The Daily Show: Ears Edition - The White House Coronavirus Outbreak Spreads | Alexandra Pelosi & Colin Quinn

Episode Date: October 8, 2020

The coronavirus runs rampant in the White House and Pentagon, Alexandra Pelosi discusses her documentary "American Selfie," and Colin Quinn talks about his book "Overstated." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News, listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17th. Hey, what's going on everybody?

Welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. I'm Trevor Noah. Today is Wednesday, the 7th of October, which is an important date in American history. Because today, marks the the four th-60-s th-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s th-s th-s th-s th-all-all-all-s th-all-all-s thi-all-all-s thi-all-all-s thi-s thi-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-alle-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-s th-s th-s th-s th-s thi-s thi-s thi-s thi-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all-all, thii-all-all-all-allee-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-alle-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a- Wednesday, the 7th of October, which is an important date in American history, because today marks the four-year anniversary of the Access Hollywood, grabbing by the pussy tape. Man, I have fond memories of that day. That's the day that we knew for certain that Donald Trump would never be president. Anyway, coming up on tonight's show. President Donald Trump, his corona outbreak, threats to spread to spread tho. th. th. th. th. tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod to today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today,, coming up on tonight's show,

President Donald Trump, his corona outbreak continues to spread throughout the White House. Meanwhile, Facebook is clamping down on dangerous conspiracies and dangerously sexy onions. And we also found a replacement for all those Christopher Columbus statues. So let's do this, people. Welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. From Trevor's couch in New York City to your couch somewhere in the world. This is the Daily Social Distancing Show with Trevor Noah. Ears Edition. Let's kick things off with the White House, the residents of the President and new head office for coronavirus. It has been five days since President Trump revealed that he had tested positive for COVID-19,

which was his most depressing test results since he found out his wife was pregnant with Eric. And since that time, the virus has been spreading faster than an HBO password on a college campus. This morning, the COVID outbreak spreading through the White House has reached the Pentagon, and now almost the entire Joint Chiefs of Staff, including the military's most senior general, Mark Millie and other top officers, are in quarantine after being exposed to the Coast Guard's number two officer, Admiral Charles Ray. This is the number of people testing positive who have been near the President or at the White House in recent days spike to 24. The latest name, Senior Advisor Stephen Miller, who was

part of a debate prep session with the president last week. As President Trump continues to downplay the severity of the virus, the White House has become a hotbed of infection, his military aid who carries the so-called nuclear football, a presidential valet who serves his meals, plus two more staffers in the press office also testing positive. Yes, the nation's top generals and the guy who carries the nuclear football are all quarantining now. And you might think that this is the perfect opportunity to invade America because the Pentagon is going to have to coordinate America's defense over Zoom.

But actually, given how infectious America is right now, good luck convincing your soldiers to attack. Sergei, now is perfect time. Go and occupy the White House. No, why don't you occupy White House? No, you go occupy White House. Yeah, what don't you? Yeah, but you may, you go. No, Sergei, you go. Basically, right now, America's that free mattress that you find on the curb. You could take it, but you know it's infested with something.

And guys, I know that a lot of people are going to make fun of Stephen Miller for getting coronavirus, but please, we should all be concerned for him. Because with a forehead that big, can you imagine if he gets a fever? That's just gonna affect climate change all by itself. Not to mention, Stephen Miller is at much higher risk because COVID is harder on people over 60. He's 35? Are you shitting me? You know who I really feel bad for? Jared Fushner.

Because think about it, the guy already has like 50 jobs, and now everyone else has to quarantine, he's gonna have to pick up all the slack. Jared, I'm going to need you to run the military, be my press secretary, and hold on to the nuclear football. But I've never held a football. You've got to appreciate the irony, though, right? The president who spent years blaming Mexicans for bringing over disease,

has personally turned the White House into a Petri dish. But look, we've been talking about th, th, th, th, th, th, th – th – th – th – th – th – thu thu-n, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, the the to thi, thi, thi, to thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the the, the the the the, the the the the thu, th. th. th. th. th. to, to to to to to thi, to thi, to to to thin, thru. told, told, today, today, today, today, today, today, told to told the. the. thu. thu. th, we've been talking about nothing but Corona all week. And there is other stuff happening. In fact, there's some pretty big news today from the world of tech. A blockbuster report by House lawmakers calling on Congress to break up big tech after a 16-month investigation into Apple, Amazon, Google and Facebook, the Democratic-led judiciary committee says, the Big Four Hold or Abuse abuse monopoly power and need to be reigned in. The 450 page report compares the industry giants to the likes of oil barons and railroad tycoons. That's right. A major house investigation is recommending that the big tech companies have become powerful monopolies and so they should be broken up. And that means Amazon could be split off

into one company that sells you the products that you're trying to buy and then another company that tricks you into buying weird knockoffs from countries that no longer exist. Apple could be separated into one company that sells you phones and then another company that sells you a different charging cable every year for no reason! And then Google could be broken up into one company that gives you search results and another company that just keeps guessing what you're about to type. How do you get rid of a rash on your crutch? Ew, no. Install a ceiling fan. When you have a rash on your crutch? Now, I'm not going to front. On the one hand, this is almost so obvious

that I can't believe it took a 16-month investigation to figure out. Of course, these big tech companies are monopolies. And breaking them up could be a good idea. I mean, if you break up Amazon, that is great news for bookstores in 1997. On the other hand, the only reason these companies have gotten so big is because people love using them. So, Congress might want to be careful about how far they take this thing. Good news, everybody.

We're breaking Amazon up. Okay, Congress. I guess y'all going to be delivering my shampoo, because I want prim from somebody, I don't care who it is. There's no question that that utations of big tech companies have taken a hit in recent years. I mean, for instance, Facebook used to be the place where you reconnect with old high school friends and then block them when you discover that they're married. But then in the last few years, it's become it's become, it's become the JFK assassination. And now it seems like Facebook has recognized what it's become.

And they're finally taking steps to put an end to one of the biggest problems. Facebook says it is now removing all accounts associated with the right-wing conspiracy movement known as Q&N. Those accounts have become hubs for wild internet rumors and disinformation campaigns. Now it says it's removing all Q&N accounts on both Facebook and Instagram. It's a serious blow to the Q&ON Internet conspiracy campaign that most Americans would say

sounds completely crazy. That big name Democrats, Hollywood stars and the mega-rich are actually child trafficking pentophiles who kill children in satanic rituals. Okay, okay, you know what? Good for Facebook for doing this. Although part of me is a little worried that it's too little too late. I mean, Facebook is like that bar that decides to hire a bouncer after its 123rd stabbing. Because people, Q&N has become so widespread

that basically every Facebook group right now is a Q&ON group. Even your grandma's knitting group is like, Today we're learning a new needlepoint pattern. Do you like it? Now, of course, for Q&on followers, this whole thing is just going to reinforce their belief that Big Tech is censoring them because they're also in on the conspiracy, which is ridiculous. No one at Facebook is eating babies, okay? Because without babies, boom,

that's 90% of Facebook posts gone. So look, I'm glad that Facebook is trying to shut down these groups, but to be honest, I'm skeptical that it's gonna work. Because when it comes to monitoring content on their platform, they don't exactly have the best track record. Facebook apparently thinks this ad is too-a-a. Gaze Speed Company in Canada got this notification about its onions. According to Facebook, the placement of the vegetable was overtly sexual. Okay, what clearly happened here is that the algorithm that's supposed to detect sexy stuff got confused.

Or who knows? Maybe it did it on purpose. In which case, who are we to shame it? Love who you love, algorithm. You don't let the people judge you. But this is why you need an actual human involved in these decisions. Because no human would think an onion is sexy. Like, have you ever seen an onion? You know, it's just like it's round and it's firm and juicy and it's got all those layers that come off and... Woof, does it just get hot in here? Oh, man, I need to get out of the house. And there are other changes coming to social media too.

For example, Instagram, you know, the app that you use for stalking your tinder date. Well if your feet has become a little thoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, it's thiiiiiiiiii, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's th. thi, thi, that's thi, thi, th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that that that that the that the the that that that that the that that that that, that, that, the app that you use for stalking your tinder date. Well, if your feed has become a little toxic, here's something that might calm things down. Instagram says it will start hiding negative comments in posts. It's an effort to reduce bullying and harassment. After a user writes a potentially offensive comment, a warning will pop up before it's posted, saying this may go against our guidelines. Users will have to click the view hidden comments to see the negative the th thome the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thomomome thi thioma the thom- thom-tom-tom-tom-tom thomom thom thomom the the thi thi the thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. the to click the view hidden comments button to see the negative comment. All right. That's what I'm talking about. Thank you, Instagram. This is a great step.

I think everyone can agree. You don't want to go on Instagram and see hate-filled messages. I know I don't want that. I want to go on Instagram and see sexy onions, butts, I mean butts, not onions, not onions. I'm a normal man that likes butts. At the same time, I'm a little worried that hiding negative comments behind a warning is just going to make people want to click on them even more. Oh, you don't want to see this comment. This was such a great burn. We had to hide it. I mean, god damn. This was a sick burn. Don't look. Don't look. It's too good. Like here's one of the problems with this policy.

Can it pick up tone? Half the time, someone comments brave under a picture. I'm pretty sure that it's just a form of bullying. Oh my god. It was so brave of you to put that picture up of yourself. What do you mean brave, dude. So brave. But you know what? As long as Instagram is going to be cracking down, how about they find a way to punish those people who post a thousand stories at once? You've got all those little tiny white dots at the top of your screen like a game of fucking Pac-Man. Yeah, I want to see how your day is going, not watch the Peter Jackson director's cut of your life.

Highlights! And finally, there's one is all about keeping up with the coronavirus. Something to leave you with a smile today. Apple is upgrading its mask emoji. This new masked emoji covers a smile. So the facial feature matches the smiley emoji. The old mask had just two slits for eyes. Apple has not commented on why it upgraded the design to the one that now has a little bit more cheerful disposition. Yes, they they they they they they they they they they they they they they now. They now. They now. They now they now the the the the the the th. They now th. T th. T th. Yes, tho tho tho tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thi, the, the, the, the, th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, is the is the is also the is also that that that that that that theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee is the isto the one that now has a little bit more cheerful disposition. Yes, they now have an emoji for people who are happy to be wearing a mask.

And what's also cool is that they have an emoji for people who protest masks because they love freedom. Now look, they say that this emoji is smiling, but it doesn't really look like it's smiling. We don't know if it's smiling, which I guess makes it really realistic. Because think about it. For the last few months, we've been walking around with these masks. No one can tell what your expression actually is. Yeah, you're trying to smile with your eyes, but to the other person, some freaky shit is going on under there. All right, when we come back, screw Christopher Columbus! We find an Italian-American hero that all Americans can support.

So don't go away. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.

I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. Here in the United States, this coming Monday is Columbus Day. The holiday celebrating Christopher Columbus for stumbling ass backwards into the new world and then killing most of the people who lived there. But for a lot of Americans, that story isn't as charming as it once was. You likely learned this line in school.

In 1492 Columbus sailed the ocean blue. In 2020, Columbus wore orange paint. Demonstrators around the country have been calling for the removal of statues of Christopher Columbus, saying the Italian explorer is responsible for the genocide and exploitation of native people. The Christopher Columbus statue in Boston defaced, specifically beheaded. In Minneapolis, protesters tied ropes around the neck of a Christopher Columbus statue in Boston defaced, specifically beheaded. In Minneapolis protesters tied ropes around the neck of a Christopher Columbus statue

and they pulled it down. Demonstrators cheering as they brought down a Christopher Columbus statue in Baltimore and it was then dumped into the Baltimore Inner Harbor. Oh, look at that. Columbus is still exploring the oceans. Don't ever stop doing what you love. But guys, look, for real, we need to think about whether it's a good idea

to tear down these statues. Because statues are where the birds poop. What are they supposed to do now? Hold it in? And I feel especially bad for the people who made these statues. You put all that work in, and you don't know if this guy's gonna get canceled in 100 years, that's so unfair. That's why beheading the statue is the best solution,

because you can save the body and just pop on the head of someone else, like Shaq, you see, flawless. But while one group sees tearing down Columbus statues as an attack on their culture. Some you feel they they they they they they they they they they they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they feel they they they they they they they they they th th the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, the, their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theateateat theat theat tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooeate. the. the.their culture. Some here feel like they're the target of reverse racism, arguing we should learn from our past, not erase it. First thing that I learned in third grade, Christopher Columbus discovered America.

So it's an Italian immigrant, okay? But he's telling you we to speak. My Italian history. It's terrible that they would decree something so sacred to us. An attack on Columbus is really a hate crime against Italian Americans. We all remember 9-11. After that faithful, unthinkable day, you remember, right? Red, white, and blue was everywhere. In a respectful sense, this is our 9-11. They're doing the same thing that Columbus did. They're coming in our neighborhood and taking away our heritage, okay?

They're hypocrites. Wow, okay. That's an argument for Columbus. I can safely say I've never heard before. You can't just come in here and destroy our heritage. That's Columbus's thing, no backsees. And by the way, I can't believe that the other that the other the other that the other that the other that the other that the other that that the other that the other the other that the other that that the other that the other that that the other the way, I can't believe that the other guy said that in a respectful sense, this is our 9-11.

Look, man, I don't care how respectfully you put it, you can't compare anything like this to 9-11. Like does this guy go through a drive-through like, excuse me, you forgot my fries. And respectfully, this is my 9-11. Now, you might wonder, why? Why would Italian Americans want to commemorate the worst part of their culture? Like, for instance, I love being black, but I'm not going to put up a statue of OJ in my backyard, especially not while my white friends are there.

But once you hear why those statues actually went up in the first place, you can understand why they are so meaningful to Italian Americans. In the late 1800s, Italian immigrants were arriving in the United States in big numbers, and they faced harsh discrimination. They were treated as perpetual foreigners, and their Catholic beliefs opened the door for even more discrimination. So they embraced Columbus. After all, he was Italian and Catholic and already admired. So he quickly became an icon for Italian immigrants who argued that they too belonged in America.

In 1892, Columbus Day was first brought into the school system. A year later, Columbus became the theme of the World Expo in Chicago, branding him America's hero around the world. As Columbus and his legend became further embedded in American culture, so did the Knights of Columbus, a Catholic social club founded by Italian immigrants. By 1937, the Knights of Columbus had gained enough influence to convince President Roosevelt to proclaim Columbus Day a federal holiday. Yeah.

I know it's easy to forget that today. But there was a time when Italian Americans were badly oppressed in America. And they held up Christopher Columbus as a role model because he put them at the center of America's story, the same way Puerto Ricans hold up Alexander Hamilton. And look, it's hard to reconcile someone's actions when you've built them up so much. Not just as a person, but as a symbol. I mean, just ask anyone who's trying to decide if they can play Michael Jackson's songs at their wedding. But times have changed.

And more and more people are finding it hard to celebrate Columbus, knowing all the bad things that he did. The good news is that times have changed in being persecuted to being some of the country's most powerful politicians, entertainers, and med school cadavers. So, you could replace Columbus with any number of deserving Italians. I mean, just off the top of my head, what if we replaced Columbus with Dr. Anthony Fauci? He's an Italian-American hero, he's beloved and respected by everyone, or at least almost everyone, and he's trying to fight disease

instead of spreading it all over the continent. And best of all, Dr. Fauci's a short guy, so you save on the marble costs. The point is, Americans don't need Christopher Columbus to celebrate the deeper meaning of Columbus Day. Honoring America's immigrant heritage, celebrating Italian culture, and most importantly, getting the day off. It's time for a short break, but don't go away, because when we come back, Alexander Pelosi will tell me if this year really is as crazy as it feels, and I'll be speaking to the hilarious Colin Quinn to find out if it's time to leave New York. Don't go away. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it.

This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts, starting September 17. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. Earlier today, I spoke with documentarian Alexander Pelosi.

We talked about her newest film for showtime, which documents how 2020 is one of the most chaotic and yet transformative years in American history. Alex Pelosi, welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. You have created a film, a documentary about America and what many would say is the most pressing issue going on in the country right now, and that is the protests around the injustice happening across the United States. It seems like an obvious choice now, but you've been working on this for a while. Why did you decide that this was the documentary

you wanted to make today? What is so special about 2020 is it's the year that White America woke up. I didn't know that was gonna be the case. You know, my family went to Selma with John Lewis and common words for that matter. And we, you know, we went for that to commemorate Bloody Sunday and we're talking, we're on this journey to talk about this. the dark past of America. Where we are, I have to tell your audience about this. They now know about this. A year ago, I would have been preaching some sort of old lady history civics. Wow, this is something everybody, it's a language everybody speaks.

So I think we've come a really long way in this year. And I think that that's the one thing that I think people need to, because it's such dark times and it's so hard not to be sad about America right now. Well, there is a little arc of history where we can look at it and say, well, since in the past year, we, you know, we've woken up, we now know about this, and we can now talk about these things. You've been covering the story of protest in America as it gears up for one of the most contentious elections in American history. You also then happened to be outside the White House when the president came out to stage that photo up of him standing in front of the church holding the Bible, where the National Guard shot tear gas canisters at American citizens, something that I think a lot of people didn't even realize was one of the most extreme acts

by America's force on Americans. Exactly. And then, the administration started gasliding us. They said, we didn't use tear gas. Well then, what are those canisters? We didn't use rubber bullets. Well then what are these wounds on my body? I mean, they started completely oh, that wasn't the National Guard. Well, I saw the National Guard with my own two eyes. So they started telling people that were there what they saw wasn't what they saw. And that's the scary part. Let's talk about the the title the title the title the title the title the title. the title. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's.. What's............................................................... the.. the. the. the. the.. the. the.. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the..... the about the title of the documentary.

It's an interesting title. American selfie, One Nation shoots itself. That title is provocative. It has many layers to it. Why do you think the selfie is so important in that? Why do you think the camera phone is so important in telling the story of protest? Well, if you look at the documentary Oscar this year should go to the 17-year-old Goral

who shot George Floyd's murder. You know, I started filming people outside the Apple store lining up to buy, and I'm obviously making fun of them, right? You line up at 5 o'clock in the morning to get a new phone, even thoo what's the point of that? And I was in the beginning, mocking the people that go to such great lengths to take, you know, fall off a cliff at the Grand Canyon to take a perfect selfie. And this totally shallow American culture that's like what it's become. It's

really sort of shameful. But this year it turned. It turned because people took these silly little toys that they had in their hand into weapons that they could use to defend themselves and to document what the treats. And then we could no longer deny it. And the thing that was really important about that video of George Floyd's murder is that it was the whole thing. It was a documentary in it itself. You got to watch, you go go go go go go go go go go go the line the line the line the line the line the line the line line online and watch the whole thing from the beginning to end because other people have been killed by police, but you can say, well you didn't see what happened before or you didn't see what happened after.

That's what made the story different is that people got the full, there was, it reduced the amounts of deniability that people often have. Right. And that's a really important turning point in the course of human history that we are now. I'm still torn about the whole thing also though because social media is doing such. I mean, I think it's completely undermining our democracy. And so the conversation has gone to such low points. And everybody's gone so tribal and into their own bubbles and everybody. There's all this hay speech and it their own bubbles and everybody's inserted. There's all this hay speech and it's back to how our administration has gaslighting us.

You know, if you watch our president will say, oh it's all Antifa, you know, out at the protest and you want to say, I saw families, I saw college kids, I saw children with, I saw pets. You know, there were millions of Americans out there protesting. It wasn't just, you know, a few, yes, there were a few bad apples like there, like, there were a few bad apples, like, there are a few bad apples, like, there aren't every, right? But the important point is that everybody was out there, the two sides like to say it's broad, their. They never get talked about. Before I let you go, I would be remiss if I didn't bring up the fact that your mom is

the most powerful woman in America. As Nancy Pelosi's daughter, how do you think your views in and around politics and documenting politics are shaped? Like, do you think you've been able to create your own filter and your own lens on how you see the world? And if so, how did you do that you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th th th th th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that- that- that- that- thatu thatu thatu thatu that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that., that, that, that, that. that, that, that, that, you think you've been able to create your own filter and your own lens on how you see the world? And if so, how did you do that? I've gone out of my way in the last 30 years as a journalist and filmmaker to go into what they call Real America. And it was really important for me because I grew up in San Francisco, you know, in sort of the liberal bubble, I always wanted to see, because I like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to so so soff so to to so. to soff sooom, and if so so. so. so. so. so. so. And if so so. And if so so. And if so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so, and if so so, and if so so, and if so so, and if so the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. tooom. the toe. tooom, toe. tooom, toe. so, so, so, so, so, so, in sort of the liberal bubble, I always wanted to see, because I like to tell my kids all the time, like, what if we're wrong about everything? If you

leave New York City, people will tell you, you're wrong about everything. And I like to be reminded of that all the time so that I don't lose my mind. The only way I can stay saying is by talking to people who aren't like me me me like th like th like th like th like th like th like th like th like the like the the the the the the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I to to to to to to to to be to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I to be to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I. I the. I the. I the. I theateate. theateate. I theateate. I toldld to to to to to told to to to to to the to to my mind. The only way I can stay saying is by talking to people who aren't like me that don't believe anything that I believe in and just trying to give them the benefit of the doubt, and I think that they're more purple people out there than were led to believe by Cable News, because cable news isn't the business of just making us hate each other. Social media is in the business of making us hate each other.

So it's good to go out there and meet people and try and understand where they're coming from. Well, I recommend that everyone watches this documentary to understand not just where everyone's coming from, but where the country is headed to as well. Alex Pelosi, thank you so much for joining us on the show. Thank you so much for having me. All right, when we come back, I'll be talking to the legendary comedian, Colin Quinn. Don't go away. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.

But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to the Daily Social Distancing Show. Earlier today I spoke with comedian Colin Quinn.

We talked about his new book where he roasts all 50 states and he tells us whether New York is really dead. Check it out. Colin Quinn, welcome to the Daily Social Distancing Show. Thank you very much, Trevor. I miss you, my friend. It's been a long time since I've seen you. We haven't been doing stand-up in clubs. We haven't been doing stand-up on the road. How are you coping with, I mean, the thing that you've been doing your entire life, just not existing in the way that it did before?

It's been very strange. I, you know, I'm gracefully moving into my final years. I I I I I look. I look. I look. I look out. I the window. I look out. I the window. I the window. I the window. I the window. I look. I'm the window. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th. thea, I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thtimes a day to check on the stores in the street. So obviously, that's replaced stand-up for me. You in my opinion are the definition and the epitome of a New Yorker. You've seen every kind of New York. You've got one of the greatest bits about how New York has gentrified and how it's changed over the years. So then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, the the the the their, their, their, tho, thi. thi. thi. thi. tho, tho, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, that's, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. I I I I's thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's throwne. that's throwne. the years. So then Colin Quinn, I have a question for you that only you can answer in my world. Do you think New York is dead?

Um, I would say it's, it's definitely, uh, in as bad shape as I've ever seen it. It's a different kind of bad, like at the 70s, it was a more crowded, violent band. Now it's a deserted, I've never seen it this quiet before, and in some ways, I thought the subways would be cleaner and it would rejuvenate like Venice. You know, the fish came back to the canals, but no, the subways have eight people on it, and they still smell like as if it's packed every day.

It's remarkable. I am happy, not just for you, but for you tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to the to the the to be, to be, the the to be, the too, too, too, too, too, the too, the the the too, too, too, too, too, too, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the...., thean, thean, thean, thean, tooan, together, together, tooa, tooa, too., tooooooooom., tooomorrow, fans out there, that you have a book that I think can hold us over until we get past this thing, because your book overstated a coast-to-coast roast of the United States is essentially, you know, an extended version of the show that was critically acclaimed on Broadway, and you've done a ton of research, it's like a historical book, like pot roast, part history book. As someone who's done the work, do you think the state of the union is strong? I don't think anybody thinks that. I mean, this country is, you know, where a bad marriage that needs counseling, you know what I mean? If it was up to me, there would be constitutional conventions every year

because this is critical. And, but it would have to be like the constitutional convention, they didn't allow any press in because you realize, once everyone gives their opinion, you're parallel, there's a paralysis because, so if anybody tries to do anything, everybody jumps in immediately. So until it's, you know what I mean? I believe in a secret, the thing Americans hate the most, no transparency. So if you could change America, based on everything you've done, what you would do is have people

meet to talk about the Constitution more, wave, like just like a real emergency meeting every few years, go through it, but no press, no cameras, no talk, just like come out and be like, I, this is what the new constitution is going to be about. Yes, because it's too, I would get the smartest thinkers, not necessarily politicians, but real thinkers from each thing and then do like the mass singer. So you can't see them and they distort their voice. So you, so, so, so, so, their, so, their, their, so, their, their, so, so, their, their, their, their, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, is is is is is is. So. So, is. So, is. So, is. So, is. So, is. So, is, is, is, is. So, is. So, is, is, is. their, they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. them. And so basically the person comes out, makes suggestions, and then after we see if we've selected the suggestion, they take their hat off, and then we're like, oh my God, Ted Cruz. That was actually quite a liberal suggestion. And he goes, yeah, I was afraid to say it because I've been maintaining this image of being a douchebag.

That's basically what you're saying. You have Robin Thick and Jenny McCarthy will be the judges on this thing too. As you've gone through the states, you have a deep love for the states, you have a deep love for the country, because you've been on the ground. You know, that's something that I love about being a stand-up is, man, we've been to the best and worst parts of every single state in America. You know, we've eaten at the shistinnest, their their staest, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. You. th. You. You. You. And, th. And, th. And, the the the the the the the the the their. And, their. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thr. And, thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thea. thr. thea. thea. thea. th. th. And, diners and the best restaurants. You have an interesting perspective on this country. What are some of your favorite places that you've gone to where you go like, man, that place gets a bad rap, but it truly is a gem? Well, I mean, Florida, I'm in love with Florida, even though it deserves its bad rap.

It deserves it, but I still love it. Because it's like, some states are just America's unconscious and Florida is one of those places where they're just like hey we're not pretending to be anything noble come down here we're decadent we don't care if you're 25 come down we'll get your job as a DJ dealing drugs bartending and then you just party the rest of your life so I like the honesty of Florida. As somebody who's told jokes to every type of audience, you've always talked about America's political divide. When you talk to somebody who you feel like you've lost in your life to politics,

like a lot of people talk about this, I've lost my family members, I've lost my friends. We used to disagree, but now we've cut each other off completely. Have you cut them off or have to break thr th th th th th th th th the way their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their through with them. No, no, I don't cut anybody off, but I just, I tell, you know, I just say, listen, I think you're refusing to see, you're refusing any middle ground, and this whole country, the only thing it has is compromise. That's the only thing it has. Compromise. And without that, you don't have, it's going to be a civil war, you know, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, the, the, and, and, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th.. th. to, to, to, to, to, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, you know, and everybody knows it, but nobody, people get, you know, people get into that space where they agree, how could you agree 100% with either Democrat or Republican,

how could you coincidentally agree 100% with an agenda of anything? I don't even agree 100% with my own feelings? How could you do that with some party or some idea? It's bizarre to me. Yeah, I think it's become like that because people are forced in America to choose one of two. Do you know what I'm saying? So if you only have one of two options, it's going to create a permanent divide because basically what you do, it's like cable packages. You go like, I don't want some these other channels, but I watch sports, so I'm going to take to take th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thake th th th thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thake thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I th i th. I th. I th. I th i th i thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I thin. I thi. I thin. I thin. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I don't want some of these other channels but I watch sports so I'm going to take this package but I don't want that package. I don't want that package. I don't want everything else. It forces people to do that though because you've only got two parties in America so you're going to have two people who are pitted against each other which is the perfect analogy is it and it's like it's like it leads to conflict

That's why there's two boxers in a boxing match if they had three or four Maybe I got away or after a while, leave it below all I can't watch out with this guy The pandemic has been a nightmare for stand-up. It's been a nightmare for audiences in every field. It doesn't matter. Live performances are just shut down. We've seen people trying to do something new during this period. And stand-ups, I mean, I've tried everything. Shows on Zoom, shows on Instagram, you know, shows in the park. You are one of the pioneers in that world as well because if I understand correctly, you've shot a stand-up special, but it's also like partly a documentary. It's this whole hybrid thing. And you're doing stand-up at a drive-in? At a drive-in in Brooklyn.

And of course, your buddy Keith is there, being very obstreperous. You know, I brought in all those seller comedians, so they spend the whole time basically complaining and being ungrateful. When I called them, they're like, oh, that's great, thank you. When they get there, they just trash me and the whole experience the entire time. But we caught a lot of it on film, which is good, you know? What do you hope to achieve with this? Because I know you're a very methodical person.

What are you trying that we can get so Irritive like even this special they come in like they've been working the whole time Just trash in me trashing the whole thing, but that's what we love like like like if comedian doesn't make fun of you they don't like you. Well, I think I think I think you're gonna capture it my thin' I think people are gonna th th, th, I you you th, I th th you th th th th th you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th you th th you the the the the the the the thin' thi thi the the the you the the you the you're the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thin thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they capture it, my friend. I think people are going to love it. I think people are going to love the book, because you've done the research, you tell the jokes, you're unfiltered, and it's the best opinionated thing I've ever read. So, Colin, thank you so much for joining me on the show again. Good luck out there. theed the is coming up in many states. If you

haven't registered yet or you aren't sure if you have registered, time is running out to make sure that you can vote in November. All you need to do is go to vote vote vote vote.com to check your registration status and see your boating options. Until tomorrow stay safe out there, wear a mask and remember onions are sexy. No! I mean social distance. Don't forget to, damn it. The Daily Show with CoverNoa, ears edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11,

10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show. Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. And subscribe to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content and more. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes.

It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th.

Wherever you get your podcasts.