The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: Malfeasance

Episode Date: March 21, 2024

March Sadness seeds continue to be revealed, this time diving into seeds from the Region of Songs, Greg Cote feat. Greg Cote Region, and the Region of Death, while also contemplating how to make Tony quit. Dan's quest to go viral in a costume still continues, while discussions about the new Road House movie inevitably lead to bar fights at Jimmy Johnson's The Big Chill. And as always, Jess gets the blame for everything, while Billy's antics include donating to Austin Ekeler's charity and scheming for a signed jersey. Then Billy Gil outs Dan Le Batard as a one-time Yankees fan after we look at the strange Joe Torre moment from Spring Training.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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He, spoiler alert, told us he was going to do that. Gambling days, these are the two most fun days of the year and I owe Billy and the audience an apology here because I undercut the beginning of this tournament with my pessimism about replacing the looks like game. Adam McKay was a barrage of texts last night. He wrote a bunch of looks like trying to get the tournament back. Any good ones? No, he's never been able to make it into the tournament. He did individual ones on each of you guys, if you want me to read any of those. I don't know how good those are, I just got those.

They're probably not very good. Well, he's never made the tournament. Him and Mike Schur have never written anything comedically funny enough to make our tournament. And so I didn't support this correctly. I rebelled in the wrong way, so forgive me, and let's do Mark Sadness now correctly. Well forgive us Dan, because we disappointed you.

I would say seems to be the general consensus here, and the fans I think. But here's the thing, I think that we didn't roll it out correctly, and for that I will take the blame, because we thought that we were gonna do like a slow rollout where we just like preview a couple and then that didn't work out On Monday and then we just like told you what the regions were and then we just did the play-in games But you never saw like the full bracket So we kind of changed something that you liked and then only gave you part of the rest

Hoping that you trusted us and that was our mistake, was trusting you guys. So, I apologize for putting my faith in trusting the fans, I guess is what I would say here. And also then you just blame Jess for everything, which is like, it seems the way things go, you don't like something, it's Jess's fault. So, don't blame Jess, blame me if anything.

How did Jess get blamed for anything? Yeah, someone misunderstood a joke I made about Adam McKay and Mike Schur not being funny, which I stand by. They've never made the tournament. Look, I'm not gonna say they're not funny. They're okay. Resolutions are, you know.

They have not made the tournament, that's a fact. Our listeners have been, look, those are funny writers. Writing funny is the hardest kind of writing. Fighters. But then they thought that I canceled looks like because of woke. I'm here to say that did happen, but we can't publicly blame Jess for that. So just blame me, you know what I mean?

It's bad optics if we just blame the woman, even though it's all her fault, but don't blame her. Blame me, I'll wear this one, even though it's her fault. Anyway, what a preview. March Sadness here, Dan, or what are you thinking? I do, I'm just laughing at the stray Zagacki, which is one of my favorite characters. Because Zagacki hates it so much. Does he really?

Oh my God, but how? He knows about it? Yeah, well not only does he know about it, Mike's a giant University of Miami fan, so imagine Mike pulling up next to Zagacki in like the parking lot four hours before he. Mike sits right behind him at UMD. Before UMD.

Well, he knows that Mike does an impression of him. I don't know if he knows the evolution of this character that has happened this season. Forgive me guys please in video can you just get for me at your... Oh boy this isn't gonna help I know what you're gonna ask for Dan this isn't gonna make it better. Just put it in the corner somewhere Zagacki with the sunglasses so that so that people can see who we're talking about it. Well no the sunburned from wearing the sunglasses. Burned into his sunglasses. Billy what people have been asking me the most is when they can vote on this stuff. the sunburn from wearing the sunglasses. Burned into his sunglasses. Billy, what people have been asking me the most is when they can vote on this stuff. I think you can vote now.

Oh, well I mean the playin' games happen, you should be able to vote on the playin'. This is what we're gonna do, we're gonna go around the bracket because some people were talking, hey there's the songs region, the Greg Cody region featuring Greg Cody, the club region, and then the region of death, as you know,

which is costumes. But if we just go down one of them, people are gonna get mad, because they're like, why are we listening to songs for 25 minutes? So, we're gonna start out in the Songs region, and the number two song is one that was made for, you know, our dear friend,

who says that he's never been able to make the tournament, so this was kind of a way that we found for him to make the tournament. Here's Adam McKay's theme song, I guess. Die, we're all gonna die. We're all gonna die. We're all gonna die. The sky seems to be falling, and we're all wondering why. A great year for songs. A great year.

Again, he's not very funny. So that was the number two seed. And this is going up against our number 15 seed, which is a song dedicated to David Samson's thousandth episode. ["Why Am I Sitting In A Ball Glove Chair?" by David Samson plays.] A billion dollars, you're not for me, Clive. It's all business, nothing personal, honey. I'm cashing in on this podcasting money. It's time to celebrate 1,000 episodes where

I tell you to wait to see. Oh, as I'm running through the tall skyscrapers, got some news that made me go pee-pee. There's a new show in town, Poplar Tour it finds out, and I'm seething with jealousy. Just put me in the main show feed. Let's remember that March Sadness is presented

by Get Your Guide. Discover over 100,000 unforgettable travel experiences Let's remember that March Sadness is presented by Get Your Guide. Discover over 100,000 unforgettable travel experiences in the US and around the world at GetYourGuide.com. So that's the song regions, Dan. That's a little preview of the song regions. The songs were good this year. Do you feel better about this now?

I do, yes. Well, the songs, it's the Yeti category, but I'm proud that Yeti hustled his way into a pretty good gig with us. We haven't gotten to the Jeremy chunk of the region, which everyone will love, I'm sure. Less good than Yeti's, I think we can all agree. No, no, you're right, Dan, you're right, you're right. Do you and Jeremy have a thing? Me and Jeremy have a thing about what?

You don't like Jeremy? No, but the quality of Yeti as a musician is way better than Jeremy's. I don't mean it as an insult of Jeremy. I don't mean it as an insult of Jeremy I don't mean it as an insult of Yeti, but you just insult him and then say it's not an insult No, one has to be better. I don't think to say LeBron James isn't as good as Michael Jordan either No, I think you can be appreciative for both things and think that yet He's making appreciative of Jeremy. I am but he's- Are you appreciative of Jeremy? Yes. I am, but he's-

Where is Jeremy? Yeti's- I am, but? Yeti's, but- You are? Yeti's better. Well, I mean, we'll let the fans decide. Go to Twitter and you can vote for a dare.

Yeah, he is a very good musician. Instagram, social media, yeah. I agree, but- Dan, this was a region that I thought you would love, which is the Greg Cody region featuring Greg Cody. Here's our number three seed, where Greg Cody told us in Las Vegas he doesn't miss his wife. I hadn't left the hotel until last night. I'm a very quiet man. Yes, you know, I'm married man I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line

That I wrote You know, I wish you were here my wife I really miss her No, I don't that's the thing about being married. You know, you're not allowed to say I don't miss my wife I've been gone two days. I've been gone long enough to miss my wife. I'm sorry. I call her, I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds. You know, what am I, hello, all right, all right, we'll see ya, all right.

And then, you know, I'm gonna see her in two days. How's jumping Charlie? Good. And that's it. That kind of thing. Exactly. That kind of thing. So you miss her or you don't miss her?

I, you have to pretend, oh, I miss you, you know, I Make up your mind. Oh, I miss you. I wish you were here. But no. I mean, come on. Yeah, no. I've been married for like 40 years. 43 years. Why? I'm allowed to be away from my wife. And you know what? She doesn't miss me, I guarantee you that.

I guarantee you that. It's a break for her. She's on vacation without me there. Are you kidding me? And you know it. Baby, and break for her. She's on vacation without me there. Are you kidding me? And you know it. Baby, and you know it. And you know it. Baby.

They were. Three seed. They were eating out of the palm of his hand. Oh my God. He crushed it in Vegas, man. He was so happy. That's a three seed. We got two things better than that.

Yeah, that's going up against the 14 seed where Greg Cody's talking about Cheez-Its. I've come infatuated with Cheez-Its. Instantly it's become my favorite snack. I spent, I'm not exaggerating, I spent 15 minutes going up and down my potato chip snack aisle three different times, slowly scrutinizing every bag looking for Cheez-Its could not find them. Left thinking that my storage just doesn't carry Cheez-Its, my wife tells me, oh dummy, they're on the cracker aisle. Right.

They also come in a box. Yeah, it's ridiculous. Cheez-Its should be on the potato chip aisle with bagged snacks. But they're not potato chips. And they're not bagged. They're crackers. not potato chips. And they're not bagged. They're crackers. They're bagged. They're not bagged. They're in a box.

Yeah. Cheez-Its are in a bag. They're 100% in a bag. In a bag. But it's not bagged in a box. Yeah, there's a box around the bag. They should be in the snack aisle. Everybody within the sound of my voice is nodding like a bobblehead agreeing with a little

people disagreeing. Literally everyone in here is disagreeing with you. Cheez-Its. Even me, which is all right. The audio is one thing, but Jessica, can you please help me make that go viral on TikTok? I can try. We've actually had a fair number of viral TikToks. Yes, if you're not following us on TikTok.

This is visually funny. My God, without context, why is he wearing that? What is that that he's wearing? He had to dress like a lion, I believe. So he was dressed like a lion. Excellent. All right, I've come around on this bracket. Well, we haven't even gotten to your favorite region,

which is the bracket of death, Dan, or the region of death, where you're the number four seed, where he dressed up as Nacho Libre. Yeah. I'm the number four seed. Ooh. All I saw of this category is that Stugatz Nacho Libre, yeah. I'm the number four seed. Yeah. Ooh. All I saw of this category is that Stugatz

was a one seed as Rocky, which was just putting on a hoodie, which enraged me, which is what soured me on everything we were doing here, if I'm being totally honest. Why? Because you did that. No, the committee. You made Stugatz as Rocky a one seed.

No, the committee. It's my fault. Yeah, Jess did it. It's always my fault. Yeah, Jess did it. It's always my fault. It, uh, just because. And so this is a four seed? Yeah, it's not truly. I would say, I know we always tell you, you look great in these things.

I think this was the peak for you. You haven't said that today. No. Well, you don't look good today. Ted Lasso has not been a hit. And no one has ever worn a visor more poorly than you. It doesn't look like a visor on your head. I know, but if you pull it down, it blocks your eyes,

so that's probably why. But it just. You look kinda like Jamie Kennedy in Malibu's Most Wanted, that visor. Little bit. Put that in the picture in picture, please. What else, what is Nacho Libre playing again? So that's the four seed going up against

number 13 seed Stu Gatz when he dressed as Kirk Cousins with a chain on, but he was also hiding amongst different trees because he didn't want to actually show what he looked like completely shirtless. And you can vote on all of these categories. If Stu Gotz beats Dan here, I might quit. Well it's fan voting. I wouldn't say that. Don't do that.

You're going to have people vote against you. The voters are very stupid. He took his shirt off and put a chain on it. Trots always wins and he will win all of this as well and Billy will lament it and cause it. Wait, whoever the opposite of what you said wins all quit. Don't you offer. Well, okay.

So, see who wants people to quit more? It's probably pretty split between you and me, Chris. I've never been more hated. Remember, I'm sitting here too, so... Roy is the mystery third option. If it's 50-50, Roy quits. That's probably bound to happen too. How do we get Tony to quit?

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Terms and conditions apply. Don Lebatard! This is largely performative, but we need to establish at least some reasonable doubt. Yes, exactly. Everyone wants to join in themselves, telling peace stories, and Stugats had to top everyone with a police story where he pees more than you do. Stugats. I always like leaving Dan on high. Because he's so vulnerable, I just unfairly fade down the chicken to just leave him by himself.

This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats. If you guys want to coach me up here because you've been making fun of my look and the visor and everything else on what the thing is that you think I need to say to produce me up to say the Ohtani thing that gets me railing against the thing as everyone tries to get into the algorithm saying the thing about the thing, wearing this outfit. If we need to straighten out my mustache,

what it is you think I should say in order to reach the masses with they want their instantaneous Ohtani news, I'm here for suggestions. Here's the thing, Dan. You're kind of dressed like every other sports radio host in the world right now. So it's not really like, oh, it's Dan,

just kind of dressed normal. Even though you don't dress like that, people will distinguish. Obviously, Stu gots is like a cartoon character who wears the same thing every single day. So it's hard to be like, oh, look, Dan's in costume. So what you're saying is this makes it less clear than it ought to be that I'm just not sports radio person pontificating old timey judgments

on that bad boy from baseball. Yeah, like the hat kind of like beat out, you have like the shirt that's a little bad. The visor's not great. I need your help with something as a crew because we've been a bit Roadhouse obsessed as a show, a nostalgic show Roadhouse somehow even Roy wants to talk about Roadhouse a Patrick Swayze classic about they're just can you guys get for me the description of Roadhouse just that is the official description because

it's ridiculous and now people are very excited about the return of that movie but before we do that your level of excitement is what, Roy, about this ridiculous Roadhouse movie? The new Roadhouse movie, absolutely zero. Zero, because you can't remake the original Roadhouse, man. That's a classic. Mine is a million, Dan. I am super excited for this movie.

Oh, the complete opposite back here. Yes, the complete opposite. Mine's infinity, actually. Is it because Conor McGregor is on on steroids and it's just basically guys who kick ass I love this movie is gonna be now. Absolutely. I love fighting I love people getting thrown off boats getting side kicked off boats people getting their throats ripped out like the original Roadhouse But now we had Jake Gyllenhaal Jose down in his luck UFC fighter, but they actually have him in a UFC octagon They shut down like a complete UFC card to have this happen

So they filmed that he looks great, and he's kicking ass all of a sudden Connor McGregor's there. He's the bad guy One thing you cannot replace Dalton Patrick Swayze you can't but we're gonna try really hard with Jake Gyllenhaal I'm really excited. It came out today I'm torn damn because it's like do I go home and watch the tournament and tell my wife I'm because I'm watching the tournament, you know, cuz we got the show tomorrow or do I watch Roadhouse? It's for work, too. It is well, that is true. Either way. I'm covered I don't X UFC fighter Dalton takes a job as a bouncer at a Florida Keys Roadhouse only to discover that always have this paradise Is not all it seems. He got me. I'm in I I'm in because I've been to those dive bars, Alabama, Jackson, on, on, on, I don't want to get too deep into it.

Data dathering. He's falling apart today. What happened, Tony? We're still in gather, data. That's what's happening. Chris will tell you, those are hard to come back from. Those are, yeah, words. No matter what your confidence level is.

We're still in gather, data, data. That's AI, that wasn't even me last segment What I was gonna say is I want to incriminate myself in certain places that I've been Alabama Jax You know you said the name of the big chill place down there big chill Jimmy Johnson's bar Not a Roadhouse type bar The time of day you go that's laid-back vibes You've never been there. You've never been there. You don't know what the Margaritaville in Key West is like, right?

That is some bullshit bravado from you right there. That is just... Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What? It's a tiki goddamn bar. It is. Until it isn't. What is that? That means nothing. Until some bad people walk in and you got to regulate. That's why you need a Dalton to make sure that people don't.

Like, regulate? Yeah. Oh, you wouldn't, gee. That's right. Regulators mount up. The big show has been getting it done for 20 years in Tavenir. Jimmy Johnson runs that whole place, runs that whole town. Old style mafioso from Miami who moved his life out there.

We got to do a showdown, if you want. Yes, absolutely. And I will not disparage that place It is a cathedral disparagement I love the bill but but the people there are Jimmy Johnson's age and they're pull up They're pulling down Heineken's and they're not bar fighting like Patrick Swayze and Roadhouse Who was just it was just a movie about bodyguards not being overrun by the town we're looking at the big show right now this Tony this is no you don't get what you don't see is closer towards the bay there's a little that's on the

water some people a little bit too much you got him with a picture of it at night that's all I'm saying yeah Tony hogs heaven Dan you ever right there that's exactly what I'm talking about not right there back in those you see where the to the right where the single tables are There's a lot of malfeasance that goes on Dan you ever been to hogs heaven they have to regulate hogs heaven. Oh hogs heaven You have to kick ass at hogs heaven Dan Journalistic credibility and get reckless

Here is something we like to call reckless speculation Don't even get me started on the Tiki Hut. The Tiki Hut, you have to get there by boat. They're obviously redoing it right now, so you can't actually get there. But when they did have it open, you have to make sure that you got your head on a swivel, Dan. Roundhouse kicks are needed at the Tiki Hut, at Stewart's,

at all these places. You need to have your head on a swivel just to... Sa! Hold on. The camera missed it again. I'm going to do it sidekick. Here we go. Ready?

Hog heaven. SAH! Right there. Hog's heaven, dude. If you don't have your head on a swivel, hog's heaven, good luck. This feels to me like when A-Rod said Kendall was the hood. Oh wow. I don't feel like you know what you're talking about.

This is a lovely fishing bar area. It is delightful. When was the last time you were down there, Dan? Oh boy. I what you're talking about. This is a lovely fishing bar area. Just, it is delightful. What was the last time you were down there, Dan? Oh boy. I want you to ask me. You know what? When was the last time you were at Hogs Heaven?

Dan gets invited to his house. He doesn't go to Big Chill. You know what? I have been there. In the last 10 years I've been there, I'm gonna say five times. Wow, that's a lot. What?

I drive by it often and stop there. I think I had a private meeting one time there with Greg Cody, your father, in which I... I remember that, yep. I complained to him about how entitled everyone in our environment was, and he agreed and said, yes, everyone but me. At Hog Heaven this happened?

Well, you're at a tropical bar in the Keys. That's right. That's correct. You didn't think that, you don't think I go to a tropical bar in the Keys? That's right. That's correct. You didn't think that, you don't think I go to a tropical bar in the Keys? It's not, it's toward the Keys. It's not, the Keys is three and a half hours away. This is about 90 minutes away and the drive is lovely.

The drive is lovely. I imagine someone brings the Keys to you. The Keys to the Keys? No, like they bring you the Keys, like you just look at Miami Beach and then all of a sudden, like what the hell is hell is that I was like that's Isla Morada We brought it for Dan folks from the maker away from the makers of we're still in gather data. We bring you Shit

Jack's dawn on on that I was gonna sit down on card sound But I'm talking to people that don't know what I'm talking about Alabama Jack's dawn on on that on card sound. That's what I was trying to say. Okay, go sit in the family Wow I should go try to keep people safe and key Largo Isla Marotta and the like I say something today's not the day CBS Sports Network to be airing old games Okay, you're confusing the hell out of me because the game just tipped off and I thought that we were live Okay, you're confusing the hell out of me because the game just tipped off and I thought that we were live.

But we're not. We're watching our first four from God knows when, earlier this week I guess, and it's starting right before the real game starts. Now's not the time for this. I have a confession to make and I feel like I don't wanna make it on air and Jess knows what I'm talking about.

Is this something I should reveal on air? It's about my brackets, Dan. I think you should reveal it on air. So there's bracket competitions going on now, tournaments if you will. I don't know if you'd. Including ours on lebatardaf.com. You have about an hour now, even though this will be,

actually this will get released after probably. Wait a minute, let's do this. Nevermind, you missed it. Hold on, let's do this. Executive producer, let's do this. In theory I was spot on. We're recording this at 11, I'm like, folks you got an hour, hurry up. You've had a sterling record today. Let's get this you've had in theory I was spot-on recording this at 11 I'm like folks you got an hour hurry up you've had a sterling record today let's get this out as fast as he did he has yes of awful yes you

saw what he just did he grabbed the show and he said I got it I'll spin the plates over here and then they collided into each other but alt instead of space Billy because the time has been poorly managed today by our executive producer are we too late in the call to action right now telling people right now? It's not too late to get involved in this tournament where we're going to be playing against you and there's gonna be a merch sadness is gonna be adjacent to it and Merch madness is gonna be adjacent to it now is the time right for people to go do this Well now is the time in real time.

Depending on when you're listening to this, you may already be too late. Like, if it's six o'clock in the afternoon and you're at the gym, sorry, bud, you missed it. And that's my fault. I should have put the episodes out sooner. And I should have talked through TV. Exactly right.

Anyway, so I'm gonna actually take advantage of the fact that there's a chance that a lot of these tournaments are already closed, and I wanna tell you something that I did, because I feel like a terrible person. And I don't normally, I do bad things, but I don't feel bad about a lot of them, because I justify it in the name of my own entertainment. Right?

Yeah, you are not generally remorseful, I find. You don't do a lot in the way of regret. Life choices, I make a lot of regrets. But in terms of misbehaviors, sometimes I think, you know what, that was funny at the time. You amuse yourself, you did this earlier. Who better than me to make laugh? Couple of different times.

That's what I say. Yes, you did it when we were talking to Gustavo earlier. Someone needed to translate that. I wasn't just gonna hang him out there to dry. You know what I mean? Anywell, so. Literally what you did. Here's the thing, we had Austin Echler on,

he's a new Washington commander, Dan, and he's been good to us over the years, and he has a charity tournament going on, so we wanted to participate in that. Now there is a donation required. Oh boy. To participate in that, which, if I'm gonna be perfectly honest with you,

I was like, oh, a little steep, but I said it's all for a good cause, Austin's done so much for us, and if you want to go, you can go to ecrafoundation.org if you want to just be nice and donate to his foundation. Except it's probably too late. It's pro- well, you can always donate to a foundation, I think, and I'm assuming you could get a tax, you know, whatever. Anyways, so as part of it, there's prizes for first place, second place, third place, fourth place, and then there's also- Like for biggest donations, you're saying? No, no, no, for like how the brackets play out.

There's all these prizes for if you win, you can go to March Madness this, next year, whatever, right? There's also a prize for the worst bracket, which is an autographed Austin Eckler jersey. And old Billy Gill thought, if I pick all 16 seeds, I can have the worst bracket. And I can pay $50 and maybe walk out of here with an autographed Jersey

And I felt like a despicable human being picking pretty good every single 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 But I did it and I did it in four regions And then when there's the tiebreaker where you pick the score to see who the winner is I? Pick the score of one to nothing because there's no chance that that's the score So I have to have the worst bracket and the best part about March Madness is I still won't Because someone will have a worse bracket than that even intending to completely take that right and win a jersey There will be a couple of upsets Yeah, this is a single 16 makes it to the second round. I'm screwed. That's correct

A purposely bad bracket is gonna be better than I may win People are gonna play against us. This is what's gonna happen. It's what we're doing right now But there it's already too late right now, but it's already too late. Maybe right now right now Thanks, Jess. How is that a 16 seed by the way? The right now is a classic cannon that we use on the show. Inside the show, outside the show. How is it a 16C? All right, we're gonna update more of the tournament.

We gotta get people excited about this thing. Fed Lasso has- He sounds so excited. Behaved poorly. Well because Tony just told me I look like every sports media person. It was a great line. I look like Popeye the Sailor with a dyed brown mustache

and I'm trying to say a thing about Ohtani so that we get. You look more like Popeye's nemesis. What's that guy's name? Pluto. I do look, you know what? How do you know that guy's name? I do. Because he's the, okay.

Howdy folks, it's Mike Ryan. It's springtime and while every time is a good time for Miller Lite, springtime is among the best. I was sitting out in my backyard watching some flowers bloom and some beautiful birds swimming from Royal Fishtail Palm to Royal Fishtail Palm and I had a Miller Lite in my hand and I said, yeah This is the good life. Over the years a lot has changed. One thing that hasn't, the great taste of Miller Lite. It was the original light beer and to this day is still the very best one. Miller Lite has more of the taste that you want and less of the stuff that

you don't. Oh Miller Lite, you were always there for me. I thank the heavens for you every time I'm sitting on my back patio and I take a sip. Ah, tastes like Miller time. To get Miller Lite delivered right to your door, visit MillerLite.com slash Dan, where you can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories per 12 ounces. with the Stugats. So it's technically too late probably for most people listening to this later on the exercise bike or whatever or running through their neighborhood or at a job late at night. It's too late for them to participate with us in what the fun of today and these next couple of days of gambling is as we talk about a gambling scandal and this is one of the biggest gambling days of the year and it's basically I know nothing

about anybody but I think my team's going to win by five points because we've got somebody in the post who could turn a turn around jumper every once in a while and I don't care whether we're any good or not I could just gamble money on the games we're in the middle of that right now and I wanted to ask everybody now because I don't know if we're gonna do more songs from our March sadness bracket But I Every day around here have some bit of news that ends up appearing where I'm like man that that makes me feel ancient and

Baseball yesterday feel ancient and baseball yesterday had a pitching change where Joe Torre was ceremoniously brought out to make a pitching change in spring training and I'm like who's that for that the nostalgia of that the nostalgia of Joe Torre champion Yankees spring trainingal old manager, he's gonna come out here and say this pitcher's not good enough anymore, give me the ball, go back to the dugout, all of this is dumb. He honestly looks the same as when he left us.

He's still with us. When he left baseball. No, I'm saying when he left baseball. It's not like he looks much older, he looked that old when he managed. Jessica, why are you laughing? Because of how stupid all of this is? Lewis that that one of those guys looks like Tony and now We need to watch the video again because I think he meant the picture that guy

No, it does not look like 55. Okay, but somebody out there looked like Tony And you thought it was a good idea to repeat something Lewis said well You thought it was a good idea to ask me what was funny You were laughing because you were laughing in the middle of what I thought was our conversation. Jess, it's my fault. It's all your fault. It's my fault.

It's my fault. Dan, you wanna feel old? You know who the point guard for the TCU Horned Frogs is? Joe Torey. Jameer Nelson Jr. Oh. That one hurt you, Roy? Yeah.

Do we have music that we can play that every day will just come out with some old thing that we talk about? Well, you thought you were kind of feeling young today, but it turns out you're so old. When the Dan LeBattard show was through God's first aired, Greg Cody was nine days shy of his 87th birthday. Now kick rocks and tell us more about just how old you are.

Jeremy's better. I read a story that made me laugh. You'll appreciate this Roy, the other day because I did not know this story that the last pitch of Bob Gibson's career back when baseball was baseball and Bob Gibson was the most intimidating of pitchers because he threw a hundred miles an hour and everyone else threw 84 Bob Gibson allowed a grand slam to Pete Lecock on the last pitch that he threw of his career and Ten years later at an old timers game at Wrigley field the

first time that the Lecoq stepped in Gibson beamed him. Hell yeah. Of course. Things that make guys say hell yeah. That's it right there. Lecoq? Beating Lecoq. Yeah.

This segment doesn't work. What? Is it the guitar riff? I do want to every day, though though bring in something like Joe Tori does that mean anything to you Billy you could go baseball Nostalgic the Yankees you don't care about the Yankees. I hate the Yankees and Joe Tori the Yankees used to be a thing Yeah, that's why they have to bring out Joe Tori because they're not a thing anymore. They used to be so like hey What do we do? How do we keep Yankees fans interested? Let's bring out Joe Torre,

who by the way, has a position with the commissioner's office. So what are you doing dressing in one of your team's uniforms coming out and acting on behalf of that team? They should fire him. This is bigger than the Ohtani thing. Mm-hmm. Are the Yankees not a thing anymore? I mean, amongst Yankees fans, but they're all idiots.

Is baseball a thing? Baltimore's better. Tampa's better. Toronto has been as good the last couple of years. Boston and the Yankees don't matter anymore. Yankees are spending, but that division is upside down. And everyone knows that Baltimore's young players are going to make them good for 10 years,

because they've won the finances of the game. So the Yankees are going to try and spend their way to a Soto here and there. But you don't game So the Yankees are gonna try and spend their way to a Soto here and there But you you don't care about the Yankees the way that you used to Billy, right? They're not as relevant to you baseball. You still love baseball But what the Yankees meant what Joe Tory meant the last time that the Yankees were everything the Yankees were supposed to be What he doesn't mean anything to you anymore Yankees don't mean anything to you anymore. He's even a good manager I mean he had all 13's every year.

How do we know he was such a good manager? He's, I think, one of the best managers ever. Because of the team that he had. What did he do before that? You know what I mean? He had dead last teams before that. He was welcomed into town as Loser Joe by the tabloids. So hard to win with Derek Jeter and Jorge Posada

and Scott Brochus. That's right. He just named, Scott Brosius was a terror throughout the post season. I don't think any of those guys were like top prospects though. No, none of those guys were even. No, they were shitty players actually, now that we talk about it. No one thinks that any of the players

on the Yankees were ever any good. They were good in the playoffs. Only because they had Joe Torre apparently. He really said something in those meetings that everything clicked and all of a sudden, everyone became a hall of fame around old Joe Torre apparently he really said something in those meetings that everything clicked and all of a sudden Everyone became a Hall of Fame around old Joe Torre. Did you see Stanton yesterday? He looks thin. He hit three home runs that like added up to like 1,400 feet or something like that combined like he hit the ball so far. He's still so good even being super skinny

He's still so good. Wait, what do you mean super skinny? He's lost He's getting a little skinnier and that yeah, that doesn't that doesn't add up to me Get your board Have too much I can fix something here Dan probably hates the Yankees the most being a raised guy your big raised guy Well, but I'm watching this year that you were a Yankees fan growing up, weren't you? You reek of I had the Yankees fandom in me. That was a Mets fan. I'm sniffing around here.

I think it was Mets, Billy. I'm getting to the bottom of something here. Billy's got me. He's got me cornered. Billy. Caso cerrado! That's how you do it, Tony. Billy, that was a betrayal.

I trust you, Billy. I didn't know, I just... I trust you. No, Billy, you sniffed me out. Something was amiss. You sniffed me out. Mister. I will tell you where my first allegiance resides,

and I'm ashamed of it. It's hard for me to admit. A friend of mine was cousins with Bucky Dent, growing up in 1976, Hialeah, when Bucky Dent was hitting home runs as Hialeah's when Bucky Dent was hitting home runs, as Hialeah's own. Bucky Dent hit home runs. Well, Hialeah's own, Bucky Dent,

and because they were cousins, I had an adjacent to sports, and I stugots my way into fandom by just being near someone who was the famous shortstop for the New York Yankees. That's where my sports fandom began. I'm ashamed to say it. Because we didn't have sports in Miami other than football and the team trained in Fort Lauderdale. The Yankees trained in Fort Lauderdale. So we didn't have anything else and that's where

sports allegiances began for me. I'm ashamed to admit it publicly. It's okay. Don't feel too bad. It hurts. It's self-loathing. I've done nothing but rip Yankee fans all my life. It's self-loathing and you sniffed it out and you embarrassed me here in front of people now. Well, my family grew up as Mets fans because when they came from Cuba, they went to New York for a little bit. There was no Miami team. There's no baseball team. They lived in in New York. So they were Mets fans for a little bit until the Marlins came around and then they became Marlins fans. But some members of my family still pretend that they're Mets fans even having no idea what's going on with the Mets which I don't understand at all. That's that's a big caveat for a lot of Cubans down here because the Marlins obviously didn't

come until 93. So there's a lot of teams that had to be fans. It was Braves though. TBS a lot of Braves fans. My dad is a Dodger fan for some reason because that's the Braves were the advent of cable television. Oh baseball games from out of market. I used to love watching Braves games even as a Marlins fan the game of the week on NBC Hated the Braves god. I hate I hate more teams that I like well obviously because you only have one team that you should like But I hate I love to hate people but Billy up until recently It was the best the route to hate the Braves because they always were good and they never won Like I know now they've won a World Series

But it was just so great in the 90s when they were one of the best teams but could never win the whole thing I have a question for you guys because I explained this to my wife and she's like, what are you talking about? So the other day I was watching the late game. I think it was Warriors whoever doesn't matter. You were working Yeah, I was working. It was the Knicks. Warriors Knicks, yes. And I was like, babe, don't turn off the TV. I want to go to sleep listening to the play-by-play. And she's like, why? I'm like, so I know what's happening. Like I'm gonna fall asleep,

but at least I can hear Curry with the Three, this and that or whatever. And it reminds me to the time back when I was a younger kid, eight, nine, 10 years old, early, you know, late 90s, early 2000s, where I would fall asleep to the radio play of like a West Coast game. And maybe it's just because my dad was doing the same thing.

In the 60s, did you? We're talking about here. As a kid, I would listen to the radio. You didn't listen to the radio like in the 90s and the 2000s? When I was in the car. Wasn't like at my house. We would always listen to the radio and turn the TV broadcast down.

I still do it for games. Thank you. I am guessing that Tony's childhood included a father who was about my age listening to Yankee games on AM radio. That's how you went to sleep with your dad playing. It was his radio station, probably. Maybe. Where you went to sleep as a kid listening to Yankee games

on AM radio because your dad was listening. Listen to like Boise State versus like Hawaii ESPN broadcast on like 790, but like 2002. But I would listen to it and fall asleep to it. And my wife found it the weirdest thing that I would listen to the broadcast. We fall asleep to NBA games or whatever is on late

every single night. Like I didn't know that was a weird thing. Yeah, exactly. I thought everyone just fell asleep with the TV on, listening to sports. I wonder if Tony, if this soothes him and puts him to sleep. His dad was listening to so much sports radio as a child

that Tony's earliest childhood memories connecting to sleep and his father are old games on the radio. They are, they are. Like old baseball games, old football games. It's like Pavlov's dog if you play an old radio game of the Nikes. You just start snoring. Do you guys set the timer on your TV? Yes. There's nothing worse than a timer going off before you've decided it's time to go to bed. Then you have to turn it on and do it again. It's a whole thing. I'm gonna set it like 90 minutes. Yeah. I sometimes out I out I out wake that You can be in bed like Tracy Morgan lights off for 90 minutes

Yeah It's a good enough game of you know, the Warriors and the Knicks then yes, it was a good game the next one Can I see the Tracy Morgan video that you guys can't stop talking about please? You look good, but it's good Thank you, baby. You do you look great, how you stayin' in shape these days? Well that's Ozempic. Oh. Yeah, but I've learned to eat, I've ate Ozempic. I gained 40 pounds.

You, oh really? Yeah, I gained 40. I never heard anyone gaining 40. Absolutely. That was such a classic late night, like Jimmy knew what he had, he knew he had a bit on Ozempic, he's like, how you stayin' in shape, man?

We clearly talked about this before the show. How you staying in shape? That's my fault. People get mad at Jimmy Fallon for the fake over laughter. Him and Stugats could go out a little bit on fake over laughter around celebrities. I think it is almost what's most known at this point about Jimmy Fallon if people are looking for a reason

to not like him, which they are because he represents the fall of late night television and a once great product that got eaten up by the internet. Just like Stu Gotz. AI Stu Gotz is still the best thing we do. It's pretty good. I could host a show for 30 years with just that. host a show for 30 years with just that. Howdy folks. It's Mike Ryan.

It's springtime. And while every time is a good time for Miller Lite, springtime is among the best. I was sitting out in my backyard, watching some flowers bloom and some beautiful birds swimming from Royal fishtail palm to Royal fishtail palm. And I had a Miller Lite in my hand and I said yeah this is the good life. Over the years a lot has changed. One thing that hasn't the great taste of Miller Lite. It was the original light beer and to this day is still the very best one.

Miller Lite has more of the taste that you want and less of the stuff that you don't. Oh Miller Lite you were always there for me. I thank the heavens for you every time I'm sitting on my back patio and I take a sip. Ah, tastes like Miller time. To get Miller Lite delivered right to your door, visit MillerLite.com slash Dan, where you can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories per 12 ounces.