The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Mountain Cabins vs. Beach Houses | Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson

Episode Date: August 5, 2023

“The reason that cabins are the best is because a “ cabin has the tranquility of nature.” - Josh Johnson   “What about bears? There are way more animals that can attack you in the mountains, than can attack you in the ocean.” - Dulcé Sloan   As a follow up to our debate on summer vs. winter, it’s mountain cabins vs. beach houses this week on Hold Up with Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and writer Josh Johnson.   Original air date: November 10, 2022See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Survivor 47 is here, which means we're bringing you a brand new season of the only official survivor podcast on fire. And this season we are joined by fan favorite and Survivor 46 runner-up, Charlie, Charlie, I'm excited to do this together. Thanks, Jeff. So excited to be here, and I can't wait to bring you inside the mind of a survivor player for season 47. Listen to On Fire the official survivor podcast starting September 18th wherever you get your podcast. You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey everybody. Welcome to Hold Up. The show that's a whole lot. A whole lot of feelings, whole lot of emotions, whole lot feelings, whole

lot of emotions, whole lot talking about very little. We break down the things that are important to us, not things that are important in the world. And today we have a little bit of a part two. We have a little bit of a revisit, okay? Because we had talked a little bit back and forth about some seasonal things and everything, but today we bring it home with what I would consider the final form of those things, why people enjoy those seasons, right? Today, it's gonna be cabins in the mountains, versus beach houses. Get into it.

Brub-ba-ah-ah! How wrong can Josh be in two weeks? Back to back! Ah! Okay, so, I'm guessing that means that you want to go first then. You know, since you're so sure, you're so sure, you're so positive that I'm wrong. So I'm excited to hear. I'm, if anything, I'm, if anything, I'm, I'm, I'm, if anything, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to, I, if, if, I, I, if, I, I, I, I, if, I, to, I, if, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to, to, to, to, to to, if, if, if, if, if so sure, you're so positive that I'm wrong. So I'm excited to hear. I'm, if anything, I feel like I have a front seat. Tell me how wrong I am so that I can tell you how none of that applies.

Go ahead. Listen, it's not that you're wrong, is that you're not right. You know what I mean? No, no, don't do that you're not right? You know what I mean? No, no, no, don't do that either. Uh... If you want, you want to take me out with logic, you got to do it. You got to do it top to bottom. First of all, when in the history of you knowing me, have I always gone pure logic?

I'm just saying, you're saying how wrong I am. Like how like how wrong? But I'm talking about in general over the history of the podcast. Hmm. You see what I'm saying? Like it's not just today. It's not just last episode. Mm-hmm.

It's every episode. It's every episode. What do you say listen I'm just concerned for you you're concerned for me you should be concerned for yourself all right well you've had you've had plenty of episodes where you did well where you got the people on your side and and I think that maybe I think that maybe you've underestimated that I make good points too. Sometimes I pick things that people also like, you know, talking about every episode.

Yeah. You make great points. Mm-hmm. But they're just not right. You know what I'm saying? You make great points, but you just don't win. It's like a debate. You get points.

You know, there's like a, there's a knockout and then there's like a TKO. It's like, oh, you want this box match because the footwork, you know what I mean? So tell me what's so great about beach. Well, I just don't understand why I have to even to even to even to even to even to even to even even even even even even even even even to even to even even to even to even even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even to even they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they there's there's there's there's they there's they they they they there's they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they. they. they they there's there's there's there's a there's there's there's there's there's there of all first of all it's the mother fucking beach so like I don't even understand it's like people are like oh there's sand it's like you sound stupid shut up there's dirt everywhere sand is just a different kind of dirt there's just loose dirt there's just loose dirt there's soil there's dirt there's soil, there's dirt, there's sand. Okay? Sand is the herpes of dirt.

All right, it's gonna get in and it's gonna be hard to get out. You're not even gonna know that you have it until you know you take your shoes off. It's, it's a pain. No, no, we act like that sand is this mysterious creature that goes bumping in night that will just roll up on you and be like, you didn't even know that I was here. I'm sand. Like, no! You know where the hell sand came from? You went to the beach, didn't you?

