The Daily Zeitgeist - Sham Trial? Kanye’s New Crew? 1.15.20

Episode Date: January 15, 2020

In episode 549, Miles and special guest host Blake Wexler are joined by comedian Chris Crofton to discuss the Senate impeachment trail, Republican Senators considering bucking Trump on war powers, a Murdoch family member defending climate change, Felicity Huffman's daughter booking a tv role, Kanye West joining a MAGA Evangelical crew, the history of Philadelphia Cream Cheese, and more!FOOTNOTES: White House expects GOP defections on calling witnesses in Senate impeachment trial Senate GOP Wary Of Voting To Dismiss Impeachment Case Early In Trial Up to 10 GOP senators consider bucking Trump on war powers James Murdoch Slams Fox News and News Corp Over Climate-Change Denial FELICITY HUFFMAN DAUGHTER LANDS IN 'TWILIGHT ZONE' ... After College Admissions Scandal Kanye West Joins Dominionist Pro-Trump ‘Prophets’ for Stadium Prayer Rally How Philadelphia Cream Cheese Took Over the World WATCH: Africa Express - Johannesburg Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In 1982, Atari players had one game on their minds, Sword Quest, because the company had promised $150,000 in prizes to four finalists. But the prizes disappeared, leading to one of the biggest controversies in 80s pop culture. I'm Jamie Loftus. Join me this spring for The Legend of Sword Quest. We'll follow the quest for lost treasure across four decades. Listen to The Legend of Sword Quest on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, fam. I'm Simone Boyce. I'm Danielle Robay. And we're the hosts of The Bright Side, the podcast from Hello Sunshine that's guaranteed to light up your day.

Check out our recent episode with Grammy Award winning rapper, Eve, on motherhood and the music industry. No, it's a great, amazing, beautiful thing. There's moms in all industries, very high stress industries that have kids all across this world. Why can't it be music as well? Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th, 2017, was assassinated. Crooks Everywhere unearths the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks. She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country

into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere starting September 25th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Kay hasn't heard from her sister in seven years. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. What was that? That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. Can Kay trust her sister or is history repeating itself? There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror

thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Well, hello, the internet, and welcome to Season 116, Episode 3 of the Daily Zeitgeist, a production of iHeartRadio. This is a podcast. Like I said, every time we go, we could look at this, we go to a graveyard. We see the headstone. It says United States of America. We dig up the corpse. We look inside the skull and go, what is going on inside of your brain, America? And officially off the rip. You know how it is. Well, I say fuck Koch brothers, like as in the Koch brothers, as in Koch industries, as in the Koch to puss and also fuck Fox News.

OK, now it's Wednesday, January 15th, 2020. My name is not Jack Reformed. That's usually where you would hear that part. That's because my name is actually great, a.k.a. Penny Loggins, a.k.a. Thick Springfield, a.k.a. Lionel Bitchy, a.k.a. Phil Ballins, a.k.a. Amelie Joel, a.k.a. John Cougar Felincamp, a.k.a. Michael WhackDonald, a.k.a. Baldin Oates, a.k.a. Kenny OG, a.k.a. The

Doobie Brother, a.k.a. Skrilly Dan. Oh, wow. That's a lot of falsetto in there. Oh, yeah. And that's what I'm guessing because yesterday I went to my Cindy Lopper, a.k.a. They Were Feeling the Falsetto. Shout out to Crispy Meme Donut, Chris Yamaguchi, man, you know what time it is. And we know who it is, Walnut Chestnut Jr. at Water Chestnut 2 on Twitter.

Yeah. Sounds like a cool name. Sounds like a cool guy. Turns out he's not a walnut. I believe he's actually some form of sea. He's on the high seas. And that could have just been him sipping a high sea. I don't know.

Yeah, of course. Now, who is that? Wait, who are you? Maybe you should announce yourself, or I will announce you. Today's special guest co-host is none other than the lord of chaos himself, Blake Wexler. This is Blake Wexler, a.k.a. the Vince Vaughn Spawn, a.k.a. Blaker the Handshaker, a.k.a. He who has not Clemson'd, cast the first stone. L-K-A-L-S.

Woo! It's the Chaos boss himself. LS, are you feeling good about that national championship? I feel good for the coach, Ed Ogeron. He had, like, a rough career. People made fun of him a lot, and then he got to win a title. And then, you know, it was the tragic thing that happened with the, I believe, the defensive coordinator, offensive coordinator.

He had family pass away in a flight. There was that private plane that crashed a few weeks ago. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, you have to feel good for those reasons. Wow. Yeah, I'm not, like, tied to LSU. Why does shit get real so quick no matter what we talk about? That's right.

There's a lot of shit out there. A lot of shit out there. Yeah. Well, you know what, Blake? Thanks for filling in. You know, Jack is out there. He's doing his thing out there. I don't know. Well a union job yeah and i'm in the the host the podcast union yeah the dues are very cheap yeah they're and the health care shit yeah i think the do you to pay

your dues you give a promo code it's true for some kind of product uh now now we have to talk about our guests who's in the third seat? Oh, y'all are in for one It's Mr. Magnificent himself Mr. Bigfoot Hunter himself Take it down The Yeti of Spaghetti I don't even know what that means

Chris Crofton, baby How are you guys? How are you, man? I'm glad to be here Yeah Real glad to be here Yeah, the Yeti of Spaghetti I don't even know where that came from.

That's fine. Ever since that Mount St. Helens thing you told us about, about all the Bigfoot bodies that were covered up in the Mount St. Helens. Well, you only eat pasta in the woods. Well, yeah. I mean, whatever fits the – I mean, I don't know really exactly how this AKA stuff works, but as far as I can tell, it's a bunch of nonsense. So I think that Yeti spaghetti

sounds fine to me. Actually, a more fitting one is AKA hashtag cold brew got me like. Yeah, whatever. And you're not drinking cold brew. You're being careful. Don't tell people. Well, you are caffeinated. Oh yeah, I had cold brew earlier, but now I'm having a mocha because this show, can I say it, we're taping

after noon. And usually I like to come you know yeah start your day give a podcast both barrels of my morning yeah of my morning mojo yes sorry now you're getting your morning no no and then uh and i have the cold brew and then it's like you know it's comedy gold but today it's after noon yes and I've already been traumatized by the day, by part of the day. Just being alive. Yeah.

So I'm already like, I've already feel like I got run over. So I, now I, I got an emergency mocha. Oh, and that's mocha with emergency powder. Yeah, sure. I mean, I don't know what they put in there. I told them to load it up. So I got a, it's real bubbly. They said whole milk.

And I took a little while and I said, yeah, I don't know what, there was no thought. They said whole milk, and I took a little while, and I said, yeah. There was no thought process that happened during that part where I took a moment either. They said whole milk, okay, and I thought I kind of did a little bit of theater where I cocked my head. Pretend you were thinking. I didn't think anything about milk, or I tried to. What do you have thought? That's what I thought.

I guess 2% came in my head, and then I think actually my exact thought process was 2%? Fat? And then I said, okay, this hole's fine. Give us all the fat. 98% fat. I'll just sip around it. Yeah. It's okay.

Yeah, I thought chocolate maybe would make me funnier. Were you saying off mic that you had a nervous breakdown last time? Well, last time I was here, yeah. I'm working on my hosting wow way to reveal i had thank you for bringing it up uh yeah i yes i was hospitalized briefly tell me about the worst day of your life no it wasn't though for people who just heard that and think what he means serious it's not he what happened i ate nothing in the morning and i had like a lot of cold brew and i also had not slept very much and i forget what else i did something else the night before that was like but it just hit you whatever i was wiped out and then i had cold cold brew and i was like all fired up telling a story about something about bigfoots that were

injured on mount saint helens or whatever it was and um and then i just my whole brain just went blank i mean like it's happened, my whole brain just went blank. I mean, like it's happened before where your brain just, I don't know if you've ever had it. Maybe it's something that happens when you're over 40, but just like, yeah. I tend to drink coffee until, this is how my day goes. I drink coffee until my body can't take it anymore. And it's like, you're about to die or something. And then I will eat something.

Oh, perfect. So we just caught you at that moment. So like I had a moment where I was like where I was excited to be on the show. I love being on this show. I really get fired up. I want to do my best. And so I'm like, I need to drink cold brew, even though I was feeling kind of fragile from not getting sleep.

And then all of a sudden, things were going good, and I was talking about something real funny. And then Miles was just like, oh, yeah. And then what happened after that? And I was like, ah. You were like, you just said, hold on, I need to eat something. I'm sorry. It took a while, though.

For a minute, I tried to get it back on track, and you were trying to help because- Oh, you're like, I forgot what I said. Yeah, and you were like, don't worry, but what was it? You were just saying this, and then Jack was like, you were just saying this, and it wasn't helping. Then they were like, then it was getting weird, and then I said, I think I need to eat something, which- We did. Then they were like, you know, then it was getting weird. And then I said, I think I need to eat something, which. We did.

My therapist told me to say if that ever happened, if I ever had one of those brain. Wipes. Yeah. They told me I should say I have to eat something. Well, and even if you don't have to. Yeah. They just told me that was a good. Terrible advice.

It was a good out. It is. No, but I did. I ate a bagged egg or egg in a. Bag. Well, I was like, I sometimes buy those eggs from trader joe's that are in a bag which nobody likes if you want to be popular do not do that no because you see it and go wait till this dude opens that thing it's a diet fart that oh it's disgusting it's disgusting but if

you yeah if you want to never have a girlfriend like have a girl come over to your place and see a bag of eggs in your refrigerator i don't care how well you're doing did this man robin nest yeah i don't nobody likes it but anyway i like them because sometimes I just, you got to get something in your belly. It's protein, man. You know, we agree, but then belly full. I was on, Oh no, go ahead. No, no. Finish your piece. Just bistro box. It was, it was an egg in one of those Starbucks. I'm glad we got that detail. Yeah. Yeah. I really, just for the record, because it was real, it was touch and go there until that um before we get into everything let's just talk about what we're getting into in the show uh and we'll check in with uh the long overdue impeachment trial girl i'm talking about

impeaching this creep because we got some updates uh some votes coming out of places we didn't think they would and in addition to some senators uh willing from the right, okay, the GOP, that are willing to check Trump's powers. Oh, wow. It's like they don't want to be involved in an unnecessary war. And some Murdoch drama. Ooh.

With the Ruperts and the Lacklands and the James, the Rupert Murdoch family. There's some, I don't know if it's infighting. It just, it seems like there's one son who believes in science and then the rest don't. Yeah, that checks out. Then we'll check in with Felicity Huffman's daughter because I've been worried about her ever since she was gaslit into thinking she was a genius. Speaking of employment, I hope she's employed now.

Like, I hope she's still employed. What is her profession? Is she an actress? She acts like she goes to college. Excellent. Oh, yeah. So an actress she acts like she goes to college excellent oh yeah so an actress yeah and uh also kanye you know he's been talking about this he's the whole church stuff and he's really fully gone to the evangelical dark side because he's on uh a roster of people at this conference it's dark days and if you're a kanye west fan prepare

yourself because he's no longer with the rock uh he's with a and if you're a kind of west fan prepare yourself because he's no longer with the rock uh he's with a different kind of rock the rock of christ uh and it's wow the cast of characters at this uh conference he's at it's something to uh behold now before we get into that chris yeah what's something from your search history that's revealing about you all right here we go here we go what's? Well, this is the new one. I think I have a funny feeling that you guys might know about this, but maybe not. It's this guy named, I think his name's New England Wildlife and More. Hold on.

It's New England. An emphasis on and more. Yeah, yeah. Well, here's the funny thing about this guy. Yeah, New England Wildlife and More. Now, here's the, and more is mostly what he does. And the and more is he opens old food from the 1960s and 50s and 40s. Like old war rations and stuff?

He does. Or canned food? He does war rations, but he'll just open canned food that he gets from, I don't know where, from like canned food auctions or something. And he opens and sometimes eats. No. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Does he ever eat one and start heaving?

Well, it's kind of weird because I always thought like if you open one of those old cans, like an old can of, say, cream corn from literally, sometimes he'll open one from like the 40s. Right. Like I thought you had to have like a gas mask on. I don't know what, I thought, for some reason I associate botulism with cans, but I don't know if it comes out of the air or what happens. Sure, sure. You know what I mean?

I'm not even thinking that scientifically. In my mind, it's like 70-year-old can, gross. Well, just don't do that. In the 70s, like my mom, like when I was like eight years old, would be like, you don't want a dented can because it's botulism. But I don't know. I never understood why.

But anyway, these cans are not only dented, but they're 60 years old. And he's like, it's swollen. He's like, you can see it's going to hiss. He gets real into whether it's going to hiss or not. He seems to be happy when it hisses, but he's also disgusted. Oh, so he's kind of like, uh-oh, I think we got a live one here. He sniffs it. He will occasionally when it hisses, but he's also disgusted. Oh, so he's kind of like, uh-oh, I think we got a live one here. He sniffs it. He will occasionally taste it, like with his, and then he says, oh, I think that was a mistake

to taste that. And he's like, I think that maybe I should wash my mouth out, because that probably has bacteria in it. And I don't know why. Sometimes he thinks it's okay to taste it. He's like, I think he sniffs it, and he thinks if it's like- Passes the smell test or something? If it smells enough like the product's supposed to, then sometimes he can't resist but to taste it right but um i like how

you go i think and i think you guys might know this channel well it's got and what was his name again new england wildlife and more but it should really be called man who opens old cans and more yeah because and actually exactly that and no more. Yeah, and even if he is out among the wildlife, I'm still thinking he has 1940s cream corn in his belly. So it's really more like man who eats old food is in the wildlife. Dude who does diarrhea in the woods. Yeah, it's not. The channel.

Man who eats old food from food. Is each video sort of like 1956 Campbell's Soup? Yeah. Or does he come upon these cans? You never know the provenance of these cans. He sometimes mentions that he got them from somebody on his street, or sometimes he mentions that he got them from, I don't know. I guess he sometimes just says some guy gave them to him.

He opens like a can, like when people can stuff. Right, right, right. He opens shit from the 40s, and he'll just open it, and he'll be like, he's really intent on, he just goes, oh my God. Oh God, this really stinks. Oh boy. Right. It's like, he's like, I think this used to be cherries.

It's probably cherries. Yeah. It looks like cherries. It looks like probably cherries. And he's like, um, but then he's like, it's like, okay. And then he dumps it in this tray, but it's just like a tray, like a regular tray, but he kind of makes it like a sign scientifically. He's always like, make sure he gets it's like, okay. And then he dumps it in this tray, but it's just like a tray, like a regular tray. But he kind of makes it like scientifically. He's always like, make sure he gets it all out of there.

Like he figures out it's disgusting. And then he's like, it's hard to get out of here. Then he's playing with trash. And then he's like, well, I'm going to have to use the, like, I'm going to have to use a spoon to get it out. But it's like, why do you need to get it out? Like, I know what it is. It's like some kind of spoiled fruit. And then he's like, play with it.

He's like, oh, look at that. Look at that. Yeah. It's kind of. And then sometimes he'll like stick his finger in it and like taste it and then go, oh, I shouldn't have done that. But he does it all the time.

It'd be great the following videos, he's like slowly become more and more gray in the face. He drinks Crystal Light. Well, he looks like he's already, you know. What does he look like? He's kind of like, seems like kind of a backwoods, like kind of a meth. I get a meth-y vibe from him, like a meth-y trailer vibe.

I'm getting that too. And he seems like, so he probably is like maybe used to like, you know, eating. I mean, he just seems like sturdy enough that maybe he can poke his finger in some 1940s cream corn without needing to worry about it that much. That is one of my favorite characteristics I've ever heard someone say about another person. How do they look? Sturdy. Sturdy.

They have their legs underneath them. He's like, I would never. I would never. I don't care how much the product smelled good. I would never. I don't care. He's like, this is Fluffernutter from 1972. Yeah, this one is canned horse meat MRE review.

Okay, that's like a ration. Yeah, a meal ready to eat. I just watched him flush Jell-O down the toilet. And is that how he disposes of all of his foods? He flushes it. He looks at them through a microscope, too. And then he's like, I think that's bacteria, but it might not be bacteria. He's like a trash scientist.

Yeah, because he'll look at the stuff through a microscope and he'll just be like i think that's bacteria but it also could be just part of the food also like that's how it happens i have no science that every time i have no scientific training so honestly i don't know what the every time he's like look at that and he was kind of like grossed out he's like oh god what is that he's like but then it's like oh maybe it could just be part of the food normally but it also could be bacteria but i don't't know. And he does that every time. And then, yeah, sometimes he goes in the woods, I guess, and looks at, he'll do abandoned things sometimes. Sure. It's about the MREs and the canned food, really, is what it sounds like.

What's an MRE? The meal ready to eat. The ration. Oh, okay. Yeah, he does that. The horse meat, for the record, came from Russia, but he wasn't sure if it did. Here's what I like about it. He wasn't informed about it.

I like, when I listen to jazz or classical music, which is supposed to be relaxing, I can't relax. So I like to listen to metal. I'll listen to Cannibal Corpse or something, and I'll relax. Oh, we don't do plugs on here. Oh. Yeah, please.

Dan, cut that Cannibal Corpse plug, please. Although they had a great scene in Ace Ventura. Anyway, I'll listen to Metal to relax. It becomes background noise, or maybe it sounds like an industrial machine going. Like Torch? Yeah, like having a washing machine going in the background or something. That bassist plays a note called the Bomb Note. But I've realized, is that true?

Yeah. It's like a whole other thing. You know a lot about Cannibal Corpse. No, I'm talking about Torch, this other band called Torch. They have a song called Tarpic Carnivore. Is that true? Yeah. It's like a whole other thing. You know a lot about Cannibal Corpse. Dude. No, I'm talking about Torch. This other band called Torch. They have a song called Tarpic Carnivore. Check that out. Wow.

If you want to relax, Chris. That sounds cool. And so I watched this can guy in the background while I'm doing stuff around the house. So it's like a steady hum of this guy being like just cracking open cans. And you got metal blasting. This is going to be a good hiss. He'll be like, this is going to hiss definitely because it's got gas in it, you know, from being in the damn can for so long.

Yeah, it's deteriorating. And then he says, it's going to have gas. Oh, wait. And then he goes, oh, no, it didn't. And then he goes, oh, that one had a good amount of gas. But there's never any, you know, it's just always, there's no information about the gas really. But that was a lot of information about him.

Yeah. He's a cool. And you. He's a cool dude. No, and. But that was a lot of information about him. Yeah. And you. He's a cool dude. Knowing you chilled a medal in YouTube vids. He's got a million fucking hits on these videos. That's the thing. Someone's watching these things besides me. Right.

It's you and your million computers. It might be. What's something that's overrated? Oh, overrated. That's right. I got this written down. Cans that don't have gas in them. Silent cans. A silent can. Oh, overrated. I's right. I got this written down. Cans that don't have gas in them. Silent cans.

A silent can. Oh, overrated. I don't like that one. I was going to say overrated is modern music, but that is dumb. That's fine based on the sounds of old hissing cans and metal don't compare to the likes of Claro. I feel like that guy opening old cans is getting more done than most bands these days because

he's like I just think bands should be talking about something besides vague diary entry type stuff

considering the world's ending I just think most music who's like a popular band right now that you think you said

you I would love to just revamp your lyrics Guns N' Roses I'm a said, I would love to just revamp your lyrics? Guns N' Roses. Well, I'm a musician and I'm still trying to have a career, so I can't actually follow through on this opinion. Oh, got it, got it. Yeah, I can't say anything bad about it. Well, you're a throwback.

You're a throwback. You bring the good things with you. I just think a lot of music is about you know, not much lyrically. It's like very interpersonal relationship stuff and not like sort of like, hey, the corporatocracy is creeping on us

and pretty soon we'll have nothing and the earth is melting. Oh, you haven't heard the latest Arcade Fire song then because they address all that. Oh, they do? Yeah, every single one. I thought they were tired. Oh, you haven't heard the latest Arcade Fire song then? Because they address all that. Oh, they do? Yeah. Great. Every single one. I thought they retired. Oh, they're back, baby. Just for this one song.

Yeah. The flame is brewing again. The earth is melting. But I think it's a lot because rich kids are... Rich kids have always been musicians because... They can afford the stuff. Artists in general tend to be rich. Well, the way our education system works, it's like musical education isn't always readily

available to everyone. So you have to go out of your way almost to seek it. Whereas other countries, they're steeped in musical traditions a bit more. And I grew up kind of like, I'm not like poor. I didn't grow up poor. So I'm not saying that you can't make good music if you're rich. But since the music industry has just been fucked by, there's like so few opportunities now.

Your career, your career. Almost all nepotism. And so like the people that tend to be making music are people who, you know, hang out in like Atwater Village in LA and like just are concerned. Now you're attacking me. Now you're attacking our audience. Yeah. I was just in Atwater Village.

That's why I know who's there. The reason I know who's in Atwater Village. That's why I know who's there. The reason I know who's in Atwater Village is because I was there eating a bowl of like kimchi or some shit. I loved hipster crap. Yeah. I'm guilty of this stuff too. I'm just saying that I wish like considering the Trump people are being fair and the Koch brothers are being very specific with their shit that I think maybe like musicians should dial it

in a little bit and like focus a little and be a little less like just like into the desert. You know what I mean? Everybody's just like, I love the desert. You've been to Joshua Tree? It's like, you have a platform now. It's hard to come by a microphone in this corporate owned landscape of live nation. And now we've you've got your big moment like what do you want to say trust fund kid uh i like the desert oh

great that's great i like the desert what's your take dude have you ever been to cabo right what that's the thing and like on the other hand we got people doing travel bands and shit so i mean i just think music can be, you know... Music is the weapon of the future, as Fela Kuti once said. Yeah, I'm not one of these people at all who's like, musicians need to shut up or artists need to shut up or anything. Artists, anybody who's got a microphone in their hand needs to be talking truth to power,

not talking about how much they love Joshua Tree. That's all. Fantastic. Amen to that. What's something that's underrated? They love Joshua Tree. That's all. Fantastic.

Amen to that. What's something that's underrated? Underrated? Like being nice so your career goes well. There goes that one. And there you have it. We called out Live Nation by name just now. Oh, shit. You're right.

I did. I meant Live Nation. Don't worry. No one listens to the show. Underrated? Oh, I put my own advice column oh yeah yeah my advice column called the advice king is underrated yeah and i've written like 120 of them and they're fucking probably the best stuff i do and some of the meanest like the most recent one is uh all about bro country

the question was what bro country bar should i go to to in Nashville? Cause this is out to let people know, explain a little bit what the advice column is. Cause you do that. It's isn't that out of a Nashville? I used to live in Nashville. I, I, I,

I, I, um, like my band, Chris Crofton and the alcohol stunt band was like a big local band. So I was kind of a local celebrity and then, and then like, yeah,

local God. Yeah. Like if, yeah. If one night stands where you don't come make you a god and they do um um so so i was a god i can't think of any other qualification for being a god end the show on that one oh my god anyway i'm in therapy right now i'm getting into some really real shit. I hear you, man. This mocha is really, oh, fuck.

I like these mocha episodes. That's just mocha talk, baby. Anyway, so you're the talk of the town in Music City. You're backed up. I moved out totally. Oh, yeah. I mean, alcoholics never come. I was an alcoholic.

That's weird. My mom has that bumper sticker. By the time I got secure enough to ask a woman to come home to my house, there was no question that I was so insecure. I had to be so drunk in order to tell a woman I liked her. I couldn't. Anyway, you get the idea. Now it's getting a little too real.

Now it is. Just now. Just now. I liked all the other stuff one second ago good point okay the trail of unsatisfied sexual partners that was cool um i mean no no well sometimes well anyway so so they um i moved to la and i got my friend who wrote for uh uh my friend tracy who wrote for jezebel used to write for the Nashville scene. And she said,

you should do an advice column. Have you ever thought about doing that? Because I bet the Nashville scene would give you one because they have one for like Andrew WK and he has one. And like Henry Rollins has one. And you were kind of like that kind of a person in Nashville. So they'd probably give you one. And she immediately texted the editor of the Nashville scene,

who was a person I knew. And they said, hell yeah. So I have, I've had it ever since, since 2014 when I moved out here. So I've been writing for five years and it's like my favorite thing. Where can you find it? Anywhere.

If you Google The Advice King, I got some videos that I made where I read the columns out loud and then I've just got a billion of them online. So if you Google Chris Croft and The Advice King, you'll find a million of them. And they're some of my favorite things I've ever done because I'm forced to focus and write as opposed to just babbling shit about my sex life. Live nation. Chris, what's a myth? A myth is a-

Just tear a myth down right now. I'm going to tear a myth down. Just tear a myth. Take them all down. A myth. You're not going to like this myth. It's so stupid. Break our brains right now.

The myth is that bald guys don't use shampoo. Huh. I don't use shampoo. Huh. I don't use shampoo. Do you? I use shampoo, and this is why I want to bring it up. Oh, you're side hair? That's what I'm talking about. I want to bring it up.

Maybe I'm insane. Side hair, baby. I might be insane. I might use shampoo for no reason at all. You know what I mean? Just to psychologically make myself feel better. Oh, maybe the shampoo will shame the hair I use a lot of shampoo

you do have hair though like I have a little hair yeah so what would you use like a bar of soap on it or like a hodgepodge exactly thank you very much

that's exactly right right and I feel like it's mean when people say they say oh some people say you save money on shampoo or whatever all the time

like my aunt said that to me when I was home for Christmas well she should mind her own god damn business that's exactly right and i went i went now give me that bar of soap yeah just give me that dove rock i'm so glad you brought a bar of soap because that is so funny because yeah like just because the side hair is not significant doesn't mean it has to be dry right wow doesn't have to be unhealthy or at any unhealthy i cut my hair usually so low that there's not there's like a fraction of an inch of hair that I don't know what shampoo would do to it.

Probably moisturize it. See, I think part of it. Unless I use like coconut oil on my skull. Well, see, you're young. Are you bald? Yeah. For real bald? Well, it'll be vaporized in a few years.

I'm on the trail of tears. Blakeake you have a nice head of hair that's very nice of you to say but it's going and um you're rich in hair i mean if you're rich in hair you're gonna be you're gonna be i'll trade you remember this well this goddamn government's trying you're on insecure comedy talk the podcast oh my god yeah so comedy talk oh man oh no i hair. Nah, bro. I used to have my hand. Hey, you have great bone structure, though. I think this is a great bone structure table. Holy hell, this day's the greatest day of my life. I have great bone structure.

Dude, I bet you cum all the time. Hell yeah. I take back everything else I said that was weird. I have great bone structure. Why am I sad? Right. Why am I not cumming? I have great bone structure. Why am I not coming? I have great bone structure. Why am I not coming? Okay.

The Chris Cofton stroke. Okay. I think that's enough. But yeah, shampoo. Anyway, my aunt just said I was going to the, I didn't even, my aunt's like, I visited her upstate New York. I've not seen her in years. We were never that close, but I love her and she loves me, I think.

But I mean, we just didn't hang a lot. Right. And so I kind of like, I was going, so I went up there and it was her 44th anniversary in AA and it was, it's my eighth this month. Oh, congrats. Thank you. And, um, and, and so I went up there to celebrate and I don't, you're not really supposed to say AA, I guess on, you know, AA, you're not supposed to say AA, but a 12 step program.

Right. You know, it's like, it's a great program anyway. 12-step program. Right. It's a great program. Anyway, I want to say that. It's a great program if you're ever considering quitting drinking. So I was walking down the hall and I said, I'm going to take a shower before we go to the meeting. Right. She's been sober 44 years, by the way, which at this point, it's like you're just going

for the cake. Right. Is that what you get on your 45th? Yeah. Every birthday you get a cake. Right. Is that what you get on your 45th? Yeah, every birthday you get a cake. Right. Is it a good cake? I mean, whatever.

Your group gives you a cake and they give you a medallion. Oh, nice. Yeah, you're just collecting swag at that. Once you're 44 years sober, for goodness sake. Yeah, you're fully- I don't feel like my aunt's about to drink. Right, right. So you're on your way to the meeting.

So I'm just on the way. I said, I'm going to grab a shower. You're going to the shower, yeah. And she goes, don't use too much shampoo oh and i didn't understand what it meant because i've not been bullied in a while yeah jesus and i i've not been bullied in a while so i was like i was like oh okay because i realized it between the oh and the okay you know i was like oh yeah oh like we were asked for milk okay cool can i tell you some shit now yeah oh you know what i mean yeah okay chicken legs you know Between the oh and the okay. I was like, oh, yeah. Oh, like when we were asked for milk? Oh, okay. Cool.

Can I tell you some shit now? Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Okay, chicken legs. You know what I mean? Wow. Right.

She needs to do some squats. I didn't say anything to her. No. Skipping leg day for what? Yeah. 60 years now? Yeah, exactly. What if I went after her right back? Yeah.

I bet you use tons of shampoo, you hairy motherfucker. Wow. See, that's a problem. I think a comedian gets insulted and realizes they might have to clap back. Typically, it'll be a disproportionate response. You get slapped in the face. What the fuck did you just say about me? Oh, my God.

Oh, well, you have herpes. It's like, whoa. And who knows where you got it from? My whole family knows you have herpes. We heard about it when we were like 12. My dad told us. Yeah, and we were told not to say anything or else we wouldn't get Christmas presents. Oops. Oh, sorry. Disproportionate clap back. heard about it we were like 12 my dad told yeah and we were told not to say anything or else we wouldn't get christmas presents so oh just we disproportionately clap welcome to the petty insecure man podcast the best the best heckler line i've ever heard in my life was at a bar in

boston and there was a comedian named tom dustin and someone was heckling him who happened to have a lazy eye and uh was saying, I can't hear you. I can't hear you. And then Tom Dustin goes, what do you hear out of that fucking eye? Oh, shit. The fucking most devastating thing. Real good. I've ever heard.

It was so. That's like the one time where an audience won't get on the comedian for like 100 percent, like literally like committing verbal assault. Yeah. The audience member gave him a slap on the wrist and he like launched a missile at the audience right like it was not that's really good yeah yeah it was crazy a curse on your house all right let's take a quick break and we'll be right back it was december 2019 when the story blew up. In Green Bay, Wisconsin, former Packers star Kabir Bajabiamila caught up in a bizarre situation. KGB explaining what he believes

led to the arrest of his friends at a children's Christmas play. A family man, former NFL player, devout Christian, now cut off from his family and connected to a strange arrest. I am going to share my journey of how I went from Christianity to now a Hebrew Israelite. I got swept up in Kabir's journey, but this was only the beginning. In a story about faith and football, the search for meaning away from the gridiron and the consequences for everyone involved. You mix homesteading with guns and church and then a little bit of the spice of conspiracy theories that we liked.

Voila! You got straight away. I felt like I was living in North Korea, but worse, if that's possible. Listen to Spiraled on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When you think of Mexican culture, you think of avocado, mariachi, delicious cuisine, and of course, lucha libre.

It doesn't get more Mexican than this. Lucha libre is known globally because it is much more than just a sport and much more than just entertainment. Lucha libre is a type of storytelling. It's a dance. It's tradition. It's culture. This is Lucha Libre Behind the Mask, a 12-episode podcast in both English and Spanish about the history and cultural richness of Lucha Libre.

And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, the emperor of Lucha Libre and a WWE superstar. Santos! Santos! Santos Escobar. Join me as we learn more about the history behind this spectacular sport from its inception in the United States to how it became a global symbol of Mexican culture. We'll learn more about some of the most iconic heroes in the ring. This is Lucha Libre Behind the Mask.

Listen to Lucha Libre Behind the Mask as part of My Cultura Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you stream podcasts. I'm Dr. Laurie Santos, host of the Happiness Lab podcast. As the U.S. elections approach, it can feel like we're angrier and more divided than ever. But in a new, hopeful season of my podcast, I'll share what the science really shows, that we're surprisingly more united than most people think. We all know something is wrong in our culture, in our politics, and that we need to do better and that we can do better.

With the help of Stanford psychologist Jamil Zaki. It's really tragic. If cynicism were a pill, it'd be a poison. We'll see that our fellow humans, even those we disagree with, are more generous than we assume. My assumption, my feeling, my hunch is that a lot of us are actually looking for a way to disagree and still be in relationships with each other.

All that on the Happiness Lab. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Fantasy football fans, the NFL season is here, and now is the time to get ready to dominate your leagues. The best way to crush your opponents this season is to listen to the NFL Fantasy Football Podcast. Come hang out with me, Marcus Grant, and my pal Michael F. Florio as we give you all the info you need to absolutely steamroll your fantasy league

and bring home a championship. You don't need to spend hours each day breaking down every stat and every stitch of game tape to set a winning lineup. That's our job. We'll provide all the insights you need to set the best lineups each week. All you need to do is listen to the NFL Fantasy Football Podcast when it drops five times a week. If you're looking for a smart, fun, and entertaining path to dominating your fantasy leagues, then look no further than the show Straight From the Source at NFL Media. Do it before it's too late.

Subscribe now and listen to the NFL Fantasy Football Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. And let's just check in with this whole impeachment thing girl i'm talking about impeaching this creep so the creep has been well look the impeachment is on its way okay uh today if as of this recording uh nancy pelosi should be voting on impeachment managers who will you know guide it through the senate, as well as officially transmitting the two articles to the Senate for that phase.

And I think most of us have looked at what the Senate looks like with Mitch McConnell at the wheel and just thought, you know, fuck it. I don't know. There's probably nothing going to happen. No. Because this old scrote throat won't, you know, he's going to do whatever the fuck he wants over there. But look, good news.

You just came at him like he made a shampoo joke. Yeah, exactly. What, do you fuck out of that throat? Oh my God. We have derailed. Whoops. Oh, I should have known. I'm getting Blake and Chrissy here.

We're in for a ride. So it turns out, our biggest concern, I think most people who have been paying attention, was that he was sponsoring and assigning on to bills that were just basically saying, yeah, we'll dismiss the case before we do. Let's just dismiss it. Let's just not even hear it. What do we say to that? And it turns out there might not be the votes to do that.

So they're having to rethink their plan and actually this dude might not even have the votes to keep witnesses from testifying wow which is a big development because a lot of uh the like the the fuss coming out of uh the senate on the gop side and the white house basically saying like they think that there are at least four republicans probably and likely more uh that will vote with Democrats to call witnesses. And they just need a simple majority. So that's 51 votes. You only need, what, four people to go with you?

I didn't know that. Yeah. So suddenly. That's exciting. Lisa Murkowski, Susan Collins, Mitt Romney, and Cory Gardner of Colorado. Susan Collins, Mitt Romney, and Cory Gardner of Colorado. They also look at Rand Paul and Lamar Alexander from Tennessee as wild cards because they don't quite know those two because they've been being like, I don't like what's going on.

Who knows? Who knows? Who knows? And that's been throwing a huge wrench in the gears. And, I mean, you know, it sounds good but i obviously it's mitch mcconnell so i don't know what the fuck is gonna happen and i think for him he's looking at is like if i took a vote on dismissing it and lost it it's going to look awful yeah for a lot of vulnerable senators who are running that they're like they were basically voting for a full cover-up like no

trial sham just bullshit cover-up um so i think they're recalculating basically voting for a full coverup, like no trial sham, just bullshit coverup. So I think they're recalculating a bit. It's like, okay, well, I don't, I'm not going to take a vote to the floor that I'm going to lose. So it now looks like there will be good possibility of witnesses and not just like the kinds that they were wanting in the house, which are like, well, this, this random father agrees that Trump did not do anything impeachable. Let's ask

him. I don't know why these constitutional law professors. What about this guy, Hank? Like, so again, there could be some witnesses and then they'll probably just acquit. Yeah. Rand Paul's been like ramping up his criticism of Trump lately over the past few weeks, especially since the- The Soleimani? Yeah, yeah. Assassination? Crisis, yes. And so that could be a way for him setting the table

to actually make this vote, or it could just be Rand Paul randomly saying shit, and then he won't. It's hard to know with so many of these Republicans because they've always been crucial votes. At one point, with know, with the Brett Kavanaugh hearing, you thought, oh my god, maybe it's like Susan Collins. It's always Susan Collins.

Susan Collins is the worst. And then she's like, I'm just disturbed. I mean, seriously. It's always the same thing. It's always like, disappointed in the president, disturbed by these actions. Yes, I will vote for whatever he wants me to. Right, right, exactly. But let me just get this soundbite out. But I think, especially for Susan Collins, I mean, the amount of pressure coming out of her state uh for her to like detach herself

from like the umbilical cord of the white house like come on but i'm wondering like what what is made i mean she's already i can't imagine anybody who's evolving their position on susan collins like in maine yeah i have there's some. I'm starting to really think Susan Collins is full of shit. Oh wait she's gonna oh she says she's considering voting for witnesses so maybe she's not full of shit. I mean you know it's funny though too. She's done this so many times.

Over like Jeff Flake. Yeah over like the Christmas and New Year's holiday there were murmurs that oh Susan Collins may come to the light actually and maybe on the witness side and then suddenly he's like oh maybe not maybe not maybe not and i think this is where the tactic in nancy pelosi delaying transmitting it to the senate has created enough space in between for people to digest everything and then really take a look at what's going on the senate be like wait hold on like you're not even trying to do a trial?

And I think that's where people like Lamar Alexander, who they describe as an institutionalist, really believes. I didn't even know he was still in the – I waited on him one time in Nashville. Good guy? Yeah, big tipper. He seems great um i mean he's the same as like i i over my years as a server i've waited on a bunch of orville what not orville renbacher what he is orrin hatch oh oh wow i waited on that guy these guys they're emperors i mean they carry themselves like they've gotten

i mean this guy or Hatch had the softest skin. I mean, his hands were so soft. I shook hands with him. I mean, it's absurd. You thought you were like tripping or something? I mean, they're like baby hands. Like he's never done, he has like, they don't prepare their reports.

They don't do their research. They don't do anything. Yeah, they had a whole staff. They just walk around. He was like perfumed. Like Orrin Hatch smells amazing. Wow. And his marshmallow skin. He was perfumed. Orrin Hatch smells amazing. Wow.

And his marshmallow skin. He had fucking beautiful pedicure. I mean, not pedicure. I didn't see his feet. He had Mickey Mouse hands. Beautifully pedicured, fingernails. He smelled great. Wearing a fucking custom suit. I mean, these guys, same with Lamar Alexander.

They carry themselves like royalty. I mean, Lamar Alexander, he must. I can't believe he's still a senator. I did stand up once with Arlen Specter. What? Yeah. Don't tell anyone. In the audience or?

No, he was on the show like he dropped in. I was this was like 10 years ago. I was in Philly, like still doing open mics. Not anymore. And this and then they're like, hey, someone's dropping in tonight. And I thought it was a big famous comedian. And it was Senator Arlen Specter. Wow. And he wasn't bad.

Like he clearly had writers, you know, like, which is such a bar. But he had good chops like to deliver the jokes? Yeah, because he can speak, you know,

obviously. Right. Like it's what's coming out of his mouth. That's the, that was the issue. But like, yeah, he was,

he wasn't bad. So yeah, Google, Google Arlen Specter stand-up comedy if you want to get depressed. More depressed. I love when people like Lamar Alexander dust off their principles.

Well, we've yet to see, though. Right, right, right. I believe it when I look at the roll call vote and I see where the yay's and the fucking nay's are. I can't believe this. I thought that the only person who was going to vote for witnesses was Mitt Romney. It was the last I heard.

And then he even was waffling. So it seems like maybe now they're feeling a bit of the pressure. And there's even a little bit more pushback too because now they're, you know, Tim Kaine has a bill to rein in the ability of the president

to basically just unilaterally conduct military strikes around the world without you know checking in with congress yeah and so tim kaine has a bill that now he thinks there are probably about 10 republican senators who are going to vote with democrats on this especially like mike lee i think he's been the most vocal about it ever since that sham briefing that happened and he was like he came out like pissed he was real And he was like, he came out like pissed. He was real mad. He was like, I've never, like, what? Did you see the Fox News cutaway on that? No.

Well, I saw it on, I listened to, watched Sam Seder a lot. You know that show? Yeah, yeah. Majority Report. I like that show a lot. But those guys, you know, show clips and things. And they showed the clip of Fox News

where they were doing a live, like they were showing the Senator's reactions live. And so they thought it was safe to show Mike Lee because he was a Republican and he was in the middle of this, like really, you know, impassioned and unusual comment. And they just cut away in the middle and they're like,

so they're just giving their comments now. Oh, of course. Yeah. I mean, they really, yeah. Who's that guy in the control room who has like the,

who knows? Yeah. And it was like, you know, yeah. Like, I mean, they really... He's making it hot. Who's that guy in the control room who has, like, the who knows? Yeah. And it was like, not only did they cut away, yeah, like, the guy got in the earpiece, like, we're cutting. But also that he just was like, oh, yeah, just another... Like, the guy was, like, yelling into the camera, and he's like, well, we're just getting our regular reactions for the briefing. That's not what's happening. He was saying this was a fucking fucking Just a tragedy of a fucking briefing With no answers

They're like They've got these people trained They don't give a fuck Another normal comment from Mike Lee He's like screaming and spitting on the camera That's what a happy person looks like He's like oh yeah he's loving the president But he

When he did give that He was careful to not directly attack the president. He's like, I love the president. OK, this briefing trashed, though, because, again, they still they can't bite the hand that feeds. And when you look sort of at what Mike Lee said, he's like, it's not unreasonable that there might be a group of 10 who should be considered potential candidates to vote for it. And he said this resolution is completely non-controversial. There's no reason no one should be opposed to this. It's about reasserting the Constitution declared that the Congress has the sole power to declare wars. That's it. We believe in that,

right? We keep talking about the Constitution, but is that it? Yeah, Matt Gaetz, apparently Trump's main lapdog. He ran afoul. He's got his constituency in Florida is largely military. He's got a lot of military bases in his district. So he was forced to come out in favor of that. And he must have hated it because Trump is apparently. One of the comms people out of the White House were like, the quote was, I'm not joking, super uncool of him to do that. Oh, my God.

So they apparently aren't talking to him. I mean, he's really had a consequence for, I mean, which he totally deserves. It's just mean girl shit, but like with millions of lives at stake. Of course. Don't sit with us at lunch. Okay. That was really uncool. So, again, if that passes the Senate, it would go to the House, and then Trump would veto it.

Great. And that's how it works. Now, I just want to talk about the Murdoch family because obviously in Australia, the fires have been just devastating. I think 27 people have passed away, and they suspect almost something like one billion animals. Yeah, it was like half a million last week. almost something like one billion animals. Yeah, it was like half a million like last week. And then the countless destruction of homes and just the destruction of fires.

It's a tragic, tragic scene. And what happened was there was a quote that came out from Rupert Murdoch's son, James. Is he the one who shit his pants on that HBO show? Oh, one of them shit their pants? Yeah. I know Lackland he's Lackland's younger brother so was it Lackland or James oh it was a succession joke but go on oh no that's on me that's not your fault wait who shit himself on uh in the show Kendall did he right yeah he shit his bed oh that's right spoiler alert it's a major oh god

we should have warned people about succession spoilers. I know. God damn it. The whole plot of the whole show. You know what's sad? Everything is so coming, like bleeding into each other that I don't know a succession joke from real life. Yeah.

Yeah. And it's actually reasonable. And I don't know how to make one, apparently. And Mr. Guy watches some guy open old food all day falls silent. Yeah. You're like, ugh. Mr. Canned some guy open old food all day falls silent. Yeah, you're like, ugh. Mr. Canned Goods over there. Your version of prestige television is getting violently ill. There's a guy eating old horse meat out of a can.

So anyway, so, you know, the Murdochs, they run Fox News, and also in Australia, where he's from, he has over 140 newspapers, has like 3,000 journalists working for him. And they've done a great job of basically denying climate change has anything to do with these fires. And this is where James Murdoch, his own son, was like, dude, what the fuck is this? He's like, I guess through a spokesperson gave this quote that Catherine and James views

on climate are well established and their frustration with some of the News Corp and Fox coverage of the topic is also well known. They're particularly disappointed in the ongoing denial among the news outlets in Australia, given obvious evidence to the contrary. I mean, that's a very reasonable statement just in general, because I think anyone who doesn't think they know more than scientists will say, yes, I believe that climate change is occurring. And most people can witness it with their own eyes, especially with this fire. But some of the quotes in this Daily Beast article they were pulling when the fires were burning like back in November, one of the columnists in Australia for a News Corp-owned publication said, quote, One of the columnists in Australia for a News Corp-owned publication said, quote, hysterical efforts to blame the fires on climate change continue, even though we have always faced this threat and always will. Now, by hysterical, do they mean like, you know, fear mongering and like scared or do they mean hilarious? I don't know.

It's hard to know when people are climate change deniers. It's equally as insulting. Yeah, 100 percent. The next day in the Herald Sun, let's assume you're silly enough to think global warming is causing worse bushfires around the world. In fact, a recent NASA study found that the area burned by fire has dropped 24% over 18 years. True, the world has warmed slightly as it rebounds from the little ice age that stretched from 1300 to around 1870. But can we cool it on this panic? In that time of warming, life expectancy has shot up, world grain crops have set new new records and the death rate from extreme weather has been slashed by 99 who said that that's from another fox owned thing of basically pivoting off of that's that's a little that's like the subtle version where it's like yeah like i get the fires burning but it's like but really are we doing that bad considering these stats that are completely disconnected? I mean, also talk about the advances in technology that those stats don't go up because climate change isn't real. But again, this is the logic that's applied. And then there was someone who went on Ingram, Laura Ingram show the Ingram angle on just a few weeks ago. And this guy was like,

they just arrested 12 people in Australia for those fires and they were blaming it on climate change. Wrong again. Then he added, this is incomplete reporting, Laura, though Australia has had the highest temperatures on record, the driest season ever. It's not correct to say climate change caused these wildfires. Now, I don't know if they're splitting hairs to say that climate change created the spark that literally set the fires, but most people are talking about the conditions in which the fires are like exacerbated, which is created out of climate change. But this is sort of, I don't know, it's, you know, this happens obviously on our news too, because you have an entire media apparatus that's invested in keeping the status quo.

But it was interesting to see a bit of a fracture in the Murdoch family. Yeah. But I guess given like how devastating the destruction is, I can't imagine being Australian and having someone trying to, you know, force feed you this bullshit climate change and I'll be like, yeah, OK, that that works for me. And it's just not the right time to do it. You know, like it's like when we had the fires out here and Trump was attacking, you know, like the firefighters and like, you know, or I'm sorry, the ones in Northern California. It's just listen, if you even if you have this awfully incorrect opinion based on no fact whatsoever, just keep it to yourself until people are safe again, you know, and then maybe while

people are trying to heal. But that's how all these outrage take people work. It's like you've got to throw in the most provocative take when people are at their most upset about something. Well, that's an interesting point because they have no problem politicizing a tragedy. And then when it's a gun thing, they say, how dare you talk about... When it's any issue that's not... On the other side, they're say, how dare you talk about, when it's any issue that's

not, that's not, you know, on the other side, they're like, you can't talk about the, how are you doing? That's why there's no, like, it's such a disingenuous approach to it. It's insane. You can't take someone seriously when they, there's no, you know, terra firma that we can both agree we are standing on. Bullies, this is, I was thinking. Bullies always... Bullies always get made fun of for their baldness.

No, wait a minute, huh? I just know that bullies' main thing is acting like any... They always act like they're not worried. That's their main move. The main move of a bully is that everyone else is neurotic and they're relaxed as a way to get laid oh you mean like the gaslighty version yeah i'm chilled that's what they're doing like i don't care whole fox news model is just like high school bullies like they laugh at

liberals because that makes them look like they'd like for the time being that will get them laid because a mate will like to be with them because they make they they don't believe in global warming and that makes their mate feel like less likely to be affected by global warming yeah right it's like i love it when i'm with jesse waters from water's world because right now global warming is still survivable and then she gets to be like or he whoever going that's also what earth is going to be called laura ingraham's boyfriend. Laura Ingraham's boyfriend. Ingraham? Yeah, I like that. Ingraham Lincoln.

Gets to lay on her chest in bed. And you know that's the way it goes. Like, he lays on her chest. And he says, tell me again how climate change isn't real. Yeah, brush stroke my hair. Mommy? Yeah, like, mommy, tell me. And she's like, climate change isn't real?

Are you kidding me? You'll be safe with me forever. Or she goes, are you fucking idiot? Dinesh D'Souza? Climate change is real, you dumb fuck. Oh, little Dinesh. D'Souza? She dated Dinesh D'Souza climate change is real a little Dinesh D'Souza she dated Dinesh D'Souza I mean they did yes holy hell that literally a match made in hell so anyway I it's just a it's a it's funny that the bully it works until you know until like Jesse Waters is dragged off the set by a squid but until then they will be just saying like what me worry i mean that's the whole gig

for a bully and like for a rich person and they feel safer too which which informs their opinion like they're feeling safe like they don't feel any they have air conditioning everywhere they go and if you even if you entertain that idea it's probably too frightening which is why i think there's a certain appeal of thinking like that is like well if it's not real to me i can just keep operating in a way that i don't have to live with this existential dread that other people have and most people have it and i can make fun of people who who express their dread for being worry warts and that the sky is for henny penny the sky is falling was a classic bully line from rumsfeld during the iraq war like i mean just shit that's like that's straight out of eighth grade.

Yeah. Like, ooh, Henny Penny, The Sky's Falling. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, God, why does that make me mad? Because it's diminishing. It's like you have a point to make, and they just go like, ha, ha, look at the person freaking out. And then they get friends because those people are like, I want to be with the guy who says everything's going to be okay. Not the guy who's like, think about what is going to happen.

Not with Chris Crofton, that guy who's always worrying. But I'm not taking any of this shit personally. No, no. Everything for me comes back to my high school story. And let me explain to you. Yeah. Penny Penny was my bully. Yeah.

All right. We're going to take a quick break and we'll be right back. When you think of Mexican culture, you think of avocado, mariachi, delicious cuisine, and of course, lucha libre. It doesn't get more Mexican than this. Lucha libre is known globally

because it is much more than just a sport and much more than just entertainment. Lucha Libre is a type of storytelling. It's a dance. It's tradition. It's culture. This is Lucha Libre Behind the Mask, a 12-episode podcast in both English and Spanish about the history and cultural richness of Lucha Libre. And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, the emperor of Lucha Libre and a WWE superstar.

Santos! Santos! Join me as we learn more about the history behind this spectacular sport from its inception in the United States to how it became

a global symbol of Mexican culture. We'll learn more about some of the most iconic heroes in the ring. This is Lucha Libre Behind the Mask. Listen to Lucha Libre Behind the Mask as part of

My Cultura Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you stream podcasts. It was December 2019 when the story blew up. In Green Bay, Wisconsin, former Packers star Kabir Bajabiamila caught up in a bizarre situation. KGB explaining what he believes led to the arrest of his friends at a children's Christmas play. A family man, former NFL player, devout Christian, now cut off from his family and connected to a strange arrest. I am going to share my journey of how I went from Christianity to now a Hebrew Israelite. I got swept up in Kabir's journey, but this was only the beginning. In a story about faith and football, the search for meaning away from the gridiron

and the consequences for everyone involved. You mix homesteading with guns and church and a little bit of the spice of conspiracy theories that we liked. Voila! You got straight away. I felt like I was living in North Korea, but worse, if that's possible. Listen to Spiraled on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Laurie Santos, host of the Happiness Lab podcast. As the U.S. elections approach, it can feel like we're angrier and more divided than ever.

But in a new, hopeful season of my podcast, I'll share what the science really shows. That we're surprisingly more united than most people think. We all know something is wrong in our culture, in our politics, and that we need to do better and that we can do better. With the help of Stanford psychologist Jamil Zaki. It's really tragic. If cynicism were a pill, it'd be a poison. We'll see that our fellow humans, even those we disagree with, are more generous than we assume. My assumption, my feeling, my hunch is that a lot of us are actually looking for a way to disagree and still be in relationships with each other. All that on the Happiness Lab. Listen on the iHeartRadio app,

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And I just, you know, we were talking about some heavy stuff. And I just do want to take this moment to quickly breathe a sigh of relief for Felicity Huffman and william h macy's daughter sophia macy uh because it was real we were really we didn't know what was going to go on will she get into college will she have the resources to survive on this earth with two acclaimed actors for parents and it turns out she will be okay because she's just booked a role on season two of Jordan Peele's Twilight Zone. Oh, thank God. Okay. Oh, thank fucking God.

Which is funny because she is in an episode called Among the Untrodden. So I'm curious to know what that means. Hmm. Well, she's been troddened upon. I know. She's downtrodden. She is the downtrodden. She is.

She is. So, I mean. Well, you got gotta love to see people when they get work and she booked she booked is that a digital series oh no no well i mean what is isn't it on cbs digital or something or showtime cbs digital by the way is just vhs it's their version of a digital channel wow between live nation and the cbs digs none of y'all interested oh these bridges are burning baby yeah related news i went to a cattle call audition for a ford commercial congratulations oh nothing happened oh damn it there i was treated they were mean

mean were they hitting you literally cattle products mean they're just mean like get in your get in your corner the other older white guys. Is the Ford cattle call a Ford door? Asian women this way. Yeah. Yeah, it was not for a car call, the cattle call. The Ford cattle call. Okay. Oh, wait. That's like, what's her name?

The other one, not Felicity Huffman, but the one. Lori Loughlin. Lori Loughlin. Yeah, you guys probably talked about it already. Oh, yeah. Learning judo for the. See, that ended up being a fake story. Oh, bummer.

Damn it. Because that... I mean, that story... That doesn't mean it's not true. That story presupposes a wealthy white person of means thinks they're going to go to jail. Yeah, that's true. It's a false premise. I knew it was a joke from the start.

Yeah. Anyway, moving on. Kanye West. Heard of him? Yeah. Quick survey. What's he Kanye West. Heard of him? Yeah. Quick survey. What's he up to? Heard of Kanye, Blake?

That's a hard yes. Chris? I've heard of Kanye West, yes. Okay, good. Got to make sure we're all on the same page. Right. He is slated to be at some evangelical event called Awaken 2020 at the Sun Devil Stadium in Phoenix, Arizona.

Oh, fuck yeah. And I mean, it's an interesting assortment of evangelicals with all kinds of interesting beliefs. I knew, obviously, with Joel Osteen embracing Kanye, there's clearly evangelicals were warming to him. Yeah. But I didn't realize that they quite literally believe that he will spark the new great awakening. Do you think that Kanye is trolling everybody? I don't know. What a move. At this point, it's going too deep.

Like, the troll has, like, if you're going to troll, you're doing it wrong. Now you're in the rom-com where you're like, I know I said I'm an evangelical, but it started as a troll, but now I really do love you. Like, I feel like the joke, the prank part, it's too late now. Yeah. I really don't. I don't know what is, I don't care to understand what he's thinking, but I will take him to believe, or I will believe that what he's putting out there about this whole, like, I don't give a fuck, I'm MAGA, fine. If that's you, that's fine. Then, you know, there's plenty of trash people out there.

I think it's cold brew related. Wow. Oh, it has to be. Okay. No, talk that talk. What do you think? Just that he might be having too much cold brew. Oh, not enough food.

Not enough eggs. Yeah, you have enough cold brew. You go through a brain wipe, you end up at a damn evangelical conference. The Arizona State Stadium. The Sun Devil Stadium. You say you're wearing a robe and you say, what the hell happened? I mean, so this whole thing, the people he's appealing with, I just want to sort of underline, right? Because if you do think like, oh, man, he's just like about, you know, religion or whatever and freeing people.

The ideologies of some of these people has nothing to do with freedom and has everything to do with oppression. One person, Guillermo Maldonado, his church recently hosted the president at a campaign kickoff for evangelicals for Trump. And he has said that God raised up Trump as part of his end times plans for America. That's one guy. Okay. There's another person named Che Ahn

is a promoter of seven mountains dominionism, which teaches that Satan has had control of many of the mountains of influence in society, like government, media, entertainment, et cetera. And that the right kind of Christians need to gain control over them. And has said that if Christians are in charge of the mountain of government,

they can make decrees and declarations and can influence the whole mountain. And also rabid. And you can also assume every person is a rabid anti LGBTQ. make decrees and declarations and can influence the whole mountain. And also, you can also assume every person is a rabid anti-LGBTQ person. Oh, yeah. That goes without saying. Lou Engel has used his prayer events to call for an end to abortion in America, to mobilize resistance to LGBTQ equality, and to ask God to, quote, remove pro-choice Supreme Court justices so that President Donald Trump can replace them with justices who will eliminate the right to abortion. That's pretty standard, actually, for evangelicals.

So are these like keynote speakers? Yeah, these are all the people who are like, and speaking, Kanye West, Lou Engle, Cheyenne, and the prophet, literally this prophet, Cindy Jacobs, who has told a gathering that God wants Christians to become so wealthy, it will make Jews jealous, sparking a, quote, it will make Jews jealous. Sparking a, quote,

great harvest of Jewish conversions. That's the other kind of thinkers that are on this fucking panel. Who books this, by the way? What's their email? I think Live Nation. Okay, cool. It'll be airing on CBS Digital. Got him.

Yeah, and then in 2018, she said, oh, this will really get you. There's a reason God brought so many Asians to California. The Lord told us that it was like a hidden weapon. The Asians were like a hidden weapon that God wanted to use to turn the elections. Who said that? The same, this prophet, Cindy Jacobs. Oh, this prophet.

Jesus. So, I mean, my goodness. That's when I'm like, oh. Because I think, again, if Kanye doesn't know what he's doing, then he's being manipulated to just be like, yeah, go here, go here, go here. And he's thinking fine. Or he has no nuance to his thinking that Christian right will take over the country thanks to everyone like with Kanye co-signing this kind of theology. Or I don't know. It's just very odd. Or he does know who these people are and that's how he really does think.

is like one of those things where when if if this is if he's not doing this on purpose you know like if this is some sort of accidental thing he's stumbling to when does he have his awakening and it literally should be when you look at the people standing around you when you you look at their bios that you just read i mean obviously they probably you know hide a few of these things they wouldn't say it in the exact same way you just know that's how right actually maybe they would no maybe that would be actually word for word, their bio on their brochure. And you're looking around, you're like, oh, fuck, is this a company I'm keeping right now? You know what I mean?

Because there's going to be nobody like Kanye there. Yeah, who's he going to relate to or anything like that? That's why- And how are they going to treat him, too? I think there must be something wrong with him. There must be like, he must be having one of these manic episodes. Yeah. I mean, they said that-

It's a manic season. I mean, that seems like some kind of... Either he's trolling or it's some kind of mental breakdown. Because as... I just don't understand how he could... Because just to have a conversation, one conversation at a conference like that would be so awkward. Kanye is very smart.

These people are not smart. I think also... But it's also your ego and your narcissism right because if you suddenly you say one dumb thing and you don't want to say sorry then that will kind of begin to create a magnetism to another group of people that's true and they're welcoming and that's why trump used to be a goddamn democrat right exactly until he was like we don't like this and he goes then then at that point your ego is just in survival mode is like well where are the likes at i'll go where's the applause yeah it makes sense, we don't like this. And he goes, Ben, at that point, your ego is just in survival mode. I was like, well, where are the likes at?

I'll go where the strokes are. Yeah, it makes sense. And I don't give a fuck. And actually, that's where you really reveal. It's like, no, my end game is just to have my ego stroked. Yeah. That's it. I think the thing that makes me maddest is, I mean,

that whole idea that Pompeo apparently and Barr both are religious nuts who all think that there's going to be some final conflict and all their foreign policies being run by these Christian zealots who actually think like a war in the Middle East is necessary and all these crazy things to get Jesus to come back. and i can't i mean that's just blows my mind because well because every fucking generation wants the world to end during their time so they can get a special performance right you know i mean like oh i want the armageddon i want the armageddon i want it during my time alive it's the most childish it is some shit like why would we get the answers why would we be oh yeah all we need to do is install a fucking idiot as president and then we have a war over here and then we get the answers? Why would we be? Oh, yeah. All we need to do is install a fucking idiot as president, and then we have a war over here, and then we get to find out why we're alive. Yeah. That's the dumbest, most childish.

But that shows you. And the fact that live nation. I think you're talking about Mike Pence, not William Barr. No, William Barr apparently is a major. He's also in the end times theology. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay.

Because, yeah, they really love to see it. He's one of these Opus Dei guys. Do you know what Opus Dei is? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The truth is out there, man. Okay, do you know what it is? Yeah, yeah.

It's just that group of fundamentalist Catholics or whatever. Sure. Barr is one of them. And Pompeo is too. I love that Pompeo thinks Pompeo's going to get raptured to heaven. That greasy, like that oily pig man Pompeo's going to get raptured to heaven that greasy like that oily pig man is going to go to heaven

I doubt it he looks like he's going to go down a slide straight to uh oh H-E double hockey sticks I can't stand Mike Pompeo it's not nice to call he's not a holy man look at him

none of these people are. Yeah, they're crazy. They're a bunch of misfits. All these people have completely abandoned any kind of empathy or sympathy. Steve Mnuchin and his fucking horrible Cruella de Vil woman he's married to. But that photo of her holding up the sheet of money, those black leather gloves, I'm like... They think they're going to get...

They want Jesus to come back? They're out of their minds. Jesus is going to stomp a mud hole in their ass. Fuck yeah. Whoa! Hell yeah. That's right. Let them know. One night only. Jesus stomping a butthole in that ass. I mean, seriously. Mike Pompeo thinks Jesus is going to be psyched to meet

him? But you know what's funny? Imagine if Jesus comes down and he's like, yeah, what's up y'all? Y'all really did my will. Welcome to the club. The rest of you guys are fucking evil. What? Where is pompeo first order of business yeah i need i need to come see him okay y'all they need my body yeah okay all right just making sure and what about all my blood what about all the people who came before christ like before ad oh bad timing all those people before that they don't get any no narrative for people to come save them or anything.

Your parents should have fucked later. They couldn't have started a war. Even if they started a war, there was no one to come back and show up and have a party. They tried. Yeah. What if we get the- I bet the people who were really close within a few centuries of Christianity fully becoming a religion, those people were like, yo, it's probably due now to come back probably.

Yeah. And I feel bad for them. Everybody dies looking at their watch waiting for him to come back. Yeah. Okay. I just want to also bring up another thing because Blake, you're from Philadelphia, right?

Am I saying that right? Yes. F-I. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like Philadelphia. I like Philadelphia. Excellent. Am I saying that right? Yes. F-I. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like Philadelphia. I like Philadelphia. Excellent.

Did you know Philadelphia cream cheese is not from Philly? That's not funny. Okay. That's not funny. I know. Why would you say this? I'm sorry. I should have known this. We can edit this out, right?

No, we won't. What are you talking about? He's trying to get Jesus to come back by starting this. Bon appetit. Jesus is on his way. You keep talking like this. An editor at Bon Appetit looked into- That old rag?

Yeah, that old rag. Spun this old yarn. Wait till you get a load of this. Fine. So what happened was the Philadelphia brand, okay, dates back to the late 1800s. But this is when dairies in Pennsylvania, at the time, they were getting in the dairy scene. They were making their name out there because they had this soft, creamy cheese made with whole milk.

Okay. Back to you, Chris, this all ties back to you. Now, now, now it's whole milk, whole milk,

two percent, your mocha. Good. Keep that in your mind. Yes. Then in New York, they were making a version with skim milk and I was too chalky. And they were like,

God damn it. This other shit from Philly is really good. Idiots in that city. Exactly. Look, hey, you said, hey, I don't want that smoke. That's all from this Philly fan over there. But then this one New Yorker named William Lawrence, old Bill Lawrence, my drama teacher from high school, literally his name, started selling his own cream cheese, but it was made from skim milk with lard mixed in to make it more rich to mimic the other one.

And he called it Philadelphia, hoping that the Pennsylvania Association, like with the name, would be like, oh, he's got that Philly cream cheese. Yeah, he's a hack. Yep. That's what happened. And then he even trademarked the words Philadelphia and Pennsylvania in conjunction with the products. It worked and it sold. And that's where we are now.

Oh, cool. Well, sounds like you put a sicko's product on your bagels. Good. Good for you. A fucking conscious list. Yeah, you got any bad news about Philly cheesesteaks now? No, no, no, no. Yeah, because if you want to bring down my whole existence, go right ahead.

I mean, do you, how do you, what's better? Is Nick Foles not real too? What are you trying to do to me? What's, are you Geno's or Pat's? It's tough. Gen genos um i believe tastes better but the guy uh well actually the guy who originally owned it is a big fat racist and oh really his son keeps the signs up yeah it says like order in english it's very um oh yeah it's not great but um what i do is i uh go with a mandarin yeah is i order in mandarin yeah and

they and they know my order by now. I wink at them a bunch of times, and they get it that I'm one of them. But I'll go to Philadelphia, two major cheesesteak places. By the way, this is a 45-minute story. No, go ahead. Yeah, two seconds. And they're right next to each other, and I will get one cheesesteak from one place, one from another. And then my friend and I, whichever we like the most,

we'll split one from the last place. Oh, you do splitsies. Yeah. So we'll have two and – oh, my God. Is it two and a half? Is that what you're going to have to do? That's what we do. Yeah.

Yeah. Or no, one and a half, right? Yes. You eat one full, one from – One, one. Oh, wait, no. You eat one full, and then you go back to double down? It's two and a half.

Two and a half men. Two and a half sandwiches. Two and a half sandwiches. The Blake Wexler Philly cheesesteak story. You get it with Wiz? Wiz with? Wiz without. Wiz without. But that's controversial.

I lived on North Broad Street for six months in 1992 when my friends were going to Tyler School of Art. Yeah, art. Yeah, yeah. And I went to McGlinchey's. They had nickel drafts. Still there. Nickel drafts.

How? I don't know, but we drank them. This was during Reconstruction? Then we listened to Nirvana, and then we- Oh, Nirvana. They had to reconstruct Philadelphia. Yeah, 1992. 1992 was like free hot dogs and nickel drafts.

See? Promised land. Grunge promised land. Yeah, seriously. When America was great, huh? Oh, my God. Is that what they're talking about? Is that what they want to bring back?

That's the subtext. McGlinchey's nickel drafts. Can you even drink nickel drafts without being canceled? Yeah. Get this man a fucking Senate pen. Can you eat an all-beef hot dog without being canceled in this country? Oh, I'm the bad guy now. Yeah.

Just because I like beef? You probably can't even say all beef anymore. I bet you can't say 100% beef without getting canceled. Jesus Christ. It's an outrage.

I tell you what. This country used to be all about nickel drafts. Nickel drafts and nickelback. Ketchup? That sounds like a lot of work. And men expressing themselves. Men who have drank

nickel drafts expressing themselves. Does a man who drinks nickelbacks or nickel drafts nickelbacks? Yeah. That who drinks nickelbacks or nickel drafts, nickelbacks. Yeah. That's where you do a pickleback listening to nickelback. Yes. A nickelback.

It'll fuck you up. If you drink a nickel draft, do you think you're expressing yourself that much or you kind of do that to help you compartmentalize? It's just a way to, it's a way that the only thing you're going to express at the end of that is, is where do we get Coke? That's it. That's what nickel drafts are a lead into. Boom. Gateway drug

into a bunch of laxatives cut. You drink enough nickel drafts, you're going to hit a dead end eventually. And then you're going to say, hmm, what are we going to do now? Dope man! Well, Chris, on that note. Someone get the dope man on the hard line.

It's 1992. On the hard line, yeah. Yeah, on that one. It's 1992. On the hard line, yeah. Yeah, beepers and shit. Dude, he knows his payphone number. He'll know. He'll know. Just type in the number from the payphone in there. He'll know. Chris, thanks so much for coming by.

So fun to be here. Thank you, guys. Where can people find you, follow you? You can find me on the old Instagram at Chris underscore Crofton, and you can follow me on Twitter at The Crofton Show. Hey. And then you can read my Advice King column and you can listen to my

Pitchfork approved debut album, Hello It's Me on all the streaming things and you can also buy one if you want somehow. And you can go see me tomorrow night in Palm Springs opening for Neil Hamburger at the Ace Hotel.

That's awesome. That's going to be a great show. It should be pretty fun. That's Thursday or Wednesday? That's tomorrow or Wednesday. Oh, today. Yeah. Okay.

So why say that again? It doesn't matter. No one's going to Palm Springs. Well, just say it. You never know. There's people who live out there. All right. Hello, Zite people.

Zite gang out in Palm Springs. You got a show tonight? Tonight in Palm Springs at the Ace Hotel. And then I'm staying over at the Ace Hotel. Swanky. Yeah. Everybody can come up to my room and watch Curse of Oak Island. Oh, yeah.

Curse of Oak Island. Now, that's a fucking tease. And some New England wildlife. And more. Oh, and we can watch some guy open old cans of food on my Chromebook. Boom. I mean, that sounds like a five-star date to me. And by the way, the speakers on a Chromebook really let that hiss out.

You can hear that. It's like the old tannoy. Oh, get ready for it to hiss. It didn't hiss. Is there a tweet that you like that you want to call out? Oh, yeah. I retweeted the Rialto Report, which is a golden age of porn blog. The Rialto Report is a golden age of porn blog?

I was going to put it on my list. It's wonderful. Oh, my God. It's like interviews with all porn stars from the 70s and 80s, but they also have digitized whole issues of Adult Cinema magazine from 1982. of adult cinema, um, magazine, uh, from 1982.

They've someone in the world is digitizing whole, uh, porn mags from 1982. Uh, and the Rialto report is where you can find them. And that's a tweet. I like just knowing that there's this one central repository. I just can't believe someone's doing that.

Like someone's digitizing old porn mags. You could say it's a porn hub. Yes, you could. R could say it's a porn hub. Yes, you could. Rialto report's amazing. Cause that's, that's a whole different, that's a subject.

NSFW. Don't look at that on your work computer. No, don't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Rialto report. Get on a VPN, put it on private, put a private, private browser window on and look in the dark. Do not go anywhere near the Rialto report near anyone you love. Oh, wow wow great endorsement

uh Blake yes DJ Daniel from the booth was like you're not gonna talk about gyms Philly cheesesteaks some gym erasure I was like is that a band oh gym erasure the thing is I'm mixing stuff up is gyms good yeah yeah I want to get the full street I mean there's

Alessandro's and Roxburgh's. Everybody has their place, and everyone fights each other over it. Then who's your place that you fight for? Who's your champion? I just want to get this out of the way. I like Gino's. Not publicly, but yeah. Wow. Off the record. Wow. Well, that was

on the record, son. Sorry. The mic's rolling. I actually want to have a show called On the Record. Great. Has that been done yet? I don't know, know man but i'll put that in the good ideas file thank you uh blake thank you for helping me today thank you thank you for saying i helped yeah thanks whenever you're here you know jack's not away we can get real wacky in here you know like a couple thank you um Thank you. What was I going to ask? What's your Twitter?

Where can people find you, follow you? Oh my God. At Blake Wexler. I'll be in Pittsburgh February 27th, headlining Arcade Comedy Theater. Every Sunday I host a show at Verdugo Bar in Glassville Park. Oh yeah. Which Chris, you should do it sometime.

Okay. And then if anyone else wants to get booked on it, let me know. They got the tacos out back? Every Sunday. Yeah, sometimes they do. Okay. And then if anyone else wants to get booked on it, let me know. They got the tacos out back? Every Sunday. Yeah, sometimes they do. Yeah. Great bar.

And yeah, at Blake Wexler, BlakeWexler.com, all that shit. They do picklebacks there too, don't they? If you ask, yes. If you ask. And then they go, what is this, 2012? And then they'll give it to you. And they give it to you for $2012. $2012.

That's steep. It's worth it though. But when Nickelback comes on, I got to do a pickleback. Do you think it otherwise, man? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Couldn't make's steep. It's worth it, though. But when Nickelback comes on, I got to do Pickleback. You know the wise man? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Couldn't make it out of poor man's stealing. Tired of living like a...

No, hold on. Tired of living like a blind man. Sick of what's happening without the sense of feeling. And this is how you remind me. Crack-a-coo-ca-coo-x. That's that drum fill. Crack-a-coo-ca-coo-x. Yeah.

A little open hi-hat there. Now, that's a band. If you can't sing drum fills, bro, do you even listen to music? Thank you. Cracka-kss. That's that drum fill. Cracka-kuk-kak-kss. Yeah. A little open hi-hat there. Now, that's a band. If you can't sing drum fills, bro, do you even listen to music? Thank you. Is there a tweet you like? Yes. Comedian Chip Chantry, at Chip Chantry.

It was like a news story. Vince Vaughn and Donald Trump spotted shaking hands at a national championship game, and then Chip tweeted, how is this this headline not wedding crasher caught orange handed really good yes really good at chip chantry oh chip chantry that's a good name great name great comedian where is he from philadelphia oh really yeah and still is from there what do you mean like it doesn't come to la and he's like yeah i'm from la right hasn't switched his uh area code uh oh that's how you know yeah uh also uh i guess me now you want to play some music you want to plug some shit what's your handle man you want you want the handles bro is it just uh your name or is it something more clever look if you want the handles meet me at rucker park okay because this crossover have you hold twist it up like a backwoods now if you want my

handles on social media at miles of gray on twitter and instagram uh let's see also my other podcast for 20 day fiance with sophie alexander check that out comes out actually on today's on wednesdays so go download that if you want to keep hearing my voice except much higher and talking all kinds of wild shit about reality tv now tweet i like quick. A little bit of shade from the Zeit gang. Genevieve at TotallyNotAFish Sounds like a fish. quote retweeted me a Reductress tweet. And look, I love Reductress,

but this is where it hurts. And, you know, Chris, you can relate. It says, it's a picture of a guy in an Elvis wig. You know, we've all seen this, this bad costume Elvis. It says, how to make your thin hair look thicker by wearing this $6 Elvis wig from Party City.

So stupid. But I will try that. And if, oh, and then one more from Anna Hosnier handing me a phone right now from Reductress. It says, white friend who got lip filler

seconds away from saying something problematic. Wow. Wow. Truth. Also, y'all, check out, you know, we got some live shows coming up. Okay? So look into those. We will have, if you look at my Twitter, you'll see some links.

I think you'll see them on the Daily Zeitgeist page as well. Portland, Brooklyn, D.C., Minneapolis, Chicago, Toronto, we're coming for you. And yes, there will be more dates too, so don't worry cities like Boston. You know, you're asking around. I'm sure Colorado, we're going to have to hit you up. Texas too. Don't worry. will be more dates too, so don't worry cities like Boston. You know, you're asking around. I'm sure Colorado, we're going to have to hit you up. Texas too. Don't worry.

This is just the beginning, baby. Yeah. Okay. If you're bald, don't wear a wig. It'll drive you nuts. Thank you. I know a guy who started wearing a wig. He lost his hair and started wearing a full-on wig. Oh my God.

And now no one can touch his head and he lives alone in the woods. Wow. I mean, it's like... Like it was like Tobias and... It's just it ruined his life. He went completely crazy. I mean, everyone thinks he has long hair, but he can't be with anybody. Long hair, I do care.

He can't be near anybody. Wow. Do not isolate yourself. That should be some kind of like Greek myth. I mean, it's serious. The man who wore the wig. Yeah, if someone touches your wig and they don't know you're wearing a wig, you're in danger of murdering that person.

Wow. I mean, you lose it. Yeah. So he has to be by himself. What's his face? There's also this, the guy who used to drum for Bill Withers also wears a wig to this day. He had a really bad after wig.

Back in the day, people really wore them. Yeah. My mom thinks everybody still does. She's always like, you might need a wig. Well, on TV now, everyone wears a wig. So that's just true. Not because they're bald. Just because it's easier to keep the hairstyles consistent.

Just a little fast. A little movie magic. I wish I'd get on a show so someone would put a bunch of wigs on. I'm serious. You can find us. I would love that. You can find us at Daily Zeitgeist on Twitter, at The Daily Zeitgeist on Instagram.

We have a Facebook fan page. And also, The Daily Zeitgeist is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get them, shows free. We also have a website, www.dailyzeitgeist.com, where we post our episodes and our footnotes. Footnotes. Thank you very much, Blake.

We can find all kinds of info, links to the things we talked about, as well as the song we write out on. I want to go out on a song called Johannesburg from Africa Express. And it's got like a, you know, I don't know. It just makes me feel like a cool guy who was like a KCRW DJ in 1999. Is that not who you are? Oh, fuck. Sorry.

Sorry you had to find out this way. And I want to thank Miles and Blake and Anna and Dan. And it's always so fun to be on here. Thanks, Chris. Thanks for being here. And this has been KCRW Morning Becomes Effective. Thank you so much for joining us. We'll be back tomorrow morning.

I'm Nick Hawford. All right, see you tomorrow. Bye. Actually, no, see you later. In like a couple hours. Bye. Johannesburg Anomaly says That she wants to be the future That she can't control until Johannesburg In 1982, Atari players had one game on their minds, Sword Quest. Because the company had promised $150,000 in prizes to four finalists.

But the prizes disappeared, leading to one of the biggest controversies in 80s pop culture. I'm Jamie Loftus. Join me this spring for The Legend of Sword Quest. We'll follow the quest for lost treasure across four decades. Listen to The Legend of Swordquest on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, fam, I'm Simone Boyce. I'm Danielle Robay. And we're the hosts of The Bright Side, the podcast from Hello Sunshine that's guaranteed to light up your day. Check out our recent episode with Grammy award-winning rapper Eve on motherhood and the music industry. No, it's a great, amazing, beautiful thing.

There's moms in all industries, very high stress industries that have kids all across this world. Why can't it be music as well? Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist

who on October 16th, 2017 was assassinated. Crooks everywhere unearthed the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks. She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were

turning her beloved country into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere starting September 25th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Kay hasn't heard from her sister in seven years. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. What was that? That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.

Can Kay trust her sister, or is history repeating itself? There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. They're just dreams.