The Daily Show: Ears Edition - If You Don't Know, Now You Know - Stock Trading in Congress | Rick Glassman

Episode Date: January 27, 2022

Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer announces his imminent retirement, Trevor examines the ethics of stock trading by members of Congress, and actor Rick Glassman discusses "As We See It." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Our journey as humans is very inspiring, but not to like animals. Like we're like, look how far we've come. And every animal on the planet is like, these motherf-hawks. It's because it chopped down our houses and they kill us to wear us, dog. They just wear us. What do you mean wear us? Yo, they're going to take your back and they're going to put it on their back.

But what do they have on their back? Nothing, clearly, you. Don't they have skin? Nah. Well, they've got it, but it's like useless apparently. I don't know what happened with their skin. And so they're just going to wear the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations the conversations their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their till this day. Imagine chickens talking to each other. Yeah, you know what gives them good dreams is like the feathers of our ancestors. What? Yeah, they need to sleep on our dead bodies for a good night's sleep.

What? Can they not make the pillows out of anything else? They can, they can, but they don't like to. What were the other options? Well, they used to use cotton that some of them had picked. Yeah. Jesus, these people are monsters. I know, I know. Anyway, I'll chat to you later. I've got to go turn into a bucket of pieces that they're not going to finish.

See you later. Coming to you from the only city in America. It's The Daily Show, Ears Edition. Tonight. Bye-bye, Brian. Now Congress is getting rich. And Rick Glassman. This is the Daily Show with Trevor Noah. Hey, what's going on, to the Daily Show.

I'm Trevor Noah. And joining me for today's headlines is our very own, Ronnie Chang. What's going on, Ronnie, how you doing? Hey, Trevor, good, th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. thi. thi. Bye. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. t. te. te. tre. today. today. today. to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. thi. to the Daily Show, I'm Trevor Noah, and joining me for today's headlines is our very own, Ronnie, how you doing? Hey Trevor, good to see you again. Well I'm doing okay, but I got COVID like five weeks ago. And wow. Yeah, it was intense. It felt really sick. I'm glad I recovered.

But I think I may have some lingering headaches, brain fog, and the worst part about COVID is afterwards I look at Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox news and I just feel nothing. Like you've lost... Yeah, just lost complete interest. Like I'll be scrolling, I'll see them like biting each other's tongues or something, and I'll be like, I don't care about this. And, you know, I just, I hope in a few months, this goes away and I once again can enjoy Megan Kelly Machine Gun Fox news. You see that's part of the thing it's happening to you now even mixing up there. Oh did I just mix it up? Damn. I'm sorry man. It's all right you know. Geez Ronnie well it could be worse. I'm glad you're getting better and I hope that you care about them again one day. Thank you Roy. Poof. Well thanks for being here. All right let's jump straight into today's

headlines. We kick things off with major news out of the Supreme Court. Yes, the second most powerful court in the United States right off to Judge Judy. Out of all the justices on the Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme Supreme the Supreme the Supreme the Supreme the Supreme the Supreme the Supreme the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. tooes. tooes. tooes. to is is is. to. to. to. to is. to is. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. t. to. te. to. te. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to Judge Judy. Out of all the justices on the Supreme Court, the oldest one is Stephen Breyer. And you know how it goes with old Supreme Court justices. Eventually, whether they like it or not, they go and meet the one true judge. So, Democrats have been relentlessly pestering Brier to step down so that they can replace him before Mitch McConnell comes back into power and makes a rule that all Supreme Court justices have

to have been platinum Q&N members in the past. And today, Breyer finally made the Democrats' dreams come true. Breaking news, a bombshell announcement out of the U.S. Supreme Court reverberating across the nation's legal and political landscape. CNN has learned that Justice Stephen Breyer plans to retire. Breyer is 83 years old and he has resisted calls to retire from liberals who want President Joe Biden to have a Supreme Court nomination slot that he can use this year. Apparently, Breyer has decided to move forward with that retirement now and it sets up a

political battle here for President Biden who will have the opportunity to nominate a Supreme Court justice as a result. Justice Stephen Breyer, the leading liberal on the court, he will retire. We're still not exactly sure of the timeline but presumably not until the end of this term which ends at usually at the end of June. This is big y'all. Justice Breyer is retiring. Yeah, probably to focus more on his ice cream brand. I don't know. But honestly, no one should be surprised by this news, right? It probably isn't fun being hounded all day by people screaming at you to retire. I mean, imagine it. Think about everywhere this guy goes. People are telling him he should be retiring. He's probably in line at the grocery store and people like, retire, bitch!

Is it Starbucks, the name on the cup is retire, bitch? He's at the synagogue, and the rabbiah, retire, bitch. And right now, a lot of Democrats are relieved, but I don't know, people. I feel like the only winner here is going to be Mitch Miccarn, mc-Mich-Mcahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah, the the the the the thii-in, thi-in-in-in-in-miss-in-miss-miss-miss, their-m is their-m is their is their-in-in' is their-m is their-m, their-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i, the name is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their-in, their-in-in-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i. Hea-mi. Hea-mi. He's-missue. He's-missue. Hea-missue. He's-mi. He's-mi. He's-mi. He's thi. He's the-i'm just scarred. Yeah. Because even though the Republicans don't control the Senate, don't be shocked. Don't be shocked when Mitch still makes it happen. He's just going to come out like, more, it's a longstanding Senate tradition that we cannot confirm a Supreme Court justice in a year

where there's a new season of Ozark and Netflix. We all got to watch it first the first process what happened. That shows crazy shit, man. Now as to the speculation about who will replace Breyer, President Biden has already promised that if he gets the chance he's going to nominate a black woman to the Supreme Court. Which you've got to admit, that's going to be a really powerful moment, you know? When he's giving that speech, it's going to be really special. Until he says that she's the finest Negro judge of the Negro League's and, you know, come on, man. Come on, man.

Well, you know, Trevor, we're going to go racial with the Supreme Court judge thing. I just want to put it out there that Asian Americans have a really strong history of jurisprudence in America. I mean, OJ. Simpson Simpsonrial? That was us man. Judge Edo. Goat. He did that stuff. So if you like that outcome. Also, I don't know how many times I have to say this on the show, but I have a law degree and also I am extremely judge it. You know what I mean? I judge everything. When I wake up, I'm judging everyone. I'm judging you right now. Like your suit, what was that, polka dots? That looks like shit.

I'd be perfect for this role. You know what I'm saying? Also, in America, there's only two jobs with lifetime appointments. That's the host of prices right, and Supreme Court judge, which means you can't get fired, Trevor. Do you know how much shit I would talk if I couldn't get fired? No, no, tell me, Ronnie. I would talk so much shit.

I'll be so much more free to express myself. And isn't that what being America is about? Being free? Yeah, I would love to know all the things you have to say about to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to So let's work to make this happen. Biden, I'm available. I like to announce my candidacy for Supreme Court of the United States. Vote for me on Twitter. Thank you, Ronnie, and that's a powerful statement. It's not polka dots. They're little like squiggly things. Okay, they look like shit. Anyway, let's move on to the big entertainment story

everyone's talking about today. It's about Disney movies, which everyone loves, right? We all love Disney movies, especially the classics. They're the reason that we all believe in true love and all hates our stepmothers. And Disney loves remaking those films because Disney rarely understands the value of money. But as the originals get remade, people start to notice things that don't quite work in the modern era,

as one famous actor just pointed out. Walt Disney Studios on the defensive, following harsh criticism by Emmy-winning actor, Peter Dinkledge, over the upcoming live action adaptation of the 1937 Snow White and the Seven Dwarves starring Westside story actress Rachel Zegler. I was little taken back by the very, they're very proud to cast a Latino actress as Snow White. Yeah. But you're still telling the story of Snow White, yeah. Seven D dwarfs. You're progressive in one way and then, but you're still making that

f-backward story of seven dwarves living in a cave to get what the f-shunder. You're doing, man. Disney releasing a statement responding to the backlash, writing in part, to avoid reinforcing stereotypes from the original animated film, we are taking a different approach with these seven characters and have been consulting with members of the dwarfism community. Oh boy. All right. Let me start by saying this from the beginning. I am not a dwarf. So if Peter Dinklidge says that this is a problem, I'm not going to say that he's wrong. Because I've never watched Snow White and found the dwarves offensive, right? But I do understand what he's talking about. I genuinely do. Because if that movie was called Snow White and the Seven Blacks, I mean, that would be weird.

And you could tell me, oh Trevor, no, the blacks are actually the heroes. It's still a great story. Let me tell you something, that's still a white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, tho, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, the white, threate, threathineau, the blacks are actually the heroes. It's still a, it's a great story. Let me tell you something, yo, man, that's still a white lady and her friendly blacks. I would still set off my spidey sense. And look, I wish Disney the best of luck in this thing. Personally, I wouldn't toubsts, the today's still seven dwarfs living in the forest. I don't think it's a great idea.

And that's not even the biggest issue of all, because don't forget, the whole story revolves around a woman being drugged, and then some dude comes and kisses her without her consent. And I know Bill Cosby's now available for the role, but that's not the point. Just saying this thing is, you know? Yeah, well, look, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, that, thi, the that, the that, the the the the the the the the the thi. th we just give Disney a chance and let's judge the movie after it gets made? I mean, Disney has had a good history lately of like updating

things and making character three-dimensional and bad guys good, right? Like, look at Cruella, right? From 101 Dalmatians? Okay. Literally, the cruel devil is her name and she kills puppies. And then they put Emma Stone in the prequel, it the the te. the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie. the movie. the movie movie. the movie. the movie. the movie. the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, after, the movie, after, the movie, the movie, after, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the. Literally the cruel devil is her name and she kills puppies and then they put Emma Stone in there in the prequel. It turns out some puppies killed her mom. And then you go oh now I know why you were killing puppies in the second thing so I'm just saying giving him a chance. Anyway let's talk about Joe Rogan. The King of Podcasts and Aaron Rogers personal physician. Whatever you think about him, Rogan is one of the King of Podcasts, and Aaron Rogers' personal physician. Whatever you think about him, Rogan is one of the most influential voices in America

right now, because 11 million people listen to his show, 11 million people. Yeah. And some of what they hear is a little suspect, right? You know, whether it's misinformation about COVID or whatever was happening here. What did Michael, Eric Dyson call you? A mean, angry white man? Mean, yeah, and a mean angry white man. Hilarious. Yeah, yeah. You're not mean at all.

I am white. Actually, that's a lie, too. I'm kind of tan. And he was actually not black. He was sort of a ta. Black and white thing is so strange because the shades are so... Tan and brown. There's such a spectrum of shades of people. Unless you're talking to someone who is like 100% African from the darkest place where they're not wearing any clothes all day and they've developed all that melanin to protect themselves from the sun, you know, even the term black is weird. Oh my god. I'm not black. I'm not black. I'm not black. Joe Rogan's red. I'm like a caramel mocha of Frappuccino. This, hell, this changes everything!

This changes everything! This changes everything! Everything! The police said I'm black. But yeah, apparently Joe Rogan really wants to know why they say black people if they're not the color of a Sharpie. And this actually is a common question. In fact, when my brother was five years old, he asked me the exact same thing. And I know a lot of people are upset about this But look at the upside at least Joe Rogan wasn't talking about vaccines

So that is a step in the right direction. Right? Let's acknowledge that you know What was weird about this whole thing was Rogan's guest or Jordan Peterson saying that his skin is tan? My man, you're not tan. Like, that guy is, that's white. If anyone buys skin tanner and they end up looking like Jordan Peterson, they should sue the company. Have you seen his skin color? Like, he could be snow white.

The thing that these guys seem to be ignoring is that Black people didn't call themselves black. You understand that, right? Not like black people were like, we're black, no. In Africa, we have tribes, we have cultures, Zulu, Hosa, Baganda, Igbo, Wakandans. But then white people got there, and they're like, wow, there's a lot of black people here. Lot of black people.

Yeah, then in America, they invented a rule that if you had one drop of black blood in you that makes you black, which defined how you were treated by the government and by society. Even vampires wouldn't bite you. Like I thirst for that blood, but I'm applying for a mortgage, I can't risk. You know, what, Trevor, I mean, look, Joe is right, man. I gotta agree with him on this one. Race is fluid. Like, what is race? Like, one time I put th, I, I, I, I, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I th one, race is fluid. Like what is race? Like one time I put on like a Korean charcoal face mask and I felt kind of Asian until I put it on

and I realized it was black face. And then I started thinking, hey man, I can really emphasize with a struggle. And since I said that out loud, I got canceled, which made me feel white. And I had the stuff on the bottom of showbiz again, which made me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me th and I, I, I, I, I, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, and I was, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And, th. And, th. th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th theean, th toed, thean, thean, th thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, the. the. th to start from the bottom of showbiz again which made me feel Asian so right there I had like five different racial experiences in the course of like 10 minutes all right and so like what is race? I'm gonna chalk this up to the COVID. Whatever man I'm just saying race is fluid man. I feel you there Ronnie. All right that's it for the headlines don't go away because when we come back we're gonna tell you how to get to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the th r r r r re the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their their their their their their their their their. their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm toeck. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. for the headlines. Don't go away because when we come back, we're going to tell you how to get rich. You don't want to miss it.

Welcome back to the Daily Show. Let's talk about Congress. It's the number one tourist destination for people trying to hang Mike Pants. Now, you may not know this, but most members of Congress are forced to scrape by on a measly $200,000 a year salary, which when you think about it is barely enough to afford a good prostitutes. So naturally, they need to supplement their income by investing in the stock market. It's a natural thing. But if you can believe it, there's now a new movement in Congress to stop members from trading stocks altogether. It's rare these days for this divided Congress to stop members from trading stock school together. It's rare these days for this divided Congress to agree on absolutely anything,

but there may be one issue. It has the likes of Alexandria Ocaseo-Cortez and Kevin McCarthy on the same side. They're both among members of Congress pushing for new restrictions on how lawmakers trade stocks. Democratic Senator John Ossoff just released a bill tonight that would force lawmakers to put their assets into a blind trust or pay a fine of their entire salary. GOP Senator Josh Hawley is working on a version two, and in the House there's already a bipartisan bill called the Trust in Congress Act. This comes only a few weeks after House Speaker Nancy Pelosi doubled down on members

right to invest in the stock market. There's members of Congress and their spouses be banned from trading individual stocks while serving in Congress. No, I don't know to this second one. This is a free market in people. We are a free market economy that should be able to participate in that. Okay, well, first of all, I can't believe there's an issue that AOC and Kevin McCarthy agree on. Those people don't agree on anything, except that those kids on euphoria are way too

horny. Don't you guys have a homeworker? Pretty sure you can't put cocaine on a college application. And by the way, this bill is quite a move for a new senator like John Ossoff. Think about it, the guy just got to the Senate and he's already coming after the wallets of his co-workers. It's like showing up to prison on your first day and being like, hey, Warren, I think these guys are using spoons to dig something.

But the question still is why do so many representatives from political spectrum want to ban Congress from trading stocks. is Nancy Pelosi against that? Well let's find out in another installment of if you don't know now you know. The first thing to know is that historically Congress has had no restrictions when it comes to trading stocks. For most of American history, insider trading laws that affected CEOs didn't apply to members of Congress. So, if Thomas Edison testified behind closed doors, senators could just call up their broker going, dump all my shares and candles, that shit's over, I tell you. You see, they could use all of this advanced secret knowledge to make money for themselves, and it was illegal for everyone else to do it, but for some reason, Congress could.

I mean, it may have something to do with the fact that they were making the laws. Who knows? So it's no surprise that members of Congress have been really good at timing the portfolios of members of Congress and find they systematically outperform the stock market. A study of data from the 1990s showed Senators' trades outperform the market by 12% per year. That crushes investment guru Warren Buffett, who only managed to beat the market by 2.5 percent that decade. The 2008 financial crisis turned out to be a free-for-off for insider trading on Capitol Hill. According to a Washington Post expose, 35 members cashed out on information they received for meetings with Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson and others. One of those attending was Alabama Representative Spencer Backus.

While Congressman Backus was publicly trying to keep the economy from cratering, he was privately betting that it would, buying option funds that would go up in value if the market went down. He would make a variety of trades and profit at a time when most Americans were losing their shirts. Now look, I know seeing politicians profit off of an economic meltdown might make you angry, but don't forget they suffered too. Do you have any idea how hard it is to pretend to be sad when you're making bank?

They have to give speeches of fighting the urge to do the duggy live on camera. And obviously something fishy is going on when members of Congress are doing better in the stock market than Warren Buffett. I mean it definitely makes those fundraising emails even more annoying. I need $5 by midnight. Bitch, go talk to your e-trade. What are you talking to me for? I mean, I don't know, maybe I'm just jealous. Maybe I'm just jealous,

because members of Congress, they get all the coolest secrets, you know? Which stocks to buy who the CIA is killing? Where they're keeping that our producer Shelley is pregnant and she's going to surprise her husband on Valentine's Day. Boring! But when people found out about congressmen making money off of the financial crash, there was a big enough outcry that Congress was finally shamed into regulating themselves.

They passed the Stock Act, which banned members of Congress from trading stocks based on private information and forced them to publicly disclose all their trades within 45 days. But it turns out that legislation is like most members of Congress before bed, completely toothless. It is certainly illegal for members of Congress to partake in insider trading. Proving that is very difficult. If you want an elm on insider trading. Proving that is very difficult. If you want to nail them on insider trading, good luck.

You could essentially say, listen, I was reasonably told by my broker I should sell, or I heard similar stuff from a third party. DOJ has yet to successfully convict an elected member of Congress based on this law. Even if the law is followed, it barely has any teeth. Nearly 50 lawmakers, both Republicans and Democrats, and nearly 200 of their staffers,

have repeatedly violated the Stock Act with almost no consequences. You can make tens of millions of dollars with privilege information. And what's the penalty for failing to report these purchases? It's a joke. It's as low as $200. Whoa, $200 is the penalty for failing to report these purchases? It's a joke. It's as low as $200. Whoa, $200 is the penalty? I mean, look, I'm no math expert, but if I have to pay a $200 fine to make a trade that earns me millions of dollars, I feel like I'm coming out ahead. Like I'm making $1,000 in profit at least, right? $200 is not a penalty, people. That's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the that's the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, is the penalty, is the penalty, is the penalty, is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty is the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the penalty, the the the the the the thiiiolate that's that's that's th making a thousand dollars in profit at least, right?

$200 is not a penalty people. That's the chip you throw to the dealer after you win the poker tournament. Hell, you lose $200 just carrying the million to the bank. So it turns out that the Stock Act is just another one of those laws that no one enforces, you know like jaywalking or pushing all the buttons in an elevator. And don't forget, it's really hard to prove insider trading. You can just say you weren't even paying attention during that private briefing that you got, which as a member of Congress is actually a very believable alibi. So the Stock Act really did nothing to stop insider trading. Like, remember how those congressmen sold those stocks before the crash in 2008? Well, the same thing happened again a couple of years ago before COVID hit.

Yeah, multiple senators dumped their stocks after intelligence officials told them in a private briefing that all those coughing people in China were about to tank the world economy. And still, no one got punished. Which is why, even after the Stock Act, members of Congress continue to do so well that some of them have their own financial groupies, and no one has more than Nancy Pelosi. Some Tick-Tockers are getting stock market ideas by tracking members of Congress, and one of their favorites is House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. Nancy Pelosi just purchased millions of dollars in call options.

You've got to see this. Shout out to Nancy Pelosi, the stock market's biggest whale. Apparently she's decided to go very heavy in tech stock, so I'm going to show you guys which one she bought. The Queen of Investing just spent $300,000 on this one stock. So I think I'll be picking up a couple shares on Monday. This talk's about to go crazy because Nancy Pelosi bought it. Yeah, that's right. Nancy Pelosi is a star on Tick Tock.

And she didn't need to steal any black people's dance moves to do it. That's amazing. In fact, I almost respect Pelosi's hustle. She's 81 years old. Most of her friends are probably playing the nickel slots right now, but she knows that it doesn't matter if it's casinos or Wall Street. The house always wins, baby. Now, has Pelosi been so successful because of inside information? There's no way to know. But what's clear is that just being a member of Congress means that you'll probably know about the bad stuff that will crash a stock

before the rest of us. Yeah, whether it's a housing bubble or Elon Musk hosting S&L. And until members of Congress are banned from trading stocks, Congress will keep having an edge over regular people. And it'll all be completely legal or at the very least so unenforceable that it's legal by default. What you've got to admit is such a smooth way to do corruption. In fact, it's such a smooth way that leaders in other parts of the world are starting

to take notice. Gentlemen, welcome to today's lesson. Say that your people have given you the sacred trust of political office. How do you use that trust to get rich? I will pass laws that help those corporations in exchange for money. No, that is corruption. What you do is you buy the stock in the company and then you pass the law. But that is also corruption. No, that is the free market.

Say it with me, free market. Say it with me, free market. Free market. Say it with a feeling, free market. Free market. Put it in your bonds, free market. Free market. Good. In America, if you say the word free market, you can do anything.

It is like their witchcraft. But teacher, what if I get caught trading on my inside knowledge? Then you pay the penalty. But as the lawmaker, you get to decide the penalty. Oh, I'll pay $200? That is insultingly low. Good job! Yeah!

Yeah, yeah. Hurry, students, you know what to do? I will want the people. I'll save the children. I will buy stocks in unflotting. You have passed the test. You have passed the test. It's just a test.

There's no test. There's no time. Oh no, there is. No, faster. All right, when we come back, I'll be talking to the hilarious Rick Glassman about a show that combines autism and comedy. What? Stay tuned.

Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight is comedian and actor Rick Glassman. He's here to talk about his new series that follows a trio of roommates on the autism spectrum as they navigate life, work, and pursuing love. Oh man, Rick Glassman, welcome to the Daily Show. Thanks for having me. This is a really fun show. When people tell you about a show and the th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th is is is is is is th is th is is is is th is th is is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to thi toeeeeeeeeeeeee toeeee toeee toe thi thi thi thi thi thi thiman, welcome to the Daily Show. Thanks for having me. This is a really fun show. When people tell you about a show and they go,

this show is going to be about these people, you immediately think a few things. It doesn't matter who the people are. So they go like, this is going to be a show about African. This is going to be a show about European you don't mean this is going to be a show about autism you go like oh what does that mean and then you watch the show and you go like the people in the show just happen to be dealing with autism it's a show it's a story incidentally I thought our show was going to be a black show until it came out and it's funny that you bring that up as an found out it was like a superpower, I was so excited.

All these obstacles that had in my life that were unrelated, patterns kind of started showing themselves, and it was like, oh my god, this makes so much sense. And I was reading up on it, and I found all these tools that I never developed and I was so excited. And as I began to tell my friends, some people would be like, yeah, that makes sense. And some people were to tell me, that's not what autism is. And I got in a really bad depression

for a little over a year, because this identity that I wanted to take on, I didn't understand how to explain. that's fascinating. Does that make sense? Yeah figuring stuff out. Incidentally, this is my first doing this, a late-night show and an interview and when I booked the show I was so nervous about this moment because I didn't want to be obligated to be a spokesperson about a thing that I was still learning about myself. Oh man that's deep. And thank you. That's really deep. No for real. But then I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's a that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th real, but then I do the show and I had one autistic friend before the show.

Okay. I do the show and and there's a quote that I love that I loved that I loved. Tho's a quote. It's Dr. Stephen Shory said if you met one person with autism, it means you met one person with autism. I love that too, because it made me to to try and to explain who I to to to just to just to just to just their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to just just just just just just just just just just just to just to just to just to just to just to just to just to just their tho their to just to just to just their their their their their their their their their their their their. I their their their. I their their their their their their. I I I I I I I their. I I I I I I I. their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. toeeateateateatea. toea. toea. toea. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. diagnosis, it did two things for me. Internally it allowed me to better communicate and teach people how to communicate with me. I would often say, listen if you think I'm weird just tell me I'm not going to pick up on it. You know just if I'm being annoying give me the benefit of the doubt and just say Rick, slow down. But did anyone do that? Oh yeah, that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Did thi. Did thi. Did thi. Did thi. Did thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Did thi. Did thi. tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. to th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeeeeeeeeeeeea. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. toeea. toea. theea. the safe, so safe that they don't even care. Oh, yeah, he told me about this, it's fine. That's really interesting. I wonder if it's because, in a way, being vulnerable with a person

makes them comfortable being vulnerable back with you. So if you feel like somebody's being, quote unquote, weird, it's hard to say that because you don't know how you feel, you don't know how you feel, you don't want to hurt the person, you don't want to say the thing. There is a vulnerability in coming with telling somebody how you feel about how they're making you feel. And so if you put yourself in the position where you go like, hey, I'm actually the person that has an issue, they then go like, oh, they have other issues. And then they just they the they they they they they, I they, I they, I they, I they, I the, I the, I the, I tho, I tho, I thee, I', I', I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, that, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, tho, and, and, and, tho, and, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thr, and, tho, and, and, and, tho, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, have a problem with me, isn't the thing I'm doing.

I mean, if I'm punching you, maybe. But it's the one little thing of the lack of connection, it's the communication, and people don't want to say, why are you doing that? They're rather just assume that, like, oh, okay. Well, we're seeing different characters, you're seeing different obstacles in life. And that's what I love about the show. But most importantly, can I say this?

It's funny and it's heartwarming. People are telling a story about people who happen the neurodiverse characters are played by neurodiverse actors. Also there was one actor who has autism that played a neurotypical person. I'm meeting most of these people in the character they're playing. And that's, they're autism. And then cut, and I meet a completely different person. And it was just so, that's why I love that quote you meet one person. I mean, for every person I met on set, I met two people with autism, their representation of it, and then who they really were.

Damn. And it made me feel so good. And also, this just happened a few days ago, and I almost want to check him, but it's fine, we won't say names. But there's a friend of mine who's th story. Yeah, go, go, go, go. Go ahead, go. If we don't have time, I'll just cut it out. He'll leave it. A friend of mine, I was dating and I went to her hometown, this was nine years ago, pre-diagnosis, and there were a couple of obstacles with the mom that I didn't know were happening. All right. A small example is I only had a few things to do laundry and I was going to do them, but that's a waste.

She said, I'll do all the laundry. I'm like, I'd like to do my own. Please, let me. She was going to wash it with these purple sheets that I knew had never been washed before and I'm like, well, that shirt, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I was, I was, she...... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th to. th to. to. to. to. to. to. toed, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, she said, I'll. to. things kept happening. Then there was a moment where my my girlfriend at the time was at her neighbor so it was just a mom and me and making hot dogs and great and I took a look and the hot dogs were purple togs which was odd. So I didn't want to ask because I've had a lot of purple drama already. Right. So I look in the garbage.

See just had these expired or what brand? it's a purple hot dog, a fun hot dog. You don't know about it. No, you gotta ask. And the rappers were under some garbage, which made me feel like, is she hiding the, she hiding the rappleness of the, yeah. So now, it expired four years ago. The hot dogs expired four years ago, and they're hidden. So now, what do I do thoa, I don't know, what tho, what thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, is thu, is thu, is thu, is thu, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th, is th thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi..... thi. thi. thi. thi. thii. thiiii. thi. thii. thi. thi. thi, is thi, is I'm recognizing something is a little out from that day. A little, yeah. So I just said, hey, you know what, I'm not going to eat the hot dog. I don't need to give the details.

I'm an adult, I get it. I could go around it, but she said why. So I told her the hot dogs. And she said, well, theyrowns, th's, th's, the hot, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I the the hot, I the hot, I the hot, I the hot. the the hot, I the hot, I the hot, I the hot. the hot. the hot. the hot. the hot. the hot. the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the, I the the the the the to. to. the told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. told. to she's like, my daughter's going to marry this guy that's nuts about this stuff. Three days ago, my friend calls me that her mom called her crying, a mom on episode seven of Rick's show. Right. I get it. I get it. And this idea of like, it lets people in on, oh, if you just realize that these people are not, not worse, but just, but just, but just, but just, but just, they they they they they they th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. And, thi. And, thr. And, thri. And, thri. And, thriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thri. thri. thri. thrines, the hot dogs are a different color. Right. And it took watching a show of me playing someone I'm not for her to see who I was nine years ago.

And it just like let something loose that, and this is maybe a selfish or a corny thing to say, but like I'm part of this show that isn't just making people the reality of some of this. It happened to me and like you needed me to do this show as we see it on Amazon Prime streaming now. So I had you understand that I didn't want to eat a purple hot dog? Ah, Rick, this has been fun, man. Thanks for making my day.

And congratulations on the show. Thank you very much, man. Good to have you. Cheers. All episodes of As We See It are streaming right now on Amazon Prime Video. We're going to take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. Thank you, man. That was really a lot of fun. You made my day. Well, that's our show for tonight. But before we go, don't forget to the Daily Show's Merit collection,

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