Bada! They're sand. Okay? Listen, you have to, if you don't know the secrets of getting the sand off of you, okay? You got to let the wind do a lot of the work okay you got to shake stuff out before you put it in the car but also when you met to the beach you knew you was going to get some sand okay this is just part of the experience. You know when you go to a bar somebody might spill a drink on you but you still go to a bar? Mm-hmmral when somebody dispels a drink on you, that's gonna be very unexpected. Look, if you were sitting at a golden corral, and you were upset about any outside forces coming at you

and doing any form of damage to your person, your belongings, what you're wearing, then you are the one that's out of order, all right? When you go to a golden corral, you truly take your life your life your life your life your life your life your life to to to to to their their to their their their the are the one that's out of order. All right? When you go to a golden corral, you truly take your life into your own hands. I'll offer some what, some crab legs? Were the crab legs really worth it? Do they have crab legs? I don't know if they have crap licks. I feel like I might also be confusing golden corral with a different place I saw a fight over crab legs. Was that a Chinese buffet? No, but it was a buffet for sure and it was it was people. At first it was just tongs. A lot of tongs like snipping at each other like pop pop pop and then a couple hands and

then some tongs caught some hands and then everybody caught hands. Wow what a song. Did you know that we're out of crab? Who's we? Like as a culture, like as a people, like as human beings, the crab is gone. Wait, what? You look up, um. What are you saying right now?

So you're saying, we are out of crab. Like, I think allthink all this like there's a billion crabs that we don't have I didn't make this up as a article look it up on the internet. I'm not I'm not saying you're making anything up I'm trying to understand how much out of crab we are when you say oh do you mean America? They're saying that billions of snow crabs have disappeared from the waters around Alaska. Scientists say overfishing is not the cause. Oh, it's, I wish it was us. It's worse that it's not us. Ooh. So then wait, if you go to one of these crab places and you order crab, is it not crab?

Well, we just, I think we just found this out like a month ago. Oh. So the shock and awe of many billions missing from the population is worth noting, that includes all the females and babies. The Bristol Bay Red King crab harvest will also be closed for the second year in a row, the agencies announced. Oh shit. I mean, it looks like cabins just got a little bit more appealing, all right?

There's going to be no crab. Because, I mean, come on, you got to go to the cold now. First of all, this is snow crab. This wasn't hot, okay? You get crabs hot though. I'm saying, if things that come to the beach the beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach beach the beach the beach the beach the beach the beach the beach the beach the saying if things that come to the beach are dying off, right, so if there's no more crabs just going to be running around scooters scooting at the beach, right? No, no, no, no, these are different crabs. These are Alaskan they.

It's only the Alaskan ones that are disappearing. Yes, it's only only the last and one. There's billions of them missing. They don't know where they're at. I don't know. Maybe they just need to turn left. I don't know where I'm not a scientist, obviously. It was a theater major. But you having a good seafood treat is one of my favorite parts of going to the beach because I can tell you I don't know what black people are going to do if we're at snow. that's at snow. that's also my concern. As soon as I heard it I was like, that means the gumbo's gonna be lacking. Bro! It means the buffets are gonna be weak. It means your crab boils is gonna be a problem. Yeah we need more black climate scientists specifically for this. Skip all the other stuff even if we we're going to die in a decade, go ahead, skip all that. Tell us how to get the snow crabs back. I'll tell you what. I'm going to help

you out right now and I'm going to tell you why cabins in the mountains are superior. You won't even have to worry about any of this duels. You come to a cabin, you chilling no this is not a beach problem this is not a beach house problem the beaches are a problem the beach houses are a problem okay no no no no no you can you can't hey hey no no because I'll tell you right now the beach house you let's talk about the dangers okay let's talk about just the dangers okay let's the dangers you thing let's talk about the dangers Okay, let's talk about just the dangers you know beach house. I'm gonna go to the beach every day. Oh, I'm so happy right Sharks you got sharks. Okay, you already are way more sharks than there are bears eating people, attacking people, slapping people. Hulk, no, there are not. People interact with bears way more than they interact with sharks. Crazy people on purpose, yes. No, no, no, no, no, no. No.

No. No, no. You are more likely to get stung by a shark. People always use this shark equivalency. It's like, oh, I get attacked by a shark. Bitch, you could have got in a car accident on a way here. Because you know people are provoking sharks. Let's not act like that. But also, so you can't say, oh, you got attacked by a bear because you're provoking a bear. No, sometimes bears ain't here with the shit. Let you know I'm not here to play with you. You should have opened this trash can. You knew I was coming. Stop playing with me.

