The Daily Show: Ears Edition - William Barr's No-Show, Russia's Spy Whale & Jordan Klepper's Look at U.S. Activism | Charlize Theron

Episode Date: May 3, 2019

A whale is suspected of being a Russian spy, Jordan Klepper shares clips from his activism-oriented show Klepper, and Charlize Theron talks about her role in "Long Shot." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient-to-bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but

how many of them come out on Thursday. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcast. May 2nd 2019. From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York. This is the Daily Show with Trevor Noah. Ears Edition. Welcome to the Danish show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in and thank you for coming out on Trevor Noah. Our guest tonight is an Oscar-winning actor who plays a presidential candidate in her new movie Longshot. Charmise the runners joining us, everybody. So excited. Wow, you guys clap hard, it's like you work out.

Also on tonight's show, the North Pole is going Russian, measles are going viral, and Jordan Klepper is here to tell us what he's been up to on the road. But first, let's catch up on today's headlines. Let's begin with the big news out of Washington, where William Barr, Attorney General and Corporate Samwise Gamgee, was a no-show for his own hearing. A no-show, Attorney General William Barr leaves a House committee hanging when it comes to answering questions about the Mueller report. Democrats inch closer to a vote to hold Attorney General William Barr in contempt of Congress.

The House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jerry Nadler opened the morning by scolding the empty chair that was for the Attorney General. At least one Democrat chose to use a bucket of chicken to illustrate his opinion of bars no-show. Wow. Wow. This congressman brought a bucket of fried chicken to a hearing. And by the way, if you're looking at the black dude right now, you're racist. Yeah. Yeah. Because the white guy brought the chicken. That's who brought it.

Yeah. That's Steve Cohen, Memphis Congressman and guy with somehow too much hair and not enough hair at the same time. Apparently he brought that bucket of KFC to imply that the Attorney General was chicken for not showing up. I mean, at least that's what we assume. It could have just been his breakfast. And someone was like, oh, is that KFC some kind of political statement? And he was like, oh, yeah, yeah, that's what it is. And the drink is because we need to shake things up. So, look, this was clearly a stunt,

because a bucket of fried chicken isn't going to get Bill Barr to come and testify. But it will get Donald Trump to come and see Congress. Yeah. He saw that KFC bucket and was like, fuel up, Air Force One. We're going to Congress. Like, sir, it's only eight blocks away. You know what, you're right. We'll take the chopper. In other news, the crisis on America's southern border shows no

signs of letting up. And there's so many people coming in with children that the Department of Homeland Security can't keep up, which is why they've devised a new plan. The Homeland Security Department will soon be giving some migrants DNA task when they arrive at the border. The pilot program could begin as early as next week, and officials say it's aimed at stopping migrants from falsely claiming to be parents of children who are not theirs. This proposed rapid DNA test will involve a cheek swab. Then in about two hours, results will show whether an adult and a child are actually related. That's right, Border Patrol is taking a page from Moripovitch

and DNA testing all families who are seeking asylum at the border. Now, the Trump administration claims this is to prevent human trafficking. Critics say the plan is invasive, and it's just to dissuade people from coming over. All I know is this is bound to create a lot of awkwardness at the border. Yeah, because a family is going to show up after trekking through the desert, and the agent will be like, we need to make sure that this is your family. And the dad will be like, of course this is my family.

You can test, isn't that right, Maria? She'd be like, ah, way, how are they able to do a DNA test in two hours? Like it takes other services like six weeks. You know, I see this and I'm like, forget 23 and me. Americans are just going to start showing up at the border to get free tests. Someone's just going to be like, um, can you tell me, am I Irish or just tel And finally, in headlines, there are now more than 700 reported cases of measles in the United States,

the most in 25 years. It's showed up in churches, schools, movie theaters, and now it's going on vacation. The cruise ship on the Caribbean island of St. Lucia is ordered to remain docked and quarantined. On the free winds, a vessel believed to be owned by the Church of Scientology, one confirmed case of measles, with nearly 300 aboard. Island doctors are worried the virus could spread to locals if anyone is allowed off the ship. We thought it prudent that we quarantine the ship. That's right, there's no way we're allowing these people to come on the island.

It's like, why? Because they have measles? No, because they're Scientologists. We didn't even know about them measles. Nobody want these space Mormons running around our streets. What's that? Somebody made it in already sound the alarms. Boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom. So in case you're keeping count, thanks to anti-vaxes. America now has 700 reported cases of measles. In a country where it was eradicated.

700 cases, yeah. that's one case for every Democrat running for president. All right. Let's move on to today's top story. cases of measles in a country where it was eradicated. 700 cases, yeah. Which is one case for every Democrat running for presidents. All right, let's move on to today's top story. Russia, America's greatest enemy and home of the world's nastiest salad dressing. You may have forgotten that before Russia was hacking your grandma's Facebook page, they were doing actual superpower stuff like invading countries, overthrowing governments, and beating the shit out of Sylvester Stallone. And this week the world discovered what could be Russia's latest top-secret plan for world domination. A seemingly tame

the Luga whale was spotted off the coast of Norway and this morning some believe this whale is actually being used to gather intelligence for the Russians. It sounds like something out of a Cold War spy novel. According to reports, the white whale wearing a strange harness appeared to be harassing boats in the Arctic. The straps on the harness also had a logo, reading in English equipment, St. Petersburg. Some experts believe this Beluga whale was trained by the Russian military to be a spy. Okay, now I've heard it off. The Russians are training whales as spies.

That is next level. And also, I don't think you want a spy that can easily be flipped by just operating at fish, right? Like, think about it. It's not going to be a good spy. People will just be in the interrogation room like, tell me where it is, and the whale will be like, you'll never make me talk. Anyone want a fishie?

Gick-k-kick? But the question is, why would Russia have a spy whale swimming around the Arctic in the first place? Well, we'll tell you why in our newest segment if you don't know now you know. Now look, just because this whale was found wearing a Russian harness doesn't necessarily mean he's a spy. Whales are very sophisticated creatures for all we know, he's just into some threaten. a Russian harness doesn't necessarily mean he's a spy. Whales are very sophisticated creatures, for all we know, he's just into some BDSM. Ah, and who are we to judge? What you do with your blowhole is your business? But the reason people suspect this whale may be part of a crazy Russian plot is because in that region of the world, Russia has been getting up to a whole lot of no good.

The Arctic is the newest and most daunting front in the expanding global competition between the U.S. and Russia. These five and a half million square miles are under an intense battle for dominance. Russia has aggressively expanded its military capability in the Arctic, establishing and expanding a northern command, forming Arctic brigades. They even planted a titanium flag on the sea floor beneath the North Pole. Russia planted a flag on the sea floor? That's such a primitive way to claim something. Yeah, it's like a dog peeing to market's territory, which by the way, is also dumb. Yeah, I said it dogs, you heard me. Just because you pee on something doesn't mean it's yours. If that were true, I'd own every toilet seat in this building. And two trash cans.

I couldn't hold it, I'm sorry. But that's right. The Russians are trying to claim as much. Moscow recently opened a new military base that is closer to Alaska than it is to Moscow. They call this base Northern Clover. The Russian army has already deployed coastal defense rockets here and specialized Arctic anti-aircraft systems built to perform in the cold. It's all part of Vladimir Putin's long-term strategy to dominate the Arctic. This is the Arctic Brigade. In training, in case there's confrontation with Russia's the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the dominate the Arctic. This is the Arctic Brigade. In training, in case there's confrontation with Russia's neighbors.

The Kremlin has also previously released video of reindeer riding Russian soldiers. Okay, uh, I don't know what's crazier the fact that they killed the dude in training, or that the Russians have reindeer soldiers training for them. And I mean, I guess for the reindeer, it makes sense, you know, because they don't earn enough working for Santa one day a year. So, I mean, no, of course they need a side hustle. And in the Arctic, what are your other options,

huh? You either fight for the way, I've always wondered, why is a polar bear drinking coke supposed to make us want to drink coke? I don't get that. Hey, do you also eat dead walrus? Then I've got the drink for you! And I know you're probably wondering, why don't we just let the Russians have the Arctic? We don't need any more ice. Todd brought a whole bag. But it turns out, Russia wants the Arctic, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, toa, the toa, the their, their, toa, toa, their, their, the the the the too, the too, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the the the, the too, the too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, the too, too, the tha, tha, tha, too, too, too, ta, ta.a.s.a.s.s.a. ta. ta. too. too. too, too, too, too, too, isa, isa. Money. Across the Arctic, ice cover is shrinking at an alarming rate. Ice melt means rising sea levels,

potentially threatening the very future of humankind. But in the meantime, ice-free land and navigation routes in the Arctic mean access to resources is becoming easier. There are significant deposits of oil and gas as well as rare earths. There are also precious metals, such as uranium, gold, and platinum. Human beings are the dumbest creatures on earth. We're running around like the world is ending. But in the meantime, gold, woohoo!

