The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Lewis Black Takes on Summer Heat | Charlamagne tha God on Racist Anti-Kamala Rhetoric

Episode Date: September 6, 2024

In the latest Back in Black, Lewis Black unloads his frustration with the unbearable summer heat and the effects of climate change. Also, Charlamagne tha God gives his opinion of the right’s racist and sexist attacks on Kamala Harris and how this distracts from discussing real political issues. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart here, unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, The Weekly Show, we're gonna be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey, this is Roy Chang. The Daily Show is off this week, but don't worry. We put together some of our favorite moments from the show in case you miss them. We'll the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their the the. We'll the. We'll the. the. the. the, the. thea' the, the, the, th. the, th. th. th. th. the, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t t t t t the the the the the the the the the the the thea', the the thea, thea, te. te. week, but don't worry. We put together some of our favorite moments from the show in case you miss them. We'll be back with brand new shows on September 10th. Until then, enjoy today's episode.

Welcome back to the Daily Show. When a news story falls through a cracks, Lewis Black catches it for a segment we call Back in Black. We are officially in the dog days of summer, which means I can finally bust out my slip and slide. It used to belong to the kid next door, but it turns out a lot of kids' stuff. You can just walk up and take. But this summer it's so hot. It used to belong to the kid next door, but it turns out a lot of kids' stuff. You can't just walk up and take.

But this summer it's so hot, you can't even make it down the slide without your nuts sticking to the binghall. It's been one of the hottest summers on record across the U.S. A relentless heatwave smashing records in the Northeast. Monday was the hottest day ever reported on Earth. The previous record, which was set on Sunday only lasted 24 hours. It's hot, really, really hot. The hottest day ever recorded on Earth. Suck on that, dinosaurs! We can destroy the planet ourselves. We don't need an asteroid like you, pussies.

Yes, this summer the heat is kicking our ass more than usual. Last week it was so hot in New York that... And I can't believe it, that... and I can't believe it, the Earth, that, that, that, that, that, the Earth, that, that, the Earth, that, that, that, the Earth, that, the Earth, that, the Earth, that, that, that, the Earth, that, that, that, the Earth, that, that, that that that, the the that that that that that that that that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that. that. that, that. that. that, that. that. the that, that. the that, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, and the the is the the is theate is the theate is theate is theate is theate is the is the is the is the is the, th heat is kicking our ass more than usual. Last week it was so hot in New York that, and I can't believe I'm going to say this, I ask the hawk to a girl to hit me in the forehead. And this isn't just your classic heat wave that only kills some old people that no one cares about. The heat is so extreme, it's causing shit that no one cares about. The heat is so extreme it's causing shit that's never happened before. Blazing temperatures outdoors can wreak havoc inside airplane. These soda cans all exploded on Southwest flights due to extreme heat exposure. The problem is widespread. Southwest Airlines

has reported about 20 employees have been injured by exploding sota cans this summer alone. What the hell? It's so hot that our soda cans are joining al-Qaeda. I don't want to die in a plane crash because a cherry coke. I want to die because the Boeing guys forgot to tighten the screw. I want to die because the Boeing guys forgot to tighten the screws. This is a disaster. What happens if planes have to get rid of soda? What am I supposed to drink on a flight now?

Whiskey? Then another whiskey? What am I supposed to mix the whiskey with another whiskey? Now I haven't had enough? You've had enough. This is clearly a reckoning, but I'm sure Uens will take this as a sign that climate change is a serious threat and not a chance for an idiotic photo op. At Death Valley National Park, they actually embraced the heat. Encouraging tourists to take pictures in front of the park's thermometer. Right now, hovering around 130 degrees. You can definitely feel the heat on your skin.

Honestly, it's definitely shocking. I don't know how anything can survive out here. Of course, nothing can survive in Death Valley. That's why they call it Death Valley. Guess what they sell it, Burger King, you idiot? Now, you'd think Park Rangers would be warning people about the deadly heat. But instead, they're getting in on the fun. Park Rangers have a tasty way

to show you just how hot it is inside your car. So Rangers at Sikuro National Park by Tucson made banana bread inside their car. Some other things you can make inside your car? Cookies, eggs and even stuffed bell peppers. Who stuffs a bell pepper? Yes, global warming means you can cook right in your car, which is great news for mine who restaurant, Louis Flax, Hyundai Sonata Chimichangas. The secret ingredient is wiper fluid. So yes, as we've known for a while, every year the earth is getting hotter and hotter

like me and Paul Rudd. And that's why we need every single government body working to fix the problem, instead of jerking us around with elementary school science projects. The National Weather Service put on a colorful display of the record-setting heat wave hitting Las Vegas. Check out this time lapse of the extreme temps turning crayons into colored cream. This interesting experiment really puts in perspective just how hot it is out there. I feel like if you could just sort of freeze that and then you know you make a little bit of art out of it. I is out there. I feel like if you could just sort of freeze that and then, you know, you make a little

bit of art out of it. I think so too. Right? Yes. Oh, that's cool. But I mean, really, not cool. Hot. It's great.

We're all going to die. Thanks, National Weather Surface. Now, we all know what it would look like if a pack of skittles got its period. So quick, safety tip, okay? If you're going to leave your kid in a hot car, remember to grab the crayons first. It's hard to know whether to be more worried about the record heat or the record stupidity. But at least when the earth finally explodes, we'll be eating delicious dashboard banana bread along the way. Ronnie? Thank you all the only one.

Studies show that other people also have opinions. So here with another installment of In My Opinion is our good friend, Charlemagne the God. Who? Who? Hey, now if you've been following the presidential election, you've probably heard the news that there's a DEI candidate in the race. That's right. That's right. Those identity-obsessed Democrats pick someone just because of their race and gender.

Tim Walsh was a balancing choice for her. He's white, he's male. We do know that they wanted to get a white male in the ticket, So he's going to be that one. Here's a really important one. He's an old white dude. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes. Thanks to affirmative action, there is an old white guy on the Democratic ticket for the first time. For the first time in about 17 days, okay?

I'm glad white men are finally getting that moment in the sun. Just make sure to wear enough SPF, all right? Now, you all know what's really going on. According to Republicans, Tim Walls isn't the DEI hire. Because to them, every letter in DEI actually stands for the same thing. Black, black, black, black, which means the real DEI candidate is Kamala Harris. She's a diversity hire. Of course she's a DEI hire.

100% she was a DEI hired. An incompetent diversity hire. This is a woman, this disaster whose only qualification was having a vagina and the right skin color. That's right. Having dark skin in a vagina is an instant path to the oval office. All right? If you don't believe me, take it up with Ronald Reagan's black pussy. Okay?

Okay. Listen, man, this argument is so stupid to me. If being a woman or a minority was the golden ticket to getting ahead in politics, then President Andrew Yang would have already done universal basic income and President Kanye West would have already changed the national anthem to gold digger. I mean I've looked at pictures of the last 46 presidents and it sure seems like there's one identity in particular that gives you a leg up. White, white man. I'm just saying Donald Trump would not have gotten the job if his first name was Donnell. All right?

He'd be evicted himself. He'd be evicted himself from his own apartments before his career could begin. But for the sake of argument, let's suppose Kamala was given a chance because of her identity. She still had to do something with it on her own. And Kamala has done a great job as vice president. Remember that one big thing she did? Me neither. And that's exactly what you want in a VP, someone who doesn't make the news.

A VP is like a carbon monoxide detector. You want to have one, but if it makes any noise, something's going wrong, okay? In fact, In fact, the last time I remember a vice president doing anything that made the news, it was this. Vice President Dick Cheney apparently broke the number one rule of hunting this weekend when he accidentally shot a friend in the face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, accidentally, invaded the wrong country after 9-11.

Yeah. Now did I think about it, Dick Cheney made the wrong country after 9-11. Yeah. Now did I think about it, Dick Cheney made the news a lot. Don't be like Dick Cheney. And this is yet another weird thing about Republicans. They always say that liberals are obsessed with race, but they're the ones who can't stop thinking about it. They had a blank slate to build a narrative around Kamila Harris. And immediately went 1860 on us because they got black on the brain. And

Republicans aren't only saying Kamala is too black. They're also saying she's not black enough. Early in her career she identified as South Asian. Now she is considered an African-American woman. Is she black? Is she Indian? Nobody knows? Kamala's Indian black heritage or whatever it is. She wants to be today. One year she's black. The next year she's of South Asian descent. She was Indian all the way, and then all of a sudden she made a turn, and she went,

she became a black person. Just to be clear. I don't know if you know this or not but you can be both. Yeah. And I don't I don't want to break your brains but two isn't even the most races a person can be. Yeah. Bruno Mars is the most racist a person can be. And we know what's going on here. All of these attacks are to paint Kamala as just one big phony. Going to Georgia two days ago and putting on a fake southern accent when you were raised in Canada. Whoa.

So wait, she's faking being black and she's Canadian? Well, that's the worst thing you can call somebody this year. Drake. And it's been a rough here for Drake. And if I were a white Republican, I'd be a little worried about Democrats flipping this on me. If Republicans are appointing themselves the black police, Dems could become the white police, because not all whites or Maga whites. You got kombucha whites.

You got cargo short whites. You got Stanley Cup whites. Both kinds of Stanley Cup, hockey and beverage. You've even got whatever kind of white JoJo Cia is. White people around the country watch that clip like, she's not like us, she's not like us. But honestly, I'm not even mad at Republicans for bringing up Kamala's race. They've got a job to do, and they're doing it the only way they know how. The real bullshit is the media for hearing the Republican talking points and treating

it like it's a real story. The vice president's racial identity has been in the news. Identity heritage is newly injected into the race. Why is former President Trump questioning vice president's racial identity dominated the headlines? The claims about vice president Harris's identity will probably make the headlines. The claims about Vice President Harris's identity will probably make the most headlines. What do you mean these claims will make the most headlines?

CNN, MSNBC, ABC, you're the ones who decide what the headlines are. Okay? Right. Right. These issues don't make headlines unless you put it in the headline. And none of these issues should be a headline. If a guy came up to me on the street saying, the vice president is a chameleon, she can transform from Indian to Black, I see't it.

I'd be like, well God bless you, sir. Here's $2. I gotta go. Okay. All right. Media, if you, sir. Here's $2. I gotta go. Okay. All right. Media, if you need headlines, it's not like it's a shortage of important issues in this election. You got immigration. You got the economy. You got reproductive rights. The best place to dispose of a roadkill, bear cub. Those are things that we need to be talking about.

Okay? Or maybe spend some time looking at how the GOP is already planning on how to need to be talking about, okay? Or maybe spend some time looking at how the GOP is already planning on how to steal the election by having corrupt state officials refuse to certify the results, getting corrupt judges to back them up before the whole thing goes to the corrupt Supreme Court that's already anointed Donald Trump or King, so now they can overturn the results of the election to declare him the winner to win win win win win win win win win win win the winner the winner the winner the winner to win the winner to win to win the winner to the winner to to to to to the winner to the to to to to the to to to to to to to the to to to to to the to to to the to to the election to declare him the winner in exchange for a new RV. But, hey man, what do I know? That's just my opinion.

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My new podcast, the weekly show. We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.