Don't act like the people are getting attacked by bears. Yeah, but there's also panthers. There's panthers. There's panthers. There's mountain lions. There are very aggressive deer. Like there are way more animals that can attack you in the ocean. So we really really the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to let the to let the to to let to to let to to to to the the the they. I the the the the they. I the people like the people like the people like. I the people. I the people. I the people. I the people. I the people. It the people. It is the people. It is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I. I. I can't. I can't. I can't. tha. that. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. the mountains and they can't attack you in the ocean. So we're really going to skip jellyfish. We really going to skip stingrays.

We really got to skip. Sharks, jellyfish? Huh? You can see a jellyfish coming out. All you gotta do is just swim away from a jellyfish. All you gotta do is not run up on a mountain lion. Like, like, mountain lions run up on you. I've never heard of a person getting attacked by a mountain lion the way I have a shark. I feel like mountain lion is the lowest on this list.

Is it? I don't know. I bet you, here's the like, I will say, I can already concede this point technically that I feel like we don't hear about them as often, but I can see how people be going to those national parks and be touching bears and rubbing up on bears and stuff, and then bears slap them and accidentally kill them, right? Yep. But that's still not a cabin though. The national parks is not a cabin bear.

So are we talking about houses in the mountains? So are we talking about the beach right now? We're the the the the the the the the the the. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the. thous. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the bears. the bears. the the bears. the bears. the the the the the bears. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the mountains as a concept as a label? Oh, houses in the mountains. Because we're not just talking about the beach right now. We're talking about beach houses. Okay, so we're not talking about beach homes. Yeah, beach homes. That's why I brought the storms. Because I was like, guys, this is great property to own in between hurricane seasons. I mean, listen, those tornadoes go to mountains?

Do they? I don't know. I'm not a meteorologist. I feel like, this is going to sound real dove. I probably got to get judged in the comments. But I feel like when the tornado hits the mountain, the mountain just break it all up. Like it just, it it hits and it even storms but it doesn't like go through it doesn't like hopscotch up the mountain to keep destroying stuff.

The way that it does on a flat land. Yeah yeah because tornaes don't have legs like that. Like it's not like a Tasmanian devil that's just gonna jump up and keep spinning. Because hurricanes just go in a way that like feels disrespectful. Like I grew up in Louisiana, so I've witnessed hurricanes just act like buildings weren't in the way. Yes. But I've never seen, like I've seen a tornado, right? Because when we moved him back to Miami, there weren't any major hurricanes that hit while we lived there. Okay. We moved there right after Hurricane Andrew, which devastated all of South Florida. I understand like having a beach house, like, yeah, it's like you're worried about flooding,

you're worried about hurricanes, but like when you live in a cabin, it's, you know, you have to worry about forest fires. You have to worry about, you know, snow can get heavy. Snow can melt if there's, you know, it could cause a lot of water damage. I mean, there's different hazards that you have with living in both places. What I can say is that, one, I don't believe to go into the mountains in the summer. In the same way that it is pointless to go to the beach beach the beach the beach beach the beach the beach the beach the beach to the beach to be the beach the beach to be the beach the beach to the beach to to the beach to to to to to be to to th, th, to to th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi, thi believe to go into the mountains in the summer, in the same way that it is pointless to go to the beach in the winter. Okay, so we're still leaning on seasonal peaks. Yeah, because it's like the beach is the most enjoyable when you can, you know, legs out, titties out, you hop in and out of

this ocean, right? And then as someone who thinks that a vacation in the summertime summertime summertime summertime in summertime the summer the summer the summer thumumumumumumum, thii thi thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is to thi is thi is thi is to thi is to thi is thi is thi is thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the thi, thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is to thi is to thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is to thi is to thi. to to to thi to toe toe toe toe toe toy toe to to to to to thi. thi. thi. thi. as someone who thinks that a vacation in the summertime is only a beach. Having a beach house and a place that's not like I've been a beach house in like Atlantic City and I'm like that wasn't like old Jersey sword situation. I'm just like I know y'all don't know no better. That's why you think this is nice. Mm-hmm. Also, Yankee beaches are just not great anyway. Where's the best beach to you? Oh, I'm, you're giving me a Caribbean. You're giving me, you know, the, like, Marco Island in Island is pretty in Alabama.

The Gulf is very pretty because it's like they're really clear, clear water. And when you go to like Fort Lauderdale, like Ola Beach, Biscayne Bay, South Beach, like the Keys are very beautiful. When I went to Turks and Caicos, oh my god, that was fucking gorgeous. So you have like a clear water stitch, you know what I mean? But like, also the good thing about me in a beach house is like that thing that people talk about like, you know, having to drag stuff down to the beach

and you know, the sand and all of that. It's when you don't have to tote stuff back to the car, it's a totally different campaign. Like I had a condo on Tybee Island I think for my 30... 2018. Okay. So you think my 37th birthday I think maybe, 36, 37? I don't know. We just had a condo just across the street because all the ones on the beach were like time shares and shit. Yeah. So we couldn't get in. So all we were just across the street and as somebody who grew up going to Tybee Island and it was we were in we drove down for the day or we would go up to Hilton Head and we drove down and

then you spend all day at the beach you have to toe everything back to the car and then drive four hours back to Atlanta. to the to the to the the to the to the the to the the the to the the the the to the to the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to the the the the too. toe. And the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. the they. they. th. I I I. the. the. tree. tree. tree. tree. tree. tree. toe. tree. toe. toe. toda. they. they. th drive four hours back to Atlanta. So be able to just cross the street and go to the beach and then go back inside was amazing. But like as a kid, so when I was like 9, 10 years old we lived in, we lived on North Miami Beach. So like we lived in the, so you ever seen that show Sweet Life of Zach and Cody? Yeah. That's what we were. So it's like we lived in the, we lived in the, so you ever seen that show Sweet Life of Zach and Cody? Yeah. That's what we were. So it's like we lived in this hotel.

Okay. We had the kitchen, the housekeepers would watch us. German tourists taught me how to swim. There's like a shopping mall on the bottom floor. And every day I would just go swimming in the the th swimming th and this was like I think all of fourth grade for me make most of fourth grade for me or at least half of it was so I've lived on the beach your girl is a life Joshua no I believe you I guess my thing is when it comes to a cabin for me there's a fireplace all right there are cozy places to read okay I that that their tho that their thi thi thi that that that that that that that that that that the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. thooooooooooooooooo. their their. their their their their. their their for me, there's a fireplace, all right? There are cozy places to read, okay?

I can stay, I can stay nice and warm, right? And I'm not talking about hot. Am I talking about beach, hot, sweltering, burning my skin. I'm talking about a nice, warm throw over me, right? Like a little throw or even an Afghan on me, okay? I'm smelling scented candles. My question is, are you holding a cup of tea with both hands? If I need to.

Ha ha ha ha ha. If I must, then I must. I'm telling you. Oh, you make me so worry. I feel like, I feel like even if I can get one of those, what were they called, Oh, a snugggy in a cabin. Her Snuggie is still out here? A Snuggy is definitely out here as seen on TV.

Come through as they don't tb. As worn by me. I will lay on a couch. Reading. In a cabin. Back. It's I listen I have done the cabin thing right. Okay, okay. I've done the cabin thing with the group of friends. Mm-hmm. Quote unquote.

Oh, jeez. Listen, it was a couple's thing. Oh, my God, the wildest thing was said to me. There was a gentleman, you know what, never mind. And so, you know what, fuck it, because it's wild. So someone there was making chicken pop pie for dinner, but like a big one for us to share because it was like six of us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And one of the guys in the group said he couldn't have chicken because he and chicken had had the same had the same had the same had the same had the same had the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same same same the same the same same same same the same the same same same the group said he couldn't have chicken because he and chicken had the same

blood type. So what was actually happening was that this this person that was brought by another person his wife his wife has been married to a chicken this entire time. She's gone though? She's out here. And that's messed up of him too. Because that means that he's really fallen in love with the oppressor. All right? That's hilarious.

Because he probably just sitting there. Yeah, people just been eating his cousins, everything. He didn't say anything at the table, you know? And I'll even go ahead, I'll go as far as saying it. I'll say it right now. And people may be thinking I'm going too far, but I don't care, all right? I don't know this person at all, but this, this person that you're talking about those on this trip with you, that's a house chicken, okay? John Stewart here. to the tooe.

John Stewart here, unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, the weekly show. We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio, on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. Oh my God, I saw, ooh, I saw this and I was trying to figure out, I remember we had a recorded day. So one of my friends posted something on Instagram, I had to, um, let let grind Josh Know about The greatest version of you

It's not the I can do anything version of you The greatest version of you is the version that has parameters no I don't do that I don't drink that I don't go there with these people I'm focused I have a prize that's in front of me. Music, all right? When I say music, when I say bars, all right? The only thing harder than these bars or prison bars, okay? And they're the prison of not living up to your potential, all right? If you want to stay locked up in mediocrity, if you the the the the thi. thi. th. th, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, has thi, has thi, has that has that has thi, has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has that has thi, thi, thi, thi, has thi, has thi, has th they're the prison of not living up to your potential, all right? If you want to stay locked up in mediocrity, if you want to stay in the clink, all right, if you want to stay in the clink of the mundane, all right? Do you want to stay in the pin of the practically not even here, all right? Or do you want to break loose?

