The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Target vs. Walmart | Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson

Episode Date: August 19, 2023

"“Target ends up being better because Walmart is too busy being chaotic. You know what you didn't see when you went to Target, you didn't see a proposal on aisle eight. You didn't see someone trying on clothes that do not fit them” - Josh Johnson   “You've been working your whole life to not be a Walmart person. I, on the other hand, have always embraced the Walmart lifestyle..because when I try to become a Target person, I realize it requires too much drinking of wine and the overpaying for regular ass things.” - Dulcé Sloan   It’s Target vs. Walmart this week on Hold Up with Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and writer Josh Johnson.   Original air date: December 1, 2022See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Survivor 47 is here, which means we're bringing you a brand new season of the only official survivor podcast on fire. And this season we are joined by fan favorite and Survivor 46 runner-up, Charlie, Charlie, I'm excited to do this together. Thanks, Jeff. So excited to be here, and I can't wait to bring you inside the mind of a survivor player for season 47. Listen to On Fire the official Survivor podcast starting September 18th wherever you get your podcast. You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey everybody, welcome to Hold Up. This is a show about not much really. Like it's it's big topics but big topics to us.

Nothing going on to the world. It's just things that we feel very strongly about. And I am your co-hosts, Josh Johnson, writer for the Daily Show. I am joined by... Dose Slane! Corresponding from the Daily Show, lover, fighter and all around bad bitch. I remember crop top phase friends. And today we're talking. I also do comedy. I do stand-up, I act, I sing, I enjoy long walks on the beach. What do you like to do? Today we're talking about Walmart versus Target. All right.

That's my favorite. I love a Walmart. How do you feel about Walmart? Do you enjoy Walmart? Because Josh is gonna say the wrong answer. And I know people are gonna judge me. People are gonna judge me. Let's get into episode right now that if you're gonna come and be sideways like that, like try to do it close to the camera like it's all sweet and stuff, but really it's a dig at me. And I always recognize a dig at me and I, okay? I brought my shovel, baby boy. Did you bring your shovel? Are you having a good day? I'm hungry. So, tell the people what side you're on today. Listen, if the people know me and know what kind of classy as girl I am.

It would find Southern woman. I am as I walk in nature. They know I'm seeing Walmart. Wally, Wally, Wally, Wally, Wally, Wally, Wally, Wally. We have the Walmart. We have the Walmart. We have the, you haven't seen the, we at the Walmart? We have their walled, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-a, w-a, their, w-s, their, their, w-s, the, wa, wa, wa, wa-a, wa-a, I, the, their, wa-a, the, I, th-a, I, I, I, wa-a, way, way, way, way, way, wa, wa, wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', wa', I, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the the the the the, the, the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th'a, th'a, th didn't see the girls dancing I have not cared to see it but they got the Louisiana purchase card you know what a leading Louisiana purchase card is don't you and I am on the side of Target because you because what because what because here's

thing this thing I've been excited for this episode I've been excited for so long because so many times there'll be a thing where we're we're going you're you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the to the the the the the the to the the the the the the to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's like, th. the the the th. the th. the the the th. the their. the their. th. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their in my side, but how do I convince the people? Yeah. With this one, this is the first time where I feel like, you know, us being authentic to ourselves Yeah, has truly kicked your legs from under you, all right? The thing is tort. Hold on. But if we're being authentic to ourselves, yeah, yeah, you know for the history of your life, Mm-hmm. Up until you left the great state of Louisiana, Mm-hmm. You was a Walmart, nigger, and don't play me.

And don't play, you spent many of childhood days, many a Sunday, many a Sunday, in a Walmart. Don't you remember when they put in the groceries. I've been fighting my whole life to escape Walmart. All right? No, no, no, no. I've been working to get that target in.

I've been, look, look, all my life I had to fight. You know what, and I never like to say this, but Josh, you forgot where you come from. Hey, I hope I have amnesia. I have no problem for getting that part of my past. Listen, I remember in high school, I think the first time I see here in high school, out of this very cute little like outfit. So like a blue top and it buttoned up the back, because I could like, I like open like just a few of the buttons you know just to basically let my ass fit in the shirt and but also you don't give the give a boy a a peak of a lower back situation I was 17 after all and this cute little like matching like blue on white skirt I'm so sorry I'm so sorry I'm so sorry

because I'm not laughing at your thing now I'm laughing the fact that you said situation is so funny just because just because I'm so sorry I digress but if I I want to make sure I remember it so that we could get to your thing and they get back to it but like when I was in high school you said you were 17 right when I was at high school there was a guy I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I was th. I was a the. I'm th. I'm th. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I'm theee. I'm the. I'm th. I, but like when I was in high school, you said you were 17, right? Yeah, when I was at high school, there was a guy I knew who had a crush on this girl. And so we're all, in the scenario, we're all 60 or 17, right? Yeah. And then he was like, she had wore a short-sleeve shirt that day and he was just like, he was already admiring her top to bottom but he was like even her arms are sexy you know and and then he was like even her elbows and the elbows is the knuckle of the arm and I laughed so hard as you should have the knuckle as you fucking should have it's the knee of the arm the or the elbow the knee is the elbow the knee is the elbow of the leg is the knuckle that it's it's a joint the bands I remember they had they they they they they they they they they they they they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. I they. I th theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeck. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the the the of the leg is the neck. It's the neck color. It's it's a joint the bands

I remember they had us because I could never figure out why they wouldn't let us wear like We always thought it was stupid that they wouldn't let us wear like spaghetti straps the son of school's your bra strap couldn't show because why would we te to have respect for girls girls we could just cover girls yeah. Yeah, yeah, they, they, they, they, they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they could they they they they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th they th to try try to to try to try to they could they could they they could they could they they could they could they they could they they they they apparently, apparently that's the move. Right, like I'm not I'm not an antique car. Why the fuck am I under the strait? Yeah. So, listen. And so you were had the lower back situation go. At a lower back situation and so this one of the popular girls who, when she was talking to me I couldn't figure out why she was talking to me. Because I wasn't popular but I was friends with the people who were popular. Also I've really never spoken to this girl before. And I have, and you know there's a little like they had these beaded sandals that came out because I remember those beaded bracelets they were like, this is cords, this is Jade, this is da da da da. They put it on shoes or this girl comes to me. thr. this. this, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. I, th. I, th. I, they. I they. I've, they. I've, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're like, like,thought I was a gang member. But I just really like blue.

And this girl comes to me, she's like, I really love your outfit. I was like, oh, thank you. So where'd you get her from? I was like, Walmart? And she's like, you got clothes from Walmart? And I was like, bitch, this outfit and I was like, her clothing from Walmart. And I was like, and they're still cute. So what? Yeah. Look, I'm not saying that Walmart doesn't have good product. No, I'm not saying what happens in a Walmart. No, no, no, no, no. Listen. Mm-hmm. This is how I knew Target with some regular shit and people trying to make it better than it was. When people started calling Target Tarje, I was like, nah, bitch, this is a regular ass fucking store.

Because guess what? These cheap-ash jeans in here is the same cheap-ass jeans and a Walmart. We're not playing this game. All Target did was make their prices a little higher, and then they're like, okay, we got red and white, we're gonna put a filter on put a filter, we're, we're, we and what we're gonna we're gonna put a filter on these lights we're gonna make it because the thing is a Walmart is soothing as a Walmart is for me it is slightly chaos even when it's calm down even when but you have to understand a country-ass Walmart

because I went to college in country-ass, which college in Gainesville, Georgia, right? And there was a mall across the street. On a Sunday, people would park at the mall and walk across the street to the Walmart to the Walmart shopping center because there was no fucking parking in that Walmart. And I'm gonna tell you what, it was not as chaotic as a city. A city Walmart is wild. I go on a Target and get a bunch of shit I don't need. We all know you're going to Target, you get one thing, you spend $200, right?

That's not correct. That's what I'm saying? You go in to target to get one thing. Oh, oh, I thought it. The thing cost. No, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, things, than, things, things, things, things, things, things, thin, thin, things, thin, thin, things, you, thin, you, you, you're, you're, thin, thin, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you. the thing. the thing. the thing. I's, the thing. I's, the thing. I's, the thing. I's, the thing. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's, the thing. I'll, the thing. I'll, the thing. I'll, the thing. I'll th. I'll th. I'm going, we'll th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, we'll. th. th. th. th. th. the thing, we'll, yeah. And they end up, you're like, what the fuck happen here? Mm-hmm. If you spend $200 on Walmart, you brought half the store. That, look, look at, look at, one things I was discussing with some of the producers, even before we started, was the Black Friday situation at a Target or Walmart, right? Now, the Black Friday... They're both chaos. I've been to both. I've been to both. the the the the the to to the to the to to to $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $. I th. I to $. I th. thi-I thi-I $200. thi-I $200. If thi-$1. If thi-$. If thi- $ $ $200. If thi- $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $. If th. If th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi Friday. They're both chaos. I've been to both. I've been to both. I even went to a Best Buy Black Friday.

But I will say that a lot of people forget the levels of Black Friday chaos, okay? Because Best Buy is up here, because we already come through with all the electronics, right? Right. Target is actually much lower because people forget that they have the electronics, right? Target is actually much lower because people forget that they have the same electronics as Walmart. So to your point before of like, Target just has what Walmart has, but it's more expensive and everything,

I don't go to Target for my electronics at all, you know? I don't go to Target or Walmart for electronics. I've bought TVs from Walmart. That's not true I bought TV from Walmart, but I knew that I could get it cheaper at a Walmart that I could. Because the thing about Target is like Target is like Target is like, tare's like, okay. In California, Target gets sometimes an anchor store in a shopping mall. Mm-hmm because of the demise of a Steers or a Macy's or a JCPenay, they've become an anchor store because they've been able to adjust their aesthetic to not really be like, because listen, if I can buy wine,

draws and cat litter in here, I don't give a fuck how you adjust this lighting. I'm in a Walmart. You see like I can still, like I can still, um, now this is where we're going to disagree. I'm buying power tools th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th th th th th th the th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho thuol thuol thuol tho- tho- the the the thu- thu- they's they's they's they' they' they' they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they' they's the they's the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. the th. the. the of the of the of theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat they're they're they're they now this is where we're gonna disagree. I'm buying power tools, I'm buying dog food. People blame Walmart for like, oh, but what about the mom and pop stores in an area? Does Target not do the same thing? If the target comes in your neighborhood, if you were a clothing store, if you were a small electronic store,

if you did whatever the fuck that they sell in a Target, isn't Target doing the same thing? It's a big box store. It's like when you're a butcher or some shit and then a grocery store moves in your neighborhood. Now isn't it the same shit? It's not quite the same though because Walmart goes much, much further that Walmart and this is this is even a credit to your point All right, this is something that I will concede up top Okay, a Walmart for all of its sections in the overall store, especially a supercenter, right? Yeah It has a mom and pop of each thing in there whereas Target does not so target is not

So target is not going to come through with a full butcher and certain meats that are on sale that week or whatever. Target also doesn't have the bakery section. It just has the things already lay it out, baked, you know. Right. So my thing is, for the mom and pop situation, I do consider that more of a Walmart thing because Target is just being the box. Like, here's what we have. Yeah, because it's like, because I remember when they started putting grocery stores in a Target.

