The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Still vs. Sparkling Water | Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson

Episode Date: May 7, 2023

“We all need to drink more water, but sometimes you just want to have a little adventure, so sometimes you infuse your water and sometimes you add bubbles. ” - Dulcé Sloan “You don't need this sparkling, bubbly water. You don't need to be burping bougie.” - Josh Johnson It’s still vs. sparkling water this week on Hold Up with Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and writer Josh Johnson. Original Air Date: April 6, 2023 Hold Up  is a podcast from The Daily Show. Listen to new episodes every Thursday wherever you get your podcasts, or watch at YouTube.com/TheDaily Show See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. What's up, ears edition, listener? It's Dulce, Sloan, correspondent for the Daily Show. You're about to hear an episode of one of our original Daily Show podcast. Hold up, hosted by me and daily show writer, Josh Johnson. It's where we take our office banter into a weekly war of words about topics big and small. In this episode we debate still versus sparkling water. We go back and forth on which version of H2O were

truly quench you thirst and why I prefer bubbly water or as Josh calls it burping bougy. Tune in for this fun debate and if you like the show check out the holdup podcast wherever you get your podcasts. And were you drinking by the way still or sparkling? I was drinking still I can say that. Boom! Boom! Because it's smart water. Yeah, yeah, see even you, even you in your private moments, you go still. You like calm all those bubbles down. Hey everybody, welcome to Hold Up.

It's a big show about little things that really aren't anything. I am one of your co-hosts. My name is Josh Johnson. I'm a writer for the Daily Show and I am joined by. Doze Slaan. I am a correspondent on a daily show. I'm also a stand-up comedian, like Josh. I also am a crafter. I like going along on locks on daily show. I'm also a stand-up comedian like Josh. I also have a crafter. I like going along along with Lottom Locks on the Beach and

like I said before, being in the mall with your daddy so. Mm-hmm. Somebody's daddy. That's who's been talking to me recently as fathers. Yeah, if you've been binge listening. In the mall with your daddy is a real theme. probably one of the strongest themes of this show. th. th. th. th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi thi thi thi I like I like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like like I like I'm like th. I'm like th. I'm like th. I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like like like like like like like like like th. I like like th. I like th. I like th. I like th. I like th. I like th. I like th. I th. I th. I th. I'm the the the like the the the the like the the. I'm the the theat the the th. I'm like th. I'm like th. I'm like th. I'm like th. I'm like thi the the the th real theme. Probably one of the strongest themes of this show. We've held on to in the Mall with your daddy longer than anything, longer than I've been doing a Manisphere content longer than I've been grinding. In the Mall with your Daddy has been consistently in every episode for quite a while. And yeah it's a true movement you know you know you never know where you're going to be called upon yeah because malls are dying and dads don't get enough love and so to mix the both of

them together to really say screw Amazon moms and let's go full mall dad's. Wow incredible. I applaud the work you do. We're on a start episode because I mean it's actually it's already been started it's already turning up and you know what we need because I don't know about you I think you might you might be at home right now but from where I am recording it is hot yeah all right it is hot like a place Mmm that I hope to never see it is hot it is it is sweltering You're warming at podcast studio and the the lights don't help all right it is I am yes I'm

burned up but it brings me to today's time. Can you send my brother some water can you send them a cool beverage? Today and I want you the listener to thin. th. th. th. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, the listen, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I I I I I I I I I I I'm, I'm, I I'm, I'm, I I'm, I'm, I'm, I the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I'm thi thi thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, the thi, the th. the. th. th. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. thi the. the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm to today's top. Can y'all send my brother some water? Can you send them a cool beverage? Today, and I want you the listener to think about who ended up on which side, all right? Because today, before we tell you, we're gonna let you know right now it's still versus sparkling water. Listen, what I challenge us today is, we can both see both sides of this corn, right? Both sides of this coin. But I think the listeners are going to think, oh well Josh is going still and don't say it's going sparkling, right? You don't want him to play the music?

You know what? Play the music! Play the music! All right, listen. Joshua, tell the people where you stand. Oh, you were right. I am still. Okay, we knew. We knew. Mm-hmm.

We knew. Well, I want to say that the reason that I chose sparkling, and I think the reason that sparkling is getting the shine that I chose sparkling and I think the reason That sparkling is getting the shine that it's getting It's because Everyone's trying to drink less sodas. I was never a big soda person. Okay. Um because they were always too sweet for me Which I know people looking at me aren't gonna believe but believe. But guess what? Most of the time obesity is genetic, you bitch. So I can say that a lot of time it was too sweet for me, but I really do enjoy it. Also we have to remember when

it comes to the sparkling water. One, I think it's an interesting term Yes, yes it is why don't we just say bubble water Because bubble water sounds like you're drinking plastic The name bubble water just doesn't roll off the tongue like sparkling like if you went to a nice restaurant? They walk up to you hands behind their backs, you know the way that they lean over the table? Like, like, the way that they the table the table? Like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th is the, the the, the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their is is is is is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they they they te te te te tooooooooooooooooooo. tea. tea. tea. they. they. the the the they walk up to you, hands behind their backs, you know, the way that they lean over the table, like can we interest you in some still or bubble water? You'd be like, the second one doesn't sound real, so I'm going to take the still. Okay, I was do wondering where they picked sparkling because it does seem like a very high-end thing. I think that my, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thi. theeeeea thea thea thea thea the way the way the way they're they're they're they pick sparkling because it does seem like a very high-end thing. I think that my my thing with sparkling why I don't really drink it and why I pick still over it is that the best waters that I've ever had have all been still I think that when it's still you pay attention to the taste more because you

know sparkling is a it is a taste in a sense you know? Well yeah because you have like but the thing is like there's a difference between like you've got a seltzer and then you've got like club soda and then you've got like club soda. And seltzer that's that's a lot of uh, Selters truly just drinking bubbles. Yes, yes. Like, there's no water in here.

You've seen the person that was like, uh, sparkling water is just spicy. Yes. Somebody like, um, there's like McDonald's Sprite is spicy. Mm-hmm. And then somebody said, uh, hotel air conditioning is the AC version of McDonald's Sprite?

I was like, yes. Yeah, yeah. All accurate. But it's little dirty gets the job done. Right. But the bubbles, like the bubbles and club soda, club soda is giving you an accentuating, an adjective to your beverage, right?

Got you. Okay. In the words of Black Forager, the beverage, Alexis. We love her. Who knew that I could eat magnolias? I very much enjoy water. I always, we all need to drink more water. But sometimes you just want to have a little adventure. So sometimes you

would infuse your water. I love an infused water, spa water. Oh did you see the thing? I think it was like over the summer. Where it was like I guess this white woman had never heard of like Agafreska before. Oh yeah, yeah. And they were calling it spa water? Yes, yes. I did see it. All of like, and then like Latino Tick-Tock or Latin-Ti-Tick-Tock was taking like white people things. Mm-hmm. And like they, uh, and it's just like, uh, it's like, oh, a hot dog was like, oh this fun taco, this fun tacos. Or like a

burger was like a torta or they would take all this like white people shit, it'd be like, yeah, we're just gonna, the same way your lap, you tried to like steal, oh you took water and put fruit and you like, it's like no, somebody's like, no, bitch, like the girl did the thi th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th-like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, like, like, th. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, did the whole recipe for like, I think it was like fres, aga-frosca. And she was like, oh it's like strawberry spar water and everyone was like, no! No, it's not! Yeah, it's- It's agrofrosca, you goofy bitch? It's just so not. And so, sometimes you just want a little divergence, you want a little fun thing, you want to throw some fruit in some water, so I get it, but also have you heard this that sparkling water doesn't hydrate you? Yeah, I was just about to get to that. That's why I picked the still. I don't understand that. This is my thing. This is my thing. How? Mm, okay. First of all, you know, we're just going to get to that that, that, that, to to that that to that that that to that that that that that that that the that the the to that that the that that the the the the that the the th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi their thi thi thiver their their their thiver thi thi thi thi thi thi, but thi, but th, but th, but th, but th, but th, but th, th, th, th, thi, to to to to to to to to thi to thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thiii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. This is my thing. Does this my thing? Hmm. Mm. Mm. Okay. First of all, you know, we're just going to get to that moment a little bit earlier than usual.

Okay. Okay. We're just going to go ahead and and hit it up early, all right? All right. For my men out here, fighting on the grind. Okay, you need to be hydrated Okay, you don't need this sparkling Bubbly water you don't need to be burping bougy all right? You need to be hydrated with the elixir of life with with the body of the earth into your body so you can sweat so you can have? So you can have water that the water that comes to the water that? the the the the the th, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. the, the, the the, theat, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. the the they. the the the they. the the the the theyeeat. the the the the the the the the the the the the elixir of life, with with the body of the earth into your body so you can sweat so you can have water that comes out of you that you're drinking, right? It's a version of that because you can sweat out the toxins, okay? You can't do that off sparkling water. You can't do that. If you try to work out and have sparkling water, I bet you pass out. Or you'll sweat bubbles. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, th you, th you, th you, th you, th you, th you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, the, the the the the the thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th, th, th. So, th, th. So, th, thi, thi, thi. tha. to to tha. to tha. to tha tha. tha. tha tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha, pass out. Or you'll sweat bubbles. Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you, Dulce. Do you really want to be out here trying to grind, trying to get the man's shoulders with bubbles coming out of your body? All right? grind with bubbles, bubbles too soft, okay? Did you imagine being in a gym and you just see, blob-dlob-doo-doo-doo-bood. When you out here bench pressing and you're putting in so much work that you're sweating, that you're just shooting water out of your pores, you don't want bubbles in your pores,

it'll kill you, believe me. Believe me. If you get bubbles in your pores, you're gonna die, all right? I wonder what would happen if you put another gas in the water. Like can't you put another thing in it? Like we've put like a bunch of, can't you put a bunch of oxygen in the water? Like can't you put another thing in it? Like we can put like a bunch of, can you put a bunch of oxygen in water? Can you oxygenate water? You can oxygenate water, can't you?

You're asking the wrong person. Oh, you also have a theater degree. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You get your minerals in, all right. Yeah, yeah. You get your minerals in. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you. Yeah. Yeah, you. Yeah, you. Yeah is the best nutritional, you know? You get, yeah, yeah, you get your minerals in, all right? Okay, okay, okay. They add minerals to the water. Okay, oxygenated water is a relatively new functional water product that has oxygen added

to the canning process or bottling process. The added oxygen is claimed to provide health benefits, including aiding exercise recovery, flushing out toxins, toxins. the minerals minerals, the minerals, the minerals, t. toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, tops, tops, tops, the minerals, tops, tops, tops, the minerals, tops, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, the minerals, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, you minerals, you minerals, you minerals, you minerals, you minerals, you minerals, th minerals, th minerals, and minerals, th minerals, th minerals, th minerals, and minerals, and t, tops, tops, tops, tops, tops, tops, tops, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxin minerals, toxi minerals, toxi, toxi. toxi. t oxygen is claimed to provide health benefits including aiding exercise recovery, flushing out toxins, and improving alcohol metabolism. Josh, are we about to get in the oxygenated water? I think if we get into oxygenate water and I'm already drinking green tea and I'm already eating dark chocolate I think I might be the healthiest man that's ever lived all right I think I might actually be so healthy I start floating that's what I want some people want to get big and strong and look all more more chastnutty I'm just try to float I'm so healthy we're not making that man no more we're not we're not print this nigging th th th this n th this n th th th this n th th this n th this n th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. th. I'm th. th. I'll thi the. I'm th. th. the. I'm the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. I th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'll th. I'll the. I'm the. I'm thea. I'm thea. thea. thea. thea. thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' the. I'm so healthy. We're not making that man no more. We're not we're not printing this niggin out no more. I don't know what I think you had to be born in the 70s. He drinks still water

all right I'll tell you that right now that dude drinks a bunch of water. He has to his skin is Christine it's honestly like wild. This is the thing he's one of those dudes We're just like I know he's like I know plenty of married men women try them all the time People try like women men whoever there are married men who get tried by people all the time and I've heard married men tell me plenty of Married men have said when they had their rings on there was women in their face or people in their face all the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tho tho tho th. they their th. th. th. th-I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. their theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. they're they're try. on, there was women in their face or people in their face all the time. He is one of those dudes where like when you find out he's married you just like respect and then you just back away slowly. Like I'm going to be as respectful to this man because some men you're like I'm married

and you're like and I'm sure pointed to there's also certain people where you're just like, and God bless your wife. Like you just want, like I don't want. Yeah, I don't want to come. His skin is so clear, it does look like he could melt. Yes. He's like chocolate, chocolate. Remember those acts by just spray commercials and people got mad because I guess it was like chocolate s s sacked. And there were like, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, th, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, like, thi, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. I thi. I thi. Like, thi. Like, thi. Like, thi. Like, thi. Like, like, like, like, like, like, likeented and there were like women like this woman on this bus like bit into this man like this chocolate man no I did not see this it was an X by the spray commercial this woman bit

into this chocolate man and people wanted to be upset about it and I was like I don't understand why people are mad about this this seems like a wonderful idea that is insane. But people got mad. Also, people also got mad at there was like a Skittles commercial. Mm-hmm. Where there's like, I guess things that didn't make sense and it was a Korean-Irishman. And people got mad at that too. Because it was this Korean man, but he had a red beard and a heavy Irish accent.

It was funny and shit. Now did, are there any Korean Irishman? I mean, there's Asian people everywhere. There's to be some, right? There's Chinese Jamaicans. Yeah. But still, when you, when it happens, we can't act, this is my thing, this is why I don't like when people do. Sometimes something will happen and people aren't even allowed to be surprised.

Yeah, like I was... The innocence of surprise can't also be... Yeah, see? There was a Jamaican restaurant in Miami that was run by Chinese Jamaicans. And there was literally two lines in the restaurant, people that had been there before and people that hadn't by Chinese Jamaicans. And there was literally two lines in the restaurant. People that had been there before and people that hadn't been there before. Because people that hadn't been there before needed a minute to process what was happening. So there's, and there were these two, like, it sounds like a movie. There was these two old Jamaican men, like black Jamaican men that would sit there like playing chess or some shit and they would watch people come in the restaurant and like at one time we came there was they were

I told the story for years I was a little girl the mother and the son were arguing in the back And you hear two Jamaican people arguing and then this guy. He's like, you know, he's never been there. He's never been there before he was like he, he was like, he was like, he was like, he was like, he was like, he was like, I, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was a this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a th. th. I was a th. I th. He was a thi, I thi, I thi, I tho, I tell. Hea, I tell. Hea, I tell. Hea, I tho, I was a tho,the register and the lady comes out. And she's like, you know, how can I help you? And he goes, uh, and she's like, yes, a Chinese are Jamaican what you want? And he's like, ah, and she's like, okay, stand over there. And then there was just like a line of people who are just processing Chinese Jamaicans. That's wild. And the line, the there was there was there was there was there was there was there was there was th. th. th. th. th. th. they was, th. th. th. It was, they was, th. they was, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. It's, they. It's, th. It's, th. It's, they. It's, they. It's, they. It's, they. It's, like, like, like food. Like it was like, oh you don't stand over there your waste in time. And so of course they were out of everything, like every good Jamaican restaurant is. But then there was a line to people and so but the guys were like, oh watch this,

like they would tap. They were like, you know I heard it was a good spot and they're just sitting here like, he's like, oh you've never been here before and they're like, no, he's like, he just went, okay, and then they were like very excited to see this man see Chinese Jamaicans for the first time. Yeah. But it's like, think about it as a kid the first time you saw a black person with a British accent, you're like, what the hell is? Yeah, what are you, what are you doing? What do you?

What do you? You're real good at that. Mm-hmm. That's a real good. And then, and then obviously you realize history. Yeah. And then you're like, oh, you know, wood and just, oh, but okay, cool, cool, cool, cool. But also it's like, but people are everywhere. So yeah, because when I was in Scotland, we went to a Korean restaurant in Scotland.

And I've been to a Korean restaurant in Australia. I guess I was going somewhere and look for it's more viable for there, because my two favorite foods are Mexican food and Korean food. And sometimes it's more plausible for there be a Korean restaurant somewhere. the their their their their their their their their their their, their, their, to to their, to to their, to their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, thi, thi, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, because like my two favorite foods are Mexican food and Korean food. And sometimes it's more plausible for there be a Korean restaurant somewhere than there is to be a Mexican restaurant somewhere. Because I remember we were shooting that TV show in London and they had like a Mexican restaurant that was like catering. And. And I was like, this is gonna be bad, but I'm gonna order it because I want to see how bad it's gonna be. Can you okay. Bloody terrible. Yeah. I was I was like this place needs to be I remember going Josh this place needs to be shut down. The the thing okay that I, you reminded me of when you were to to the to the to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to this place needs to be shut down. The thing, okay, that I, you reminded me of when you were saying like any good Jamaican

place, you know, they were out of everything, is that when I am in a place that's very specific, like we're talking like, not just a general country's cuisine or, you know, like culture's cuisine, we're talking like like super super specific when that happens just a ramen spot just like just a ramen spot and they're not out of anything and it's a little late in the day I'm like oh I'm gonna get poisoned yeah I mean like all you're doing is ramen how does everything on the menu available yeah like it's like if you went in a Jamaican place and they were like oh no we're fully stocked and it's like 7 p-in the th the th th th th th th th th th th th th the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. It's like th. th. th. th. th. th. It's like just like just like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. th. I's like, th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, like, th. It's like, that thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. It's like, th. available? Yeah, like, it's like if you went in a Jamaican place and they were like, oh no, we're fully stocked and it's like 7 p.m.

You're like, oh no. What went wrong here? I feel like sometimes it's like, I honestly have to go, oh, maybe you're paying attention to your inventory. Maybe, you wrote, that's when you rolled the dice. You're like, look, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, oh, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, oh, th, oh, tho, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. And, th. tho, that, that, that, that, that, that, tho, tho, tho. And, tho, tho. And, tho, tho, tho, th. paying attention to your inventory. Maybe. Is it you roll, that's when you roll the dice. You're like, look, maybe someone in the back is very good at inventory or somebody in the back is very bad at cooking. But we're about to find out. It is interesting when you go to a Jamaican spot and you're like, oh, y'all have everything. Like the place we went to in London. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think the two

Because we went like what two maybe three times Something like that at least two they were always out of the paddies Yes, yeah, the beef or the chicken the veggie they always had I'm like bro I don't want a vegetable medley wrapped and dough. Yeah, but yeah, yeah, why? Why? Why? Why now with a deep fried bready dough? Yeah, I mean that's that's the other thing I think still wins out because still is everywhere. Sparkling isn't everywhere. But maybe it's because sparkling is so new to us as a concept, as a label, you know, uh, because like as a kid you didn't really drink. Like there's so many water brands now.

Like it makes me, like when I see all these water brands, I was like, what if the water that we need? They're just sitting in these bottles. You know what I mean? Like, what it is like, like, like, the, the, the, the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, sitting in these bottles. You know what I mean? In the world? Yeah, like, when we like, it's like, you feel like, oh, there's a water shortage. And I'm like, yeah, because like, fucking pollen. Oh, yeah, we bottled it all.

And then we wouldn't, and then we opened a bottle, took a couple of sips. And now we can't figure out because I literally I was at a bar yesterday I think I think I thought I drank my water I think I drank someone else's water. What what happened? So I'm at this bar. You just sitting too close to him? No I had a water in my jacket and I threw my jacket over in the booth and I left and I was like oh my jacket with the bottle was like the top of it was like pushed in like it like it th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the tho tho tho tho that that that that that that that that the I the I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the to to to to to to too too too too too too thou the the the the the the the the th I threw my jacket over in the booth and I left and I was like oh my jacket With the bottle was like the top of it was like Pushed in like it fell down and I was like oh Somebody picked up my water and put on the table And then so I grabbed it was drinking it because it was a bottle of smart water that I'd gotten from work

and I knew it was my water because it was water in my jacket. And then I was talking this guy at the bar and he was drinking a bottle of smart water. And I'm like, I've never seen a bar with bottles of smart water. And I was like, oh shit. I drank that water because I knew it was my water because bars don't have bottles of smart water. And then it's like wait a fucking minute this might not be and by that point it was too late you know what but when I put on my jacket last night there was not any water in it maybe that was my water

where'd my water go? You know sometimes there's a mystery that just cannot be solved. Jimmy Hoffa, Amelia Earhart, yeah. Where's my water? Yeah, where's my water sounds like one of them? And were you drinking, by the way, still are sparkling? I was drinking still, I can say that. Boom! Because it a smart water

Yeah, yeah, see even you even you in your private moments you go still You're like calm all those bubbles down. Let's get that still in listen sometimes like if you've ever had I love doing like a fruit infused water. Yeah. And so I'll take a little fruit infused water and then I'll, maybe sometimes I'll do it with sparkling. Sometimes I do it with still. Sometimes what I'll do is I'll put a little like, petio light or this electrolyte, which I really like. Do you like that one?

Yeah, I like this one. This is a coconut flavor. Um, no, technically there's water in here now, but, mm-hmm. Coconut flavor is nice. It only takes a little bit like sunscreen, but it makes you feel like summertime. So, and you can do any type, I like a tropical fruit because it holds up more in the water. Yeah. But like a cucumber water is very good. Mm-hmm. Cucumbies.

Um, I can say that, for the fun factor, just, like, well, you're sitting up drinking like, fucking eight glasses of water, all this water is supposed to be drinking. Yeah. Sometimes you're like, I need to switch things up a bit. If you have like a whiskey and soda, right, it gives you a little something as opposed to just putting straight water in some whiskey. Because I'm not first you just do whiskey and water and I'm like, I don't, you sound 75.

So they just used to do less whiskey? No, you take whiskey. Like your little, you know, whatever, how much whiskey. And then they would just have them put in, like as much club soda someone would put in. Yeah. They would put in some water. So wait, okay. Wait, wait. They would... But they are watering down their whiskey. But anytime you put in a mix or you're watering down alcohol. What's the result? You're, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're a, you're a, you're a little, you're, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're a the, you're a the, you're a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, watering down their whiskey. But anytime you put in a mixer, you're watering down alcohol. What's the result? The club soda is just water with bubbles in it. This is just water with no bubbles in it. But the water is just straight water.

So the water is like diluting the whiskey. Isn't the club soda adding bubbles and some water? Yes. Because if the water in club soda doesn't have the same like makeup as the still water, it seems, it's like breaking my brain because I'm like, when you add club soda it feels like you're adding something when you add water It just feels like you're taking something away I understand what you're saying Because you'd also get it with no ice either Can I tell you when I worked way back when I worked to Julia's this woman came in and she wanted

um and she wanted, like basically a cup of ice water. She wanted water, and she was like, don't put any ice in it though. And I always used to do that because I know that the ice can take up so much space in the cup that you're getting less of your drink. But she was like, I don't want to get water down because it'll taste different. And I was like, it'll taste, the ice will taste, it'll, and she was like, yeah, it'll taste different if I let it,

if the ice waters my drink down, it'll taste different. And I was like, I thought she, for a second, I was like, oh, so you don't want water. And she was like, no, I do want water. I just don't want it to get. I know some people don't like restaurant ice. Okay. I know some people, they won't, like if you're on vacation, won't drink ice because the water isn't always filtered.

Yeah, yeah. I know when I was in the UK, they don't serve alcoholic beverages, like when I was in Scotland, I was at Enbro of French and they were saying that they only have ice for the Americans. Wow, because they'll make a drink. And they don't do ice. They don't do ice. So like the alcohol is room temperature. Mm-hmm. And say they get like a whiskey and a soda.

Both items are like room temperature. That makes sense because then people will come here and be like, oh, this drink is so refreshing. Well, nothing's refreshing at room temperature. Yeah, yeah. But they were saying that the reason they don't do ice is because it waters down the drink, but they're like Americans are obsessed with getting our ice in, yeah? Well, I think we love a cold beverage.

Mm-hmm. Also, I don't mind ice watering down a drink. That doesn't bother me. Because my goal is not to get fucking trashed. My goal is to enjoy an alcoholic beverage. And at the end of the day, it's like, I don't a hundred... Listen, no one enjoys the taste of alcohol. Okay. People enjoy the feeling that they get from alcohol.

Or you've had better tasting alcohol. But if we enjoyed the taste of alcohol, we wouldn't have cocktails and we wouldn't have mixed drinks. Sure. If alcohol tasted good, we'd have no screwdrivers, no gin and juice, no other things. Yeah, because it, it, uh, is smelly, it's flammable doing none of this shit. Yeah, because it is smelly. It is. It's smelly, it's flammable.

Mm-hmm. It could do a lot of damage to your body if you drink it on a regular basis. But I can't say that sparkling water, now it's like that makes sense because like the fact that just water, adding the broke your brain. Because it felt like it was taking something on what, that's so interesting. Clubstone felt like it was adding something. Yeah, it just felt like it was adding the bubbles, it was adding the, you know what I mean? Because I, I also think for your health and for feeling refreshed, still is the way to go.

I think that like sparkling is a more we're at an event or we're having dinner. We're having fun. Yeah, yeah. We're having fun. But if it's hot out and somebody basically offers you a flavorless sprite, you're gonna start swinging. Even if they offered you like a La Croy you'd be like, I am burning up. I don't need that. I learned that on the summer's day it was hot I was outside someone hand in L'Croi and I was like what a fucking waste of time it task it task to good we all love pumple moose but did I get the refreshing that I needed in that moment I did not? Okay I mean I mean I do love that the you know because there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's I there's I there's I there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there th in that moment, I did not. Okay, I mean, I do love that the, you know,

because there's different levels of, you know, bulbujas in your water. Mm-hmm. Some of them seem bigger than others. Coca-Cola seems to have the biggest, fucking bubbles in life. Pepsi seems to be bigger. I don't even like Pepsi. But I did have a Coca-Cola for the first th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I that, I that, I do that, I do that, I do that, I do that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I th, I th, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, I do thi, I thi, I life. Pepsi seems to be bigger. I don't even like Pepsi. But I did have a Coca-Cola for the first time in years about like two months ago. Mm-hmm. That mother fuck, it's not a bad, I get it. I'm not gonna probably be drinking again from five more years,

but, because I don't understand how you can drink Coca-Cola on a regular basis. I also don't. Like I've known people. Like I've known people like my grandmother drank it a lot and I was just like I don't get how this is I feel like now you just have a sugar craving Now it's more like oh you like the repetition. It's more routine now. It can't be for this flavor because she gave me some one time and I was like, oh, tasks like burn. It is heavy. It is heavy. The fact when you did experiment as a kid you put the tooth in cocoa colon and it's rubbery has always bugged me um you're drinking a coke your teeth feel weird but a cold cocaula does do something because a cold cocaul like a nice ice cold cola on a hot day we'll do more than a la croix I can't ask you this have you you you you you you you you you you you to have you to have you to have you to have you the to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have you to have to have you to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to to to to to have to have a to to to a La Croy. I can't ask you this, have you, before you wrap up, soda stream?

I've tried it, and it is not for me, but I respect a soda stream. I respect a soda stream in the home, you know, I respect someone's 24-7 access need for a bubbly water. Did you know, and this is where my listeners out there, I was at someone's house for a New Year's Day brunch, but there were a New Year's their party the night before. Everyone went home, we came back for brunch. They were doing mimosas, ran out of champagne. But people had brought like a couple bottles of white wine and I said, yo

Just put this cheap ass wine in the soda stream And it worked That's wild shit, but that's all champagne is it just carbonated wine. Yeah, yeah, I'm not fermented because fermented is different. Mm-hmm. It's carbonated wine, so you put the white white and I want and I want to hear I want to see all the comments. I want to see all the the the messages. I the the the the the the the the the the the the th???? the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this the the the the the the the the the the the the the cheap the cheap the cheap the cheap the cheap the cheap the cheap the cheap the the the the the the the the che chea chea chea chea chea chea chea chea chea chea chea chea the the chea tip the the the thea thea thea the the the the wine. So you put the white white and I want and I want to hear, I want to see all the comments, I want to see all the messages for people that took some cheap ass boxed wine, toss it into the fuck a soda stream and bam it's mimosa's all day baby. What is happening a lot? So let's kick it over to the listeners because I know that this is a constant conversation That we're all having right now Sparkling versus bubbles we all know the sparkling. I guess it had that gets rich people origins So that's why it's called sparkling because you know middle class and lower we would have called it bubble water and kept it moving you know Yeah, yeah, I mean look I just want to hear from y'all out there. Do you prefer when the server comes up to you, do you prefer still or sparkling?

Do you like the feeling of the bubbles? Do you like to watch them pop up to the top of glass? Are you a bit bougy? Hold on. I have gone out to restaurants recently and it's been still sparkling or tap. Mmm, mm, okay. Which is my still is coming out of a bottle. Yes, stills bottle. It's coming out of a bottle. And so somebody said to me, there's this comic on Instagram, I think his name is Mr. Red that I watch on Tick-Tock, because the Cuban guy does like the two parts between him and his girlfriend is absolutely amazing.

But they do like a sketch where they're at a on a date and the guy comes up, you know still a sparkling water You know tapy's like yeah, I'll take government water and Yeah, like a week where I would go out was like we want to go out? It makes you stop? It makes you stop? You know? Is it bottle is a bottle or is it sink? Is it bottle or is it sink? Mm-hmm and them is the question. Last they gotas that we have to ask in these streets because you never know whose municipalities you out here sipping on friend. You let us know. Let us know in the comments. We read them. We love them and let us know who you think did the better job of debating their side. All right. Are you are you with me? Are you gonna keep it still? Are you gonna be out here and the only thing still about you is your water because you're always grinding you always running you always putting in a work?

Or are you gonna sparkle? You gonna try to be a little star? Be a star? Be a star look look at you you you you you you you you you you you you you you the you the the you the you the the the the th the th the the th th the th th the th th the th the th the the th the th th. the the thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. thi thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tipe thi try thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the th gonna try to be a little star Huh, be a star. Be a star look it look at your girl check it out Beam Yeah, bam, hey him, I lift up my foot, but you know that you got to earn that you know I mean so I'm saying this We're always glad that y'all are listening to, you know, me and Josh just have these conversations about the things that you think are interesting. Please keep posting your comments. Please keep telling us what things you want us to debate because I'm telling you, I finally found the long Instagram message.

Yes, yes. And that lady, young lady put in a lot of work, so thank you friend. When we do yours, we will, I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will definitely, I will that I will, I in a lot of work so thank you friend. When we do yours we will definitely make sure that we shout you out. And let us know if you want us to come to your city, to your city, to your city. Yes, we're always touring. So if you check the links in the description, you can find both of us and our dates and everything. Yeah, and listen, me and Josh would love to come to your city, to your neighborhood, and talk about things in a public forum. Also, I'm trying to check out these malls, because guess who's in there? Yo, Daddy. Yo daddy. You'll have a great rest of the week into the weekend. We appreciate you. Wherever you get your podcasts. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 1110 Central on Comedy Central

and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.