The Daily Show: Ears Edition - This Week's Top Stories - Oil Spil, Religious Exemptions for Vaccines & Meghan Trainor's Toilets

Episode Date: October 9, 2021

A huge oil spill occurs off the West Coast, Americans seek religious exemptions from vaccine mandates, and Meghan Trainor installs two toilets in her bathroom to use alongside her husband. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Min Like, none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts.

The Democratic Party. They fight just as much as the real housewise of Atlanta, only they get less done. For months now, President Biden has been trying to pass a major spending bill that includes every single priority for the Democrats, funding child care, tackling climate change, organizing a search party to find Kamala Harris. But the bill is being blocked by two senators, Joe Manchin and Kirsten Cinema. And after weeks of negotiations, tensions are getting really high. Frustration on Capitol Hill, as lawmakers still can't come to a deal on President Biden's

government overhaul spending plan. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi delayed a vote saying there was not enough support. At least two Democrats opposed the plan. They say $3.5 trillion is simply too costly. Protesters arrived by small boats and kayaks at Mansions' houseboat in Washington, D.C. to voice their frustrations. On Sunday in Arizona, activists followed Senator Kierston's cinema into a ladies room, angered by her opposition to a $3.5 trillion social policy bill. We need solutions to build that better plan.

We knocked on doors for you to get you elected. And just how we got you elected, we can get you out of office if you don't support what you promised us. Wow. I don't know about you guys, but like I'm all for holding officials accountable. On the other hand, though, I think following someone into a bathroom at work might be a step too far. I mean, the office bathroom is a sanctuary, you know.

It's a little oasis, but you can just take a few minutes out of your day to do your business. Check your phone, you know, watch an entire season of squid game. And you know who really impresses me is all those people who are using the bathroom while this was going on. I can't th really really really really really really really really really really really really really really th th th th th th th th th th th tho th the tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. Ita. the. It's the bathroom while this was going on. I mean, I can't imagine that level of focus. If a co-worker even tries to talk to me at the urinal, I can't pee for the rest of the day. But I do understand the frustration here, right? This is probably the only chance the Democrats have to pass so many of their big priorities, and just these two people are standing in the way.. And thoananananananananan. And th. And th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the the thi. the the the their the. their their their their their theanananananananananan their their the. the. I can't their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. Iananananuuoeanuoeanuoeruoeru. teanuoeru. teanu. teuro-au. teuro-auanuanuanuanuanuanuanil. I the. Ithe whole thing. I mean, this is why Joe Manchin has the right idea. If I pissed off as many people as he did, I'd live on a houseboat too. Well, sorry for killing that bill. I'll see you in international water, losers.

Ha ha ha! All right, but let's move on to our next story. Which is about oil. It's earth's lube. And right now, it's loobbing up all the wrong places. Urgent efforts off of Southern California. Crews working to contain a major oil spill, one of the largest there in recent history. At least 12,000 gallons of oil leaking into the Pacific.

The source, believed to be a pipeline, four and a half miles offshore. The area impacted a 13 square mile stretch between Huntington and Newport Beach. People urged to stay away from the beaches. Images coming in late today of oil washing ashore. Officials say they have stopped the flow but warnings tonight of a potential ecological disaster. Okay look guys I'm no scientist but I feel like the last thing a state that's currently on fire needs is a wave of oil washing towards it. I mean pray those wildfires don't the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi people people people the the thi, people people people people thi, people people people people people th- th- thi, people people people people people people people th-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n the the the the the the the the the the the their people their people their people their their th. People th. People th. People th. People thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thir thir thir thir thir tho-c-c-c-n' thir tho-n' tho-n-n' tho-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n' thir the last thing a state that's currently on fire needs is a wave of oil washing towards it. I mean, pray those wildfires don't reach the ocean, or the whole state is going to be fried worse than dog the bounty hunter.