Do you want to unchain yourself? Do you want unbound yourself by grabbing a little bit of discipline, grabbing a whole bowl? A whole bowl? You ready? A whole bowl? You ready? A whole bowl? Of can't stop me won't stop me? So we take the can't stop me won't stop me. We grab the pinch of persistence. We grab the little bit of discipline, okay? And you stir it up with a spoon, all right? And you know what the spoon made of, right? You already know what the spoon made of. You already know. You can guess if you want. You already know.

Dedication? Nah, wood. All right. You're going to take a wood and spoon, all their spoon, all right. And when I say stir, sometimes people stir, they stir until their arm is tired until their wrist is weary okay but what you really got to do you guys stir until you know unt to you know beon Shia have a doubt that it's mixed it's seasoned it's ready it's it's warm is not hot you know and if it was cold maybe you stirred it up fast enough,

you got it hot again. I can't with you. Bless. Bless, we're blessed right now. How does your brain do this? Do what? Grind? You know, I wish, honestly, Dole say, I wish I knew another way. I cannot imagine what the person listening to this is thinking, because it's like, is it beach?

Houses are not. It's like, what are you? No, it's cabins. It's cabins all day. Nothing like a snowy little walk, you know, can see your footprints in ice. I can see my footprints in sand. Mm-hmm. And you got that saying all between your toes. All right, it's never coming out. It ain't ever coming out. It's never coming out. All right. As soon as you get it in there is in there what I'm looking for is I started out with two sets of footprints okay I want to see that two set of footprints and turn to one and you know what happened in that's when he carried me you know do you know why he carried you because that sand was dirty all right? Are you saying you're like being barefoot, Josh?

I don't mind it, but I'm not like. I mean, I know you have tie your feet. Hey, don't put that out there. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Because you know people are never going to see my feet. So last thing I need them think is that, is that half that half that half that half that half that half that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that tha that tha tha tha tha tha tha thi is thi is thi is thi is thi. thiomomome is thathea thiome's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thathea thathea thathea thathea thathea thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi that thi thi thi that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the last thing I need them thinking is that is that half my shoes not real. Yeah. You're thinking I'm wearing a woman size six. Look.

I'm never telling you anything. I've seen your shoes. Hey, look, I'm doing my best. All right. I just don't love. Hey look I'm doing my best all right I just don't wear the same size. Like I said we wear a nine like I wear like a nine nine nine and a half in men's you wear what a nine nine and a half in men's? The reason that cabins are the best is because a cabin also has the tranquility, all right, the tranquility of nature that you don't get at a beach house because there's too many beach houses and you got people, even if you had a private beach, which is rare to

get a private beach. You're still sharing that private beach with a bunch of other people. Unless you have millions, that private beach is not that private. Neither is the fucking forest. No, no, no, but as far as people wanting to go, people being up in your business coming close to your cabin, that's much rare. You can have a cabin in the mountains and it'd be the only cabin for a couple miles. A beach house, there's no beach houses where there's not another house for a couple miles. All right, I mean good luck with that level of money. Just I think that my

figure is much more accessible. Okay let's see. Hold on we got the information. 183 bear attacks in North America between 2000 to 2015, and there are over 40 bear attacks around the world every year. Oh, oh, I see. I see. So how many people died from getting attacked by a shark last year? And then how many people died from getting attacked by a shark last year? And then how many people died from getting attacked by a bear? Okay. The deaths of both will be much lower because some people get slapped by a bear and then they run.

And if the bear doesn't chase them, they live. Because I thought this video, this lady, she was just like hiking and then this bear came up and just tapping her on her legs and just like sniffing her and shit. like tapping her on her legs and just like sniffing her and shit. I think they know we're afraid of them. Mm-hmm. So then they're just like, hey. Yeah, it also. I'm gonna go fuck with these people. We're right back. They can shoot you. It's like, nah, nah, nah, no, they jogging. I'm gonna be alright. And then they just go through smacking white woman in the legs. And then they're just they they they they just just just just just just just just just they're they're just just just just they're they're just just just they're they're just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just they're just just just just just just they're just just they're just they're just they're just they're just they're just they're just. they're just they're just they're just they're just they're just they're just. they're just. they're just just just just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just. they're just and then they stand really still and they're like, all right. And then they start, because like this video like he was tapping her on the legs, he was licking her on the legs.

