The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Trump's "Moderate" Abortion Stance | Da’Vine Joy Randolph

Episode Date: November 29, 2023

Michelle Wolf covers the latest stories, including Trump's "moderate" abortion campaign, UAE's plan to pitch oil and gas deals at the United Nations Climate Conference, and Red Lobster's Endless Shrimp disaster (featuring Ronny Chieng). Plus, a rant on Fox News's Jesse Watters. Grace Kuhlenschmidt meets up with astrophysicist Joshua Spodek to see what “living off the grid” in Manhattan really means, and if she can go electricity-free for 24 hours herself. And Tony-nominated actress Da’Vine Joy Randolph discusses how her love of cooking helped her get into the role of Mary in “The Holdovers,” how hard it was to channel a Boston accent, and how she’d love to star in a biopic one day.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?

I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. You're listening to the Daily Show. I'm Michelle Wolf. I'm Michelle Wolf. You know, yes. Welcome, welcome to the Daily Show. I'm Michelle Wolfe.

Who? Who? I'm Michelle Wolfe. You know, yes. Despite the advice of my friends in Comedy Central Standards Department, I am back for another night. And touchy-touchy. We've got a great show for you tonight. So let's get into those headlines. We're going to kick things off tonight with the white BET, Fox News. Every once in a while, check in with Fox News, just to see which race slash pronoun slash mnum I should be scared of now.

Let me guess, the brown one. I was surprised to find something different from Jesse Waters, Fox News Anchor, and the last face you see before blacking out at Sigma Kappa. Buckle up, guys, those are going to get worse, okay? So look, I turned on the news. I thought he was going to be talking about what's going on in the world, and all he was doing was meandering through the world's most boring Thanksgiving. like not for a little bit of time. He talked about it for like half of his show. So I made a to-do list. Best to do list in my life.

I'm actually mad because I crossed everything off on it on my phone and now I can't see how much I accomplished. I should have had a hard copy and and I should have organized a list geographically based on where I was going instead of just haphazardly because I bit off more than I could chew. I wake up, drank 60 ounces of water, drank my green juice, pot of coffee, hopped in the car with my list in my hand. But I couldn't even make it to the second errand without having to go to the bathroom. Stop it! Stop! What is this story?

Get this out of the way! Look, I mean, it is not a slow newsweek, okay? And you are sitting here talking about an incredible amount of liquid that you just ingested and how you're surprised it made you go to the bathroom. 60 ounces of water is a huge amount of water. And then you had a green juice and a coffee. You're just sloshing around out there like a human water bed. I kept watching because I kept thinking it's got to get to a point. He's got, he has to have something, there's so much to say right now.

He's got to have something to say. So in fact, we're going to keep this running and we're going to check back in. And you're all going to suffer exactly how I suffer. All right. But let's move on to something lighthearted. Abortion. You guys remember how Donald Trump killed Roe v. Wade right after he killed Ruth Bader-Ginsbroke after soon?

Well, now, Trump is making the confusing and strategic decision to run as a moderate on abortion. Yeah, Trump, a moderate on abortion. It's like the Kool-Aid man suddenly caring about walls. It's too late, dude, the damage is done, you big red bitch. Now don't let anyone tell you that abortion is not popular in this country. Even the man who killed them is acting like he supports them. What happened to Roe v. Wade, folks? Come on. Obama lost them. We're he supports them. What happened to Roe v. Wade folks? Come on. Obama lost them. We're gonna bring back Roe. We're gonna bring back Wade. I

talked to both of them. They're on board. I love to make deals. Oh wow! Oh wow! I can't believe I just won an award for the best Trump impression ever. Oh my god, it smells terrible. All right, before we move on, let's check in with the guy who looks like Rufi Magazine's Man of the Year. What news you got for us now, Jesse? So I check to see what time the car wash closes says 5 p.m. I think great I'm only 15 minutes away. So I get there at 4.45.

But when I get there, there's a big orange cone blocking the lane. I'm so sorry, the car wash closed early on Thanksgiving. How is this news? This isn't even news for your family. There's so much to talk about. And let's move on to some climate news. This weekend, the UAE hosts the annual United Nations Climate Conference, where countries from all over talk about. And let's move on to some climate news. This weekend, the UAE hosts the annual United Nations Climate Conference, where countries from all

over the world pretend to care about the climate crisis. And look, maybe you think I'm being a little bit cynical about this, but apparently the UAE is planning to use the climate conference to make new oil and gas deals. Which look, that might sound scandalous, but this is what they've always always always always always always always always always always always always always always the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theyau.u.u.u.u.u.u.e.e.e.e. the.e. the. the. the. the. the climate conference to make new oil and gas deals. Which, look, that might sound scandalous, but this is what they've always done. It's like giving hand jobs at Jesus Camp. It's fun because you know you shouldn't. This one's for Jesus. This one's for Jesus. Speaking of things you shouldn't do, let's see if evil David Schwimmer is done yet with

the never-ending story. And I'm making fun of them. Are you kidding me? You're getting rice pudding? And the waiter says, sorry, we've sold out of the rice pudding. Rice pudding is popular. Never thought it was. Isn't rice putting just like rice inside of pudding? Why is he still going?

Like, does the bus explode if he ends the story? the mystery that is rice pudding, we'll move on to some business news. Let's talk about Red Lobster. The restaurant, not my vagina. the restaurant, not my vagina. They offered endless shrimp for $20, thinking, surely, people are not going to eat that much shrimp. And instead, they lost $11 million. And it's so funny, because they expected people to order something else.

But instead, they were like, No, just more shrimp. All right, anything, anything to drink, anything. No, I'll drink the sauce. The moral of the story is, it's fun to eat out. And this time, talking about my vagina. For more on endless shrimp fiasco, we turn to Ronnie Chang. Would you describe this shrimp disaster as jumbo?

Absolutely, Michelle. Red Lobster learned a very powerful lesson here. Never underestimate how horny Americans are for shrimp. Okay? Absolutely, Michelle. Red Lobster learned a very powerful lesson here. Never underestimate how horny Americans are for shrimp. Okay, remember the movie Forrest Gump? It was a movie about a mentally challenged war hero whose girlfriend dies of AIDS. But America saw it and said, hey, tell me more about this Bubba Gump shrimp company. And now that's a real restaurant. That's how much Americans love shrimp.

Come on, Ronnie, you gotta give us a break. Is there anything wrong with people enjoying endless shrimp? Yes, there is. Because when this country offers you something endless endless, it's never actually good. It's always endless war or endless student loans or endless Jesse Waterwants. Also there's endless the endless guns and endless Marvel movies and theymeas are a national treasure all right and each and every character in them is precious and should get my own spin-off. In theaters, not this streaming-only bullshit.

Good luck to you on that. But tell me, how does Red Lobster recover from this loss? $11 million is a lot for a restaurant that smells like a whale's asshole. Well, not when you look at the broader economy, Michelle. Yes, Red Lobster takes a short-term loss, but giving Americans endless shrimp helps other industries, like commercial fishermen, toilet plungers, and the company that makes that thing that goes like this, chit-chit-chick, cich, clips. If all those companies kick some money back to Red Lobster, then they can keep

this promotion going. It's called Trickle Down Crustation, and it'll help Americans eat endless shrimp forever. Or until the ocean's ecosystem collapses. But it'll be fine, that's like a year from now, and my Marvel movie should be out by that. Oh, well then I guess we all win. Ronnie Chang, everybody. We have to take a break, but first, let's check in one last time with Matt and Tussaud's rough draft known as Jesse Waters.

And I noticed the dog's all wet. And she's like, oh, this is my dog, you know, kind of wet, you know, he just swim in the pond, and I'm thinking, this is kind of crazy. You're letting your dog swim in a pond degrees in a nature preserve? Well there you have it. The top primetime news show on the top cable news network in America over 16 minutes in and we got to wet dog. Listen I don't know why he spent so much time talking about all this. I don't know if he had to vamp because he story wanted to say it got censored or he had to run errands before and he had the to to the to the to the to their their. to their. their. their. the the to the the to the the to the the the the. to to the the. to to to to to to to to their. to to their. the the the the. to to to. to. to. I. I. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I's. I. I. I. the the. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. And. And. And. tip. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. I'm. if he had to vamp because he story wanted to say got censored or he had to run errands before and he'd never done that and he had to let the whole world know about bathrooms and stores and pudding. But I will say this was 16 minutes that I wasn't hearing about

January 6 being a field trip. So you know what Fox News, keep it up. All right when we come back we'll find out how to live live live live live live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live to live the to live the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their you their you their you their you their you their you their you their you their you their you their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their their. their their their their their their. their their their their the. t. tap. today. today. today. today. the today. the the the the th. th. thi. come back, we'll find out how to live sustainably and why it's up. So don't go away. John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, the weekly show. We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.

Welcome back to the Daily Show. We all want to live more sustainably, but what does that really mean? Grace Kulin Schmidt went out to find out. When you hear off the grid, you probably think of living in a cute cottage in the woods like Ted Kaczynski. But you don't have to venture way the f-finding to live like Ted. Meet Josh Spodeck, astrophysicist NYU professor and real-life Captain Planet. I used to empty my garbage weekly. Now I emptying my garbage once in 2019, once in 2018, once in 2017. Okay twin, I also only take out my trash

once a year. But recently, Josh went even further, taking his Manhattan apartment off the electrical grid completely. So what is your problem with electricity? Did it kill your family? Or did it? Because I'm now realizing that's kind of something that could happen. I do use electricity. I have my solar panels that I take up to the roof and charge the battery, but that's it.

I try to minimize my footprint as much as I can. Now, what exactly is electricity? And I know the basics. It's the stuff that's in the air. Electricity, actually, it's very complicated. When people think it's simple, I'm like, are you dumb? In one sense, it's simple and that it just works, because that's how it works. Gravity. So we've learned to control this power through wires and batteries and batteries and the basics and the basics and the basics and the basics and the basics and th. It. It. It. It's and the basics and th. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's the basics. It's th. th. th th th th thi thi thi thi thi the basics. thi thi thi thi thi thi the basics. the basics the basics the basics the basics the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. the basics. It's the basics. It's the basics. It's the basics. the basics. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi's thea thi's thi's thi's thi's basic thi's basic thi's basic thi's works, because that's how it works gravity. Gravity.

So we've learned to control this power through wires and batteries and things like that. So almost always you're going to be polluting. Give me polluting. And I don't want to pull it. I don't want to pull it. Josh's typical day as an eco-warrier starts with cardio. Going up 11 flights of stairs with his solar panels, his heavy, heavy solar panels. By the way, you know we're like breathing out carbon right now? Yeah, that's all part of the biosphere. Oh, fuck. But it's not bringing

new carbon from outside the biosphere. I'll be right up there, ma'am. Just give me like one second. Luckily, I was able to find a task rabbit to go up the remaining 10 flights of stairs. Connect the solar panel to the battery. Cool. And it's not just about saving energy. Josh has also been living packaging free for a decade. Americans throw away 268 million tens of trash per year, which is enough to feed 10 rats.

But Josh says there's a better way. I keep all my garbage here, and the last time I emptied this was Christmas 2019. So this is my fourth year on one load of garbage. Do you mind if I give this to you? I'd pass on it. Okay. And if you bring a reusable container next time you want to do that. People in the future will be dealing with it for 500 years or more. So 500 years, someone will be using it, maybe my great-great-granddaughter.

They won't be using it so much as it'll be in their bloodstream. Plastic, it doesn't decompose. It messes with the hormonal system, it causes disease. You have quite the imagination. Josh also uses the imagination. Josh also uses that imagination in the kitchen. So this is split pee, I got carrot, beet, cabbage, I just put in nutritional yeast. It's like really fragrant.

Bon Appetit, I hope you like it. Mmm. I think this would be better tomorrow after the flavors. It mixed a bit more. Sure. This way of life seemed really difficult. How was Josh keeping going going? I think this will be better tomorrow after the flavors mixed a bit more. Sure, sure. This way of life seemed really difficult. How was Josh keeping himself going? So this lifestyle may look like deprivation and sacrifice to others, but for me it's really

about joy. Totally. You seem very joyful. People will say it. You know, I compost, I recycle, and I do what I can't, but I have to balance that with living my regular life. Right. That's usually what I'm saying to myself. And you think, do I have to think about every other person on the planet every time I do anything? That's exactly how I think.

It's like you're reading my brain. But systemic change begins with personal change. I got to quote Abraham Lincoln. Okay. And I'll quote Abraham Lincoln. God bless America. He said that a lot. I probably, yeah. Wow. Josh had inspired me and I was ready to make a difference too, going a full 24 hours living life, Spodex style.

This is a day in my life with zero electricity and zero waste. I start my day by waking up. Whoops, no electricity means no lights. Luckily, my toxic roommate isn't home, so I'm using her food to make my famous green glow smoothie. I start with bananas, some beautiful organic kale, one scoop of collagen, and trip to pre-cycle, a packaging free store where you bring your own containers. Good thing I always travel with my tumper wares. Josh, if you're watching, check it out, man, I'm really doing this.

Hello. So these are oats right here. And then last but not least, this flour. Sure yeah. You can probably just weigh my whole hand just to make it a little bit easier. Okay. Oh my god, I did it. Uh, that was only 90 minutes. Fee me! Woohoohoo! Thank you so much. I mean you have the wrong apartment.

Get out of here. Little did I know? Things were about to get really, really bad. One percent? You said you had 5 percent 10 minutes ago! Feeck you! Okay. All good, bro.

All good, just me here with my thoughts. That's chill. I know what to do. Sadly, I didn't make it. But you know what I did make, a difference. And that's something they can never take away from me. Thank you great. When we come back, Dave, I enjoy Randolph. We'll be joining me on the show.

Don't go away. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me, the election, economics, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I

listed that fourth, but in importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with My guest tonight is a Tony nominated actor who stars in a new film, The Holdovers. Please welcome Devine Join Randolph. Oh, is it place? Is it great? It's okay. Just sit down. Thank you. Thank you so much for being here. It's wonderful to see you. So good to see you. Yes, we went to the same high school. Same high school. Yeah, yeah. But we were from, I mean, central Pennsylvania, and you did this movie.

You have to do a Boston accent in this movie. Was that hard to, I mean, I'm someone who's terrible at accents. Really? I mean, awful. I don't know if you heard the Trump one. You just got the award. But was it hard to get into the Boston accent? It helped because we were filming in Boston. So that helped.

But it was hard because the accent that I'm doing is a 70s Boston, African-American dialect. So I'm not sounding like Mark Walberg. You know what I mean? So everybody's walking around like Walburgs. And they're like, it's I'm like, it's different. It's different. So sometimes it would throw me a little bit. And so I just would have like certain key words that would help me get it back into it. Yeah, do you, can you share any of your key? No, I used to before they said action, I would be like, oh Mr. Hanum, Hanum, hanum, and just and just th, and just th, and just th, and just th, and just th, and just the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. And so I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, so I the, so I I I, so I the the the, so I the the the the the the the the th, so I th, so I th. So, so I th. So, so. So, so. I the an thr-a. So. So, so. So, so, so I the an thr-I th. So, so I th. So, so I Mr. Hanum, Hanum, Hanum, and just say his name and that were like kind of settle me back into it. Is there anything you specifically watched or listened to

to get into that like particular dialect? Donna's summer is from Boston, and so I would watch a lot of her interviews and stuff like that because it was more to the time period. And yeah, a lot of YouTube clips and stuff like that. And that kind of helped me constantly have that in my head. And that's great, you got to listen to Donna Summers and says someone like, Yeah, right? You could be listening to like Mark Walbert.

And you've done, I mean, you've done so many incredible things. You've got to work with so many incredible people. You know, Eddie Murphy, Paul Giamatti, Steve Martin. Are there any other people that you're like really wanting to work with? I really want to work with Bradley Cooper. I saw the trailer the other night of Maestro and it looks amazing. The way that he just died. I like people that just want to die fully in. He resembles him in an interesting way and I think that's both with the magic of you know movies but also his commitment to the role that it's just I was like oh he's really he's dedicated so that was exciting for me that I was like I

would love to work with him. Yeah that's it I imagine you want to work with like other people at top of their game and yeah I saw I saw Bradley Cooper Cuper in New York recently and I like it took took took took took took took took took took took took took to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I'm I their I'm I their I'm I they I they. they. they. they. they. I they. I the the the the told. I told. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I recently and I like it took me everything not to be like, hi. Yeah, exactly. He's a handsome one. Yeah. And what about other roles? Anything that like, I mean you've done a mix of serious comedy? I think I want to start getting into biopix.

I think that would be really fun and that I started off of singing so I think that could be a really nice way to merge the two. But yeah I think biopix and start playing some real women. That'd be great. Yeah. Get this lady some real women. Yeah. And your character Mary in this she's a cook. Do you, are you good at cooking? I am good at cooking. I love cooking, and that was kind of like, not a deal breaker, but that was something that I said to the director, Alexander Payne. I was like, if I do this, I really need real food. And so he was really cool about it. He was like, OK, what is the Christmas menu? And I was like, really?

Yeah. And so I cook in real life and real time. I cook soup, oatmeal, a roasted chicken, and a breakfast, because I'm hungover. That sounds great. I want to be in this movie to get that. You're gonna get me food. I don't, I would likethis movie to eat that. You're going to get me food.

I don't, I would like, I like to think I can cook, but I just don't. I don't do it because I don't like to clean up and... No, I gotta get somebody to clean up for you. I know, I need to make people to clean up for me. Absolutely. So that's a great. Yeah, I gotta meet better friends. Yes. And you, okay, so you had to pick up smoking for this role. Did you have a hard time quitting it? I love how you said it.

You had to pick up smoking. You had to get yourself an addiction. You had the joy of an addiction for this. Yeah. Did you have to quit? I was really to get to get th, you, you, you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, to, to, to, thi, to, to, to, to, to, to, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, you, so, so, so, you, so, so, so, so, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, the the the the the the the th. th. th. tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, so, to, so, so, so, to, so, so, to, so, so, okay, so, okay, so, so, okay, so, quit? No, no, I was really nervous about it. I was like, oh, I feel like I might have that addiction gene. What's going to go happen? And so they gave me, before we started shooting, the director sent over two big boxes of like natural fake ones. And it just wasn't working for me. And like because the, it was fake and it looked fake while doing it.

And so I started using American spirits because they have like, you know, there's different like, I call it gradients of addiction. Right. That nicotine gets like stronger and stronger. So I had like the blue pack, which I think is like the lighter of them. And then like of how I wanted to hold it because she's an avid smoker and so they were just I get it they were like the cigarettes gonna tell on you like if you don't know what you're doing they

can tell by how you're holding they're like she's lying she never smoked a day in her life so puff I was going I mean good I mean good for you thank you that is commitment thank jumped in there. And I smoke my life away. Good, good. It's an absolute pleasure to have you on this show. It's so good to see you. I'm so happy to see all your success. And I hope it keeps going and give this lady, real lady to say. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The holdover is now in theaters everywhere nationwide. We're going to take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show, wherever you get your podcast.

Watch the Daily Show, wherever you get your podcast. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. theaugh. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election.

Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? Listen to the Weekly Show with John Stuart.