The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Joe Biden Cruises Ahead in Polls & Trump's Fearmongering 911 Ad | Hannibal Buress

Episode Date: July 15, 2020

Joe Biden leads President Trump in polls, Dulce Sloan highlights the importance of taking the census, and Hannibal Buress discusses his stand-up special "Miami Nights." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at, that's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News,

listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everybody, welcome to the daily social distancing show. I'm Trevor Noah. It is Tuesday. And as you can see, although many people around the country are going back to their offices we are still not allowed to go back to the studio because I rented it out on Airbnb to some dude from Norway and now he refuses to leave. To better dry him halver tax call du ha anyway on tonight's show coronavirus is extending its visa Jeffrey Epstein's alleged

accomplice has been foiled and President Trump might be finding a new job. So let's do this, people. Welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. From Trevor's Couch in New York City to your couch somewhere in the world. This is the Daily Social Distancing Show with Trevor and Owen. Ears Edition. Let's begin with California, home to the most gorgeous Emmy voters in the nation. Soup, y'all. One month ago, the Golden State announced that it was doing a good enough job fighting the

coronavirus that restaurants, stores, and other businesses could welcome customers back in. The bad news is, one of those customers was coronavirus. California, the home state of nearly one out of eight Americans is making an abrupt U-turn to try to roll back a surge in coronavirus infections. California has recorded nearly 110,000 new cases in the last 14 days, including another 8,000 yesterday. COVID-19 is not going away anytime soon. Just over one month after reopening several sectors of California's economy, Governor Gavin Newsom is reversing course. Yesterday he announced gyms, churches, and hair salons would be among those forced

to close in 29 California counties, while bars, indoor restaurants, and movie theaters will close across the entire state. And the state's too big as school system said today, they will only do distance learning in the fall. That's right. It might have taken a while for California to blow up again, probably because Corona was stuck in traffic on the 405. But now, they become the biggest state to roll back their reopening.

Because you see, even though many of us have become bored of the coronavirus, the coronavirus is not bored of us. Coronavirus doesn't care about the new cycle. People are like, wow, did you hear about Will and Jada? And Corona's like, the only thing I'm trying to get entangled with is your lungs. And what's happening in California is a preview. the the the the the the the the the thiiiiol. th. their. their. their. th. thi. their. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their, th. thirty. thoom. thoom. thi. thin, thoom. th. I's, th, th, th, th. I is not th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's th. I's th. I's is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I's th. I's th. I's thin, tho tho tho tho th th th tho tho th thorough thorough tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho is a preview of what the next year is going to look like for a lot of places. Gradually reopening, then shutting down when things get dangerous. This whole thing without a vaccine, without tracing, without enough testing, it's like trying

to have sex in your parents' house. You know, things are ramping up. thin' to their th everything down till it's safe again, pull your pants back up. And California's unopening is also a good reminder that coronavirus is playing the long game, people. With numbers skyrocketing around the country, some of those very cocky statements that people were making just a few weeks ago haven't aged so well. Florida got it right. And guess what? Now it's time for

all the states to follow their lead. Governor DeSantis now looks like a genius. Ron DeSantis of Florida, the governor is doing a fantastic job in Florida. Governor, those dire predictions have not come true. They look to Florida and they look at Texas that have reopened and it hasn't led to a massive second wave. In a very real sense Florida is leading the way the way the way the way the way the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. thi. thi. to to to to thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. Governor. Governor. Governor. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. It's. It's. It's. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the thi. thi. th Florida and they look at Texas that have reopened and it hasn't led to a massive second wave. In a very real sense, Florida is leading the way. It's been two months and Florida has figured out how to manage this pretty effectively. Governor DeSantis, who's doing a phenomenal job. The state of Florida, which happens to be my great home state.

I can't get to Florida or Texas fast enough, and I think there's plenty of people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people the exact same way. How much longer are you going to keep me out of your state? I would like to go visit. When am I allowed back in? We're glad you're opening up. We're ready to have some sunshine and get out of the house. It's great to be in Florida, and I'm going to be back here in a week. I've always wanted to move to Texasomo and Governor Murphy, what not to do because they did the opposite of what you guys did. Texas, Florida gave us clues. Take the success clues. The successes of Florida, Texas, the failures of New York, New Jersey.

We've got to get the whole country open like Tennessee and Texas and Florida. He's got it in great shape. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. Texas. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to do to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tho. tho. tho. the. the. the. the. tho. tho. the. to to to to to to to to to to tho. to to tho. the thto get the whole country open like Tennessee and Texas and Florida. He's got it in great shape, Texas. Florida's doing very well. How did you do it because we need to learn as we reopen? Great job down there. Keep up the great work. You did a great job. You saved a lot of lives and there's a lot of lives and there's a lot to learn from your success. Yeah, maybe not a great idea to take to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their to their their their their their the in the middle of a pandemic. And I know there's a lot of politics tied up with who's rooting for which states and policies to succeed,

but people, we need to understand, coronavirus has no politics. It doesn't give a shit what state you live in. Corona virus is the most bipartisan thing to happen to America since hating Jussie Smollett. And celebrating too soon and letting its guard down could basically guarantee that America is not going to beat this virus. But let's move on to one of the latest developments in one of the biggest true crime stories of the decade.

It involves Jeffrey Epstein and his right-hand woman. Breaking news here, Galle Maxwell, the longtime friend and confidon of Jeffrey Upstine, has been denied bail. After pleading not guilty in court today, she's charged with helping Epstein sexually abused underage girls. Her attorneys had wanted her release from jail due to coronavirus. Prosecutors, however, argued that she's a flight risk, saying that she ran from officers when she was arrested.

During a search of the house where she was hiding, FBI agents reported finding a cell phone that was wrapped in tinfoil in an effort to evade detection. She has denied any wrongdoing. Wow. Elaine Maxwell was so paranoid that she wrapped her cell phone in tinfoil. And I'm not going to lie, she's really a confusing woman. Because on the one hand, she allegedly ran Epstein's pedophile ring, but she also thinks wrapping her phone in

tinfoil makes it untraceable? How is Gileen a criminal mastermind and everyone's grandma at the same time? I mean, if you're getting chased by the FBI, just get rid of your phone? How obsessed are you with your phone that you're like, I should ditch my phone so the FBI can't track me? Ooh, but then how will I check my mentions? But this arrest is big news, because remember, other than Jeffrey Epstein, Gileen Maxwell is the only person who potentially knows all the other men who are involved in this pedophile sex ring.

And one of the big questions now is whether she's going to implicate anyone else like Prince Andrew, which would be a major development. Because that story would absolutely dominate the British press, unless of course Megan Markle bought the wrong kind of avocado that week or something. But other than that, it would be the top story. Meanwhile, in international news, there's a big story developing out of Hong Kong. For more than 20 years, the former British colony has operated independently from the authoritarian government in mainland China. But now, China seems to be cracking down.

China is now lashing out at Western nations for taking action against its new national security law for Hong Kong. Beijing passed that new anti-sedition and subversion law that carries penalties like life in prison and secret trials on the mainland and people are worried that this means the end of Hong Kong as we know it. After Beijing imposed that national security law in Hong Kong, China now says 600,000 people may have broken it. Over the weekend, all those people voted in a primary election

organized by the city's pro-democracy opposition. The Chinese government calls the election illegal. Hong Kong officials say they are investigating. Yeah, basically what happened here is China promised that they would only use this new subversion law sparingly. And now a couple of weeks later, they're like, we're coming after 600,000 people who broke this new subversion law sparingly. And now a couple of weeks later, they're like, we're coming off to 600,000 people who broke this law. 600,000 people.

I mean, I guess when you're China, 600,000 people is sparingly. But still, and I think this is a terrible, terrible thing. You know, it is so undemocratic to arrest people who are voting against you. What you're supposed to do is just reduce the number of polling locations and tell voters that their IDs are incorrect because the picture has a black face. That's democracy. This is why it's frustrating when people in America don't use their right to vote.

In any country, really, right? Because in many countries around the world, you have to risk your freedom for that right. That's why I vote in everything I can. American Idol, Twitter polls, student council elections, everything. Yeah, I don't go to that school anymore, but if they can't get pizza Fridays, then none of us are free. Moving on, let's check in with Tucker Carlson, Fox News, primetime star and mom haircut model. Last week, Carlson's head writer was busted for having a secret account where he posted the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most th., th. th. th. th. th. th., th. th. th. th. th. th. thioleolomea, toeateathea, th. th. I, toe. I, tool. I, tool. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, th. I, th....... I, th.............. I, to, to, to, toe..... You, toe. I, toe.. You, toe.. We have, toe. toe.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e..e................... And, t. head writer was busted for having a secret account

where he posted the most racist, homophobic, and misogynistic comments online. So Fox News got rid of the guy. But it appears Tucker Carlson might have some mixed feelings about how it all went down. Fox News host Tucker Carlson is publicly addressing the revelation his former head writer posted racist and sexist material. We should also point out to the ghouls now beating their chests and triumph of the destruction of a young man, that self-righteousness also has its costs. We are all human. When we pretend we are holy, we are lying. When we pose as blameless in order to hurt other people, we are committing the gravest sin of all, and we will be punished for it... th. th. th. th. thuuuu th. th. th. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to thi. to to the th. the the the the the th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the thi. the the the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thee toe the toe the the the the the the the the toe the toe toe toeuu. toeu. toe order to hurt other people. We are committing the gravest sin of all and we will be punished for it. There's no question.

At the end of his show Carlson announced he is heading on a long-planned vacation. Well, we're out of time. We're going to spend the next four days trout fishing. Long planned. This is one of those years where if you don't get it in now, you're probably not going to. Okay, first off, I love how every time Tucker Carlson gets in trouble, he takes a planned vacation in the middle of the week. The guy's packing his suitcase in the studio like, I've been planning this thing for a long time. I love starting a vacation midweek, because the trout never expects you to show up on a Tuesday. Look, man, if you feel the need to say your trip was long planned, then you know it definitely

wasn't, because that's never a detail someone shares when they talk about a vacation. The trip was long planned. That's not something anyone says. This trip was planned as much as anyone plans to shit their pants a little bit when they fought while waiting in the line at Whole Foods, hypothetically speaking. And another thing, why is Tucker Carlson blaming the public for his head rights are getting fired? Right? Fox News chose to fire this person, not the public. And if Fox News fires you for being racist, then you're racist racist.

The most confusing part of this story for me is why this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this th. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, hypothetically, hypothetically, hypothetically, hypothetically, hypothetically, hypothetically, hypothetically, thi, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothet, hypothetically, hypothic. Hipipipipipipipe, hypothi. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. H. I. I, thi, thi. I. I, thi. I, thi. I, t. I'm, t. I'm, t. I'm, t. I'm, tipe. I'm, tipe. I'ma, tipe. I'ma, tipe. I'ma, tipe. I racist, then you're racist racist racist. The most confusing part of this story for me is why this guy made these racist posts in the first place. I mean, you already write for Tucker Carlson. Imagine writing racist shit for Tucker Carlson's show all day. And then you go home and write more racist shit in your time off. That would be like me relaxing before bed by doing a second daily show. And that's why Trump is racist. thiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and thi, thi, thi, and thi, and th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. And, th. And, thi. And, th. And, th. And, th. thi. th. thi. th. th. thi. th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And second daily show. And that's why Trump is racist. All right, goodnight world. And finally, some news out of the White House.

With America facing the worst unemployment since the Great Depression, the Trump administration has been looking for some way to help people get back on their feet. And what they've come up with is this. Ravanka Trump, holding a virtual roundtable with Apple CEO Tim Cook and IBM Executive Chair Ginny Romody to launch a new ad campaign to help those out of work. It is called Find Something New. Right skills. Find an apprenticeship. I found a medical course online.

