The Daily Show: Ears Edition - The French Election - Other Countries Have News Too

Episode Date: April 24, 2022

For decades France has been one of the few European countries the rest of the world didn’t have to worry about, but with the upcoming April 24th election between current president Emmanuel Macron & far-right contender Marine Le Pen, that could all change.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. For decades now, France has been one of the few countries in Europe you didn't have to worry about, right? They didn't make Nazis, they didn't go bankrupt, they didn't hire a wet tele-tubby as their prime minister. But this weekend, this coming weekend, as the French gear up for a national election, everyone is wondering if this is the moment when France goes off the deep end.

A rematch runoff in the battle for the most powerful politician in France, current President Emmanuel Macron and Far Right candidate Marine Le Penh. The two will face off on April 24th as a repeat of their 2017 election. This is the far right leader's third and final attempt at the French presidency. And if you go by the polls, she's, she, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, thi, goes, th, goes, goes, goes, goes, goes, goes, goes, goes, goes th, goes th, goes th, goes th goes goes th goes th goes th goes th goes goes goes th goes goes th goes goes goes th goes goes th goes th, goes th, goes th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. the, the, thi. thi. the the the the thr-fe, the thr-fe, the thro, to to to to to to to to to to to to thrace thro thro thro thro thrace th This is the far-right leader's third and final attempt at the French presidency. And if you go by the polls, she's never got as close as this. With the very latest polls suggesting more support for Marine Lepen, more people are asking whether France is on the verge of its own Brexit moments or Trump moments. No!

No! There's a possibility of a French Trump. Jesus, if you thought Donald Trump was horny before. I don't think the world is ready for what this election could bring. Can you imagine that? My fellow Parisians, the Mona Lisa is so hot, totally hot. But she needs to smell more. If I win, we're going to make Mona Lisa, smell again.

Oh, so much smelling. So smiling. But yeah. France's current president, Emmanuel Macron is going up against Far-right candidates, Marine Le Pen, right? In an election that is happening this Sunday. And yesterday, they sat down for their first and only debates of the campaign. And throughout the night, you could tell that these two do not get along.

French President Emmanuel Macron sparring with his far-right rival, Marine Le Pen in a fiery, high-stakes-tave-taheighed-nearned- fiery high stakes TV debate last night. Two politicians who clearly don't like or respect each other. The longer it went on, the worse the atmosphere. I find it so hard to follow you as you have made so many false accusations. Oh, oh, oh, oh. But stop mixing things up. Do not give me a lesson. I'm not giving you a lesson.

Do not give me a lesson on how to finance my plan. You know, I know this fight was considered intense by French media, but by American standards, that was pretty chill. It was like, yeah, everyone stayed in their seats, no one was screaming. If anything, it looked less like a debate and more like a stressed couple arguing at a restaurant, you know. I was like, no, Brian, I told you, my parents gave me that money, I don't want to spend it on crypto. I told you, babe, it's not crypto, it's an NFT. What's the difference? What's the difference?

All that was missing from that debate, was that moment, you know, when you weights are coming in in the middle of that whole fight? You know, just being like, okay, everybody, so the specials of the day are, ooh, I feel like I walked into something here. Did I, I'm feeling a little tension? Did he, did he say something to you? Is that what it is? Yeah, you know what, I feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you th feel th feel th feel th feel thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the special? the special, the special, I the the special, I the the the the the the the special, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, I'm, thi, thi, theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat the... I'll come back, I'll give you some time, I'll be back in about 10 seconds. Okay, okay, bye-bye, bye.

Now, the stakes for this debate were probably the highest that France has ever seen, because this election has gotten a lot closer than people expected. You see, when these two faced off in 2017, Macron beat Le Pen by 30%. But with only a few days left in this election, recent polls have showed Le Pen within single digits. So she's not leading in the polls. But remember, neither was Donald Trump in 2016.

Yeah. My point is, hopefully Mocron visits whatever France's Wisconsin is. And there's a number of reasons, is, hopefully Macron visits whatever France's Wisconsin is. And there's a number of reasons, there's a number of reasons that Le Pen is catching up to Macron, right? The country has experienced a refugee crisis. There's obviously been a pandemic. And of course, there's rising inflation, which is why a lot of French voters are

angry at Macron and saying things like this. Everyone talks about the taxes, the taxes, the taxes, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tha, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tha, their, the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, is is. Ande, is. Ande, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, is.a, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their s about the taxes, the taxes, this woman said, we have no spending power, we just work and buy groceries to eat. We go out to restaurants less, we do less, otherwise it's really tough at the end of the month. I think France is collapsing from, you see something like this. Because no, because using your cuisine to comment on the dire state of your politics, that's the most French thing you could do. You know, our country is collapsing from the inside like a souffle. No, because think about, I've never seen people in any other country make a metaphor like

that on the news. Not once have I seen someone being interviewed in the streets of Nigeria being like, our problems run deeper than their flavors of Joloferize, huh? That's not a thing. But of course, elections are about choices. A lot of French people aren't thrilled with Macron's presidency, but they'll still take him compared to the person that he's running against, the notorious Marine Lippen. Because you see, she has a long history of being Islamophobic, of being xenophobic,

ergophobic. Basically, she doesn't like a lot of shit, is what I'm saying. And on top of that, the people that she does like tell you a lot about the type of leader that she would be. Lepen is a NATO skeptic. She wants to leave the EU and has modeled her campaign on President Trump. Lepen has a history of cosing up to President Putin, even putting a picture of them together in one of her campaign pamphlets. The policies I represent are the policies represented by Mr. Trump. They're represented by Mr. Putin. Ooh! That take didn't age well.

She likes Putin. I mean, to be fair to her, they asked her about Putin in 2017. And back then, Putin was just undermining elections and poisoning people. It was still too soon to tell. She was like, I'm on the fence, you never know. But you see it's views like these that led to Le Pen getting crushed when she ran in 2012 and 2017. But here's what's dangerous about her. Just like a Terminator, she gets smarter with each sequel. Yeah, no, you see, after the last election, she started to rebrand as a kinder, gentler racist, you know? Yeah. May I take you back to where you came from?

And the way she did that, she did it by not abandoning her extremist views. No, she just doesn't mention them as much anymore. It's basically like when you do a Zoom meeting, and then you point the camera at that one clean corner of your apartment. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, now all of a sudden things seem under control. But you've still got a family of raccoons eating leftover Chinese food on your couch. It's still the same world. And Le Pen hasn't stopped at just moderating her words. No, she's trying to revamp her image to cultivate a more cuddly version of herself. Marine Lippen has wrapped herself in nice words and her cats.

She's become a cat breeder. Everybody loves that. This kitten is so beautiful that her name is her majesty. You know, so adorable. Yeah, that's how you know Lepen had the worst possible image before because her PR people were like, You know it will make you more relatable? Becoming a cat lady. It's gonna help.

So that's where France stands headed into the election this Sunday. A moderate incumbent with weak approval numbers hoping to hold off a xenophobic Putin ally who's coming back for one last shot at the presidency. And you know, that's what I love about French politics. It's just so different from the USA. Watch the Daily Show, weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a comedy central podcast.