Then they just started sniffing the young lady. And then he just walked away. Yeah. I mean, I 't think can hear. And it's not a scream when you're underwater. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It would be wild if a shark caught a scream bubble in his ear. Is that a real thing that happens or is that just some cartoon shit?

I don't, I don't know exactly. Okay, this is gonna sound very dumb. I tried it as a kid. We all try to th in in in in in in in in a swimming, the swimming, the swimming, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, th, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, the the th Okay, this is going to sound very dumb. I tried, we all tried it as a kid. You were in a swimming pool and you went underwater and tried to scream and nothing happened. I feel like, okay, this could be completely wrong. So I'm letting you know right now. I'm not saying I'm right about this. I feel like what happens is when you scream underwater, the sound waves come out of your mouth like they would if you were above water, right? Yeah, okay. But the air bubbles aren't full of the sound waves. So it's kind of like how we can, how dolphins taught us sonar is because they're making

those noises and the sound still goes through the water. The sound wave still travels through the water, but it's not in the, in the air air bubble air bubble air bubble the air bubble the air bubble that air bubble that that the air bubble that the air bubble that that the air, the sound wave still travels through the water, but it's not in the air bubble that came out of your mouth. So they probably could hear us if they were close enough and if they could like hear well, but they're never going to hear us like that because that's not how. Like I would love if you could scream into a bubble underwater and a shark bites it and their mouth is just full of screams, that'd be amazing. That'd be incredible. I just don't know if it's the case.

I just don't know if it's the case. I just like that a shark biting a bubble. Just like, ugh. Just some human screams in its mouth. I can't imagine screams tastes good, you know? It's not even how they taste, it's probably how they feel. Mm-hmm. Just a little rumbling. I was like, that's why it feels like this. I didn't ask for that. I was just trying to eat something and all I felt was a rrrh- Now I gotta kill one of y'all. I have to, how would you do this to me?

I'm a good shark. I'm out here, just swimming and shit. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast. The weekly show. It's going to be tha to be to be to be thi to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to betell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, it's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that

they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about? On these earnings calls? We're going to be toing toding toding to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to te. te. Excing about to te. te. te. te. te. te. So exciting te. Soxiiiiiiiiiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing thiing. Soxing. Soxing. So. So. So. So exciting. So exciting. So exciting. So exciting. So exciting. So exciting the the the the the the the the the the te. So, te. te. te. te. te. teliiiiiiiiiiiii. So, teli. So, teliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Soxiiiiiiiiiii. So. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance, it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. When you get offered to go on like a trip with somebody. Like if somebody goes, hey, let's go on a trip.

Where would you want them to ask you to be going? I would be more excited to be going on a cabin trip or on a beach trip? I think it would be cabin trip for me because I know that with a cabin, we're getting way less personal, you know. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not going in and out of the, of the house the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, that, that, th, the house, thou, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that with, that with, that with, that with, that with, that, that, that, that, th, th, th, th, the the the the the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the the the the the the the the the thou, th. tho tho tho tha, that that,'m not, I'm not going in and out of the house that we're renting while people are trying to change into bathing suits and stuff like that. I'm over here just like, you know, I'm going to read over here, maybe you all want to read over there, maybe we play some board games, maybe we watch a movie together as makeshift family, all right? Maybe we just take a walk. We take a nice snowy walk. We enjoy the silence, the sound... So you're saying that for a cabin to be enjoyable for you, it has to be wintertime? Because you keep talking about cold shit.

Yeah, yeah. I think, you know what, I will say though, the one edge, and maybe you're into the spring as well, but the one edge I give cabins over beach houses in the regard of season, is that a fall cabin is just as amazing as a winter cabin just in different ways, because you're watching the leaves change and it's like not as cold so you get a different type of hike or a different type of wildlife around you like you're still seeing the squirrels and stuff. It's just a nice breezy season, you know. I can concede that the spring at the beach is also probably great because it's not as hot so it might be better into a certain degree. So I can concede that fall in a cabin is probably great because again leaves are changing, you know, we're about to go into the habernation.

So that makes sense. And like winter in a cabin is so and then like you know, because the thing is like when you're in the mountains in it's like summertime. With all the leaves, you really can't see the forest for the trees. Because all of the leaves, you can't really see anything. It was your, it was your point, but you still said it like you didn't want to say it. You were like, good, so it was the leaves or trees of the thing. It was, I mean, it was a cliche thing but like you said it like I had said

it nine times already like it's like oh this stupid point I got to make a good but no so like if you're in like the cabin and summer time and all these trees good you know because they are you know you know because they are you know. you're in the like the cabin and It's summertime and all these trees, you know because they are You know, deciduous and not evergreen you know, they got all their leaves and stuff just being green and stuff and You know, you can't see the other mountain because all the trees and shit in the winter time all the leaves are gone. You know, all the leaves are gone. Oh Oh, oh, there was this guy who had started dating, you know, the mechanic years ago, and we went on one date and then he wanted to take me up to like this mountain times, like his

time share up in the mountains, like for a date, like to spend a weekend with him. And I had to be like 22, 23. So of course my answer was like, I want to die on my own time But like I sometimes regret not going but I also know I didn't know him well enough Mm-hmm to enjoy a weekend in Last montane like in a cabin in Yeah, yeah, you can't really beat yourself up for that one that's this is part of life where you were being cautious? I'm like, that's thus that. The thus thus thus that. th, th, th, th, th, th, thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. thi, thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to thi to thi to thi to to thi to thi to thi thi to to thi thi thiiiiiiiii to thi thi thi thi th? Yeah, you can't really beat yourself up for that one. That's just part of life where you were being cautious. And it's one of those things as well where like, I look back at that time, even to the pandemic, I'm like, man, I should have just bet it all on real estate.

And then I'd be, I'd be in a different tax bracket right now you know but we don't know we don't know we don't know we don't know and plus my mom was like no just met this man mm-hmm I was like I'm not gonna murder you and I was like that's what murderers say yeah but to be, it's also what people who don't murder say. So it's like, there's really, you're really stuck between it a hard place. No. Tomato, to bottle to murder. Tomorrow.

But no, it's fine. He was not my husband. I don't know who is, but wasn't that guy. So I can say that I've never understood when you go to cabins in the woods why those people don't have curtains. Oh, that, okay, to be fair, A, the, I will give you that. I've stayed at cabins. And I was like, there should be some. Give me the choice of looking outside. Like don't give everyone the choice of looking in. Right. I'm not gonna lie. If I keep going to cabins, I'm gonna start bringing my own curtains. I am. I can't do it again. The last cabin that I say that it had it didn't have any curtains and I was like so

whoever rolls up to the house and don't be wrong we're far out so it's not like. But crazy but still you know should have brought my own curtains. She brought my own car. I better brought extra sheets and just throwing them up. The windows are so big and arethey're so high and there's never a ladder. So I'm like, I don't need to go all the way down. I just needed to go above my head. It is the wildest thing. But you know what always has curtains? What? Beach house baby boy? Always curtains always has curtains might even have shutters you're not seen in that house all day also you get the doors right kick a cool breeze through that hole it's a nice time okay just being able to

be at the beach and then ooh let me go up here get a little drink get a little beverage right because should we tell the people you know what let's tell the people so I have put together should we tell the people? You know what? Let's tell the people. So I have put together. Wow. Yes. Yes.

What a wow. I didn't think you were capable. I did not think. Always expect the unexpected baby. So listen, listen, I think, hold on, I think we can figure this out. We're two people who are doing well. Okay. We got the words of my mom, we got good jobs, multiple revenue streams, okay? So, what if we find a way to practically figure, to practically figure this out? Yeah. So it's we go on a beach trip and now we have to go on a cabin trip.

Okay. Yeah. Because I haven't been on enough cabin trips to have a good reference point for what they're like. Yeah. Right, and multiple ways to show you that you're incorrect. So like I need, but you have to show me ways that I'm like, you don't agree, like you're going hard. For a house made entirely of hood in the mountains, right?

I'm going for home beachside manner, right? Mm-hmm. How do we test these things? I mean... We're going to do a trip! I'm with you. I'm just saying, I think that there's going to come a point where the people listening have to ask themselves, we have to ask ourselves, do you go for like a fun and loose summer,

or spring, or super cozy fall or winter and I think that you can beat but the thing is just curling up with a book sitting up chilling in the cut you don't forget the board games you can do board games at the beach you can do card games at the beach you can have like outside you could do cornhole you go you know you can toss horseshoot you do all these things you can do all these things you can do card games at the beach. You can have like outside, you could do cornhole, you can, you know, break, toss, horseshoots, you can do all these things. You can outdoor game it, baby.

You can. It's a different energy though. It's a different, it's a totally different energy to everything that you do, whether you go to a cabin because you know when you go when you go to a beach house you'll even see it spring break is a great example you get the beach houses hey nobody's really trying to cozy you know everybody's trying to smash that's just that's just life you know that's a real thing that's that's what that's if you're going to like a beach house with your friends Or you're going to a cabin with your friends. It's like we have like resorts and stuff.

Like there's not really like a lot of winter resorts unless you're going skiing. And guess what happens at winter resorts? People trying to smash. Sure, sure. I think a resort situation is just people trying to smash. A resort situation, that's true. I just th. th. th. th. th. th. try to smash a resort situation? That's true. I just feel like the the potential smash at a Winter resort is a little bit more cuffing. I think it's a I think it's slightly more. This is gonna be the person for the trip as opposed to like The beach is just like ah, you know, it depends because if you're at a resort and you're there for a certain number of days,

you hook, it's like, it's like camp. If we hook up, we go to, if this is a two-week camp, we're together for two weeks. Now for some three-month camp, it's a different situation. Well, look, I think this is a perfect time to kick it to you, the listener, you know. Have we made our points or any points at all? Great question. Great question. What the fuck have we been talking about for the past, what, 45 minutes? At least. At least.

Did we help you figure these things out? Where do you stand? Where do you stand? Or did we do what we always do? And just tell you stuff. So, you know, tell us how what you think. Is it beach? Is it cabin? Or are you like, Itell us what you think. Is it beach? Is it cabin? Or are you like, I don't like either one? I just want to go to a lake. Yeah, a lake. I didn't even think about that. I mean, yeah, to me it's just dirty water. It's been around too long.

Right. At least the ocean moves. This is new water every time in an ocean. We just want to say thank you so much for rocking with us, being great listeners, always hitting us with topics and ideas and everything. You can check out, hold up wherever you listen to podcast. You know that because you're listening right now, but you could also tell a friend tell a friend and see what they think maybe they agree with me maybe they agree with Dulce like maybe you can have your own arguments at home it's like a board game but with talking yeah and we're we need to come out with the hold-up board game or app or any other ways to talk to people about things that make us go hey hold up and please please please please the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they're they're they're they're they're thi. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they'll they'll they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they'll they'll they'll th. they're th. th. th. the. the. the. tog. tog. tog. te tog. tog. th the the the the the the the they're they're they're they're talk to people about things

that make us go, hey, hold up. And please, please, please, if you have topics for us to talk about, we're gonna try our best to talk about them, or we might get confused to start talking about it. Because what an attack on the black community. I mean, truly, yeah. Like it's starting to feel personal. It's feeling very personal because I am somebody who we've been in a crab boy a place before,

you know, we can't, cat, cat, cat, we get it in, baby. You've never seen Josh Johnson break down a crawfish. Brue, the young man is from Louisiana. Don't sleep on Josh. Me and Josh are going to the beach baby. I'm taking Josh to the beach. I am going to put this together. We are going to figure this out. Should we do a hold up after. Should there be a part three? That'd be very funny. Listen, we went summer. We went winter and now we at the beach in the winter? Look at God. Won't he do it? Look at geography, just working.

I'm taking Josh here to the beach, and then Josh's gonna take me to the Montaneus, to the Cabon, because I wanna see if this man is right. I'm gonna be under all the blankets, okay? I'm gonna be drinking two cups of tea at the same time. All right, I'm gonna have a real book and a Kendall and try to see if I can beat myself catching up on my reading. Fair enough. Or I'm just probably gonna just challenge Josh to Uno games and bother him all day.

You can lose anywhere, okay? Whoa! You have never beat me at Uno ever! Y'all, thank you so much for listening to hold up. This thing is out of the whole mind. How dare you? And we appreciate you. We love you and be safe. God bless. God bless. And you have never beat me at Uno.

Put my name in the streets like this. Fuck is wrong with you! This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Survivor 47 is here, which means we're bringing you a brand new season of the only official survivor podcast on fire, and this season we are joined by fan favorite and Survivor 46 runner-up, Charlie Davis to bring you even further inside the action. Charlie, I'm excited to do this together. Thanks, Jeff. So excited to be here, and I can't wait to bring you inside the mind of a survivor player for season 47. Listen to On Fire, the official Survivor podcast starting September 18th, wherever you get your podcast.