The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Trump Attacks CNN's Kaitlan Collins Over Epstein Q & Renovates D.C. in His Image | Ms. Pat

Episode Date: February 5, 2026

Michael Kosta dives into Trump’s recent moves to steer the country back on track, which include the release of lame new “America Is Back” hats, telling CNN’s Kaitlan Collins to get over the Epstein files and smile more, and continuing his D.C. makeover by building a massive arch across from the Lincoln Memorial. Plus, Grace Kuhlenschmidt shares further updates on the president’s construction rampage. The state that brought you President Ronald Reagan and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger offers a thrilling new contender for the White House: Governor Gavin Newsom. From enduring humble nepo baby beginnings in San Francisco, to opening a winery backed by an oil tycoon, to casting himself as an all-caps-posting foil to President Trump, Newsom is ready to make his national debut as a 2028 presidential candidate. This is the Daily Showography of Gavin Newsom. Ms. Pat, comedian, actor, and co-creator of the hit BET+ series, "The Ms. Pat Show," sits down with Michael Kosta to discuss the show's fifth season. They talk about fighting through network pulls for the chance to speak out about immigration, portraying a unique-yet-universal mother to viewers, preparing for a doomsday scenario in the current administration, and learning to believe in herself after being shot, abused, and incarcerated. Go to https://quince.com/dailyshow for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by Ninja Lux Cafe, the three-and-one machine that makes espresso, drip coffee, and cold brew. No barista skills required. You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Center. It's America's only sorts for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Michael Costa. Got so much to talk about tonight.

Gavin Newsom is ready for his close-up. Kennedy Center about to get that BBL. And you won't believe this, Trump acted like a dick. So, let's get into the headlines. It's no secret that things have not been great in the old US of A lately. Government shock troops are rampaging through the streets. Billionaires are stripping our last remaining news outlets for parts. And I just bought a pint of raspberries that cost $43.

But don't worry, President Trump has an announcement that's going to turn everything around. America is back. This is a new hat. We just came out. America is back. America is back. Thanks for that inspiring

halftime speech coach. Team, I know we're down 55 to 0, but on the other hand, I made a hat. Hope that helps. Good luck in the second half. It's bad enough they release hats as often as iPhone updates, but it doesn't even look like

Trump's heart is in this one. Can someone ask him a fun question to cheer him up a bit? And please make sure it's not about a subject that he's desperately trying to avoid. A lot of women who are survivors of upsteens are unhappy with those redactions that came out. Some of the entire witness interviews are totally blocked out. Caitlin Collins, Ixnay on the dead edophile pay.

This is supposed to be a fun merch drop. Trying to hold the president to account is really killing the vibe here. Mr. President, why don't you answer the question in the dignified and respectable manner that we've come to expect? You know, she's a young woman. I don't think I've ever seen you smile. I've known you for 10 years. I don't think I've ever seen a smile. Well, I'm asking you about survivors.

You know why you're not smiling? Because you know you're not telling the truth. Damn. That is messed up. Can I talk to the president alone for just a second? Hey, DJ, a few thoughts. All right? I don't know if there's ever a time to tell a reporter to smile,

but I'm almost positive. It's not when she's asking you about sex trafficking. trafficking victims. I mean, even if she did smile, would that make it better? Hey, I'd like to ask you about that pedophile ring. But to be fair to the president, he's really tired of being asked all these questions that he refuses to answer. I think it's really time for the country to get onto something else.

Yeah, yeah, of course, you want to move on to something else. I would, too, if I was in the Epstein files thousands of times. I feel the same way when the IRS tries to audit me. Hey, guys, I appreciate your interest, but me and my business jacuzzi are ready to move on. But you know what? Donald Trump is right about one thing. There are a lot of other important issues to focus on, like what exactly?

The president has announced his intention to build a giant arch across from the Lincoln Memorial. Wee! The president, my arch is going to fly. And now it's fighting Godzilla. And now it's telling Barbie to, smile, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. And now it's marrying the Washington

monument. Oh, yeah. Is that what you guys laugh at? Stuff like that, m'n-c-c-c-c. Okay, so the president has decided to spend his time building a giant arch. How giant are we talking? The Washington Post reports it could stand as high as 250 feet, just 40 feet shorter than the U.S. Capitol.

Two people say he's grown attached to the idea, despite some architectural experts being alarmed by the scale. I'd like it to be the biggest one of them. Wow. Get excited. People. Trump is building Washington, D.C.'s hottest suicide destination. First up, it's never good when the architectural experts use the word alarmed. And secondly, do we need the world's biggest arch? This is how you can tell Trump doesn't live with Melania full time, because this is one of

those ideas men have when they're home alone for too long. Whenever my wife goes away, two days into her trip, I'm like, Actually, you know, we do need a skate park in this living room. And as for the arch design, it's basically just copying the Arc de Triumph. And honestly, if we're going to be derivative of France, let's not just settle for their arches. How about socialize health care? Or even better, the right to start a riot when your boss emails you after 5 p.m. But fine.

But fine. I guess go build your arch. Then we can get back to those important issues that you are so eager for America. to return to, so what do you got? President Trump announcing he will shut down the Kennedy Center for two years for a top-to-bottom renovation. Oh, no, Trump is shutting down the Kennedy Center

for two years? But I promised my wife we'd go see the Bulgarian National Modern Jazz Dance Company. Damn you, Trump. Strange, he's doing this now. Since they already renovated the Kennedy Center the last time he was president, there can't be another reason he wants to shut it down

for two years, right? Right? That planned closures coming after a slew of artists canceled performances once the president purged the Kennedy Center's board, naming himself chairman and putting his own name on the building. Ah, yeah, he decided to close the Kennedy Center,

the same way your friend who collects dolls decided to become celibate. Come on, Trump, you can replace those performers. There's plenty of great conservative artists like Nikki Minaj and Kanye West and I'm sure someone else will also have a mental breakdown soon. Also, hasn't the Kennedy family been through enough? The assassinations, the scandals, spending Thanksgiving with RFK Jr.

Instead of turkey, I spatch cocked a raccoon. But fine, I'll give you the arch, and I'll give you the Kennedy Center. Just please, for the love of God, stop building stuff and focus on your actual job. The president has shared what he calls the first public rendering of the future White House ballroom. The estimated cost of the project to skyrocket from 200 million to now 400 million. Oh, that's right, the ballroom. I mean, I guess it doesn't suck. But for $400 million, it's definitely not blowing me away.

I mean, who designed this thing? Frank Lloyd just all right. Architects your slave! Let's sum up how we got here. The President of the United States is in the Oval Office, insulting professional reporters for asking about his administration's mishandling of the highest profile sex trafficking case in American history. And instead of answering these questions,

he'd rather spend his time on his construction fetish of building his arch, a new Kennedy Center, and a giant ballroom he and his friends can dance in while the rest of the country collapses around them. Or, in other words, America is back. God, that enthusiasm is infectious. For more on the president's president. makeover of Washington, we go to

Grace Koolenshmidt in the nation's capital. Please tell me they are going to be done with all this soon. Absolutely, Michael. After that arch and the Kennedy Center, they're going to be all done. Great. Few. Awesome. Wait till they see what they got planned.

They are going to build a small statue of Trump to sit on the lap of the Lincoln Memorial. Then Trump is going to add a second dome on the Capitol because, you know, Booby. Every name on the Vietnam Memorial Wall is getting Trump added to it. Wait, look. That seems really disrespectful.

Oh, how dare you say that about the thousands of Trumps who have died for this country? Grace, what is the point of all this? Why does he keep building stuff all over D.C.? Well, Trump is very invested in his legacy. He wants to make his mark on the city's territory, so people will always remember that he was there. Mark his territory? You're making him. sound like a dog. Yes, exactly. Donald Trump is just like a dog. Specifically, one of those dogs that got two inbred

and now has all these weird health problems. Like, I didn't even know a dog could get cancels. Okay, so he was going to spend his entire term putting up buildings around D.C., like a dog who pisses all over the neighborhood? No, eventually he will run out of ideas for buildings. Okay, thank God. Yeah. And then he will actually start pissing all over D.C.

Why would he do that? Because he's a good boy. He is President, good boy, and that's his spot, and that's his spot, and that's his spot. Grace, he can't just pee on everything in D.C. He'll run out of pee. No, no.

He's 80 years old. It's like a water bottle in hamster's cage down there. There's always a little bee dripping off the tip. Oh, my God. Grace, that's, that's really, upsetting. The country's falling apart and the president is spending his time lifting his high and leg and spraying a fine mist of pee

all over our beloved capital. I've got to tell you this is making me depressed. Well, you being depressed is making the rest of us depressed. Could you try smiling a bit more? Fair. Hey, Grace Coulin-Schmidt, everyone. We find out more than we wanted

about Gavin Newsom. Don't go away. This show is supported by Odu. When you buy business software from lots of vendors, the costs add up, and it gets complicated and confusing. O-DU solves this. It's a single company that sells a suite of enterprise apps that handles everything from accounting to inventory to sales. O-D-O-D-O-O-O-O-D-O-O-D-O-O-com. That's O-D-O-O-O-O-O-com. You can save money without missing out on features you need. Check out O-D-O-O-O-O-com.

Gavin Newsom is a constant presence in the news these days, whether he's gearing up for a presidential run, beefing with President Trump, or more recently beefing with Hallie Berry. I mean, I'm not usually one to pick sides, but I've got to go with my celebrity hall pass on this one. So, sorry, Hallie Berry. But how did Gavin Newsom become the towering political figure he is today?

We're about to find out in a brand new daily showography. From the state that brought you President Ronald Reagan and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger comes an exciting new politician ready for his close-up. Audiences and critics agree Gavin Newsom is inspiring, savvy and charismatic, and has awesome tweets. He's now playing in select venues but is preparing to be released nationwide. This is the Daily Showography of Gavin Newsom, leading man, for your consideration.

Gavin Christopher Newsom was born in 1967 to a family that was as San Francisco as stepping on a syringe in the tenderloid. Sarah Frank, fifth generation. And thus began Newsom's classic rags to riches story. My father, his closest friends in the world were some of the richest families in the world. Fine, he's a nepo baby,

but so is Dakota Johnson, and we love her. Plus, Newsom can also do the humble beginnings thing. I grew up with a single mom and she came from nothing. She struggled all our life. You see that. He can play rich and poor. That's what I call range. Kristen Bale has nothing on this guy.

After going to college on a baseball scholarship, Gavin followed in the footsteps of so many young graduates by opening a winery. With nothing but his grit, his refined palate and the financial backing of an oil tycoon. Yes, things were finally starting to work out for this tall, handsome athletic, well-connected young man. Owning this small business gave Newsom his first taste of the issues affecting real Americans. Enough enough. We're sick and tired of corky wines, wines that are tainted, wines that are sent back in restaurants.

Move over, Bernie. There's a new man of the people in town. Newsom's wine company was a hit. He had the smell of success with some oaky notes, and I want to say, Jerry. But soon a health coat clash with City Hall led to sour, grapes. So Newsom took his complaint straight to the mayor who had a strange counteroffer. Willie Brown, the mayor, said, I'm going to point you to the parking traffic commission because I was bitching about doing business in San Francisco. Getting appointed to a position he knew nothing about soon gave Gavin the confidence to aim even higher. Willie Brown was turned out as mayor and there was an open seat and I think at 33 I announced why the hell not.

And with that stirring message as his clarion call, Newsom landed his biggest role today. Mayor. He quickly made his mark, taking the lead on gay marriage. Separate! Because he wanted everyone to experience the joy that he felt with his wife, Kimberly Gilfoyle, a California district attorney who definitely has a type. Gavin and Kimberly were practically San Francisco royalty, even if they didn't quite know how to use chairs. But like so many celebrity marriages, it ended in divorce.

Sending Gavin into his bad boy era. He lashed out at the press. That was a great cheap truck. You can't help yourself. He reached for the bottle. Rumors of possible alcohol abuse have dogged the mayor. There were even rumors of an affair with a staffer's wife. But of course, you can't believe everything you hear and read.

I want to make it clear that everything you've heard and read is true. Oh, wow. Okay. To get back on his feet, Gavin threw him. into his role as mayor, tackling homelessness. We better solve the housing problem. And high-speed rail. We'll be back in 2017 celebrating this completion.

Always yearning for a larger part, Newsom soon landed the role of California's official understudy, Lieutenant Governor. Now he could focus on exciting new projects, like ending homelessness and building high-speed rail. This is the biggest infrastructure project in California's history. his history. But as a versatile talent, Newsom was able to tackle these tough issues while also starting a talk show. Hello and welcome to the program. A platform he used to ask the hard-hitting questions important to the people of his state. You're not one of those method actors that becomes that character off-screen. Or you are. But this rising star couldn't be held down. And soon enough, Gavin ascended to governor, a role that would finally allow him to tackle

important issues like homelessness and high-speed rail. You can see the progress we've actually made. They're laying tracks to get to where they start to lay the tracks. Soon, this futuristic bullet train will take people from the thriving hub of Merced all the way to the shining metropolis of Bakersfield. But Governor Newsom has also faced setbacks, like having to hide half of his moneymaker during the pandemic and making some hard choices, like limiting public. gatherings, well, most public gatherings. Newsom broke his own rules by attending a lavish birthday

party at the famed French laundry restaurant. Like Chef Keller's short rib souvie, Gavin found himself in hot water. I made a bad mistake, so I want to apologize to you. Such emotion, such pathos, such humility, he can do it all. It was a dark time for Gavin. He even faced a statewide recall election. Luckily, the COVID vaccine meant he could show his whole face again, so he won easily. Now past the pandemic and the recall, no obstacle or small child could stand in his room. He was now totally free to work on his priorities like high-speed rail and homelessness. And this time, he actually made progress because company was coming over. Folks say, oh, they're just cleaning up this place because all those fancy leaders are coming in a town.

That's true. Take note, Hollywood. That's how you appeal to the Chinese market. Soon, Gavin was preparing for the role of a lifetime, president. Gavin Newsom, potential contender to replace the president as a Democratic nominee. But sadly, that year, there were two even more charismatic stars ready to shine. Then somehow Donald Trump swept back into the White House, and Gavin knew exactly what to do. We need to change the conversation.

And that's why I'm launching a new podcast. And while Trump was sending his soldiers into the streets, Gavin was ready to fight back in the tweets. California Governor Gavin Newsom has been mocking President Trump with all-cap social media posts. It turns out, Trump was the co-star that Gavin had been waiting for his whole career. A political star perhaps has been born. And so we ask that you consider Gavin Newsom,

a screen-ready Christian. bail type ready to tackle chronic problems like homelessness and high-speed rail. Plus, he dances while he talks for some reason. He's a governor with a future as bright as his smile and as his former carpet mate likes to scream. The best is yet to come. Gavin Newsom. He's more than a politician.

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Show. Free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash daily show. Back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is a comedian, actor, and co-creator of the hit BET Plus series. Now in its fifth season, The Miss Pat Show. Please welcome Miss Pat. Come on.

We made it. You made it. Oh, we made it. You made it. I mean, I remember 12 years ago, I was performing in Indianapolis. You were at the club. You said, can I do a quick little guest spot? I said yes, and I learned right away, don't ever give Ms. Pat the mic.

You are so funny. You've been so funny. This show is great. Thank you. How are you feeling about it at all? I never thought it would last five seasons. And, you know, every time they keep renewing it, it's the people.

We've been nominated for three Emmy NOMs, first time forever for BET, plus, you know, if it end tomorrow, I did what I came to do. I mean, it looks like this traditional sitcom. And except, and everybody loves Raymond, his brother's car won't start. And family ties, there's a problem at the high school prom. The Miss Pat show, you're harboring an immigrant from ICE. Yes.

I mean, it's real shit you cover. It is, because you know what the, I would say the networks are so scared today to tell the truth. And I, you know, immigrants are in my neighborhood. Be honest, all of us is from somewhere else. This is nobody country I don't know Who told small pecker white men That this is their country

But it's not And without immigrants What does this country will be? We can't laugh Yeah So Last year when we got together We decided to do an episode

And it was hard doing this episode Because the network pulled it twice Not only did they pull it twice They edited it was so much more That y'all won't get to see Because they was like no no no No, but I'm glad they finally let it go. And, you know, we just want to make a stand on real things in life

because we're tired of everything put in a cookie cutter. It's great. I mean, immigration, LGBTQ, sexual abuse. I've been sexual abuse. I mean, it is an excellent show. It is raw. And when I watch it, I'm going, oh, this is Miss Pat. Yes, it is.

This is your point of view. Excellent job pulling it off. You swear like crazy in it. I mean, I mean, it, shit, you have a whole season three different times. It's like, he eat my good. And I'm like, oh, this, this is a sitcom. No, I never said nobody to eat my fucking good. That's been since the 90s.

Okay. And I am a Christian now. Okay. But we do curse because I curse in my everyday life. And I didn't want to be a mama. You know, they never betrayed a mother like me on TV. But let's be honest, no matter what your race is. might not be your mama or your aunt, but you know somebody like me.

And that's the person that I betray. And people thinking, real life, oh, my God, you're my mama, you're my aunt. I don't know you, but I can be that on TV. It's excellent. Was there pushback from the network on swearing and... Let me say this. We started out at Fox. Fox sold up to Hulu, and I sat the N-word, and Hulu said,

Hell No, and dropped the show. And BET said, well, come on over here, black people. We'll let you be black. I love that. So, see, I don't. I wasn't aware of the journey that's taken. It was five years creating that show, along with three writers. It was a running joke for me.

I was like, everybody has had a piece of the Miss Pat show. And, you know, TV, you don't get a chance to recreate the same show three times. I was lucky. I got three deals and recreated that show three times. And I found a young man by the name of Jordan E. Cooper who understood my voice, who listened to me and helped me create it to Miss Pat show. This is crazy to me because I'm just. picturing us in some shitty comedy club green room.

Yes. You know, and again, I never should have given you the microphone. But you made it. I mean, it's not just the Miss Pat show. You also, your stand-up specials, you made it. Did we do last coming standing together? I mean, we did last comedy staying. I think I got eliminated pretty quickly, but we can edit that part out.

I think we went farther to me. I think we were... What is this cooking show you're doing? Because you famously do not cook. I do not cook. I don't know how to cook. A lot of people think I can cook, Mike, because I'm a plus size woman. This is strictly Chick-fil-A body.

Okay? But I decided, one day I was sitting there, I said, I can't cook, and it's the same old cooking shows all the time. I said, why don't I invite people into my home and show me how to cook? And I just started inviting people. Now I got people booked all the way up to March and April. And it's really cool because we talk about real life, and we're really making the meal.

And I'm really learning, too. Now, I ain't going to tell you I'm going to go do it again. Right. Where are you emotionally with our kids? current political situation? I'm at the same place you had. I watch you every night. What preparations are you taking, if anything?

Doom Day. So I've never been scared in my life. I grew up in the interstate of Atlanta, and I grew up in places where white people have a vision of what black lives is like. That's what I grew up in. And I've never had to buy gas masks in the hood. I got me two gas masks. I did not buy the kids one because they cost a lot of money. make sure. So the kids are going to have to use a tower.

Yeah. If it comes to. Put the t-shirt up over the face. Put the tower. I got really thick towers I stole from the hotel. Please steal from the hotel. They got really nice towers. And in my garage, I have two garages, and they're just full of stuff.

And my husband's like, what is wrong with you? And I was like, y'all don't understand what's coming. We might be stuck in our house. You know, ice might, when they get through with Hispanic people, you know we're next. We next. And I want you to come to my house. You jump my fist and you're going to be chicken breasts. You love that.

I'm sorry. I don't have a fence. I have a gate. Right. Fair enough. You made it. You got to get you made it. I'm not made it, Mike.

I'm doing okay. Hey, you got to stop saying, I got relatives out there. Okay, sorry. Damn. I have not made it. I work for Costa. As soon as I get, as soon as you show this, everybody going to be hitting me up through Facebook

and say the white man said you made it. You're in the fifth season of the Miss Pat show. Yeah. Unbelievable. I'm a PA. But in seriousness, I mean, your story is insane. You've been shot twice. I have.

You have been sexually abused. Oh, yes, many times. You lost a nipple. You've been incarcerated. Yet here we are, as a comedian, making art, making content. How would you advise younger people out there who, aren't so sure of their path at the current moment. I just tell people believe in yourself.

Nobody's going to believe in you like you believe in yourself. That was so many times when I started to tell my story about what I had been through. Had two kids by married man by the time I was 15. Got shot, been to prison, dropped out of school in the eighth grade, had been through so much. So many people did not believe in me and told me to stop. So many people say, how dare you talk about, you know, being sexual, being molested? How dare you talk about being shot selling drugs? I said, this is my story.

So I'm going to tell it. So believe in yourself, because nobody's going to believe in you like you believe in yourself. And I told my husband, 20 years ago, I said, I'm going to make you retire. Guess what, y'all? My husband is retired because I believe in myself. Oh, I love that. Thank you for your word. You're so funny.

You've always been funny. Please stay as funny as you are. The Miss Pat Show is now streaming on BET Plus. Give it up for Miss Pat. You're a quick mic. We're right back after this. You're the best. I was guilty of multiple skin care crimes.

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words, overwhelmed by Operation Metro Surge. A Department of Justice attorney told a judge that the federal government's system for processing and responding to immigration cases, quote, sucks. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show wherever you get your podcasts. Watch the Daily Show. nights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.