The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: The Big Stinger Guy (feat. Dave Dameshek)

Episode Date: January 9, 2026

"You don't tell me." After Dameshek delivers his totally-not-yammering analysis of the upcoming NFL Playoff weekend, Dan begs the crew to find a historical comp for Lane Johnson. It's actually kind of weird how much he feels the need to find one. Like, what's that about? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is the Dan Levatore show with the Stucats podcast. The SEC 1 and 8 versus Power 4 teams. What a fraud conference, man. The whole thing, just fraudulent. Miami beats, I mean, Miami beats two, one loss, SEC teams that are supposed to be the cream of the crop and Ohio State. So those are supposed to be the best teams, and Miami beat all of them. And the country saw last night. This is the funny thing about the underdog tail and the lovable Trinidad Chambliss is that everyone watched that game.

It was like, oh, my God, Miami's just mauling them. Just physically mauling them. You can't be running 17 yards to carry. Everything's second and two. They're just going to hold the ball all game. So we're not starting with Damashik and NFL predictions. We should. You're right.

Let's speed Damashik up and get the five most interesting things going into this weekend. Are you ready, Damashik? I'm ready. So give me what you've got on Jacksonville because Dominique Foxworth and many others are saying the Jags are and Tony. The Jags are clearly and obviously better than the bills. It will surprise no one. Hold on a second. Wait.

Dominique Foxworth said that? What? Stealing your boy stuff, man. What? Dominic just said on his podcast that it's obvious to him and clear to him that the Jags are better than the bills. It should be obvious to everyone. Said that like six weeks ago. Damashek, is it obvious to you?

What's obvious to me is that the two best teams in the AFC are both from the AFC South. Jacksonville Jaguars, Jaguars, please, not Jaguars, please. And the Houston, Texans, those are your two best teams. And as far as the Jacksonville game goes on the other sidelines, Sean McDermott, a lot of noise about Josh Allen. But if they lose this game, I think McDermott's out. So don't rush to hire John Harbaugh if you're the Dolphins or otherwise if you like Sean McDermott a little bit better. Next, the Jenga pieces are back for the Eagles. The Jenga theory is, of course, if you remove the wrong piece, the whole thing's going to implode.

The Eagles have one on defense. His name is Jalen Carter. He's back, as you already know. The offensive jenga piece for the Philadelphia Eagles is Lane Johnson. He's back. That equals not just a victory over the diminished 49ers. It equals a visit to Santa Clara for Super Bowl 60 with a shot at repeating. Next, talking about the coach.

and Carousel and all of that. Just because they survived the Ravens on Sunday night does not mean Tomlin's in the clear. They need to win this game or they're still out in the land of ambiguity at least. I think in March, I would not be surprised if he moved on if they do not win this game. Next up, as far as that goes, the loser of Sunday night football, had they won that game, the Ravens. What is the buzz about them? Because everybody is now declared because everybody has to react to name brands. And Josh Allen, this is his year to do it. Are we now picking the Ravens to go through the AFC and win that? I think there would be a decent case to be made. There'd be expectations for MVP Lamar Jackson to be MVP Lamar Jackson, even though the reason

they weren't as good and Harbaugh got fired is because this year he was not MVP Lamar Jackson. By the way, as far as Harbaugh goes, his great success is remarkable how durable it was and how consistent he was. But don't forget that there is a sort of biblical, I'm going to refer back to the Bible once again. But replacing Justin Tucker with that rookie who missed the kick, Justin Tucker is the reason the Ravens were relevant and in the playoffs, a lot of seasons. I mean, now everybody else has a good kicker. But at the time, he was winning them games they otherwise wouldn't have. Keep that in mind when you're falling all over yourself to get John Harbaugh.

And lastly, where I ended the last segment. I know that people are concerned. They're great. Their empathy doesn't want them to put too much pressure on Josh Allen or Matthew Stafford or C.J. Stroud. Take it easy. The sample sizes are small. You can't judge them based on that.

But keep in mind, that's what's great about the playoffs. It's the whole point. They only give out one Lombardi trophy at the end of every year. And that's what makes it so compelling is the severity of it. it. And keep this in mind, it was always hard to win a Lombardi trophy, as Dan Marino can tell you, and Jim Kelly and Fran Tarkington. But right now, there is no math that allows for Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson and Joe Burrow and Patrick Mahomes to get another one, at least one more before he goes on, and Brock Purdy and C.J. Stroud. And by the way, I think Bo Nicks and the Broncos are going to

the Super Bowl. How about this sophomore class, if I'm right, or Drake May does it, or Caleb Williams goes to the Super Bowl. Their early entry into the conversation, the greatest draft class of all time. Jaden Daniels was in the title game a year ago. He had to sit it out from injury. We're already at that level if one of or more than one of those cats makes a run here in the next few weeks. Why don't you believe that Trevor Lawrence and the Jags? The most impressive convincing thing to me that I have seen in football the last six weeks was the Jags going to Denver and dragging that defense with Sartan. So why are you doing this where you make that? Legitimately, there's been some impressive stuff the last two months.

The Rams can be undefeated. Five weird one-score losses makes it totally possible that they go through the road and get to the Super Bowl, and no one would be surprised by that. No one at all would be surprised by that. I don't know why you're doing this with Denver when Jacksonville seems that, unless Houston's defense can stop Jacksonville, it seems fairly obvious that Jacksonville's better than anyone in the AFC since making a trade that changed their wide receivers forever.

I mean, it's a very close call. I'm not the only person. I think all of Football America is pointing at that game. Buffalo and Jacksonville is the toughest call of this weekend. You know, I am riding with for 60 minutes here, one superhero performance from Josh Allen. I completely agree. Trevor Lawrence has out-dued Josh Allen in a side-by-side over the last six weeks or so.

He's been the better quarterback. I am just, this is not based on anything intellectual. I am going with the gut. I think Buffalo survives that one. I can tell it's not intellectual. I can tell it's not intellectual. Going with your guts. Going with your gut.

Might put you on the side with tone. I'm telling people to go to football America and your thing. I get it. Listen, I also think that once in a while, the superhero effect does, it is not, again, durable. You're not going to ride it. Buffalo is not going to the super. Your prediction. Your prediction from the most hard-to-predict game of the weekend is I'm going with my gut damage check.

I love that. When it's that close, what are you going? Are you doing a spreadsheet on it? It's a very narrow call to make, and I am leaning with the known entity here. And I know I'm being a little bit of a hypocrite for a number of reasons. I also think that Jacksonville is one of those teams that. America for self-identifying football fans, a lot of people could not name more than three guys off that roster.

Do you. Everybody knows Forever Lawrence. And I think there is some momentum from football. No, their offenses. Oh, come on. They've got a good offense, man. Liam Cohen's a very good coach. I completely agree.

Liam, by the way, as I'm talking about John Harbaugh and Sean McDermann and all these retread guys, who would you hire if you fired Mike Tomlin? You fired John Harbaugh. Who are you going to replace them with? These guys are the straws that stir the drink. Kyle Shanahan in San Francisco is more important than Brock Purdy is. KOC in Minnesota is more important. Ben Johnson clearly was more important in Detroit than Dan Campbell or Jared Gough is.

And now the same is true down in Jacksonville. Instead of a retread, go and get yourself one of these clever OCs like Liam. He was a punchline because of his press conference a year. we go. They tried that. They tried that. Keenan McCardo. Okay.

You're on a nice roll there. Maurice Jones Drew. You guys are going to keep doing this with 90s Jags? Tony Buselli. San Bouseli. Jacksonville is the best team. Thank you, Dan. It seems like you agree with Dominique.

Well, I just can't, it's not just the best team this weekend. Jacksonville's the best team, and it's not, like, if you've been watching what they've been doing the last six weeks, In the AFC, they're the buzz saw offense, and unless Houston's defense can stop them. Dan, your refusal to believe in the Denver Broncos is astonishing to me. Well, it's because of what I saw them do at Denver. It's what I just saw. I have to do it again at Denver. Okay, but they made it look pretty easy.

Mark Brunel. Last thing, Damashek, I wanted to ask you, because I think much of the coverage around football is silly. but when we get into the numbers and the business of sport, you've got to have value at left tackle, you've got to have value at quarterback. Generally speaking, Trent Williams is regarded in San Francisco as the most indispensable offensive linemen there is. However, in Philadelphia, every time Lane Johnson plays,

they win and win the championship, and when he doesn't, they stink and they lose. How is it that more people don't understand that Lane Johnson is a game-changing machine as much as A.J. Brown or any, like, if we're going to make Jason Kelsey famous, how have we made this person's excellence not understood? The reason they win championships is when that guy plays right tackle, not left tackle. Tony Brackens.

The other side of that is who was the kid, the really tall white guy that they took who had, was it Matt Jones? Matt Jones. Wow. Listen. Six-six wide receiver. Dan, I think. Coke, I think.

I think the problem is that I find it, the thing that I point to, there's a pretentious football fan, is the person who starts to tell you about how good an offensive lineman is. Most of us, most civilians cannot correctly identify a good offensive lineman versus a mediocre one. We can tell the bad ones because you can see the guys running by them. But beyond that, when people start letting you know about how good Tony Bisselli was, you know that that person is full of crime. They could not watch film and why.

They could not watch film and tell you, oh, that guy's going to be great in the NFL. Look at that guy playing at Texas right now. He's a dominant left guard. You have no ability to articulate or to identify who's good or merely okay at what they're doing. That being said, I completely agree with you

about Lane Johnson. Look at the results. I think that you will see at the end of this weekend if there is anyone who isn't aware of Lane Johnson's effect. I suspect that they will learn it based on Sequin Barclay and company having a day against the San Francisco 49ers, like I say, diminished rush defense. I also think right tackle. Daniel J. Aramai and I have talked about this a lot over the years, name drop. Left tackle is important, but if you're right-handed, if you're not Mark Brunel or Dave Damashet throwing with the left men. The music's over. That's it.

Once we've gotten to that is going to drop. You've run that material. By the way, I said Paul for the Dolphins was good week three. So don't say that I can't see Cal. Football America is the name of the podcast. I can say things too, Chris Cody. He doesn't make them accurate. I can just throw out a bunch of crap about how great that offensive lineman is.

All right, kicking things off with Smearnoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number of vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smeard off. Wow, you're on the money with Smeard off. Chris, you know what goes great with Smeard off. Smyronoff? Yes, but I'm really talking about game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe.

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Smyrnav! No purchase necessary must be legal U.S. resident 21 or older. Sweep steak starts 1215, 2025, at 12. Eastern and ends 1-23-2020-6 at 11.59.59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website. Happy New Year, everybody. 2026 is already getting off to an incredible start because you want to know how I rang in the new year. It was with a bunch of friends in a Dallas hotel lobby bar ordering a bunch of Miller Lights because that's how you do it. That's how you make special memories. Miller Light has been by my side and many special football memories this year. And hopefully we get to write a few more memories with Miller Light.

Some of my most legendary moments have started that exact same way. A buddy's house, a lobby bar, a game, no big plan. And then you crack open a Miller Light. You take a sip and you look around, and you immediately recognize that you made the right call. Legendary moments start with Miller Life. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller Lite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Don Lebatard. Football. Football. Football.

Football. Football. Football. Football. Football. Stugats. Football. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats.

You and your toy Jesus get out of here. If people want more coverage, they can find you on Football America. Thank you. Oh, we got a beauty coming for you today. Yes, it's a lot of fun what is approaching with these playoffs. I did want to, I actually wanted to, and we couldn't get to it because he talks too much. I wanted to find what would be the historical comp for, what do you mean there's an offensive lineman out there who wanders the earth and they win championships? And the champions always win in tough guy Philadelphia when he's tougher.

than everyone else at offensive line play so good at it that he's a right tackle who everyone in football knows is whatever Trent Williams is a left tackle. What's the historical comp for a human being who's running through football that way? And shouldn't that be the guy, the guy who has to block Max Crosby successfully? Should that not be the guy who is the guy who gets to be the king of football? More than Patrick Mahomes or anyone else. The guy who every time, Jason Kelsey, famous because he was one of the five guys on that line, but all the other four guys on that line go? No, that's the guy who's the biggest of the guerrillas. Give me the historical comp for an offensive lineman that gives off of that. I don't have one. Like, I don't, I believe

this person should be a lot more famous than he is. I believe the idea of somebody being a mauling right tackle is a mauling right tackle who wins championships because the chiefs are not physically strong enough to deal with whatever that thing is. because we talked to Lane Johnson. He laughed. He laughed. He's like, yeah, I needed a babysitter for a while because of, you know, the performance enhancers. There's rage control, impulse control issues. There's a person playing for the Philadelphia Eagles, the champions, who makes Sequin Barclay a lot better, who every time he plays, Damas Sheck and everyone else is saying, yeah, the Eagles won the championships.

You've been talking about all year, but they're going to go back to being the thing that has five cement mixers and just choose up offense. and what's so weird about, why isn't Jaylon, why is Jalen Hurts have so many three-in-outs? Oh, because Lane Johnson's not playing. Is there a better first name for an offensive lineman than Lane? You create lanes. I was thinking about this the other day with Gainwell. That's a good name for a running back.

I'm like, is it the best name for a running back? And then I'm like, no, Chase Brown is, because he's telling you from the back of his uniform the verb you have to do to catch it. This guy's a writer. Chase Brown is. Come on. Those are both great. Well, Gainwell's easy.

Chase Brown is, for a running back name, Chase Brown. Chase Brown is great. In terms of first names, though, for an offensive line in Lane, crazy that he's the most important lane in football. Lane Kiffin isn't even the most important lane in football. Damashek, since he's still there, can you answer my question? What's the historic comp? Why is he still here?

I love it. Give me the historic comp for Lane Johnson, because I don't have it in the room here. Boy, now see, now I've been put on the spot. I should have just turned my laptop off when I had a chance. because I don't have the answer myself. He didn't know how. You should have asked. Patrick Paul, maybe? The toy Jesus.

Jimmy Smith, by the way. See, Amin's got the answers. Let's lean on him. I'm trying to think of the, I'm trying to run through in my head in Super Bowl era where the strength was the O-line. The reason I'm bringing this up, the only reason I'm bringing this up is Damashik really loves football. He really knows football. And as much as he knows and loves football, I think he might love football history even more than that. And I think it's unfair in a game of violence and real estate acquisition that the linemen

don't get enough attention, but now Jason Kelsey has a talk show. But the biggest beast in the business is Lane Johnson. And I don't feel like enough people understand what that means and I don't have a comp for him at all. James Stewart. At all. I don't have any comp for him, not one. Natron means. There's one for you, I mean. Dan, I completely hear you. But do you hear my point that I think it's we are detached from it. We can't really, we try to celebrate. I mean, I grew up as did you with people talking about, well, Anthony Munoz, everybody knows he's the greatest left tackle. Everybody gets that, like, well, based on what? Because the experts tell us that, beyond that, we don't really have the ability to divine that with our own eyes. I think that's why it's a little

bit unsatisfying for us to try and celebrate offensive linemen because deep down, most of us understand we don't get it. Reggie Barlow. America is the podcast. Now, get out of here. Just close your laptop and get out of here. Tony, what game are we playing here? I'm trying to help you, Dan. Is Jonathan Ogden a good one? Well, but the reason that I'm doing, it's okay. Look, so I don't know if you guys noticed or not, but is it Diego Pounds the left tackle for Mississippi? Because Ruben Bain was shut down last night, and I didn't think that was a possible thing. Now, they moved him around, and I don't know the specifics of whether or not, because I haven't broken down film. I don't know whether Bain was

being moved to avoid the fact that he wasn't getting pressure or whether they were just moving him around strategically. We may not have seen it, but according to Kevin Clark, Ruben Bain had more pressures, six than anyone on either team last night. So he may not have had the sacks. He may not have had the big tackles that you noticed, but he did have six pressures. I'm with Dan, though. I didn't notice him a lot. There's a lot of scheme stuff happening too, though, right? Like Old Miss is very good at getting rid of the ball quickly and trying to make things happen. So what's the easiest way to get to neutralize a pass rush? throw the ball out where he can't get there.

So that's just been quick. You guys saw what the first quarter was of that game, okay? Miami had the ball the entire first quarter, and then the second quarter starts at Mississippi. Ole Miss is up 7-3 because they get a 73-yard run. Okay, it's the longest run against Miami since 2017. Miami had allowed only a 30-yard rush against Notre Dame as the longest run. A total fluke of a play.

Like a fluke of a play that hasn't happened in eight years. This defense is violent and good. know this. It's not up for question. But when Bain last night is quieter than he was in any of the previous two games, and he spoiled us, and many of the games played this season, six pressures, you are correct. Good game. For mortals and, but no, this guy is supposed to be tougher than all the other guys. And the biggest advantage Miami had last night was defensive line. They've got two first- I like that Dan had to just, I like that Dan just had to move from his left hand to his right hand because it looked like he was picking my giant nose

for the viewers out there. David Garard. Maybe edge of James for the game we were playing. To that point though, Dan, Akeemezdor got hurt also and that's a big part of their line. Then came back. Did probably put a knee brace on his elbow. I wondered what they shot him up with.

Did you guys, I mean, there's... He was like on the ground, like shaking. No, he shouldn't have been on the field. Would you see how hard his elbow hit the helmet? And then a 500-pound guy landed on in an awkward way? Like, that guy's a beast. Would we actually want to know the science of just, hey, take me with a camera to find out what Messador just had to do to get back in this game? It's a very long needle.

Might it have just been a stinger and he didn't actually need anything? It's called vitamin T. That's not how that stingers work. No. Like, I don't know how good. Stingers don't work your arm going the wrong way on somebody's helmet. Big stinger guy? I look forward.

Well, no, I'm not a big stinger. All right. Chris. No, I'm not a big stinger. You hit me with, that's not how stingers. work. Chris? Okay. I did hit you with this and then you came back at me with big Stinger guy, are you? Your stinger friends. No, but being in locker rooms and talking to athletes about how stingers work. There you go. I know. I don't know about stingers. Look, just when we don't understand

what we're watching in football, because we don't in terms of what the physical pain is, the stinger is low on the list and if it happened to me, I would be a coward. It's why Christobal is more of a man than I am. So when I asked the questions about what is a stinger, usually, and look, there were a lot of violent hits in that game, a number of them, and a number of guys were going off the field with what looked like stingers because of the nature of the collisions. A stinger usually doesn't happen because someone has Hulk Hogan leg dropped on the right side of your elbow when it's on the back of its arm.

That's just ignorance from you. It's not because I'm a stinger guy, it's because you sound like an idiot asshole. Blaine Gabbardt. I've had a stinger where, you know, a couple minutes later, you're like, all right, I'm ready to go. How is he still here? How? Bigger than ever. Go nights.

Why is Dan Mischek still here? Football America is coming up. You should check out Football America. I don't feel like we've covered the NFL well enough today. Jack Del Rio. He was the guy who wanted the axe in the room. And then the punter hit himself in that. He tried to do it.

And he almost cut his leg off. The Jacksonville Jaguars, everybody. The team whose logo is a jaguar with a sick blue tongue. What's going on? What disease does that Jaguar have that is tongue turned blue? Teal. I'm worried about him. My word association with Jack Del Rio is me at the Bristol Hotel.

A couple seats over at the bar, not saying anything to him, just kind of keeping an eye on him. Just observing him. At that double tree? Yeah. What do you want to talk about? You said we haven't covered the NFL playoffs well enough. What do you want to talk about? Dennis North Carolina.

We've done, we've got. Former Olympic sprinter. Keep it moving. Damashik. And Raiders wide receiver. Damashik, when he hits you with the North Cut, you just let it go and keep it moving. You can't break character. You just have to keep it moving.

You don't tell me. Get him out of here. All right. Just get him out of here. He tried. No, he's just not giving me the timing I need today. And you need to get him out of here because he's haunting me and I don't want him around. Costa la vista.

Mazel to have. Unikanez. Cuidado, Fernando. I called him last week a yammering knob. He's a yammering. You told him that last second? I love him. If you think I'm just going to sit here and take that.

I mean, I will. Lewis won't take him away. I keep telling Lewis, get him out of here. I can't physically get him away. Estos to pinga. Oh, come. I wonder where the always had to beat that to him. For sure.

Really, Lewis. Lewis, really, really, really, Lewis. Damashik, do you realize how bad you are at this, Damachette, that it would be so obvious that everyone here would be really. A pinga joke, there it is. That clearly had to be Lewis. Does he know what you can always hear Lewis's writing when it comes through other people? Me Gusta Luis.

I like Luis. All right. Please leave the premises. Thank you, Damashek. Football America's name of the podcast. And the people who enjoy the network that we are building, David Samson, I don't know how it is that he is still working the way that he is because of what it is that he's going through.

But nothing personal. Pablo Tori finds out. And Damashik's Football America, they are fun, different shows. And so I urge you today to support the one. that he's doing in record numbers so that Damashik's following can continue to grow. But please get him out of here.

Like, remove him from my... Just to win! Here we go, Steelers. Here we go, Hoosiers! I'll get out of here. Tony, can you just help me spiritually? How do I manage Damashek, who is an

uncontrollable scourge? Whether it's garlic breath or just yammering knob, you can't get him to shut up. You can't, but sometimes he's got good stuff to say. So, like, you want to keep him around just in case he's got a gem in there, but then he gives you, like, three minutes of penguins talking. I smile.

I love when Damashik joins. The problem is what Tony's saying, though. He doesn't have judgment about what's interesting. So he thinks everything he's saying is interesting and 10% of it is. Right. And then you get that 10% and you're like, oh, that was good. But he doesn't know which is the 10% and which is the 90%. He doesn't know the difference.

It's the problem. He's got a judgment problem. You guys don't get it. And you do? I do. I get Damashek, and I love him. What are you getting? Just that he's doing, like, it's just his schick, man.

Yes, he's going to ramble, but it's just great. I love it. The best when, like, you're, when you say something to him, and it's like, I'm the damn it. It's like going down a water slide. Dips and turns and, oh. Don Lebertard. In terms of heat fans, you're the most irrational of us right now.

What's the pivot? Oh, irrational. Stugats. Oh, my irrational. You don't hear your voice there? Your voice. If I were making a cartoon thing that was meant to symbolize irrational, that's the voice I would give. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats.

It's more like Space Mountain. I was just over there over the weekend. Over the week with my daughter for the first time. She wasn't on Space Mountain. I was. But you forget how dark it is. 20 MGs? No, no, no.

Stone cold. Like Steve Austin, baby. So you're there on Space Mountain. But the thing is it's dark. It's in the dark. It's the worst ride ever. So you're there, you're like, oh my neck. Most overrated ride ever.

Overrated? No way. I don't like it. I want to see what I'm doing. No, I like the uncertainty. You know it's just Thunder Mountain, but dark. Same track. It's built exactly the same way.

I don't know if that's true. I'm not sure if that's true. I'm not to fact check that. Well, when you go to the start. Put it on the poll, please at Levitard show. Our Space Mountain and Thunder Mountain exactly the same thing designs except for Space Mountain is just. in the dark. Doesn't Space Mountain do loops?

No loop. No loop. No loop. I didn't think what Jeremy was saying was accurate. He did seem to think that he, what he was saying was accurate. And once he did that, I'm assuming he knows, because he had the Eric... He's furiously Googling right now. I definitely think. Google AI answers

the question, no. Space Mountain and Big Thunder Mountain are not the same. Google AI. They're distinct Disney roller coasters with different themes and experiencing though both are offering thrilling with multiple tracks in some locations. Jeremy, why would you feel the need to give misinformation like that as the woke person that you are where you just came out confidently with something that you...

Because I'm trying to move to the other side of the Venn diagram, Dan. He wants to be on the cool side, Dan. The issue is that if he gives that... Just start spewing nonsense. If he wants to give that take, he's got to double down and completely own the take, right? If you say, hey, Space Mountain and Thunder Mountain are exactly the same, you got to own that thing to you die. I mean, like, I did all of the tracks on Thunder Mountain. I did all of the tracks on Space Mountain.

It does say that there are some... track similarities, but they are not the same. Yeah, but I would say they are the same and then double down on it. That's how you get to the other side. And then I tell you to look it up. I don't look it up. And then I tell you to believe. You don't even need to look it up. I did it. How about that? I did it. It's rare around here, though, that anyone

says something with conviction and then five people look at them and say, that's not right in any way. And you... They don't know. Well... There you go. Yeah. I've got Disney every summer for the last 30 years. Okay, now you lost it. No, it's true. It's building there. You gave us your bona fide.

You're building it. I mean, what I would like to know because I believe in the most wonderful way possible that our show over the next week is going to be an obnoxious embarrassment of being whatever it is Miami was 20 years ago and what it was 10 years before that. So I cannot talk enough about this football game last night because of how funny the entirety of it is. because it was one, like the business of all this over the last five years, pandemic spending, Lane Kiffin's worth this, Crystal Ball's worth this, who can get the, who can run around the inner cities and round up the best guys to be tougher than the best guys in the SEC because we're doing this. Quiet as it's kept really cheap because the payrolls are only $20 million,

only $20 million when that's what it costs to be Ohio State. That's what it costs to be Miami. You tell me Lane Kiffin is super important. saw no evidence of it yesterday. The team that was better, the team that looked the best coached was the one that was totally overmatch and still in the game. Because it wasn't making penalties and it wasn't throwing the ball when it clearly should be running the ball. When Mississippi realized, when Ole Miss realized they couldn't run the ball anymore, which they realized when they had 74 yards rushing and all of it was on one run, they said, okay, we're not going to run the ball anymore and our running backs out with a hamstring. The team that was better coached yesterday lost. And barely, because they were totally overmatched and had no business being in that football game. I will say this, Golding is going to be a very good coach in college football. Like what he did to rally the troops and get those guys focused and playing good football, I was really surprised by Golding.

I was like, man, this guy gets it. They showed his background of playing D2 and then going here and then go in there and going Alabama, coming back. And it's like, this guy gets it. So I'm excited to see what Pete Golden Essend. Why are you giving Ole Miss better coached yesterday just because of the missed? Like the penalties? We're disciplined. No, I'm just saying if the way.

that we do this, just the way that we do, right? It's not just the penalties, right? If I, that was a disaster football game that Miami played. They had drops and penalties. I just don't know if that's coaching. No, but so Chris, let's start here. Wherever it is, the discipline resides on how it is that you measure, all of these guys study all week at like military complexes to not false start twice

because the game plan is this week. Here's the advantages we have going in, guys. Ole mess, they're not as big as us. We're going to grind them to dust with Fletcher. It's going to be really easy. It's second and three all game. Just don't make mistakes. Don't make mistakes.

More penalties in one game than they had in the previous three combined when you need to be disciplined this time of year. Mississippi can't convert a third down. Overwhelmed in every way physically along the offensive and defensive line, but somehow still has four sacks even though he shouldn't have any. Beck's playing a different game than most quarterbacks. He just sits back there with the ball. He just sits back there and he's got plenty of time.

The sacks he took is because he's holding the ball. all too long. Like it's everything is scheme to have Beck have success in that game and Beck did good game managing and then bailed out the entire coaching staff and the entire city on that last drive because Miami overwhelmingly physically superior the entire game now had a tired team and defense that had 90

plays run on it and yet still with 18 seconds left who goes right down the field and is throwing into your end zone. It ain't the poorly coached team. Right. It was terrifying with those 18 seconds left on the clock because you were looking and being like, it can't happen like this. It cannot end like this where they go down the field.

18 seconds, no timeouts? They had one. They had one timeout, I think. And while that last drive offensively was pretty perfectly executed by Miami, there were several drives earlier in the game where it felt like the play calling was like out of nowhere. It was like they're dominating. They're running the ball for seven, eight yards of character.

The flea flicker was crazy. A flea flicker. What do you do? Why are you pulling? The Malley Cat on 3rd and 4 when you're at the 20-Y- Monday morning quarterback's here. If that flea-flicker works, it's a genius play call. But why would you do it? It was an intentional grounding.

It was an intentional ground. You've been running the shit out of the ball. They were just dominated. It just felt like they could have won by a lot more. I actually did find myself rooting for Miami last night. And I was sitting there going like, what in the world is going on here? Why are you not just running the ball down their throat? Exactly right.

Jeremy? ETR established a run. He's getting closer to our side. Chris, it's usually pretty rare that you're watching a football. game at college football and you're like, oh, this team's just better than this one, just physically better. It's because time of possession, you're just watching it's second. It can be second and three all game if you just don't do holding and you just don't do false smart. There was, like, Miami shot themselves in the foot so many times in that game.

I'm not, I just am like, what we're doing here of like whether that's coaching or not. Chris, that's the part that I'm. All right, let's just do it this way. Any game throughout sports and football you've ever seen the entirety of your life because McDermott's going to lose his job here in a second. It's going to be over 13 seconds. Any game in your life you've seen the entirety of your life. Beck scores that touchdown. Unless you return the kick for a touchdown,

you're not throwing in the end zone of the game from 20 yards away because you allowed the other team to get down the field in 18 seconds and you had to call timeout because your entire secondary doesn't know what it's doing. You have to call timeout, precious time out, because you've got to make sure, hey, guys, don't give them another seven yards here because they're just going to get even closer. And like, what you saw at the end of that game last night

was an apocalypse of defensive coaching, an apocalypse that if they'd lost that game, any coach in America would have been run out of town for allowing Trinidad Chambliss to go with one time out 18 seconds the length of the field and throw into your end zone and get a plausible pass interference call and now they win the game one yard running in from the end zone because you couldn't stop them in 18 seconds.

How many more ways would you like me to prove to you that Mississippi was better coached yesterday? Because that example alone at the end of the game is enough to get coaches fired. I mean, I'm with you. Like, you get blamed. When bad results happen, the coaches get blamed. You know, I think there is a debate to have on whether the coaches are actually blamed for that or whether it's just bad execution.

Why do you think Cristobal wasn't accepting those hugs? He knew there were 18 seconds left. No, I'm with you. It was a weird game. So we're not getting crystal ball. Again, maybe. I would take the under. Zaz can get him.

I do like the premise of us pitching him. Like, we will kick, like, Dan will be in the penalty box. Just so Tony will do it. Not allowed to talk. It'll be Mike and Tony. Get Mendoza. This is what I want to do. I want, if they win the national championship,

because obviously they lose, he's not going to play along. But if they win, I want Dan in, like, some sort of clown outfit and Christopher hurling pies at his face or in a dunk tank, one or the two. Maybe a dunk tank, and then instead of hitting baskets like we did in Milwaukee, we got to hit a football, you got to throw a spiral and hit the thing, ding, and drop Dan into a thing. You got to be dressed up with a clown. Bring the whole team out. We'll bring the whole team out, Carson.

Malik, Malaki. Malachi, all of them. You say that, and it is something that I actually am going to put under consideration here, if there is a way to allow Mario Cristobald to embarrass me because he's never respected the court jester critic that I am. While he was headed toward this game of insanity last night, I'm in a local park, and I'm riding around on my bicycle. and what I don't know, I saw a mean laugh earlier about this

because you guys were making fun of which parts of this because this was actually, I was my own stuntman here and I had no help, this all happened. No help? This all happened. I wish we had another shot of you doing this. Well, this is the story. Okay, so this is the story I'm about to tell you, though,

because the funnier part of what happened here that I wish had been on camera, that I had turned the camera off for here, Well, are we just going to end up playing this? I have a 30-second clip the end. I will tell the audio audience that the punchline is me falling off of a bicycle and retrieving it with blood on my face. I want to give you guys some predictions and some videos over the course of the evening. Whoa, I'm in traffic now and in a dangerous place.

And Valerie might have been right. And, whoa, that was a little closer than I would have liked to admit, actually. I just look at God Get out of what Cains by 10 So there's a lot of blood So there's a lot of blood on my forehead And the canes didn't cover

Right well no the canes did cover They covered they didn't cover his spread They did cover three. They did cover, but they didn't cover by 10. But so, yeah, so what happened funny after that is I'm laying in a park on my stomach. Mario Cristobal is about to play one of the biggest games ever played in Miami, and bringing back Miami pride. And I'm in a local park with ketchup on my forehead because I've been riding a bike with

the phone in one hand and a napkin full of catch up in the other. And as I'm doing that part, and this is really behind the video, not hand-free on the bike? behind the video, not hands free, but I've got, but, but, but, but not really using the brakes, the hand brakes and just sort of, you know, riding my bike with my hands on the corners, I, as I'm crawling around on the ground, a man rushes over right after I've turned that off and says, are you okay? And, and, and so I'm looking up from grass and I'm like, yeah, yeah, I was just fooling. I'm an actor.

Yeah, I was just, but I'm on my hands and knees with ketchup on my hands and hands on my forehead. And I'm doing it for the Graham. You should have said, you ruined the shot! When are we going to talk about the Edward Cabrera trade?