Like, why can't California's disasters cancel each other out for once? You know, just one time? Like, why can't there be a major flood that puts out the wildfires, or an earthquake that swallows up the hype house. And I feel terrible for those birds covered in black oil. You know, not only is their health in danger, but they're also in danger of getting canceled on Twitter. I will say, though, the good news is, with the price of gas ta. They're probably going to get a lot of volunteers to clean this mess up. Yeah, people people are their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thioll, thoom. I's, thi. thiol-s, thoom?. And, thoom?. And, thoome, thoom. And, thoom. And, tho, tho, thi. And, tho, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, t t toge. And, toge. And, toge. And, t toge. And, thae. And, people are going to be ringing seagulls over their gas tanks like, Come on, I just need enough to get to work! Come on!

And you know what's especially awful about this? Is that animals only see the downside of oil. In fact, that's the reason I think that every animal that gets covered in an oil spill, they should get a free Dodge Durango. It's comfy, right? Yeah, now you see why we keep doing this. All right, and finally, let's get into the video that everyone is talking about on TikTok. You know, the app where people watch 10-second videos for 15 hours straight. Right now, one of those videos is the subject of the most intense forensic investigation

since the Kennedy assassination. I am officially hooked on the saga of Couch Guy, and I'm not alone. The original video has been viewed 50 million times alone. This is it. It shows a young woman named Lauren, surprising her boyfriend at college. His name is Robbie. That's him in the red on the couch. The video is dividing the internet. Many people saying he is not happy enough

to see her. One comment saying red flag he did not get up and jump out of the window in excitement. Another saying he looked like he hugged her like she was his aunt at Christmas dinner. But Tick-tuckers are digging deeper into the mystery here, saying that when Robbie bends over, okay, you can see it in slow motion here, the girl sitting next to him on the couch, sneakily passes his cell phone underneath his arm. It's like... All right, there's his arm goes to the side of his pants. Yeah, okay.

Why did she have the phone in the first place? Why did they have to hide that she had it, that's shady, other Tick-Tockers analyzing the girl on the couch's movements when Lauren walks in, okay? They're saying it's weird that she felt like she needed to scoot away, not once from Robbie, but two times. As of this morning though, Lauren is still defending him on her TikTok, so... Wow, this is so intense. And look, I know everyone's having fun with this story, but you've got to feel for this couple. You know, because normally the people who come under this level of scrutiny, they're mega celebrities. You know, people acting like their branchelino or Kim and Kanye, but they're just a normal couple that's going to break up. But if we are going to get into this, this might not be a popular opinion, but I am citing with couch guy here. Yep, I said it.

Yes, maybe he could have been more excited, but in his defense, you have to remember, these are COVID times and she just got off a plane. So even if he's really happy to see her, he's probably thinking, is it okay to hug her? Was she tested? Is she going to give COVID to my side check. I mean for real guys, what we need to remember here is how jarring it is to see somebody out of context. Doesn't matter who it is.

It's gonna throw you off. Like if my mom showed up right here right now, I wouldn't be like, mom! I'll probably be like, whoa, what? What? What are you doing? Am I in trouble? What the stove on again? So I don't think his delayed reaction is damning evidence here. What is damning evidence is that he's sitting next to a guitar.

Yeah, because I'm sorry people. But if you're in college and you're sitting next to a girl and you've got a guitar next to you, you're definitely trying to smash. I mean, that's a rule, isn't it? That's the law. Mr. Law, why else do people buy guitars? Not to play them. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television.

Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at, that's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News, listen to 60 Minutes a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17th. Every day more and more companies are announcing a vaccine mandate for their employees. And if you work at one of those companies and you don't want to comply, there are a couple of options for you.

You can find a new job, you can hide in the office bathroom until 2027, or you can follow the hot new trend, claiming a religious exemption. A growing number of people are claiming religious reasons to dodge COVID vaccine mandates. In Washington, thousands of state workers are doing it. 419-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-19-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-19-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1c if their their their thozy-a-c if thozy. thoea-c if thozymea-a-c if thozymea-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-.A Washington thousands of state workers are doing it. 419 DC fire and EMS employees are asking for a religious exemption. That's about one out of five of the department's employees. One of the largest districts in the country, Montgomery County. Their public school is now facing a lawsuit for not having a religious exemption. This morning at least seven United Airlines employees filing lawsuits against the airline over its vaccine policy saying their

religious exemptions were denied. The NBA denied the request of Golden State Warrior Andrew Wiggins to be exempt from vaccine requirements. The 26-year-old based the request on a religious exemption. As a COVID-19 vaccine mandate deadline for City of Los Angeles employees looms, 2,600 LAPD officers said they will seek religious exemptions to refuse the vaccine. That's right. 2600 LA police officers are trying to get a religious exemption to avoid getting the shot. And black people heard this and they were like, hey, can we get an exemption too?

We also have a deep belief in not getting shot. But this is where we are right now. Countless people across America who have already been vaccinated, by the way, for a million other diseases are now professing a very, let's say, convenient religious belief against taking the COVID vaccine. And you might be seeing this and thinking, damn, religious exemptions seem like a really bad idea and maybe, maybe it's turned into that now, but it wasn't always this way. In fact, we'll look at how a good idea went so wrong in our brand new segment, red, white, and broken.

For most of human history, religious freedom was not a thing. Most governments had a state religion and if you didn't believe in the world. For most of human history, religious freedom was not a thing. Most governments had a state religion, and if you didn't believe in it, you either prayed very quietly, or you burned at the stake very loudly. But America's founders didn't want a country torn apart by religious conflict, so when they wrote the Constitution, they guaranteed freedom of religion in the First Amendment. That's why they put it at the top of the Constitution, because of how important they thought it was,

and also because they knew nobody reads past page 2. Now, this was an incredibly progressive idea at the time. And today we think of it as one of the greatest ideas from that era. I mean, it's certainly much better than the idea that you shouldn't leave the house without seven layers of clothing. It's summer! At least take off the wig, you freak! So, part of that religious freedom meant that the government can't force you to do things that your religion forbids you from doing. For instance, if you're a devout Quaker, you don't have to fight in a war. If you're an Amish, you don't you don't you don't their you don't their their their their their their their, you're their, you're their, you're a religious, you're a religious, you're a religious, you're a religious, you're a religious, you're a religious, you're a religious, you don't, you're a religious, you don't, tolde, tolde, to have, to have, to have, to, to, to, to, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theckeckecklea, tho, thr. thr. thr. thr. threaten, thr. ta, ta,a, ta,a,a,a,a, ta,a,a, ta, threatea, thr.ea're Amish, you don't have to send your kids to high school. If you're a latter-day saint, you don't have to come into work until later in the day. Well, that's not what it is? Yeah, but Steve told me that that's why he comes in at 3.30... God damn it's Steve! But when vaccines became widespread, it turned out some religious Some religious people had objections to those too. And that's when things started to get messy.

Not even really till the 20th century, that we start to see people using religion as a basis for opposing a vaccine. And it doesn't really pick up steam until the 1950s and 60s. It all takes root in the 1964 Civil Rights Act. The law essentially requires employers to make reasonable accommodations for employees who can't fulfill a job requirement due to religious beliefs. But the law doesn't give a lot of guidance when it comes to defining religion. According to rules laid out by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, a religious

belief does not have to be recognized by an organized religion and it can be new, unusual, or seem illogical or unreasonable to others. In 2012, a U.S. District Court ruled that veganism was a sincerely held religious belief which gave one employee a pass from a flu shot. Yeah, you can laugh. But I can see how veganism could be considered a religion. I mean, think about it. They're super dedicated, they follow strict rules, and they think anyone who doesn't share their beliefs should go to hell.

You know, in fact, now that I think about it, my vegan friends talk way more about being vegan than my Christian friends talk about Jesus. Like I don't even know what church Dave goes to, but I know exactly what Mariah had for lunch. The point is, America got into a situation where it was giving exemptions for religious beliefs while being very open-minded about what a religious belief was. And look, there are good reasons why you don't want the government picking apart every religion like it's a cheating boyfriend on Tick-Tock. You'd rather have the government say veganism is a religion, than have the government say veganism isn't a religion, and also, neither is Islam. Unfortunately though, the flip side of being that tolerant is that people can take advantage

of the system. You know, it's like how when airlines didn't define what an emotional support animal was, at first, you had genuinely traumatized people bringing their pets on the plane. But then before long, I was fighting an alligator for an armrest. Can you tell me again what this animal is helping you with? Because he's giving me anxiety, man. So because the government chose not to nitpick what a religious belief could be, it didn't take long for the idea of religious exemptions to start showing cracks. Because of vaccines, we were able to do to do to do to do to do to do to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to eliminate, to start showing cracks. Because of vaccines, we were able to do something that is hardly ever done,

which is to actually eliminate a disease. We eliminated measles in the United States in the year 2000. And all of a sudden, everything changed. State of emergency that's been declared, as the nation faces one of the worst measles outbreaks in decades. In 2000, about 1% of Oregon kindergartners were not fully vaccinated for philosophical or religious reasons. Last year it jumped to 7% the highest rate in the country. In Vermont, there was a 640% increase in kindergarten children

with religious vaccine exemptions. The fact that we have had so many cases in 2018 is really quite discouraging. This is a completely avoidable situation. Oh man, poor Dr. Fauci, this guy has spent his whole career trying to convince people that dying from disease is bad. COVID, measles. I bet if you went back to the 14th century, there was a Dr. Fauci

begging people not to get the black plague. People, please don't have sex with those rats. This is a very avoidable situation. So thanks to those religious exemptions, measles became the throwback fad that nobody asked for. Which is not fair to everyone else and it's definitely also not fair to measles. I mean think about it. th, m, m, m. Measels, m. Measels, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, th th th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. Me. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the is thease, thease, theasea. People, theasea. People, theasea. People, theasea. People, theease, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, thease, throwback fad that nobody asked for. Which is not fair to everyone else, and it's definitely also not fair to measles. I mean, think about it, measles have been retired all these years, and then suddenly it has to start working again,

and all because kindergartners have philosophical objections to the vaccine. I mean, I'm pretty sure the only philosophy that a kindergartner has is, we should turn on for patrol patrol the think about how crazy it is, that in America, you can send your kids to school with measles, right? But if they bring peanut butter with them, their little ass is getting thrown out in the snow. And it turns out that the same way Sarah Palin was just a trial run for Donald Trump,

the measles, the trives wase, th...... trial run for COVID because now even more people are seeking religious exemptions from vaccines and they're finding a lot of help from their fellow worshippers online. We found websites that help people request exemptions. One urge include words like sacred, holy, worship, blessed and others. Thousands of Facebook users are actually teaching each other how to obtain religious exemptions from the vaccine. These are folks who are swapping tips who are showing each other how to evade filters.

On Instagram, the lead pastor of Destiny Christian Church issues an open invitation to anyone seeking religious exemption. If you feel morally compromised by taking this vaccine. We have a form for you. Numerous churches across the country are offering the same. We found a self-described evangelist offering vaccine exemption letters to anyone who wants one. Curious, our producer emailed her. He's fully vaccinated already, by the way. She offered to write letters not just for him, but three family members once he paypal to her at least $25.

$10 minimum donation for each additional family member after that. This woman says she's a Christian. Our producer is Jewish. No questions asked about religion or medicine or anything. Wow, okay. That's not exactly the interreligious harmony that I've been hoping for. And as shocking as it may seem, I think it's pretty obvious that some religious leaders are going to try to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to keep to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their been hoping for. And as shocking as it may seem, I think it's pretty obvious that some religious leaders are going to try to keep people unvaccinated. I mean, after all, they make money from getting the

letters and then they make a ton of money from doing the funerals. But still, it doesn't take a genius to see how the great idea of religious freedoms has been corrupted. You know the question used to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, thiiiiolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliol-a. Iu. Iu. I'm, trueu.eooe.eoooe.eoo.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e. Iu. I'm just just just juste. I'm going going going. I'm try. You know the question used to be, do you have a sincere religious belief? And now it's do you have a PayPal account? And the reason that people need to work so hard to cheat the system with fake religious beliefs is that basically every actual religion has told its followers to get thine ass vaccinated. Faith organizations have come out to say the benefits of getting the vaccine far outweigh any ethical concerns about its development.

Jewish scholars say the Torah requires it. Muslim leaders endorse it too, leaving legitimate religious excuses to skip the shots, far and few between. Today's sermon or Chotba in Islam is Imam Khrayaasam's fact check for the faithfault. This vaccine is absolutely halal. The COVID-19 vaccines got a holy endorsement on Wednesday. Pope Francis told reporters that humanity has a history of friendship with vaccines and urged everyone to get their shots.

In India, the Dalai Lama getting his first coronavirus vaccine shot. The Tibetan spiritual leader, urging his followers to do the same. the the vaccine the the get their shots. In India, the Dalai Lama getting his first coronavirus vaccine shot, the Tibetan spiritual leader urging his followers to do the same. Have courage to take this injection. Yeah, leaders of Christianity, Judaism, Islam and Buddhism all agree that there's nothing in religion that stops people from getting the vaccine. Now we just need Bionsee to put out a statement and then all religions are covered. But think about how crazy it is, to have all the major religions saying there's no religious objection to the vaccine. These guys don't agree on anything.

Hell, Buddhists believe that the middle seat of an airplane is one of the best. Free yourself from the desire for an aisle seat. The only window that matters is the window in your mind. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom. Excuse me, excuse me, sorry, watch the rope please. Excuse me, can you get out of the f-fixing way? So, that's how religious exemptions became red, white and broken. A fantastic idea that was once the foundation for a society where people could pray the way they wish to pray has now warped into an excuse that people can use just to avoid the

rules. I mean, the one upside is now I get to steal people's cars, I get to eat fish on a plane, cut in line everywhere I go and even punch toddlers in the street. and if people say, hey, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, hey, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, hey, Trevor, Trevor, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, tho, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. And, the, the, cut in line everywhere I go, and even punch toddlers in the street. And if people say, hey Trevor, stop being an asshole, I can say, yo, yo, yo, I'm not being an asshole. These are just my religious beliefs. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access access access access access access access access access access access access access access access access the to access to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to eat to to eat to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. I. I. I. I. I. I to their. I their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thea. the. thea. Ia. Ia.levision. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.

But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17. The public library, the best place to find a faded poster of LL Cool J. As much as people love libraries, nobody likes those late fees that pile up if you forget to return a book. Because it's weird, right? Like, librarians are the nicest, gentlest people in the world, and then they just spring on you.

It's like, enjoy the cat in the hat, sweetie, and have it back by Tuesday, or I will fucking drown you in debt. Well, now, some libraries are throwing in the towel. The nation's largest public library system says it's dropping all late fees for overdue books and other borrowed materials forever. In addition, library cardholders have had their accounts wipe clean of any earlier fines. The idea is to encourage more people to use library resources. A spokesperson said that for people who can afford them, fines do little to encourage returning books on time, but for people who are struggling financially, those fines become a barrier

to using libraries. 300 library systems across the country have already cancelled fees, and while they typically generate three to four million dollars a year here in New York, library officials say they can make up the difference from other revenue sources. Wow! No more late fees, that's actually really exciting. I've never been to a bookless library before. No, but this actually is great news, right? Instead of late fees just piling up forever,

they'll just charge you the price of the book if you never return it. Which makes the whole library experience so much more relaxed, you know? Like I love libraries, but there's so many rules. No talking, smoking, no cockfighting rings. Loosen up, people. Although, I will th I I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will I will be I will be I will be I will be I will be I will be I will be I will be honest I will be honest I will be honest I will be honest I will be honest I will be honest I will be honest I people. Although, I will be honest, I'm kind of going to miss late fees. You know, it was the only thing forcing me to actually finish my library books.

Like, if I didn't have that nickel a week hanging over me, I never would have found out why that catapult was so hungry. I actually never found out. I just, yeah, I just, yeah, I never did. said, libraries don't need late fees. They can find other sources of revenue. You know, like, I don't know, a vending machine that only sells food you eat quietly. Or renting out hollow books for assassins to keep their guns in. Hell, they could start renting out libraries on Airbnb. I think it's a perfect idea.

It's quiet. There's furniture. You can have sex in it. There's a 75-year-old woman who lives there who you, who you, who you, who their, who their, who their, who their, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th.. And, th. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. thi. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi in it, there's a 75-year-old woman who lives there who you can talk to but don't have to talk to. It's just like an Airbnb. Moving on. These days we talk a lot about systemic racism and how subtle discrimination is baked into all levels of society, but it's important to remember that America is not all like that. There's also very obvious one-on-one racism. So imagine moving your family to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toke. toke. the to. the the the tthat. There's also very obvious one-on-one racism. So imagine moving your family into your dream home to start a new life, only to find yourself subjected to non-stop harassment from your new neighbor.

That's what a black family in Virginia Beach has been living with. They describe an escalating campaign of racial slurs, loud music, and monkey noises. Whenever we would step out of our house the monkey noises would start so racist and it's disgusting like I don't even know how it was to explain it. The minute I would step the to the try to the minute I opened my front door his lights blank or my mozy the mozy the th explain it. The minute I opened my front door, his lights blank, or my music, or my song comes on. Local police say, while the behavior is appalling,

it is not criminally actionable. Are you shitting me? I can't even believe that this is a real story in real life. And honestly, I actually find this kind of racism so baffling because this guy may be playing loud music and noises to harass his neighbors, but he's the one closest to the music and the loud noises. Like, is your racism really worth it if you can't even have a conversation in your own house? Hey, honey, I'm really ruining life for that black family! What? No, I'm not coming back from anything.

No, the black family. I'm going deaf. I love you too. And I'm sorry, man, but the police claiming that they can't do anything? That's such bullshit. Why don't they use one of those vague laws that they charge black people with all the time, like disturbing the peace? Or, your house has a broken tha has a broken tha broken thaaa broken tha, tha, tha, their their tha, their tha, tha, their thus, I their thus, I thus, I's their thus, I'm thus, I'm th. thoom-a, I's their, I'm not, I'm not, I'm their, I'm their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their..... their their their their their their their their their their their thi. thi. their thi. thi. the. the. theateateat tho tho tho tho thean. the thean. tho the the the thooo the a broken tail light sir but yeah I guess some people are just assholes and

without the police on their side the Martinez family doesn't have a lot of options to stop the music and the monkey noises from playing although one thing they could do is release some actual monkeys into the neighborhood yeah because think about it being racist is fun until a monkey he has mating sounds. Next thing you know, your racist ass is getting pounded by a monkey. Oh, because you didn't want black neighbors. And finally, to the big celebrity news that everyone is talking about.

No, not Brittany finally being able to watch PG-13 movies. I'm talking about the radical interior decorating of pop star, Megan Traynor. When you're married, it can often feel like you do everything together with your significant other, you know, watching shows, going shopping, you name it. But one celebrity, well, let's just say, this couple is taking it to the next level when it comes to togetherness. Singer Megan Traynor had two toilets installed next to each other in her bathroom so that she and her husband can go to the bathroom at the same time. We've only pooped together twice. We pee at the same time a lot. White people. This really shows you how different relationships can be

right? Like you have some people who are like I never fart in front of my spouse and then you have other couples going honey I just booked a couple's dump for later tonight, and I hope to see you there. And get that, they've pooped together not once, but twice. I mean, twice says a lot. Twice says you did it once. And then looked at each other like, we should do that again. And they think this brings them closer as a couple, but I also think th think it it it it it think it think it thinks thinks thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi husband never gets constipated, she's going to think he's having an affair. All I'm saying is I would

never do this, like I only poop the normal way, right, next to a stranger with a one-inch wall between us. How God intended. The NBA players are used to taking charges. the NBA players are today. the toye toys from other players. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th th th thi, th th th th th th. I I I I th. I th. I th. I thi, thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. thi. I thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I thi. I, NBA players are used to taking charges, but usually from other players. This time, it's from the FBI. Breaking news, 18 former NBA players are charged with trying to defraud the league's health and welfare benefit plan out of nearly $4 million. Ex-Nets player, Terence Williams, ex-Nix player, Shannon Brown, X Nix player Shannon Brown, Ronald Glenn Davis, and 15 other former players were indicted for conspiracy to commit health

fraud and wire fraud. They're accused of submitting claims from medical and dental services they were never done. The ex-players got about $2.5 million. Okay, look, look, I know a lot of people are shocked by this, but guys, why are we surprised? Pretending to be hurt is a huge part of playing in the NBA. Which, by the way, I'm awful. I think men shouldn't be afraid to express when they're hurt. And once you retire, you've got to make money somehow. I mean, what's more dishonest? Stealing money from the health fund? Or Shaq claiming that Papa Johns is good pizza? This is all fraud.

We're all friends here. But hey, getting court is bad news for these players. And it's gonna be great news for whatever jail is about to get the best prison basketball team of all time. Can you imagine having these guys play? Hell no! I'm not guarding big baby Davis! That guy's huge! I might be a murder, but I'm not crazy. But let's move on to a story about the mafia. You know, the guys who know a guy if you need a guy for that. The mob has been in an American institution since

the 19th century. But now, it's in the hands of millennials. And it turns out that just like mailing a letter or dressing up for work, they're their their their they're their their their their their. They're their. They're their. They're their. They're their. They're th. They're th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. And, thi. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, thean. And, thin. And, thean. And, thean. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And the. And it turns out that just like mailing a letter or dressing up for work, they're not very good at it. Organized crime in New York is less organized than it used to be. Mob investigators say many of the clans are being fundamentally mismanaged nowadays. There's a common thought among the old guard of mobsters that the millennial generation hasn't properly learned the ropes. Also something that the old guard says is that the younger mobsters are always texting, which makes it so much easier for them to get caught. Okay, fair criticism.

You know, I understand the texting makes it way easier to get court doing crimes, but here's my question. As a millennial, I would like to know. What else are we supposed to do? Talk on the phone? Yo. tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thiolk, thi, thi, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thi, thi, thiolk, thi, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. would like to know. What else are we supposed to do? Talk on the phone? Yo, I'll take life in prison over that shit any day. If you ask me the real problem here with the mobsters texting is not getting caught, it's getting your point across. Because threatening to beat someone to death

isn't as terrifying when it workplace is dealing with this kind of boomer versus millennial culture clash. You know, I bet even in the vampire community, you have older vampires mad at the younger ones. Lazarus, I've told you a thousand times, do not write blood on your van mows. And finally, data breaches. They're part of everyday life, from credit card companies, to government agencies, to Steve. I told you my pin in confidence, Steve. But today, it's video gamers who are getting owned. The popular game streaming platform, Twitch, is the latest online victim of a hack attack.

Several tech media outlets say, the company, which is owned by Amazon, confirmed an anonymous individual posted a 1, 125 gigabyte file containing Twitch's data. The reports say the platform source code was leaked along with how much top streamers on the service get paid so far no user data was leaked Twitch says it's working on the problem. That's right tons of data on the video gaming site Twitch was hacked. Although when you see what was actually leaked,

I think this could have been way worse. Let's all be grateful that we didn't see any of Bowser's dick picks. I'm curious now, though. Do you think the carpet matches the shell? But there was some eye-opening stuff in that leak. We learned just how much some of these Twitch gamers make, up to $9 million. Yeah, and that's going to add insult to injury, knowing that the guy who tea-bagged you last night and Caller Duty was doing it from a private jet.

Oh, and in case you're wondering who the highest earning gamers are, topping the list was a gaming group critical role. And at the bottom of the list once again was Chuck Schumer playing snake on an old Nokia. Before we go, this week is Mental Illness Awareness Week. So please consider supporting the A-CoMA project. The A-Coma project offers free virtual therapy and workshops for teens and young adults of color as well as educating youth and their families on the importance of mental health. So if you want to support them in this work, please donate at the link below. Watch the Daily Show, weeknights at 11th Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes

anytime on Paramount Plus. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts.

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