And I'm like, okay, so you're going to close even the giant grocery store. Because the thing is, it's like, it like it's not trying hard enough with their grocery section because there's not, it's like there's not enough food in it. And then Walmart, it's just like, we're gonna, like Target's like a section of the store. Walmart's half the fucking store. Target's a selective lady. All right. She's not out here loose with all the groceries with all of the electronics with all she not try to be everybody. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. It's not. It's the they's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's with all she's not trying to be everybody everywhere doing everything all right she has her particulars no she sells everything under she sells everything on on her private label mm-hmm but you know that a lot of that private label stuff is made by larger companies 100 percent yeah I'm not I'm not denying that at all. I don't think that there's a target in the back of target that's making all the target stuff.

You know what I mean? These aren't like Kebler elves doing target things, right? I understand. Target is very good at selling target things. Ummart is very good at selling everybody's things. Mm-hmm. Walmart is very good at selling everybody's things. Everybody's things. Walmart's like, we got it. But the thing is like with Target, so it's like,

because, you know, there's a great value brand of Walmart. We're fully aware. It's like the private select of your Kroger slash Relps. We know that people have generic store brands of things. I can say that the I would rather have a Kroger chocolate sandwich cookie than an Oreo any day of the fucking week. Yeah, yeah there are things exactly like that that that all of these stores do very well. This is you touched on like the trail mixes. Target that that whole aisle. That large section of mixed nuts of various

backgrounds and denominations. I need a bigger cart. I need a bigger buggy. Wait, do you call them carts or buggies? I think I called it a buggy when I was little and I was in Louisiana. I call it a cart now. Maybe you got out of the south before earlier than I did. Because I didn't leave so I was like 334. Now I call them buggies and I have to like if I'm around certain people I had to make sure I change my terminology because people if you just call a cart a buggy people are acting like Yeah, I didn't deny the Holocaust. I just fucking said it was a but the way the people react to certain things being called something something something something something something something something something something. th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, like, I th like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, like, like, I was like, like, like, like, like, like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I'm, like, I'm, th. th. thi, like, thi, like, thi, thi, like, thi, thi, like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, like, I thi acting like, yeah, I didn't deny the Holocaust. I just fucking said it was a but the way that people react to certain things being called something, because like other than on Instagram I realize my mother calls sunglasses,

shades. And I've always called them sunglasses and she's always called them shades but I always what the fuck she was talking about. And sometimes I go, oh I can't find my shades and people because you like, what? Huh? John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, the weekly show. We're going to be talking about the election. Economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcast. I do like the fact that

Walmart's like, here's the stuff. Mm-hmm. Have the stuff. Target on the other hand is trying to, I don't believe Target as in. You have, you're curating things, you're creating a vibe. Now, mind you, is a Walmart employee helpful? Absolutely the fuck not. Not usually. It's the old person at the door, right? And then if you're a country Walmart, they're slightly helpful.

If you find an older employee, yes, they know where things are. Someone could be stocking something in the grocery section and you can ask them where something is. And they will go, they're, the things is. And they, not, not, not, and things, and things, and things, and th th things, and things, and th thing, and thi, not, not, thi, not, not, not, not, thi, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not the the the f the f they they th, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not. Not the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f the f. Not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, the f. the f. the f things, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the f-things, thi. thi. thi. thin, thi. thi. thi. thi. the f-tip thi. the f-the the f-tip thi where things are. Someone could be stocking something in the grocery section and you can ask them where something is and they will go, I don't know, you're like, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you. You're a Walmart employee. You don't know where anything fuck is. You need something out of electronics, you're going to wait 20 minutes for somebody to show the fuck up. Or two, you never know. That's why there's, you can't, well, like if you're going to get something like, I need a TV out of a Walmart, call ahead, order it ahead.

Do some, help yours, help you, help you. Because sometimes a Walmart employee user is, they're not going to do anything or their most helpful fucking person you've ever met. There's rarely an in-between. They're walking through the store with you hand and fucking hand, right? Well we gonna get some of this, we gonna do this, what you gonna need? Bada da da da, because I can't tell you, that's the one who was on the road heavy, doing them colleges and shit, when super Walmart started closing, I was like, what happened to the account? You're telling me I can't walk in this Walmart in three in the morning and get some popcorn, some ice cream and dog food? That's what you're telling me? You're telling me I can't walk into a Walmart at 245 in a good Christian morning, okay?

And get three stakes, a USB cable, and a wrench? Is that what we're saying now? This is my issue with Walmart, because you've touched on it already. Walmart has everything, the way that you put it. Now, you know, it's for everybody. And why isn't Target? Is the question? So is the internet. The internet is for everybody. And you already talked about the fact that it shouldn't be either. Yeah, look what it is. Look what it is. And th. And the the th. And the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're th, you, you're th, you're th, you're, you're, you're, you're, you've, you've, you', you', you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, you, th, you th, th, th, th, the th, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, th internet. The internet is for everybody. And you already talked about the fact that it shouldn't be either.

Yeah, look what it is. Look at what it is. So you're saying the target, so target discriminates, please, go on. It's not about discrimination. It's about not having every single thing so that you're not mixing so many different demographics of people. There are people that come to Wal-Bart with specific emergencies at play that don't show up to Target because they know Target doesn't have it. Because Target doesn't have a pharmacy? Is that what you're saying? No, no, no, it's not just a pharmacy thing. I think some target do have a pharmacy, I think. They do because CVS is in something. Yeah, yeah. But when you have someone that needs a particular store that goes to a Walmart instead, and you do that enough times to to to to to enough to to to to to the to their their their their their their their their their to their their their their to be their to be to be to be to be their to be tooomk. their. their. tooome. too. too. too. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their the. I. Ie. And, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, a Walmart instead. And you do that enough times to where you create a Venn diagram of people who, oh man, I'm doing a project on my house and you grab some power tools.

Oh, I have a wedding. I need to pick up some. Oh, I have all this stuff, right? And then you put it all in one place. You get the Walmart. But Target has power to have power t. the power. the power. t. t. t. t. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. th. t. t. to. to. to. the the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. tog. I'm. t. tog. I'm. I'm some, but not only does Target have a party section. Target not only has a party section, they have their own private label, party supplies. Right? So Target picks and chooses what like the trail mix aisle? Beautiful. Mm-hmm. You've never seen macadamia as used in such a way.

Now, is this a $35 bag of nuts? Yes. Are you gonna buy it? Yes. Because you try not to. But you're like, ah. But this is my thing. This is, you're touching on exactly what I'm talking about. They have a whole trail mix aisle.

They actually don't end up having as much of a sliced peaches aisle as Walmart. So Walmart will have a whole aisle of like the sliced fruits in the cups for the kids that you pack in the lunches, right? Target's got like two choices. Hold on the way that you said the screws that are the slthe screws are the slice for the kids and the packs the delicious, it's just It's like when people would do Cosby jokes. No, you got the sense for the kids and the slays for the, I can't do Cosby. I mean, hopefully none of us can do Cosby. Truly. It's a, it's an impression that brings no joy. I saw a comic doing an Obama impression the other day and he's not even 30 years old. Yeah. And I was like, what are we?

Mm-hmm. He's a very funny comic. Mm-hmm. But I saw him doing Obama. And then another comic was like, ooh, topical material. And we both, but we, we had, I think we had to walk out of fat black. But I was like he wasn't old enough to vote for Obama. You were, it was probably an elementary school.

I was a grown ass woman dancing in the street to my president is black when Obama got elected. I was out of college. This nigger wasn't probably out of diapers. I can't even I was like how long did you wait to do this then maybe he was out pull-ups perhaps I don't know but he was wet to bed age well fucking Obama was president and he's gonna suppression he was at least wearing the overalls he's at least wearing overall you're still in your ash gosh be gosh yeah which is what I always accused opio of wearing by the overalls. He's the least wearing overall. You're still in your Ash gosh be gosh. Yeah. Which is what I always accused opio wearing by the way. I think this is my this is my my other issue is that you're not taking full responsibility. I'm gonna take responsibility for shit I don't know them niggers what's talking about. On the Walmart side you're not taking responsibility

for the absolute chaos. Because Target doesn't have an auto center, okay, the thing is I can't. I can't be responsible for the chaos of a place. Oh, you can't. If you picking it up the place that I've never. My place with no chaos. I have almost no chaos. You know this chaos. I've seen chaos in a target. It was at a lower volume. But it was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a the. It was a the. It was a the. It was a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. It's. It's. It's. It have almost no chaos. You know this is chaos that I've seen chaos and a target. It was at a lower volume, but it was fucking chaos. I would much rather take chaos at a lower volume than the chaos of a loud volume. If we got chaos up full volume, I might die. I'm not, I'm not a survivor like that. I hear you. I hear you. If I am in a Walmart and things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things things th th th th thi thi. I thi. I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I the if I am I'm I am I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm not if I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm not if I am in a Walmart and things go left, do you say? You will be speaking Do you have parked in the past tits, okay? If things go sideways in a target, I just know to step to the right and it will not be my problem anymore.

I there is because of the price points Mm-hmm between a target. Thank you. And I want to the want to to the right and a wall. I want. And to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the right. to to the right. to the right. to be to be to be to be to be to be to to be the right. the right. to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to they. they. the the the the the the the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toe. toe. to to to to to to the to be the the to be. anymore. I there is because of the price points. Mm-hmm. Between a Target. Thank you. And a Walmart. Yes. You are dealing with demographic, different demographics, people. Because Target forgot where they came from, okay.

Target used to be very affordable. And I looked and I was in Target and I was like, what the fuck. I remember being a target. There was another, the this other woman were standing there in like the home decor aisle Mm-hmm like and I picked up this like accent pillow and it was 50 fucking dollars. Yeah, and I was like, is this pillow 50 dollars? And I heard this pillow 50 dollars and I heard this woman go what? What? And I said, this pillow's?? this? this? this? this? this? this? this? this? this pillow's th? this pillow's the the the th? the the th is the other? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Me? Mea's this this this this this this other is this other is this other is this other is this other is this other is this other is this other is this other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is the other is $ $ 50? thi? thi? thi? thi? thiolooooooo? thiolooo? thi? thi? thi? the other woman is thi? the other is thi I heard this woman go, what? Turned. She's like, what?

And I said, this pillow's $50? And she was like, why? And I said, why? And so me and another grown adult were like, I was like, I'm not in Macy. I'm not in Nordstrom's. If any store that's not fucking Nordstrom gives me a $50 pillow, it should be burned down. It. I. And I. And I. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this is, I, I, I, I, I was, I said, I said, I said, I said, I's. this is, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I's. This is, I's. This is, I's. This is, I's. This is. This is. This is. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. I, I, I, I, I, I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. It is, I's this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is, I'm, I'm, I said, I said, I said, I'm, I said, I said, I'm, I'm this is, I'm this is, I'm this is. I'm this Nordstrom's if any store that's not fucking Nordstrom's gives me a $50 pillow Mm-hmm. It should be burned it like how dare you? Let me I'm fucking do first of all a $50 pillow in general as a concept as a movement as a label Nonsense. There's not gold in this pillow. This pillow is not gonna hold me at night this pillow is not gonna I'm not gonna pour water on it all of a sudden. It's a man of my fucking dreams. It's all. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi the thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the thi. the the the their thi. their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi. I thi. I thi. I this pillow. This pillow is not gonna hold me at night. This pillow's not gonna, I'm not gonna pour water on it and all of a sudden it's the man of my fucking dreams.

It's all made in China. Why the fuck is this $50? My issue is that, okay? Let me, this is, this is where I feel like we have to address. You're dealing with tra poa pies. You don't fuck a Walmart. thakakakaker. tholk. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. It's, thi. thi's thi's thi's thoom's thoom-it, it's thoom-it, it's thi. It's thi. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, it's, it's th. It's the thin. It's thin. It's all all all all all all all. It's thr-I's all all all all all all just just just just just just just just just just just just th th th th the th th you didn't fuck with sweet potato pies because you've had bad interactions with sweet potato pies. Uh-huh. You don't fuck a Walmart because you've been working your whole life to not be a Walmart person. I, on the other hand, have always embraced the Walmart lifestyle. Well, I will continue to embrace the Walmart life because when I try to become a target person, I realize it requires too much drinking of wine. And the overpaying for regular ass things. Let me, they're still a fucking department store.

Let me explain, all right. Live your life. But you know what? Target's out here, they're not helping. They're not doing Lord's work. They're trying to make you better. You put a Starbucks in this bitch and you think you better? Kmart was out here selling hot dogs and shit.

We ain't nobody got no love for Kmart no more. And what did Kmart do to anybody? How did they go out of business as a concept? I'm really always trying to that you about. My thing is, you're missing the taxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, taxes, taxes, taxes, taxes, taxes, taxes, taxes, taxes, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to th. th th th th th th th th th th to, to, th. are you talking about? So yes, you go to target? You're going to target, all right? But you know what you didn't see when you went to target? You didn't see a proposal on aisle eight.

You didn't see someone trying on clothes that do not fit them. Yes, no, no, no. every store that sells clothing has people trying on clothes that do not fit them. I'm talking about egregiously not fit. I don't mean checking to see if it fits. I'm talking about in college, we would go to Walmart, right? And one of my friends would just see if he could fit into a small when he knew he was in Excel, just to walk out of the dressing room and we all get a good laugh because he looks like a big baby. And it was funny. It was very funny. He was spot on. I've seen people do that in an old navy. So I'm not. Clearly there is an epidemic in this country if people try to

all clothes they know don't fit them. Because it's the it's the Chris Farley fat guy in a little you know you know a little coat. Yeah. People love seeing a grown man's belly button. Especially if he's in a shirt that makes him if he's when he's pulling Donald Duck in this shit. People love no one's asking you for Mickey Mouse. They're asking you for Donald Duck. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. that's. that's. that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. to. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. try. ti. the. the. the. the. they're. they're. they're. this shit. People love, no one's asking, I'm here asking you for Mickey Mouse. They're asking you for Donald Duck. That's what they want. Winnie the Pooh gave us the,

Winnie the Pooh is the reason I have the courage. This is the thing, and look, look, no, no, no, no, no, because I can feel this happening. I finally have a good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good thoen, I'm a good thoomeou gaiteou gaite. tooom. tooing. tooing. tooing. tooing. I'm tooing. I'm tooing. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm this happening. I can feel this happening. I finally have a good one. I finally have a good point at a good subject. And all you've done is deflect, distract, divide, okay? You say, what in the history? You could feel me, you could feel me having some good points and you were like, ooh, let me hit them with a little quip real quick. When in the history of you knowing me have I been helpful? Look, I'm just saying.

Not on this podcast, I'm a very nice person and I hope people know that. And if you don't know that, that's your own fucking problem. I'm a nice lady, okay? Yep. You do this thing sometimes where you talk about how nice you are, but then you you add an extra layer that that kind of takes away a layer. It's kind of a negative to a positive where you're like, if you don't know that, you can go straight to hell. And it's like, well, that doesn't, that, I understand what you're saying as someone

who knows you. But from the outside looking in, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that doesn't that doesn't that doesn't, that doesn't th, th, th, th, thi, tho, thi, thi, thi, th is thi, th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th is th is th is th is th is thi, that's that's that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that, that's that's that, that, that's that're saying as someone who knows you. Yeah. From the outside looking in, that doesn't, that doesn't help. Did you not see my IG story the other day was, no, it was my day. It was today I had a therapy session. I worked out. And I thank the Lord for my daily scripture. You niggas are in trouble. Yeah see but you know what it is it's like it's like if a rapper what you do is a lot like if a rapper had a

good rhyme going yeah and then and then ended it like a real good flow right like a thud da da da da da like you're rocking with it right and then in the last line he's like yeah I love you so to your head to your foot it's like, yeah, I love you so to your head to your foot It's like You had us you fully had us and then you you know, I mean I could have been head to toe but I said head to foot You could have been head to toe head to foot so I understand what you meant But I'm saying the way it sounds. Oh, I'm fully aware of how I sound, but then that's just funny to me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that's that's that's the that's that's the that's the the that. the that. the that. the that. that. that. that. that's that's that's that's that's to to to you meant But I'm saying the way it sounds. Oh, I'm fully aware of how I sound But then that's just funny to me like instead of saying I digress I say I digest Just to see who catches it Yeah, no, okay. I'm with you. I just I just I feel like in this this has been the one that I've looked forward to the most because this is the one where I feel like the audience that?? th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th th is th is the the th the thi thi the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is the the the thi is the thi the the thi thi thi thi the thi thi the thi thi thi the the thi the the thi because this is the one where I feel like the audience can hear me they can feel me and they can see me.

It's elitist. It's elitist. Y'all think that you're doing that much better because you are willing to pay more money for the regular shit. You know what? I have not been fair to you. I want you to make your points. Because I'm not been helping. It's not about the prices being more. I th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. I's. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th the thi. I never like paying more, especially if it's for the same thing. I know that these big box companies get all their sourced goods from the same like five places. I'm saying Target ends up being better because Walmart is too busy being chaotic. It's not necessarily about the prices. It's not even always about the product, okay? Because I've had plenty of things that I've bought from Target fall apart the th............ And, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, it, I's, I's, I's, th, I's, th, th, th, th, the, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. thea. thatea. thoooooooooooooooooooooooes. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the product, okay? Because I've had plenty of things that I've bought from Target fall apart immediately and then I had to return them.

That also happens. I'm just saying that like the levels of which we're getting too much in a Walmart, okay? Like the Walmart I went to when I was in college, we went to because we were bored. That is not a good clientele. You don't want a bunch of bored teenagers in your store just killing time, all right? It's gonna bring down the quality of the experience for other customers. It's not bringing down the quality of experience

because you know what I hate is when I'm gonna target and I see somebody calculating what's in their cart knowing they can't fucking pay for it.. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, th, thi, thi, thi, the, and the, and I's, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tooooooooooo, too, too, too, too, their, their, their, their, their cart knowing they can't fucking pay for it. That disrupts my quality of my time because it's like you never want to see people have to negotiate with the things that they need. Now this is the other thing about a Target. You're seeing people negotiate for things that they truly don't need. You don't need that other bathmat. You have a bathmat. You don't need a new one. You need a $30 fucking bathmat. The bathmat you have is fine. Just wash it. You don't need half of things in your cart when you get, because when you get

home from Target, you're always like, where am I going to put this shit? That's always what happens to come up from a target. Now as somebody who did go to Walmart when I was bored and has photos and has photos from being in at Walmart, from in college, when I was bored, what I found out is Walmart employees enjoy you putting on all the fishing gear and pretending to fish with your friends in the aisle. They'll take a picture of that. They'll let you hold onto the Daisy BB gun and put on all the hunting gear while you're pretending to hunt the singing deer that's mounted on this black in the hunting section on this country-ass

Walmart. Walmart knows what Walmart is. Walmart employees know if you come in it because like the number of times we thought that we were going to be asked to leave a Walmart because I was pretending to chase my friend with a chainsaw and they're like hey you want us to take a picture Yeah of the the the the the the the the th the th. the the the the the Walmart they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. Walmart. th. th. th. to be to be to be they. Walmart. Walmart's. Walmart's. to be. to be. to be. I I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I I's. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's the the toe. I'm toe. I'm toe. And t t t t t te. And. And. And. And. And. And. And, t t t toe. And. And. And. And toe. And. And toe. And toe. And to're like, hey, you want us to take a picture? Yeah, of course. Here's the camera. Thank you so much. Walmart knows what Walmart is. Nobody's going up in a Target and have a good time when they're bored.

Because guess what? Target closes too early to get that bored clientele. Because I'm going to tell you, we never walked out without buying something. You don't fuck around in a Walmart Walmart, the the the thethe Walmart, not buy anything. But Walmart employees are always like, yeah, okay. Well, Target on the other hand is like, hey, can I help you? No, bitch, you can't help me, okay? Let me put on all this hunting gear. You can't be getting upset about help.

It's a wet list. Listen, you're a black person. You've got people aggressively ask you if you needed assistance because they're trying to make sure you're not stealing. Bitch, I'm in pajama pants. No, I'm not stealing because there's nothing at the bottom the hole in the stolen goods. Oh, but if if that happens to me, I just put them to work. If somebody rolls up on me and they're like, oh, hey, do you need some help? And they're they're they're they're they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. th. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. th. I'm. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm. me up and down, try to make sure I'm not stealing anything. I'm like, oh, thank goodness you're here. I'll take up their entire shift. I don't give it damn. Canceal all of my shows. I'm in this Walmart.

I'll be with me all day. I'll be like, what do you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. thin. thin. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm, thin. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, than. I'll, than. I'll, th. I'll, than. I'll, th. I'll, th. I'm, tho. I'm, tho. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, th. I, th. I'll, th. I'll, th. I'll, th. I'll, th. I'll, th. I'll, th. th. th. th. th. than. than. than. than. I'll. th. I'll. th yellow bell pepper and an orange bell pepper? And they'll be like, I'm like, let's look it up. Let's look, let's Google it together. Like, that's more devious. Yeah. No, I, hey, if you, if you want to roll with me, you roll with me. I've done that before. I was like makeup and different stuff in there, like makeup and like different accessories and earrings and shit. And there are two women in there with their children and they are obviously stealing.

And they are obviously stealing. To anyone who's ever worked in a retail store, they are obviously fucking stealing. Truly. They got stuff on the kids, they're, I don't know if they're starting a business. They're obviously fucking stealing. But the guy who ran the place, the guy who ran the place, him and his wife, anytime I would touch something. So he's following me through the store while I'm watching two women with their children obviously fucking seal. So I was like you know what I'm running interference I'm gonna let these bitches rob this man blind so what I started doing is I walk through the store and I would just

take something off and then just drop it on the ground. Or I would take something and take it off and then just drop it on the ground. Mm. Or I would take something and take it off and then put it back in a different place. Because he was adjust, he was anything I looked at something, he was adjusted. And I just went, are you following me? But now he tried to act like he didn't speak English. Oh, niggins, you don't speak English. These bitches are stealing. We're about to be a problem in here.

So I just started moving shit, I'm dropping stuff on the floor, and then I'm watching them continue to openly steal. Dropping things in a bag, dropping things in a stroller, handing something to their child that they can put in the stroll. There's a family of crime. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?

Listen to the weekly show with on my end of Walmart versus Target is there's too much, there's almost too much, we can't even fit it into an hour and a half show if we were to do that of the drawbacks of Walmart and I would say I would refer people. Give me three. For lack of a better word clientele All right, there's been quite a fight and quite Quite a quite a theft and quite quite a quite a overall chaotic situation I remember there are times that I'm I'm literally going in Walmart to get in and get out. I just got my grapes. I got whatever fruits Whatever v veggies I wanted, and I'm just watching something

to happen down the, because you also made the place too big, because now the Walmart as a whole is a city, and cities are going to have their levels of crime and their levels of chaos, right? Okay. Then I think that even though it's cheap, the price point is still not fantastic for what the thing actually is. So you made the point. Because the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. the place. th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. that, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. I, th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I that, that, the that, the that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that,'s cheap, the price point is still not fantastic for what the thing actually is. So you made the point- But why don't we out here rolling back prices, what you mean? Because what they do is a, it's a tactic where they tell you they've rolled it back,

but you never actually saw that initial price in the first place, right? So they'll be like, we've rolled back prices from 899 to 699, but then when you actually look at the thing and you pay attention, it was never 899 in the store. They just marked it up so they can mark it down, which is the price that they wanted to pay the entire time. Oh yeah, I had a thing, I think the add-ons are actually negatives, okay? The some of the photo shoots, some of the extra sandwich

businesses that are inside of Wal-Mart actually decrease the value for me. You know what I saw a Walmart today? I saw Clare's in a Walmart. And I was like, decrease the value for me rather than increase it. I saw a Walmart today. I thought Clare's in a Walmart and I was like, shout out to Clare's. They're like, we're not going out of business. Fuck y'all. These malls are dying, but these Walmarts, thriving.

Yeah. Even though Walmart sells the little accessory nonsense that a Clare's has, it doesn't have the depth of the accessory nonsense that Ecclars has. Also, you got your daughter whether you're, well, anyway, yeah, let her get her ears pierce. She's nine. I feel like Target has just enough, okay? They have just enough that I can get what I need, and it's not crazy. I don't have to go through a bunch of aisles. I actually don't need as much help.

Target has a system in place that I don't think Walmarts have, or at least not all of them, where you can walk up to a little like kiosk type thing on certain aisles, you type, you type, you type in what you need and they will tell you what aisle it's on in what section and that's something that Walmart has not had. I thought Target just has the price scanners I don't even know what you're talking about. So Walmart also has the price scanners but if you if you go up to certain sections in a target this is in a lot of the target's in New York City and you just type in what you need it's the same as the website as the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the website the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to to the to the to the the the the to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to the to to the to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. they. they. the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the but it's for the store. I'll tell you that you type it in, it'll tell you like aisle five, row two, whatever. The thing is it's easier for a New York Walmart to do, I mean, a York Target to do that because a New York Target only has five items in it. I tried to get shoes out of a New York Target and I was like, I'm try to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get the new. to get the new. the new. the new. the new. th. th. the new. I thi. I th. thi. I th. I thi. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. thi. I'll. thi. I'll. thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll th. I'll th. I'll the the the the the the the the the thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll thi. I'll ti. I'll ti. I'll try. I'll thi. I'll thiole. I'll was literally in a I tried to go get and I was like I need some new shoes and I

was like I was in a hurry and I couldn't find a DSW that was close to where I was like you know what a Tarjay a Targot let me walk in this beach and try to find something to keep my feet off the ground and I got to the shoe the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tree try I'm try I'm try try I the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tree tree. tree. try. try. try. try. I try. I try. I try. try. I try. I try. I try. I try. I try. I was to the shoe section and there was literally only 20 pairs of fucking shoes. And I looked at the girl and said, where are the rest of the shoes? Because all of the targets in New York, in the city, like in Manhattan, or like abbreviated, reduced down. Yeah, that's very true actually. That's... Why even make the store?

There's only 20 pairs of shows in here. Where the fuck is the rest of the store? So if you... So that's like, I'm like, I hate... Do you know what I do if I want to go to a target? I go 25 minutes out to fucking flushing. Because it's a whole... It's got the big red balls in front to make you don't drive through that bitch and steal their TVs. It has whole...

What'd you think them red balls was for? It's just not somebody from traveling. I never, I honestly never thought about what they were for and this makes perfect sense. I'd rather than be for that. That's exactly what they're for. Yeah. That's exactly what they're for. th. their they're for. they're for they're for their they're for they're for their they're for their they're for they're for their their they're for their they're for their their their they're for their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the big box stores because like Walmart some of them will have those pillars in front of them too It's so you don't drive in their fucking store also not even to steal their shit It's just so you don't drive in the store. Mm-hmm because it's happened enough now right where they're like hey, how do we stop this? But make it aesthetically pleasing? Um, put giant balls in front of the store that will will will.... th. th. th. th. th. th. So, th. So, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, th. that's, that's, th. th. thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's why thi. It's why that's why that's why that's why, that's so that's so that that that thi. So, thi. So, thi. So, thi. It's so so thi. So, put giant balls in front of the store that will destroy most vehicles if they drive into them. So, I understand that Walmart is the waffle house of stores. I'm fully aware. I, I appreciate that. I'm fully aware of what she is, who she is and what she's doing.

Yeah. But if I'm trying to furnish an entire apartment, I had to literally buy dishes, cups, you know, everything that you have to have as a person when you live indoors, right? You gotta have a TV, you gotta have hangars to put your clothes up. All these things. I furnished my whole apart. I got not furnished, but like I've, I guess it's not furniture. What's the, what's the, if it's not furniture, what's it going you're like putting stuff in an apartment like the pots and the pans and the, you know, what's that? I guess you, I mean, I th thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the th. the the the the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. My. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the whole. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. Right. Yeah. I spent, I had two buggies full, I might have spent $400. It's $300, $400 to get everything I needed. I bought an air mattress because I had nothing in this apartment. Yeah, yeah.

I spent $300. I know if I would have bought those same things. Mm-hmm. Out of target, I would have spent twice as much. Okay, so how about this? We're going to kick it to you, the listener, and this is, these are the last things that I'll say before I rest it with all of you. My last and final, you know, check made of a position. I understand that some people like Walmart for the entertainment value and everything and for the price point, but you need only go to people of Walmart to see what I'm talking about.

That's your only. That's not my only. I'm just saying it's my last. I definitely can concede that there are targets that might as well not even be stores. There are targets where there are six things on sale and only two of them are here. But yes. I think that you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're leaning, you're their, you're, you're, you're their, you're their, you're their, you're their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, you're their, you're their, you're their sale and only two of them are here. But I think that you're leaning one way or the other. We're either leaning towards these drawbacks of the super center, which yes, it has everything, but like at what cost, how long you're going to be in there, no one is helpful, or not no one, but usually no one. Or the tiny store that hopefully has an entire section of the thing that you'd think they'd have. Like I remember one time I went to one of the tiny ones and they didn't have, I don't think they had any mouthwash at all. And I was like, okay, well then don't make this a pharmacy.

Like a pharmacy, like, th. Right. You have the toothbrushes, you have the floss, don't do this now, right? Getting the toothpaste and you don't have mouthwash, like who lives this way? Like that's why, like, I went to like two different Manhattan Targets and I was like, and I hate to ever say this, but a plague upon both your houses is really how I felt when I walked out of the fucking store so I know oh I have to go to a target in Queens. Mm-hmm. I have to go to where the people are, meaning the suburbs. I have to go to the target in the fuck, and they target in the suburbs. Yeah, just like I found like the H-Marts that are in Manhattan, like H-mart. It was just, it was just, it was just sold the to-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s-a-s-s-s, the the the-s-s-s, th-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s, tha-s-s-s-s-s. ta-s. ta-s. ta-s. ta-sa-sa-sa-sa-s. ta-s. tha-s. I-s. I- do this to me, but I realize that New York does not have the super Hmart. Because the super Hmart? Yeah, the super Hmart is amazing. It's a it's a Croger. It's a croaker. It's a croa and I'm just like, yes, come through. Come through. H. Super H. Mart. It's me. I'm out here task. And I'm just like, thro-C. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. th. they. they. th. th. they. th. th. th. th. they. they. they. the super. the super H. the super H. the super H. the super. the super. the super. the super. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. C. C. C. C. It. C. I. I. C. C. I. I. I. C. It's. It's. It's. C. It's. It's. It's. Come. Come. Come. Come th. tasting shit E-ma we out here eating things okay once they see my cart now we walk in hand in hands through the store right she's helping me get the good kimchi like oh you

making kimchi pancakes well that means you got to get the older kimchi because you need more than fermentation we having conversations we're the son is in school. I hope. I mean I'm they what I mean? Super Hmart. I appreciate all of you listening. We appreciate you being listeners. We appreciate your opinions. I felt that. I felt that. Don't do that. I felt it.

You don't think I felt that? Huh? You don't think I felt it? Well, you just did what you did? We want you to tell us what you think. Are you team Walmart, team Target? Do you go for the Supercenter or the little quick self-checkout experience that I guess targets are doing? It is really wild. It's like it's like it might as well, some of these targets might as well be a CVS. But I still think that they offer my life more stability than the Walmarts did did. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. I that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's they. I's they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. It's is. I I I I I I they. I they. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's they. I's they. they. I's th. th. th. today. today. today. today. today. th. th. today. th. th. the th. the todthey offer my life more stability than the Walmarts did, okay? That's what I just, I can't listen. It's very rare as a child that I would see a closed Walmart.

Yeah, but things need to close. No, no, no, no, no. I mean, clothes isn't like shut down. Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I thought you meant for the night. I mean, I think it all I think it all I think I think I think I think I think I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I th. I th. I thin, I th. I th. I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I think. I think. think. think. think. think. think. think. think. think. think. think. think. th. th. th. th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th it all, I think honestly. Any 24-hour place is just asking for trouble. I mean, we've all heard that nothing good happens after midnight. Yeah. Unless you're in a target in Gainesville, Georgia. I feel like this is my tomato soup. You know what I mean? Because a lot of people are going to be like,

what do you? Why are you associating yourself? Associating yourself in the Walmart and I will tell you, I, one of my favorite things to do on the road is to go to Walmart. So we want you to check out between your friends and you, how you feel about this. Open up this conversation to the people in your life. Maybe open it up in a Walmart or a target, you know? And what I don't want you to do is don't be uppity about it. Okay? Don't judge people. Don't be. Don't be like, hey, listen, what is your preference? Okay? Don't Walmart shame people. Yeah, yeah. And I want people out there to value the self. to. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their their their their their their their th. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. tea. tea. tea. their their their their their their their their want people out there to value themselves. I want you to value yourself and I want you to take care of yourself.

I want you to ask what what would be an easier day for you, you know, because maybe you are in a closer proximity to a Walmart, who knows? But if you are looking to check us out on the social socials. You can find me at Josh Johnson Comedy on Instagram. TikTok and YouTube. I also have a podcast called the Josh Johnson Show where I tell stories and chat with friends. And then, if you're looking for Dulce, I'm in these truth. Um, sometimes. Yeah, I've got my stuff on my socials. I've got some shows coming up. Listen, uh, we're just here to be as helpful as we possibly can. And, um, call your mom. And, their their their their their their their their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tell the tell tell the tell the tell the tell to tell to to to tell to to to to to to to to to to to to're just here to be as helpful as we possibly can and call your mama and if you can't call your daddy. You know what? Phone a friend,

see how your friend's doing. Check on your strong friend. That's what I'm saying. And have a good weekend. Bye. Bye-ee! Suckers! Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching The Daily Show, wherever you get your podcast. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. This has been a Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Survivor 47 is here, which means we're bringing you a brand new season of the only official

survivor podcast on fire. And this season we are joined by fan favorite and Survivor 46 runner-up, Charlie Davis to bring you even further inside the action. Charlie, I'm excited to do this together. Thanks, Jeff. So excited to be here, and I can't wait to bring you inside the mind of a survivor player for season 47. Listen to On Fire, the official Survivor podcast starting September 18th, wherever you get your podcast.