The Daily Show: Ears Edition - ICYMI: Jon Stewart Talks Israel Support and Michael Kosta Covers Biden's Student Debt Relief Plan

Episode Date: April 13, 2024

Jon Stewart calls out America for abandoning its values in its support of Israel and Ronny Chieng and Grace Kuhlenschmidt check in with Jon from the 2024 eclipse's path of totality. Plus, Michael Kosta covers the aftermath of the solar eclipse, how a guilty verdict against the parents of a Michigan school shooter set a new gun violence precedent, and President Biden's new student debt forgiveness plan.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. You're listening the world ended. I think, are we even, are we still on?

I don't, there was an eclipse. It happened. The sun and the moon did the thing that everyone's been saying they were going to do for centuries now. The path got totalityed and now both planets will go back to years of ignoring each other before they inevitably hook up again. Textbook toxic relationship but not everyone was happy about today's celestial seasonings. For danger lurks. A Fox News alert a rare celestial event collides with a policy failure on the ground. The southern border will be directly in the path of totality today when the moon covers

the sun for nearly four minutes. We are told that officials are bracing for higher traffic than usual, and that means a real opportunity for smugglers and cartels and migrants to come right in. Or they could just wait till night time. They really, they don't have a eclipse. Four minutes. I gotta say that. Is there nothing Fox can't tie to immigration? This year, cicada infestation provides perfect cover for Venezuelans. Of course, if you combine the dangers of today's eclipse with Friday's seismic activity in the Northeast, well, a more troubling picture emerges.

Republican Congresswoman Marjor Taylor Green tweeted that the earthquake and Monday solar eclipse are a sign from God that Americans need to repent. How, how do you know that that is what God meant? Why would God be so obtuse? Why would he do that? Or she? Why would she? Why would she? Why would she? Why would she? Why would she? Why would she? Why? Why, the? Why would she? Why, the the the the the the the the? the? the? the the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e? the e. the ea? the ea? the ea? the ea? the ea? the ea? they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the ea? the the the the the that that is what God meant? Why would God be so obtuse? Why would he do that? Or she? Why would she? Or how crazy would it be if God insisted on they them? But honestly, is this shit really how God works? Is this shit really how God works? I must let man know to repent their wickedness. How Lord? Well, I don't know, dim the lights for like four minutes.

Very specific path. And, God, what else? Give New Jersey a little shake, maybe? Enough to render the buildings to rubble and to bring people to their knees in repentance and atonement? No, just a little like, Jersey. Just a little nooky, like, oh, Jersey. Buhh.

Buh. But divine messaging aside, it was the biggest story of the weekend. So for more on the Eclipse, we have full-team coverage. Let's go live to Ronnie Chang in Caraville, Texas. And Grace, whooomishman in Niagara Falls. What a day, what a spectacular day. Grace, what is the mood out there in Niagara Falls? It's Eclipse Day!

The sky was dark, but the moods were bright because this event was out of this world. Oh, fantastic. John? Oh, Grace, that's fantastic. Ronnie. Thanks, John. The eclipse was fine, but they don't make a special kind of glasses that allow us to look truly, directly at the horrors that are occurring around the world,

especially in Gaza. That's very true, Ronnie. Very true. Those are powerful words. Grace. Oh. Gaza. Gaza. It's terrible.

Not terrible. Not terrible was the crispy cream special edition solar eclipse donut I had earlier. It was in the path of tastality. It was really good. Is that a tambourine? Oh. No!

No, no, no, no, no, well, technically, it is. Um, I was going to do an eclipse dance, but it doesn't seem appropriate. I'd really like to see the dance. Yeah, do the daytime, block out the sun. It's so fun. Family and friends. The joy never ends. Yeah, you know, that dance reminds me of the moral dance we all do every day to hide our complicity in the world's atrocities. And I hope that was clear in my dance. Thank you both very much. Grace and Ronnie, everybody. Well done. That was clear in my dance. Thank you both very much. Grace and Ronnie, everybody.

Well done. But the other big milestone from the eclipse is, as Ronnie mentioned, the war in Gaza is now six months old. I think time for a wellness check. But as the war has grinded on, justice is beginning to seem more like cruelty. But not to worry. America, the shining city on a hill, is on the case with our universal values. In the great battle for freedom, between a rules-based order and one governed by brute force.

In this battle, we need to be clear-eyed. And just to clarify, we are the freedom folks. We're the rules people. We're not the brute force ones. th. America. America. America. America. th. America. America. th. America. America. th. America. America. America. th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- the th- the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. America. th- th-we. th-we. th-we-wee-wee-wee-wee-wee-wee-wea-wea-wea-wea-wea-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s. the-s. the need to be clear-eyed. And just to clarify, we are the freedom folks. We're the rules people. We're not the brute force ones. I think we all know who the brute force ones are, in this case, Vladimir. And know that America will call you out when you violate the basic tenets of humanity. Weaponizing food, using it as a tool, as a weapon in its war against Ukraine, it's unconscionable. Should not happen. It's unconscionable.

Weaponizing food in Ukraine is not kosher, nor halal. Sorry if I'm both sidesing this. Speaking of which, there is a literal famine in Gaza caused by the war. I assume America will also consider this unconscionable. Absolutely, we're concerned about that. No question about it. Well, you can't sown. Well, you can't spend, spell.

to spence. the con-s sowne. the tooen, you get the point. How about the free press? Ordinarily, we are strongly in favor of free press. We also condemn the Russian government's continued targeting and repression of journalists. You hear that, Russia? We condemn. In no uncertain terms, any repression of a free press. I think you all know what's coming next. More journalists have been killed in Gaza in six months than anywhere else in the world.

And a new Israeli law says they can ban media outlets, they consider a threat. So as it relates to Al Jazeer, zero specifically, we've seen the reports. If it is true, if it is true, a move like this is concerning. Don't remember we're concerned again. How about if it's true, we condemn it. And by the way, is it true? Like, feels like you could probably just call someone and be like, is this true? And if they're like, yeah, it's true, but concerning. Well, you know what, perhaps these are just peripheral issues.

What about the bedrock rule of international law? No taking land by force. When Russia does it, we're pretty clear. The entire world has a stake in making sure that no nation, no aggressor is allowed to take a neighbor's territory by force. The American people will never waver on our commitment to those values. Ehh. Eish. See, this is where Israel's action gets interesting. Because you might say Israel's war is different than Ukraine's.

Israel's responding to an attack and a hostage crisis, but in the midst of that, they pulled a little something in the West Bank on March 22nd that might be notable. As the U.S. Secretary of State Anthony Blinken made his latest visit to Israel, the Israeli government announced that it was declaring state land, only 2,000 acres of land, only 2,000 acres of land in the occupied West Bank. This latest Israeli appropriation is the largest land transfer since the Oslo Accords were signed in 1993. 1993, and that's not even Gaza, that's the West Bank. So you can't say it has anything to do with defending yourself against Amas. Let's see if America upholds its rule against taking land.

I haven't seen the specifics of this, but anyone taking steps that makes things more difficult, more challenging this time, it's something that we would have a problem. You don't know about it, they did it the day you fucking visited. Why do we tip-to-around on eggshells? They slap America in the face and our responses. Well, if anyone slapped us in the face and our responses, well if anyone slapped us in the face, it'd be concerning, that's for sure. I mean raising a hand to a delicate body part of the face. If true, the verbal gymnastics that the American government must

undertake so as not to offend the delicate sensibilities of a country we provide most of the weapons for is, yeah! Every time America tells the world that there's that that that th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the the the tho the the the tho tho their tho their tho tho- their their their their their to toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe to to toe toe toe toe toe toe toe, I toe, I toe toe toe toe, I toe toe toe toe toe, I toe, I toe toe, I toe, I toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, their toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe country we provide most of the weapons for is yeah! Every time America tells the world that there's something we won't allow, Israel seems to say, challenge accepted. Are they willfully trying to provoke us? Or perhaps they're just reading our principles from right to left. It's over. It's really, be honest. Over, it's really, be honest, it's kind of a bar.

It's a joke, but that's it. Over 30,000 have died in Gaza since the war started. Some of them Hamas soldiers, 13,000 of them children. Our response. Since the early hours, we've been urging our Israeli counterparts to act with as much precision as they can and they're targeting. Our constant efforts to urge the Israelis to be as precise and careful as possible. We can still continue to urge Israel to be more careful and more precise.

The need for the Israeli defense forces to act with precision. We continue to to work with the Israelis to make that th th th th th th th th the the the their their their their their their their their their continue to work with the Israelis to make sure that they are as precise as they can be. See, they're not listening. Have you tried synonyms for precision? We continue to stress to our Israeli counterfaust that they be as discriminant and careful, they're targeting as possible. to be as cautious and deliberate. to be more careful and more deliberate, more deliberate, more deliberate, cautious way possible, the utmost care.

A special burden, to be mindful. To be mindful? What is this? What is this? Hot yoga? We just, you know, we've seen the bombing and... And... We are urging Netanyahu to be present. What the f-fix are we doing here?

The subtext of all this is America knows this is wrong, but it apparently doesn't seem to have the courage to say it in a straightforward manner. American Israel both know that you cannot bomb your way into safety. We learn that lesson in Iraq and Afghanistan. They learned it in the the the the their the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the, the the, the the the, their the, their their their their their their their their their the, their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their, their, their, their their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their have the courage to say it in a straightforward manner. American Israel both know that you cannot bomb your way into safety. We learned that lesson in Iraq and Afghanistan. They learned it in southern Lebanon. They laid siege there, occupied the southern area for 20 years. All it did was birth and strength in Hezbollah. And they're about to do it all over again, and we are letting them. Real friends take the fucking keys because friends don't let friends bomb that much.

And after this recent week, with so much horror, perhaps America finally finds the need for a new approach with Israel, with more justice and less cruelty. The U.S. and Israel are closing in on what would be their largest weapons deal since the war in Gaza began. Well, I don't know about you, but if that's true, I find it concerning. And with that devastating conclusion, we turn for more analysis. Back to Grace Coolidge, but Grace. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, not again. Hey, everybody, John Stewart here.

I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. Let's kick things off with yesterday's solar eclipse, when people across the continent came together to have their wallets stolen while they were distracted by space. Hopefully everyone wore the correct safety glasses so they didn't catch COVID from the sun, but even if you did wear them,

you still might have a solar hangover. Google Trends report shows some of the Eclipse watchers may not have been using proper eye protection. The company says it saw a spike in searches of, my eyes hurt following the solar eclipse on Monday. My eyes hurt? That's not even a question.

That just sounds like people were complaining to their computer. My eyes hurt, Google. Get some friends, losers. By the way, I hate that Google uses our searches to monitor trends. That's why you've got to throw up some fake searches every day. Like, I'll put in my eyes hurt plus something random like hockey skates, edible, just to throw it off. But this story does say a lot about the state of our health care system. Back in the day if you had eye pain you'd call up your family

doctor and he'd tell you to smoke more cigarettes. Nowadays you have to wait six weeks to get an appointment with your eye doctor or you can go online and immediately find out that the eclipse glasses that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. I th. I's th. th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's is is th. I's is th. I's is th. I's is th. I's is th. I is th. I is th. I is is is th. th. I is is th. th. I is th. th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I's is th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's te. I'm te. I'm. I'm. t. t. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. out that the eclipse glasses gave you autism. Look, the good news is for most people, the pain is probably a harmless case of eye strain. You'll be fine, because those glasses were made from the same high-tech advanced material as the birthday crown they give you at Burger King. Now, speaking of looming shadows over America. Let's move on to gun violence. America treats its gun problem the way a dog treats a new baby by hoping that if we ignore it, it'll disappear.

But at this point, any progress, no matter how small, would be better than the status quo. And now, a legal verdict might have set an important precedent. Breaking today for the first time in the United States. Parents, whose son killed four teenagers teenage teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers teenagers tiages tiages the tiages tiages their their the Breaking today for the first time in the United States. Parents whose son killed four teenagers will themselves spend 10 to 15 years in prison. The Crumblies provided unrestricted access to the gun, ignored their son's spiraling mental health problems, and enabled his actions by ignoring all of the warning signs. School staff testified that parents were called to the school and urged to get Ethan's psychological help just hours before the shooting, but the crumblies refused to take him home.

That's right. For the first time ever, parents are going to be liable for their kids' school shooting, which honestly makes sense to me. We already blame the parents. We already blame the parents. When a kid has a stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid to the the to the their to their. their. their. their. their. their. their to to their to their to their their to their their to their to their their to to their to to their to their to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the parents for a lot less. When a teenager throws a loud party, we blame the parents, or when a kid has a stupid haircut, we blame the parents. We should blame the parents when a kid shoots up a school. And why stop with the parents? The grandparents raise those parents. So throw them in prison too.

In fact, go all the way up the family tree. You know, great grandparents, exhum all the bodies and put them in a special ghost jail. And yeah, and if you're thinking, wait, wait, wait, wait, we have to build ghost prisons now? Wouldn't it be more reasonable just to regulate guns? Yeah, I don't ever want to hear again that I'm a bad parent just for giving my kid an iPad, okay? The worst thing my kid is going to do is go to school and talk in a Peppa Pig accent all day.

Let's move on. To some presidential news in our ongoing coverage of Indecision 2024. If you're like most young Americans, you have thousands of dollars of college debt after getting your degree in Tick-Tock gender studies. Thankfully, President Joe Biden is here to help. President Biden unveiled his latest effort to free up more Americans who are bogged down by student debt. The plan announced during a visit to Wisconsin includes debt cancellation for those who now owe more than they borrowed

because of runaway interest. We plan to deliver up to $20,000 in interest relief to over 20 million borrowers. Whoa! Yeah! Wow! Wow! $20,000 in interest relief to over 20 million borrowers. Whoa, yeah. Wow. That's a nice forgiveness. Speaking of, interesting that they call this student debt forgiveness, as though the student did something wrong. We forgive you for being a poor, broke bitch.

But as long as Biden's paying off student loans, how about paying off the other debt college kids incur? You know, my buddy Greg never got me back from that time. I spotted him for the Seedu rental in Panama City. Where's my check, Joe? But this is a reminder that college is too expensive. Tuition, room and board, books, a computer to create a social network that'll one day ruin democracy. It adds up. Now some critics are saying that this student loan forgiveness is just a cynical bribe by Joe to give young people what they want so they vote for him.

And they're right. It's an ancient tactic called politics. And Joe Biden better hope it works because he really, really needs young people. In the 2020 NBC News exit poll, candidate Biden led former President Trump by 24 percentage points among voters under 30. But in NBC survey in January had President Biden up by just 8 percentage points among voters under 30. their today, thrown by 18 points among voters under 30.

Are you excited to vote for President Biden? I would personally say no. I'm excited to vote for someone that's not Trump, but I wouldn't say that it is, I'm excited for Biden. Oof, man, Joe Biden is in trouble. The most liberal city in a critical swing state in its college students around the fence. I'm excited to vote for anyone besides Trump. What about Joe Biden? No. So the big question is, will this new plan work? To help us answer that question, we go

live to our own Josh Johnson. Josh. Josh, you've been talking to young voters. What do they think of Joe Biden's student loan cancellation? I'll be blunt, Michael. They think it's bullshit. Okay? Young voters have deep principal problems with the Biden administration. He has failed us on climate change, social justice and immigration. And the way he eats ice cream is nasty.

These are serious failures. They need to be addressed. Young people don't want to bribe. They want a leader the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. to to to th. th. th. to th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. thi. thi. thiole. thiole. thiole. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their. to. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to They need to be addressed. Young people don't want to bribe. They want a leader who will secure our future. Biden is not going to paper over these foundational shortcomings by promising us $20,000. Okay. What if he offered $25,000? Yeah, we'll take it. Okay. Yeah. But, that was easy. That was too easy. Josh, what aboutthat, yeah, yeah. But, that was easy. That was too easy. Josh, what about 21,000? Hell no, you're going to offer money on matters of principle?

What, 24,000? Deal. Twenty, twenty, twenty-two-fifty. Uh-uh, twenty-three. Ooh, here we go, Joe, Build Back Better Baby, all right? Oh, wow. He already has the money. Josh Johnson, everybody. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching The Daily Show, wherever you get your podcasts.

Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a comedy central podcast. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?

Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcast.