The Daily Show: Ears Edition - This Week's Top Stories - Matt Gaetz's Venmo History, Joe Manchin's Power & Driving While Black

Episode Date: April 18, 2021

Rep. Matt Gaetz's Venmo transactions come under scrutiny, Sen. Joe Manchin emerges as a major obstacle to President Biden's agenda, and Trevor examines the dangers of driving while Black. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17th. Sad news for the British royal family and no they didn't get another black grandchild. I'm talking about the death of Prince Philip at age 99 and as

heartbroken as I'm sure you were it was nothing compared to how some people felt. For a tribe in the Pacific Islands Prince Philip's death is also difficult. Villagers believed him to be a god and he maintained a relationship with them for decades. On ana, one of dozens of islands that make up the Pacific nation of Vanuatu, it's a place of mourning right now. For a prince, half a world away. For the past 50 years, villagers here have regarded Prince Philip as a god. And Philip, known at times for his off-color remarks and gaffs,

maintained a respectful relationship with them. Over several decades, sending them gifts, some were even invited for a visit to the UK. Anthropologists say there was a legend in Vanuatu in the 60s that a pale-skin son of a mountain god would travel across the seas and marry a rich and powerful woman. Villagers would have likely seen pictures of Philip and the Queen in government offices. Somehow the connection stuck. That's right. While to many people Prince Philip was just that mean dude on the crown, to these

Pacific Islanders, he was literally a god. And I know that may seem silly, but honestly, it's not any weirder than how the British saw him. Oh my God, these silly villages. He's not a god. He's a prince, which is a real thing that we didn't make up. My only issue with Philip being a god is that the guy said a lot of racist and xenophobic things over the years. I mean, how do they deal with that in church every Sunday? We will now read from the book of Philip. Okay, not that page. Maybe the, okay, no, no,

not that one. You know, let's just go straight to communion. Fish and chips for everyone. Now, you know, the thing I found interesting is that they chose him as their god, because their legend said a god with pale skin would marry a rich woman. And if that's true, well then good news guys, because I have found a new god for you. You know what's going to be awkward? As if Prince Charles tries to take his dad's place now, well now that my father is gone, I guess you will be looking for a new deity. Ah, you know what, we're good. We're just gonna convert to Buddhism. Thank you, though.

Moving on now to political news. Matt Gates, Florida Congressman and Fraternity brother who wants to show you something in his room has been under fire since news broke of him being under investigation over possible sex trafficking. But like a Karen, in a bath and body works, he refuses to back down. Tonight. Tonight. Tonight. Tonight. Tonight. Tonight, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the their, to to to to to to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. their. their. their. their. their, their the, the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. toooooooooo. I. I. the, in a bath and bodyworks, he refuses to back down. Tonight, Florida Congressman Matt Gates defiant. I'm built for the battle and I'm not going anywhere.

The House Ethics Committee launching a new bipartisan investigation into Gates, examining allegations of sexual misconduct, illicit drug use and accusations that the congressman may have shared inappropriate and explicit images on the house floor. The Justice Department investigating whether Gates and his associate Joel Greenberg paid women who were allegedly recruited online for sex and travel. According to the Daily Beast, Gates sent Joel Greenberg $900 in two late-night Venmo transactions in 2018. Greenberg used the same app to send three young women, including one who had recently turned 18, varying sums of money that amounted to $900. Greenberg made the payments to the three

young women with the descriptions tuition, school, and school. Okay, we have to wait for all the facts to come in. But you have to agree, this is not a good look for Matt Gates. He Venmose $900 to his sleazy friend, three, three, three, three, three, three, th, three, to th, th, th, th, to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the the the their, the the their, the their, their, their, their, their, $ $ $ $ $ $1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thin, thean, look for Matt Gates. He venmos $900 to his sleazy friend, and then that same friend, Venmoves it to three young women for tuition? $300? For tuition? Yo, this is how much college education you can afford with $300. Welcome everybody to Physics 1. But at the same time, it looks like Matt Gates is so stupid that he might have paid girls for sex on Venmo. I mean, you think you know a guy.

And then it turns out, yeah, you're totally right. You do know him. You know him pretty well. Now, the reason I don't think it was for tuition is because he wrote tuition. People. Nobody writes the real things thing thing thing things things things thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. That thi. That thi thi thi thi that that that that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that he that that that that that that that that th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. don't think it was for tuition is because he wrote tuition. People. Nobody writes the real thing for a Venmo payment, all right? You always write something funny or weird, like for butt medicine. If these guys wanted to hide that they were paying for sex, they should have actually written money for sex. Then people would have be like, well obviously the money wasn't for sex. It was probably for his butt medicine. And honestly, most people don't even use actual words on Venmo. Right? You just use emoges. You'd think a guy who hangs out with teens would know that.

And emogees actually make the most sense if you're trying to cover something up. That's how I got away with clown-faced, Belgian flags, sushi dolphin Let's check in now on Iran, the last country that America needs to get tick-tac-toe. Iran has been racing to enrich as much uranium as it can, while talks over its nuclear program continue. But it just hit a bit of a snag. A developing story overseas concerning Iran's nuclear program. An incident at one of Iran's uranium enriched sites triggered a power outage and there are suggestions that Israel is behind the sabotage.

It comes a day after Iran started testing its newest, most advanced nuclear centrifuge. American intelligence officials say the site could be out of business for months. Iran may be pointing the finger directly to Israel, but Israel is not officially commenting as of yet on what happened. However, we have seen some possible hints in the last 24 hours. Israeli media, for their part, are citing unnamed sources saying that it was the Israeli Massad agency behind this attack. And we've seen some comments from Israeli officials that seem to hint at some sort of involvement. Damn, again?

They did this again. Yo, how does Israel keep wrecking Iran's shit like this? They sabotaged the centrifuges, they assassinated scientists, and now they shut down an entire plant? I mean, we know they probably have people on the inside. You don't need to be a genius to figure that out. But now, I'm starting to think that Iran's entire nuclear program is just Israeli spies. I mean, it's probably a giveaway that they gave everyone the day off for Passover.

That was probably a sign, right? But apparently, this blackout was an incredibly complicated operation. You see, what they did was, Israeli agents took the whole nuclear site and plugged it into the Texas power grid. Honestly, they may never get it back online. The one silver lining for Iranian nuclear scientists is that they can always blame Israel if they screw up on the job. You're two hours late for work, Paviz! Arjahan, it's not my fault. Israel forgot to set my alarm clock. Oh, okay, then don't worry about it. Oh, and by the way, Israel Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, Israel, thiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. the the the, tha. tha. They th clock. Oh, okay, then don't worry about it.

Oh, and by the way, Israel ate your yogurt from the fridge. Ugh, those Israelis. America's infrastructure is crumbling faster than a Nature Valley bar, which is why Joe Biden has released an ambitious plan to rebuild. His new infrastructure bill covers not just roads and bridges, but also manufacturing, high-speed internet, green energy, and even home health care for the elderly. And yeah, I know that that last one isn't really infrastructure, but come on. You know, Biden had to throw a little something in there for himself, you know what I mean?

So this bill would be a huge investment in America. But because it costs more than $2 trillion and might actually help people, no Republican senators are expected to vote for it. The good news for Biden is that this is one of those bills that the Democrats could pass with a simple majority, which they do have in the Senate. The bad news is, one of those votes has to be Joe Mansion, West Virginia Senator and Owl on a job interview. And right now Joe Mansion isn't too happy with the bill.

Joe Manchin might be a roadblock to the infrastructure plan. The one man who may control the fate of President Biden's agenda is not making life easy for his fellow Democrats. Senator Joe Mansion has continued to rail against a 28% proposed corporate tax hike to pay for this thin. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And thi thi thi the thi the the thi the the the thi the the thi the tho the tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho the tho tho tho tho too to to rail against a 28% proposed corporate tax hike to pay for this thing. He thinks this will be broken up into three bills because one of the big arguments is that some things like child care and housing aren't technically infrastructure. Look, he is that 50th vote for Democrats. And Chuck Schumer, the majority leader, can't pass anything that Biden

sends over without Joe Manchin. You hear that? The entire fate of this infrastructure bill rests in the meaty hands of Joe Manchon. And it's not just infrastructure. If Joe Biden wants anything passed, from gun control to raising the minimum wage, to making the Varburton, the host of jeopardy, he has to raising the minimum wage to making the Barb Burton the host of Jeopardy he has to get Joe Manion on board. Basically if the Democrats of Brittany Spears the Joe Manchon is their dad which makes

Joe Mansion the most powerful person in America. Well second to the guy at CVS who is the key to the razor shelf. But who is Joe Mansion? And more importantly why is Joe Manc-Mansion? Well? He he, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, he, th, he, he, he, th, he has th, he has to, he has to to to to to to th th to to to to to to to to to to to to to to he he he he he he he he has he he has he he has he he has he, he has he he has to to to to to to he, he has he, he has th, he has th, he has th, he has th, he has th, he has th, he has th, he has th th th th th th th the, he has the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the key to the razor shelf. But who is Joe Manchin? And more importantly, why is Joe Manchin? Well, let's find out in our brand new segment. Please allow me to introduce yourself. Joe Manchin first rose to prominence as the governor of West Virginia, before getting elected to the Senate in 2010. And while all senators talk about reaching across the aisle, Manchin has made it a personal

mission. Joe Manchin believes in working across the aisle and has relationships. He wants to focus on trying to get Democrats and Republicans to work in the same room. He has been part of some kind of legislation that can get work in the same room. He has been part of some bipartisan groups that have been trying to come up with some kind of legislation that can get support in the Senate from both parties. Republican Senators Susan Collins of Maine

and Democratic Senator Joe Manchin of West Virginia. They are the newly announced honorary co-chairs of no labels, a group advocating bipartisan solutions in Washington. Everything No Labels does is in a bipartisan way. It's not from one side ideologically or the other. We're in the radical middle. That's right! Joe Manchin is in the radical middle! He'll eat extra vanilla ice. Woo! Now crank up the edge herein and make a reasonable bottom noise! I will say, the term radical middle is a great way to trick your friends into riding bitch, isn't

it? Ooh, the middle back seat. Oh, so radical. Both of your legs are going to be touching one of ours. Ho ho! But if I'm completely honest here, Mansion is kind of right. It is radical to be in the middle during this time in American politics. I mean, Democrats and Republicans are further apart than my nipples were after that botched boob job. So the fact that he can agree with both sides, that's extreme. It's kind of like being a robot who's also Amish. We are simple people who believe in the old ways. But even if the working across the aisle is going out of fashion in Washington, it makes

Manchin very popular in West Virginia. Although he's also popular there because he looks out for his people's interests, whether it's defending their coal mines or their reputations. MTV's newest reality show, Buckwhal has been described as a Jersey Shore Appalachia. One thing these shows have in common, they stir up controversy before they go on the air. As Chip Reed reports, a senator from West Virginia is condemning the new program's view of his home state. Well, no way, shape or form is this reality, and definitely not reality in West Virginia.

If it was your state, and these were your children, how would you feel about it? Okay, first of all, I'm not sure that this is the best argument to make if you care about your state's tourism industry. Don't believe the reality show. This place is boring a shit. But also, mansion can relax. Because everyone is fully aware that reality TV isn't reality. I mean, think about it. The bachelorette makes dating seem like you go zip-lining with a woman and 30 other guys.

That's not real. Everyone knows that dating is really just grabbing dinner with a woman and 30 other guys. Ain't nobody's zip-lining. But fighting for his state wouldn't be enough if Joe Manchin supported standard democratic policies. Because don't forget, West Virginia is an extremely conservative state. So anyone who wants to get elected there has to be pretty conservative too. And Joe Manchin definitely is.

He'd actually said that he regretted supporting Hillary Clinton, said he might be open to supporting Donald Trump in 2020 if he agrees with him on a number of issues. Joe Manchin tweeting this, quote, defund the police, defund my butt. He opposed some of President Obama's energy policies and has supported gun rights. When President Trump brought a bipartisan group of the White House, Manchin, Senator Manchin from West Virginia is the first Democrat to say, all right, I'm on board, I want a wall.

I'll cut federal spending, and I'll repeal the bad parts of Obamacare. I sue DPA, and I'll take dead aim at the cap and trade bill. Okay, first of all, can we just stop this thing where politicians shoot bills in their ads? It's tacky. It's also kind of disrespectful to the staff at King Cows. But it's people like Joe Manion that make you realize America needs more than two major parties. Because he doesn't seem to to to to to to to the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same the same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same the same the same same the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. to to to to to to the same. to the same. the same. the same into either one. I mean, think about it. Joe Manchin is in the same party as AOC. Imagine if other industries work like this. Like to have a career in

music, you had to either join B.T.S. or the Wu Tang clan. I mean, Billy Ililish is like, but I don't fit into either of those. You gotta choose, Billy, you gotta choose. So, Manchin is in the Democratic Party, but he doesn't really get along with the Democratic Party. In fact, I'm sure there are moments that get really tense when he walks by the Democrats in the cafeteria. There's probably one seat left empty at the table, and Bernie always puts his giant mittens on it. I'm once once again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again again once again asking you to sit somewhere else. So, Joe Manchin is pushing conservative ideas

and preventing Democrats from passing their bills. The question is, then, why do they put up with him? Do they love his homemade gaspaccio? Is he the only tenor in the Senate Barbershop Quartet? Or could he be the only Democrat with the upper body strength to open a pickle jar? No, it's mostly because when it comes to Democrats from West Virginia, he's the best they're ever going to get. Joe Manson, coming from a state that Donald Trump won with 68% of the vote. He's the only Democrat who could win in West Virginia.

So therefore, he's sort of an immovable object. Joe Manchin is one of the 50 Democratic votes. He's the only Democrat who can get elected to the Senate from West Virginia. And so they got deal with Joe Manchin. Yeah. Joe Manchin may be a pain in the ass who wants everything done his way, but without him, the Democrats wouldn't have a majority at all. And then, they wouldn't get anything past. He's like that annoying kid on your block who

had a pool. Yeah he hogged all the noodles and wouldn't let anyone use the diving board but without him there's no pool party and then you're just running through the sprinkler like a little bitch. So that's Joe Mansion. Party Poopper, radically boring and the most powerful man in America. And you might not like him, you might wish he was someone else, but if you don't want all the roads and bridges to collapse, well, you've got to get in his pool. Afghanistan, the country that much like the bathroom at a chilly cookoff is almost always occupied. The United States has now been in Afghanistan for nearly 20 years.

And today, President Joseph Retreat Biden said enough is enough. President Biden announcing he will withdraw all U.S. troops from Afghanistan by September 11th. We cannot continue the cycle of extending or expanding our military presence in Afghanistan, hoping to create ideal conditions for the withdrawal and expecting a different result. I'm now the fourth United States president to preside over American true presidents in Afghanistan. I will not pass this responsibility onto a fifth.

I will not pass this responsibility to the next president. Wow! What a nice gift Joe Biden is giving to Dwayne the Rock Johnson when he becomes president. Although to be honest, I was secretly hoping that the rock would get to end the war in Afghanistan. Yeah, because he would have done it in style. But yes, the war in Afghanistan may finally be over. And people, it's about time.

It's been, what, 19 years? No war should ever be old enough to serve in itself. I will say, though, I find a little weird that Biden is withdrawing on 9-11. I mean, first of all, breaking up on your anniversary, that's just mean, and second, should he be basing huge decisions like this on the date that just sounds the best? We can't let this forever war continue one more moment. But let's wait a few more months for some nice symmetry. You know, it's numbers. I believe in numbers. Now, of course, all of this is assuming that America actually does leave.

Because don't forget, America has been trying to get out of Afghanistan for, what, 10 years now. Obama said it, Trump said it, hell, this guy said it. We are leaving in 2014, period. To be fair, Biden didn't know what year it was when he said that. Now obviously not everyone is celebrating this decision. Biden is getting a lot of criticism from people who say that if America leaves Afghanistan, then it will become a failed state. And that tho o o o o o o o o o o o o o ooo, tho, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, because thi, thi, because thi, thi, because thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, because thi, because thi, because thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, because, because, because, thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to t to to to te to to te to toda. te today, today become a failed state. And that is a real danger. But on the other hand, America has been there for 20 years. Is it supposed to stay there forever?

Because if that's going to be the case, then I mean, America should at least make Afghanistan a US state. And the good news with that is it would eliminate Afghanistan's terrorism problem completely. Because we all know that once terrorists are American, they're not terrorists anymore. They're just frustrated citizens who are having a bad day. Moving on to sports news.

The Minnesota Timberwolves are the best team in the NBA named after puppy dogs. And now, they're getting to know their new owner. Former MLB Star Alex Rodriguez is reportedly part of a new ownership group for the NBA's Minnesota Timberwolves. Here's what the team's 19-year-old Rookie of the Year candidate, Anthony Edwards, said about A-Rod's ownership bid when he was asked about it by reporters yesterday. Watch. Do you have any thoughts about him? Are you an A-Rod fan at all growing up or anything like that? What you he what he might bring to the team? A fan? Which is he? The baseball player? Alex Rodriguez? Yeah, no, I don't know what it is. Okay. I know he's gonna be the owner but I don't I don't know about baseball.

Rodriguez took the opportunity to introduce himself to Ed Rundz in a post on Instagram writing hi Anthony. Hi thony thony thony thony thony thony thony thian, thian, thian, th an th an th an th an th an th an th an than, than, than, I I I I I'm than, I'm than, I'm than an than an than, I'm than, I'm thanan, I'm thiann, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I's, thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. th. th. th. thin, th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. th. th. th. thin. th. th. th. th. th. th. the opportunity to introduce himself to Ed Ritz and a post on Instagram, writing, Hi, Anthony, I'm Alex. Oh, okay, okay, this is embarrassing, but let's give the guy a break. I mean, he's 19. You know, there are some things that 19-year-olds today just don't know about. Like, either of these things could be to know every middle-aged famous person, except Matt Gates, because his photo is posted at the security desk in everyone's dorm. And to be honest, it could have been worse for this kid. I mean, at least A-Rod wasn't actually there. God knows, I've been in situations where I was talking to a famous person and I didn't know

who they were. Thank you so much for joining me, Mr. Buddy. I am very happy to be here with you, Trevor. I have to say, I am a big fan of your music. Yeah, I found out afterwards. That guy is on a podcast. And finally, some good news for all full-time parents looking to get back into the non-childcare job market.

You can now update your resume. LinkedIn is making changes to catch up with popular demand. Mothers and fathers who have stopped working to become caregivers will now have a way to reflect that on their LinkedIn accounts. The company added titles like stay-at-home-bomb or dad and remove the need to link that title to a company or employer. Thank you. If you ask me, this is long overdue. Stay at home moms and dads should also have the opportunity to have LinkedIn do absolutely nothing for them. Seriously though, stay at home parents deserve this recognition because before

if you were home raising your kids, your resume just look like you were unemployed for like a chunk of years. But parenting is a job. I mean, it's one of this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this is this is this. This is this is this is this. This is this is this is this is this is a this is long, this is long, this is long, this is long, this is long, this is long, this is long this is long this is long this is long this is long this is long this is long this is long this is this is long this is long this is long, this is long this is long, this is long this is long, this is long, this is long, this is long, this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is long this is long this this th. This is long th. This is long tho. This is long tho. This is long this this this this this this this this this is long this this this this is long this is long this this tho. th Before, if you were home raising your kids, your resume just looked like you were unemployed for like a chunk of years. But parenting is a job. I mean, it's one of the hardest jobs actually. It's also the only job where if your boss pees on you, you can't sue them. I will say, as good as this is, employers still have to be careful and make sure that they get all the details. Because a candidate who's a stay-at-home mom to two young kids, that could be a great

employee. But a candidate who's a stay-at-home mom to 17 cats? That's a red flag. Not to mention, this could be bad news for some kids. Because now their moms could get hired away to be another kid's mom. Mommy, don't go. I love you. Oh, I love you too, honey. But Susie's giving me dental, so I'm out. It has been another week in America, which means it's been another week of black people being harassed or killed by the police. And by now, everybody's aware of what happened to Dante Wright and Lieutenant Nazario. And although each incident ended very differently, they both began the same way. It's the same way that many of these encounters begin, with a traffic stop.

And for black people in America, these traffic stops are scarier than any Jordan Peele movie. Driving while black. In many US cities, police officers are pulling black drivers over at a much higher rate than white drivers. Black drivers are far more likely than white ones to have guns pointed at them by police to be detained, handcuffed, searched, and arrested. Those blue and red cherries come on behind you, you all of a sudden get a tingle, your heart starts to race even when you know you've done nothing.

There is not a moment that goes by when police are riding behind me where I don't fear being pulled over. The fear of driving while black is always present, even in life's happier moments, like when Rona Vega's 18-year-old son, Teji, won a car on the price is right. It was so surreal, so much joy and excitement, and then reality set in, my 18-year-old black, Latino son does not need a car.

And what's going to be the problems that he's going to encounter? God damn. Think about how messed up it is, that the only way a black person would be happy about winning a car on the price is if it came with a white person to drive it for them. I mean, no one should be afraid that th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their the on the price is right is if it came with a white person to drive it for them. I mean, no one should be afraid that they'll be killed because of something they won on the price's right, other than maybe one of those pontoon boats.

Those things are death traps. I'm pretty sure you're only allowed to drive them if you're drunk. But this just shows you how getting th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. It's why Vin Diesel is always the main character in Foster and the Furious movies. You can't have Tyrese pulled over for a busted tail light when you're trying to drive out of a skyscraper. And you might be thinking, well, if you're so scared of being pulled over, then don't do anything wrong.

Yeah, but let's be honest people. always give the police an excuse to pull someone over. Oh, I think you were going too fast. I think you were going too slow. Oh, your seatbelt, your tail light, your license plate, your registration, not signaling, tinted windows. And nothing is more suspicious than someone breaking zero rules in their car. Ooh, cops will pull you over instantly. Sir, I couldn't help noticing that you were driving perfectly, and that was a little little little little little honest. Why don't you go ahead and pop the trunk? But it's not just traffic stops. Every encounter between a police officer and a black person is fraught with danger.

In fact, there's something in black families called the talk. And I don't know if my white viewers know about this. I mean, maybe it's one of those things that black people do that you've never heard the the the the the Jordans when it rains. But believe me, every black family knows what the talk is. We call it the talk. A discussion black parents have had with their children for generations. A conversation that you and I have to have that, that it is tad amount to their survival. Alerting children about interactions with police where body language tone of voice, word choice and other factors in certain circumstances can lead to arrest or worse.

At some point, you will get pulled over, and here is how you act. Put your hands on the steering wheel, make sure the lights are on. Don't do anything without police permission. Ask before you get your registration. You don't question and challenge the police officers like everybody else can. You guys just have to be a little wiser in terms of how you communicate and not agitate the situation any more than it is.

Submit, obey, come home. The talk will always happen in black households. You have the talk about the situation any more than it is. Submit, obey, come home. The talk will always happen in black households. You have to talk about the birds and the bees, and then you have to talk about how to deal with law enforcement. That's right. Police violence is such a threat that somehow the most uncomfortable talk you have to have with your kids is the one where you don't use the word semen. And look, I know that all parents talk to their kids about how to stay safe. But for black people, it's specifically about staying safe from the police.

The people whose job is supposedly to keep them safe. The police talk simply isn't something that occurs in white households. I mean, if it did, it would be a very different conversation. Okay now, honey, if you ever get pulled over by a police officer, what do you do? You look him in the eye and you say, do you know who I am? And then he'll apologize and it'll let you be on your way. And by the way, it's not like kids hear the talk when they're 18. The saddest part about this talk is that because police have a history history history history history history history year olds like adults who have committed heinous crimes, parents have to give the talk to their kids when they are extremely young.

As a mom, I've always taught my children to, you know, be strong, say what you want to say, you know, if there's freedom of speech, and I'm telling you to do just the opposite. I hated to have that with a 10-year-old, but I gotta do what was necessary. Eight years old, you didn't think that was kind of young? Oh, I absolutely think it's young, but not too early. We've talked about it ever since he became about four and a half feet tall, so it's been years now. If you wait until somebody is 12, 12, 12, th 13, to 12,'s it's really, it can be really difficult. It's definitely wrong that we have to go to this, but also like we have to remember that to take in stride if we want

to get to where we want to be in life. If I don't listen and understand I could potentially be one of those in a video. We actually have a line that we do at our house. We practice this thing. What is it? I'm Ariel Sky Williams. I'm eight years old. I'm unarmed, and I have nothing that will hurt you. An eight-year-old girl, people. What's even more wild than an eight-year-old having to memorize a script to interact with the police is the fact that a fully grown, armed, and armored police officer would feel threatened by

an eight-year-old girl. I can tell you, I haven't felt threatened by an eight-year-old since I was like, I don't know, 15. I was a very small child. You know, when you think about it, black people have more education around policing than actual police. Like no cop starts training at eight years old. I mean maybe kids play cops and robbers but that's actually terrible training. No? Because I've never seen a cops and robbers game that ends in a peaceful arrest. Yeah, they're just

raining pew pews all around the neighborhood. So we know that black people know what's at stake and have methods of how to handle being pulled over by the police, but the talk still hasn't been able to prevent police violence against black people. So, maybe it's not black people who need a talk about how to act around the police. Maybe, just maybe, police need a talk about how to act around black people. Before we go, please consider supporting Hunger Ward's efforts to assist the Yemeni clinics featured in the film. Together with their non-profit partner, Globio, Hunger Ward is helping health care workers in those clinics provide vital care to children

who are facing extreme malnutrition. So please, if you can help out in any way, go to the link below and donate whatever you can. The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show, today. to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content and more.

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