The Daily Zeitgeist - Weekly Zeitgeist 413 (Best of 1/5/26-1/9/26)

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

The weekly round-up of the best moments from DZ's season 420 (1/5/26-1/9/26)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Hello, the internet, and welcome to this episode of the weekly zeitgeist. These are some of our favorite segments from this week, all edited together into one nonstop infotainment, laugh stravaganza. Uh, yeah. So without further ado, here is the weekly zeitgeist. Miles, we're still to be joined in our third seat by a very funny comedian, actor, writer, improviser, one of our favorite guests. His podcast is rebrand.

He's got a very funny special called Spircially Filthy up on YouTube. He just pulled jammed into the Zoom. It's more. Burr! Let's have you beautiful geniuses. I've started referring to my wife as part of the zeit gang, and she's like, I don't think, I mean, I don't hate the shit at all. Well, you like me? I kind of

I have other fandoms I like to acknowledge first probably Yeah you're not number one Yeah I tried to vary it up From nose grind With a with a With pole jam

I like a pole jam Yeah it's both Yeah it sounds both like Very sexually suggestive And also powerful It's a yeah On a what's called a Philly bar Because those came out of Philadelphia

Because people would They would back their cars Into the bars to slant them So people could 50 up off them and stuff. That's what you did to just get into the Zoom. Yeah, that's how I get into my office. It looked awesome.

More it is, of course, our skateboarding correspondent, our special skateboarding correspondent. Yep. Skateboarding pastor. Hey, kids. Have you heard the good news? Yeah. Watch this. Jesus inspired kickflip.

Oh, man. What do you think the skateboarding pastor would think of, like, the Christ Air move? They would love it. You think they would do that, or would they call something else? We don't want to say it. So we call it a savior grab. Oh. I feel like they're pretty good with just invoking Christ at anything, comparing anything.

Maybe. You know, they're desperate for Christianity's to be cool. So they're like, Jesus is a lot like Tupac. You're like, I don't think. Right, right, right. I was at a white elephant and we got like a Jesus plushy that you could either put in the freezer or in a microwave as like a heating pad. And it's like very comedic.

And we brought it back and the Geist Child saw it and thought like, was like, oh, it's a toy for me. And I'm like, what the fuck am I going to say about this shit? So we call it Jesse. I'm like, oh, that's Jesse. He's like, that's a Jesse doll. And he's like, oh, Jesse doll. And then we were at another place and he saw Jesus somewhere.

He's like, it's Jesse. I'm like, yeah, there's Jesse everywhere. I love that as a nickname. Jesse is all over, man. You know, you're not saying your name. You know there were times. Yeah, Jesse is cool. It's a lot of pressure being me.

Can we just go by Jesse? Call me or Jess, dude. The G-Man. Yeah. How like sort of realistic looking as this dog? Is it kind of cartoony or is it like cartoonish? It looks like the buddy Christ from dogma. You know what I'm basically?

Where the stigmata go, it's little hearts. Aw. On the palms. Like so there, it has like a red sash. It's very cartooning. That's like in that Simpsons episode when Homer, he's on acid or something and he's shaving and he cuts his face but a rainbow spouts out of it. Oh, yeah. Instead of blood, it's just hard?

Well, something for research history. That's revealing about who you are. Revealing. Okay. You watch 90-day fiancé, Miles. I watch a lot of reality as well. I was looking up, I'm watching Real Housewives of Potomac. I looked up Angel Massey.

She's one of the new housewives. There is nothing about her online. Really? I can't find how old she is. They were like, I can't find anything. She's married to a former NFL player. And I can't find. Yeah, I can't find any details about her.

And I'm like, I just did a quick search yesterday. And I'm like, but she's on a reality TV show. It said she was like a journalist for it. I'm like, is that a different person? And like, so now I'm on this like, I need to like hunt down information about this person who I'm emotionally invested in and wondering like why she acts the way she does. Um, you said she's a journalist? It's like a quick Google search claimed that, but that I couldn't find anything about it.

Producer reporter for BET and BET.com hosts. She's spearheaded content ideation. I found her damn website. What? She lets it. It's called the angelera.com. But I can't find like any, like a lot of things confirming. Oh, well, according to her, she's a ball in and ass producer.

Okay. And she also said she didn't get evicted. So we don't trust that bitch. Okay. Is that a plot on the show? That is a blog one. Also, she catfishes. So that's not what she looked.

That is not what she looks like. Okay, shout out of catfish. Anyways. She catfishes the whole show? You know, on the show, it looks like if you look at pictures of her, that was a whole thing. She got called a catfish and she got told she was evict. Like, she picked up and left and had to move back to Colorado really quickly. So everybody was like, oh my God, you got evicted.

And she was like, don't you dare say that. But like, she definitely got evicted. Like, something happened, you know? Right. And her catfish thing, like they looked in an Instagram picture of her. None of our Instagram pictures of her look like how she looks like in real life. And so I feel kind of bad. I feel like she has like dysmorphia or something.

Like because she's filtered. Those filters. Man, the filters can really do some. Yeah. Hey, dude, she went to her favorite song. The Far Side running. Okay. All right.

Someone folks with Jay Dilla. Okay. But I do kind of, she and her husband are like Colorado outdoors people. Oh, she has the own. symbol. Oh, so that is the person. Yeah, that is the person. So she has, Angel Massey, founder and guide. Yeah, they have like a big outdoorsy luxury tour thing. And I'm like, I kind of want to like, I want to go with my girlfriends. I want to, like, visit all the different, like, real. I want to go to beauty bar in Salt Lake. I want to like go to the

different like reality show. I'm like, I want to visit their business and see just how much of scamming. Yeah. She's just, she's doing. She's doing. She needs. She's doing. She needs. Yolku, which is like a Japanese bat? No, she's super into everything. Been to Japan once, gang. What is something you think is underrated? Something I think is underrated. Okay, this is going to be divisive, but somehow I absolutely was under a rock when the movie House of Gucci came out.

Because I just kind of like vaguely remember people being like, Jared Lotto and Lady Gaga are very bad in this and the Italian accents are crazy and whatever. I vaguely remembered it. And so last night, we put it on because it's free on peacock. And I had the best, I had the best time of my life. Samahia plays a witch. Lady Gaga's eyes do a lot of acting. I didn't know the history of the Gucci family. So when it turned to murder, I was surprised.

I was, I had a great time. And I was like, I can't believe. I mean, listen, it's a shitty movie, but shitty fun. Like, we need more fun. It's a fun movie. Yeah, yeah. I don't think that's divisive. I felt like that was the take I heard.

I haven't seen it either, but I remember when Super Producer Anna Hosnii saw it. She was like, guys, it's so out there and awful that it's amazing. Okay, but Anne and I have the same taste. I feel like that's right. But I feel like the culture was like, ooh, we spit on this as cinema. Like, it's really Scott. So they were just like, what a failure. We're embarrassed.

We're embarrassed. Oh, yeah. And that is as good as Jared Lito's Italian accent. That is me doing an impression of his. No, let me do Jared Leto doing Italian, I am embarrassed. That's Jared Lotto's voice in House of Gucci, if you haven't seen it.

I couldn't hear that at all for some reason. You couldn't? It wasn't like too high, like only a dog could have heard it. Yeah, I think only dogs just started barking. Let me lower register. It's he's embarrassedo. Yeah.

It is. He's like, hold on, you're pregnant? In Spanish? Yeah. Which, by the way, that is, Miles. You should break that down, that basically the idea of I have an embarrassment is how you say I'm pregnant in some other languages, which explains a lot of patriarchy. Wow. Yeah, yeah, for sure. I have an embarrassment. That's crazy. I never realized this. I'm not translating that well. I'm kind of giving me the overall idea of it. It seems like the only research he did for the role was like 90s era Mario, Super Mario. Like that accent? Like he's really just doing. a Mario. But I think what's crazy is that he's known for going so method that when he's playing

the Joker or whatever, he's like, I sent condoms full of my own blood, do all my cast meets, blah, blah, and so it's like, wait, what does you do to become a cartoon character in the house of Gucci? Maybe that's what that guy was really like, you know? We don't know. No, I looked him up. Impossible. I mean, I looked at him up as like, they're not even visually doing the same guy. Right. Did you see the Elvis movie, by the way, and Tom Hanks's performance as As Lerman, yeah.

As Colonel Tom Parker. Yeah. Oh, the Dutch guy. Do you ever see an actual interview with Tom Parker? No. He, like, has a southern accent. Like, Tom Hanks just made him be like, I am the snowman. I would snow you over.

Yeah, because he was like so Dutch with it because the guy was a Dutch dude. He was, but like he was a con man who didn't tell anyone. one he was Dutch. That was the whole point. So, like, the movie is even, like, structurally, it makes sense for him to be Southern. And then, like, at the end, you find out he's Dutch Potomax. I don't know how it happened. That's so strange.

It's such a great reveal. It's such a good reveal. So weird. Also, maybe around the same time, just a weird over-the-top, insane film. Andrew, anything from research history? Is this sort of a search history underrated, overrated, malange? We kind of, I mean, I think, listen, people either get it. Anything else you have to say up top?

Search history was, I just got a new humidifier, and I was writing humidifier, looking for ways, how you're supposed to clean a humidifier. Either under or over, whichever is the opposite of the one I already did, was I made a shitload of shrimp cocktail over the holiday season. And, like, really doing shrimp cocktail is so insanely difficult. It involves like making, like a deshelling the shrimp. I made like a wine, lemon, shrimp stock herb broth. Chill that all the way down.

Then you put the shrimp, which you have been dry brining with salt and baking soda out. You poach that to exactly 150 degrees. Then you take that out. Chill that immediately. Serve with some old bay. I made my own cocktail sauce too from like a raw horseradish root. Yeah, I like cooking. But when you said dry brining,

with flour and salt. I was like, no. Baking soda. The other thing is, so, so, yeah,

my, I got walked in in the kitchen, individually temping shrimp one at a time with my, with my probe thermometer, at which point I realized I had a problem. Yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah. That's also, I've never had shrimp cocktail that tastes as good as what, what it sounds like yours tastes.

Like my, my, the shrimp cocktail I've ever had just tastes like shrimp. Yeah. Doesn't seem like anything was done to, here's the thing. prepare it.

It tasted good, but did it taste 1,000 times the work good? And the answer, I'm afraid, was probably no. Okay. Okay. It was so much ever. Overrated. Is any sort of. I guess.

Yeah. Overrated is, overrated is underestimating shrimp cocktail. Not. Preparation. But a good horseradish that just comes through, there's really nothing, nothing like that experience when the horse radish just blows through your signs. I blew my fucking, I took the top off the blender and I pepper sprayed myself literally. I grated some fresh horseradish for a thing I made over the holidays.

And dash, it was like cutting onions. I was like, God. Damn. It was my first time I'm doing it like buying, you know, shredding the root up myself. Yeah. Yeah. And the root. Can't tell if it was worth it.

Anyways, very good. Does it sound like we're trying to avoid the heavy news of the day? I know. I'm sorry. Let's talk more about humidifier. What's that thing? about the shrimp though you put that in a burbrass dang dude old bay

like the chips and stuff oh okay I'll say humidifiers like turn on you you leave like they're there to like help your you know breathing health health and then they it's so easy for them like I've looked inside humidifiers

and it's just like holy shit it's just immediately an entire civilization has grown in there yeah you have to clean that shit like every other day Anyway, I used to sealed water. That's been helping us. Yeah, because then it doesn't get all the songs on that.

What are we doing? Let's just get to the white supremacy shit already. All right, let's take a quick break. We'll come back. We're back. And we got to figure out now that it's been a clean changeover. And the trouble administration came in an illegally kidnapped leader of Venezuela and his wife for good measure. No outcry.

flawless. Flawless, no notes. People are like, so you clearly have a successor lined up, yes, sir? Yeah, right? You thought about this. Who will it be? What are we hearing? What do we hear?

I mean, the loudest voice is Marco Rubio, but then people are like, he's kind of got his hands full with like all the regime change shit happening. So maybe we'll kick it down to Teenage Mutant Ninja Gerbils himself, Stephen Miller, who seems to love to be the puppet master of human life. Very charismatic, so good choice of a leader for a democratically elected position. But even then, that's not even a thing that they can even really get behind. It sounds the most actual, the most sort of consistent reporting you here is that they don't know what they're doing at all.

So they basically, look, Jack, the dog caught the car. again. Mm-hmm. And there is no real strategy post-Modoro kidnapping. They're just telling me that the decision he made because he thought that the guy dancing was annoying wasn't fully thought through. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. They just, and now just to say things like, well, now we're going to run it, but Maduro's

allies are still empowered. They aren't bowing to Trump. So what do you mean by quote unquote run a country, like remotely? How do you do any of this? It's just a sentiment. You know what I mean? You're just like, you know? He's making the guy.

We run it now because that's how easy it works. It's like playing football manager. You just signed with a new club now. And now I run that one. It's that easy. Yeah, you like, you sit in an office and you're kind of mean to people on the phone. That's how you run. Yeah.

Right. But no mention of how. Diet Coke. Yeah. Right. But again, for the complexity of an entire government, they're just saying we run it. And then like the, you know, most of the media is like, oh, okay. So then we're going to run it.

But here's the thing. One person that absolutely will not. not be running tings is Nobel Peace Prize winner Maria Karina Machado. So despite her streak of imperial bootlicking, you know, like she's always, oh my God, the U.S. is great. Israel can do nothing wrong, please. Like everything was fine. I love it.

She did not impress Trump. And I wonder why, you know, because she's down. She said she's clearly down to do whatever the U.S. wants. But wait, it couldn't be the Nobel Peace Prize. She won the Nobel Peace Prize, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the one that he was like kind of kind of had his eye on.

Yeah, he was really into. Trump has said about her, quote, it'd be very tough for her to be the leader saying that she doesn't have the support or the respect within the country. This article goes on from the Washington Post, quote, Two people close to the White House said that president's lack of interest in boosting Machado, despite her recent efforts to flatter Trump,

stem from her decision to accept the Nobel Peace Prize, an award the president has openly coveted. Although Machado ultimately said she was dedicating the award to Trump, Her acceptance of the prize. That's what I know. Yeah, yeah. Her acceptance of the prize was, quote, an ultimate sin, said one of the people, quote, if she had turned it down and said, I can't accept it because it's Donald Trump's,

she'd be the president of Venezuela today. Oh, you could have been president of this mockery of a regime change. That's being reported in the Washington Post, who are like basically captured. Like, they knew about the attack before. Well, yeah. If you think, do you think that he. thinks that he misheard it and he thinks it's the Nobel beef prize and it's you get like 30 big Macs maybe like why that's a really good question more yeah you know Nobel feast prize I'm

just trying to figure out why he wants it right right right he doesn't get him to heaven yeah there is dude he's he's knock knock knock knocking on here and he is absolutely I mean the amount of like mortality topics that pop into his mind is definitely he's been fundraising office stuff like that. He's like, please get me to happen. And now, and you're like, what the fuck? So weird. It's very, he's going to build a golden elevator from the, from the White House. What's wild is like this Washington Post like article where this comes from, it just says,

U.S. plan to quote run Venezuela cloud clouded in confusion. Yeah, no shit, obviously. But like that line about Machado comes like so deep in the article when that's, that really illustrates how this entire the president's weird worldview. due to his senility, which is like, you know, people say I'm jealous, but my kink is karma, is how La Cappell Rohn said it. And I agree. Like, that's how he's, that's how he's overseeing the overthrow of a government and regime change based on like his hurt ego. And that is, like, again, this is more, more and more evidence how unsurious and how just God awful this whole

thing is. Just, yeah. Yeah. It seems like she won the award for being such a good handpicked successor for a CIA coup. Like she was the head of the opposition party who was like got got a lot of votes and it just seems like and his dedicated the award to Donald Trump. That shit is wild. I did not realize how pathetic

the ass kisser the ass kisserry was. Yeah. And when the like Faustian bargain doesn't work, that's got to feel a million times worse. I know. Yeah, would you go, would you prostrate and humiliate yourself in front of everybody? And they're still like, no, you don't get it. I actually don't like her anymore. Yeah, she's not cool.

Yeah. You know, I want to say two things. This is affecting real people, you know. And I just think that's important to remember. And also Stephen Miller looks like E.T. if he was pale. Yeah. He does. Oh.

Like E.T. mixed with Voldemort, I feel like. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. Be great. Send him off on a little, little vacation, a little trance. a little trip down there to just, I don't know. Just be the governor, as they used to call it in that era of colonization,

to be the governor of Venezuela or whatever the fuck. He's got a good head on the show. Of like Arco Chevronville or whatever they want to rename it. It's just like, wow, because then along with that, right, it's on its surface, in illegal kidnapping of a nation's leader on the weirdest, like, it's actually like narco arms charges or bringing them up. This is a law enforcement action. That's like because that's how they're trying to find the sort of like legal framework to make this all work.

We we get all this like manufactured consent because everyone's like this is sounds absolutely just off the rails. What are you talking about? So intro, please come in. Benny Johnson. My man. Dude, the man who when they had to do the federal siege of DC and everyone's like, why the fuck? Why would you come here for any of this? He gave us obviously this great bit of.

My infant nearly died in a drug fire after mass shootings. That's why the government has to come in here. My infant. Mine. My infant. Now, don't fact check any of that because it will crumble under just the slightest bit of interest or investigation. This is his new thing now because I guess obviously this is so illegal and so unpopular. And Trump basically was like coming out being like, no more wars.

We've got to stop wasting money on this crap. It seems like this will be unpopular. with his base. Yeah, well, most are kind of falling in line, sort of expectedly. But Benny Johnson, I think he's really going for it because he's trying to connect Venezuela to another popular MAGA grievance, which is the 2020 election. Ladies and gentlemen, Smartmatic and Dominion voting systems, were the voting systems being used at this time and in these states.

And all around the world, they are Venezuelan by design. Well, cut. I'm sorry, they're to Maduro. They're Venezuelan by design. Okay. Huh? Go on.

By systems and storage facilities and through their actual technology, these systems I have on extremely good authority. Can and do rig elections around the world. Oh. Now, how does this lead us to the arrest of Nicholas Maduro? Yes. Nicholas Maduro knows where all the bodies are buried. Venezuela is effectively just a proxy state that was being run by Russia and China and Iran.

They were running operations here against America using, yes, the election rigging technology, also using chemical warfare, this in the form of fentanyl, and biological warfare in the form of flooding our nation with third world criminal aliens. He was going to say shit hole. Mm-hmm. She's a third world. So, again, just, I don't know if you remember. There were lawsuits. He was pretty airtight, Miles. That one of the designers, one of the designers of the voting machine was from Venezuela.

It's Venezuelan in design and technology. It's inextricably Venezuelan all around. But I'm sorry, he knows or the bodies are buried. So we're actually, we're arresting him because of his involvement in election ringing because that'd be interesting. But also, the Venezuela rigged the 2020 election and then sat out the 2024. election when the person who would be rigging it. So they rigged the one when Trump was in office. Uh-huh. So that's, I always have trouble with their version of things where there is a vast conspiracy by the most powerful people in the country while they're in power. Yeah.

And I'm shocked. I never heard this. You'd think Trump would be talking about this if he knew that Venezuela was behind the 2020 election ring. I feel like we would have heard this age is coming. Miles, the storm is coming. Okay. Jesus Christ. He can't divulge everything.

Yeah. Yeah. This is 44 DHS. We're looking at it. Yeah, truly, truly, truly. So, yeah, right now, they are really firing on all cylinders to try and get people to be like,

to completely lose their critical thinking skills and be like, what? This is bad. This sounds like a total reversal on policy that you said what happened. Although that's, he's in his entire administration is that kind of thing. But, you know, I mean, we should never be surprised when they attach through just bizarre imagination and leaps of logic attached the worst things in the world to brown people. That's it. It's the same fucking play over and over.

And you know, you know, biological warfare when like brown people move here, you're like, what? My white infant son. And like, dude, also the fact, using the word infant to describe your own. child is no, who's like my human son. It's very weird. Oh, it's definitely a modifier to try and make it more extreme. My infant nearly die. Yeah, yeah.

Infant son. So bizarre, dude. Darling, bring the infant in. Nobody's ever referred to their own child as an infant. And where's the infant? I'd like to apply affection to our son. Yeah. My infant nearly

die. Where's my infant? You may back my infant. Also, Usually they don't refer to it as a drug fire because more, that's not a thing. Nah, not really a thing that's ever been. I mean, I guess it is like, I mean, a meth lab caught fire. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But drug fire, meth lab explosion, drug fire. Infant sun, drug fire. You got to put the, it's the little modifiers that give a little bit more sauce. And it's, and it's, and it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's uptex is always, you see why I'm a victim here. You get it. Poor, you know, Venezuela's been so hard on us. Oh. We've been so victimized by Venezuela.

Oh, yeah. It's so wild how powerful they were and we didn't even realize it. Yeah. Crazy, right? We'll get to that part because Krasinski was trying to warn us. He's been warning us. Yeah. All those knowing looks he was shooting at us during the office as Jim.

Yeah. He was trying to tell us something about that as well. Zoomed on his eyes. Pam spelled backwards map. What is Venezuela on a map? Map. Thank you. Yep.

He's always after Pam. He's always after. After Pam. Sounds like my grandfather describing the plot of the office. That jam's always after Pam, huh? I guess. Always after. All right.

Well, we do, of course, want to check in with the health of Donald Trump. That was the story over the break. Yeah. That people continue to speculate about, you know,

how's he doing? Speculate. What's that going on with his hand there? Look. Why can he seem to, move right. Why he keep falling asleep.

He is, why is he keep, why does he keep having to go to the hospital and get full batteries of medical tests like every couple weeks? Hell yeah, dude. Because he's so strong. They're trying to figure out

how is he so powerful. They get a test. Why do they give him cognitive exams like that he's acing? Every time he brushes his teeth. Twice a day. They're hitting him.

Hitting him with the, is your brain still working a cognitive test? And his explanation that he's created for himself is that they're giving it because they've never seen anyone do so good. That's so sad. Anyways, these are all, this is all hater shit. Okay? This is all hater shit about his health. He's beating the accusations with a little R&R and a little maverick advice from his advisors. This is from an article in The Guardian.

Trump said he acted on the advice of his staff to slow his pace, including spending roughly two weeks at Mar-a-Lago, aka the Winter White House, over Christmas and New Year. They have also counseled him to try to keep his eyes open during public events. What? So he can listen to bullshit? He's thinking he's formulating. He's using his incredible cognitive conception.

If somebody brings that up again, they're fired. I'm fucking think, I'm cooking. I'm in the lab. Yes, I'm in the fucking lab when my eyes are closed. But this is like from a Wall Street Journal interview about his health where he just is like, yeah, they've been, they let me take two weeks off, which was really nice. He sounds like Josh Saskin writing home and big. They're really nice to me here. They let me take two weeks off.

Yeah. They also told me to try. try to keep my eyes open during public events. Like that doesn't reflect poorly on your ability to just like be awake. Another tip they said look more, look more vital is what they said. That looks, that's a good one.

Be more spry. Yeah. Just being counseled to try to keep your eyes open is so funny. Like counseled rather than being like, dude, keep your fucking eyes. I mean, no one's talking to him like that.

But I imagine, you got to keep your fucking eyes open out there, dude. Yeah, I'm fucking serious, man. This whole thing's going to come apart. Okay, you've got to keep your fucking eyes over. Eyes open. Eyes open. Eyes open.

Eyes open. You're going to do 20 fifth amendment. Eyes open. They love to blame people rising to positions of power on DEI or whatever. And like the reality is this is how easy it is for this dude to become president of the laugh. They're like, hey man, can you just stay awake, please? He's like, I don't think so, actually. Well, because you think about it, they need the vessel of Donald Trump to be able to like,

magawash and get the support of people because Trump says it's happening. The second Trump is no longer saying what these things are and it becomes another leader, that's when shit's going to begin to wobble because he still commands enough attention to be like, we need him. Look, because like I've said before, he's like the elderly, like the kid who lives with his elderly grandpa who you go over to their house because you can get away with doing whatever because he's up in his room watching TV all day and you can lie to his face. What are you guys doing?

Oh, we're just building a car. Oh, okay. You're building a meth lab. Okay. And yeah, this helps for like, it's like Dave. You know what I mean? Where they're like, we got to have the vessel present to get all this other stuff done, except it's not a comedy.

They have to be looking into a Dave situation. They have to be looking to see if they can get somebody who looks enough like Donald Trump, who is 71 and like still has their wits about them. Dude, they're probably going to. ship in a beloved mega actor John Voight with a wig. Yeah. People would believe they're like,

but Voight is so good as Trump, people will buy it. They're like, but they know it's John Voight. Just fucking try it, man. Transformation. We've got our backs to the wall. He's also and this is giving a lot of people concerns, we'll call them. Because we're all

just want to make sure he's healthy and strong boy. People are concerned about this revelation. that he's taking way more aspirin than his doctors won him to. So this is, this was always something that I found kind of interesting is that like, he's probably abusing Adderall. But for most of the 80s and 90s,

he was just like abusing Sudafed. Like he was taking over the counter Sudafed as his speed. Oh, just for the like a Fedron? Yeah. Yeah. Just to like use that as a speed allegedly. but there's pretty good reporting that suggests that he has been poppin pseudopheds as like his way of like instead of like cocaine or any pep pills. He's like, you know how Elvis was like, I don't do street drugs, but I take like all the prescription.

Yeah. So like suitcases, hockey bags of prescription medication. It was formulated in a German lab. It's not a drug. I feel like Trump is like one step further where he's like, well, they wouldn't be able to sell it. over the counter if it wasn't safe. And so in keeping with how he treats Sudafet, he, he's taking so much asphrine because he's like, I want my blood to be like water. He said, quote, I want, quote, I want nice thin blood pouring through my heart. I want nice, thin blood. I mean, he doesn't listen to fucking anybody.

So it is kind of, we'll say, concerning to hear that he. He is that way with doctors as well. Yeah. And in his defense, he is in such terrible shape that his blood hurts. So, yeah. Oh, oh. My blood hurts. Make it smoother.

It's too thick. It's too thick. Thin it out. This is also, this is from CNN just talking about generally the use of aspirin. Quote, aspirin used to be widely prescribed as a preventative for cardiovascular disease, but that is shifted. In 2019,

medical experts advised against routine aspirin use unless a person has a heart condition or other health risk, citing the heightened. risk of internal bleeding. When they do recommend... I can't see it. Thin blood pouring all over the inside of my body. Yeah. When they do recommend preventative aspirin, doctors typically advise an 81 milligram dose. Trump told the journal that he takes 325 milligram 305 milligrams dose. About four times as much.

Okay. This is from another doctor talking about the use of aspirin, quote, typically speaking, we do not recommend the full dose aspirin. The full dose aspirin has a lot more risk factors associated with it. And for the most part, those are GI risk factors. People who take full dose aspirin are more prone to having GI bleeding, especially if they have ulcers and things like that. And so internal bleeding would be associated with like easy bruising, right? Which is what we're kind of seeing with his hand,

like all the stuff where he's having to like wear loads of makeup on random spots on his hand, where he's like just shook through. people's hands today and damn it if my hands aren't covered in bruises. But then remember if you over the break it switched to his left hand. Yeah. And people are like, so what is it now? Is it Uchi Wally or is it one mic?

Is it these handshakes or are you, is it the circulation is diet? Yeah. I don't know. Couldn't be circulation. I've got the thinnest blood in Washington, D.C. Yeah. It's like tap water. My shit is thinner than Peak Kate Moss, fam.

Oh, he must love. Kate Moss. They call that heroin she. Up to a certain age. She was, yeah. All right. That is a while.

Wait, why are you saying that people were like doctors were wildly speculating on the internet? Like there's, there are people who have like created a cottage industry of being like, I'm a doctor. This is what his health is looking like.

I have not checked their medical credentials. Sure. There is one who is suddenly gaining a lot of attention. Who's like, motherfucker's got three months tops. he's looks bad showing all the signs

that he's on his last legs I just man our next icon has me researching a lot about like death conspiracies and like when people

react poorly to somebody's death and I can't imagine what is going to happen when he finally passes on like with his followers

they're not going to believe like he could like slip and fall off a building in front of everybody while saying, whoops, into a microphone. Whoops, it's me. And there would be so many conspiracy theories before he hit the fucking ground. You know, like, it's wild.

So any way, like, vague. W-H-O-O-P-S, White House, oppression. Yeah, there's a whole thing. We got to. He was trying to tell us. He was trying to tell us. They created conspiracy theories when they didn't kill him, when the shot missed.

Right, right. Anyways, let's take a quick break and we'll be right back. And we're back. We're back. And the story, so Wired got the files on that RFK Jr. dead bear investigation. And it did, but like it's kind of, we know all the beats. He scavenged a dead bear from the side of the road to eat it, then went out with friends before remembering he had to catch a flight. Wait, he was going to eat that?

He was planning to take it to his big meat freezer at his house and eat the bear. He's like, he came. He drove up upon somebody who had just hit a one-year-old baby bear and who was like, I don't know what to do. And he was like, wait, you're not going to, you're going to waste all that bear meat through to the back of his car, drove into a dinner that he was having in Manhattan, I guess. Yeah, yeah. And then was planning to take it back to his house.

and then realized that he had a flight to catch and didn't have time to drop it off at his house. And so then went to, this is the part that has always stuck in my brain, and I hadn't really put it together until this wired article was like, wait, this doesn't make any fucking sense. Then drove out of his way to Central Park

and, like, staged a weird, like, bike accident that had killed the bear in Central Park. before then driving to this flight that he had to catch. And this Wired article is like, looking at all the locations, like he would have had time to just bring it to his house much more than he would have to like go to Central. Like, yeah,

go out of the way to fucking go to Central Park and like stage this thing. Like it doesn't, none of it makes sense. It's almost it. It was like he thought the whole point was to stage this accident for, What end, I have no idea other than he is just absolutely bananas. I mean, there is probably some level of like, yeah, maybe this is not right. In fact, this is definitely not right. But there's probably some level of rich person that just can't conceive of a green space in New York besides Central Park.

Or like even kind of in the tri-state area. So like maybe that's why. of the woods. For all he knew, that's all the woods you got, but that's probably not right. I mean, or if,

like, if you just zoom out, right, like take what his account is, he found a bear and then it ends up in central park. Yeah, I think it was upstate,

like on the side of a highway going into New York City. So it's like, maybe he tried to eat it or something, and then he realized like, ah, shit, I can't do this. And then he's like,

fuck it. Let me ditch this thing in the park. And then I'll make up this whole other story. about how I'd it go to, you know what I mean? Like, is any of that relevant more just like, what are you up to with this fucking bear? Yeah.

The wise as to how it ended up there, in my mind, you got the bear, something wasn't up to scruff. You're like, fuck it, I'm gonna get this thing in the park. If he was driving to one of the, this is from the Wired article, if he was driving to one of the three airports closest to Peter Lugar,

that was in fucking Peter Lugar. He was in Peter Lugar. That would be strange because there is no direct route to any of them that comes remotely close to West 69th Street. Does this mean Kennedy drove 20 to 40 minutes out of the way to drop off the bear, then completely changed directions to drive 20 to 65 minutes to one of those airports? Ultimately, he could have gone to the Westchester County Airport, where he did in Central Park, would have added about 45 minutes to his trip.

This is a real indictment of Prospect Park, is what I'm saying. He should have gone to Prospect Park, obviously. parks dropped it off at the park park park club food co-op the problem here is that kennedy lived just 15 minutes from this airport at the time meaning it would have taken him less time for him to get to the airport if he had just brought the bear to his home which was allegedly his original plan but like that's what i'm saying so we have to take that off the table there was no key there was no putting that in the free this seems like something that would be in one of the pictures that they like reveal at the end of that hangover, you know, where they're like, I don't know, and then here's us with a dead bear that we hit, and then, like, we set it up and said it. And he's supposedly, like, a sober person, and he's the least sober-seeming person of all time. Like, everything he does seems like some shit that a person would do a blackout. I mean, like, his uncle got away with killing someone in a pretty, uh, pretty sloppy way. So maybe he's like, I don't know, put the bear in a bike near it. That's how we do it,

baby? I mean, the thing that, like, all this, like, logic does kind of not account for. They could also just be the dumb whims of a generationally rich person. That's what I mean. Yeah, yeah. The other thing that is consistent is him saying all these things and on some level, quote, unquote, intending to do those, but really just doing the thing that he wanted to do in the moment. Yeah, I think he got caught probably abusing a bear corpse.

I have no idea. That's what's so harrowing. It's like, what even compels someone would be like, hey, hey, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Let me get that bear in the car. And then you're like, fuck, bro, this isn't working out. Like driving by, somebody would just hit a bear screeching on your brakes to be like, I'm going to eat that. How much does a one-year-old bear weigh? A couple hundred pounds?

Yeah, I think it was about a couple hundred pounds would be my guess. That's so hard to do. It is so hard to do. Yeah. But that's why. I just seems like he's a, I mean, my, my guess would be something like the bear wasn't totally dead when it was put in the car. They did like whatever horrible or just didn't, you know, euthanized. I mean, if a black, I don't know of where a bear is.

Oh, 44 pounds. Oh, that's how much the bear was. Yeah. Oh, God. That's so horrible. Yeah, I think he was probably some sociopath shit where the bear wasn't totally dead. It was like crying in the trunk and like some shit like that, you know. It's the only way for me to get to sleep at night.

Anyway, man, that's the head of health and human services. So. Yeah. But yeah. But that's the other side of it, right? It's like, they're incompetent. They're, like, incompetent in ways that you maybe can't even imagine. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like incomprehensibly incompetent. Exactly. Incomprehensible. Yeah, like, RFK, he's like a rich kid Mark to me in my old, college drug dealer like brain where I would I could put like the most uh at the time we call swag but like dirt weed into a medical weed container and tell him as medical and charge him five times for it he'd be like that's so sick bro thank you dog thank you and I'm like exactly full get the fuck out of here I think that's the way he's on yeah I think I think but that's like that so going back

to like the first story which is just to really underline like They're not playing 4D chess. They're playing one-dimensional checkers. They're putting bicycle by bear. And yet do not, like, waste your time thinking, like, oh, well, they're doing this, so I dig this. They're not thinking of that. Like, don't level yourself up to, like, playing an opponent who's smarter than you think you are,

because this is, this is like a poker thing. You will actually start to lose against people who are worse than you because you give them too much credit. Like, be real. about who, you know, you're up against. How dumb everyone is yet. Yeah. I mean, there's plenty of examples there.

Way more predictive power than like, you're like, oh, what, what's their angle? Their angle is the thing that they are doing. Their angle is go back to Minneapolis because last time there was an uprisings like that across there was because of something that happened to people in Minneapolis and the rest of the world responded. And he's literally going, there's something about the people in this block in Minneapolis. Oh, is there. Right.

dummies. We do love doing that, though, making bad guys smarter than they are. I've always said we did that with Hitler. Hitler is a fucking idiot. Because we feel bad that we are being beaten by

fucking dummies. Because we have been put into this idea that it is a meritocracy, and you simply cannot achieve power without intelligence. Once you release that from your worldview, you start to realize, They're just bullies.

They're lucky, but that's fine. Right. But somebody has to get that lucky. Like, there is a lottery winner. It's not going to be you, but there is a lottery winner. But it doesn't mean they're smart. And they're going to act like they fucking were playing 4D chess every time in America. They will write everybody who will help them out of the book.

Yeah. How to, you know, go look at the CEO biographies. They will write every person that helped them out of the book and like get a ghostwriter to make up a narrative. where they are like some shrewd maverick that look at Elon Musk yeah the fucking it's every one of them like two months into getting

unfettered access to his thoughts you you see that not only is he not the smartest man alive he is easily stupider than you by a significant margin so like but everything's computer wow look at that

everything's computer and I look at him and I tell him to turn away turn off that laptop and I come back six minutes later. I'm ready to go. He's got laptop on and I say, hey, he's got the there gun out. Hard reset, dude. Time to ascend. Time to ascend.

He's got to temple, guys. Time to ascend, y'all. This thing should, again, should not be legal. It should not be a lot to have it. I love it. You're like, this thing shouldn't be legal as you just like wave it around. I've been holding it this whole time. You're such a little kid.

It reminds me of my kid with like a new gift. And they're like, I love this thing for. Except you're holding a theragun and a knife. It's so powerful. Truly. Yeah. You know, take a still.

Hey, dude, put the knife on the theragon. Take a still for the, yeah. This is, this is, and now you got a turkey carver. You guys are going to, yeah,

this is just read about me in the news. I can't wait to see you with your hands bandaged up next time I see you. She has some fucking weird knife there again. Oh, good. This was something else, dude. I was making a shrimp cocktail.

No. All right. So, and our final story, I was just saying the other day, you know what we don't have enough of is movies about Robin Hood? They've only had like three in the last five years. There's only like 25 in development. There's a trailer for a new one that looks kind of cool in that it stars Hugh Jackman as an elder.

It's basically Logan, but Robin Hood. It's like elderly version of Robin Hood. Hood. Laying low. But more violent. He's just like so grizzled and shit that he's gonna fucking kill everybody. Was the Kevin Costner one kind of violent? Or is that one still pretty sanitized?

I guess it's still Kevin Costner. I think it's still pretty sanitized. I mean, they show that ass. Dude. Oh, Kevin. He showed that Costner ass. Wait. I remember being like, that's not a good ass.

I don't know why. Seeing how old Hugh Jackman looked like long gray hair and thinking that person is called Robin, feels like, you too old. Oh, yeah, Robin's a little baby boy with a sweetie. Yeah, like, you should be Robert. Be Robert. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, sorry.

That was like my whole thought. I was like, that Robin is a child's name. He was a young person. It's a young person's game. Robin. Who me? My name is Robin. My name's Wobbin.

I mean, he should say Robin Hood, long beat, stare right to the camera and just go get it. Yeah. Of Loxley. You know what I'm saying? So they should do a naked gun Robin Hood, I guess. It is what I do. I mean, it was.

It's called Men and Tites. No, they should do another one with William Mason. The last successful Robin Hood movie that was actually profitable is Robin Hood Men and Tites. Wait, really? They keep making these motherfuckers. They are expensive. Well, I do think, I mean, this one at least has taken the note that, look, Game of Thrones exists. So you can't really do some shit with swords and bows and arrows that isn't insane at this point.

Right. Like, because otherwise it's so sanitized. It's part of the problem to me with, like, you know, doing more Lord of the Rings. It's not that it inherently doesn't work. It's just that the audience is a little past it, I think. Right. I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

Because that, like, that opened the door for everything else. Yeah, you need to see, like, fucking, like, gruesome throats being cut and eyeballs cut out and tities. Lord of the Rings was, like, the weed of fantasy books. Yeah. And then we just went deeper. And now everyone's just, like, doing black tar heroin. Yeah.

Yeah, so it's a little like, oh, that's cute. You're like, do the dragons fuck the wizard or? Oh, no. They're like, no. Oh, then what the fuck you? I mean, kind of. She's pregnant with. So I will say, there's, there is some controversy about this one.

I think it's still too early to tell how exactly they're going to handle it. But the trailer is like, oh, you thought we were good guys? Yeah. Robin Hood, hood, dog. We were fucked up. Dude, the stuff I've done is fucked up. you want me to make you a bow and arrow? No.

If he's still, if that's all him being like, we were fucked up. Yeah, we stole from the rich and gave to the poor, but we were fucked up. Like that still works. If he's like,

we were fucked up and economically we shouldn't have been doing what we were getting. That would learn. That would be a real bummer. But if they were just like, from the providers, from the job creators, it actually hurts the lower class more than.

If they're like, we were in the. middle of like a wild class warfare. And I'm not proud of some of the shit I did, but I did it. Like, I'm okay with that. That's cool. If he's like, no good, no Bueno. I mean, probably it's some version of like, no, it's like Pablo Escobar.

Like, give to the poor was a tactic like everything else. Yeah, yeah. It's actually P. And I could even fuck with that. Yeah. I don't know. A lot of people are like Robin Hood was evil taking from the rich and giving to the poor is kind of a weird message during the second Trump administration.

But I think that is hopefully just part of the V-O. Listen, all I'm saying is, you know, I love Jody Comer as an actor, but what if she were a photo realistic live action incredibly sexy Fox? Now, this is... Just throw that out there. Yeah, this is something to think about. In terms of the live Disney reboots. Yeah, don't let them hear about it.

Don't let Bob hear about that. The animal, the animal Robin Hood is the one that needs to think. get done. That is, that plays a very significant role in a lot of people's sexual fantasies. That's, you know, and that,

like I'm just saying Jed Alpha deserves to have their version of the same feeling. I mean, like, yeah, they're having their first experience with being let down by a TV show. I feel like there's a whole generation of people right now, the stranger things and all the conspiracy theories where like a lot of,

like people slightly are like, oh yeah, this is a thing that happens. You get a real attached to a show for many years. And then they leave you in the lurch narratively. So, yeah, maybe they do need their fox, sexy fox. I like that's hopeful. They're like, there's actually going to be a new episode that fixes all this shit,

whereas the lost people just had to be like, it was actually good. And here's my 450 page dissertation. That's a different version of denial, where it's like, one version, you're in denial about the L by justifying how bad it was. And the other version of not taking the L is by saying, No, there's going to be another one that actually, like, addresses all this. This is, listen, this is the perfect time for some enterprising tech pro to truly throw a temper tantrum

and just show us what, show us what it can really do, guys. Cody Johnson from some more news, like, had this interpretation of the loss finale that I don't remember at all now, but I was like, that is so much better than what they did. Like, if they had done that, that would have been great. That is not what they did, though. That was not what was up on the screen. but like that's fucking cool. They should have just had you make it.

What's like the best version of this Robin Hood thing? Like it's probably more it's like it's a little more complex than I was just like some dude who was like being like, yeah man, I just gave it all away to more like, yeah, dude, I'm a scumbag. But like I also, I was in touch with like the struggles of people. So I needed to like let him in. And also did I murder a few too many people in the, yeah. It was, did I get carried away?

Yeah. It was a cost. I feel like it said there was a cost. and Hill's, you know, some version of like, oh, you know, was it even worth it? I don't know. I fucking have so much blood on my hands. Yeah. Because there's like a thing where the poster taglines, like, he was no hero.

And I feel like that's some Robin Hood ass shit to say about what you did, your own shit. I'm no hero. Yes. My name is Robin. I want this. Sweetie. Yeah, you know how many melons are split. You know me skulls I pop, bro.

I'm no hero. But, but, but. Yeah. Okay. That's the sound of an error? It would also McBearrow go Bop, B, B, B,

you know what I mean? Oh, shit, Robin Hood's coming with his merry band of me. Gras! Yeah. In this movie, Robin Hood does invent dance hall, which is like a really weird. It's a really weird

second acting. That part I wasn't crazy about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're like, I hear them galloping. I hear them coming. All right. That's going to do it for this week's

weekly zeitgeist please like and review the show if you like the show uh means the world demiles he he needs your validation folks uh i hope you're having a great weekend and i will talk to you monday bye this is an i heart podcast guaranteed human