The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: 50 Hawks, 10 Crocs, 3 Brown Bears, 15 Wolves, A Hunter with a Rifle, 7 Buffalo, 10K Rats, 5 Gorillas, and 4 Lions (feat. Ron Magill)

Episode Date: April 29, 2025

Amin Elhassan's Weekend Observations lead us to Chris Cote's experience with the garter toss, which concerns the rest of the crew. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Cuervo Cuervo The tequila that invented tequila. Proximo, Cuervo.com, please drink responsibly. Cuervo.com. Please drink responsibly. Cuervo. This is the Dan LeVittor Show with the Stugats Podcast. It is time for Stugats to share his game notes. No one in the media will tell you what happened better than my boy Stu.

Dan? Wait a minute. No one in the media will tell you what happened better than my boy Stu. Dan? Wait a minute. We're gonna do this to Lameen again, where we're putting him in the bad spot of Andrew Santino is watching and he has to do his weekend observations. Is Andrew Santino watching right now? At home, perhaps, because this is live and we're putting you in the position to perform Stu Gatz's bit. I want to give a little look behind the scenes here. Last week Santino came on with us, did great improv. He was so good at improv, he actually didn't even hear, but he could just see what was going on

and then we went to him as if he heard and he made it seem like, I'm telling you, Lewis told me after that interview, he didn't even hear weekend observations, but he was still so good on his feet that he able, none of us noticed. He is the yes and king, and I tried to do yes and the next day, and everyone stared at me like,

what do you mean, like an elephant? It was the worst improv ever, and I felt so ashamed. He seems like someone that watches, right, Andrew Santino? Yeah, he does. He's a sports guy, he does like sports. Bobby, not so much, But Santino, yes. Alright. Dan, weekend observations presented by Miller Lite. Dan, this league was made for these moments.

Tim Hardaway getting hit on the arm. Luka Dantjic getting tripped. And referees swallowing their whistle in the biggest moments, only to then come out after the game in the two minute report to say, whoops, our bad, and Dan, just like that, make no mistake about it, the NBA games getting ruined by officiating are back. It is crazy, we've already had a couple of our bad

at the end of the game the whole series was decided by our bad. Nothing says Nick's Pistons playoffs like a 94-93 rock fight. JB Bickerstaff leads the league in bickering. You can't spell JB Bickerstaff without bicker. That's true. Does no one else think it's weird that a coach for another team, in this case Chauncey Billups, was sitting front row cheering for a team he doesn't coach? That's true. Does no one else think it's weird that a coach for another team, in this case Chauncey Billups, was sitting front row cheering for a team he doesn't coach? That's a good point. Good observation. Also a good observation by you that Bicker staff begins with Bicker.

Yep. The Pistons wanting a physical game, only to then complain about not getting foul calls. You know what they say, you can't have your cake and eat it too. Or the Stugatsa strong in the pistons either or. I did not think we would see a more pathetic game than game one of OKC Memphis. But congratulations Miami Heat, you did it. The H in Miami Heat stands for how embarrassing.

That 3% chance at Cooper flag doesn't sound too bad right now. That's right. Jeremy talking about the Heat. Lipstick on a pig. Tyler Hero saying we're not going down 4-0. Hey Tyler, think again. And while you're at it, enjoy Cancun.

Big 5-0 run by Miami to close the game though. To keep him under 60. Do we have that Whittingham, do we have the Whittingham betting slip that we were promising from earlier because it is hard to find this. A live bet he made on the Miami Heat plus 57 and a half. You know what they say, good teams win.

Plus juice. You can get that at. Whoa. I told him frame that. That is a work of art right there. Can we fax that to the Heat front office? Just fax it. I want old wax paper being faxed of that betting slip.

Hey Mike, nobody beats the Heat by 60 on their home court in the playoffs. Nobody. Culture. For anybody who thinks going in the fifth round will humble Shadoura Sanders, must not know who Shadoura Sanders is. I don't know what's worse for Shadoura Sanders, falling know who Shadoura Sanders is.

I don't know what's worse for Shadoura Sanders, falling in the draft or still somehow ending up on the Browns. Cleveland Browns drafting two quarterbacks. You know what they say, if you draft two quarterbacks, you drafted none. The Browns have Kenny Pickett, Deshaun Watson, Shadoura Sanders and Dinnan Gabriel.

All for Joe Flacco to remind them, who's who, Joe Cool. Blue Jays pitcher, Kevin Gosman, getting ejected, and then tripping down the stairs, insult to injury. Why doesn't that happen more often? I guess people do trip downstairs. Dan, you know what Nas Reid does for the Timberwolves? Hits big threes? He does it all. There are some nights where if you didn't know any better, you'd assume Nas Reed was the best player in NBA history.

Nas Reed or Al Horford, chop for your life. I saw Al Horford the other day dive into the stands for no good reason, just to do it at 37. Mike, why was there a Nas Reed banner hanging at WrestleMania? You saw that, right? Because he's Nas Reed. He deserves it. He's great. I know you think that that's where this Venn diagram meets,

but I actually don't follow basketball. Zazz, I'll tell you why. Because there's some nights, if you didn't know any better, you'd assume Nas Reed was the best player in NBA history. Every time I do watch the T-Wolves secretly, like, he's a good player, right? Like, he's really good.

He's young Al Horford. He's impactful. He's young Al Horford, I'm telling you. Let's see. Travis Hunter, the rare first round pick that feels like your team is getting two first round picks. Congratulations to our engineer, Daniel Gonzalez Quevedo. That's his name?

On his wedding this past weekend, Danny GQ. Everybody calls him GQ. We had an office wedding around here. Billy, do you have any opinions on office weddings? How do you feel about this? How do I feel about office weddings? I think Danny GQ's a very nice guy and he did a thing where he put his save to date

on the fridge and he said if anyone wants to come, let me know and I think that it was a nice gesture and then about 40 people from the office showed up and I don't think that that's what the intention was. I think I felt bad because I saw everybody bonding and having a good time and he's such a nice guy that he's like yeah, of course I want everyone to go but I've had a wedding.

I know it's pricey and from what I's like, yeah, of course I want everyone to go, but I've had a wedding. I know, it's pricey. And from what I hear, it was two tables of coworkers. No way. That's a lot. That's too much. That's a lot of people. Sometimes you just say, you know what? I love you, I hope you have a magical day.

I know you don't actually want me there. It's just an added expense. I hope everyone has a great time. Billy, you know what they say? When you have two tables of coworkers, you don't have any That was supportive though. That was loving a loving gesture to celebrate love. I love love I mean, but also like with this crew they'll go anywhere. There's an open bar Yeah, look at that dangerous nights crew. I think if I think with this crew if you said guys and

At times you're going to hell with ourryles, but there's an open bar. Half of them would sign up for it. An eternity in hell with an open bar? They'd sign up, not a doubt in my mind. So you're saying you cannot make an open invitation to people in this office and not expect to get really hurt on the bill is what you're saying? Well, I mean, it's an open bar.

You pay for it on the front end. You know, to pay for for plate and then plus one situation It's not like they didn't bring gifts to table the gifts that gives game is always a situation where like you start doing a thing We're like well I know what this costs and you know plus mine is here on the value of this you know George Foreman grill I can get this for like $79 it cost me 200 to feed you and your plus one here. I don't know that we're breaking even, Jack.

R.I.P. George Foreman. Yeah, man. So, to GQ. On behalf of Dan. Blank check. On behalf of me. You're welcome. In honor of GQ's wedding,

top five athletes and entertainers who can note a wedding. OLI. Darius Garland. OLI, Usher. OLI, Chapelrone. Number five, Derek Favors. What did I miss on Darius Garland? Is it Garland something?

It's a, what is a Garland? Forgive me, I don't know what a Garland is. Maybe it's a Darius. Is it a Darius thing? What is the joke on Darius Garland something, it's a, what is a garland? Forgive me, I don't know what a garland is. Maybe it's a Darius. Is it a Darius thing? What is the joke on Darius Garland? Garland is a wreath of flowers and leaves worn on the head or hung as a decoration. What's a Darius?

I love love. That's a good question. Austin Cintric got one of those. What's the thing that's around like the thigh? Ooh, where you know the garter belt. Yes, it's not Darius garter belt. It's it's close though oh you're not talking about a garter belt you're talking about the thing that's tossed no that's a bouquet that's dearest bouquet you also toss a garter belt yes you do I had a teacher Ed Garland that's

interesting he's a harness racer no thank you more information and we really get to enjoy the tapestry layers of an onion. Yes, just crazy where that story ended I've always tried to avoid catching the thing at a wedding cuz I don't want the uncomfortable like like now you're doing a thing with Some woman you barely know where you're like reaching up her leg It's just like that's Greg Cody's humor to just have a name and say I had a teacher had that name and go off One part thing place Greg also harness racer one time have a name and say I had a teacher who had that name and go off longer into an uninteresting place. Greg also harnessed racer one time. You can't save it. You can't save that you had a teacher named Ed Garland and it contributed nothing to the conversation. In fact, while I'm at it.

Minor penalty, two minutes for adding nothing. I had a teacher named Dan Garland. Useless, I don't care. Nobody cares. I believe you wanted more. You're not getting more about Paul D. Garland. I don't want more. He was a harness racer.

What is that? I'm not telling you about popping apart. Not gonna get it. Dan, I think you kind of steamrolled something else that happened, where Chris said, I've never liked the garter belt thing. I don't want to reach up on a strange woman.

I don't like this thing at weddings. I don't like it either. Chris. No, it's not. It's whoever catches the bouquet and the person who catches the thing that the guy throws. Then all of a sudden you're like, you guys, have you ever been to a wedding before? I have not had this experience at a wedding. No, I've never reached up someone else's leg. No, that's not true. The way he initially described it is that the strange woman is his wife. It's not a strange woman that you're rubbing up a leg on.

The wife sits down and the groom then gets the quarterpels. Then there's the extra stuff with the bridesmaids. The bouquet is like if you catch that you're the next to get married. And then the lady Then the guy flicks something. There's like a man catches Have you ever been to a wedding how is this worse on Eddie Gore No, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna leave Chris alone on this I believe that he's right that are two different things. There's the throwing of the bouquet over the shoulder, and that's the next alleged bridesmaid

that will get married. And then there is also something with the garter, and the garter being thrown. I've just been at weddings where all of a sudden, like a random guy at the wedding is like crawling up the floor of like one of the bridesmaids who caught the bouquet. I mean, maybe that's a wedding in prison

That I guess that's a dealer's choice But just to be clear the strange woman whose leg you were creeping up on to get your wife. That was your wife Yeah, man. I didn't do that in my like as I said, I don't like that. I have my wedding. I'm like, we're not doing Slingshot motion like you've done it before. It seemed like you sling-shotted some garter. Actually, you know what? Now that I think back, I think they did the thing where I was blindfolded, and then they replaced my wife with one of my groom's bedding. It was a strange woman.

And all of a sudden, I grabbed my buddy's leg, and I'm like, this is not my wife's leg. So that is a very personal story. Number four. Number four. Just this hairy leg he's peeling off to get a quarter of health. Good gag. Good gag. This doesn't happen to everyone. Somebody who looks like DJ Khaled.

Number four. Franco Harris. The Immaculate Reception. Number three, Jonas Ido. Number two, Jonah Bride. Number one, Michael Jordan. I love making an appearance here somewhere. Brings. Former Marlin Jonah Bride, huh? Yeah, I'm digging deep today. Michael Jordan Would make an appearance here somewhere brings

Arlen Jonah bride, huh? Yeah, I'm thinking deep today Hey, don't look now here come the rays If the NFL draft was based on names and names alone a quarterback named Jackson Dark would go first overall Every time that's correct Sean Payton telling NFL teams. they should beware of snubbing Shadurah Sanders while also not drafting Shadurah Sanders. Sean Payton, the Stugats is strong in you. How long do you think before Shadurah Sanders can recite all 143 players drafted before him?

You gotta have it down by now, right? No. No? No, that's a lot. 143 is too many to memorize in just a couple of days. I don't know, man. What else has he been doing? 143 is too many.

Put it on the poll, JujuatLevitarShow. Could you memorize 143 names in two days? Dan. That didn't sound right. Let me do that again. Dan. That didn't sound right. Let me do that again. Dan, do you know what this Clippers Nugget Series has? It has everything. A little bit of everything.

A little bit of everything. Good job. The last time the Pistons won a home playoff game, I was a video coordinator, George W. Bush was president, and Apple hadn't opened the app store yet. Hey, NFL D NFL draft picks. Can we stop trying to wear retired jersey numbers? They're retired get over it Pick a new number and build your own legacy That's right good on LT for telling him to f off no No, but he said I'll be back behind you every two steps. I'll be two steps behind you every step of the way.

How do we feel about the Warren Moon, Kim Ward thing? They brought Warren Moon out to hand it over, which I guess is a nice touch. And also, a bit of context, Warren Moon never played in Tennessee. Yeah, I thought that was weird. An oiler. Huge update for Chris.

Apparently, according to MasterClass.com, which is teaching about the garter toss, sometimes indeed the groomsmen who catches the garter will place it on the bridesmaid who caught the bouquet. That's the next step. That's all I was saying, guys. I've seen that happen before. Sometimes.

Back off. Never seen it. But that's good. But apparently it's a thing. That's good if you're single and horny. That's why I always feel uncomfortable by it. It depends on who catches it. If you remember, I started by saying I don't like that.

Cause it's like all of a sudden, I'm like, oh, I don't know this woman. Respectful. And because she caught the bouquet, I'm now like, my wife's over, sorry honey, I'm gonna go climb up this lady's dress. A feminist. But that's why it's optional. See, like, I once caught the garter belt

when I was eight years old. Like, you leave it as an optional thing. Hey, Cleveland Browns. Hard knocks. Collision course. There's nothing more insulting in sports than calling the last pick of the draft Mr. Irrelevant. Rock Purdy. When Todd McShade talks NFL Draft, you know what you do, Dan.

You listen. I felt bad for Dylan Gabriel. It wasn't until he got picked that everyone finally went, what the hell is going on? Speaking of hell, our bribes. Dan, those are the weekend observations. Excellent work, Amin. Diana was right on the George Kittle contract.

He assigned an extension for 40 million guaranteed. Diana Rossini's information is as good as anybody's. I wanted to ask the group here, Jaylen Hurts sat out the White House, but Saquon went to the White House at a side-picking time. People can talk about unity, talk about sports. Saquon Barkley making a decision during a very popular time for Saquon Barkley to go to a White House that has been dividing the country. What are you looking at me like that for? I don't think it's the White House visit

so much as the hell yeah, I'm gonna go golf with Trump. He had like a tweet that was doubling and tripling down. He did more than the White House. He hung out with him the day before. I think they started a round of golf. He flew on Marine One with him, and then they had the White House the next day. And then they had lunch, there was photos together.

So people were not happy with the level of palling around he seemed to be doing. Right, I think the White House visit, for the most part, I know people on, you know, different types of history skipped it because of political differences. But for the most part, I think people are accepting, hey, when you win a championship,

the tradition is you go to White House, you meet the president, you take your picture with him. But also no one says we're going to meet the president. They say we're going to the White House. To the White House, yeah. It's the extracurricular itinerary around the White House trip that I think everyone's going nuts about.

And the tweet that we have on the screen right now where he's doubling and tripling down on it. And I would just tell people who tire of politics with their sports that what is happening presently in this country as you get offenses after offenses that it's just reporting, that the Patriots plane is deporting people and we're arresting immigration judges and we're doing stuff that when sports

is used to sanitize power and a presidency I will just tell you that that is something that my grandparents and my parents talked about from cuban times on how it is that freedom gets threatened by propaganda misinformation and somebody who doesn't know he's being used as a tool because he's a super bowl champion being used as a tool without realizing he's being used as a tool when the white house sends out the pictures to sanitize what is a laundering of freedom that no american should be okay with then it's not unlike the whole Saudi Arabia live golfing or Cut her with the World Cup where everyone was Clutching pearls of how can we allow them to use sports to kind of sanitize their image and what do you think they learned it?

It's the same thing But that's been normalized and now this will be normalized as we talk third terms on a presidency like you're I Think it's clear to all that if in sports you make some choices to hobnob with this particular power You are selling a piece of your soul. Can I throw this out there by the way as we speak about third term presidencies? I feel like the Republicans are opening a box they don't wanna open. Because who was the main guy, who was like, oh, I wish I could have voted for him a third time.

You open that third term, guess what? Now all of a sudden, the Democrats don't have a leadership issue. They don't have, oh, who's our guy? Barry, come back in, puts on the cape, saves America again. Oh, no, it'll be tied to the 2020 election. See, look at that, it wasn't, like,

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Don LeBretard! Bad news for opposing teams in the triple A. Stugats. These are smiles, till the broads are clutch again. Clutch again. Clutch again. This is the Dan LeBattar Show with the Stugats. Ron McGill is joining us now. He has avoided politics. People here locally have tried to get him to do some things that he would obviously win, but he does not want in this dirty game.

So we'll just talk about the animals with him and the conversation that the internet has been having the last few days, Ron. We've been having a forum with you for many years. We need to make a correction. This Patriot story is from 2022. That's a different administration. Okay, my bad. Separating different administration. Okay, my bad.

Separating the internet. Okay, my bad. That's a fine, right? Yes, that's gotta be a big fine, obviously. Yes, I hadn't seen that story. Thank you, Billy, for doing the research on that. Yes, thank you, Billy. Can I ask you, Ron,

have a lot of people been asking you about that, 100 people versus a gorilla? Yeah, I just did an interview with Rolling Stone Magazine about it. Excuse me. Wow. Okay. Look at me move.

Oh, wait a minute, I just asked him, though is that fair to do to him? Yes, it is because we asked him, have a lot of people been asking you about that? He could have just said, yeah, a lot of people, I just did an interview, but he said, I did an interview with Rolling Stone Magazine, ever heard of it?

Is that what he did? That's what he did. Yeah, I what he did you didn't say have you talked to anybody else but us about it so yeah I don't know I don't we didn't need to know the Rolling Stone magazine I feel the heard of it Ron I feel like I could predict though that humans all always overestimate their ability against animals correct I guess no I mean you know the answer I gave them was one that I think a lot of people didn't believe. I said, yeah, if you got a hundred men in their twenties in good shape that are unified and willing to sacrifice

a few, they're gonna win. Okay, so can you explain to me though, is it a hundred men at once that we're talking about? It's gotta be a hundred men at once, yes. I mean, a hundred men at once. That's gotta be a hundred men at once that we're talking about? However you want to. It's gotta be 100 men at once, yes. I mean 100 men at once. That's gotta be 100 men at once. I think the thing is what you said, Ron, which is willingness sacrifice,

because the reality is 100 men at once, the first two or three, they're getting torn apart in the most graphic way. You're telling me the other 97 are like, no, let's keep going. No, you see a man's head get ripped off. You're like, ah, maybe not. I made it very clear in my interview. Listen, you've got to be able to go in there and realize the first few guys are basically

on a kamikaze mission. Okay. They're on a kamikaze mission. But understanding that if you're willing, if this is your goal, if you're fighting for the greater good, even though a gorilla is a gentle giant, is a vegetarian, and would never be in this predicament and would run away from a hundred men if he saw it coming at him, but people want to insist, well, what if he couldn't run away and you had this fight and who's going to win this fight? Well, okay, at the end of the day, the hundred men are going to survive, the gorilla is not. Now, some of those hundred men, there's going to be collateral damage, okay? There's going to be

bites and arterial bleeding. There's going to be broken necks. There's going to be Suffocation there's going to be you know, just you know horrible concussions that are gonna lead to fatal brain brain bleeds So there's gonna be death there. But at the end of the day if all the men really okay We're gonna say what they're gonna end up at least this physically asphyxiating the gorilla If they just all pile around on like a big huge straight jacket But they're gonna end up at least asphyxiating the gorilla. If they just all pile around him like a big, huge straight jacket,

restrict his ability to open his arms, to extend his arms, and go at gut punches, real good abdominal, you know, trauma, that gorilla's gonna end up not surviving. Ron, how many men would die? I would say probably 10 to 15 are gonna lose it. And why do you think the other 85 are going to keep going? Like I want you to sort of measure the strength

that we're talking about here and how violent all of this would be because I don't know how this works as a coordinated effort. A hundred people getting there is like 50 people getting there. It doesn't make much of a difference. He's gonna tear through a lot of people. Not through a lot, he's gonna tear through a few.

He's gonna tear through a few, don't get me wrong, he's gonna tear through a few, but at the end of the day, 100 men, now if you told me 20 men, I'd say no, the gorilla's gonna take him. What's the number? You know, I'm saying the number's probably gonna be closer to 50.

That's it guys, 50 guys, let's go. Gonna be closer to 50, and this is men, you know, I'm saying the numbers probably gonna be closer to 50. That's it guys 50 guys It's gonna be closer to 50 and this is men You know again going in with this kamikaze attitude saying listen some of us are gonna die But this is for the greater good I made that very clear because in reality like you're saying Dan You know the first few guys get their freaking heads ripped off and bitten off through the skull those next guys go I'm out of here. I'm done. But if they remain committed, they remain committed, they will triumph.

Well, what do those 50 guys have to, Ron, what do those 50 guys have to look like? They can't look like me, is it 50 Brock Lesnar's? And it doesn't make a difference if it's 50 MMA guys versus 50 of us. No, it makes a difference. No, as long as, it can't be 59 year olds, but yeah, 50 guys in their 20s

in reasonably good shape. 59 year olds would get ugly. That's very ugly. The gorilla doesn't have much stamina, does it? No, it doesn't, that's the other thing. It's just gonna become exhausted after a while. You basically exhaust the animal, and you know, people keep thinking,

yeah, it's got the bite, the head is, but the abdomen, the abdomen of that animal could, you know, you can give it some, it's got the bite, the head is bruised, but the abdomen of that animal, you can give it some pretty traumatic injury that would lead to internal bleeding that could lead to its death. You know, the eyes, of course, are always susceptible to things.

And just the bottom line is asphyxiation. You get everybody on top of this gorilla where he can't breathe and he's fighting, he loses his breath, he'll pass out, and he'll eventually die. Rope a dope. Ron, do you have a pen and a paper by you by any chance or no?

I do. All right, great, because I have a hypothetical that one of my friends, a firefighter, Lewis, asked me. So before you kind of just throw it off, cast it aside, remember he's a first responder, so you're disrespecting first responders. All right, so Ron, write this down. You or me, whoever it is,

is stuck in an arena with the following, okay? 50 hawks, 10 crocodiles, three brown bears, 15 wolves, a hunter with a rifle, seven buffalo, 10,000 rats, five gorillas, and four lions. You need to pick two to defend you and the others attack you. Which ones would you choose to survive an hour? I like this.

Let's do it again. Okay, I got 50 hawks, 10 crocs, three bears, 15 wolves, man with a rifle, 10,000 rats and five lions? Yeah, did you put the buffaloes in there? Oh no, how many of those? Seven buffaloes. Also the three brown bears. I don't know if there's a difference

between the brown bear and the black bear, but I know you told us one of them, you say hey bear and the other one, you can't do anything. But the question is basically, do you take the man with the rifle, right? Well, you pick two to help you survive for an hour, but everyone else is attacking.

But you're worried about the rats. You're worried about the number of rats and the rifle. I would think this is also like Royal Rumble style too, right? Where they'll start taking each other out. Every two minutes they come running out of the... Yeah. Yeah, but 10,000 rats. But the rats, I mean, run.

Are they just gonna run by or are they gonna immediately attack? Are they hungry rats? Does it matter? Yeah, would rats... If you're in a room with 10,000 rats. No, this is the same scenario as 100 men and a gorilla. I don't want to face 10,000 rats. Yeah, I could take out probably a hundred of them, maybe 200 of them.

But if they're coming at me like a freaking scene out of Willard and they're all biting and gnawing, I'm going to die. But would they be? So that sounds like you're drafting the rats to protect you, right? Yes, I'm drafting the rats to protect me. I want the rats too on my team. So the rats and the rifle is what you're taking and say, bring all comers. Yep. I don't know. I'm not a rifleman Ron like rifles are not automatic

You'd have to reload the rifle and do you have unlimited ammo in that situation? Oh, no. No, I'm going with an automatic rifle No, okay. All right. Good. I assume that we were taking a rifleman who could shoot and would take out a number of could shoot and would take out a number of animals. I see more so with a musket. Is it just me with a bayonet then is what you're giving me? No, no that wasn't an option. No bayonets involved here. No, no. I would go with the 10,000 rats man with a rifle.

My second option with the man without the man with the rifle would be five lions. What about the wolves? The wolves that work together? The wolves would be, you know, they're certainly a concern because they are very teamwork oriented and can wear down stamina and there are 15 of those which makes a difference. I'm not worried about the wolves. Who would be the... Five lions, five lions will take away 15 wolves.

Who'd be the first to go, Ron? Because now I'm thinking with these large size animals, like the rats, they could just step on them very easily by accident, not even realizing what they're doing. That's true, but there's 10,000 of them, Billy. But there's 50 hawks also. Hawks can go into the rafters if they want to just fly by, they can hide out. But hawks are going to inflict puncture wounds

with their talons, that's it. They're not going to pet, it's not going to be their beak, it's the talons that are going to hurt you. So yeah, you're going to cut up, you might lose an eye, you're going to bleed a lot, they're not going to kill's not gonna be the beak it's the talents are gonna hurt you so yeah you're gonna cut up you might lose an eye you're gonna bleed a lot they're not gonna kill you what is the rifleman have to do though he's got to take out the lions first and then the Bears and now there are wolves on his arms yeah oh so wait a minute wait a minute you're telling me that you got two things to defend you against

everything else that's the thing that you have a problem with here the bears are running all over the place. They've left the wolves alone, and now my rifleman is covered in buffalo. If that's the case, if you're telling me, I can just pick two to defend me against all the rest, it's not if, but when you're gonna die. No, but you have to survive only one hour.

Who keeps you alive the longest? So this is the question, Ron. See, what's happened here is I've sent my rats out, and I think I'm okay, but I'm not okay, because my rifleman rifleman slow. He's old and he's only got eight of the animals now What am I doing with the rest if they're all hell-bent on telling me and you're bringing in a lot of other factors here You're bringing in fact. I can't control the rat. I'm assuming. I'm assuming everything. We're talking about here is in its prime Yeah, the best of what I can't control the rats though the rats are not trainable Yeah, that's are not attacking.

No, wait a minute. If you're having animals to protect you, you're assuming that they are trainable. For that matter, none of this is like, the guy with the rifle is gonna say, hell, I'm outta here. I don't wanna deal with all this shit. He's gonna run away.

I'll tell you what, Ron. He can just try to shoot you and they're like, we're done. I'll tell you what though, there's gonna be a dud rat or two in the 10,000, if we're gonna be honest with you. Yeah, but it's 10,000. A dud rat or two that still leaves 9,998. It's 10,000 rats.

Well, okay. 50 hawks got nothing against 10,000 rats. They're just gonna be flying around. They have nothing. And crocs are not fast enough. Crocs are not fast enough on land. Now we're doing this on land, I'm assuming, right? I'm not doing this in the water.

No, you're in an arena, yeah. Yeah, we're on land, but are crocs gonna chase me around? Don't I have to just run around in circles and they'll stop chasing me because they can't do that? Yeah, well, no, no, no, that zigzag stuff is another myth. No, no, no, but they're not gonna, you're gonna be able to get away from crocs on land. That's not a problem.

How do I get away from a crocodile? How do I do that? You're saying if I zigzag, it doesn't work? I'm telling you right now, you say it's a myth, I'm zigzagging if I'm getting chased out of those. Or running in circles. And you may get nailed then, Chris's a myth I'm zigzagging if I'm getting chased by one of those guys. Or running in circles. And you may get nailed then Chris because when you're zigzagging instead of going the croc is going in a straight line It's gonna catch us you're zagging.

I could juke at a croc. So it's not zigzagging a crocodile can't actually chase us down very well, can it if we're not running in a straight line? Yeah, if you're running in a straight line even then, you're not going to get chased down by a crocodile. You'll be able to outrun the crocodile. In a short spurt, okay, if a crocodile, if you walk up to a crocodile, let's say 10 feet away and you surprise it, in a short spurt, it can overtake you. But I'll run a mile faster.

I'm assuming that you're going to see these crocodiles from a further distance away I mean what's the size of the room you're in it's an arena it's an arena yeah it's an arena so you got plenty of room to get away from crocodiles at least to my concerns here okay so okay Ron we took the rats we took the guy with the rifle what's the strategy in my mind the rifle guy takes out the hawks first, right? Just, oh no, no, no. The rifle guy takes out the lions, man. Lions and the bears.

Lions gotta go, right after that the bears. But what if the wolves break into three, there's 15 wolves, remember. What if they break it into three packs of five? They could take down some of these. This is why I'm saying I've got wolves on my arms on my riflemen and now I've just got a bunch of rats defending me.

And now I'm proper bleeped because I don't have a rifleman anymore. Is there any part of these animals that see one lone human being standing there and think, that's the least of my worries. And they just start attacking each other. And then you just kind of hang out in the corner. And then all of a sudden,

your last man standing in this Royal Rumble. I think the rats are gonna dominate. 10,000. I think they'll be bored just running around not doing anything. I don't think they're just gonna go into attack mode, right? Don't. Listen, we've got to make this decision under the assumption that the animals know I think they'll be bored just running around not doing anything. I don't think they're just gonna go into attack mode right now.

Listen, we've gotta make this decision under the assumption that the animals know that their job is to defend or to attack. Yes. Okay? So these rats are, they're trained rats that are gonna defend you with everything they've got. Yes, because otherwise, like Ron said, then the guy with the rifle might just turn around

and shoot you and be like, oh yeah, we don't have any I'm out of here, but the rats can't do anything What the Hawks the Hawks are never gonna go on the rats level Hawks come and start attacking you whilst while the rats are the ground Game Hawks can the Hawks aren't gonna kill you Billy. They can't know they're trying to these are trained Hawks killer Hawks Yeah, can I can can I replace one of the wolves with a former Minnesota Timberwolf? Kevin Garnett? No, I would take Peckovich.

Oh, yeah, he's in some hot water. Really? I gotta Google that one. Organized crime. Oh really? Well, no, now I want him on my team. You don't want him against you. Ron, good seeing you, good talking to you.

Thank you, sir. Oh God, have a good day, guys. It's exhausting for him.