But yes, the Arctic region is not just the world's largest ice skating rink. Turns out it's also got gold, platinum, and $35 trillion worth of oil and gas. And Russia may be the furthest ahead, but every country in the region is trying to get a piece of that ice. Russia isn't the only country mining for resources in the Arctic. The US, Canada, Denmark, and Norway also have laid claims to parts of the polar north. Governments see it as a land of new economic opportunities. Iceland's president says the melting Arctic is like discovering a new Africa.

Oh, here we go. White people discovering a new Africa. Just like they discovered it the first time, huh? It's funny how Western nations are like, we're sorry for colonization and assuming that all land is ours for the taking. That will never ever have... What's that? New land? Take it, take it now! Quickly, get me a flag.

We don't have any flags. They just pee on everything! Pee on it all! Good luck, Doc Doc Kic. We'll be right back. The Weekly Show, we're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the Weekly Show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. Welcome back. Welcome back to the Daily Show. Even though I never liked Jordan Klepper while he was here, I'm contractually obligated to have him back to talk about his new show. So please welcome my best friend, Jordan Klapper.

Welcome back, Jordan. Welcome back, Jordan. Never liked. No, man, that's just me being honest. Welcome back to the show. Dude, we miss you. We miss you on the show. How have you been? I've been good. I I I I I I I I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I just say, we miss you on the show. Are you kidding me? How have you been? I've been good.

I miss coming on the show. Like, I, I, I, I, one minute Jordan Klepper was on the daily show. Then Jordan Klepper was doing a talk show where you were playing a character, like a right-wing character. Yes. And then you stopped doing that, tho, and now, and now, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I the thi, I the thi, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I miss thi, I the tho, I miss tho, I miss coming the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. thean, I miss, I miss, I miss coming thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. the. the. the. I was I was doing a show. Do you need me to explain it back to you? Is that what it is? I was doing the daily show and then I did another show where I was playing a right-wing character and then now I'm doing another show where I'm out into the field. Yeah, but I'm saying why aren't you playing a right-wing character anymore anymore? Well because the network thoubts because 11th thirty is really crowded. There's. There's, like, like, like, like, like, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, th. th. th. th. th. th. I's, I's, th. th. th. th. I was, th. I was, th. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was. I was. I was, I was, I was. I was, I was. I was, I was, I was. I was, I was a. I was a. I's, I's, I's, I's, I was a. I's, I's, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. thin. th. th th th th th th thin. th th th th thin. th. th th th thin. th. th. th. th. fun. I'm moving earlier to have more fun. Honestly, so for the last like eight months, you know, I've been trying to keep you updated, but you won't return my calls. I do text. Yeah, you won't return my text either. But I'm not here to complain about that. I feel like you are. I mean a little bit. But I've been out in the world. I've been out in the world. Yes. We've th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thr-I that thatea thr-I tho tho tho thr-I thr-I thr-I thr-I thu thu-I thu thu thu thu thu thu thu th. th. th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've try th. I've try th. I've try th. I've try try try try try to to to to to to to to to to to tea to to to tea. to to tea tea to tea tea tea tea to go do a show that was about stories that don't get told, out in Real America.

We hear a lot about real America, what is real America, what do they care about? They care about a lot of shit. And it's not just what happens at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. And so for the last eight months, I've been out there in the field talking to people. I was worried about you though because, thakakereereeree, th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. th. I, I, I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. And, th. And, th, th, and, th, and, th, th, th, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, I, the, the, the, the, the, I was, the thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, toed, toed, too. And, toe. And, toed, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, th. And, th. I saw you doing this new show and then the next thing I saw a headline says Jordan Klepper arrested. Yes. And then I was like, damn, so you lose a father figure and now you turn to a life of crime. Why were you arrested?

This is what, because you won't return my text messages. But no, Jordan, you were seriously arrested. I think like, what, what ended up happening is we've been following activist, thii's an amazing group in Atlanta, Georgia called Freedom University. And it's a bunch of undocumented students and DACA students who can't attend public colleges. And it's because the Board of Regents down there won't let them. Right. Georgia is one of the hardest lockdowns on immigration policy altogether. And so I was down there and I was learning about this program, Freedom University. And myself and pastors and other teachers went th to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their students to to their students their students their students to their students their students their students to their students to a to a their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their their students their their students their students their students their students their students their students their students their their students their students their students their students their students their their students their their I was learning about this program Freedom University and myself and pastors and other teachers went to a board of regents meeting and we stood up and we protested and when you do that in

the South they arrest you. Was this your first time getting arrested? It was my first time getting arrested and you know how they joke about how those strips search you and they'll cough to see if something falls out of your anus. It's not a joke. That's what they do. Like right off the bat. You walk in there I'm like they're going to warm up to me, it's going to be another like you go in this line and I watch other people go in, drop it, cough and cough and the cough twofs to see if something falls out of your anus, which to me must t twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice twice to to the to to to the to to the to their, to their, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, they. right, they. right, they. Right, thi. Right, thi. Right, thi. Right, to to be thi. Right, thi. Right, thi. Right, right, right, right, thi. Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, thi. Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, th. Because everybody, they ask, two coughs. Two cuffs, if you pass the two cuffs, you go. Which if I go back and I want to bring something in, just practice for a few months. If you can get past the two cough threshold,

you can get anything in jail. And then I spent 12 hours surrowned by faith leaders, other people who were there in, somebody comes in, and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and to, and to, and tooom and tooom and tooom and tooom and tooom and tooom and tooom and tooes, and I, and I, and I, and I'm, and I'm, tooes, tooom-a, tooom-oom-oom-oom-oom-oom-a, tooom and I, tooom and I, tooom and I, to to to to to to to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, too..... too, too, too, too, too, too, tooanananananananan, tooanan, tooanan, tooanan, tooan, tooomorrow, too, tooanan, too, then about four hours in, somebody comes in, they're like, do you have a TV show? And I'm like, I want to stay here with everybody. I want to stay here with everybody. I'm like, no, I'm told, they're tell. They're tell. They're tell.

they're television. I'll be in a separate cell. About 30 minutes later, they come back and they're like, you're fine, go back into the general population. So you know, I'm famous, but I'm not that famous. Company said to the bay with a bunch of alligators hiding from the police for half a day as well. What was the story? What were you there for? Well, the story was me, Trevor. But in the grand scheme of things,

there were pipeline protesters who were trying to stop the building of the pipeline down there. And that's what the purpose of happen. And I wanted to see what that looked like. So I went down there, we woke up bright and early, 2 AM, they have to literally drive an hour and a half to get to the water and then an hour on the boat, up the bayou to try to get to where the pipeline is, so they can get on land get on land the they can get on land land land the land land land the land to get on land land land land land land land land land land land to get on land land land land land land and lock their can can can get on land and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock and lock their their their their their their their their their their their their their theases us, causes awake, and the boat goes under.

And we literally, us, $15,000 worth of equipment and a bunch of protesters find ourselves swimming to the shore and then literally picking up the camera. And we are, I think the word is, I think the word is, uh, F. Let me ask you this. I remember when you told me what the new show is, I was, I was, I, I, I, I, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th.......... th. thi. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. to, to, th to, to, th th to, th thi. the, the, the, the, the, told me what the new show was going to be. I'm on the road, I'm meeting the people, I was over. Like, how many times did you regret that decision? Because I mean, this is pretty sweet, you have to admit, huh? Look at this. We have lights, we have air conditioning.

This is pretty nice. We have wonderful here, you're in a thea. I've seen your apartment as well and it looks nothing like the La Quinta Inn in in Kaleem, I'm having a good time, my friend. Did you regret it or did it put you, did it connect you more with like issues that are taking place in America? I'll regret it. No, I think honestly it was, it was moving. Like to go out there and see people, like, here's's the deal is you know no matter what side of the aisle you are you probably look at what's happened in America today and you want it to change for the better whatever that

perspective is. And I think it was refreshing to go out there and to see people who were trying to change something and so that that that was inspiring to see. I love being out there. I love th. the the th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the th. th. I was. the. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I. I was. toda. I was. I was. I was. I was. there. I love being with people. Although there was this en we that set in after a month or so and I realized like after getting to the daily show and the opposition, I was like, what do I miss? It's like, oh, every day I would wake up and walk into a room full of really smart people. We'd craft a take, we'd write some jokes. Right. The jokes would be given to me, make me look attractive and not, the, the, the, the, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, their, and, and, their, and, their, and, and, and, their, their, and, and, and, and, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the jokes would be given to me, makeup would be put on, I'd be put on a suit, the lighting would make me look attractive and not gawkish, and then I'd be put in front of an audience and 150 people and I'd read those jokes and they'd be told to laugh at those jokes

and I would feel good at the end of the day. And in the bottom of there talking to these people, is there anything they said that changed your mind? Is there anything that we'll watch on the show where we go, ha, I never saw it like that? I mean, I think like, you spent enough time with people and you realize like, you know, we often see the snapshot., you're injecting fear into a situation. And I do believe that. I disagree them politically, but you spend more time with any group of people, and you realize they're doing that because they want to better this country. And I think that is, it's eye opening. I sat down with folks who are pushing back against immigration issues, again, who I don't agree with the same problems.

They're just dealing with it in different ways. I think if you give them space to make that point of view, then you can't just throw the baby out with the bathwater and disregard the point of view that they bring to the table. And I think alcohol makes us friend. That's like a big thing. Before I let you go, one of the moments that went viral recently was you sat down with Hillary Clinton and you got her to read the Mueller Report. I did. When I watched the clip, she genuinely looked like she was having the time of her life. Was she enjoying it as much as it looked like?

A hundred percent. I think there was something really cathartic for her. I knew I would ask her if she wanted to read it, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and I, and the, and I was, the, the, the, and the, and, and the, the, and, the, the, and, the, and, the, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, and, and, the, and, the, the, and, the, the, the, and, the, and, the, the, they, they, they, they, they.e, they.e, they.a, the, thr, thr, throwne, throwne, t t t t t t t t tooea.a, t t t too.a, t to read it. And we found somebody who was trying to get her to read the audiobook the Muller report and so we put it in front of her and she jumped on it. And I think it is true. And I think that half full of things she was warning people about 18 months ago. And I also think the fact that somebody is reading it. And also that that's seen as a threat to some people. Like, did you hear what Hillary Clinton did? She read the mother report. People are offended by this. Yeah, they're like, I can't believe it.

People are reading nowadays. Unbelievable. Well, dude, I'm excited for the show, because this is you doing what you do best, but it's got a lot of heart, it's funny at the same time, and most importantly, it involves you suffering a shit ton. So, thank you, my friend. Thank you, sir. Jordan's new show kicks off at 8th at 1030 p.m. on Comedy Central, so be sure to tune in. We got to take a quick break, but don't go away because Charlest de Ron will be joining us right after this! We'll be right back! We'll be right back! Welcome back to the Daily Show.

My guest tonight is an Academy Award-winning actor who stars in the new movie Long Shots. Please welcome, Charlest Iran. Wow. Welcome back to the show. Thank you so much for having me. Are you kidding? It's always a pleasure. And your new movie. We have to just jump straight into that. I was really impressed. Wow. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me. Um, are you kidding. Oh, thank. thank. the tri-Winning. the thirty. th. the the th. th. the th. the th. the the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. thin. te. te an today. today today today today today today today. thin. the the the the the the the the much for having me. Are you kidding? It's always a pleasure. And your new movie, we have to just jump straight into that. I was really impressed. Wow, thank you. Because two reasons. One, because it's a really funny movie. But two, because you said you would never be in a romcom kind of person.

You're not a romcom kind of person. No, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm not thi, I'm not thi, I'm not a thi, I'm not a thi, I was thi, I was th. I was th. I was thi, I was tho, I was tho, I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th, I was th, I was th, I th, I th, I was th, I was th, I was th, I was th, I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was thi. I was thi. I was thi. thr. I was thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. I was really thi thr thi thi. I was really thi to be like a death toll for me to even like read a script. That's like the front page? Yeah. How many people die? I'm in. Yes, exactly. That's usually like my bar. But no, I've, listen, I've always, I like the genre. Right. I think they're very hard to make. Especially if you want to keep your promise of making something really funny and really romantic. Yes. I think we delivered on both. No, can I tell you you have? Because this movie's gotten 86% fresh on rotten tomatoes,

which isn't everything, but it's hard to achieve that number. No, especially with a romcom, because I mean, like, romcoms, it seems like an easy formula. But you've got to be funny. You've got to have a little bit of hearts and a th and a th familiar story, though. You play a Secretary of State who is running to be the first woman president of the United States. Very familiar story. Yeah, I think that happened in Sudan.

And in the movie, it's a really fun story, because you play alongside Seth Rogan. And you guys are basically like this duo that's trying to make this thing happen. What's it like playing opposite him? Is he is he as the the the first the first as the the the the the the the the the the the th as the the th as th as th as thi as thi as thi as thi as thi as thi as thus thus thus thus thus thi? thi. the first the first thia? thia's thia' thia' thi. the first first first first first first. the first first. the first first. the first. the first. the first. the first. the first. the first. trying to make this thing happen. What's it like playing opposite him? Is he as funny behind the scenes as he seems on camera? He, yes. He is really one of the most, he's probably the funniest person. Right.

Outside of June Diane Raphael, who's in this movie too. Right. She's one of the funniest people. Both of she's amazing. Yeah, both of them have this natural ability to just, not aggressively be on, but just naturally funny, at all times. I also want to know who Seth Rogan's agent is. Like, how does he always get movies where he's getting with a gorgeous woman?

I need to figure that out for my life. I can help you if you want. Yeah, that like, that seems, that seems, that seems that seems that seems that seems to to to to to to to to to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help to help you if you want. Yeah, that seems like a skill that he tas. So let me ask you this. You've done a romcom now. We've seen you in action. We've seen you in drama. Musical? Shakespeare?

No, musical. Oh, should I do musical? Yeah. No, that's never going to happen. Why not? Because I cannot sing. We find a way. No, you know what? You're the kind of person who learns and knows everything. Do you know who? Did you know how to fight before you did atomic Blonde?

No, but I feel like you can learn that. There's a natural, like, I don't have pitch. Yes, but I feel like it's harder to learn how to fight. Because if you make a mistake in a song, your nose doesn't bleed. Like it's easier to learn. You have not seen me sing. And you can sing my nose, when you sing your nose bleeds? And my limbs just right. No, that is how bad I am.

I'm really dreadful. I'm a dreadful. You know who ruined it? I think before, like 20 years ago, you could still lip sing. Yes. But Hugh Jackman just destroyed that for... He's an amazing singer. Yeah, I mean, now that's the bar. No, I think you can learn. I think you're one of those people. It's a lot of work.

Here's the thing a lot of people don't know about Charlies. Is that like, you're one of those obsessive people who see something? And then once you start doing it, arts now. Yeah, well I'm about, I'm, I'm two weeks out of shooting an action movie in London, so I've been training for the last like three months. Right, right? You wake up at what time? Well I wake up every morning around five to get my kids ready for school. Yes. I take them to school and then I go and train for three, four hours. That's just you learning how to to fight again and you don't think you could learn how to sing. You should combine them, you should combine them and do both at the same time. No, because your voice isn't, like Bruce Lee was doing that as a, whoa, like you could do that in the middle of the thing.

You could be fighting while singing, you know whateron. Are you kidding me? I'm producing. We're making this people. We're making this movie. Um, so you're in the world of Romcoms. You've got an exciting movie coming out that's about Fox News and you're playing Megan Kelly, which everybody really wants to see. But while you're doing all of this, you're raising a family as you said said, right? You do it in the week. You like wake up to make lunch for your kids, and then you want to take them to school, and then you have barbecues with them on the weekend.

You realize that's not a normal thing for many super wealthy people, like waking up and making lunch for their kids their kids. Why do you do that? yeah, the kids need food. And then they'll be like, Maria, the kids need food. This is a true thing. And you wake up at 5 a.m. Let me tell you something now. When I have all the money that I want to, I'm not waking up. My kids will be like, because you want to. Kids, like, kids are, get ready for it.

Kids will destroy you. Like, I... We just said a negative thing is the most positive thing. No, in the most beautiful way, they will destroy you in the most beautiful. I mean the other way too. Right. Get ready for that too. Like, that's a fact. I love it. I love waking up and having those two hours as my kids. And making them lunches that they probably throw away at school and have absolutely no appreciation for.

You know what you should do if they throw away the lunch is a little trick that I've thought of is you should put a little bit of money in the lunch on certain days but don't tell them when. And then if you go like how was your lunch and they don't say, their, and then, their, they're don't their, their, their, their, their, their, they're don't their, they're don't their, their, their, they're, their, their, th. And, their, they're, their, they're they're their, they're they're they're they're they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're they're, they're they're they're they're, they're they're they're they're they're they're, they're, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're probably, th. And, th. And, th. tho, tho, tho, thrown. And, thrown. And, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, they're probably, they're probably, they're was your lunch? And they don't say, then you'd be like, oh, I put a $100 in there, you didn't find it? And then every other day, they're just gonna eat the lunch looking for the money. I mean, you should become a dad. You would be great. I don't think I'd like to be a dad. I'd like to be a good time give them back. If you ever want me to babysit. Why did you do that? Well Uncle Trevor told me to do that. Yeah, exactly. Before I let you go, I have to talk about all of the stuff that you're doing in the world with the Charlestorne Africa Outreach Project. Many people don't

know this about you and I was lucky enough to travel because of the work you were doing. I saw you going back home to South Africa, I saw you working and like changing people's lives on the ground, and now you found a fun way to do it. Fun for people to donate to charity, horrible for you because... Because if you want to sing karaoke with charliase, you can now. And we just talked about singing and I didn't even think about that. So you're going to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to the ch to donate to donate to donate to donate to donate the ch ch chaauoakauoakhauoakhau. to donate to donate to donate singing, and I didn't even think about that. So you're going to be doing karaoke with people if they join in.

It's for the Charlottes, the Lawn Africa Outreach Project, and it's also for the National Domestic Workers Alliance. What is that program? So that's, so I'm her to do this with me so that I could have somebody just to like ease the pain a little bit because it's gonna be so brutal. Yes, and it's for both of our charities. And yeah, we, listen, it's gonna be fun.

I mean, either way, I don't know how it's gonna turn out, but it's gonna be fun and it's for it's for it's for thua and it's for thua and it's for to be for to be for to be for to be for to be for to be for to be for to be for to be fun and it's for a good cause. So please, go on O'Mays.com slash, Long Shot and come watch me torture myself. But just so people understand what's happening, they get to go out with you, they get to go out and party with you, and you drink, and you do karaoke. We're going to go to a karaoke bar of to go karaoke, to go karaoke, to go karaoke, and to go, and to go, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and do karaoke, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you do karaoke, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and to, and to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to, to, to, to, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-a, toa, t to play a shot game. Oh wow. Yes, that we've... Getting drunk with Charlest de Ron, are you kidding me? Yeah, we set up the rules already, it's really fun and I mean that's the only way to do it. There's no other way to, for me to go and do this. Sober karaoke is very depressing. It was between, yes, it's getting really the th. one was better. Right.

And let me ask you this. Have you considered that maybe this could be the beginning of a real-life romantic comedy? What if someone who wins really sweeps you off your feet on this karaoke date? And then because I read in the news and then everyone texted me about it that they were like, Charlie's Thuron, I cannot, no one wants to ask me out. And everyone was like Trevor, thi me out. And everyone was like, Trevor, you know her. Text her for me. And you didn't text me. Well, what am I going to text you? What am I going to say?

Yo, yo, my friend John says hi. Listen, you knew, it wouldn't be the first. But you knew you were causing chaos with that. Oh, man. How can you as Charlie's throw on, tell? tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, to say, to to say, to to to text, told told to text you, to text you, to text you, to text you, to text you, to say, what to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say told told you, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me.. to me, charged you should have been charged by the fire marshal for that one I and you know what you're right I I brought this on to myself. Yes yes I I take full responsibility I can't complain about it so how many tex me how many people texted you how many people texted you a few well well you know what I don't know if the karaoke will find you loved you to the cune of you the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the if the karaoke will find you love, but I know everything will go to a good cause. So exciting having you back on the show. Thank you for being here. Congratulations on the new movie, Long Shot.

We'll be in theaters nationwide on May 3rd. And to enter to win a night out at Carriope with Charlize and to support her Africa outreach project. Go to O'Maze. The Daily Show with Krevernoa, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show. to follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and subscribe to the Daily

show on YouTube for exclusive content and more. This has been a Comedy Central podcast. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday. So exciting you'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about. All the things. the thir thir thi. thi. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the the the th. the th. th. to the th. the th. the th. the the the th. the the th. th. the the th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the th. the the th. the the th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. the th. the th. th. th. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart,

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