that person can have. If we're dealing with a body wash with a giant pump with a dispenser, then the only soap that you interact with is a soap that comes in your hand. That soap has not touched someone else's body. That soap has not been sitting out here, that soap has not been, because you're also like in a hot environment. So it's a hot room, you're dealing with whatever skin conditions people may have, I can have what, you see what I'm saying?

I see what you're saying. I guess I'm just, I think there's something that I need to make known about antibacterial soap. It is like the surface of the sun to germs. Okay, so when I sit, when I see a piece of soap, I know that soap's clean because that's what soap does. Soap is just burning through germs whether they're on the body or they're in the air or they're on the soap. Do you really believe you believe you believe the words that are coming out of your mouth? You know good and fucking well, the last place somebody is going to use a bar soap is their ass and then you set that soap down. I don't know if you didn't wash that soap by beforehand or what else you could have

on this soap, what kind of crumbs could be on here? I don't know what you're doing. The soap resets, all right? No, not if you don't rest it off. You still have to wrist it off. You still have to rest it off. The soap got amnesia. Sir, you don't, you sound like me. Okay? Now you're just saying wild stuff for the Sagan saying wild shit. You don't believe you. I don't believe you don't believe you. You've never spoken this way. I don't know what these grand, like are you marrying soap? Like these grand just, these dissertations, these just floral serino de Bergerac, fucking Shakespearean sonnets, like where for out thou dove?

Like I don't know. I'll tell you right now. You don't know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know know, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you don't know, you don't know, you, you, you, you, you don't know, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, you th, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th. You th. You th. You, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th. th. th. th like where for out thou dove like I don't know I'll tell you right now You don't know what soap has done for me No, all right is got me through through what you use the work at a factory what you hell are you talking about? Were you a butcher at one point? Peeches? Peaches? Yeah, peaches? When do you smell like peaches? Did you steal your mother's soap?

I've smelled very fruity and, what's the other word? So you spelled fruity, floral, fresh? And yet fresh is in there too. I'm just trying to be at such a level of cleanliness. I don't even need the cologne. I put on the cologne. They're like, why are you putting on the cologne? Why are you covering up the beautiful smell, the soap that you've been using? So you like scented bar soaps. Now this is my question. Have you ever, if you're trying to get like a soap thope that doesn't have, I don't know, formaldehyde in it. Wow. I didn't do that.

No, I know you didn't do it, but you definitely came for it. I know that was a, that was a away side, that was a drive-by jab, you know? You acted like I wasn't going to hear it, like I couldn't see what you were doing. It's fine. It's fine. I've no idea about it. This is my question. Has this conversed because it's we've learned that your beloved dove soap is a legitimate chemistry set? Not on me. Not on me. That was Google. Yeah. That was Google. Go ahead. So have you considered using a different bar soap that is not used that doesn't have ingredients that is used to preserve the dead? Fine, fine.

Okay. Okay. I can concede that there are a lot of bars out there that are made slightly of poison. Yes. And that there are body wash ingredients that are more moisterizing. Yes. Can you concede that a lot of this body wash stuff is just flip it, insane, watered down soap juice that they're trying to appeal to the masses with. Wow, by making it green and blue.

No, because so many soaps come in liquid form. You've got your dishwashing liquids. You've got your washing detergents, you understand? So I can't concede that it's watered down soap juice because there's so many soaps and detergents that come in liquid form. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

Okay. Well, I hear where you're coming from? I appreciate you and I appreciate the conversation. I also appreciate you all listening. This has been a hold up with Dose Sloan and Josh Johnson. We're here every week, taking you down through the nitty gritty of the things that are most important in the world and in the universe. We appreciate that you tuned in. We hope you'll do it again. Please tell a friend and tell everybody that you know.

And let us know how you, what your stance is on bar soap versus body wash. Now usually I would take this as another opportunity to maybe say something slightly weird to Josh, sorry slightly rude to Josh or say something else to make my point. But I want you, the listeners, to give us your unadulterated, un-diluted, uncovered and pubic hair effects. Fine. Fine. Fine. Thank you so much. Thank you everybody for today. That's the episode. Y'all have a wonderful, a blessed week and weekend. Yeah. You all have a wonderful and blessed week and weekend. Listen to hold up on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. show weeknights at 11 10 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus.

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