The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: Perhaps The Middle (feat. Jessica Smetana)

Episode Date: November 26, 2025

"You need to be diagnosed with a malady." Jessica has aa Top 5 where her OLI should really be her Top 5, but at least SHE isn't mailing it in today. We get to rivalry week, some AFC crap talk, and a very sensual Eddie George. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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and it'll be an epic day of live sports. Black Friday football is at the center of it, with the Chicago Bears taking on the Philadelphia Eagles at 3 p.m. Eastern. That's followed by the final night of the Emirates Cup NBA group play and a doubleheader starting with the Bucks and Knicks at 7 p.m. And the Mavericks and Lakers at 10 p.m. What a nightcap game that is. But the whole day starts with the return of the game.

Capital One Skins game as four elite PGA golfers face off with $4 million on the line. Black Friday game day tees off with Capital One Skins game at 9 a.m. Eastern before the Big Bears Eagles game at 3 p.m. And it culminates with a double dose of Emirates NBA Cup action featuring Bucks Nix at 7pm and Mavs Lakers at 10 p.m. only on Prime. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stucats podcast. So somebody named Anthony Black for the Orlando Magic last night scored 27 points in 17 minutes as part of an 84 point first half

for the Orlando Magic on the road at Philadelphia. It was such a pathetic performance. 27 points in 17 minutes. Midway through the third quarter, it was like 111 to 70 or something. Luca went crazy last night. The Lakers are good. MVP of the day, by the way. Luca is fun to watch, and Andre Drummond squared up legitimately on somebody at seven-foot.

Yeah, but squared up, like wanted, did old-timey, you know, I can't, because I got my hand in the dirt, he did bare-knuckle fighting old-timey. I think like he was legitimately ready to fight. And Andre Drummond as a seven-footer, that would be, seven-footer great at offensive rebounding is just generally someone I don't want to fight. Would you say that as a characteristic, if I say someone is seven feet tall and they're good at offensive rebounding, That's not someone you want. You wish to ever fight. Wendell Carter wasn't skirt. He didn't even back up.

Wendell Caro is it what you do? Is that the NBA stat you'd associate with, is offensive rebounding and fighting? Is there another stat? He could be 5-5. With that shoulder hair? It's a lot of shoulder hair. I would argue fouls per game. If you have a lot of fouls per game, you're someone I don't want to fight.

No, but to dance to dance point, offense rebound, you got to throw a chicken wing of somebody. You got to throw an elbow. You got to throw a knee low. If you lead the league in fouls, though, I don't want to fight you. Although bringing down offensive boards. is easier because people are trying to avoid that shoulder hair. It's disgusting. Not everyone is mailing it in this week, okay? Because Jessica is bringing her A game here. Amin embarrassed himself yesterday with those weekend observations. Jessica's covering for him by doing

not just an internet minute today, but an F1 minute. But I need your help here, Jessica, because I don't want you to blow a gasket, a tire or anything. If we do F1, should we do that at the end or the beginning because there's a degree of difficulty on that lift that it make either the rest of the segment harder or might be harder to do with the end of the segment. Perhaps the middle. Okay. So we will start with LSU and the laugh out loud that's happening around what could be

Mississippi State winning at home in the Egg Bowl on Friday and people are writing Lane better win. And I'm looking at it like, what does this affect Lane at all? Lane could not show up. Lane could not show up for the game and he doesn't need to win because he's, his next job is going to be a great one, even though he's 13 and 25 against ranked teams. Did you see the message board geniuses post, Dan, that was allegedly a hint about his next stop from one of Knox Kiffin's friends via Fortnite? Is that credible? Because I'd be willing to believe. I'd be willing to believe something on Fortnite that Lane Kiffin's kids would break this story before an insider. I'd believe that.

So there's a shout out to message board geniuses who combed through all the message boards and post the funniest and most unhinged things every day. But this is from the Florida 247 message board. And it's a screenshot from a Discord channel from someone named Shea. And it says, my source is Knox Kiffin. We played Fortnite yesterday online. And he told me his dad is going to LSU. Don't send this to chat, please.

Yeah, see, that's the part that gets me. That's why I think it's real. Because if it wasn't real, they wouldn't put don't send this. to the chat, it'll be like you want it everywhere. So that makes me believe it's real. Are you guys saying Zaslo already reported this? Who else is you reported it first? Who's going to get

credit for breaking this story when it's when it's him obviously to LSU? Can I just say, I don't even care, man. Like there's been too much Lane Kiffin content the last few weeks. Let's just write it out and see what happens. I can't speculate any further. I mean, I'm in Norman this weekend for LSU Oklahoma.

Egg Bulls the night before. I'm hoping Lane Kivens on the sidelines, LSU this weekend. I'm almost like W.W.E. style where he just shows up. Oh, my God. That's Langevin's music. That would be great, honestly. I'm so excited. This weekend is going to be so great, Dan. There's so many great rivalry

games this weekend. If I had to make a top five, I don't even know if I could. Top five? Mike Ryan is whispering as you're talking in my ear about how Lane's camp has gone silent. Yeah, I've been on this beat. A decision was made on Friday, and

I know that Ole Miss and Florida are doing their best to do what LSU did to hijack this whole thing, but not a peep since Friday. He hasn't posted any Tumblr quotes either, right? I haven't seen any. No, but have you seen his press conferences?

Dude's dealing with this about as well as anybody could. Who is reporting that he'll stay at Old Miss? Who's reporting that he might go to Florida? No, it's reporting that. No, Brett McMurphy, like, he put out of his own graphic, and Brett is really dialed on this stuff, and he predicted

Ole Miss is where he'll stay. Now there's a lot of people that are really plugged in. Kirk Herb Street probably knows more about the sport and like the inner workings of it than anybody, but he just doesn't come out and report that stuff. He put LSU. From what I was hearing last week before everyone buttoned it up tight, I'm pretty sure LSU hijacked this thing. The statement from the AD over at Ole Miss made it seem like he's for sure leaving, but this is airtight over the last week. Kudos to them. Let's get to her top five. There are five games this week. weekend five rivalry weekend games worthy of our attention? No, there's like 25 to 30, I would say.

But I'm not putting just the ones with playoff implications in my list. For example... Oh, so number one isn't Miami Pitt? No, I'm actually excited to watch that. Like, look, I thought Pitt was better defensively than I expected. I'm not surprised that they crushed Georgia Tech last week because Georgia Tech's defense has been a problem all year. Like we talked about a few weeks ago with Cash Patel,

I still don't know why he was on the show, but I'm curious about, especially because, like, Mike, as you know, Miami hasn't played a lot of true road games this year, and it's going to be really freaking cold in Pittsburgh on Saturday for the noon kickoff. It's going to be like 30 degrees. Oh, that's the part she's liking. As a Pittsburgh person, she's like, oh, when the warm weather people come, they don't like it so much. I'm going to Pittsburgh. I'm going to Pittsburgh for the first time in my life. I've never been to that crap down. Well, text me if you need any recommendations.

I had the best flats of my life at William Penn Tavern last weekend. I ate probably 40 of them. They were so good. Those bridges are delight. That town's underrated. I'm right where the three rivers meet. It's pretty. You're wrong when you say that's a crap town.

It's just an old Browns fan thing with me. Yeah, I'm not offended. AFC North crap talk, Dan. You wouldn't get it. Yeah. You know, I don't like the Browns anymore, but I still hate the Steelers and Ravens. I can't shake down. Do you have OLL or is it just?

five. You're saying there are 30 games. They're not, they're not, they're not five worth watching this weekend. Five? That's, I mean, so, wow, child. Learn ball. Quiet, piggy, okay? Let's start with O-L-I's. I'll give you three OLLIs. The Oregon State, Washington State rematch. Come on, that doesn't count. That doesn't count. Yeah, Keynes fans are watching that game. Canes fans need a big, big W by the home team?

Western Kentucky Jacksonville State kind of a de facto conference playing game. Clemson, South Carolina, both teams that stink this year but hate each other, so that's always fun when there's like nothing on the line except pride. Look, you need to be diagnosed with a malady.

Come on, come on. What malady? Actually, I'm getting over a cold right now. I don't know if I sound as bad. I know what that is. You, this is sickness, what you've just said there. Yes, that's, all right. Five. Wait, can I give you two more OLLIs? Boston College, Syracuse, Dan, okay, sneaky rivalry.

They played each other a lot of times, like 70 times. And there is a doomsday ACC tiebreaker scenario where this game matters to the winning percentage of conference opponents, I believe. So, I don't know. Take that with a great. Make me watch that. For those that don't know, this is the second time

Washington State and Oregon State are playing this season. There's a team going for a sweep. Wait, what? Yes, that's why it's fascinating. That's why it's an OLLI. It's the Pact 12 Championship, I guess. Paul Bunyan's Axe is this weekend, Dan. Kentucky Louisville, two more teams that stink that are playing against each other.

Okay, I'll just give you a top five. Did you say Louisville stinks? Louisville does not stink. They don't stink. They only have four losses. I mean, contextualize it. They've lost both Browns. They lost Miller Moss.

Like, they're a shell of what they were. Yeah, they're pretty hurt coming into this game. So I appreciate just following the sport, unlike Jeremy. Yeah, they have a lot of injuries. I'll give you a top five. These are all going to be lame. Like, oh, the playoff with the team that is favored wins, there's a big playoff. OILIs are better in this list?

Yeah, because I like watching just the nastiest shit you've ever seen. You've got a malady. That's what I'd call the malady watching the-it's your list. So why wouldn't you have put the other ones in O-LI and the ones you like in the actual list? Number five. Let our guest speak. Because it's for the audience, too, Chris. Okay, I'm not going to go into details about Western Kentucky

and Maverick McIver getting hurt earlier this season to give you a reason to turn on ESPN Plus to watch them play Jacksonville State. But I will give you number five, the Iron Bowl. I don't know what this sounds. This is a foghorn? It's a fanfare. I can't hear it.

This game is huge. Auburn's kept big spreads tight in the Iron Bowl, the last few. weeks last few seasons. And this is the smallest this spread has been. And you got a head coach that still thinks he's got an outside shot at getting the job. He's doing funky things with a quarterback over there. This one's tight. Five and a half point spread. Huge CFP impact. Mike, excellent work by you in the gap there where Chris Cody, who's mailing it in this weekend has forgotten that Jessica needs the fanfare in order to know that she's nailed the joke.

She's waiting for the fanfare without the fanfare. She is doing the same comedy that Rich Davis is doing with Sock Puppet on ESPN. I was taken today seriously at work, but it seems as though the whole narrative around it being an off-day. Just farting turkey. Number four. Okay.

Number four. We'll go with Texas A&M, Texas. Winning in for Texas A&M in the SEC championship game. Same goes for Alabama in the Iron Bowl. There's a lot of road favorites this week, I will add. That's something maybe to keep an eye on. But look, I think Texas is not a bad football team. They've played in some terrible games. I think that Kentucky Point was

the low point of the season. And since then, they've gotten steadily better. But Texas A&M, aside from the first half against South Carolina, has just been really solid this year. I believe the point spread right now is Texas A&M is like a two and a half point favorite on the road at Texas. But would be a huge bummer for Texas. aimed them to stumble right before conference championship weekend against Texas, who they, of course, played for a very long time before they joined the SEC and then didn't play for like 14 years and now play again. Texas A&M's kind of had an interesting schedule inside of the SEC. There's a lot of ring teams in that conference, but, you know, Mizzou is like the toughest test, Texas A&M

as face. Like they've kind of avoided like the teeth. It would not, it would not be surprising to anybody if Texas beats Texas A&M based only on the fact that before the this season started, if I said to anybody listening, hey, who do you think has the better athletes? Your answer would be Texas. I mean, I don't agree. I think honestly, Casey Concepcion and Mario Craver and the portal are probably

the two best portal additions that any team made on offense. They both are top five in the SEC in receiving yards this year, and they're on the same team. Cassius Howell, I saw got named to awards list yesterday. He leads the SEC and sacks. He's got 11 and a half sacks.

Texas's star defensive player has 10 sacks, so he's right behind him. But I think Texas A&M is good. And Mike, you can only play the teams on your schedule. As you know, the conferences are too big. So we'll just obligatory conferences are too big right now. Number three. Number three, we'll go with sneaky, sneaky good one, Oregon, Washington. I don't feel like enough people are talking about the fact that this game could ruin Oregon's playoff hopes. They're a six and a half point favorite. I believe it is on the road, 3.30 on CBS Saturday. These teams have played each other over 100 times.

They are our rivals, of course. But Washington has lost a couple of brutal games, like games that just make you lose your faith in humanity. However, based on like the advanced analytics, they're only like 17th in FBI, which is pretty good. So Oregon, not a huge favorite in this game. And like I said, could completely upend the Big Ten postseason for them if they do lose. So that's going to be a very interesting one for Oregon,

especially coming off of like an emotional win against USC last weekend, which, by the way, I hope we have time to talk about USC's game notes that were going viral from that game because they were so embarrassing. I can't talk about all the things that she wants to talk about. Number two. Vanderbilt, Tennessee. Oh, there they are. Number one.

Dan, when you were covering Miami, I'm sure you had to read game notes all the time. I don't know if anyone. Jeremy's probably, Jeremy's down a beat. Game notes. A lot of professionals. You probably read them when they were like. like on typewriters. But anyways, if you want to get a kick out of something,

these are like, it goes. Unnecessary shot at me. They were not on top. You're right. It was macrofeesh. I think they were faxes. If you scroll down, it's like what you would say if you were like a message board poster about like what USC needs to do to win this game instead of just being like,

here's the head to head results against Oregon. It's just like they said we weren't gritty enough. They said we weren't tough enough. They said we couldn't compete with real Big Ten football. Did they see the final score? And then it's like, beating Iowa was a culture one. It's like, I've never seen this in game notes before. So it's been very funny.

Everything they said was absolutely right. Hey, Chris here. Black Friday game day is coming to Prime and it'll be an epic day of live sports. Black Friday football is at the center of it with the Chicago Bears taking on the Philadelphia Eagles at 3 p.m. That's followed by the final night of the Emirates Cup NBA group play and a doubleheader starting with the Bucks and Nix at 7 p.m. and the Mavericks and Lakers at 10 p.m. What a nightcap game that is. But the whole day starts with the return of the Capital One Skins game

as four elite PGA golfers face off with $4 million on the line. Black Friday game day tees off with Capital One Skins game at 9 a.m. Eastern before the Big Bears Eagles game at 3 p.m. And it culminates with a double dose of Emirates NBA Cup action featuring Bucks at 7 p.m. And Mavs Lakers at 10 p.m. Only on Prime. It's the holidays and the 50th anniversary of Miller.

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Tis Miller time. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories, and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Hey everyone, it's Jeremy here, and I want to talk to you about Black Friday Game Day, because Black Friday Game Day is coming to prime with an epic day of live sports. Black Friday football is back, with the Chicago Bears taking on the Philadelphia Eagles at 3 p.m. Eastern. That's followed by an Emirates NBA Cup double header. Bucks Nicks at 7 p.m. and Mavs Lakers at 10 p.m. And the whole day starts with the Capital One Skins game as four elite PGA golfers meet with $4 million on the line. Black Friday game day, the Capital One Skins game at 9 a.m., bears Eagles NFL action at 3 p.m. And the final night of Emirates NBA Cup group play with Bucks Nicks at 7 and Mavs Lakers at 10.

Only on Prime. Don Lebatard I don't like Smitty either Stugats Women stay home In the kitchen where they belong This is the Dan Levitar show With the Stugats

Are you ready to do your F1 minute Before number one This is the middle spot Fine Let's do it I'm not phoning it in this week. The race started at 11 p.m. Eastern, so I went to bed, but both McLaren's got disqualified. That's it.

So that's not you phoning it in. That's you mailing it in. That is just as bad as what I mean... faxing it in. mean, yeah, micro-fishing it in. The internet minute's got to be better than that.

What is number one? I'm not ready for the internet minute yet. She still wants to talk college football. Wait, she's not even a number. You don't let me. Number one. The egg bowl.

It's always stupid. Something stupid's going to happen. But it's funny. I mean, no Michigan, Ohio State, no Miami, Pittsburgh?

What list is this? Okay, but OLA, the game. I think it would be shocking to me if Michigan lost, but not that shocking. If Michigan won? If Michigan won, I mean, because, as we know, like, this is just Ryan Bage.

You did Morsok last year? Jeremy has got, Jeremy is the only person I hear predicting, no, it's going to happen to Ohio State again. Michigan's going to win. No matter how ridiculous you think that is. Look, we can agree that it's total chaos if that happens. Or Miami. Miami's the right U.S. If Mississippi State beat Mississippi.

Enough, Jeremy. Yes, it would be really bad for Miami. Be terrible. Well, time to get in it. It's... Jessica's. Internet Minute. People are saying 6-7 now. I don't know. That is not fair what you guys have done to me,

that you mail it in in a way that is unacceptable. It's disrespectful. You tell us, what are your thoughts on everything that happened there, including that wet sock calling Reese Davis Rich at the end of it? Why are you calling him a wet sock? Because that guy sucks. As a spokesman, look, man, Kim, if you're going to make it a made-for-television absurdity where the judges are on TV announcing why they're making their picks,

like have the people be entertaining, talented at television? Six-seven. He took a stab at entertainment with six-seven. Like, have the people be something that represents college football better than this guy in a sports code. I think he was absolutely spot on in all of his analysis on Tuesday night. So I think he did a great job. I think this joke was hilariously delivered, and I got a kick out of it. And Dan, we're talking about it now, the entertainment television program.

Guess what? Talk of the town Wednesday morning. Six, seven. Let's wish Jessica Thanksgiving here by emptying the file of Thanksgiving sounds here so that she can enjoy her holidays, however it is that she chooses to spend them. What do you have for us in the way of emptying the Thanksgiving file here and wishing the audience a happy Thanksgiving? I have Zion Williamson being asked his favorite side dish. Happy Thanksgiving. You get to go home tonight and then leave tomorrow evening.

Give us a little glimpse into what Zion Williamson's Thanksgiving looks like. Just spending some time. My mom, stepdad, my friends, little brother, older brother, and get on the plane and go into Memphis. What's your favorite dish? What you're looking for to eat the most? You're trying to set me up. No matter what answer I give, social media, going to clown me. So no comment.

I'm sorry. You know what? It's all love. Makes me sad. Yeah, it is sad. It's a poor choice by you. Speaking of Memphis, Navy Memphis on Thanksgiving, another one, American Conference Implications of Navy wins that game, although they would need some help to get into the

conference championship game. Dan, I heard a wonderful, beautiful clip of Maxian head coach legend Eddie George talking about his turkey. It was, I would say, quite sensual if you want to listen to that next. A deep fry my turkeys. It's done with the same oil over the last five years. So it's full of seasoning. It has the perfect seasoning, perfect everything with it.

And it's a 72-hour process, okay, and where it goes into a brine that's homemade. Then it sits in that brine for about two days, and then I take them out. Then I injecting, you know, with a homemade, injectable marinade. And then it sits for another 24 hours wrapped in the refrigerator. And all the marinade is getting into the juice. joints the juices and it's really getting into the breast and the thigh and so forth and then I take it out that morning on Thanksgiving and I dip it in the hot oil and then it's and it's delicious and it's going just like that you know I mean I can cut it with the plastic

butter knife is so tender mama did you say that to everyone or just me okay thank you Chris I appreciate that clip ending he said I'm hard is what he said I'm hard is what he said in my ear and I thought he said that on air none of it is helpful to me and as this is happening it did sound pretty good as this is happening

can you isolate breast and thighs that was pretty good that was so good that I almost forgot how terrified that guy was I want to put music under like central music under that let's do that before the end of the segment he kind of like smacks his lips at one point too yeah well he made all our mouths water but also during that Mike Ryan accused

Eddie George and Mike Ryan's the leading authority throughout the country reporting on these things of dying his goate he did you can see it on the base yeah you see like so does that does he lose a nasty man yeah he loses points with his sensuality less credible if he's dying his goatee correct

less authentic I mean the goatee looks good you know it's okay there's certain people that make it work and he's making it work right now and he can talk to me about turkey any day of the week before you go I would have assumed that your internet minute would have been it on and on either

the Campbell's Soup CEO or the Shamwow guy. I would have thought that those would have qualified for internet minutes. Apparently the sham wow guy is running for Congress in Texas to end wokeism. He's got my vote. Thank God. Have you seen?

Backro is sleeping. Holy shit, was that a delayed reaction? I thought you had moron. I was going to lay out for you. I didn't know if you had more. Have you seen this? The Shamwile guy. Patriot. Just like us. see you later jessica happy thanksgiving good seeing you check out her weekly notre dame podcast the echoes

with uh mike golic junior this is not not an echo chamber real podcast she's being oh there it is she's being awfully gentle about notre dame being ranked in perception uh better than miami uh it's got to be a little bit annoying for her and lucy to hear all of your miami talk that helped run them out of Miami because you talk about Miami so obnoxiously. If you've listened to this show, I haven't once caped up for Miami. You haven't?

What you did was Shuzin was disrespectful. Right, but we were just talking about a broadcast, but I haven't done a CFP ranking discussion today. I'll do that on Kane's Insight with D. Money and Peter O'Rease today, live at 1 p.m. Gary Furman.

Not a real podcast. Gary Furman, local legend? Yes or no? Gary Furman, Zaslo? No. You can't say that John Gruden's putting together her staff. Oh, he reported that wrong. That's a good callback. Jessica,

you're going to play. You're going to do the bucket with us here. You're going to suffer. Fine. Go ahead, Jeremy. What do you got? You got the Colts? I got the Colts hosting the Houston Texans. That defense is stingy. Let me remind everyone. The bucket is presented by Dentex. Ultimate Fantasy Football Punishment.

Learn more and sign your league up at dentec.com. Dominique Foxworth says that the Colts have a quarterback problem. A quarterback problem. What does he know? Dave Damasek convinced me the Texans are going to win. I'm putting it back. The Colts are four and a half point favorite at home. You're crazy.

That's a good favorite. I know it is. Shit. I got the Saints. Nice. I'm sorry. At Dolphins. That's the Dolphins.

So the Saints are a six and a half point dog on the road. They're terrible. The Dolphins are favored by six and a half against anybody. They're terrible. Go ahead, Mike. This is a very short Reaper this week. Cincinnati Bengals. Do I get Joe back?

You do. You get Joe back and Chase, and they're at Baltimore. You should keep it. No T. Higgins, though. They're seven and a half point dog. I like to call this game the Triptophan game. Where's your mouthpiece? All right.

Oh, I'm not crazy about it, but Packers. Jack White Concert. At Lions, Lions are two and a half-point favorite big games? That is? Big game or not a big game? Packers, Lions. Big Game or not a big game? Thanksgiving.

That's a big game. That's a big game. That is big game. All right, here you go, my first pick. I got the Tennessee Titans. Playing a little bit better. Playing a little better. Playing the Jags.

One way, Taylor. They're a good team. There's six and a half point dog at home. Jessica, think about who you want to pick for you, please. You want football? buddy do I watch football that's why I put it back no one's ever said Titans are playing better

she said that not me Jessica for the record I volunteer to pick for you if you need a helpful hand I got the Seattle Seahawks who play the Minnesota Vikings 10 and a half going favorites they're gonna beat that ass who's Minnesota's starting quarterback this week he sucks who is it though it's not it's not when so who is it

it's Brosmer isn't it the Minnesota who so I don't know who's starting for the Vikings at quarterback. Doesn't matter. I'm going to fly after Thanksgiving. I just told you. Jess, you want me to pick for you?

Yes. All right. I'm picking for Jess. Right here. This is Jess. First pull. Falcons. Sorry about that.

You're actually a favorite at the Jets. Two and a half point favorite. Yucky, no. Okay. Putting it back. A little rummage here for Jess. I go to the bottom here. The Titans.

Wow, I'm really sorry. Yes. Keep that. yeah i'm so sorry yeah Tony thinks they've been playing better but they're playing better i'm so psyched about this really i want you to lose so bad here let me do my pick now what i do you know what you did the raiders wow i am just picking awful helmets i'm gonna give you terrible pittsburg recommendations they're at the chargers a nine and a half point dog putting that back i know a valet who you should give your car too these three helmets i've picked like let's see if i get the jets

here it'll be an all-time bad four helmets the raiders again wow this is just awful yeah you who helped no one. Wow. I've had a terrible year at the bucket. Worst ever, they're saying. He owes three punishment still. It's about to be four. Yeah.

You're cursed. Yep. Next week, I'll sing the national anthem before show. Jessica, just so that we're clear on the disrespect, I thought you were asking us if the person's name was Bronson. I still don't know what the person. Max, what is his name? Brosmer.

Brasmer. Okay, I thought you were asking. I didn't sit and know you were telling us. No, it's okay. She speaks with a Thornton. Oh, my God. What happened? a spider in there.

They've got to with a spider in there. What a great guy. Please tell me, they have a video of that. Please tell me that we can show people how scared he's really got of that. He, oh my God, I hope the video caught that because that's legitimate fear

from Zaslo. I'm sorry they did that to you. Are there any more spiders in there, Reaper? Despite your lack of size, that was a good move. That's as scared. We're working on the instrument. We're working on the Instant replay. Zaslo, what did you get there?

I got the Bears. Wow, we really scared him. Eagles. The Bears? Black Friday game. Wow, the rare time he got a win with the Bears last week, but now put you back. I love the Bears to cover that. I got the Jaguars.

Nice. Jags, six and a half point favorite. Titans are playing better. Yes, Mike keeps saying that. Jessica, happy Thanksgiving. Thank you. I'm Golden Helmet. So I got one more week of Golden Helmet.

Good seeing you, Jessica. I don't like a trick. On Fox 1, you can stream your favorite live sports, so you're there for the biggest moments as they happen. For me, I cannot deal with spoilers, so I need to see it live, especially on college football Saturdays and NFL Sundays. With Fox 1, you get it all. NASCAR, the MLB postseason, edge of your seat plays, jaw-dropping moments, and that rush like you're right there in the action. Sports are meant to be watched live, and you can do that with Fox 1. Fox 1, we live for live, streaming now.

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Canada Life. Insurance, investments. advice. Don Levatard. I don't think I ever got that many roses in my whole life. Stugats. Certainly not from your lovely grandfather, God. May a soul rest in peace. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. That was a good trick. Daslow, that's as scared as I felt the energy of his fear. That was not bit. Look, I did not know until today's show that Zaslo is legitimately afraid of spiders. The Zaslo Show 2.0, no the.

No, though. Is available now wherever it is you get your podcast. And he has said that you cannot text him or in any way contact him through social media with a spider or he will block you. He's an affable person, but that is his line. It's because he legitimately fears the spider. I was shown before the show something, some quotes. I saw some good quotes in a couple of different stories that I reacted to differently. One was seeing the way Tim Kuhn, who's still doing excellent writing for ESPN, wrote about Bill Belichick, wrote about Bill Belichick in North Carolina, long form.

But also I saw some quotes from Lee Corso. And it made me sad for Lee Corso because he kind of misses game. day and I understand everything at the end. He got such a great sendoff. I was thinking to myself, it felt a bit like Ozzy Osbourne's sendoff where he gets the celebration at the end of his career and how lovely that we would be able to eulogize somebody while they're still with us, allow them the grace of aging on television and send him off with a goodbye that made both networks stop and genuflect, both of them in honor of what a mascot and voice he's been. But I haven't heard this sound. I've just read the quote. So play Lee Corso talking about now being away from

College Game Day. What has this season been like? Because it's the first one out of college football for you and what's probably felt like forever. What has it been like for you? Lousy. I hate it. I can't watch College Game Day. I mean, I just, I just can't get used to it. I'm not working anymore. I used to fly all over in Virginia, but I, it sucks. That made me sad. And why are you smiling? Do you understand how emotions work?

I hate it. It sucks was not the answer I was expecting. Because that's kind of like, it looks like he's outside of a restaurant, just a news guy. It's just kind of like a fun, like, hey, how's it going in retirement? He's just like a brutally honest of like, yeah. He's in a parking lot. Well, look, look. Bobby Bowden said famously, once upon a time, I don't want to retire.

There's only one event after retirement where your friends gather for you anymore and you're not alive to see it. Why can he throw a party? That's uncommonly honest. I feel I've wanted over the course of today's show, this is what I've wanted to do. I've wanted, before the end of the season, to do an honest University of Miami broadcast like the one Mike wants. so it's not Bob Wershuzin, but it's our show just during a game. Now you're talking. And also...

You wanted a mean as the turkey of the day? I want a mean as Turkey of the month. Turkey of the month. Oh, wow. What's a different graphic. Jessica might... Based on that F1 moment, that F1 minute... Moment. No, you had it right. F1 moment.

And her internet moment as well, not her internet minute. You liked that when we did that? No, I did not like... No, I don't like my employees. You said it a ball show. I'm like, I mean. No. Jessica's going to try. fear. It stunk. I don't like the employees corporate times stealing weasels to actively

not do their job well as an act of defiance. Yose will show you and the audience. We won't try even more. A mean embarrassed himself yesterday and I think that should be punitive. I think something should happen to him based on what it is they did. But then Jessica comes in and does the very same thing. Like why promise me an F1 minute if that's what you're going to do? She wanted so badly to talk about Texas A&M and Texas. And that's an interesting one. this weekend. Like of all of them... I don't trust this committee

if Texas wins this game. They can't jump all the way into the picture. I don't trust them. Over 16 to 10? Hey, you guys want some... You guys want some information? Oh, what?

I happen to know? Yeah. You have a happen to know. He happens to know? Great Scott. He happens to know. He happens to know. Gather everyone.

Get the children. He happens to know. So wise. It's funny every time. Florida was going down on the wire with this one battling, but I think the crushing realization that they are not going to get the guy they thought they were going to get for months on end. That's finally lapped upon their shores. I think they're pivoting.

Jedfish right now is a desired candidate. I mentioned Jetfish on ESPN 2, like a month and a half ago. By the AD, but the boosters have some other plan. Is it dabble clock? I think you're going to see a lot of big-time names. The boosters want sizzle because they missed out on Lane Kiffin. I don't think Jetfish, though I believe it, to be a good coach, liked him down here in Miami when he was here. That's not going to

please these boosters. I meant to ask Jessica, and I failed to do it, if anyone in our audience has any objection as the professionalization of college football makes it more and more, the second biggest sports business that there is in America, that when Mike Gundy gets blown out at one of these lower-tier jobs that's still a decent job, that the way that Oklahoma State very quickly tries to snap its fingers and fix, okay, let's get that Mike Gundy stink off of us is, let's just get North Texas's quarterback and North Texas's coach. They seem good at offense over there. Can we make it a slightly better thing here by just grabbing the smaller programs,

coach and quarterback? Some people listening to this are made uncomfortable by that as just a transaction. action, no? I mean, it follows logic. The quarterback stuff isn't out there, but I expect the quarterback to follow the head coach. I also expect the happens to know DC to follow. And that's a right move for Oklahoma State. They don't have T. Boom Pickens around anymore. They're going to have to win inside the margins, get one of these guys that is going to use them to launch pad themselves and do a bigger job. That's a reality for Oklahoma State. It's not a reality that was there for them at the turn of the century for several years when they had a huge power broker in the sport. T. Boom Pickens goes away, they're kind of outgunned. So this is a great hire for them. Jamal Hill is going to join us here in a little bit. Jeremy Tashay is under the best of circumstances. His heat analysis can be both very informative and too much to handle.

So Jeremy Tashay wanted everyone to know that Tyler Hero in his last game where he had 24 points and zero assists tied an NBA record for made floaters in that game. He made an NBA record. I did not know that we were tracking made floaters, but he made eight floaters. And so Tyler Harrow, in his return to the Miami Heat as an All-Star, a career, or no, I'm sorry, a tying of any game played throughout history since we started tracking floaters.

I'm guessing that's fairly recent, the tracking of floaters. Yeah, that's in the NBA tracking era, the shot tracking era, but eight of nine on floaters in that game. And I believe that tied C.J. McCollum and J. Lynn Brunson in their careers. Those are the only other two guys who have ever made eight floaters in a singular game. That was his first day back. And they normally say, you know, timing with that is a little bit difficult. Most people know that set, though.

It's like DiMaggio. Do you want another stat though? Who are the most floaters in a game? How many threes did McCollum make last night? Because I saw he had 45. It's got a lot. He had 45 threes. That's higher than average.

46. He had 10 threes last night. How about this stat? Per Brett Usher? Qualified players in NBA history to average a double-double with a steel per game, a block per game, and 40% from three. Larry Bird in 1984-85 and through 18 games, Kelle Ware, this season. That's a good stat.

There was actually an interesting heat set that Jeremy showed me. I say this as if I'm surprised. You sound surprised. Well, because the Miami Heat. You watch any games yet this year? No, not yet. I'm getting to it, though. Oh, no, I saw one that was on Amazon Prime.

It was an NBA Cup game and they didn't win. NBA Cups tonight, too. You know what's crazy? I looked it up. The main tiebreaker in the NBA Cup is head to head. So the Miami Heat are running the least amount of pick and rolls in the league by a lot. And that's crazy. They're going to set an NBA record.

Because I'm pretty sure if Bam out of bio gets a statue outside of the arena, it's going to be that dribble handoff. Oh, you shut your mouth. Also, when your signature move is a dribble handoff. It's not. It would be the block on Tate. Put it on the poll at Lebitard show. should BAM statue be a handoff? Come on, it's his signature move, the dribble handoff.

Kirk Goldsbury says of the heat, quote, Miami's doing something completely different. Will teams around the NBA start to copy this like they copied elements of the Spurs or Dantone's systems? That's what the nerds are talking about. And Stan Van Gundy has said of Khalil where his development has been fun to watch. This was on Zach Lowe's podcast. Their last seven or eight games, he's been as dominant as any big in the league. This is a legit leap happening right before our eyes is what Stan Van Gundy is saying on the Zach Lowe podcast.

But here is the instant replay finally of Zaz being legitimately scared by a spider in the bucket. He is indeed horrified. Play this because this is as scared as I've ever felt someone be in our environment. He jumped away from me. I felt his energy. No, it's okay. She speaks with a thornbony. Oh, my God.

What happened? There's a spider in there? That is the brave Jonathan Zaslow, the face of bravery. Face of a sucker. It's the holidays and the 50th anniversary of Miller Light. Holidays are all about gathering around with family and friends, so why don't you bring out a cornucopia of that beautiful white can Miller Light or draft, whatever it is.

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