I'm not a consultant in the tech space. You have more options than you think. You will find something. You will find something new. You know what? I don't hate this. Giving people training so that they can find new jobs is a great idea.

It's just surprising that it came from someone who's never had to find a job in the first place. But you've got to admit. It's a little little unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate unfortunate that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the Trump administration is working against itself. Because yeah, you say you're trying to help people find a new job, but your coronavirus response is also shutting down all of the jobs. And to be honest, I'm not sure many ordinary people who are looking for work are going to get much out of these ads.

I mean, there might be one person who could benefit from this program, you know, but those ads would need to be a little more targeted. Are you dissatisfied with your job? Work used to be fun. But now Corona has screwed up everything, and no one wants to hang out with you at work. Well, maybe it's time you find something new. You could be a baseball player, or a a cold minor or even a cool cowboy. Yeha. So if you're Donald Trump and don't want to be president anymore, find something new. I want to be a movie maker. Sure, why not? You could be anything. I want to be a cheerleader. Uh, maybe something else. But if you don't want to be president anymore, it's never too late to find a job more suited

for your skill set. Find something new. Anything. Think about it, Donald. You look good in that truck. When we come back, we'll look at how the 2020 election is shaping up. Yeah, that's right. There's an election in November, remember that?

I keep forgetting it too, because we'll all be dead. All right, we'll be right back. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our the the the treasures treasures the treasures the treasures treasures the to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.

I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. We are now just four months away from Election Day. So let's check in on the state of the presidential race with our continuing coverage of Vote Gasm 2020. If there's one thing everyone agrees on, the 2020 election will be a referendum on Donald Jiffie-Loo-Trump. If there's one thing everyone agrees on, the 2020 election will be a referendum on Donald Jiffy-Lube Trump. If enough people love him, he'll get four more years. And if not, they'll pass the keys to Joe Biden.

And so far, things are not looking good for President Bleachbard. In poll after poll, presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden is beating President Trump nationally by up to 14 percentage points. There's some bad news for the president in new polls in key states across the nation. Joe Biden is now leading Donald Trump by six points in Florida, is tied in Arizona and competitive in Texas. Biden is actually ahead in Texas by five in a new Dallas Morning News poll. Joe Biden is waiting into Texas with his first general election TV ad of this campaign.

I'm thinking of all of you today across Texas. I know the rise in case numbers is causing fear and apprehension. This virus is tough, but Texas is tougher. We're all in this together. We'll fight this together. And together, we'll emerge from this stronger than we were before we begin. Okay, I'm not gonna lie. That's a pretty great ad. And you know it was running in Texas because it was the first time Biden didn't mention that he has a black friend. But it isn't saying how

comforting it is during this pandemic to simply have a candidate talk to us in a calming tone. You know, instead of yelling at the reporter that he hopes she gets crushed under a Confederate statue or something. I hope it falls on your head, smash boom bang, out of nowhere. And the mere fact that Biden is running ads in Texas, should tell you how much trouble Trump is in right now. Because this means that Biden has a shot of turning Texas Democrat. Texas! Imagine that. The last time something so red turned so blue was a very private incident that happened when I was 13 and home alone right after we first got into it. That is a story between me and my doctor. We should probably cut

that out. Now, it's no big surprise that Trump is struggling in the polls. There's actually an old saying in American politics that letting a deadly pandemic kill everyone is bad for you. Which is why some of Trump's allies are saying voters should just ignore all the disastrous stuff that's happening now and remember the good times. With Senate GOP candidates not mentioning Trump in ads and not wanting to hug him tightly, concerned about turning off more moderate voters, one GOP senator saying Trump will win because people will just sort of forget the last six months. The stakes are very high in this election, but you know why I know we're going to win? Because people remember how good their lives were in February.

Remember February? You want us to remember February? I don't remember anything about my life pre-corona. Anything. Like, I keep getting these emails that say, we miss you, Daddy. I just delete them. I'm pretty sure it's a fishing scam. I don't remember having a family. Seriously, nobody would make this kind of argument in any other job.

Can't be like, thiii. to thu we did in February. She pooped twice. But if the make America February against strategy seems like a long shot, there is one other thing Trump is trying. Instead of having the election be about whether or not people like him, he can try to make it a referendum a a a a a a a a a referendum a referendum a referendum a referendum a referendum a referendum a the the the the the the to make a to make a to make a to make a to make a to make a to make a to make a to make a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to bea. to bea. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeckh. toeckh. toeckh. toe. toe. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to.. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. toe. toe. toe. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. toeck. he can try to make it a referendum on Joe Biden. And to do that, he needs to convince people that America under Biden will be even worse than it is now, which is what explains this new ad from the Trump campaign.

You have reached the 911 police emergency line. Due to defunding of the police department, we're sorry, but no one is here to take your call. If you're calling to report a rape, please press 1. To report a murder, press 2. To report a home invasion, press 3. For all other crimes, leave your name and number, and someone will get back to you. Our estimated wait time is currently 5 days. Goodbye. Okay, I'm not going to lie.

That's a pretty good ad. Because it makes it seem like Joe Biden's America is going to be a nightmare. 911 won't pick up your calls. That must be terrifying, especially to all the Cairns who are calling cops on black people. Five days. I can't wait five days. I demand to speak to a manager now! So, clearly Trump is going all in on fear, but Democrats don't seem to be too scared. In fact, some Democrats are so confident right now

that they're already predicting a tsunami-sized win in November, with party leaders increasingly convinced that they'll not only win the White House, they'll win the Senate and the House too. And if that sounds a little too confident, well, maybe it's because you remember what happened 200 years ago in the 2016 election. It looks, according to the polls, like Hillary Clinton is going to win easily. A lot of people have no idea

that Trump is headed for a historic defeat. That's a guy who knows he's going to lose. I'm trying to be a little risk-verseverse in in in in in to to to lose in to lose in to lose. I'm trying to be a little risk averse in my predictions but I think that she's going to have a very good night. So the technical term for that if she's anywhere near your prediction would be blowout. I'm glad I give a lands I don't know. You call that a landslide. I would say a landslide. A man who says Hillary Clinton has a 100% chance of winning. So that means that no scenario that we could lay out to get Donald Trump to 270 electoral votes is something he would buy. It's the Easter Bunny, okay?

It doesn't exist. This guy, in my view, is not going to be elected president. And he never was. When we come back, Dorsay Sloan catches us up on the census, and then we will talk to Hannibal Burris. Stay soon. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.

But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News, listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. You know with everything going on this year, it is easy to forget that 2020 is also a census year, which is when the U.S. Government asks you all the questions they should. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th................. th.. th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the the thi. the the the the the th. the the th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. th. th. the th. th. th. to forget that 2020 is also a census year, which is when the US government asks you all the questions

they should know already from spying on our phones. But it turns out, not everyone is interested in an accurate count. Our very own Dulce-Sloan has more in another episode of Count on it. The census is here. And you might think who gives a shit. The revolution is here too. But as I learned in my last installment, the census has a lot to do with how your community is treated. Participating in the census allows your community its fair share of over $800 billion in support for education, health, school lunches, highways.

If you don't respond, your community is going to get cheap. But something doesn't add up. If an accurate count is as important as Bob says it is, you'd think the states would want to make sure they get their count right. But half the states don't spend any money on the census, zero dollars. That's the same amount of money I spent on Wi-Fi since I moved next to a Starbucks. To find out why, I called someone doing census outreach in Georgia. Ginnie! Gdien?

Don't say! I need your help, friend. So some states don't want to be counted accurately? Explain to me what's going on here. So unfortunately not, not the same the same the same the same th th. the same th. th. they they they they they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they. I'm they. I'm they. That's they. That's they. That's they. That's they. That's they. That's they. I they. I they. I they. I they they they they they they they they they they they they, they they they, they, they, they they, they, they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. I to to the. I to to the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm they're they're they're they're they're they're don't want to be counted accurately explain to me what's going on here. So unfortunately not all states have invested in the census. You have some states like California that have invested over a hundred and eighty million dollars which is about four dollars per person but then on the other hand you have the state of Texas which is investing zero dollars in making sure they get a complete count. They're saying that there are places that are not trying to get the census right. Why?

When the census is done, those numbers are used in a process called redistricting, which is a fancy word for redrawing voting districts all the way down to the school board level. If you're able to keep a certain type of person out of the census, then you also keep them out of the redistricting process, which redraws the maps and distributes political power. Now when you say certain people, do you mean us? You know who I'm talking about. Anytime a map is unfairly drawn, the only way we have to fight it is on the basis of racial gerrymandering. And if you don't count all the races, if you don't have the complete

demographic picture, then we don't have anything to stand on to fight unfair maps. A suppressed census leads to many of the problems we are seeing today, like disparities in health care, education, and representation. Okay, this all sounds like it makes sense, but it also sounds like a conspiracy theory for a very good movie. Am I being paranoid? I'm not being paranoid, right? You're not being paranoid, Dulce. And we have evidence to pack it up. If you remember, the Trump administration tried to add a citizenship question to the census.

That's the Supreme Court shut down. They were working with the guru of gerrymandering, Thomas Hoffeller. When he died, his daughter found his hard drive and on those hard drives there was a study out of Texas where he found that if you added a citizenship question to the census and would benefit the Republican Party and white voters. No conspiracy, data, straight facts. You got to work so hard to be so shady. There's one more thing that we should. If you don't complete the census and you don't answer the door,

the Census Bureau uses a process called imputation. If you are a black woman living in a place that is majority white, and you don't respond to the census, then they say, hey, this person might be a white guy. You're telling me, if I don't turn into census paperwork w w w the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and the census, and to the census, and the census, and to the census, then they say, hey, this person might be a white guy. You're telling me, if I don't turn in the census paperwork and don't fill it out online and then don't answer the door when they come to my house because you know that I'm not answering the door. I could be a white man in the eyes of the U.S. government? Could it be? Uh-uh. The only time I want to be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed be assumed the the to be assumed to be assumed to be assumed to be assumed the to be assumed to be assumed to be assumed the the the the the to be as the the the the the the the the the the the the the the only the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to be as soon. to be as soon. tome. tomo. tune. tomo. tune. tomo. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. to tomorrow. the the the tip want to be assumed to be white is when the cops show up. In the same way, when we talk about voter suppression, the same thing is true for census suppression. So wait, so I have to worry about police oppression, voter suppression, and census suppression too? There's too many actions.

That's what they want, they'll say. They want you to be overwhelmed so that you just throw your hands in the air and say forget it. But we can't do that. We have to fight back. To fight voter suppression, we've got to fight census suppression. And that's why my sister Stacey Abrams started two organizations that do just that. So when you say sister, sister you're being like sister or like sister sister we got the same mom and daddy your sister Stacey Abrams yeah oh then you know first hand how important it is to count people in the state of Georgia it was shady how

to get her they're doing all of this to discourage us but what we have to do is show them that we see them we see that you are leaving certain communities out and stripping away their political power and we can't let them win them them them them them them them them them them them them they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they to to to they to to they to they to to to to to they to they to they to they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they that we see them. We see that you are leaving certain communities out and stripping away their political power and we can't let them win. Because they wouldn't be doing all of this stuff if it wasn't important for us to take it. Yep. So please y'all take the census just to let all those shady manipulators know we fucking see you. Thank you so much, Dulce. And if you live in America, you have until the end of October to get your census forms in.

All right, when we come back, I'll be talking to the one and only Hannibal Burris, so don't go away. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.

I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. Earlier today, I spoke with comedian Hannibal Burris about his new stand-up special, which is currently streaming on YouTube. It's called Miami Nights. You ever think you were depressed, but you just really needed a haircut? And you got a haircut, like, what was I worried about? I'm fresh as f-fix? Lord, why else thou for a sake of me, God? Miami cop who arrested Hannibal Burrass, caught choking man after fireball business.

Hannibal Burris. Hanibal Burris, welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. How you doing, my dude? I'm good. What's up, man? How's it going? I'm good, but I just want to understand. Did you, did you create, is your background that you've chosen my studio that I can't be in right now?

Is that what you've done? Yeah, because I want to, I'd rather. I do that. This is, what, enough with the hoodies, man. For real, come on, man. Enough with the hoodies and do it, do the show in a bigger room in your house. You can't pull us doing it somewhere near us, we know. How are you, how are you doing? I want to know, I miss you, as a human being. I miss you as a friend.

I miss you as a fan. I, there was a period where, like, I felt like Hannibal Burris was everywhere, I was watching your stand up. And then, it was like a series of events, and then you'd like, you'd like, disa'niphue. It was like, thus, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha. th. th. th. th and I'm and like you like talking to a cop and then they're like Hannibal Burris is released and then Hannibal Burrace was gone and now you're back with a brand new special. Tell me a little bit about your life. Those are three years apart those two things. I was out I was making rap songs. I was uh, I was doing animated film. Just put a love of the game. Just kind of practicing magic magic. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th and th and thin hand thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thiabluris th and then thiablurist thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th and then th and then th and then th and then th and then th and then their their their th and then their th and then their their their th and then thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thia. thia. thia. thia. thia. thi. theea. I was doing birthday parties too,

just for the love of the game. Just kind of practicing magic, hanging out. It was a good time. Listen man, I have this backdrop, right? I'm tired of doing stuff in my crib, man. I drove, I left my house this morning and just drove around to act like I was going to a television set. You know what I was? I drove around and I like stopped and I went somewhere else and then I just tried to make it feel like and I had somebody act like I was driving onto a lot,

I had somebody act like a security guard at the front of my place and say, what are you here for? I'm here for the Daily Show. I had to, I'm just trying to create a world, man. Everything's gone. I'm trying to get it back. I remember your special was just supposed to be launched that South by Southwest. Yeah. And then, literally, just as South by South West was about a kick off, it th. got canceled. And then I was like what's going to happen to handle with special? And then you just put it out on YouTube for free?

I just, I wanted to put it out on YouTube just to see how it goes, man. The world is crumbling. So I try to do something different than I would have normally done because the whole world is different. Touring has changed. Life is in a different space. So I said, why not try something spontaneous that fits the current time? So that's why I decided to go with you too. A little bit. Who knows? I really enjoyed how you addressed everything. Like, I mean, it felt like a lot of the things you were addressing in the special have become more timely than ever before because you got arrested by a policeman for basically, I mean, not treating him the way he wanted to be treated is essentially what happened. And you tell the story, I mean, you tell it really

amazingly in the special. I don't even want to like try and butcher the joke or the story, but you make a joke about it, but when you were getting arrested by this cop in Miami, You talk about how you didn't want to get shot in the face and you know, you tell it in a light-hearted way. But was there a moment when you were when you really feel feared for your life in that thing or were you just were just so blazed that you were like, yeah man, I'm drunk and I'm having a good time? No, because he followed me into the bar after our initial interaction was over and so that was that was pretty jarred because it was it was pretty much done we had words and he said leave

and then I left and went into the bar and then he comes into the bar and like what are you doing in the bar? we're like what are you doing in the bar and then he says leave the bar and then he says leave the bar and you just ask me to the the bar and th so the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the that th is the to the the to to to to the to the the the the the the the they the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th is the th is th is th is the th is the th is th is th is th is they the they. te took took te te te te tea they. they. they. they they they they they they the leave the bar. And like, what do you mean to leave the bar? You just asked me to leave there. And I left there and came into the bar. And so you gotta leave it. And I'm like, whoa, this is different. And so I don't, I don't know how completely scared, but I was baffled in the moment just

because he kind of, he escalated the situation when he didn't have to. He could have stayed where he stayed, and I could have just went about my wife. And so that was the part of, like, well, this could get dicey because he's acting out of order. I want to talk to you about Hannibal Burst, the human being, though. Like, you've always been, especially for your fans. You've always been somebody who's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, this this this, a drunken night out and then I guess after

this incident you're like I'm quitting alcohol and I'm done. Why did you make that decision? Well I didn't quit right away. I had three crazy weeks and then I quit after that. After that though I really had to just look at my time drinking over the years and kind of really do a kind of an audit and really look at the whole thing and situations and things that's in and things that happened and embarrassing stuff. And it wasn't, it wasn't sustainable anymore. Yeah. It was really looking like, hmm, this is not a good,

this is not a good list right here. It's, it's, so I had to just really take it out. And, and after that, I kind of, my face slimmed down when I stopped drinking, it was, it was too much sugar. I was drinking James and Ginger else. I was looking at old pictures, I looked at old pages from 2015, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, thin, th, th is not thin, th is not the good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good, this, this was not good, this, the, this, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thi is not thi, thi-a, thi-a, thiolenen, thiaugh, thi was not thia, thia good is not thiiia' was not thia' was not thi Gingerail so my I was looking at old pictures I look at old pictures from 2015 2016 were like whoa you were drinking a lot you know what's weird for me is like when you say something that I thought that was your face because that's how I met you no but you go because when you meet someone you meet someone I don't like you thi to thee that the to thi thi the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi the thi they. thi thi they. thi. thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm that's the. I'm thi. I'm that's that's that's that's th. I that's th. I th. I that's th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I thi. I thi. I thi. I the thi. I I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. I'm the the the the to the the the someone, you meet someone. I don't, I don't like meet anyone and be like, you should look different.

I just meet people and I'm like, that's you. And so when I met you, I was like, that's you. And then I saw you like after all of this and I was like, man, Hannibal's had a tough time. His face is really slimmed down. of distress, but now I realize this is actually your healthy face and now I feel bad that I knew you with that face and I didn't say anything. And the thing is, I thought that was my face too. I'm like, because I, it was my face and I'm like, yo, this is my face. This is as good as it gets for head shape and eye color and the whole thing.

What are you, what are you doing now, I mean, I know, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thing. What are you what are you doing now? Are you I mean, I know like some comedians, you know, like Michael Chase trying to do comedy in like a parking lot where people are like spaced out and Dave Chappell's got like an outdoor comedy club and are you doing stand-up? Are you out? Are you is there anything you can do that's a semblance of normal? I want to do a drive-in tour of Miami Nights and I've been seeing a lot of drive-in events popping up lately. So it'd be dope to do that and have, you know, and DJ show some videos and do some shows like that. So I wanna do that next month. And that would be nice to put the special on a big screen.

And hang out in their car. I think the drive-in stuff is really popular because the people, you know, we lost a lot of control in our world and go to places, you put in all that and you got to, you know, get the temperature taken at places. So when people come to drive in, I still have my car right here and I have, you know, I'm in my, this is my car and we're able to enjoy something so I want to do a little tour and that'll be, that'll be fun to get it out like that. Well, you know what, man, I'm excited to have you back. I was waiting for a new special. I'm, everyone should guard and watch the special.

And I hope to see you soon in person, my friend. Michelle, peace, travel. Look off to yourself. All right, man. Thank you so much Hannibal for the weirdest interview we've done on this show. That's our show for tonight. But before we go, America is facing a nationwide poll worker shortage.

And because most poll workers are over 60 the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, th. I is too too too to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too. I. I. I. I. And, too. And, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe. And, toe. And, toe. And, toe, toe. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the th. And, the the th. th. the th. th. to to too too too too too too too too too too too toe. And, toe. And because most poll workers are over 60, and with COVID still in the air, they are understandably not showing up. But fewer poll workers means fewer polling stations open, and it means longer lines that not everyone can afford to stay and wait in, especially in communities of color. But the good news is, most poll working is paid,

and in some states, you can be as young as 16 to do it. So if you're interested and you have the time, this is your chance to save Granny, protect democracy and get some of their money too. So sign up at the link below to learn more. Until tomorrow, stay safe out there. And everyone who's going on a Tuesday vacation, have fun. of content and more. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.

When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts.