The Daily Show: Ears Edition - TDS Time Machine | News to Meet Ya!

Episode Date: April 8, 2026

Every year there are more and more "reporters" in the news media. Get to know them with Jordan Klepper's recurring segment, "News to Meet Ya!" Brian Glenn: Chief White House Correspondent of Real America's Voice, boyfriend of Marjorie Taylor Greene, and the man famous for asking Zelenskyy, “Why don’t you wear a suit?” Tim Pool: a conservative YouTuber and podcaster passionate about stroking Trump's ego and delivering truthful reporting sponsored by Russian interests. Conservative CNN commentator Scott Jennings, a former White House aide for George W. Bush who quickly ditched his establishment-bucking opinions to spew MAGA talking points for “the fun party.” "Fox & Friends" co-host Lawrence Jones, who is breaking the mold as a Black libertarian at a conservative, white-centric network. Benny Johnson: social media star turned White House press commentator, who caught Trump’s eye with his generic vitriol, Russian backing, penchant for plagiarism, and unyielding obsession with Batman. LindellTV, a 24/7 news outlet from an innovative media pioneer: The My Pillow Guy. Filled with A-list MAGA members, original rap music, ads within ads, and technical difficulties, LindellTV is asking the tough questions, like “Why does Trump look healthier than ever before?” -- Right now, go to https://quince.com/dailyshow for free shipping and 365-day returns. -- For up to 65% off your order, head to https://VeracityHealth.co and use code DAILY. -- Stream full episodes of The Daily Show on Paramount+: https://www.paramountplus.com/shows/the-daily-show/ The Daily Show airs weeknights at 11/10c on Comedy Central. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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the new year's strong. That's men go to mars.com for 50% off and three free gifts at checkout. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. You're listening to Comedy Central. That journalism is in a state of crisis, but in this new media landscape, new stars are emerging every day. So to find out who some of them are, we go to Jordan Klepper in our new segment, News to meet you. Tonight, we highlight a journalist who has quickly established himself as the new paragon of the free press. Chief White House correspondent for Real America's voice, Brian Glenn,

who recently made a name for himself when he pressed Ukrainian President Zelenskyy on a matter of global importance. Why don't you wear a suit? Why don't you wear a suit? You're the highest level in this country's office, and you refuse to wear a suit. Thank you. Thank you. Finally, the questions that matter. Now, most lamestream reporters would never dream of asking a question like that. They'd call it stupid or unnecessary or Jesus Christ, Brian.

The man's fighting for his country's survival. What kind of fucking question is that? That is not Glenn's style. And if this was your first time hearing about Brian Glenn, then good sir, you need to accept your uncle's Facebook friend request. Glenn got his start in Dallas. start in Dallas, Texas, where he honed his craft covering the most dangerous stories. All right. Do I just jump in? One, two, three.

Oh, just invited me to go dance. I'm going to jump up here real quick. We're pointing. Everybody follow me. You can see if we've got some dance moves here now. This is something that you're obviously, I have, there we go, I like this one right here. Out here in the stables this morning as these horses are enjoying some breakfast. You know what? I am ready for some racing. Yes. Now there's a man who knows how to dress appropriately for, work. Take note, Zelensky. It's right here. Glenn has proved time and time again that good journalism comes down to grit, heart, proximity to horses, and above all costumes. I'm kicking

these shoes off, but I may keep the panty hose on. This feels kind of good, actually. Wow, wow. What courage, what bravery. I mean, dressing and drag in Texas. I mean, reporters have put their asses on the line like that since Saigon. So, naturally, it was only a matter of time before Glenn was hired by Right Side Broadcasting Network, which is as legitimate as it sounds. And it was there at RSBN where he combined his love of human interest stories

with his hate of most of human beings. Liberal women tend to be some of the ugliest women I've ever seen. And I'm serious. I mean, zero makeup. Well, they're not. Well, they want to be men. They take no pride in their dress, their attire, their makeup, their haircut, half of them look like men, hairy armpits, hairy legs. Come on.

That is not embracing what it means to be a woman. Wow. I love hearing about women's looks from a guy whose general vibe is sunburnt D' Borset, who's no longer allowed in his kid's tee ball games. There's something here. There's something right here. People don't want spin. reporters to deliver unbiased, fact-based, hard news about which voters they bang.

And it was these hot takes that brought Glenn all the way from the campaign trail to the steps of Air Force One. A lot of Americans think that this is symbolic of what your campaign was all about. America first. Put the American people first. Your thoughts on that. We are. Thank you. I like that question. Boy, I want more questions like that. That's even a statement. Yeah. Ryan Glenn's questions are so good, they're actually just statements. You know what? It's all a clever setup,

like a hunter setting a trap. Butter him up, and then hit him hard. Show him how it's done, Brian. Let's talk about your polling numbers nationally. You're just crushing Biden. It continues to go up. Thoughts on that? He just said, I'm crushing Biden in the polls.

That's true. I appreciate that question. Thank you. Brian, thank you very much. Oh. Whoa. Oh. Amazing reportage.

The way you know you're speaking truth to power is when power tells you, what a great question. It's like if Frost Nixon was just Nixon. And these days, Brian Glenn is showing he'll chase down a story no matter where it takes him, from the streets to the sheets. Brian Glenn from Real America's voice,

he is the boyfriend of Marjorie Taylor Green. There you have it. Marjorie Taylor Green, Thank you so much for joining me today, and I'm sure I will see you a little bit later. Okay, I'll see you later. Oh, I'll see you later for the sex. Man, can you feel that erotic heat, you know?

Oh, violating journalistic ethics by not disclosing you're sleeping with the politician, you're interviewing it's wrong. I don't want to be right. And man, think about this. Think about this relationship. What does Marjorie Taylor Green, hate most in the world. Jews, maybe.

But... Right after that, reporters and drag queens. And Brian Glenn is both. You know what? That's... That's... That's the power of good journalism.

It doesn't just change minds. It changes hearts. So kudos to you, Brian Glenn. You went from embarrassing yourself on local news to embarrassing all of us on the national stage. But... Hey. At least you wore a suit.

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he's been attacking the establishment press harder than Elon's face by his own kids. And now the Trump administration is welcoming a crop of new media reporters to the White House. In fact, they're not just replacing old media. They're great replacing them. Starting today, this seat in the front of the room, which is usually occupied by the press secretary's staff, will be called the new media seat.

We have an individual in our new media seat today. His name is Tim Poole. Okay, all right. Lovely to meet you, Tim Poole, a YouTuber, and I'm assuming former GameStop employee. Now, his head might be cold, but he's in the hot seat. Let's hear him hold this administration's feet to the fire. Many of these organizations that are represented in this room have marked in lockstep on false narratives,

such as the very fine people hoax, the Covington Smear, and now what's being called the Maryland man hoax. I'm wondering if you can comment on the unprofessional behavior. Wow. Wow. Now that's a great question. Everyone in this room sucks. Do you care to comment? Okay. Okay. So the Trump administration has brought in the perfect weapon, someone who can attack the media from within the media. He's like a wolf in sheep's clothing if that clothing came from Hot Topic. You know what? You know what? Looks can be deceiving. If he has White House credentials, I'm sure he brings the dignified, well-sourced positions that we expect from qualified

journalists. You've got stories of migrants drilling cats and slaughtering mammals in the street. The left are like, women only get paid 73 cents on the dollar for what a means. man makes, but at the same time you have this trend of ladies nights where at bars women get discounts when they buy drinks. So spare me, dude. Because of trans issues, we must refer to the vagina as the front hole. Whoa! What? I can't believe what my upper side holes are hearing. My middle face hole is a game. My back hole is clenched. Are we all caught up here on how we're doing? But you know what? This is just how new media talks. If you're offended by that, you're stuck in the old legacy media world

and don't understand what an alpha this guy is. He's cool, tough, and you know what? The ladies love him. We're gonna end up with a generation of women who view almost all men as inadequate. I think it's crazy that I'm about to be 34 and I have no family. You know what the problem is though, it's definitely not me.

I think it's everybody else. I'm gonna play this hand blind. and say, it's definitely you, Tim. In fairness, I'm sure it's hard out there for guys who look like Joe Pesci's Home Alone stunt double. Fair. Fine. Fine. He's not great at analyzing his love life, but that doesn't mean he isn't great at analyzing

the political landscape and telling us not just what's happening, but what's going to happen next? Like the predictions he made about January 6th, two days prior. Newsweek says exclusive threat of police. pro-Trump violence in Washington overshadows inauguration security plans. Oh, I just love the depravity of these news outlets. When did Trump tweet go get violent and instigate violence? Trump said be there.

It'll be wild. What is it even, I'm having a party. Everybody, you've got to be there. It's going to be wild. What does that mean? Does that mean we're going to bring guns and it's going to be violent? No, it means we're going to have a party. Yeah.

You know what they say. It ain't a party until somebody drops a deuce at Nancy Pelosi's desk. Yeah, fine, fine. So new media's Tim Poole was wrong about January 6th. He's not a mind reader, even though he dresses like a street magician. Still, still, Tim can promise you this. He brings you the unbiased and unfiltered truth. The news you're getting comes straight from me and straight from the source.

I don't have a political agenda. Bringing real news and not narrative to all of you. Exactly. It's truth to table journalism. Immune to propaganda and outside influence. Tim Poole is an honest man who cannot be bought. Popular far-right American influencer, Tim Poole, unwittingly paid by Russian state media company RT

as part of an operation to influence American politics. Pool promoting pro-Russian narratives on a host of issues. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Are you saying I shouldn't trust a man who dresses like a divorced ghost hunter? What? Whoa. You know what, these, these news reports can say whatever they want to say,

but I'm sure he's not blatantly shilling for Russia. Ukraine is the enemy of this country. Ukraine is our enemy, being funded by the Democrats. I will stress this again, one of the greatest enemies of our nation right now is Ukraine. We should rescind all funding and financing, pull out all military support, and we should apologize to Russia. Now that is customer service. Come on, Tim, you're better than this. These allegations are true.

I'm outraged. You can't be pushing Russian propaganda. It doesn't matter how much they're paying you. A new report claims that during the 2024 campaign, Russian state media funneled $100,000 per episode to Tim Poole. F*** me in my front hole. Whoa! Whoa!

All right, all right. So what have we learned here today? We learned that Tim Poole has been compromised by Russian. interest. However, the good news is, I have not. Give me a call, Vlad, for the right price. This face hole can be all yours. D'adana, comrades. I'm Jordan Klepper. Good night and seriously, good f***ing. Tuned into CNN recently, you've probably seen a lot of this. Wait a minute. What am I, what am I lying about? You're lying. You're lying, Scott. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care about it.

They are. We can agree on basic facts. They are. Literally. Literally. Literally. We also, if we also get on this is outrageous. This is a, no, no, no, no, let me educate. Let me educate, let me educate you. No, no, no, no, you don't need to, you don't need to be condescending to me. So let me educate you about my position. I'm sorry, I didn't catch all of that. Now, if you don't know the Southern gentlemen, the other eight people were screaming at, is this guy. Scott Jennings. Senior CNN commentator and bitter enemy of the Von Trapp family singers. Now, before becoming the conservative face of CNN, you got to start in politics, smoothing over dubious activity

for the second Bush administration. White House aide Scott Jennings, the 29-year-old Wunderkin, part of a nefarious White House scheme to systematically fire disobedient U.S. attorneys. Jennings declined to answer most questions in the face of sharp complaints from Democrats. Senator, pursuant to the president's assertion, I must respectfully decline to answer that question at this time.

I must respectfully decline to answer your questions. I'm going to have to decline to answer that question. I'll have to decline to answer that. Wow. Worst Jeopardy contestant ever. I mean, not the point, but his transformation is full Jonah Hill here. Pretty soon, he's gonna get those armed tats and won't shut up about his therapist.

We get it, Jonah. But that was the last time. was the last time Jennings would ever decline to share his opinion, because he soon joined CNN, where he made a name for himself as a rare conservative voice who would openly attack Donald Trump. He's clearly violated his oath of office to preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution. This is outrageous, it's beyond the pale. Every Republican ought to be able to say so.

We need a new nominee. If we nominate him again, we will lose. It sounds like an unhinged, deranged person has gotten loose and is out on the street. It may be a danger to themselves and others. Exactly. Scott Jennings is a principled man who knows Donald Trump is a danger to the party.

He's not going to backtrack. You're certainly not going to see Donald Trump suddenly praising him for his total compliance say, I don't know, two years later. You know, we have a man here that I don't know, but he's defending me all the time on CNN. And he defends me really well. Scott Jennings.

Here's Scott. Michigan. We were four. flying in here today. And I said, look at these farms. I got to get a farm in Michigan. Because when you own as many libs as I do, you got to put a place to put them all. And the person sitting next to him on the plane said, okay, I'm going to put my headphones in now and just listen to a podcast. Cool. Cool.

So, how did Jennings metamorphosize from principled caterpillar to Craven Butterfly? Well, after a few years on CNN, Scott Jennings realized that bucking the establishment was hard. And shouting MAGA talking points was easy. and fun. Democrats care more about dudes who want to become women than dudes who just want to be Democrats. Well, Democrats, they are for things. Illegal aliens.

You're for boys and girls' sports. The wolf mom. There's thousands of Hitler's running around this country right now, running around college campuses, running around New York City. Those are the Hitler. Let me- Okay, okay. In fairness, the Times Square's Hitler's are just Venezuelan guys in Hitler outfits.

You know, when it goes, you know, when it goes, you know, comes to spotting Nazis, Jennings has proven he has a keen eye. Watch him hear Hitler-Splained to his colleagues after Elon Musk gave a Sieg-Hile salute in public. What do you mean, come on? I mean, you are way off the rails. I think it's kind of... I'm off the rails.

You're the one who defended Sieg-Hiling as a normal activity. This is, this salute truthorism is outrageous. This is the most... So do it right now on TV. This is the biggest... So do it right now on TV. If you think it's normal, if you think this is a normal way to greet people, do it right now. on TV. Why won't you?

I want to, I want to redirect us here. Oh, my favorite game, truth or dare or Nazi. Oh. You know what? Let's goose step in another direction, shall we? Because Scott Jennings is not all Nazis and lib farming. He also knows how to have a good time. The Republicans have become the fun party.

We're the fun party. We're the fun party. America. It's the fun party. Once again, it's cool to be a Republican. Chuck Julie. We need to stand out. Chuck Julie, I invite you to get in on it.

It is true. We're back, baby. We're back, baby. And they say white people can't dance. Sorry, I read that wrong. They say white people can't dance and they're right. Of course, Jennings' antics started to garner him more camera time, so he continued to roll out funnier and funnier

and funnier bits. Some of these countries are basically irrelevant. You know, Kazakhstan, whatever. Some of them are more relevant. But you're going to hear from the Kazakhs on that. No, I know, I know. Very nice. Oh, nailed it.

Oh, man. That is a killer borat in 2025. I mean, does he do this at home? I'd hate to be his wife. Now, you'd think to basically. Facing yourself with a Borat impression on CNN might be the end of your career, but now that there are rumors

that Jennings could replace Mitch McConnell in the Senate, which is shocking, frankly. I didn't know it was even possible to switch places with Mitch McConnell through an election. I thought the only path involved was breaking an ancient curse. But I'm not gonna ask Scott Jennings just one question. It would be this.

Do you actually believe in this Trump shit? Are you just shamelessly paroding MAGA talking points to gain access into our country's highest halls of power. I must respectfully decline to answer your question. Fair enough. Good night. Spring is the ideal time for a wardrobe reset. Moving away from a cluttered closet and focusing on fewer high-quality pieces. Quince specializes in these elevated essentials, offering premium materials and thoughtful fits at a price point that actually makes sense for a long

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Go to quince.com slash daily show for free shipping and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Go to Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash daily show for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash daily show. When Westcham first took flight in 1996, the vibes were a bit different. People thought denim on denim was peak fashion. Inline skates were everywhere, and two out of three women rocked the Rachel.

While those things stayed in the 90s, one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when WestJet welcomes you on board. Here's to WestJetting since 96. Travel back in time with us and actually travel with us at westjet.com slash 30 years. When it comes to Fox News host, there's definitely a type. You've got your blondes, your other blondes, your dirty blondes, your youthful blondes, your shrieking blondes, and, of course, Trey Gaudy. There's at least one person on Fox that breaks the mold. Fox and Friends co-host Lawrence Jones. And what might initially stand out

is that he's a black reporter on a mostly white network for mostly white people. But that doesn't bother Lawrence. In fact, he's well aware of the optics. When someone is hearing about Fox News, I think the elephant of the room is they don't expect someone that looks like me. I'm a black man and I'm also a conservative.

I'm not a Republican member. I'm a conservative. I'm a libertarian. I said, well, I'm a libertarian. You're a strong Republican conservative man. And sometimes I disagree with the party. He goes, well, that won't be a problem. When we disagree, you just be you.

Great. Great. He's a free thinker ready to challenge the status quo. This isn't your father's Fox News host. That guy was fired for sexual harassment eight years ago. No. The network is excited to welcome a fresh, diverse staff, and I'm sure his coworkers won't make it awkward in any way.

What's wrong, brother? I'm back in studio with you. Well, bro, what on earth is going on here? What's with that in your head? The part. You said you love the part. It's flavor. We've got to bring some flavor.

Is that a Nike swoosh? It's like, it's a part. A part. It's a part, yeah. Well, brother, your time's up. Security. But when he wasn't explaining his hair to Stuart Barney, Lawrence was out in the field conducting diner focus groups,

shoving his microphone into the syrup smeared faces of the Maga faithful. Sir, how do you feel about this economy under Joe Biden? Terrible. We're talking about the former president being under prosecution right now. What do you make of it? Do you think that is fair? You say that you're going for Donald Trump and McCormick. The question is why?

78% of America's are living paycheck to paycheck. Sir, how do you feel about this economy? What do you think about that, that trash comment? You seem just like an average day woman. You seem just like an average day woman. Smooth with the ladies there, Lawrence. Yeah, she's a Wednesday, folks, but with a little makeup, she could be a late afternoon Thursday.

Eventually, Lawrence landed his own show where he honed his interviewing talents on the streets. tonight right here in New York City, where we see cops being shot on a daily basis. Do you feel safe in the city? Yeah, absolutely. I don't feel unsafe walking around or doing anything. Absolutely. I think, well, I trust the police force a lot, and I think that the city is back and rejuvenated, and so there are people out all the time, and yeah, I feel safe.

Do you feel safe in the city? Yeah, I do. Frankly, I didn't expect those responses. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Because you only watch Fox News. You know, and just a quick note, if you're trying to paint a city as dangerous, maybe don't do it from an artisanal farmer's market.

The scariest thing there is the markup on heirloom tomatoes. Regardless, Lawrence quickly became Fox's most dependable man on the street reporter. They could send him anywhere, and I mean anywhere. Watch these two clips that could not have more different energies. So tell me, how do y'all start y'all's day? Morning, we're seeing two things you can't have been out. Two things you can't put out. Two things you know. Bronzer and cocaine.

Bronze or then cocaine? I know I'm a senior in college. So we're back at Torah Academy of Bergen County. I just want to bring in the panel back in. What does the Torah say about bronzer and cocaine? But Lawrence's beat wasn't just hard drugs and Judaism. No, Fox also sent him down to the board. sent him down to the border to report live from the war zone.

Fox News reporter, contributor Lawrence Jones, is there anyone that believes this is a manufactured crisis? I'm standing right on the border by the Rio Grande is right behind me. They didn't just tell me that it was a crisis. They actually showed me the crisis on the border. It is a crisis, Sean. They stole one of my ear pods. Crisis.

Also, quick question. But Lawrence, did that bulletproof vest shrink in the wash? I mean, it's supposed to cover more than just your nipples. Are you running a marathon? What's happening here? Regardless of the ill-fitting apparel, going on Fox News assignments can be a humiliating experience. But Lawrence prides himself as a freethinker,

a libertarian who will challenge Fox Orthodoxy. So, when he actually had the chance to sit down next to the most powerful person on the planet, I'm sure he took his opportunity to ask the questions no one else on Fox News was brave enough to ask. We got a six-year-old from Massachusetts, and who wants to know about your favorite animal? I love cows.

I love cows. No heifers, no heifers, cows. The truth is, while Lawrence may tout his outsider perspective and claim he's not what viewers are used to, If you listen close, he's just another fox blonde. People are so sick of all the woke nonsense. We've just gotten so crazy with this woke nonsense. White privilege doesn't have a legal definition.

I don't believe in the whole notion of white privilege. And these are the same people who can't even define what a woman is. They can't even define what a woman is. We can't even protect our own borders. We cannot protect the border. They're paid professional agitated. There's a lot of paid professional protesters. They're indoctrinating our kids.

indoctrinating our kids, it's an indoctrination cesspool. Wow. Wow. Lawrence, no offense, but you seem like an average day Fox News host. Sorry. Good night. Good for your luck. Lately, President Trump has been introducing a slew of new reporters to the White House press pool, including social media star and fellow forehead American, Benny Johnson. Lucky for us, he's not afraid to hold the powerful accountable and ask the tough questions. Will the president consider giving the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Big Balls?

Ooh. That's a very important question. It'll be the first Medal of Freedom awarded to a human scrotum since Rush Limbaugh. It is these kinds of bold and very wrinkly questions that Benny Johnson has been asking for years on his creative. titled programs like The Benny Show, the Benny Report, Benny Bruze, and Benny on the block, and of course, breaking Benny, two and a half Beny's,

and the Kelly Clarkson show featuring Benny Johnson. But before he was getting literally a billion views online, Benny worked at story news outlets like Breitbart, The Blaze, and BuzzFeed, where he honed a unique perspective that was definitely authentic. authentic and original. BuzzFeed announced it was firing its viral politics editor, Benny Johnson, for plagiarism.

Johnson wholesale copied words and entire phrases from The Guardian, U.S. News and World Report, and even Yahoo Answers. How bad of a writer do you have to be to cheat on a BuzzFeed article with Yahoo! Yahoo! Answers!

The website that bravely asks, what if Wikipedia was written by guys who scroll, graffiti in public toilets. But, now that he's no longer at bus feed, he's not forced to write drivel, like, which Harry Potter house matches your Disney princess style.

I'm a Hufflepuff Moana, but that's beside the point. Benny is now free to talk politics. Give us a taste. Every single thing you hate about your life right now or American culture is caused by mass immigration. American cities are treasures,

and we should not sacrifice them to be Mongoloid, Hoard. White rage is how you win a war. Leftists are a death cult. Save this country from literal demons, from Satanists and from scum. You Slytherin, Elsa, bitch. Maybe we were too hard on plagiarism, you know?

Regardless, Benny's constant stream of vitriol and cruelty has reaped him billions of views. Frankly, it blows my mind that someone this unoriginal and derivative can garner such online attention, and the ear, of the president. I mean, what am I missing? Some of the most famous, most viewed right-wing online influencers were being paid by Russia.

Part of a Kremlin-backed campaign to fuel Russian narratives. Among those stars, Benny Johnson. Oh! He's just being paid by foreign forces to destroy America from within. Phew! I thought my neighbors actually like the guy. You know, his popularity can't just all be Russia putting their finger on the scale. Perhaps there's a star quality there.

Just show me the undeniable charisma, Benny. Oh! That's the good, the first good question I've heard you ask. What is going? He dances like a jabberwocky with polio. Now, I know J.D. Vance said we don't have to apologize for being white anymore, but on behalf of the whites, I'm sorry you all had to see that. You know what?

You don't have to have coordinated. limbs or a toddler's sense of rhythm to be compelling. Hit us with your classic Benny Johnson charm and humor. Welcome to the Benny Report. I'm Batman. Actually, I'm Benny Johnson. Okay, okay. For a second, I thought he was Batman.

You got me, Benny? And I'll tell you what, if you like that Batman reference, don't worry, there's plenty more. Have you ever watched The Dark Night, arguably the greatest superhero film of all time? The scene. Batman like comes up through the floor and there's like seven bad guys and they're like who is and it's a big Batman just takes them all out. I want Batman to stay Batman not turn

into Antifa Man. So I'm a big Batman fan. We're going to begin by saying Batman for you boy. No no no no we are not. We are adults and we do adult things. Yes, adults and we do adult things like crossword puzzles by orthotic inserts and drink quietly over the sink after our wife goes to bed. We do adult things. But yeah, Benny loves Batman so much. He even released an AI video of himself dressed as Batman and punching immigrants in a Walmart parking lot. I know what you're thinking. You know, what a xenophobic and cruel vision of Batman. But but it's still better than the George Clooney one. You're all thinking of it.

You're all thinking it. And you know what? I know I'm going to hate this answer. But what is it about the Cape Crusader you even like so much, Benny? Both Trump and Batman are rich, mysterious, unpredictable guys. They own skyscrapers in Gotham. Okay. So your favorite thing about Batman is that he's rich and owns buildings.

Benny, you don't like Batman. You like Bruce Wayne. Benny Johnson watches Batman fighting the Joker like, boo, you're missing the black tie gala for this. I got to admit, Benny, Benny, you're running out of chances to win me over here. Can you show me anything that proves you have the goods to speak truth to power? What's up guys, this is Benny. We are taking you inside alligator Alcatraz today with President Trump. One of the most deadly spots on earth.

The middle of the Florida Everglades. Let's freaking cook. This is going to be a wild one. rock and roll. So if you come along with us on a nice raid in Chicago, let's go. Let's rock and roll. Oh, yeah, nothing says let's rock and roll like a quarter zip and some Warby Parker's. Although I will say one thing I liked, not one mention of Batman. Underneath Chicago, you recognize some of these tunnels from the actual Dark Night series. Last time, thirsty influencer cosplay as a journalist at best, you are the nipples on George Clooney's

Batman suits. A gross appendage that years from now history would prefer to forget. At least I think that's true, according to Yahoo answers. I'm Jordan Klepper. Good night and seriously. Good fucking luck. After 19 years, they're back. Frankie Munis, Brian Cranston, and the

rest of the family reunite in Malcolm in the middle, life's still unfair. After 10 years avoiding them, Hal and lowest demand Malcolm be at their anniversary party, pulling him straight back into their chaos. Malcolm in the middle, life's still unfair. A special four-part event, streaming April 10th on Hulu on Disney Plus. These fragmented media environment, it can be hard to know which news sources you can trust. Even I don't always know where to turn. If only there was some truth teller out

there that would answer the call. I'm here today to announce Lindell TV. We have 24-7 TV with all your favorite hosts. Yes! 24-7 news from the My Pillow Guy. It just makes sense. I mean, you know Mike Lindell, the former crackhead current candidate for a governor of Minnesota, an inventor of the only pillow

stuffed exclusively with shredded lawsuits against Mike Lindell. Now, you may not have seen Lindell TV because you haven't been in a waiting room of a dentist who uses crystal meth as an anesthetic. So, let me introduce you to this innovative media pioneer who lives by a set of core news values.

This Judeo-Christian platform we're going to have here. They go by biblical principles. So in other words, you can't, you're not going to have porn up there. You can't say the C word, the N-word, the F-word, and you can't use God's name and name in vain. What a concept, right? Yeah. An amazing concept.

I'm so tired of Wolf Blitzer's show showing me porn and calling God a . Now, the elites might tell you that a pillow company that has been banned from Walmart has no business in journalism. But much like his products, Lindel TV is flawless. Hello, everybody, and welcome to the Lindell show here. Edward, I'm getting that feedback like crazy again.

Can you hear me okay, Vanessa? I can hear you. Okay. How about now? I can hear you. Vanessa, can you hear me? At least the 98 people who have watched this clip can hear you. Lindel TV is so much more than one man in its foyer aimlessly asking for tactical support.

It's cementing its Judeo-Christian legacy with marquee shows, like the war room with Steve Bannon, where Maga gets its marching orders from a man losing a forever war with washing his face. Then there's famed Trump supporters Diamond and Silk, featuring Silk and an intro that still honors the legacy of the late Diamond. And I promise you, this is unedited. I wish it was 2003 so I could download that song as my ringtone. Trump's yo president.com. Download the song, use it as a ringtone, add it to your playlist

so you can get your boogie-oogie on. It's the classic journalism technique of getting to the who, what, where, woogy-uggy of the story. All of it being broadcast from what appears to be Diamond's wake. I mean, look at that painting of Diamond, Trump, and Silk tastefully shoved behind an

Ottoman. Everything so meticulously arranged by Lindel TV's production designer slash funeral director. But if you still need more news, there's the Rudy Giuliani show, which, like Diamond and Silk, also appears to be hosted by

a dead person. Good evening. This is Rudy Giuliani, and this is Rudy Giuliani show on Lindell TV. Live from Death's Door, it's Rudy Giuliani. He's a body brace, man. Whoa, apparently Lindel TV doesn't offer sick days for a collapsed spine. But their programming is vast. There's scriptures and Wall Street, the Counterculture Mom show, and Maha with Mike. And you know what, trust me.

This Mike guy is sharp. Good morning, Maha Nation. This is Maha Bike. Oh, oh. Did he say Maha Bike? Missed it by this much. Not to go all lame stream media, but I'm going to have to fact-check you on

your own name there, Bichel. Now, sorry, Mike. Look, you might argue a network of this caliber belongs nowhere near the White House. And to that, I say, they're already in the White House. Starting with Lindell TV reporter Kara Castronova, who isn't afraid to hold this administration's feet to the fire. Will you guys also consider releasing the president's fitness plan?

He actually looks healthier than he did eight years ago. And I'm sure everybody in this room could agree. Is he working out with Bobby Kennedy? And is he eating less McDonald's? Yes. Quick follow-up. How does he get those round, sweet, sine bun, ankles, huh?

And hand bruises so taut, you could sink a quarter into them. But despite Lindell TV's trove of magnetic on-air personalities, it's easy to forget the real star of the network. The ads for Mike Lindell's products. It's finally here, our second annual mega sale. My new towels with proprietary technology. My coffee is now available on mypill.com. That's Lindell Oilboom.com.

collected oil royalty checks is the next generation of energy drinks. Rev 7. I'm so sure you're going to love Rev 7 that for a limited time you can try our three-pack absolutely free or check out our Perkale bedsheets. He's doing a bed sheet ad inside an energy drink ad. Up on caffeine, he keeps shitting his sheets. Don't call it quits. Relo. This is what new media looks like.

it's not so much ad-supported news as it is news-supported ads. And it might be easy to write off Lindell TV as Q&N QVC. But the fact is, they're the ones living in the Pentagon briefing room while the traditional news media is dead outside. If only there was a way to send off

those dearly departed reporters with a little bit of dignity. I'm Jordan Clapper. Good night. And seriously, good for a fucking lot. Explore more shows from The Daily Show podcast universe by searching The Daily Show. you get your podcasts. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11,

10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.