The Daily Show: Ears Edition - This Week's Top Stories - The GOP's Impeachment Dodge & Wall Street Halts the GameStop Rally

Episode Date: January 30, 2021

Republicans rely on tortured logic to resist Donald Trump's impeachment, trading firms take heat for restricting trades on GameStop, and the GOP balks at President Biden's call for unity. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17th. It is so exciting that we can finally stop spending all our time talking about Donald

Trump's presidency. Yes, instead, we get to talk about cleaning up the mess from Donald Trump's presidency. It's history in the making once again as Capitol Hill prepares for the second Donald Trump impeachment trial. Once again, the House impeachment managers will take the long walk across the United States Capitol to deliver the one article of impeachment to the United States Senate. The Senate will conduct a trial of the impeachment of Donald Trump. It will be a full trial. It will be a fair trial, but make no

mistake, there will be a trial and when that trial ends, senators will have to decide if they believe Donald John, Donald, to to to to the to the to the to the to the tri. thea, the a the a trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial, trial trial trial trial trial trial trial trial trial trial, trial, the the the the the the the the the tri- tri- tri-in, trial, trie, trie, t, t, the a t, the a the a the a the a trial, and when that trial ends, senators will have to decide if they believe Donald John Trump incited the erection, insurrection against the United States. God damn! I knew the Democrats were horny for Trump's impeachment, but that was ridiculous. And you could tell by the look on his face that Schumer knew that he had blown the entire case. He incited this erection. Oh, damn it, I guess he gets to be president again.

I'm sorry, everybody. Now, Trump's team doesn't even have to present a defense. They'll just be like, yo, right guys, let's get out of here. And honestly, I can't blame them. I mean, come on, Schumer. How hard is it to not say the word erection? You can't afford to be making these kinds of rookie mistakes. You've just defeated Donald Trump in a national erection,

ah, damn it. Now, the last time Donald Trump got impeached, most Republican senators said they wouldn't convict him because he hadn't done anything wrong. But after the capital attack, they had to admit that, yes, maybe Trump actually did incite an insurrection. But they still don't want to impeach him because that will make his followers angry. And have you seen his followers? I mean, they staged an insurrection. Which is why th, th, thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. But, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, I mean, they staged an insurrection. Which is why, for this impeachment trial,

Republican senators have found a loophole to let them dodge the issue entirely. A chorus of criticism this morning from Republican senators ahead of former President Trump's impeachment trial. Some, arguing that since Donald Trump is out of office, it's out of their hands. I think the trial is stupid. I think it's counterproductive. We already have a flaming fire in this country, and it's like taking a bunch of gasoline

and pouring it on top of the fire. A trial after the president has left office is beyond the Senate's constitutional authority. I think a lot of Americans are going to trying to convict and remove from office, a man who left office a week ago. If you can impeach a president after they're out of office, why don't we impeach George Washington? He owns slaves. Where does this stop? Okay, first of all, I support impeaching George Washington, because I don't want that guy holding office again. A slave-owning zombie as president? That's terrifying! But let's be real, man. This is one of the most ridiculous arguments ever. Trump committed crimes on his way out of the door.

So what? The people just have to let it go? That policy doesn't exist anywhere else. If you get fired at Best Buy, they don't just let you steal a TV on the way out. They don't even let you take take that that that that that th you thuu the blue the blue the blue the blue the blue tak tak tak tak their tak tak their that blue shirt with you. You walk out of there naked. In fact, you can argue that you have to convict Trump, because if there's no consequence for trying to overthrow the government, then every president will just try it on their way out of office. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? Sack the Capitol, boys! Oh, it didn't work? Well, I shot my shot. See you guys in four years, everybody. Now, saying you can't impeach Trump because then you'd have to impeach George Washington is one thing.

But one of Trump's top supporters had an even wilder argument. You can't impeach Trump because then you'd have to impeach everybody. House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy is facing backlash for new comments that he made in the wake of the deadly Capitol riot. I thought the president had some responsibility when it came to the response to to to the response to the response to the response to the response to the response to the response to the response the response to the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the thi the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. the the the the the is the is the is the is the is thee is theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. the. the. the. the. the is the in the wake of the deadly capital riot. I thought the president had some responsibility when it came to the response. If you listen to what president said at the rally, he said, demonstrate peacefully. I also think everybody across this country has some responsibility. Think about four years ago after the president Trump was sworn in.

What happened the very next day? The title was resist with people walking in the streets. Everyone across the country's responsible? Everyone across... Whoa, whoa, my man. Don't bring me into this. I wasn't even near Washington. I was busy at home seeing if you could make waffles out of chocolate bars. And then I was busy calling the fire department because the answer is no.

But this is unbelievable. The GOP is supposed to be the party of personal responsibility. Isn't that their thing? But as soon as their members do something wrong, they start talking like Buddhists. When you think of the oneness of all things, then Donald Trump is as guilty as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as the blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a blooming as a or the flowing river. If we convict Trump, we must convict nature herself.

Oh. Now you might be asking, why is it so hard to find Republicans willing to hold Donald Trump responsible for his actions? Well, because it turns out that even out of office, Trump still has an incredible amount of power with Republican voters. And he's petty enough to use it against anybody who dares cross him. Washington Post reports, Trump has entertained the idea of creating a third party called the Patriot Party and instructed his aides to prepare election challenges to lawmakers

who crossed him in the final weeks in office, including Wyoming Republican representative, Liz Cheney, Georgia Governor Brian Kemp, Alaska Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski, and South Carolina Republican representative Tom Rice, according to people familiar with the plans. He's still wanting to exert whatever pressure he can over the Republican senators who still, they don't control the fate of his presidency, that's now over, but they do control whether Donald Trump goes down in history as the first president or

former president ever to be convicted in an impeachment trial so I think Trump is looking for any kind of power that he can still exert over Republicans that's right people Trump is threatening to form a new political party as a way to punish Republicans who betray him and you know he's serious because he made Jared Kushner Google how to start political party. This shit is on. And by the way, it seems unfair to get to pick a name for your party like Patriot Party. Because you got to wait until everyone else pick boring words and then you just jump in like, oh you guys are Democrats and Republicans.

Cool, we'll be the explosive orgasm party. And I'll be honest I don't th th th th th th th th th th th th thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thi thu thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. This th th. This th. This th th th. thi. This thi. This thi. th. This th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat the thi thi thi thi thi Cool, we'll be the explosive orgasm party. And I'll be honest, I don't actually get Donald Trump. He just left his job and he's already out here trying to form new parties and threaten senators. I thought if there's anyone who would enjoy retirement, it's Donald Trump. I mean, he's basically already been retired for the last four years. My man, take some time off. Enjoy Florida. Play some golf. Spend some time with your, you know what,

actually, I get it now. The game stop stock explosion. You know, it's the reason your 14-year-old cousin just bought a Ferrari. Traders on Reddit sent the stock soaring this week, causing billions in losses for the hedge funds that bet against the video game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game game to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the.. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the stock soaring this week, causing billions in losses for the hedge funds that bet against the video game retailer's stock. And today, Wall Street decided, enough was enough. And this is a Fox News alert now. Draw your attention to Main Street,

where GameStop and AMC shares have been tumbling in trading action today as a growing number of firms, move to halt trading on some stocks boosted against against against against against against against to to to to to to to to b to to to to to to to to to taxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.................. the the the the the the the the the t. teee. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. as a growing number of firms moved to halt trading on some stocks boosted by amateur traders on Reddit. The action is so wild that TD AmeritTrade and Robin Hood have restricted trading of these stocks. Wells Fargo also banning its advisors from telling clients to buy or sell GameStop and AMC. And now the criticism centered on Robin Hood for abandoning their followers here in favor of helping those th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thoed th thoed thoed thoed thoed thoed to to to thoed to to to to to to to to to to to halting to to halt. I to halting to to halting to halting to to to to halt. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, t..... I, t. I, the. I, the their, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea, thea, t criticism centered on Robin Hood for abandoning their followers here

in favor of helping those who had shorted all these thoughts in the first place. I don't particularly like the move on Robin Hood today. I'm talking to people this morning that say, okay, that is anti-capitalism. You can't do that. A class action complaint was just filed in the southern southern southern southern southern southern southern southern southern southern southern southern the southern the southern the southern. District of New York against Robin Hood. And this is what part of it says, and I'm quoting, purposefully, willfully and knowingly, Robin Hood removed the stock GME GameStop from its

trading platform in the midst of an unprecedented stock rise. Thereby it goes on manipulating the open market. Yeah, that's right people. Wall Street was getting rocked so hard by average people buying stock in GameStop that they just stopped average people from buying it. Yeah, the same guys, the same guys who are always like, the markets must never be regulated. They must always remain free. Those same guys are now like, oh shit, the poor people got a hold of the freedom. Turn it off, turn off the freedom! So thanks to this ban, the GameStop stock that a lot of people bought for a ton of money is now worth a lot less, which is probably familiar to anyone who sold a used game back to GameStop.

So right now, a lot of people are understandably upset about what Wall Street is doing. In fact, it's bringing together people from all sides. I mean, AOC and Ted Cruz are as far apart as Madison and Austin, and even they're both blasting the Robin Hood app for blocking users from buying GameStop stocks. Everyone's mad. Even people like Jaroo. Jaroo, who tweeted, Yo, this is a fucking crime.

What a Robin Hood is doing. Do not sell. And let me tell you something. When the guy who did the fire festival thinks that you're a fraud, man, and you're doing some shady shit. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television.

Very few have been given access to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thelevision. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17. Joseph Rafiki Biden. There's no doubt that he's got a tough job ahead of him, but in his inauguration speech last week, Biden made clear what his top priority is. To overcome these challenges, to restore the soul and secure the future of America, requires so much more than words.

It requires the most elusive of all things in a democracy. Unity. Unity. Unity. Unity. Unity. Unity.

Unity. Unity. Unity. Unity. But look, I get it. Unity? Unity? Unity. But look, I get it. America has been divided over the last four years. Technically 12 if you include Obama's years.

Actually, it was pretty divided under Bush. And Clinton. Whoofe, yeah, that was bad. Oh, you also had the 60s and the Civil War. I mean, the civil war. Oh, man. You know it also wasn't great. The pilgrims and the Indians, and the Civil War. I mean, the Civil War. Oh, man, you know what, also wasn't great? The whole thing with the pilgrims and the Indians, either. All right, so America's been divided for like 2,000 years now.

The point is unity. So, I can see why unity would be very appealing for people right now. But for unity to work, you have to agree on what unity is. And in Washington right now, they're not even united on that. U.S. Senator John Corner from Texas, his response to the inclusion of transgender people in the military was to tweet another unifying move by the new administration, question mark. Democrats claim to want to unify the country, but impeaching a former president a private citizen is the antithesis of unity. Joe Biden, you talk about unifying the country.

Pursuing impeachment after he leaves the office, will further divide the country. It's hard to unify when you're impeaching a president who's already left office. Joe Biden vowed that his top priority was, quote, unity. Does anyone at this point still believe him? Anybody? Raise your hand at home? Raise your hand at home? Dude, only one of your viewers is dumb enough

to think that you can see him through the TV. Because this is ridiculous, right? Apparently, Republicans think that unity means the Democrats have to act like Republicans. That's is th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thi, thi, thi, thi, any anybody anybody anybody, any anybody, any anybody, any anybody, any any any any thi, any any any any thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the theeean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean the the the think that unity means the Democrats have to act like Republicans? That's not what unity is. Unity does not mean agreement. It doesn't mean doing whatever the other side wants. Unity means the state of being united. And united means unified.

And unified means to be in for the same thing. And thing, same thing means. I'll tell you this much. Unity doesn't mean you just do what the losers want. All right? It definitely doesn't mean that you can't hold Trump accountable for what he did. That wouldn't fly in court. You are accused of manslaughter. How do you plead? I plead unity, your honor.

Man, get your ass to jail. And it's one thing to try to find unity with people who disagree with you on policies. But how do you find unity with people who don't even recognize your legitimacy? A clear majority of House Republicans, who are now kind of braying about unity, voted to overturn the election and in effect make Trump president for four more years over the will of the voters. This election was not stolen. Do you accept that fact?

Well, what I would say is that the debate over whether or not there was fraud should occur. We never had any presentation in court where we actually looked at the evidence. Republican Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Green, a Q&on supporter, she has repeatedly indicated support for executing prominent Democratic politicians. 2019 she liked to comment that said quote a bullet to the head would be quicker to remove House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. In 2018 she said quote the stage is being set after someone asked whether they could hang President Obama and Hillary Clinton. Holy shit!

This Marjorie Taylor Greenlady wanted to shoot Pelosi and hang Obama and Hillary? This woman is something else. It's like a normal Karen fell into a vet of chemicals and then became a Batman villain. I mean, how can you achieve unity with someone who's literally wanting you dead? There's a reason why planet Earth never ends with a bill being signed. And suddenly the cheater lunges at the young gazelle, eager to reach a bipartisan agreement. Seriously people, forget the country for a minute, right? That's their co-worker.

Imagine going into work every day, knowing one of your co-workers wants to kill you. A co-worker stole my yogurt one time, and I still hold it against him. I was hungry for 20 minutes that day, Kevin. You're a monster! Look, considering where the Republican Party is right now, I don't know if the two sides can really come together,

but it would be fun watching them try to talk their issues out. Today, we're here to work on unity. Now, this is a safe space to share your feelings and hopefully find some common ground. Democrats, let's start with you. We want unity. You know, it's about coming together and you're respecting each other. Wrong. Wrong.

Ah, Republicans, you had a very strong reaction to that. What does unity mean to you? Unity is bringing everyone in the country together to do exactly what we want all the time. And if you have a problem with that, we'll storm your office. That's what Unity is. Mmm, very good sharing. I love how honest you're being. Yep. Democrats, is that something you think you might be open to? No. He just said he wants to storm my office. Or put you in prison. What? Ah, options? Very good. You know what, I feel we should have a bigger say. We won the election. You stole the election.

Now, remember, compromise, okay? So how about Democrats won the election by stealing it? Yeah, that's fair. No, it's not. Look, we just went the Republicans to come to the table in good faith and find areas we can agree on so we can pass meaningful laws. Okay, let's explore this. Republicans, when Democrats just said that, what is it that you hear?

Uh, I heard that they want mandatory Sharia socialism and to put Rupal on the $50 bill. That's what she said. That's not what I said at all. Although I am open to the Rupal thing, kind of jives up the money, but listen, if they really wanted Unity, how do they explain the capital riots? That could have been a real moment for Unity,

but there wasn't a single Democrat in that mob, because they're all talked with the See, see, this is what he does. It's always my fault. Well, it is always your fault. It's your fault every single time. You're always making it your fault. Okay, you're walking around like it's not my fault. It's not my fault. You can stop.

You can stop. You can stop. Especially the Democrats. Look, we're almost out of time so what I'd like to do is just take a step back and look at all the progress we've made. Excuse me? Progress? There has been no progress. See you finally agreed on something? You're both united behind the fact that you can never unite. Unity achieved! Republicans, you're cured Democrats. Let's pick this up again next week. We have a lot to work through. Cool because because I got around, I'm parked in a handicapped spot, so thanks. Of course you did. Of course he did.

Of course he did. President Joseph Rolex Biden. He has been in office for less than a week. But man, he's already putting his stamp on the presidency with a series of eye-catching progressive moves. President Biden has ended a band on transgender people in the military. Mr. Biden signed an executive order yesterday reversing a policy ordered by then President Trump. President Joe Biden plans on making the switch to electric vehicles replacing the government's current vehicle fleet. The White House has added a sign language interpreter to its news briefings.

Press Secretary Gen Socki says an American sign language interpreter will be a regular part of daily press briefings during the Biden administration. The Treasury Department will resume its efforts to put former slave and abolitionist Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill. The plan to replace Andrew Jackson on the 20 was originally announced during the Obama administration, but President Trump delayed that project. Damn, Joe Biden coming in.

Hot! He's walking into the White House like it's the first day of prison. Yo, who's the wokest motherfa in here? Because I'm about to whip his, her, or their ass. I mean, look at those executive orders. Trans rights, electric cars, sign language, and putting Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill is back, baby. Which makes sense.

She went underground for a while, but then she came back once it was safe. You know how she'd do. Although, this might be too little too late, because no one uses cash anymore. It would be safer to incorporate her into the Venmo logo. But still, replacing one of the most the most the most the most the most the most most most the most the most most most most most the most most most the most the most the most most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most thauauauiceauiceauicicicethueauiau, tubeck. tubeck. tubeck. tubeck. tubeck. tubeck. tube, tube, tube, tube, tube, tube, tube. tube. tube. t. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. t. t. t. teau. teau. teau. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. tooeau. te. would be safer to incorporate her into the Venmo logo. But still, replacing one of the most racist presidents with a black woman who helped slaves escape is amazing progress. I mean if you went back in time and told Andrew Jackson that Joe Biden was doing this he would be like, wait Joe Biden, that guy who just got elected to the Senate? And let's be honest, the sign language interpreter is way overdue. I mean, of course tru-tru, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to to to to to told told told told told told told too, too, toe, toe, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thr-a, thr-a'' thr-mc-mc-mc-a''a'a'a'a'n'n'a'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n' got elected to the Senate? And let's be honest, the sign language interpreter is way overdue.

I mean, of course, Trump already had a sign language interpreter for some of his briefings, but this is much better. And I'm happy about the electric car thing. But I will say, part of me thinks that it's just so that the government has quieter cars to sneak up on us. You know, because now you'll never know when they the they they they they they they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll their they'll they'll their their their their their thinks that it's just so that the government has quieter cars to sneak up on us. You know, because now you'll never know when they're dry. Before we go, I wanted to remind you that the coronavirus is as bad as it has ever been, and our first responders are out there fighting to save people's lives. Now if you can help these first responders out in any way, then please consider a donation to first responders first responders first, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, you can help these first responders out in any way,

then please consider a donation to first responders first, which offers first class medical and psychological treatment for the first responders themselves. Find out more at the link below. The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and the comedy central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show.com.

Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, and subscribe to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content and more. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at.

That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 minutesutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast.