The Daily Show: Ears Edition - TDS Time Machine | Baseball

Episode Date: March 29, 2025

Baseball's back! Celebrate opening day with The Daily Show's coverage of past times in America's pastime.  Jon Stewart talks his beloved Mets ripping out his heart, imagines Mr. Met firing their manager and takes a look at politicians pulling the local team flip-flop. Jon discusses anti-immigration implications of an Arizona  All-Star Game with Al Madrigal. Mets legend Mookie Wilson sits down with Jon to talk about legacy. Roy Wood Jr. flies straight back to the studio after watching the Cubs win the World Series. Ronny Chieng joins Roy to argue the merits of baseball. Trevor Noah reports on Aaron Judge's record breaking home run, and talks their latest lockout.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. I don't know what you did this week, and I hope you had a nice time. What did I do this week? I went out, took the kids out to the park for a little bit, and had a nice dinner with my wife. We had a lovely time. And then on Sunday, I had my...

Oh, is it my heart? ...taken out of my chest and... And then eaten in front of me. My beloved New York Mets, after I went through the trouble all day Saturday of teaching a 3-year-old the Meet the Mets song. Meet the Mets. Meet the Mets. Is that good, Daddy? Is it good? Love me?

I want the third stanza done with heart, boy, with heart! The Mets lost in a historic collapse. I don't know if you saw this picture on the cover of the Post. It turns out, yeah, it turns out the New York Post cameras can take a picture of my soul. But it's not over yet. Apparently, everybody thinks it's over, but if we can just get the earth to reverse rotation, this thing can be played again.

So there you go, New York Mets. Motherfuckers. First, before we get into anything, I have a question for you I'm a fucking bitch. I'm a fucking bitch. First, before we get into anything, I have a question for you. You ever been fired? I've been fired. I've been fired a lot. I've been fired. I've been fired from bakeries that I worked at.

I've been fired from women's clothing stores. I was once fired by my brother. My brother fired me from awards. But one thing that's never... I was fired by Strip-A-Gram once. One thing that's never happened to me is that I've been fired at 3 o'clock in the morning, 3000 miles away from where I live. Willie Randolph, the New York Mets manager, my beloved Mets. This guy, okay, the Mets suck.

Fine. But they could have fired Willie Randolph at any point over the last year. So what they do is they wait before he takes a trip to Los Angeles. They fly him all the way out to Los Angeles. He wins the game and then they fire him that night at three o'clock in the morning. You don't get, when you get a call at three o'clock in the morning, that's for sex. That's not for being fired. He did not deserve that.

It is classless. Here's how bad it is. This is the New York Post. Tiger Woods. They didn't even have time to put Willie Randolph being fired. Classless. I mean, maybe they flew him out to Los Angeles because they thought, well, we're going to fire him.

He should at least get his frequent flyer miles. I don't know. Bastardos. And this is the worst part. We have a tape of the call of him being fired. You cannot believe who they got to fire him. Hey Willie... Hey, Willie, it's Mr. Met. Good morning. Oh, and guess what? You're fired. So pack up your crap, get the fuck out of the clubhouse,

give me your shit. What, you want to meet the Mets? Why don't you meet Mr. Met? I'll meet you in the fucking parking lot, you bum. Oh, another thing, keep your dirty mitts off of Mrs. Met, you son of a bitch. No disrespect. All due respect.

Forget about it. How you doing? Not right. Willie didn't deserve this. No disrespect, all due respect. Forget about it how you don't. Not right. Willie didn't deserve this. Whoo! World Series is Wednesday night. Tampa Bay Rays facing the Phillies

in the World Series starting Wednesday night. Both these teams. And this is the key part from crucial swing states. This is gonna put the candidates... in a bit of a pickle. Tampa Bay, of course, from Florida, and the Philadelphia Phillies are from the festering sore on the end of my taint.

I don't think that's right. Who wrote this? Who? I don't think that's right. Who wrote this? Mr. Met! Damn you! Obviously, very upset that the Mets did not get into the World Series. Now, obviously, the candidates don't want to anger people by taking sides in this World Series.

What would be the best way to navigate these treacherous waters. I'm a white socks thing but let me say that since the white socks loss. I'm going to root for the Phillies now. So when you see a white socks fan Sean love of the race. And the show some love back. We're on the something right here. ["The Local Sports Franchise"]

Et tu, Messiah? The Local Sports Franchise, Pander? Come on, man! You've got to do better than that. You know something? I smell a Mac attack. I think I may have detected a little pattern with Senator Obama. It's pretty simple, really.

When he's campaigning in Philadelphia, he roots for the Phillies. Then when he's campaigning in Tampa Bay, he shows love to the Rays. That guy's an ass-****. No offense there, Senator McCain, but once you said a guy's a terrorist, you call him a fair-weather fan. raise. No offense there senator game but once you said a guy's a terrorist you call the fair weather fan that really hurt.

Unless you've got an attack had to go with it. Barack Obama says he swore allegiance to Tampa Bay then why does he pal around with this fanatic from Philadelphia? Barack Obama wrong on baseball wrong for America You got to get a pretty early in the morning to sneak a sports flip-flop past the McCain palin team Tampa Bay Rays? That was good. It tells me that the people in this area know a little something about turning an underdog

into a victor. Philly fans, you do know all about turning an underdog into a victor. Red Sox fans know how to turn an underdog into a Victor free team Panda she's done it the triple the triple crown been over one year since Arizona governor Jan Brewer signed SB 1070, a controversial anti-immigration bill that some call tantamount to racial profiling, into law with some unintended consequences.

Baseball, nearly 30% Hispanic, is a flashpoint for protest. Baseball's all-star game scheduled for Phoenix next summer may hang in the balance. That's the only way in this country that we decide who gets home field advantage in the World Series. Unless someone, you know, flips a quarter. Anyway, for more on the impact of SB 1070 on the All-Star Game, we go to Chase Field in Phoenix, Arizona, with senior Latino correspondent, Al Madrigal. Al. Al Madrigal. Al. What a night for baseball, John. History in the making. Little hot. Could be that it's 127 degrees in Arizona or I got a case of baseball fever.

Al, you're supposed to be covering the protests about the law in Arizona, not enjoying the game. I thought the Latino community was furious about this. Oh, yes, right. Very furious muy furioso. Al, so are there protests? Are you covering the protests? Sure. Yes. It's...

Aw, come on, John! It's baseball, man! I mean, I'd protest if it was any other sport, but we love baseball! It's the only sport a Latino can dream of playing in America. We're too short for basketball. We're too small for football. Too smart to strap on a pair of ice skates and let a Canadian beat the shit out of us. So... So...

So... Besides dog whispering, baseball is... Besides dog whispering, baseball is... Baseball is all Latinos have left. Baseball is all Latinos have left. Baseball is all Latinos have left. So Latinos love baseball and dog whispering so much, they'll look past any injustice done to them.

Are you familiar with the Battle of Chavez Ravine? During the 1950s, 3,800 Mexican immigrants were literally whipped from their homes in Los Angeles so the newly relocated Dodgers could have a stadium. And guess what they call those people today? Season ticket holders. That is incredible. Hold on a second. Hey, beer!

So Adrian Gonzalez is doing well and he doesn't want to miss the game? Is that it? What's your excuse? I don't even know what you're talking about, man. I'm talking about how you called the vendor for a beer, and then... and then just apparently took it from some f***ing guy that was standing over there. Anyway.

I didn't realize. I'm sorry, Joe, I didn't realize this guy was right here. Last year, Al, you were, last year, last year, wait, this is really important. Last year you were really angry about this issue. Roll the tape. And that's why my madrigal mystery bore of 2010 is Sex of the City 2. If I may, John, just a quick personal message for Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig.

Arizona's law is racist, and having the All-Star Game near is total bullsh-t. Thanks, John. All right, thank you, Al. How do you explain that, Al? I don't know. I like the first sex in the city. I just thought the sequel was unnecessary.

Why mess with perfection? So, Al, there's going to be zero acknowledgement of SB 1070 at tonight's All-Star Game? I wouldn't say that. Players are showing solidarity in their own subtle ways. Beneath each eye, many have decided to wear thick black marks, symbolizing the dark turn in Arizona's politics. Al, baseball players always do that. Ah, but they're also going to grab their balls and spit.

I believe they do that as well. No but this time they're gonna mean it. Look you can't keep Latinos from playing baseball just like the ghost from the cornfield in that movie with Kevin Costner said if you build it they will come and by they I mean hordes of Latinos. Thank you, Al. Al Madrigal, everybody. We'll be right back.

Welcome back, my guys, tonight on New York Mets Legend. His new book is called Mookie, Life, Baseball, and the 86 Mets. Please welcome to the program Mookie Wilson! And honor to see you here. Alright great. Thank you for being here. Thanks for having me. This is really the last time in many years that I can actually say that to a New York man. But rough times, huh? It's been some rough times. This really was, you know, you're right about 86. There is something truly indelible

about a championship season that makes it worthy of remembrance. What was it about the 86 team when you guys won the World Series? Besides the dramatic fashion, if you wanted it. what was it about the 86 team when you guys won the world series be besides the dramatic fashion. I wanted it I think the characters I think that we're a

group of individuals that weren't afraid to be themselves and I think any more that this was actually more of that yes but you were you know the 86 team had dot good and Darrell strawberry Keith Hernandez yes Gary Carter but you were a beacon

of maturity in that. Oh, that's good. Don't you think? You were the one guy everybody loved and nobody ever worried about. You always thought Keith Hernandez, at some point, six in the morning, somebody's gonna be like, where's Keith?

Mookie Wilson never had that issue. No, I think the team, we had this group over here that was really outgoing. A lot of people called him the scumbunch, you know. Then we had this other group over here that was really, you know, Gary Carter's, you know, Ron Darling's, guys like that. Didn't have those guys in the middle,

you know, like myself and Rafael Santana, that kind of, you know, kept it all together. And that chemistry. Yes. And it brings up an interesting... So, everybody is talking about this Donald Sterling, this relationship between a racist owner. Sports really is an unusually, almost paternal situation

with the owner. They can ship you out to another city. Do the players feel that relationship? I think it's always going to be that weird relationship between players and management, knowing that management does have the last word. Sometimes it doesn't matter how well you play, it's all about relationship between the player and ownership. Now this basketball situation is really, really different. We have a lot of racists from Mars,

and here he owns a team that's over 80% black. That's kind of weird. That is kind of weird. But it's always you find in these leagues, the owner is typically white. The athletes, typically African-American, the athletes who are African-American had to fight to be allowed to play and even now still have to fight for rights. This idea that okay, you know, you're allowed to leave after

seven years, but you have to put in this amount of time. Do you think this is, could be a turning point in that relationship? I don't think so. I think that sports has survived. I mean, over the years, as much as we've tried to mess baseball up, we haven't, with strikes and all that. The game will survive. I got thinking, you can make all the rules you want to,

but until you change the attitudes of people, you're gonna have this kind of idiocy. Right, right, right. No matter what you do, it's just gonna happen. As a player, how do you handle that, you know, these guys are in the midst of a playoff run. Yeah. Now you played in New York.

There was a tremendous amount of distraction. A tremendous amount of media. They're the same in Los Angeles. Is it even possible for an athlete at that high level to still compete with this type of emotion under the surface? Well, first of all, I wanna say that want to say that athletes deal with pressure every day. Every day they go out on the field, it's all about what you do that day.

And this is no different. They're not playing for the honor. They're playing for their own self-respect. And I've heard things about, well, should the team boycott and not play? That serves no real purpose. I mean, it would defeat the purpose of you being there, playing basketball at the NBA level, that's a great, great honor. And to let some idiot, you know,

not let you fulfill the potential that your team has, I think you'd be doing yourself a disservice in the league itself. Do you see what I mean about you having the maturity? Look at me, I'm ready to fly off the handle. Just walk away from the game and you brought me back. You know, it's so. Here's what I think should happen.

Yes, okay. The Clippers rally around this. Yeah. They play unbelievable basketball for the next month. They win the NBA championship. Yeah. And in the locker room, in the jubilation, the trophy is handed to

them Donald Sterling is right there and they get the tallest guy let's go with Blake Griffith he's about 6'11 and he just holds the trophy up like this and Donald Sterling just has to... can't get it. And done. They don't let him have it. Are you still able to get together with some of the fellas and reminisce about it, you know, tragically Gary Carter of College Pass away, great character guy, are you able to get together and still sort of revert back to form from the 80s and have a great time together? We don't want to go back.

No, I know. We don't want to. But we do get together and when we do his, there's one big reunion and we talk a lot and we rely a little bit too. You know. That's what reminiscing is all about. That's what it's all about. Yeah.

And who would have thought that that would be the last championship the Mets ever won. It, uh. Well, it's an absolute pleasure to see you and to have you here on the show. Get yourself Mookie, one of the greats. Mookie Wilson, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you.

["The Cursed"] But first, let's start with something we don't get to say often enough. Some good news out of Chicago. The longest drought in the history of American sports is over. The curse is dead. Chicago erupting overnight.

Thousands celebrating in the streets. The Cubs win the World Series! Oh yes, yes. You know, before last night, I had almost forgotten what joy looks like. Everybody in America has been so tense and grim. Even Halloween this year, people were walking around like,

well, zombies. I do feel bad for the Indians, though. Defeated on their own land again. Although, although most Native Americans are probably okay that this guy lost. This needs to change, people. This needs to change. One thing I really loved last night was seeing all the news and the pictures of

Cubs fans celebrating. They were so happy. They were so relieved. You know, they were, they were so, look, I mean, like, look at this guy. Wait, can you zoom? Is that, is that Roy Wood Jr.? You're damn right it is. Oh, it's Roy Wood, oh, it's Roy Wood Jr. everybody.

Roy Wood Jr. Our number one Cubs fan. Oh, Troy Wood, oh, Troy Wood Cooley, everybody. Good day, everybody. Good day, everybody. Our number one Cubs fan. Fresh from Cleveland, man. I can't believe it, Roy was actually at the game. I can't believe you came to work. I can't believe you're still wearing the same robe.

This is amazing, Roy. You are back in New York, Roy. You can put the sign down, man. Uh-uh, uh-uh. You sound just like United Airlines. Captain gonna tell me I need to sit down and put the sign down, man. Uh-uh, uh-uh. You sound just like United Airlines. Captain gonna tell me I need to sit down and put the sign away. Not tonight. Fly the plane, Sully.

Okay, Roy, can we just talk about the game real quick, man? You must, like, for real, you must have had an emotional night. Yeah, I mean, you know, dude, it was grown-ass men brought to tears. You got to remember, dude, Cup fans, like, this wasn't just for them. This was for the generations,

three generations of ancestors who never lived to see the Cubs win the series. So then, if it was for generations, who were you there for? I was there for myself. I'm the only Cubs fan in my family. Yeah, actually, no, but actually now that you bring that up, you're from Alabama, so how did you become a Cubs fan?

Because it came on TV. Look, in Alabama, look, in the 80s, only two baseball teams came on TV, the Cubs and the Braves, and I couldn't watch the Braves because they came on at night, and my daddy wanted to watch Airwolf. What you know about Airwolf? I actually loved Airwolf.

By the way, I hate to bring this up, but what is that smell? Oh man, it's the lucky robe. I ain't washed it in a year. It was riding all over the game, man. I had it on last night, fellowshiping with complete strangers. Plus, when that storm hit, this the best part, man. That rainstorm started coming around the ninth inning.

This robe sucked up all the water and I brought it back as a souvenir. Look at this right here, man. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! That is authentic game seven precipitation.

Oh, yeah, man, I'm ringing this out. I'm gonna sell this for a grand and outs on eBay, man. This is concentrated victory. Boy, go on, hit you some of that. Hit that. No, I'm good, Roy. I'm good. All right, you lost, man.

All right, congratulations, Roy. Roy Wood Jr., everybody. Roy Wood Jr., these fans. You guys are the best. The Sun is out and summer sports are in full swing, which means it's time for another edition of I Apologize for Talking While You Were Talking. -♪ Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, who because I got my man Ronnie Chang with me and he is psyched to talk baseball, aren't you Ronnie? I hate baseball.

That's the spirit. You know Ronnie, baseball is America's national pastime. Oh really? I thought it was racism. Well, lucky for you, this week's Big Story has both. Relief pitcher Josh Hader made his first appearance on the mound for the Milwaukee Brewers since Saturday, since controversial tweets from when he was 17 resurfaced during the All-Star game last week. After giving an emotional apology for those racially charged and homophobic social media posts on Friday,

Hader was warmly greeted by the fans at Miller Park on Saturday, given a standing ovation when he came in to pitch the top of the seventh inning in a game against the Dodgers. Now that was a great thing to see, Ronnie. ovation when he came in to pitch the top of the seventh inning in a game against the Dodgers. Now that was a great thing to see Ronnie. Josh Hader busted for racist tweets, apologizes, and now the Milwaukee fans are showing forgiveness. I don't know man, it kind of looks like some people are clapping for the racism. Okay well we don't know, let's just be honest, we don't know why they were clapping. Sometimes you just join in on something because everyone else is doing it,

like the wave or cocaine. What? No, ill. Who's doing the wave? I think that laid him off easy because he can throw a ball really fast. Yeah, that's how sports work. The better you are, the more shit you can get away with.

Josh Hader is an all-star, which means he's so good, he can bounce back from bad tweets. Ron Artest was so good, they let him punch fans in the face. And Shaq was so good, he got away with Kazam! That's a whole other thing, bro. That's a whole other thing. Okay, hang on, hang on. So you'd be okay if LeBron James went around punching babies? Up to three babies, I'd be fine with that.

But, hey, let's move on to a lighter story. Well, Millennial Night was the talk of the town in Riverwalk Stadium in Montgomery. You might remember us telling you about some of the backlash this promotion got on social media. The first 100 fans through the gate received a participation ribbon just for showing up with super food options such as avocados and selfie stations.

And as if that wasn't enough, the biscuits also provided nap pods for sleepy fans. Ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, man, selfie stations, you've got to admit, Ronnie. This baseball team really stuck it to those millennials. No, they didn't. They just accidentally made baseball a thousand times better. Yeah, I get to eat avocados and take a nap.

Just take away the game, and it's a perfect afternoon. And-and also, that wasn't a real millennial experience, okay? If it was, the fans would have left the game with $100,000 in student debt. Yeah. Yeah. But rest well, millennials.

You aren't the only young people having problems at baseball games. When it comes to baseball etiquette, one Chicago Cubs fan strikes out. Watch the first base coach flip a ball to a kid in the front row. The little boy drops the ball, it rolls back a row. Oh, oh, that man, he scoops it up and hands it to the... Wait....woman next to him. What? Since there's no crying in baseball,

the kid watched as the adult continued to gloat. No, no. Pro tip. If you want a ball, you don't steal it from a kid. You go to Walmart and you steal it like a goddamn adult. This story makes me so mad, Ronnie. Really? Because... it just proves how boring baseball is. The most interesting thing that happened

was a ball that went out of bounds. On. Ronnie, Ronnie, look, no matter what you think of baseball, we can both agree, this guy is an asshole. No, that video's totally out of context. Deadspin reported that that guy everyone hates actually gave that same kid a ball earlier. Well, but still, the kid could have had a second ball.

Now he's only got one ball. He's walking around like Lance Armstrong. I don't like that guy. Oh, my. I don't like that. He got two balls. But that guy only took the second ball so he could give it to another kid. So not only is he not an asshole,

he's like baseball Jesus. Yeah, he gave gifts to children and we crucified him for it. All we had to do was wait for the whole story. Isn't sports more fun when you wait five minutes for all the facts to make an informed decision instead of reacting to everything with blind passion? Uh...

Yeah. Thank you so much for coming in. My real partner, Michael Kosta, will be back next week. Thank God. Roddy Chang, Rod with Judy, everybody. We'll be right back. -♪ Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Starting with a major milestone in the world of baseball, the only sports that's somehow better on radio. Baseball is a game that treats its records with reverence. You know, all of them from Cal Ripken Jr's

more than 2,600 consecutive games played to Joe DiMaggio's 56 game hitting streak to Derek Jeter's record of being the only successful guy ever to be named Derek. But no stat is more revered than the home run. And last night, Yankees outfielder, Aaron Judge, smashed his name into the record books. With the swing of his mighty bat,

Yankee superstar, Aaron Judge, slugged his way into history. There it goes, showing into history. There it goes! Sowing into history at 62! It took until the 161st game of the season, but number 99 has finally etched his name in the record books. Aaron Judge passes the great Roger Maris to break the record for most home runs in a single season by an American League player.

Ball was caught by Corey Youmans of Dallas, a vice president at Fisher Investments. He said he hasn't decided what he's gonna do with the souvenir, which could be worth a couple of million dollars. Well, there's a feel-good story for you. I'm glad things are finally working out for that executive at an investment firm. That's what the game is all about.

Good for you, buddy. Good for you. But yeah, huge congratulations to Aaron Judge, right? With just one game left to go in the season, he broke the American League home run record set by Roger Maris all the way back in 1961. Think about it, 1961. That is a long ass time for a record to stand. I mean, back in 1961, you understand how long ago that was?

America didn't have a Voting Rights Act and abortion was illegal, very different times. Now, to be clear, this is just the American League home run record, right? Not the all time record. But some people think it should be. Because everyone who's above Aaron Judge on the list was busted for taking performance enhancing drugs.

And whether you like it or not, this is a complicated issue. Because every player, whether they took steroids or not, has some advantage over players from other eras. You know, like Babe Ruth. He didn't have access to modern medicine. Yeah, if he pulled a muscle, the team doctor would be like, here, smoke this entire pack of cigarettes. If that doesn't work, I'll prescribe you some asbestos.

Go on out there, buddy. You know, if I'm being honest though, I don't know why we celebrate home runs in the first place. Yeah, because to me, all that happened is that you just lost the ball. Yeah, and now we gotta get a new ball. That's like what, $10 with 62 homers? That shit adds up, Aaron.

And I don't know if you heard, but America's 31 trillion in debt. We shouldn't be handling this shit. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it.

We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it.

We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. We can't afford it. we can keep using it. Those people are the real heroes. I'm really fun at parties. (*audience laughs*) (*upbeat music*) Spring is on its way in America,

and you know what that means. Sunny days, flowers blooming, eating your weight in Claritin. But there's one spring tradition that is unfortunately getting canceled. For the first time in more than a quarter century, Major League Baseball is canceling games over a labor dispute.

The calendar dictates that we're not going to be able to play the first two series of the regular season, and those games are officially canceled. That's 91 games so far. Economics are at the heart of it. Major League Baseball saw revenues go from around 8 billion to nearly 11 billion right before the pandemic. Yet player salaries went down slightly for four straight years. And of the four major American sports, baseball has the lowest minimum salary at around 570,000. No, no, don't cancel the baseball games.

How else will I get to spend $45 on a hot dog that's a little too dry? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. The MLB's canceling games because the players and the league cannot agree on who gets to share the money. Yes. And I'll be honest with you, I was shocked that baseball players' minimum pay

is less than all the other leagues, especially considering that this sport brings in $11 billion. And yes, I know $570,000 is a lot of money. It is a lot of money. But when you think about it from the player's point of view, think about how long a baseball game is. What does that 500,000 break down to?

It's like what, $4 an hour? And by the way, please remember this. I know a lot of people go like, I hate the sport, but don't remember that when this happens, a lockout doesn't just affect the players. It affects everyone who works in and around the game, like the people who work at the stadium, the people who work just outside the stadium, right?

It affects the umpires, the guys selling beer, the security guard who tackles the naked guys who run out onto the field. Yeah, in fact, just to pay the bills, Mr. Met has already had to start an OnlyFans account. It's sad, it's so sexy. Everyone's being very alarmist about this, all right? Dude, this is America. As though they're gonna start baseball. It's gonna sexy. Everyone's being very alarmist about this, all right? Dude, this is America.

As though they're gonna stop baseball. It's gonna come back. Of course they're gonna find an agreement. Oh, what's the alternative? They're just gonna never play baseball again? Of course it's gonna happen. This is like a, it's like an encore at a Billy Joel concert.

You know he's gonna play piano, man. Just calm the f*** down. Just wait. There's no patience here in America. We love baseball, but we don't like patience, which is ironic, because it's the game you need the most patience for, because it's weight. There's no patience here in America. We love baseball, but we don't like patience, which is ironic, because it's the game you need the most patience for, because it's long. Explore more shows from The Daily Show Podcast Universe

by searching The Daily Show, wherever you get your podcasts. Watch The Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus.