The Daily Zeitgeist - Worse Job: Oscar Host Or Trump Chief Of Staff? Steph Curry: Moon Hoaxer 12.11.18

Episode Date: December 11, 2018

In episode 291, Jack and Miles are joined by comedian Paige Weldon to discuss Steph Curry's theory on the moon landing, two jobs we can't fill in the US (Oscars host AND White House Chief of Staff), the failing of an Alt-right convention, Russian spy Matina Butina possibly flipping, Individual 1 starting to panic, a woman divorcing her ghost husband, the creation of digital doppelgängers, the fact that it is harder for children to believe in Santa these days, and more! FOOTNOTES: 1. Stephen Curry: I don’t believe we went to the moon2. DONALD TRUMP LIKES TO HIRE STAFF WHO LOOK LIKE HIM WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER, REPORT SAYS3. OSCARS 2018 Hard to Find New Host ... GIG COMES WITH LOW PAY, LOW REWARD4. Wild theories and empty seats at CPAC-style conference for the MAGA set5. Accused Russian Spy Maria Butina May Be Ready to Cooperate6. Washington Post columnist predicts Trump will resign 10 minutes before Pence so Pence can pardon him7. Louth woman married to ghost of pirate splits from her 300-year-old husband8. A Holocaust Survivor’s Digital Doppelgänger9. Man arrested after telling kids Santa isn't real10. School district apologizes after teacher tells students Santa isn't real11. Is Santa real? A version of Alexa skirts some kid questions12. WATCH: crying while she is combing her hair13. WATCH: Fishmans - Baby Blue Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th 2017 was assassinated. Crooks Everywhere unearthed the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks. She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. a lot to figure out when you're just starting your career. That's where we come in. Think of us as your work besties you can turn to for advice. And if we don't know the answer, we bring in people who do, like negotiation expert Maury Tahiripour. If you start thinking about negotiations as just a conversation, then I think it sort of eases us a little bit. Listen to Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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New episodes every Thursday. Hello, the internet, and welcome to Season 62, Episode 2 of Dirt Daily Zeitgeist! Yeah. The podcast where we take a deep dive into America's shared consciousness using the headlines, box office reports, TV ratings, what's trending on Googs and social medias. It's Tuesday, December 11, 2018. My name's Jack O'Brien, a.k.a.

It's Zeitgeist with Jack O'Brien with Jack O'Brien. That's right. On time. The Zeitgang with co-host Miles Gray. Here we go. And I'm thrilled to be joined as always by my co-host, Mr. Miles Gray. It's Miles Gray on the second rate

to the Zeitgang. I'm checking in. There's an old man sitting next to me Came from cracks, now he's podcasting kin Shout out to Weston Reynolds for that piano man. Wait, were you listening to that earlier? Because I was just about to say, I do not know why, but I have piano man stuck in my head. Yeah, I was, because I just wanted to make sure I had all my vocal melody right.

Got it, got it, got it. Well, you nailed it. It's not like where I normally sort of gaslight you by subtly giving you earworm songs. Yeah. I'm happy to be that old man and not the old man from the original song who is making love to a gin and tonic. Ah, this one's congealed, too. Sorry to show people the behind the scenes of this show, but I just started drinking Bulletproof cold brew

that has the fat and stuff in it and every time it congeals and I'm drinking gravy milk. Yeah, it's fucked up. Bulletproof needs to figure out how to mass produce their product. Someone's telling me, you're storing it too cold. Oh, fuck off.

Well, we're thrilled to be joined by a hilarious comedian who has done stand-up on Two Dope Queens. She's done acting in the reboot of Heathers and Comedy Central's corporate. Paige Weldon, welcome back. Oh, thank you so much, guys. Hi. Good to see you. You too.

I'm worried about this congealing situation. I know. I don't know what's happening. The beginning was very fine. Right. It to see you. You too. I'm worried about this congealing situation. I know. I don't know what's happening. The beginning was very fine. It was always seamless. And then the last two weeks, people have just been cracking open this congealed mess. And I think maybe our refrigerator is too cold, so the fat is hardening up in the thing. Yeah, you've got to switch it down from four to three or whatever.

Well, yeah. We can actually do it by the temperature. It's a digital readout page. Excuse me, I don't have a fancy fringe. I don't know how it works in your ice box. Yeah, I've just been putting things in salt, you know, at the back of my place. Some salted meats?

Yeah, I guess I'm weird. Okay. Yeah, the thing that you, when somebody tells you about Bulletproof Coffee, that it's coffee that has butter in it, the gross thing that comes to your mind is actually what happens when you get it. It separates. Yeah, it separates. You have chunks of butter in your coffee.

It's the only bulletproof I've ever had. I personally like it a lot. You like it chunky? Yeah, I love it. You like it old? I just like chunky beverages in general. I like my milk that when it's like a couple weeks past curdling uh yeah no well you're doing great considering that

no i'm dying uh all right well all right page we're gonna get to know you this is gonna be the whole episode i hope you're i hope everybody's good with that yeah that's fucked up we're gonna get to know you a little bit better in a moment. But first, we're going to tell our listeners a couple of things we're talking about today. We're going to talk about the latest NBA point guard all-star phenom who has announced that they believe something very, very stupid. Following up Kyrie Irving, Steph Curry has announced that he doesn't think we've been to the moon. We're going to talk about the two hardest jobs to fill right now. The two jobs nobody wants.

Oscar host and White House chief of staff. Typically not that hard to fill this year for whatever reason. Yeah. Difficult. We're going to talk about just things going south for the alt-right in general, and the fact that that Russian spy lady from a while back, she may be flipping

as well. I thought she was going to be like the hardest person to get to flip. Nah. We're also going to talk about ghost fucking, but you knew that. But first, Tuesday. Hey, it's ghost fucking Tuesday. Of course. Line up, Spectrophiles. Paige, what's ghost fucking Tuesday. Of course. Line up, Specter Files. Paige, what is something from your search history that's revealing about who you are?

Well, I feel like 90% of what I Google is phrases or expressions I've just used, and I'm unsure if I use them right. Right. So recently I Googled C above because I had been writing you know an email and I at the end of it was referencing something above I said see above and immediately I was like is that is that something people say did I just invent that and it is something people say but it sounded business speak yeah yeah see above but it just sounded wrong because I overthought it. I'm always convinced I've done it wrong. Did you spell it like the ocean?

S-E-A? Yeah. There's your problem. Was the thing you were referencing above it in the email? I used it completely correctly. I just convinced myself that I'm an idiot and I made something up. What's the origin of the second guessing of things that even grammatically track and you're like, I don't know, I may have fucked that up. I just feel like so often I'll use an expression

that I think everyone knows and someone will be like, what is that? What did you just say? And I'll be like, I really thought that everyone said that. I was trying to use that expression that's like, you can fill in whatever you want, but you say like something rich something else poor like i'm oh yeah you're uh coffee rich okay uh lack of curdling poor i don't know this

is a bad example no you nailed it yeah something like this it's not a time where i would use it but uh i feel like i've used that before and someone's looked at me like what are you talking about um right you're like i'm friend rich, but cash poor. Yeah. What does that mean? Yeah. Excuse me, Paige. You're not poor.

Okay. Your privilege needs to be checked right now. I'm like, no, it's an expression. You just talked to too many dumb people, I think. Yeah. I got to get all these fucking idiots out of my life. You're letting other people's ignorance make you doubt your own intelligence. Yeah.

I'm really smart. So that was what I wanted to get out there. See above, I think, is definitely the less common because usually you're referring to a previous email in the chain, which is below. So see below. But see above, you're just referring to something awesome you've already said. Yeah. I'm just so hyper organized that people are not on my level. It's later in the outline, the five-page outline that you've emailed to somebody.

Yeah, email me sometime. I'll send you some bullet points. Nice. What is something you think is overrated? Airbnb. Okay. I'm going to come out and say it. Airbnb is overrated.

How many experiences? I'm going to come out and say it. You're like, thank you for taking a tremendous risk with us. I mean, okay, I get that it's a better deal, but how many Airbnb experiences have you had that are 10 out of 10? I feel like most Airbnb experiences I have

are kind of weird or very weird and not worth it. Wow. You guys Airbnb a lot? I have. i don't like to stay in anything less than a five-star hotel so so i've done it for like a bit for like research just to like see what it's like yeah yeah i was at this uh this penthouse apartment in vancouver canada which was great had its own elevator and i had a good time i would give it eight out of ten for service there was no concierge okay but um no what so what are the places you stay at just people's rooms oh I mean I've had experiences

where like I usually try to pick the one that's like you have the whole place right but I just feel like there's always something off right like it's unsettling in some way um I definitely have had the experience of one time I was staying somewhere with my boyfriend. It was like a separate area. It was like the top floor of this woman's place. And she kept reiterating. She was just like, and we do live below,

but we can't hear anything. So don't worry. It's always like something happens that makes me feel like I'm being filmed or something is going on. And I'm just like, okay, I know that like there can be good experiences, but at least with a hotel, you know, if you're picking a shitty hotel, you know what you're getting into. And the person who you're interacting with has gone into hospitality, presumably because they're okay at interacting with people and they're not going to give you the impression that they're filming you.

They're not just a person who has a spare room. Right. And thought, well, we might as well. I mean, for a hundred bucks a night, we could be making way more people uncomfortable, honey. Let's have someone stay. You know my lack of people skills. Let's put those to use by having strangers

come through our house and try and sleep next to us. I can't. We can't hear anything. We can't see anything at a resolution above 360. Yeah, there's just always something wrong. And I just think it's been overall bad for society. Yeah. I thought you're going to.

I thought the take was about the like housing crises. I mean, that's another. I mean, yeah, I like to get it can perpetuate, too. I mean, that's another... But yeah. I like the weird host angle, too. Yeah. I just think... I don't know. I don't like that they're expanding into these... Just stop, I think.

What are they expanding into? These experiences and stuff. That are fucking scant... Remember, I was telling you about one because in hollywood like they were just doing ones where it's like follow a hollywood actor that'll show you all the cool spots and like i'm like okay who is this person you pull up their imdb they did like one thing like a featured extra part and then they present themselves to airbnb like guests as i've been in hollywood acting for 14 years and i know all the ins and outs where producers hang out.

And they'll sell people on this bizarro version of LA that they can guide them through. Yeah, it's like, aren't there enough ways to scam tourists? Why are we doing this? Yeah. There was one that was like, how to write poetry in Runyon Canyon. Now, that I'd like to do. No, I'm just kidding.

But it's just funny, though. Someone was like, yo, someone could pay me 40 bucks. I'll take them to Runyon and I'll be like, I'm a poet and we'll work on your poetry. It's like, dude, just do Postmates or Lyft or something. Stop. Stop. That person was the most surprised that their thing didn't sell like hotcakes, I'm sure. The one that I did see people get a lot of bad reviews on was a guy who said he could

get you into any nightclub. And then a lot of people from the Midwest show up and they're like, I couldn't believe how rude the door people were. They said we weren't dressed right. And it was sort of like, well, you know, you probably thought this guy was just going to part the sea of thirsty people at the club and you would just walk right in. Well, he did promise that. Yeah.

And then the guy was like, I'm sorry. I'm a scammer. So what's the Airbnb? How is Airbnb contributing to the housing crisis? Well, because people just buy homes to Airbnb out. Yeah, exactly. There are a lot of properties, like apartment units that others are like, oh, this would just be a passive income thing.

Right. I'll keep someone from actually living there, starting a family or whatever. Got it. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. There was also that long read a couple years ago about somebody who's went to an Airbnb with their whole family, like family reunion thing. And their dad sat on like a tree swing and the branch broke off and killed him. Sorry, it's not funny.

And, but because it was just like, and they were talking about how like Airbnb just doesn't, you know, they don't check anything. So all these things that you assume, like you kind of are in this mind state that you're like on a tourist experience. So it's as safe as other tourist experience you've been on. It's like, no, this is just some dude, like set that up a couple of days ago,

like set up a porch swing or whatever. Yeah, there's like very little accountability too. It's like at a hotel, if something is wrong, you just go to the desk. Right. If something goes wrong at an Airbnb, you're on the phone with them for days trying to get your money back.

Yeah, yeah, no, it's a lot. What is something you think is underrated? El Pollo Loco. Okay. El Pollo Loco. Thank you. Yeah, it's- I love that theme song. I love that restaurant.

I feel like it is one of the best, if not the best, in terms of fast food. And people are not giving it enough credit. Yo, I like this. I'm thinking now. I really do like El Pollo Loco. It's good quality. And I don't give it enough love, actually. I'm always talking about Taco Bell and other places.

I mean, that's a totally different thing. Yeah. I love Taco Bell as well, but they're very highly rated in the world, I feel. I feel like El Pollo Loco is not getting enough love. Yo, I used to be addicted to their pinto beans. Not addicted, but I used to just be like, I would only eat that. I would eat a family-sized thing of pinto beans. Not addicted, but I used to just be like, I would only eat that. I would eat a family-sized thing of pinto beans. Now, this is a fairly regional

one, right? El Pollo Loco? Yeah. I think so. Only in Southern California? Oh, really? I'm not sure. I mean, definitely. I've only had it out here. I think it's in other places as well, but I've not researched properly. It's not in New York. I just searched New York

and it said there are no restaurants located in New York. Wow. So the first one, so it's California, Nevada, Arizona, Utah, Texas. Yeah. But it was started in Sinaloa, Mexico. Okay.

Yeah, but I- Shout out to Miguel Angel Felix Gallardo from Narcos, Mexico. I've just been watching so much. I've been hearing so much about Sinaloa recently. Not shout out to the drug lord, actually. I always thought that El Pollo Loco was what Gus's fried chicken from Breaking Bad was based on. Because it seems very similar.

I think. Well, hey, let's not. Well, are you trying to say that they're caught up in some kind of drug trafficking? No. Oh, OK. I hope you wouldn't say that about them no no no i'm just saying follow the money hey there's a red laser on your shirt and finally what is a myth what's something people think is true you know to be false okay i don't know if this is definitely false but i feel like

people overhype the idea that a succulent is like an easy plant to take care of i feel like when you're a person who's like i always kill plants people are like well why don't you get a succulent right right and i'm like because i'll also kill the succulent right i don't know what you want me to do they're like what am i supposed to do i get a plant i don't water it for months at a time and then i just smash it on the floor yeah basically, basically. So what's going wrong here? I have a succulent right now that I've been told by the person I purchased it from, a nice kiosk at the mall, that you're supposed to water it one tablespoon a week.

And every time I do it, I'm like, this doesn't seem like enough. And that's why I killed him. But I'm trying. I'm trying. So you overwater? I don't know. Like Lenny from Of Mice and Men.

You just love the rabbit. I do not know my own strength. I don't know. Like Lenny from Of Mice and Men. You just love the rabbit. I do not know my own strength. I don't know. I just feel like people like to be like, oh, it's easy. Like there's no way you could kill one. And I'm like, try me. I'll show. I'll do it.

I will prove to you. Yeah, I didn't really. Yeah, over water. I think succulents work for me because it's just about the pace at which I remember to water a plant. I'm like, oh, shit, I need to water it. I'm like, yeah, all right, it's still good. Perfect, perfect, perfect. I've killed bamboo before.

I don't know what's wrong with me. Yeah, bamboo is like people try to kill it because it grows wide. So exclusive, yeah. That's impressive. Yeah, I'm flawed. I take my hat off to you as somebody who also is bad at taking care of planets. Thanks for getting it. Hats.

All right, let's talk Steph Curry. He recently announced he does not believe we landed on the moon. This is just always a bummer for me. And yeah, it was just last week. We're like, this guy is the perfect athlete. He's a role model. When you say he announced it, what do you mean he announced? He had to get up on a

podium. Steph Curry, I don't believe we went to the moon. So that appears to be a direct quote. Just a tweet or something? Was he high at the time? He doesn't seem like he gets high. I mean, I feel like the amount of people that believe this would shock you. I feel like whenever someone says that, I'm like, wait.

It's always someone who I thought was, like, fine. Yeah. The Warrior star appeared on Winging It with Vince Carter, Kent Bazemore, and Andre Iguodala. I guess that's a podcast, but I wouldn't check it out. Just keep listening to Daily Zeitgeist. Yeah, not if those are the kind of takes you're getting on there. Curry said, we ever been to the moon?

Multiple responders, nope. Curry, they're going to the kind of takes you're getting on there. Curry said, we ever been to the moon? Multiple responders. Nope. Curry, they're gonna come get us. I don't think so either. So. Everyone there was in agreement? Uh-huh. Yeah. Vince Carter too? So that apparently is widespread amongst NBA

players. Right. There is like this weird like I don't trust what they show us in space sentiment. Like Kyrie Irving when he was a flat earther and his more thing was like so i should just believe this thing because people keep teaching us that that's the truth right and you're like what the fuck is science i mean i guess when you put it that way well right and then he finally came back around i was like you know i that was actually a poorly that was a poor opinion kairi yeah kairi came back around and i like, you know, that was actually a poorly, that was a poor opinion. Kyrie. Yeah. Kyrie came back around and I think because enough people were like, this is a little too much. It feels like one of those things where it's like he's never said it out loud to that many people before.

And then everyone was like, mm-mm. Yeah. Shh. No, honey. Yeah. Here, look at this. Oh, I mean, you know, what proof does he need exactly? Like, he just doesn't believe that humans were able to land on the moon?

The arguments that I've always heard moon skeptics, moon hoaxers point to suggest that they've only ever seen that one picture with the flag. And they're like, where's the wind? Where's the wind? How's the flag flying out to the side? Where's the wind? Where's the wind? How's the flag flying out to the side? And there are hours of footage of people running around on the moon and jumping and playing golf on the moon with a level of gravity that would have been impossible to pull off given the special effects at the time.

And there's also a thing. They do these laser- laser ranging retro reflectors. They left them up there and we send lasers up to the moon and they reflect back because we've been there and there are devices for reflecting back to us. Maybe he's angling for a free trip to the moon. Right. You know what I mean? We're like, I don't know, man. I would have to be up there myself for free. He's like, if you sent me there, I would definitely post on Instagram and it would get the moon some good publicity. I think it's funny that you're listing all this evidence. And I'm just like, I've never even known about that because I was always just like, oh, yeah.

Yeah. I don't need to research this. Right. This is just true. right this is just true they actually sent a lunar reconnaissance orbiter a thing to like go around the moon and take photographs of it not explicitly for this but it happened to like the camera was owned by a non-us government source and uh they found that the moon isn't even real you get no whoa trippy yeah they were able to photograph like lunar landers and uh all the shit that they left up there well because yeah so china they sent a lander and a

rover to the far side of the moon okay so it'll do a lot of research on the the other side but again i don't know we'll see i mean it doesn't who knows maybe it doesn't exist i don't know i don't get it i guess my whole thing is to say that it didn't happen means that they believe there's some kind of darker, like malicious intent around saying that we did get there. Or there's been like, man, or you're just treating it like the friend who said he has a girlfriend in Canada that you'll never meet. Yeah. Well, I understand the conspiracy because we were in this like arms race with Russia and, you know, we wanted to prove that we could get there quicker. But it seems like Russia would have punched holes through it more effective than, where's the wind, bro?

If we were faking it, Russia would have had a much easier time disproving it and they have every incentive to disprove it. Yeah, it's kind of like your comparison to the friend who says he has a girlfriend. It's like, just let him have it. Why do we have to do this? Right. Maybe that's why Russia let us pretend like we've been to the moon. It's okay.

They clearly need this. It's impossible to get up there. But it just goes back. They're going to look stupid. It's just like, what does the moon feel like, huh? What's her middle name? Like a bag of sand. I like how pissed off

the astronauts who have been to the moon get at people who claim they haven't. I think Buzz Aldrin just clocked a dude. Oh yeah. Because that guy was constantly following him around too. Imagine if you had been to the moon. You'd be like you're really going to take this away from me. And the stress

of fucking having to fucking leave earth and then go to the moon like it's like i could have died no yeah i think it totally fucks you up like if you look at the interview that they conducted right after they got back they're like weirded out like they're just like what the fuck yeah i just seen some shit man i react the same way and people say i wasn't at the Coachella show with the Tupac hologram. Right. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? I was there and I saw this shit. I worked hard to get there.

Yes. Okay. But I think this illustrates just zeitgeist wise. Like we are in a dangerous place where our celebrities are incredibly influential. And in a lot of cases, you you know influential in spheres that they probably shouldn't be like steph curry is just a dude who is insanely gifted and like amazing at like finesse athletics but like the other noteworthy thing about him is nobody's disagreed with him since he was a freshman in high school right like he's got a very uniquely bad grasp on things that should be sort of everyday

understanding to the rest of us. Yeah. So you can teach Steph Curry a thing or two because you've been living in the real world for most of your life. Yeah. Yeah. And everyone's telling you you're wrong. Turns out everyone has their talents.

Right. Exactly. And maybe don't ask him about this stuff. All right. We're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back. Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16, 2017, was murdered.

There are crooks everywhere you look now. The situation is desperate. My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere, a podcast that unhurts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks. Daphne exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state. And she paid the ultimate price.

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But Trump is like really into him. Really, really into him. Like that's people like anonymous sources who like work in the White House are like, it's weird. They're like, yeah, he has a very deep affinity with Mr. Ayers. Yeah. And well, a lot of it, they say, has to do with the fact that Trump is like, he's been saying that Nick Ayers reminds him of him when he was younger. Is there any worse reason to like someone?

Right. Yeah. But I guess. I just love me so much. Yeah. I like a dumber, less experienced version of me. That's who I trust the most. Yeah.

Well, I mean, I don't know if that freaked Nick Ayers out and he's like, dude, I'm not going to get single white female by this dude or whatever. Or if he really I mean, I think the wise money is on the idea that the whole administration is in the process of free falling and he probably doesn't want to be anywhere near that. Sure. And he's just distancing himself from that because he's still a young man and doesn't want to you know self-own and knock his career out just so early on yeah which i think is fair yeah and very reasonable of you yeah i mean he's a weird fucking guy and has questionable ethics but aside from that yeah i can't blame you for not taking the job really i feel like right now in this day and age we're just really digging for anything that makes any sense i'm like right yeah at least understand

this aspect of what's going on yeah that's a good point something to hold on to yeah i guess the thing that i have learned from this story other than that it seems like things are worse behind the scenes than we might have thought is that nick Ayers is terrifying and we should keep an eye on him. Oh, yeah. If Trump is like, that's my guy. That's who I was when I was his age. Or Nick Ayers is incredibly intelligent and knows how to just play this man's ego. Which is either way frightening.

Yeah, either way bad. Because if you're willing to be like, really be a sycophant to Trump where he's like, I like this guy. Like, you have to be off your fucking rocking chair. But I guess, you know, also when you look at what's coming down the pipe for somebody who would be chief of staff, you have the Democrats controlling the House and subpoenas coming out of every which way. That's a lot of coordination. He has to do his staff to get people on the right messaging. You have Mueller surprises happening left and right. And I don't think you want to be the guy who's having to, like,

keep the Trump team in check during all this. No, it seems like a very difficult job. Like, it's everything you hear from John Kelly is just like, this is the worst job in the world. Right. And not because it's everything you hear from john kelly is just like this is the worst job in the world right and not because it's easy and boring because it's just non-stop he would say that after you know trump did something that was impossible to predict and also impossible to contain yeah it's impossible to keep him on message so like and as chief of staff like when you're dealing with like massive headline scandal type shit you you don't be like, OK, this is what we're trying to say.

And then he'll immediately go out and just do some stream of consciousness bullshit. Yeah. When you're a manager, you learn that like one of the worst things for people's like job satisfaction is unpredictability. Like it's good for entertainment value. It's good for entertainment value, but if they don't know what their job is going to be like day to day and can't count on that, it kills you slowly. I also am interested to see how this affects the president's relationship to VP Michael Pence. Michael. Michael.

He and I are on the opposite of a first name basis. But there's been this sort of background buzz of stories where people say that Trump goes around asking people if they think he can trust Mike Pence. So he's like already paranoid about him. He's already jealous of his chief of staff and like wanted his chief of staff because he probably saw how much easier mike's life is because he just stays the fuck out of the headlines and so he now had that chief of staff turn him down when he asked him to prom and i just feel like this won't do good things for their relationship probably well yeah maggie haberman was reporting that behind the scenes Trump was fucking humiliated when Ayers was like,

I'm sorry, honey, no. And that's a thing. I think as you put it, an emotion he tries to avoid. Right. And naturally he would. And the other thing too is even with the ouster or the resignation or whatever you want to call John Kelly's leaving, the way it was supposed to go down was Kelly was going to say something today on his own.

Right. And they had agreed and they had come together and been like, okay, you can come through. We'll do it on your terms. Let's make this nice for you. And then on Saturday, just off the cuff, he was like, yeah, yeah, and John Kelly's going to be leaving. Right.

You cannot tell this guy anything. No, and you can't just – there's nothing – yeah. Which is how we know that all conspiracies are bullshit because if he had learned that aliens shot JFK, he would have told us by now. Real blabbermouth. Although they probably wouldn't

tell him also. No. Like the CIA and FBI know better than to do that. And we're still believing that there's a binder they show you. Yeah, just one roll of film that they hide under a church pew somewhere. As we learned at the end of The Rock.

So there was a big alt-right con over the weekend. Convention. I probably need to clarify. Convention. And it featured the likes of Laura Loomer, Jack Posobiec, convention. Yeah. And it featured the likes of Laura Loomer, Jack Posobiec, whatever.

And it- Mike Cernovich. Mike Cernovich. Stephen Molyneux. Weird Mike Cernovich. There's all kinds of people there. Is Laura Loomer the Twitter? Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. And it did not draw as well as people were expecting. Yeah. They called it the American- Yeah. American Priority Conference in DC. First of as people were expecting. Yeah. They called it the American Priority Conference in D.C. First of all, bad name. Yeah.

Horrible. Yeah. And it's basically like what CPAC is, but to the right of that even, which is hard to imagine what that is even like. And it's because it's a lot of QAnon shit, people from like Gateway Pundit or formerly of Gateway Pundit, just of Gateway Pundit just all varieties of wacky alt-right kind of talk yeah real goofs

yeah a bunch of goofballs there but the photos of the thing are so so sad like a lot of Will Summer went to I guess a panel that was called why you should subscribe to PewDiePie was a thing and there were maybe nine people like in this gigantic ballroom like for at a hotel.

Wow. And then even like the as like the D.C. police said, they're like, oh, yeah, a couple dozen, like two to three dozen at most in each room. But a lot of the journalists who were there were like, that is a very generous estimation of who can. Well, it was 165 bucks a ticket. a very generous estimation of who can. Well, it was $165 a ticket. And yeah, like all these people, they're in constant just like weird scandals. Like Jack Posobiec has like constantly been caught trying to cheat on his wife on Bumble by people.

And like Cernovich is just a weird, weird, sad dude who drinks and goes like on live streams and just says nonsense. Like the brand is fucking just failing. It's just so funny to be like evil. And your problem is that like people don't really like you very much. Right. You're kind of unpopular. Yeah.

Sorry. It's funny now. But like that used to be sort of what I would have expected. But now it seems like this is a new direction for the alt-right where they're in somewhat of a spiral. Yeah, and I think they thought, well, I mean, I'm sure at the very beginning of the administration and the tail end

of the 2016 election, like, okay, we got an audience here. And then they just, they made their move too late and realized, oh, nobody is fucking with us anymore. And all the retweets I'm getting is probably from people who are ridiculing me. Right. And then Anthony Scaramucci was there for some reason. And apparently like gassed up a bunch of QAnon believers like at an event called Coffee with Mooch.

And apparently they're saying in political, they said he spoke glowingly of the theory, the QAnon theory, as a couple from Stafford, Virginia, showed their Q paraphernalia. And then apparently he told these people that he's like, you're not going to believe who it is to these people. Who Q is? Yeah. Wow. And they're like, oh, my God. So you do know. And he's like, yeah, you're not going to believe it.

And then he goes away. And then like these journalists from Politico went up to him like, yo, did you just tell them something about QAnon? And he kind of denied he had said anything about it. And then those same journalists went to the couple he was talking to. And they go, yeah, he's talking about Q. Oh, my God. I mean, don't take advantage of these people with their fantasy QAnon.

That's so sad. Right. But hey, you know, it's likeon. That's so sad. Right. But hey, you know, it's like Harry Potter for baby boomers. Yeah. But like sad, sort of lost spiritually and emotionally tweets and like message board posts from Q followers when something happens that makes it seem indisputable that the Q thing was bullshit. Yeah.

Or that Mueller is working against Trump rather than with Trump, as they all believe. Yeah. Like, I haven't spoken to my wife. Because I have a headache. This is so stressful. I haven't spoken to my wife in months. Yeah. Please tell me this isn't all bullshit. Like, I've lost my family over this.

Like, I really do believe Q, but I need something to help me. I need more than this. It's like, oh, just anyway. Gavin McGinnis, former Vice Co-Founder and Proud Boy leader. Last week or a couple weeks ago, the FBI designated the Proud Boys as a extremist group. And then took it back again like a the special agent in charge they asked about it and they're like well i mean it's not quite an extremist group and it sounded i don't know it didn't quite it wasn't convincing i think the feds are still

investigating their actions but maybe their designation's been changed right cool how nothing means anything right it's very exciting yeah, but now he's lost. Gavin McInnes' YouTube channel is gone. He was on CRTV and The Blaze when those two gross networks teamed up together. They're like, oh, Gavin McInnes will no longer have a show here. And he's been kind of just hiding in Westchester. Right. Basically. But he's getting canceled because people recognize that his beliefs are awful.

But I don't know. If you look at the other people who are on that network, you're like, these people are just less maybe aggro. Oh, like Steven Crowder, the guy who did the meme who's like, male privilege doesn't exist. Try and convince me otherwise. Like that guy. Cool, cool, cool. Chill.

Yeah. Great guy. Yeah. It's more like that kind of, it's more like a sort of provocative conservative commentary and i guess maybe in that sense like gavin mckinnis like no one has quite a weird like quasi gang that he does but that's the line turns out okay so and i mean de-platforming has worked, it seems like. Yeah, look at fucking Milo. Yeah, Milo Yiannopoulos is out here begging people for money. Throwback.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And then denying that he's begging people for money and being like, I make 40K a month. Yeah, didn't he have a book deal or something? He did that. Simon & Schuster immediately vaporized when they were like, hold on. Yeah, this isn't a good look for us. Yeah, I've stopped

keeping track of Milo, unfortunately. He's not, he owed Cartier like 125K or something like that. And he had to return the jewelry.

Oh my God. Yeah, he had, he was in all kinds of trouble. But yeah, that shows you, you know, like, these people, they get the benefits of having their fuego take

and people are like, whoa, this is so crazy. I love it. And then after a while, like I think most people like this is racist, xenophobic, homophobic, whatever. We need to get the fuck out of here. And then people aren't really fucking with it. It's like it was all fun and games for a while, guys. Yeah.

But not anymore. And also in bad news for the right, that Russian spy lady may be flipping, Maria Bettina. Yeah. I assume because the story basically seemed to indicate, as reported a couple months ago when she was caught, that she was a Russian operative who was trained by Russia to infiltrate the NRA and various conservative networks. to infiltrate the NRA and various conservative networks. And based on that, you assume she's more likely to eat a cyanide pill than to turn state's witness. Yeah. But...

Well, it was weird because when she was in custody, there was a lot of reports that a lot of Russian officials were visiting her in prison. Yeah. And you're like, oh, that's not shady. Right. Because she's a student, as you say, who just got mixed up in some weird stuff. They're friends. Yeah. It's no big deal oh, that's not shady. Right. Because she's a student, as you say, who just got mixed up in some weird stuff.

They're friends. Yeah. It's no big deal. It's no big deal. And yeah. And I think when you look at sort of what happened with the NRA, like them giving like 30 million dollars to the Trump campaign and a lot of the money there couldn't really trace back to someone they believed was giving the money. They're like, OK, so was she the conduit to bring Russian money into the campaign vis-a-vis the NRA? But yeah, the reason why everyone's like, oh, I think she's going to flip is because she told the judges like, I would like to change my plea. Because initially she was, I am not guilty. So I don't know what she, so clearly you're maybe pleading guilty and you have some kind

of a little deal going. Or pleading extremely not guilty. How do you plead now? I'm going to kind of a little deal going or pleading extremely not guilty but in good news for everybody on the right who has staked their reputation and relationships with their wives and uh children on the idea that trump has a plan and this is all gonna come together and q is gonna save us all don't worry because trump is cool as a cucumber so cool yeah as a cucumber uh totally not doing weird panic tweeting in the morning right at all monday morning was very very very calm tweeting about fucking he's so fucking panicked i don't know what else to say yeah it's a lot of okay so what if i did do it who cares yeah uh and also i'm the president and you're not yeah fuck off

well i think basically every subtext of every tweet is right i'm the president you're not yeah right well i think after you know we saw all we saw all the filings that Mueller made over the weekend in regards to Cohen's cooperation and Manafort's lies, the Manafort document was so censored. So we'll never quite know yet what was going on there. But with the Cohen one, you could tell that he definitely wasn't cooperating at first, which is why the Southern District of New York is like, no, this guy needs to go to jail. But it also basically shows that the president directed two felonies to be committed. And that is like, so he might not be technically this sort of named co-conspirator, but like it's getting closer and closer and individual one is he is

so lovingly referred to in all these documents is my new favorite thing to call him. Yeah, like it's just getting worse and darker. And now we're seeing like that there were at least 14 different people in the Trump camp that were contacted by Russia. Individuals. Yeah. Yeah. It seems like those two documents were filed by Mueller last week, but it took people a

while to kind of like piece together what all the information was. And then over the weekend, people started being like, oh, this is really bad for him. Yeah, this does not look good for the president. Facing legal, like criminal liability when he's out of office. He's like, okay,

we're not going to try and figure out, you know, can you indict a sitting president or whatever? He's like, but guess what? Whenever your term is over and you're just a regular Joe again, you could be facing some real criminal liability yeah that's what i don't like that we're adding motivation for him to never not be president right yeah yeah let's tell him it'll happen at any given time we don't know well it's tough because he's losing support within the party though too because they realize how much of a hit they're taking in terms of like their their brand or party platform not being really appealing to anybody except for very close minded like white Americans.

And, you know, I think he needs that. And then even like Marco Rubio on the Sunday shows, he didn't quite defend Trump like, oh, this is all bullshit. on the Sunday shows, he didn't quite defend Trump and be like, oh, this is all bullshit. He did a half-ass like, well, yeah, we're seeing a lot of things, but let's look at everything before we jump to conclusions. Meaning like, it seems like he's still trying to weigh which way he wants to go. But I think as we look at the president's evolving quote unquote legal strategies over the years, he usually goes from, I never did it. I don't know the fuck you're talking about fake news too. Okay. I might've done it. Maybe. I don't know. I can't remember from, I never did it. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, fake news, to, okay, I might have done it.

Maybe. I don't know. I can't remember, too. Maybe I did it. Who cares? And then finally it would be, I did it,

but I'm the president, so what the fuck are you going to do? So we'll see where this goes from here. All right, we're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back. Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16, 2017, was murdered. There are crooks everywhere you look now. The situation is desperate.

My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere, a podcast that unhearts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks. Daphne exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state. And she paid the ultimate price. Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, I'm Gianna Pradenti. And I'm Jemay Jackson-Gadsden. We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline, a new podcast from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts. When you're just starting out in your career, you have a lot of questions. Like, how do I speak up when I'm feeling overwhelmed? Or, can I negotiate a higher salary if this is my first real job? Girl, yes! Each week, we answer your unfiltered work questions.

Think of us as your work besties you can turn to for advice. And if we don't know the answer, we bring in experts who do, like resume specialist Morgan Saner. The only difference between the person who doesn't get the job and the person who gets the job is usually who applies. Yeah, I think a lot about that quote. What is it like you miss 100 percent of the shots you never take? Yeah, rejection is scary, but it's better than you rejecting yourself. better than you rejecting yourself. Together, we'll share what it really takes to thrive in the early years of your career without sacrificing your sanity or sleep. Listen to Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I've been thinking about you. I want you back in my life. It's too late for that. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All's too late for that. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. One session. 24 hours. BPM 110. 120.

She's terrified. Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that? You didn't figure it out? I think I need to hear you say it. That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. This machine is approved and everything?

You're allowed to be doing this? We passed the review board a year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. They're just dreams. far, far away. No, babe, that's taken. We're in our own world, remember? Right, in our own world. We're two space cadets.

And totally normal humans. Sure, totally normal humans. Embark on a journey across the stars, discovering the wonders of the universe one episode at a time. We'll talk about life, love, laughter, and why you should never argue with your co-pilot. Especially when she's always right. Right.

And if we hit turbulence, just blame it on Mercury retrograde. Or Emily's questionable space piloting skills. Hey! Join us on In Our Own World for cosmic conversations, stellar laughs, and super corny dad jokes. Listen to In Our Own World

as a part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And don't worry, we promise to avoid any black holes. Most of the time. And we're back. And we're back. And one of the weirder kind of ongoing trends that we've seen in the zeitgeist is back in the news, Miles. Yeah.

Ghost fucking. Yeah. Spectrophilia. That's not a joke. It seems to be a thing. It seems to be a thing that people are reporting is happening in their lives more and more. Who are they reporting this to? Well, first there was a woman from I think the UK

who met an Australian ghost. Right. And then she was like, and we joined the Mile High Club. Right. Okay, you masturbated in an airplane bathroom. Yeah, you're a criminal.

Yeah. Okay, right. Thank you. Okay. And that was a story. And then when I brought it up this morning, somebody was like,

didn't we just talk about this? I'm like, no, this is a different story. This is about a woman in Ireland named Amanda Sparrow Large, who is a very, very enthusiastic Captain Jack Sparrow impersonator. Oh, no. And she spent a lot of money to look like Captain Jack. She changed her middle name to be Sparrow. And at first she was like in the news a few years ago because there's like woman like has is done with regular men is into ghosts. Yeah.

And the story goes that she felt the presence of a 300 year old Haitian ghost who was killed for thievery on the high seas. OK. And and when I feel like the theme here is that everyone seems to have a lot of details about the backgrounds of the ghost. I mean, I guess it's nice they're getting to know each other before. Yeah. But this is so crazy. Okay, well, this is what I'm saying. Okay, I'm sorry.

She said he looked like the Pirates of the Caribbean character, adding, he is dark-skinned and has jet-black hair, so he tells me. Wait, so she can't see him. That's weird to me. So you're just feeling the presence and his hot ghost breath on you? And then she said- Would that be cold ghost breath? I don't know.

I would hope that's the one thing that the ghost can maintain. Sort of steamy. Yeah, he can maintain another thing if you read the rest of the story. Yeah, well, Amanda's feelings for Jack grew as they got to know each other more, and then one day he told her they could actually be together. Another thing grew, if you know what I'm saying. Thank you, prop comedian. I will be here all night.

Although she never had a spiritual boyfriend before, she did some research and realized she wasn't the only one to have a relationship with a spirit. I told him I wasn't really cool with having casual sex with a spirit and i wanted us to make a proper commitment to each other i wanted a big traditional wedding with the white dress it was very important to me but sadly this story is about how this love affair has come to an end uh and she ghost her i'm sorry i should have said that i'm sorry i never read that i take it back uh she said she just

came out with a statement recently which brought her name back in the news and said, I will explain all in due course. But for now, all I want to say is be very, her emphasis, careful when dabbling in spirituality is not something to mess with. Hey, that's what exorcists have been saying lately. Yeah. You know. It's just so funny.

It's just like she's speaking the same way you would if you had like a bad experience dating a guy it sounds like she's just trying to she's just trying to put Haitian men in a bad light yeah

right yeah but don't get involved with these Haitians right she didn't say that yeah that would be amazing

if that was the conclusion she drew oh no I just I feel like why didn't someone what does her friends and family think? She has like five children. And no one was like, okay, so mom has expressed interest in becoming Jack Sparrow.

Should we address that? Should we do something before it becomes worse? I don't know. She says a lot of it comes up with that. She, uh, I think identifies as asexual and then, well,

that's fine. And then I think her, but she was saying like around her community that it was very like not supportive of anything she did. So maybe this just kind of, maybe she, I don't know how alienated she was from her family already. Maybe they weren't at a certain point with the family. They don't say how close she is, but I don't know how alienated she was from her family already that maybe they weren't at a certain point with the family they don't say how close she is but

I don't know like yeah if you're saying like yo mom what the what's good with all this Jack Sparrow shit right I'm not saying it has to be phrased like that oh okay they could have a nice sit down with her and figure out what's going on deeper. I mean, clearly she is obsessed with this sort of fabulous version of history. She dresses up like a Disney version of a job from history. So she's already obsessed with history. And then I do wonder, as we become lonelier and our interactions with other people become more mediated by technology, what's to distinguish dating somebody who you meet online and never see from some dude that you're reading about and imagining is going back and forth to you?

I guess there's a huge difference. I would guess mental illness. Right. I mean, I guess we should just say, does everyone here not believe in ghosts? Where are we at? Do we think that they're real? Hey, don't get me on, Mike. I don't want to give a take on this.

I'm sort of agnostic about ghosts. Okay. This does, just all the stories that we've been covering about, like we talked recently about how the Catholic Church is reporting a spike in exorcisms and the Atlantic wrote like an in-depth article about it. And it was pretty unnerving. And now everybody's fucking ghosted. It feels like the beginning of Ghostbusters 2 when like all these like weird things start

happening in New York City and it's like there's something amiss. Right. And that toaster was acting up in the kitchen too. Right. Yeah. Jumping around and shit. No, that is for sure. I wonder if it is because we have become so technologically aligned that the opposite would be to embrace a fucking ghost.

Like if you took a look at how the pendulum is swinging more and more violently towards technology, like ghosts feel like the spirit world is like anti-technology. Right. the spirit world is like anti-technology. Right. That maybe that's just something we're seeing across the board is like spirits. Some people hear it. Some people fear it are out here just embracing it. I don't know.

Yeah. And I mean, you have more access to like a greater variety of historical documents from that period. So you can get like more in touch with a period in history than you ever have been able to before before just because of the internet and having the entire history of information at your fingertips. And then yeah, if you feel lonely or you feel isolated by technology, maybe this is a different direction to take it.

Now the other alternative reason that we've seen two stories like this in a row is because somebody wrote that first story and then other newsrooms saw that it got a lot of clicks right and then they check up on that other lady yeah well because what's going on with her right because there's always people with mental illnesses pitching stories to newsrooms that actually was one of my first jobs out of college was at abc responding to reader mail. And the thing you realize quickly is like 80% of the letters to the newsroom are people who are paranoid and think they're being like. Right, right, right. And they're like, oh, I've got a scoop for you.

Yeah, exactly. People who think there's no way they won't respond because this is huge news. Yes. Right. Exactly. They're like, I'm fucking a ghost who's a Haitian pirate and I'm Jack Sparrow. I assume you'll be in contact soon. I'll speak with you then.

But I could see something like this. Like there is this story in the New Yorker recently. Oh, you have a lot of time. Oh, okay. You have enough time to get through all the New Yorkers? Yeah. I had it for a fucking like three months and I was like, no, too many fucking magazines. It caused a lot of anxiety.

But when I do have time to read it, it's worthwhile. And there was this article about how they're making digital imprints of Holocaust survivors at this museum in the LA area, I think, where they basically put a Holocaust survivor in a room with like 116 cameras, I think it is. And they just ask them like thousands of questions about their experience. And it's basically in order to recreate like that person for future generations once like Holocaust survivors have passed on.

Right. And like they're basically getting a full imprint of every answer to every question that somebody might have. And you'll just be able to sit across from a Holocaust survivor once they've all passed away. Wow. So I do wonder if there's some technological version

of this coming where we can date people who've been dead for 100 years could you imagine like our great-grandchildren they're like i'm with a holocaust survivor right like digital imprint right that's why i'm in love with yeah yeah because in theory if you've asked someone i mean i guess they're just asking questions about their experience are they asking them questions about like themselves and their life like what do you think about Steph Curry's take on the moment? Yeah, because it's like in theory, if you really sat someone down and asked them every possible question, then you could know them as this hologram or whatever. Yeah.

No, I think so. Wasn't there that article that was like the questions you ask to fall in love or whatever? Oh, right. Like 37. It's like some version of that. Right. Huh. But also that's crazy that they're doing that with Holocaust survivors.

Right. And so weird and heavy. Yeah. But I guess it makes sense just for posterity, you know, like that you have this thing that it won't be, like, you know, written texts can be vague sometimes or can be interpreted a few ways, but to have someone, see them yeah answer the questions or whatever it's crazy also that it's like i'm sure there are holocaust survivors who

are like i'd rather not sit and answer every possible question yeah there definitely are thanks this was about one specific uh woman english loss who was a childhood friend of anne frank and like had this really fascinating way that her life intertwined with Anne Frank's. And Anne Frank's father actually married her mother after her father and Anne Frank's mother passed away. Yeah, I mean, sometimes I feel like we're giving people a sort of digital imprint of ourselves as podcast hosts that release five hours of ourselves

talking on a weekly basis that like, you know. Just what? Y'all still don't know me. Right. No, that's not true. You know, every day. He wouldn't even say whether he believes on you or not. My dad over the weekend was like, yeah, man, I learned more about you through listening

to the show than you even tell your own dad. Yeah. And I'm like, well, look up hashtag more seven hashtag. He never came to my track. I mean, if he would talk to you as often as you do this podcast, he would know you. Well, I think it's weird because there's a lot of anecdotal stuff that I bring up from my childhood or whatever that at the time, why would my parents know about my misdeeds as an adolescent?

Oh, yeah. My mom listens to my podcast as well, and she will correct me. She'll be like, that's not true. She's like, I never went to that's not true. She's like, I never went to JCPenney. I'm like, okay. I'm sorry. My dad corrected me.

He's like, you know, your grandfather was the first black man to shop at Fedco before it became Costco. Oh, nice. No, but that's a bizarre claim

my grandfather's been saying for a long time. He's like, I was the first black man to shop at Fedco. That's such a critique. I was like, cool. That's awesome.

There's no way to prove it, but it's genius. Yeah. And one other story we wanted to talk about uh for all you parents out there uh is the question of whether it's harder for kids to believe in santa claus in 2018 our writer jm mcnabb contributed this story he said he had been seeing this all over the news yeah, this is the other story that's been dominating the headlines is he was pointing out that a substitute teacher was removed from a New Jersey school district after telling a group of first graders that Santa Claus is not real. And then a bishop in Illinois told kids that the good works of St. Nicholas were gradually changed into the story of

Santa Claus, but that it was like this historical construction and not Coca-Cola and not a magical being who comes down your chimney. And he was pointing out that this is actually a thing. He saw those two stories last year and he was like, oh, they're telling the same thing again. But it was a different substitute teacher and a different bishop that were doing it. So it's like it's a thing that's out there that is happening i guess it makes sense if you work with kids and you have like a breakdown one day just like santa's not real right yeah what can i hate all of you yeah i can't put my hands on them right so figure out to the next thing hey just you know santa is a

fucking joke my man you are a fucking idiot it's stupid that you ever thought he was you're so stupid i'm sorry say that again how does santa do it i'm sorry i thought i was supposed to teach you now let's think about that okay savannah and mckenzie okay yeah he flies around in one fucking have you ever really thought about it yeah didn't think so and then the florida version of course a man stood in the middle of the cape coral festival of lights on saturday and screamed that santa claus isn't real for like an hour for hours actually multiple hours wait what yeah uh tormenting children and making them cry sure anyway that's a first amendment baby yeah exactly he had a sign that should be put in the laws with like you can't yell fire you also can't yell santa isn't it i mean i don't did you pay did you grow up believing santa yeah but i like um my friends growing up were like my neighbors who

were all like a couple years older than me and then so i found out pretty early oh okay yeah how early like i can't remember how old i was but i remember my mom being like damn it oh for real you're too little i told it but i felt bad i didn't want to get my friend in trouble so i was like oh i could just tell that on the presents that say they're from santa it's your handwriting right see as like it was elisa wasn't it i was like yeah this is just the war on christmas you know i mean just keep going you get these people equivalent of a suicide bomber of christmas to go at this fair and be like santa isn't real in front of these kids?

Are you serious? Sean Hannity, do something. Well, I thought you were going to say it's because of the internet. Well, yeah, so... Look it up. Well, yeah, that too. That is true.

So the additional wrinkle in the modern world is kids can just ask Alexa, like, is Santa Claus real? What does Alexa say to that? If the parents haven't... Alexa, is Santa real? And I just Alexa say to that if the parents haven't Alexa is Santa real and I just fucked up so many people's mornings because people always go you're supposed to say echo

echo anyways the regular version is Santa makes a lot of people hopeful for a happy holiday and I definitely believe in that so you would have to be a very dodging the question. Yeah, if you were a kid and Alexa gave you that response, you'd probably just move on

and be like, well, I guess I have to go Google it. Well, Google is even kind of careful with their shit too. Like when you search it, it doesn't actually give you like a yes or no. It just gives you all sorts of like fan art and porn of santa just having sex with like uh penny from inspector gadget yeah he is really fucked up okay santa is really oh yeah they show you like it'll give you a link to the santa tracker on google and then underneath of of slew of articles show up of like yo how to like tell your kids because we get it a lot of you need this as like a disciplinary crutch to be like yo santa you want that shit and i'll fucking call him yeah santa is both carrot and stick we were talking about earlier because you have the if

you're good but you can also if you're bad that's that's the genius of the santa myth we are not quite at the point where we are using that because i don't think my son is old enough to fully grasp the idea of what Christmas is going to be. Yeah. Dude, he's going to be stoked when he finds out. I know. I just remember, you know, I wonder the people who are like really out there being like, I'm going to tell these kids it doesn't exist. like I'm going to tell these kids it doesn't exist if they're coming from a place of they never had the magic of Santa

so they're salty or they believe that shit is so hardcore and because there was a guy who we were going to talk about it last week or I was going to put it in the doc last week of this dude who went on Hannity to talk he was like a child psychologist like it's not necessarily the best thing to tell your kids that Santa

is real and insist that Santa is real or use that as a disciplinary crutch. Like, and it wasn't even like the most sound thing, like it's going to cause long-term trauma. Just sort of looking at it of like trust in a relationship or whatever. If some of these people are like, they were really upset that the Santa thing got ruined for them. Right. And now they just want to make sure kids don't have to feel the same pain. There's definitely at least three Hallmark movies in that premise alone right there. Oh, right.

If someone, yeah. Somebody is a professional Santa skeptic and then like some Christmas magic enters their life and makes them a believer that has probably already been made multiple times by Hallmark. Yeah. I just couldn't. Thanks, Hallmark. I got in trouble for saying Santa didn't exist a lot. Yeah, because you were a skeptical three-year-old, I think.

Well, my mom's from Japan, and my dad's an artist. And so they're not, in terms of American culture tradition, they're outliers. So I wasn't being fed the thing of, and Santa's real, and make your list, or whatever. All the shit I got would be from going to school and hearing it at school but at home it was like uh yeah santa exists and i remember i stayed up all night and i saw my parents you know putting presents under the tree and i was like all right then right i'll see you on the morning i see how it is the fact that they let you stay up they had no no i was sneaking out of my room okay Oh, okay. I was on some pretend I'm asleep shit and then go out and be like, what's going on? Yeah.

This is like a weird pressure that we put on parents where it's like, if you accidentally let your kids see you putting the Christmas presents, now you've ruined their childhood. You're a bad parent. Well, it's almost like the anti-vaxxer thing if you tell your kids because they're going to tell everybody that they know that it's a lie so like yeah you're almost keeping it up for other parents who want you to keep it up but it turns into this like enforced morality that seems kind of silly when you sit back and you're like right okay wait so i have to tell my kids this magical being exactly enters our home

but now i'm like bad if i don't do that. Or else you have a tradition suicide bomber in the form of your child who goes into school and spreads the word, not Santa. Right. So you kind of have to be careful because you're making the decision for your kid, but also everybody else's kid. I'm not that bad.

I mean, the truth is the truth. I'd be like, oh, so Santa's real? Yeah. So I'm lying to my kid? Yeah. That's your motherfucking problem, Mark. I was really mad and dispirited

when I found out for like an afternoon and then I was like, oh, I get it because my little sister still believed and I was like,

oh, this is fun to like. I felt like in school too, like around third grade or something, there were kids who cried about hearing, like that was a thing

I feel like I remember being like, they just found out Santa wasn't real. Yeah. Sad. Yeah, like what the fuck? I feel like I remember being like they just found out Santa wasn't real yeah sad yeah like what the I feel like I remember it meaning like almost nothing to me I was just like okay I guess that makes sense yeah all right I'm good I also used to every time I would go see Santa at like Kmart or whatever I would sob oh yeah I fucking hated it so I was like good I don't have to go to Santa anymore because I get scared. It's scary. There are some pretty handy tips in The Guardian that are like how to like mentally jujitsu your kids about Santa.

One woman was like, tell your kids when they get old enough that now they are Santa. What? That they are the one who can now spread gratitude and joy. After you tell them Santa doesn't exist, right? No. Their whole thing is about like just sort of constantly tailoring it so you never say that Santa doesn't exist right no that you no that their whole thing is about like just sort of constantly tailoring it so you never say

that it doesn't exist that you kind of move along with their intelligence that eventually they'll realize it doesn't exist but you're not

always being like Santa's real he's this magical dude or whatever right just be like and you see other people dress like him

because many of us can be Santa Santa is a spirit yeah yeah that you wanna that you wanna have sex with right Santa is a spirit. Yeah. That you want to have sex with. Right. Santa is a sexually transmitted disease

that because you sat on his lap you're dirty now and you are Santa. Is that the premise of the Tim Allen movie? Yeah. The Santa Claus. Yes. Well Paige it has been a pleasure having you. It's been wonderful to be here. Where can people find you? I'm on the internet

at Paige Weldon on Twitter, Instagram. You can also listen to my podcast, Mall Talk. Mall Talk. At Mall Talk Pod on also Twitter

and Instagram. Tell us about Mall Talk. Oh, I host it with my friend, another comedian, Emily Faye. We have a guest on. We talk about the mall.

We talk about a specific store, their mall growing up, stuff like that. Play games. Can I come on? Yeah. Because I used to work at the mall. Where? Fashion Square. At what store?

The Coach store. Ooh. Yeah. We're going to have to talk about that. And I ate so many Wetzel's pretzels every motherfucking day. Are you a Wetzel's or an Auntie Anne's? Well, they only had Wetzel's there. But Auntie Anne's, as I say only had Wetzel's there, but Auntie Anne's,

as I say, Auntie. Very fancy of you. That was the first foray into pretzel addiction. And then I think Wetzel's just became a little more... It's a little more accessible. Yeah, and they went a little more outside the box. They were like, what else can we do with this dough?

Let's put some more stuff on there. Let's wrap a hot dog in it. Pepperoni, etc. I think Auntie Anne's dough? Let's put some more stuff on there. Let's wrap a hot dog in it. Pepperoni, et cetera. I think Auntie Anne's does some of that, but... Yeah, no. It doesn't really... Not like Wetzel's does. No. Yes.

It's different. And they don't have drinks that are so sweet, they melt your teeth. It's bad. Yeah. It's a bad scene over there. And this is mall talk. Yeah. Here we are.

Is there a tweet you've been enjoying? Oh, I like this one from the moon pie twitter account where they screenshotted a dm that says the moon pie should contain more fiber imo in my opinion and they they tweeted okay baby because the picture is a picture of a baby so i really like that one. Clap back. Yeah. Okay, baby. I guess I like memes is what I'm...

Who doesn't? I mean, they're funny. That's why they're popular. Miles, where can people find you? Follow me on Instagram and Twitter at milesofgray. Tweets I like. One is from past guest, Lori Kilmartin. Uh, it says Britain,

admit you fucked up and beg the EU to take you back. Um, and another one is from, uh, Jake at Jake, G R N R. It just says, it's a quote tweet.

First. It's offset going. Fuck y'all. I miss Cardi. And his quote is, sir, this is a McDonald's. Uh, tweet. I've quote is, Sir, this is a McDonald's. Tweet I've been enjoying.

James Felton tweeted a picture of the headline from the mail that says, May, back me or get Corbin and no Brexit. And he tweeted, Rarely seen, quote, eat your vegetables or we're buying a puppy and going to Disneyland. Parenting tactic here. And Steely Dan Fogelberg tweeted, comedians bitching about PC culture is the new Walken impression. It is. You can find me on Twitter at Jack underscore O'Brien.

You can find us on Twitter at Daily Zeitgeist. We're at The Daily Zeitgeist on Instagram. We have a Facebook fan page and a website, DailyZeitgeist.com, where we post our episodes and our footnotes. We link off to the information that we talked about in today's episode, as well as the song we ride out on. Miles, what's that got to do with it?

This is another one from that Japanese band, Fishmans, that I was really digging. I kept listening to their music, and I liked it more and more. This song is called Baby Blue, and they've got a little reggae vibe to it. And shout out to the Zeitgang dude who made that Rasputin meme. Yeah. Because you did it. You done good because it looked great.

But, yes, this is called Baby Blue by Fishmans. All right. We're going to ride out on that. We will be back tomorrow because it is a daily podcast. We'll talk to you then. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Thank you. into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Gianna Pradenti. And I'm Jermaine Jackson-Gadson. We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts. There's a lot to figure out when you're just starting your career. That's where we come in. Think of us as your work besties you can turn to for advice.

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