The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Best of DLS: It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Fishmas

Episode Date: December 25, 2025

Merry Christmas! What better way to celebrate the holiday than with some of our favorite Christmas-themed moments from over the years? We kick it off with a pair of Back in My Days, and you know these... are from long ago because Greg Cote was still doing them. After that, we've got a plethora of gifts under the tree, including a Roy's Top 10, Dan welcoming LeBron back to Miami, Tom Izzo playing the accordion, and a song honoring the 1-15 Dolphins. So put on your favorite pair of Christmas pajamas and grab a glass of eggnog; it's time to celebrate the holiday the Le Batard Show way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 All right, kicking things off with Smyranoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number of vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smyranoff! Wow, you're on the money with Smyranoff. Chris, you know what goes great with Smyranoff? Yes, but I'm really talking about game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe. Smearnoff!
Starting point is 00:00:17 All right, here's the deal. Game day is everything. And that's exactly why your fit has to match the occasion. Smearov. Starting this December, Smyranoff is giving fans 21 and over the chance to score limited edition Smyranoff commission. Merchandise from some of today's top. creators, including Kayla Jones, Gavin Matthew, and Alelele Mae. Here's the kicker. One lucky fan will take home the grand prize. A trip to the biggest game
Starting point is 00:00:38 of the off season. Plus, one fan will win Alele May's one-of-one game day jacket. The merch will be dropped on select dates from December to January, 21, and it's all courtesy of what brand? That's right, Chris. Fans, 21 and over can head to Smyranoff Socialists to learn how to sign up, and don't forget to grab a bottle of Smyrnav vodka. Number 21 at your local retail. Smyrath. Please drink responsibly. Smirnoff. Number 21 vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume,
Starting point is 00:01:02 the Samaranoff Company, New York, New York. Please do not share with anybody under legal drinking aid. Smyrnaw. No purchase necessary must be legal U.S. resident 21 or older. Sweep steak starts 1215, 2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern and ends 1.23, 2026 at 11.59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website.
Starting point is 00:01:18 Coming off a losing fantasy week, that means you're one week closer to losing your league. That's stressful, which can lead to nighttime teeth grinding. Dentech wants to prevent teeth grinding and has raised the fantasy stakes with a once-in-a-lifetime punishment. Keep an eye out for the ultimate fantasy football punishment reveal at the NFL Pro Bowl
Starting point is 00:01:41 or on Dentec.com slash ultimate punishment. If you're still feeling fantasy stress, try a Dentech nighttime dental guard to protect your teeth. Available at all major retailers. Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right? Don't place parleyes on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is one when it hasn't hit triple zero. Always drink your Yeagermeister ice cold.
Starting point is 00:02:06 That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion. Everything else? Everything else. Wearing clean underwear every day. Well, that's just a personal decision. Brushing your teeth. Obviously smart, but not a rule.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Never pee pee on an electric fence. Okay, maybe there are two rules. But the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Yeagermeister must be drank ice cold. Or don't drink it at all. Damn, that's cold. Exactly. You're finally starting to get it.
Starting point is 00:02:32 Drink responsibly. Yeagermeister liqueur, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by mass Yeagermeister U.S., White Plains, New York. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stugats podcast. Merry Christmas. Merry Cremmer. Merry Chrysler. You haven't seen that video, the viral video, that girl. in like Merry Christmas in different ways.
Starting point is 00:02:59 It's hilarious. It sounds like one of those videos where someone has just gotten their wisdom teeth out. Merry Crabma. Based off the way that you just were saying all that. Okay, so this is the first time that we're like in theme a little bit here. We have actual like Christmas stuff for this Christmas episode. We have two different Greg Cody Christmas themed back in my days. Remember when he used to do back in my days?
Starting point is 00:03:22 That's wild. No, I don't actually. They're really good. That's the big thing. That's my big thing. takeaway from going back through all this stuff. Dad's a good writer. Yeah, he has one planned actually for the new year.
Starting point is 00:03:33 I'll spoiler alert. Like, actually, I've got one in his craw that he's actually going to write. He told me he's going to write it, so we'll see. I'm beyond excited to hear that, actually. Then we have a Christmas song from him. Roy's top 10. We have a Roy's top 12 days of Christmas. Oh, I love this.
Starting point is 00:03:51 For those of you who are like newer listeners that don't know Roy's top 10, Enjoy. Also, quick plug for the Greg Cody show. Go check out our holiday episode that came out earlier this week. Stu Gautz makes it appearance. The Greg Cody Show featuring Greg Cody. With. Bubble Watson released a Christmas song.
Starting point is 00:04:12 So that's in here. Why wouldn't he? Because why wouldn't he? It's a rap. Yeah. Bubble Watson wrapped on Christmas. And then these final few are really good things that the fans can get to enjoy here. I included Dan's Christmas welcome essay to LeBron in 2014 when the Cavs were coming back to face the heat for the first time since LeBron had left.
Starting point is 00:04:35 This is when Dan describes Miami as a mistress to LeBron. It's classic Dan writing in here. Actually, I remember being in college and hearing this and being like, this guy's a genius. I really did. I really loved it. Then we've got Tom Izzo playing the accordion. and you guys singing Christmas carols along with that. Oh, one of my all-time favorite bits and moments.
Starting point is 00:04:58 It's great. And then finally, he's like, I'm not singing? Yeah, it's, dude, try to get him to sing. It's gold. I'm listening back to it, it is, it's a lot of fun. It's a lot of fun. And, I mean, surprisingly great at the accordion. And, you know, Dan's like jukebox nature.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Hey, play another one. And you just, you know, he does. And finally, there is a Dolphins fan. who wrote a, like, 12 days of Christmas on the first day of Christmas, about the Dolphins 1 in 15 season. It is long. It is what Dan would now describe as too fat, and all of it is there.
Starting point is 00:05:39 Yes. So, enjoy. Let's get fat. And now it is time to take a trip down memory lane. Here's your guide. Greg Cody, we're back in my day. Christmas trends. They're all bad, folks.
Starting point is 00:06:05 We've let this time of year get away from us. I mean the entire holiday season, although here I'll focus on Christmas and Santa Claus, still the Mac Daddy of Winter. He knows you when you're sleeping. He also knows who you've been sleeping with, by the way. Whoa. Where was I?
Starting point is 00:06:21 Oh, yeah. Baby. Baby. baby. Why Christmas has gradually gotten worse? I won't repeat my rail against artificial trees except to say if your Christmas tree is not a living thing that you need to water every few days, guess what? You don't have a Christmas tree. I also won't repeat my rail about how present giving has devolved into an unimaginative exchange of gift cards. When was the last time you hand-carved somebody's gift out of a block of wood? Exactly. But I want to concentrate to
Starting point is 00:06:53 today on two new beefs about why Christmas is sledding breakless down a hill headed for hell. First, outdoor lighting. Greg Cody earns the outside look on his house. He's up on a ladder, claw, hammer, and his right mitt, pocket full of sharp tacks, inching along the roof lines, stringing lights. Stringing them old school, just like Norm Rockwell would have painted it. You know what short cutters are doing now? Sticking a single laser light in the ground, flipping a switch and watching a shower of thousands of lights bathe their house. These folks have not earned their outside look, and you know who knows it? Santa.
Starting point is 00:07:33 You ever stop to consider how your laser light could blind Santa or as reindeer as they flew overhead? You didn't, did you? Because it's all about you, isn't it? Does not the very phrase, Merry Christmas begin with me? Even worse than the laser light trend is the sad state of Christmas. Christmas songs. Christmas songs used to mean jingle bells and Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer,
Starting point is 00:07:58 or maybe White Christmas by Derbinger or Nat Cole crooning my nuts roasting on an open fire. Now, the old classics, the traditional songs the carolers would sing in harmony under wintry street lamps. Wait a minute. You can barely find those songs. Wait, wait a minute. I don't think the lyric is mine nuts. Is that what I said? Roasting on an open night.
Starting point is 00:08:24 That's a totally different song. Yeah, I misheard Nat King Cole's lyric on that. Mine nuts roasting on an open fire. Nuts roasting on an open fire. It seems horrible. It seems the opposite of Christmas. Well, you know, but again, it was a classic. Now, the old classics, the traditional songs, the carolers would sing in harmony under
Starting point is 00:08:47 wintry street lamps, you can barely find those songs played anymore. They've been elbowed off the air. by the awful and unwelcome oxymoron of modern Christmas songs by Mariah Carey in One Direction and every other artist trying to glom a fast buck with a bad holiday album. You come to my house this time of year, you'll see a real Christmas tree. Underneath it, you'll see gifts utterly unidentifiable because they've been poorly hand-carved from blocks of wood. And you'll see me splayed on the ground outside, writhing and screaming for help beside a fallen ladder, but unheard over the ear-splitting decibels of Perry Cobol's little drummer boy. I'm Greg Cody.
Starting point is 00:09:26 And that's how it does. Back in my day. Oh, happy holidays from the Dan Levatar show. And now it is time to take a trip down memory lane. Here's your guide, Greg Cody, with Back in My Day. The 262 is Milwaukee, Dan. Yeah, not a surprise. As good as simple as any for what's wrong with us as a nation,
Starting point is 00:09:51 is probably the artificial Christmas tree. These abominations are shipped and stored in large rectangular boxes, and inside these tree coffins has contained the death of the American spirit. Back in my day, we had artificial stuff, but we didn't flaunt it quite as much. I know that many of you listening may be a part of the fake tree cult. Please don't take this personally, but you put your friends and relatives in an awkward position by having people over for the holidays and unabashedly inviting your guests to fawn over your towering non-tree. Of course, you think it looks great because you paid over 300 bucks for it.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Guests will nod benignly at your gorgeous monstrosity, all the while privately mourning the laziness and self-delusion embodied in your decision to go fake. Would you serve a large plastic turkey and pretend eating it? So why would you present an artificial tree? It's an insult to Santa Claus and a pox on Jesus Christ. Don't get me wrong. I'm not against everything artificial. I use artificial sweetener in my coffee.
Starting point is 00:11:01 Also, I have no problem with people of need getting an artificial limb. We almost draw our line, though. The fake tree crowd are the same corner cutting people who buy machine-carved fake Halloween pumpkins because they can't be bothered getting a little creative with a knife and an actual pumpkin. So much is artificial. now. The guy in the store is wearing a bizarre toupee and everybody has to pretend they don't notice. Same with
Starting point is 00:11:26 a woman whose obvious fake breasts look like giant flotation devices. Did you know you can now drive a 3D printed car? This isn't even the sound of my real voice. It's computer generated. My war against fake Christmas trees is deep seated.
Starting point is 00:11:41 Way back in the day, one of my earliest childhood memories is my folks having a silver Christmas tree that had an oscillating color wheel at the base of it, affecting an insane psychedelic rainbow. I imagined other people having a nice Norman Rockwell Christmas while I was being mind-blown by a hallucinogenic dripping tree out of a Salvador dolly painting. I vowed then to never, ever have an artificial Christmas tree and invite you to make the same
Starting point is 00:12:09 pledge. Wow. I'd further suggest setting on fire any artificial tree you come across, but I've learned from sad experience that most of those damn things are flame retardant, not for safety. reasons, but because the manufacturers rightly anticipated my leading an angry public backlash. I'm Greg Cody, and
Starting point is 00:12:28 that's how it was back in my day. Wow. She saved us, man. I mean, I've never heard the phrase of Pox on Jesus Christ. I have never heard that phrase ever uttered. Got a patent on it. Critics are calling
Starting point is 00:12:44 Marty Supreme a full throttle masterpiece and the best movie of the year. I couldn't be more excited to see this one. That's got my boy, Timothy Shalame, from A-24 and starring Timothy Shalame, alongside Powerhouse cast, Gwyneth Paltrow, Odessa O'Zion, and Tyler Accoma. Marty Supreme, now playing only in theaters. It's a holiday season and the 50th anniversary of Miller Light. The holiday is all about spending time with friends and family, launch a sit back, and toast a few Miller Lights.
Starting point is 00:13:19 Make your holiday time, Tis Miller Time. And with the 50th anniversary of Miller Light, you get to remember and reflect on all the good times that you had with your trusty buddy by your side, Miller Light. Brood for flavor with simple ingredients like malted barley, rich, balanced toffee notes, and that iconic golden color. And at 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces, it lets you enjoy the season without weighing you down.
Starting point is 00:13:41 The original light beer since 1975 and still hit indifferent 50 years later. The best holiday beers are the ones you don't expect. Miller Light. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tis Miller Time! Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories,
Starting point is 00:14:04 and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Quick break to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan Levitard show. Game time. The NFL regular season is already winding down, and this is when the games get really good. Good. And tickets are in high demand. Some of them really difficult to find. So why don't you take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with the game time app? I use it all the time because it
Starting point is 00:14:30 gives me the advantage. That's right. Sports fans, take the power back. It's the hack for grabbing amazing tickets in just a couple of taps. Super easy, super reliable. And with a game time guarantee, you're getting 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus, fees are included. What you see is what you pay. Do yourself a favor. Open up. the Game Time app right now. You'll see tons of seats available, lowerball, midfield, upper deck, and NFL tickets starting at around $100 bucks. Pick what you want.
Starting point is 00:14:57 Tap, tap, done. Take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code Dan for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply, again. Create an account and redeem code D-A-N for $20 off. Swipe, tap, ticket,
Starting point is 00:15:13 go. Download the GameTime app today. Don Lebertard. Stugat him 25 and 2 Oh, there's a brand new kid in town Out of BYU Stugats They call him Puka Pooka Nakuwa
Starting point is 00:15:30 His quarterback is not named Tua Yeah And he is Pooka Puka Naku This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugats It's beginning to look a lot like Fishmas. Everywhere you go.
Starting point is 00:16:03 Take a look at five winds in a row. Fins are glistening once again with big defense and two of stats all the glow. Yes, it's beginning to look a lot like Fishmas. another TD for you But the prettiest sight to see Is the merriment that will be As we party like it's Nineteen72
Starting point is 00:16:29 A pair of quarterback sacks and a diving pick The wish of girlfriends and boys And to a don't god'll just throw it to wattle We'll all be dancing with joy Oh, it's beginning to look a lot like fishmess. Everywhere you go, we're making angels in the snow. There's my columns on the great Cody show.
Starting point is 00:17:00 It's a fest of John of nonstop, ho, ho, ho. So it's beginning to look a lot like fishmas. But sitting on Santa's lap, I don't need a new set of gloves. or anything with a bow. Hey, fat man, just bring me four more wins in a row. That kind of thing. Time now for Roy's top ten list. It's been a while.
Starting point is 00:17:38 It's been a while, yeah. It's been a while. Roy's top ten list. Rusty at this day. These are Roy's top ten holiday season. Songs and Stories. Okay. Top 10 holiday songs and holiday stories.
Starting point is 00:17:54 You got nothing on your list over there. I have number four. Number 10, Roy. I'm dreaming of a white woman. If that is number 10, this is going to be a dizzy. Holy believe how good is this list? There can't be nine better. There can't be nine better than that.
Starting point is 00:18:21 He sang it. He sang it. And this is the first time you've had commentary. And well, he sang it. I think we need to just end right there. Let's stop right there. Is it possible? This is unprecedented in the history of Roy's top ten.
Starting point is 00:18:35 Can I hear number 10 again? It can't go up. It can't go up from there. It cannot possibly go up from there. That is the best you can do, Roy. Number nine, Roy. and around the Christmas tree, Rollins.
Starting point is 00:18:51 I'll be stuck on 10 for the remainder of the list. Number eight. Rudolph, the black nose reindeer. Oh, I had it. You had that, you had that? I thought I had that number four.
Starting point is 00:19:06 Yeah, you had it. You had it number four. I pushed it up a little bit, but I wanted to... Do you know how lame number eight is compared to number 10? But I had him. Well, I'm lame.
Starting point is 00:19:18 Number seven. The grins that stole my tires. You can get that one right there. Do I get it? Just making sure you're in the loop on this. Number six. Chocolate frosty, the snowman. Number five.
Starting point is 00:19:36 Ten needed to be two. Jinglebone rock rains. You leave a rock range. A rock range reference. Tim rains. reference. Why am I writing them down? I don't know why you're writing them down.
Starting point is 00:19:49 Number four, Roy. Santa Claus is coming to Overtown. Okay. Yeah, that's pretty good right there. There was one better than ten. No, I don't know. It wasn't better than ten. It was pretty good, though.
Starting point is 00:20:08 He sang number ten. Number three. Morris chestnut roasting over an open fire. Whatever. An open friar? Irvin Friar. Irvin Friar. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:20:21 Okay. Well, now it's one. Okay. Get the marbles out of your mouth. Number two. Jingle bells, Bev de Beau. And Roy's number one, top ten holiday song or story. Let us know.
Starting point is 00:20:39 Let a J.T. snow. Roy. Roy. I don't want to ever tell Roy how to do this list, ever, because I think they're really, it's, whenever he does it, we get this amazing reaction to it. But do you agree with me on this? I don't want to ever tell him how to do it.
Starting point is 00:20:59 But 10 should have been two, right? I don't know. I'm sure there's a reason that he went there. They probably wanted him to come out of the box. That's the most difficult. That was the degree of difficulty, one. Give him some confidence going down the list. I just touched down on my hug grab
Starting point is 00:21:16 I bet you want to know what's in my bag Is it golf clubs or a bag of toys It's a bird, it's the plane, it's a bug car I remember Christmas growing up in Baghdad Chill in the living room with my dad Mama in the kitchen got food in the stove Sister in the living room playing on the floor I used to hit the golf course, take me a swing.
Starting point is 00:21:47 Got my first club since boy was a team. Kids in their room, they can't even go to sleep. Because they know I'm coming through putting gifts or the tree. No, no splight, no beard, no reindeer. I might come deliver gifts on a John Dirk. Katie asked me to bring him a new bar. I drank him a new ball, but I'm checking my list it's Bubba Claw. I just touched down on my hub craft.
Starting point is 00:22:22 I bet you want to know what's in my bag. Is it golf clubs got a bag of toy? This bird is playing this bunk called. I got to thank God he's the reason I made it. I thank him every day for the moves that I make. Thank you, baby Jesus. He was born in the main. Because he knew when I was born I was going to need to save it.
Starting point is 00:22:48 Thank you for my clothes and the shoes on my feet. Thank you for my kids and the food that they eat. Thank you for my wife in the house that we sleep. I wake up every day and I'll put it on repeat. I just touched down on my hub graph. I bet you want to know what's in my bag is in golf clubs right bag of toys this bird is the bird is to playing this bug call
Starting point is 00:23:20 I just touched down on my hub crab I bet you want to know what's in my bag is in golf clubs my bag of toys this bird is the plane this bug call Miami was the mistress, and the four-year-year-finging came with sparks and emotion and jewelry. But then LeBron James went back home to his original love, and that'll leave even a city of tourists and transport. plans feeling cheap and rented.
Starting point is 00:24:11 Rationally, this is silly, of course. Rationally, Miami knows it lost LeBron exactly the same way it got him. Rationally, he fulfilled the terms of his Miami contract. But the best parts of sports don't reside in the rational. There are no good and happy endings in transactions like this. There are only endings. And so Miami is allowed to feel conflicted, jilted but grateful, bejeweled, but befuddled, fulfilled, yet somehow empty.
Starting point is 00:24:36 And, of course, longing, because you could see. how anyone can confuse four years of crazy, crazy passion with true love. You can't help but miss something that intense, but there is not a consensus about how to feel about him now, not on the team and not in the city. Dwayne Wade still loves LeBron. Pat Riley does not. So it'll be interesting to see how Miami fans react to his return. Will it be appreciative applause or hurt hissing?
Starting point is 00:25:01 Both probably. And those fans will be taking a cue from the team. will an organization run by a blindsided Riley even celebrate LeBron's return given that Riley expected the courtesy of a warning after championships plural you'll have to tune in to tell the rest of the country will think anything other than gratitude is very small but the rest of the country is applauding his return to Cleveland and all those syrupy going home commercials it has spawned a storyline that makes LeBron's basketball mistress feel kind of sick and kind of used that same rest of the country was
Starting point is 00:25:35 shredding LeBron for four straight years at a time that only Miami had his back as the waves of hate he brought lapped incessantly upon its shores. There was only one place that embraced him consistently those last four years, and it isn't the place that burned his jerseys when he left. There's never been a team in South Florida history that felt quite that us against the world, not even those renegade football hurricanes, and that created an instant and intense bond replaced now by nostalgia and longing. LeBron chose to break that bond built over four insane years
Starting point is 00:26:07 by going back to that original love. He got what he wanted in Miami. You'll forgive his basketball mistress if she feels a bit used and reminds him of it when she sees him again. Those jingle bells remind me that holiday basketball is here. And when stars like Kobe White, Jalen Williams, and Tyler Hero
Starting point is 00:26:26 start cooking, Ravking sportsbook, and official sports betting partner of the NBA is where you want to be. I'll keep singing that song when I do this read. I can't help it. But don't forget, Drap Kings has your back with early exit. If your player goes down in the first half,
Starting point is 00:26:43 you still get paid in cash. Is this true? This can't be, really? Oh my God. It's absolutely true. It's absolutely real. If your player goes down in the first half, you still get paid in cash.
Starting point is 00:26:54 Download the Drap King Sportsbook app and use code Dan. That's code. Dan, new customers can bet five bucks and get $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins. In partnership with Drive Kings, the crown is yours. Oh, yeah. Gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler. In New York, call 8778-8-Hope-N-Y or text Hope & Y 467-369.
Starting point is 00:27:16 In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boothill Casinoin Resort in Kansas, pass-through of per-wager tax may apply, in Illinois. 21 and over. Agent eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkng.com slash audio. Limited time offer. Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right? Don't place parlayes on multiple long shots.
Starting point is 00:27:48 Don't say a game is one when it hasn't hit triple zero. Always drink your Yeagermeister ice cold. That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion. Everything else? Everything else. Wearing clean underwear every day. Well, that's just a personal decision. Brushing your teeth? Obviously smart, but not a rule.
Starting point is 00:28:07 Never pee-pee on an electric fence. Okay, maybe there are two rules. But the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Yeagermeister must be drank ice cold. Or don't drink it at all. Damn, that's cold. Exactly. You're finally starting to get it.
Starting point is 00:28:20 Drink responsibly. Yagermeister liqueur 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mass Yeager Meister U.S. White Plains, New York. Don Lebatard. Is there back in my day? There is, actually. Are you not going to tell anyone? Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:28:37 You guys. Guys, it's a Tuesday. Stugats. Here's your guide. Greg Cody, with Back in My Day. I hope I heard. Okay, here it is. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:28:55 The Beltery. We are back. We're waiting for this one. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. We're here for one thing, and it's not to hear you talk, okay? I thought I got my SID going to hold the phone here while I'm trying to get ready. Judgment free, just do it, Coach. Judgment free.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Jingle Bells is the beginning of the concert. Let's go. All right, you ready? Yeah, yeah. Wait a second now I'm the wrong key That's all right, judgment free, coach, judgment free. I ain't singing.
Starting point is 00:29:46 You're the one singing. We want us to sing? Over the field we go Laughing all the way Oh, jingo bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride and a one horse is to ride and a one horse is to ride and a one horse soap and sleigh. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle
Starting point is 00:30:31 all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh. Yeah. I couldn't hear that you guys sound. Excellent. Yes, we were singing along and we want more. We want more. Let's go.
Starting point is 00:30:52 Listen and hear you sing, man. I can't wait for that quit filibustering let's go give me some silent night I'll go up on a rooftop no no no no no no no Christmas carol's not up in the rooftop not running that scam that you marry uci ran silent night please give us some silent night wait now do I have oh yeah I got silent night here I'll try I'm not as good at that so hold on all right that's okay it's okay that you're not good at it's okay it's holidays yeah An island, lovely night, all is calm, all is bright, round the virgin's mother and child,
Starting point is 00:31:50 Horny it's been so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heaven Yeah Legendary coach Tom Inzo of Michigan State Are you getting confidence? We're all with you here.
Starting point is 00:32:22 Joy to the world. Joy to the world. What do you got, Coach? You got some joy to the world in you. You're brutal, man. I'm going to get you something. Let's go. Coach, you're crushing it.
Starting point is 00:32:31 You're crushing it. You're killing it, coach. Let's go. She's going to be calling me. Tell me how bad I am. No, you're great on it. Let's go. Joy to the world.
Starting point is 00:32:41 All right. Yeah! Yeah! The earth receive her knee. Every heart repair him room. And heaven and nature sing. And heaven and nature sing. And heaven and nature sing.
Starting point is 00:33:19 shirt. Yeah! Yeah! Legendary, Coach. Tom Azo. Let's go. Let's keep it going. Deck the halls.
Starting point is 00:33:33 Let's go. Coach, what do you got? I didn't already give you deck the halls. Did you? No, you didn't do deck the halls. You did Silent Night, Jingle Bells, and Joy to the World. You don't want to pick those holes. Deck those halls.
Starting point is 00:33:45 Yes. Let's go. Deck them. We go. All right, I'm going to try it. All right, we'll get up top on a rooftop in a second. The malls with house of holly. La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La.
Starting point is 00:34:04 It's the season to be jolly. La La La La La La La La La La. Dawn, we now are gay apparel. La La La La La La La La La La La. Roll the ancient Yule Tide Carol La la la la la la la La la
Starting point is 00:34:24 Big finish Big finish coach Let's go Send them out wanting more Let's go up on a rooftop Let's go coach Send him out with your big finish Now
Starting point is 00:34:36 This is the closer Let's go Without Maryucci on my shoulder This is the closer This is the closer Very excited I love this coach This coach is the best
Starting point is 00:34:46 This is such good recruiting right here. If you buzz, out jumps good old Santa Claus, down through the chimney with lots of toys, all four little good girls and boys. Oh, ho, ho, who wouldn't go? Oh, who wouldn't go? Up on the house, stop, click, click, click. Down through the chimney with old St. Nick.
Starting point is 00:35:16 Now you know how he got Zach Randolph to go to school there! That is how he got Traymond Green to go to Michigan State right there, the closers. You know what? I did. I serenaded his mother. That's your good point. On the first week of the season, Cam Cameron gave to me a loss to the skins by three. On the second week of the season, Kim Cameron gave to me Two Tio touchdowns and the Cowboys kicking our bleep On the third week of the season, Kim Cameron gave to me Onside kicks a flailing, Trent Green a flailing, and the loss to the Jets by three.
Starting point is 00:36:00 On the fourth week of the season, Cam Cameron gave to me, Five Dante scores, four total fans, three passing yards, 23 and outs, and a loss to a really crappy team. On the fifth week of the season, Kemp Cameron gave to me, Trent Green is spearing, his brains a smearing, Jason Taylor tearing, one white D.B.
Starting point is 00:36:24 We might win. We got them, 10, no, a 58-yard field goal again, and a loss to another stinky team. On the six week of the season, Cameroon gave to me, Cleo Lemon leading, Marty Booker, bleeding all the fans of pleading,
Starting point is 00:36:39 Please start John Beck Tedgin drops No defensive stops Someone called the cops And a loss to another crappy team On the seventh week of the season Cam Cameron gave to me Randy Mosso leaping
Starting point is 00:36:56 Cameron wore out weeping Why are we so bleeping Terrible Six Brady scores We celebrate like whores Even though we're down by 44 And we're heading to London Oh and 7
Starting point is 00:37:09 On the ninth week of the season, Kim Cameron gave to me Thank God a bye A break from the crap We can watch the can't collapse I'd rather take a nap We are so gonna go and 16 On the 10th week of the season Cam Cameron gave to me
Starting point is 00:37:28 Hope that isn't true We're winning 10 to 2 Time to start playing like poo J.P. Lossman crushes our dreams Celebrating way too soon Our team is full of loons Joe Rose equals buffoon, and yep, you guessed it, a loss to another crappy team. On the 11th week of the season, Camp Cameron gave to me 10, Ginnett, a scoring offense, that's a boring.
Starting point is 00:37:51 They look like they're a touring circus act. Thanks for starting back, he didn't break his neck, a 14-yard loss, and fourth in goal, what the heck, and a 10th loss before Thanksgiving. On the 12th week of the season, Cam Cameron gave to me, Pittsburgh turf that's gooey, Ricky tore his booby, going for it on fourth and long as fooey, please attempt a flapping field goal. Everybody knows Derek Hagan blows. Big Ben made us look like hodes. If we don't beat the jets, we are done. On the 13th week of the season, Cam Cameron gave to me, touchdown dolphins against them,
Starting point is 00:38:31 touchdown dolphins against them, touchdown dolphins against them. Touchdown Dolphins against them Touchdown Dolphins against them Touchdown Dolphins against them Tack on a feely field goal And we got killed but the Jets suck too On the 14th week of the season Cam Cameron gave to me
Starting point is 00:38:48 Backwards is soaring Buffalo bills are scoring Dick Geron is boring Please bench John Beck 19 fumbles lost We can't even run a toss The ball is covered in frost Dick Joron's boring even when tasered
Starting point is 00:39:04 on the 15th week of the season Cam Cameron gave to me Well, it really wasn't Cam, it was more like a gift from Brian Billick Sam Congato running Cleo, Lemon Gunning Lots and lots of punting fourth quarter comeback choice Smith leaps them back Billick must be on crack
Starting point is 00:39:19 Bats over Mrs. Cam and Cleo kisses Who the hell is Dennis Camarillo The whole team A leaping, Wayne Heising a weeping Mandeach Encephalo sounded like they were bleeping Once again, thank you, Frady Cat, Billick. Between week 15 and week 16, Heisinga gave to me. A fatty with fake blonde hair, his body looks like a pair.
Starting point is 00:39:45 He could double as a polar bear. Leby hate parcels. The big tune is his name. He likes to hand out blame. It's been a decade since he's won a playoff game. Wayne had better stock his office with the bars. Quick break to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan Lebitard show, Game Time. The NFL regular season is already winding down.
Starting point is 00:40:11 And this is when the games get really good. And tickets are in high demand. Some of them really difficult to find. So why don't you take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with the game time app? I use it all the time because it gives me the advantage. That's right. Sports fans take the power back. It's the hack for grabbing amazing tickets in just a couple of taps.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Super easy. super reliable. And with a game time guarantee, you're getting 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus, fees are included. What you see is what you pay. Do yourself a favor. Open up the Game Time app right now. You'll see tons of seats available, lower bowl, midfield, upper deck, and NFL tickets starting at around 100 bucks. Pick what you want. Tap, tap, done. Take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with Game Time. Download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code Dan for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply again. account and redeem code D-A-N for $20 off. Swipe, tap, ticket, go. Download the GameTime app today.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.