The Daily Signal - Pro-Life Home Serves Mothers Who Are ‘Alone in the World’

Episode Date: December 21, 2023

Home. For all of us, the word brings images to mind. Home is meant to be a place of comfort and safety, but for some women facing unplanned pregnancies, this isn't the case. And that's why St. Gianna and Pietro Molla Home in Warsaw, North Dakota, exists.  “There are so many people who really are alone in the world who might not, in North Dakota, be on the streets homeless, but maybe they're living coach the coach,” says Mary Pat Jahner, director of the North Dakota home. “Maybe they have family, but ... there would not be a means for gas money to [go to] an appointment or to get a car seat or things like that. So, you know, those are the people that we serve, the people who are alone in the world,” Jahner, founder of the St. Gianna and Pietro Molla Home, explains.  For 20 years, the large residence has provided expectant and new mothers with a place not only to find safety and provision, but also community and the love of Christ during and after their pregnancies.  “We live as a family,” Jahner says of the home for mothers. “We just have a few moms at a time and give them as much love during their time here as we can.”  Jahner joins “The Daily Signal Podcast” to share the mission of the St. Gianna and Pietro Molla Home, as well as stories of the women who have found refuge at the home over the years.  Enjoy the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Daily Sicle podcast for Thursday, December 21st. I'm Virginia Allen. Home. For all of us, that word home brings up various images in our minds, maybe emotions and feelings. Home is meant to be a place of comfort and safety. But for some women facing unplanned pregnancies, that's not the case. And that is why St. Gianna and Pietro Mullah Home in Warsaw, North Dakota, exists. The St. Gianna and Pietro-Mola home provides women with love and support in a faith-filled home during and after pregnancy. Pat Yonner is the founder of the home and she is joining us on the show today to share about the mission of the organization, but also to share stories of the women that she serves. Stay tuned for this encouraging conversation after this. Hi, this is Rob Louie, executive editor of The Daily Signal and co-host of this podcast. Each day we strive to bring you news you can trust.

We see it as our mission to cut through the liberal media spin and provide honest, thorough, and responsible reporting on the most important issues of the day. But we can't do it without your help. As we approach the end of the year, the Daily Signal is counting on donations from listeners like you. We are the nonprofit news outlet of the Heritage Foundation and rely on generous gifts from our supporters.

Please help us by making a tax-deductible year-end gift. You can do so by visitingdailysignal.com Your gift will ensure that we continue producing cutting-edge journalism and investigative reporting. Again, that website is daily signal.com slash donate. Thanks for listening. We are grateful for your support. It is my honor today to be joined by Mary Pat Yonner. She is the founder of the St. Gianna and Pietro Mola home in Warsaw, North Dakota.

Mary Pat, thank you for being with us today. Oh, you're welcome. Thanks for having me. So like I mentioned, you're in North Dakota, a pretty rural area of North Dakota, and you have a home there, the St. Gianna and Pietro Mola Home, and that is a safe haven for moms who are alone. Moms who are facing unplanned pregnancies who need support. Explain a little bit of the history of the home, if you would. If we started 20 years ago, we're in the middle of our 20 year anniversary, and just kind of seeing the need around here, not every unslaned pregnancy. You know, people don't necessarily need a home to live in, but yet there are so many people who really are alone in the world who might not in North Dakota be on the streets homeless, but maybe they're living couch to couch. Maybe they have family, but there's no means.

There would not be means for gas money to an appointment or to get a car seat or things like that. So, you know, those are the people that we serve, the people who are alone in the world. We've had from age 12 up to age 38, and, you know, some come for a few weeks, a few months, and even a few years in some cases. And we just walk with them where they're at, letting them choose to place for adoption, which we have many who choose that or to parent and help them with that. And even if they do place for adoption too, they can also stay here. We have one girl who's a senior in high school who placed a little over a year ago, and she's still with us. And so that's what we do. We live as a family.

We just have a few moms at a time and give them as much love during their time here as they can. That's beautiful. So how long, I mean, you mentioned mom stay for different periods of time. Is there a time limit on how long moms can stay? The longest anyone has ever stayed is three years. And we really don't set a time. It's really to set the goals, you know, for them.

So when they come young as a 14, 15, 16-year-old, maybe that goal is to graduate from high school. And then that would be their time. You know, as long as they're, you know, we're very rural, as you said. So I don't think anyone's going to choose to live here for the rest of their life. You know, it's not a big city where they're choosing that. And so we want to help them transition out when they're strong, you know, when they're ready to go and, you know, prepared with parenting if that's what they're doing

or a job or skills. You know, we focus a lot on education while they're here to getting their GED or high school diploma or some skills. online classes or CNA, things like that, that they start working on. So that's kind of really just to, you know, each one is so individual to kind of set those goals. And, you know, a lot of times, you know, it's around a year, nine months to a year that people need.

But it's always more for younger and less for older. Sure, sure. Is there an application process that women have to fill out in order to be approved to come and live at the home? It's pretty simple. They just really need to call. And if we have availability and if they're pregnant or else have just a newborn and need a place to stay, there is an application. And it's on our website.

However, what I've found is, you know, people who are desperate, they will write down anything. And our application is really, so how can we best serve them? And so I just have them fill that out when they come here. So we have all the information that we need, you know, what their history is, what their background is, and how we can most help them, you know, through different counseling or. educational means or medical needs, whatever they would need. And so I think sometimes the people

who come here are afraid and alone and think that they have to look really good on paper. But the reality is everyone who comes here has some issues and many gifts at that same time. And so we want to see them grow. And so if they want to be here, we usually accept them

as long as we are able to have a place for them and be staffed. Come as you are. I love that. It's beautiful. I've seen pictures and videos of the home online. It's this big, beautiful brick house. How many women can you all have staying there at one time? How much space do you have?

Well, it's a 9,000 square foot building, but it includes a chapel and lots of public spaces and things like that, too. So the most we've ever had is six moms and six little ones at a time. They were all parenting and stuff. And that was a lot. Our average is three or four to do it the way that we like to do it. And that's really what God has asked of us. We don't usually turn people.

down because of space. You know, we would keep saying yes as long as we can say yes. Right now we are short staff. And so I'm hesitant to. I'm just praying that we get a couple host mothers very soon and that we're able to, you know, continue to say yes. But that would be a concern is, you know, that we can meet their needs on all their appointments and things like that.

You know, they go to counseling. They go to school. They go to doctor appointments, you know, whatever they need. And so we want to make sure we can handle it, generally speaking. We have three house moms, and right now we have the assistant director and myself, as well as some of the first children who were born here. They've been helping too. So we have Deanna who turned 19 and Cassidy, who is 20, and they were the first baby and the first little one who came in. So they've also been helping us.

But we are short-staffed right now. But like I say, we really live as a family and really dedicate a lot to the women while they're here. So the average is about three or four moms at a time. Okay. Okay. Okay. What's an average day like at the home? That's such an interesting question because every day is so different and it always, you know, seems to surprise what you think is going to happen in the morning. And that's always the question when we're interviewing people. They say, what's your typical day? And, you know, we all laugh. And then they've been here a couple months and they're like, yeah, we see why you laugh. But, you know, just get up in the morning, get going, adults who go to school, you know, do that. You know, if people have little ones, obviously, that's the priority. Sometimes newborn moms are sleeping till noon. because they haven't slept all night.

We do have daily mass in our home here. Now that is not required, but the staff, we mostly all try to go in the morning. You know, we and just gear things around Father Joseph, who works with us, is very flexible. So we have masks when we get everyone out to school, you know, and things like that. There's not a lot of set times just based on everything that's going on, you know, eat lunch together and go to appointments during the day. There's just a lot of driving. and taking care of those needs or working on their, you know, classes online or things like that.

We do some parenting classes with them. If they need that here, some of them are second-time moms and don't need it as much. So we really try to individualize. And then, you know, after school, we all get dinner ready together and things like that and eat together. In the evening, you know, depending on if there's homework or we play a game or we watch a movie or bike ride or fire pit or, you know, just really, if you think of your normal days, You know, yesterday we had a big adoption ceremony. Tomorrow morning we have a baptism. You know, so day by day things change here.

You know, we work with a lot of our former moms who come and go and, you know, come for different needs here and really just try to incorporate living as a family. And so as everyone's schedule at home changes, so does ours. Yeah. And we like it that way, you know, instead of just very structured that this is always what we do at 9 o'clock, that would never be true. And I think that's, you know, the way we keep our sanity, too, is just going with what God gives us each day. Yeah, it's a real life, real life as it happens. Do most of the women who come to you, have they already decided either that they're going to parent or that they want to adopt? Or do you have often moms reach out and say, you know, I'm still in a process of considering, you know, what I'm going to do?

and I'm maybe even still considering abortion? We do. I think the calls a lot of times people are still considering abortion when they call us. And so, and we've had even many people who, and I really mean like probably seven or eight who have called, who have told me later they never came here, but knowing that there was an option, if everything started to falling apart, that they were able to choose life, which is such a great gift, you know, to me. Now, if they move in here, you know, they've decided on life. You know, we know that and that they live here for that.

And I would say almost everyone who comes here with the exception, I can think of two moms who came and they wanted to place for adoption. But most of them come planning to parents. But I think because of the openness to adoption here and seeing other people who do or adoption counselors being around or, you know, I ended up adopting a little one or things like that, I think that sometimes, especially for the young ones, it's something that they never considered.

And I think that's kind of in our society. It's often something that people don't consider. They think that the choices between abortion and parenting. And not everyone can parent, you know, right then, but adoption really is the choice. It's the choice it should be. It's the choice that brings pure joy and pure love. And every mom who's ever placed for adoption here always says it's the hardest thing I ever did, but I'd do it again.

I would choose it again. It was the right thing. And, you know, we believe in open adoptions, very open adoptions, where these birth moms get to know the adoptive family even before that baby's born. And, you know, that hopefully the adoptive family really loves and cherishes that mom, too. And it's just a bigger family. And it's a beautiful reality if people would embrace it and see it for what it is. And I think just in the pro-life world, until we understand and promote adoption more, you know, we just, you know, need that option. It is the option. I don't know how to explain it, but it's so beautiful. It's so

beautiful. And yet hard. You know, we just had that happen here last night and, oh, I cried so hard, you know, because it's just, you know, selfless love and yet that adoptive family is so beautiful, too. And, you know, I think everything God intends when the situations are difficult, that is the right choice. And it brings good for the birth mom. It brings good for that baby. And it brings, you know, good for the adoptive family. And so, you know, it's a triple win where we know that abortion destroys, you know, the life and oftentimes the life of the birth mom, too. You know, it's so hard.

Even though God forgives, nature doesn't, you know, nature. The reality is moms are to nurture life and, you know, abortion takes that from them. If you don't mind and if you're able to, I would love just to hear a little bit about the story behind the adoption, that beautiful adoption celebration yesterday. And for the mom that came and said, I want to place my child for adoption to, you know, how that family was found. What was that process?

I can tell you a little bit about it, about all the details. And this was a very unique one. And often we say that here. There's always a unique story. And so this little girl that went last night was actually 14 months old. And her mom started out, you know, parenting her. and things just got very overwhelming, and some of the issues from her past came in.

Probably some of the decisions, you know, she didn't have any other options. And she knew this family who is actually, they're in a therapeutic foster to adopt program from high school. And she's a bit older mom and, you know, just wanted them. And she had been unable to care for this little girl for the last five months, actually. she was in my home until last night. And so it was hard for me too, probably harder than most, you know, but also so beautiful, this family and this little big brother that they have, but this little boy who had prayed so hard for a little sibling.

And, you know, that they had that last night. And, you know, we all cried and then we all were downstairs having pasta and celebrating. And, you know, they left a really happy family. And I think that everyone in there, we have the social workers. who had worked with us and stuff, you know, knew that is the right thing, that is everything that God intended. And this little girl was so happy waving by and blowing kisses and probably having no idea, really, you know, but she will be so loved and she already is so loved.

Wow. What is the, and I, you know, as you say, probably not every story is quote unquote normal. Everyone is different. Everyone is unique. You can't say there's a cookie cutter answer. But you have a mom who comes to you and says, I'm pregnant, and I would like to put this child up for adoption. What are the steps? What's kind of the normal process that then transpires?

Excuse me. The normal process is we start adoption counseling. And I've done many, worked through many adoptions. So, you know, I can give some of that. But we always work through a licensed agency, licensed here in North Dakota. And that's part of our, you know, state law that we do that. However, that doesn't mean that someone from another state, you know, couldn't also, if they are ready, if they have gone through their agency here, then they would just do the final steps through the North Dakota agency. So, you know, people are able.

And, you know, so we want to make sure that they understand it. And I think, you know, part of adoption is to know that there will be grief, that grief is right away. Usually, I mean, this little girl was 14 months last night or I adopted my daughter at three years old, you know, so there's unique situations. but mostly, you know, they place right after the baby's born and their emotions and their hormones are so high to begin with and to then selflessly place that baby in someone else's arms is, you know, every emotion, you know, it's very difficult. But so is getting up all night long with the little one feeding every two hours and, you know, and teenagers, you know, there's grief always in life. But, you know, with the placing a newborn, that grief is intense right away. And I think that it has to be a reasonable decision is why they want to do it and have those reasons and to fully understand that it is just selfless, pure love. I know, you know, Father Joseph, who works with us in the homilies, that he chokes up during, you know, always with every adoption ceremony that we have here.

It's like usually most people give and they receive a little bit back, you know. But when you're placing a child for adoption, you're just giving. Yeah. You're just giving. And, you know, it's hard. and it's not seen very often. And so these young moms really teach us a profound lesson, you know, who are able to do that. And so we work with them, you know, with them they can see profiles online.

Sometimes someone knows someone like this one last night, knew someone and they happen to be ready. But if they're not ready, they can also get ready. It takes months, you know. But, you know, that doesn't mean that guardianship can happen earlier before an adoption is finalized. Usually always once placement happens, there's another six months in the home, too, to make sure that everything is going very well. Start, either have them here for a meal or if they want to go out to a restaurant, depending where the couple is from, and really to know and, you know, leave it in their

hands, you know, if they continue with the adoption plan, do you choose this couple? Or would you like to look for someone else? And of all the years, I've only had one who did choose someone else. But mostly, you know, they already know what they're looking for. And it's always different, you know, just because I have potential adoptive that way. So it's like, well, what should we put in our, you know, profile? We should put exactly who you are because the little girl last night went to this just far family. And, you know, her birth mom, that spoke to her.

And that's what, you know, she wanted so much, you know, for her because that's how she grew up. And that's, you know, a lot of times people look for something, you know, someone else would want in a big city or someone wants this baby to be the first baby. And others want, well, they want siblings, you know, for their little one. And so, you know, I think just, you know, put who you are and they choose and then we meet. And the agency does, you know, all the hard work. They do the paperwork and, you know, set up the court date to finalize and things like that. But I think it's something that, you know, prospective adoptive families, you know, need to know, you know, there is a need for them. I know sometimes the weights are long and hard, but to pray hard and I've seen it happen fast.

You know, we have a year ago a little boy's heading in his. parents started the adoption process like in November of the year before and then adopted him September 2nd, you know, so less than a year. So sometimes it just happens fast. You know, it's really, really got choosing the family and bringing, you know, families and hearts together and can't say enough good for adoption because I think it's something that we don't proclaim. And it is so beautiful and it is the right option. When we talk about being pro-choice, this is the choice. In all the years that you have run the home, do you have a favorite adaption story?

And I'm sure it's hard to ask you to pick one, but maybe one that you often think about and reflect back on. Well, it would be my own. Adapting from my little, my little Aubrey Rose Joy. She came here with her mom. Her mom was six months pregnant. And then she had her July 21st. And ironically, that was one of the very few babies. I was not in the delivery room for.

We had a house mom who was going into medical school and another one who wanted to be a midwife. And so they really wanted to go. And I said, oh, I've been there for that precious first moment for so many. You know, you should go. And so it's just kind of ironic because, you know, mostly I was always there. But anyway, I got to see her, you know, shortly after. And it really turned out we went to the lake right after. When she came home from the hospital, we always go on a family vacation here.

We have someone who sponsors that for us, and it's really wonderful and so wonderful for me because I'm not in the office at all. And so I got to hold this little buddy almost the whole week and got to give her her first bath. And, you know, I really was part of her. And the mother was young. And she had had a really hard life. and she was from one of the Native American reservations and really in social services custody, the young mom. And so when little Aubrey was three months old,

they wanted her birth mom, Hannah, who we keep in touch with, to go for more treatment and counseling and things like that. And so she left kind of unexpectedly. And so we said, it was a Thursday. I remember this all clearly. We said, well, we could keep Aubrey. You know, and I'm thinking they would say, okay till Monday, you know, until we figure out a plan for her.

But the reality is she never left. She never left. And so when she was here as a two-year-old and her mom had moved back home instead of here with us and, you know, just not bonded because of the timing, you know, that she was away. And I had had her in my home and we were very bonded. And so when she was a little over two, I said, but, you know, would you ever consider? And she did. We went through the tribal court and beautiful.

So it took a little bit of time. But when she was three years and a few months, on October 30th, we just had celebrated the anniversary. She became my little girl. I added the word joy, Aubrey Rose. Her mom really wanted a name with an A. So she picked Aubrey. And then I had said to her, I said, well, you have such a beautiful middle name, Roe is how about a few names?

So she did that, but I helped with that. And then I added joy at the end because she is a joy. She's, I mean, she's got her days. She's very strong, a little seven-year-old, and she thinks she runs the home here. But she is pure joy. And it was a really hard night for her last night, though, to see it the other way to let our little little girl go. So that was hard. And I know she cried a lot.

She's like, I like the family, but I don't want her to go. Yeah. So, yeah, she would keep every baby here. She would do things that, you know, really is all her family. and she would want them all to be here. A big heart. It's beautiful. I could tell you another beautiful story, though, and kind of a heartbreaking story, but I think it's kind of the crux of our work here with Tiffany.

And she was one who came planning adoption. She was one of the two who, that was why she came. This was her seventh baby, and she had had a really hard life. She was 32 years old. And she was trying her best to maintain a relationship with her other children, didn't have all of them. in custody, had a lot of issues, but yet was the sweetest woman. You know, she loved to sew and she loved to make like the Native American fry bread and things like that.

And she was only with us here a couple of months. And it was right around Christmas time. She came in November and left in January. But she was with us. So we got very blessed by people who are good to us. And they had sent gift cards at Christmas. And so she was able in January, she got her hair. done all highlighted and colored and got her nails done.

She chose pink, pink nails. I remember she didn't know if she was having a baby girl or a baby boy. And it was a girl, so she thought it was so appropriate. And she looked so beautiful. And I took pictures and she said, I feel so loved. And I said, well, when was the last time you felt loved Tiffany? And she said, well, when my grandma was alive? And I said, well, when did she die?

And she said, when I was 14? And she was 32. And, you know, that's our women. and who we have, who need to be treasured, who need to feel loved. And so it's just so beautiful. And she had a little girl named Ruth, who she did place. And she was so proud of choosing this family and placing. And she had had a passive drug use, and there was lots of abuse she was with.

And she ended up being murdered later when she went back, which was really hard, you know, and hard to just think of their lives. But I think that when she was here, she felt loved and she felt beautiful. And, you know, it was just so good. And that adopted family is beautiful. They've actually adopted a couple more of the little ones from that family. And really, you know, live to honor her as well. And, you know, it's just a lot of hurt.

And I'm sure Tiffany is probably, you know, just free at last, you know, with divine mercy, you know, with our Lord. She had a really hard life. And so anyway, that's another adoption story that just rings hard in my heart, you know, just that it was so beautiful. And that's what she wanted. There was no needing to convince her in any way. She wanted good for her little girl. Yeah. So profound.

So just the work that you all do is absolutely incredible, truly being the hands and feet of Jesus to those who desperately need it and who deserve it. I want to encourage all of our listeners visit your website, St. Gianna and Pietro Mola Home. You can find out more about what you all do by visiting S-G-P-Mola, that's M-O-L-L-A home.com. Again, that's S-GP-Mola Home.com. And the St. Giana and Pietro-Mola Home, it's a 501C3. If you want to support the work that they're doing, you can find all that information on the website. But Mary Pat, I really appreciate your time today, sharing your own heart and sharing so many really powerful stories about the work you all are doing. So, well, thank you. Thank you for having me.

Thank you so much for being with us today. We're going to leave it there for today's show. We will see you right back here at 5 p.m. for our top news edition. And in the meantime, if you would, pull out your phone, your laptop, look for the Daily Signal podcast, leave us a rating and review. Let us know your feedback. It's incredibly helpful to us, especially as we near the end of the year and look towards a new year, we would love to know your thoughts on the show. Have a great rest of your day. We will see you right here at 5 p.m. for top news. The Daily Signal podcast is brought to by more than half a million members of the Heritage Foundation. Executive producers are Rob Bowie and Kate Trinko. Producers are Virginia Allen and Samantha Asheras. Sound design by Lauren Evans, Mark Geinney, and John Pop.

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