The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Father Time Is On Joel Embiid's Ass | Postgame Show

Episode Date: April 30, 2026

"I would rather die." JuJu is disgusted by what the crew did with their ears, but that won't stop him from delivering a Joker of the Day, his Thursday Thunder picks, and some hot takes on tonight's NBA Playoffs. Plus, Dan has a theory about The Polls. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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It's Thursday Thunder, and it's presented by Draft Kings. Draft Kings, the Crown is your. George, Juju, what do we got? Yes, sir, man. Last Thursday, we was one away, man. One away. But this Thursday, we're taking it to the top, baby. First leg, man, I'm going with the New York Knicks minus two and a half.

What I saw from the Hawks, the game four, that felt like a little effort situation. And I don't know if they satisfied with what they got so far. I know that I saw the look in the Knicks eyes, though. So I'm going with the Knicks minus two and a half. Next leg, I'm going with Quentin Grimes of the Sixers for eight points. My boy been aggressive and having them B back opens things up a lot, you dig it. But that's the second leg. Third leg and last leg, I'm going with Jordan Clarkston for six points tonight.

Prudham Nicks, you dig it. My boy be stepping up, man. McCall Bridges, APB out for him. Look out for him. Jordan Kleistin. Before we get to the polls and all the stuff we want to talk about, Juju, do you have any opinions on Roy and what we found in his ear today? Terrible. Were you surprised that Zaslo had a clean ear, Roy had a dirty ear, and we are judging Roy as a dirty-eared person?

Yeah, I think that's something fair. I feel that might be under the hip-a-violations. I think we're supposed to cheer Roy Young for being brave, brave enough to show us what's in his. Cheer the ear. Cheer for myself. Thank you, Roy. Appreciate that. Juju, always giving off positivity, even when it is not merited in any way whatsoever.

I deserve it. I don't feel like you do in this instance. You had some bravery, but you had a dirtier ear than anyone expected. After, surprisingly, Zaz had a totally clean one. Yeah, well, you introduced Pitchcock a couple of minutes ago, so there's that. Not the first time I have done that. One of our favorite bits, actually. Before we get to the polls here, what do we have on the Sixers?

I know that you've been following them because they are challenging your Boston Celtics. I don't know what your opinions are on Joel Embed. Yeah, I mean, I think I want to go out on a limb. And of course, I have Celtics fandom, but I call myself an NBA analyst. So what I'm seeing from the Sixers right now, brough, if Joel Embed can get give you 29 minutes like the other night because that was the most impressive stat to me. He got you the points. He got to the rebounds.

He got you 29 minutes of him the other night. And that changes the entire east. I think that him being back and healthy, it opens VJ. It opens a maxi. Grimes is so aggressive Thursday Thunder lock him in. He's so aggressive. PG-13, that entire team takes on a different person. with him on the court.

And I want to go out on the limb and say, bro, he might put them in the championship conversation because look at that east right now. No matter what, you got to remember it. In the Eastern Conference finals, there are going to be raptors or there are going to be magic or pistons, but that's a piece of cake. So look out for them damn sixers, man. They're going to make some noise. Or calves.

That limb is flimsy. You're out there by yourself on that limb. There ain't nobody with you there. Right, bro. Look at Joelle and B, bro. Also, the first half, they made him in-game adjustment. I think he was like 0 for four from three in the first half. That's what people want you to do, Joel.

Second half, he didn't shoot no threes, all paintwork. And that's the most dangerous version of him. And his clock is not, five of the time is around a cone on his ass, basically. So he got to do it right now. Based off what was going on earlier in the show, Juju, I do have a quick top five things that are more ridiculous to be afraid of than Q-Tips. Oh, man. So number five, D-E-I. Number four, trans people.

Number three, female empowerment. Number two, intimacy. And number one, commitment. Put it on the poll, Juju at Lebitard show. Is Father Time indeed around the corner on Joelle and Beed's ass at Levitard show? Because I don't think it is yet. Is he fast? Is Father Time fast?

I don't think of Father Time. I think... So it takes him a while to get there. You know what I mean? Like, you've got a couple years. And all of a sudden it's like, oh, he's here. But it's like, well, was he running fast or was he running slow the whole time? I didn't think...

I didn't feel like Father Time was the one change. racing Joel Embed. I thought it was just general medical status. I don't think we've done how old is he? He's not that old, right? It just feels like his dog. 22. Man, he's 19 years old. Jason Tatum. At Levitart show is how you vote on the polls. Can we have a Joker of the day? Do you have one of those for us today? Oh man. I'm not sure how you know the internet you be seeing something. I'm like, I don't believe it. But I've done saw this enough. Boston Magazine, brer. They put on cover of the 150 most influential Bostonians

of 2006, Mike Vrable and Drake May, bro. Y'all could have edited that photo through Missoula or somebody on the cover or just Drake May. I don't know. But y'all are some jokers for that one. Yeah, could have been literally anybody else.

At Lebitard show is where you vote on the polls. What do we have in the way of updates today? It felt like we had a lot of them today. I also think you should put on the poll. Do you know it's a good show when you have a lot of polls because I do feel pretty generally that there is a correlation here between how good the show is and how many polls we had. It felt like we had a lot today. Did we have a lot or did we just have one or two? Yeah, we had a lot, bro. Maybe like a billion, so I'm going to go

straight into them. And it's the first one is a doozy. Which is worse to do in public? Use a Q-tip, put lotion on, or floss. 68% of the audience says floss. Objection, Your Honor. Ooh. Was not floss. Floss stick. Hey, we got different poles to get to.

Hold your horses, my brother. Are you afraid of Q-tips? 80% of the audience says, no, they are not, Zas. Wow. I'm afraid. Breathe and stop. Do you think Stafford, do you think of Stafford as a lion or as a ram? 62% of the audience says lion. Damn.

Good. Which is more acceptable to use in public? A toothpick or a floss stick? 89% of the audience says a toothpick is more acceptable to use in public. Yeah. Tony? The floor. The floor is this. The floor is, nobody.

else in the room even knew that I had anything. Nobody was watching. Nobody had any idea because I was back there with Bat Riley making sure I had everything out. The only person watching me and watching my every move was Dan. Inexplicably watching everything I did. You were spraying chunks of remnants in people. Chunks! Chunks!

Okay. Okay. You're going to lie here in front of everybody. You're going to do that. You're going to do that. You said you turned your back and you covered your mouth and you did music of those things. I never said I covered my mouth. I did turn my back once to make sure that whatever was there nobody saw and nobody did

except you who were watching very closely anyway Zaz fell out of a chair don't worry about me. Seems like a disgusting thing to do in front of people. It seemed like it could have been done anywhere. Jujia would have never done it Jujia would have never done that in front of people, not mouth covered

not anything like that. I'd rather die Dan when you think of Roger Clemens what jersey is he wearing A Yankee jersey Red Sox jersey Blue Jays jersey or Astros jersey 53% of the audience says

A red socks jersey A blue Jays Hey man Richcott Should you approach a Q-tip the way you do a bear Close one 54% of the audience says no

Gotta be more careful Are we in an apocalyptic place When no one is talking about the mysterious dying of the scientists 94% of the audience says yes And 50% of the audience says I can't say apocalyptic It's a tough one Is there a more ridiculous thing to be afraid Then hold on

I can't read now. Is there a more ridiculous thing to be afraid of than a Q-tip? 58% of the audience says, no, there is not. Sorry for your list, Jeremy. And last poll, is Wimby indeed better than you? 91% of the audience says yes, and those are your polls. Thank you, Juju. Before we get out of here, because I am going to be gone for the next week.

I did want to throw to a little promo here of Neil Brennan on South Beach sessions with us. Before I do that, though, Juju, when are you starting up with Alleyoop doing live after playoff games? When is all of that starting for Alliup for you and Trista? Yes, sir, the semifinals, the Eastern and Western semifinals, which is right around the corner. We're going to crank this baby up, man. We got a lot of guests, a lot of fun guests, man. We usually don't have a guest on the Alliute, which is rare. So we're going to turn that thing around and make it more fun, man, for the playoffs.

And so thank you for that, Juju. you. As I was mentioning, Neil Brennan Chappelle's show, he is somebody who has a lot of history with our show. We talk to creators of things on South Beach sessions, and he's usually pretty good on sports as well. I don't know what he's saying in this clip. Do you know what he's saying in this clip, Chris Cody? Do you know? I know. I know. Let's let the audience. I don't want to ruin it for the audience. You don't want to ruin it for the audience. That's good promotion by you in comedy. And you're a beast because you care about it like that. You can. about it the most obsessively because I have I cannot I will die it's like it's the thing that I

don't think you journalists understand about Kevin Durant he doesn't give a fuck about anything but basketball he doesn't even know he doesn't think about anything else to like Twitter but that's all basketball it's all anger at people for not understanding basketball. And he does not, if he plays video games, I promise you it's 2K. He's watching basketball. He doesn't have any other. Most of these guys are not interesting people because they don't care about anything but

basketball. And if you talk to basketball players, they talk about Kevin Durant like they're not in the NBA. They talk on them like, yeah. I talked to Brunson about it. He was just like, it's like, yeah, even in our level where you're like, whoo,

because he doesn't care about anything. And that's the thing with all these other with, with Shaq and all these guys that like had all these other inches, like, yo man, Shaq, you might have gotten injured if you played more. But if you were, if you stayed 290 or three,

I don't know what the good weight was and didn't rap or act or you would have scored, you would have 40, 20, 10. I have said the people in my crew get mad at me when I say Shaq underachieved. You see him in person. And if you had to just, you see him in person, first of all, the first instinct is to run. Because he's so big. Blake, what Blake driven one time. My dog, a pit bull, saw Blake in a parking lot and backed up.

I've never seen a. He was like, When did they start making people this big? I've never, this is a scale. I, so, so yeah, so if you've never seen your pit bull. A pit bull backed up to Blake in like a nice brunch outfit, not even tough looking. So these, so it comes down to I don't care about anything else.