The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: The Rattling Skype Call

Episode Date: November 3, 2025

"Thems be the breaks." Zaslow's bad advice cost his son $17,000, Mike is a gear head, and who's your favorite OC? Also, WORLD SERIES TALK FINALLY ARRIVES. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please drink responsibly. Smer enough. Number 21 vodka, distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume, the Smer enough company. New York, New York, please do not share with anyone under legal drinking age. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stucats podcast. What a day in Kingsport? Wow, thank you. Someone's calling us already on the Zoom.

Was that Skype? Was that a Skype call? I like that as a rejoin. I was... Quite unsettling. Anyways, the universe already ended. What year is it? The universe already ended.

We're just living in its echo. Hey, great day in the NFL yesterday. Those games, Bears, Bengals, Chiefs, Bills? Zaz, you saw those games? Of course, I see everything. Oh, my. Sports. I wish I was there in those stadiums.

And sometimes, certainly with Chiefs and Bills, there's only one way to get in that stadium. By taking the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with the GameTime map. That's right. You download the Game Time map. You create an account and you use code Dan for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Swipe, tap, ticket, go. Awesome.

That's a tremendous read by Mike Ryan. Look, I navigated adversity there. You did. With no penalties. Why did I say one time? Yeah, I don't know what I don't know what I'm like one place to go. I go one time. Are you Wycliffe?

I meant one place. I was trying to, you know, buoy Mike. One time. Yeah, boie. You're like, no, I'm Wyclef. I'm gone until November. Zaz. Yeah.

Your kid, it costs them a lot of money, don't you? Man. So yesterday, I got home from Jacksonville yesterday, late morning yesterday. I was at the world's largest outdoor cocktail party. They don't call it that anymore. They changed it. You know what? Make my own rules, Mike. That's nice. That's an unfortunate call that Florida got there. That was a catch. Right. Which was, which was clearer? The foot on the plate in the World Series or the no catch? That was a clear catch. It seemed like a catch, right? They got wrong. It was also a clear out at home place. It was.

No, we have video. We have video of the planting foot, of the planting foot of Will Smith behind the plate. You guys don't see. It's very obviously. It's so out. It's right into the play. Three dimensions. I also cannot believe we are in the third hour of this show.

And the only World Series Game 7 that we have discussed is whether or not this play was safe or out when there were some of the most amazing moments I've ever seen in a baseball game. Jeremy, we can circle back to it. You interrupted Zazzo and I don't like that. Thank you, Mike. Be respectful. About time, somebody said that. So, I got back from Jacksonville late yesterday morning, a couple hours out. I'm sitting on the couch in the Zazel Mansion family room.

I'm enjoying a little football. I like that the dolphins aren't playing, so it's a nice day. And my son sends me a text message. I haven't heard from all weekend. He's almost 17. He sends me a text message. All it says is, you're a terrorist. It's all it says.

He's calling me a terrorist. Extreme? And I'm thinking about it for a second. What terror have you rained? And then I realized what I did. I just wrote back, I go, oh, no. What'd you do? So my son was in a survivor pool, all right?

A lot of money here, all right? It was one of those survivor pools, a lot of people. There was about 170-some odd people in it, and it was $100 per person. You do the math, grand prize, $17,000. Holy hell. All right. Yeah, $17,000 And going into this week

The 170-person pool Was whittled down to 20-something And he's one of the 20-something And so earlier in the week He's trying to, and he's planning, he's planning All right, if I do this year, I do this next week, I do this next week And I'm like, don't plan You just got to survive week to week, all right?

Just take the best team possible Do it next week the next week, all right? So my son says, he goes, I want to take the Ravens over the Dolphins And I'm like, no, don't, it's, it's the road team they give up terrible defense

what do you know well that's really what it boils down to us I don't know anything about sports and so I'm steering him off the Ravens on Thursday night you know it's weird weird things happen Thursday night football you know and he's like all right well who would you go with

and you say it Chris who did I tell him to go with had to be the Packers had to be the Packers so I steered him in the direction of the Packers and and that's you know I put two and two together, and that's why he texts me, you're a terrorist. That field goal must have been like a stab in the heart. $17,000.

Oh, my God. I felt bad. You know what? What's more egregious to tell him to pick the team that ended up losing or to talk him off of picking the team that ended up winning? Right, I did both. Have you been helping him every week? No.

No, it's the first time you came in. No, it's like the first time. No, because every week, I'm like, hey, did you survive your pool? You survive. And every week he comes to be really proud. He's like, I know what I'm doing this coming week. I'm going to do this, I'm going to do this. I'm like, all right, sounds great, man.

Good luck. And then this week, finally, because it involved the dolphins, and I feel like I know something. Because I don't know. I don't even follow sports. And so I was like, no, don't do it. It was like the first week I gave him advice. Osama bin Zaslin over here. I had spoken to him all the weekend.

Just you're a terrorist. Yes, you are. You are the highest order. I felt bad. You should be on a watch list. It's a lot of money. I want to see what he planned. And if what he planned goes accordingly and he wins out, you owe him $17,000.

You do. You do. That'll be interesting, right? Because he picked the Ravens this week. That's what he wanted to pick. You talked him off. He wanted to pick the Ravens this week. He wanted to save the hackers.

Text your son and tell him, hey, who would have been the next couple of weeks? Show me the plan. I will. Get the plan. And let's put it up there and let's see what happens. Because if he does and he wins out, you owe him $70 grand. In cash. It's a lot of money for a 17-year-old.

It is. I would not feel comfortable with my kid having $17,000 just out of the blue. Well, we're not, he's not going to walk around within his pocket. I mean, what do you think it's going to happen? What do you think he's going to put it in a bank in his bank account? You think he's going to put in a bank account? Have you not been 17 before? What's your name is you have been doing so much ignorant shit with that?

Want to make it clear, $17,000, a lot for any of us. Would be really nice to have $17,000. But we're adults. 17 years old, you give me $17,000. That's like a million dollars. Exactly. Just have a bar mitzvah. Yeah, he must have thought it's like an incredible amount of money.

that his father just... I'd be like James Franklin planning like a wild trip. You see him, Tony. See the vacation? The post-firing vacation. Me and Tony... Not as good as what I like, though. We love talking about the rich coaches with their like, we just got fired. Everyone... Everyone thinks their life stinks.

I have no time. I have no job now. I have all this money. And we saw he was at, it was at Greece. He was on some lake in Greece. Brian Kelly has $54 million. Think about the trip you're planning. And it was like, you know what his Fridays used to be like? Oh, hold on, let me watch some more film.

Hello, are you up? Oh, no, we have to do this. Nothing is you. Now, Friday? Ah. Exactly right. Exactly right. Here is something we like to call reckless speculation.

You're good. It works. I mean, go. Brian Kelly's having the time of his life. If I'm Brian Kelly, I've got all types of performers over like I'm Paul Pierce. Just living my life. on a live stream, asking them what website you came from. Paul Pierce has been celebrating that one championship since.

It's, man, if you're Paul Pierce, you've got to say to yourself that I didn't want to talk about Paul Pierce right now. I got distracted because I had to hit the button. If you're Brian Kelly, though. Paul Pierce right now, Paul Pierce is like, what? If you're Paul Pierce, you're like, why isn't it being talking about me? But if you're Brian Kelly. You guys that suck. You got rattled just like Mike earlier.

I did get rattled because I... One time. Now do it with a Skype call. And your world being over. I love that ringtone, man. I mean, like, being a fired coach with a buyout. The dream. But that's how you know they're sickos.

I'm like, why would you ever go back? You give me $54 million right now. James Franklin in his first interview the next week after his fire says, I can't wait to get right back. I will walk. I swear to God. You give me $54 million right now. I will quit on the spot.

Just walk out. I'll walk to the airport. You see what I mean? You get $54 million. You can't take an Uber though. You got to walk to the airport. Like midnight run? Yep.

Barefoot. I'll do it. You know the way though. I mean, you got there pretty fast. Yeah. You'd be so tired. It's traffic. I'm fast in the traffic.

I'll be tired. You know what else I'll be? $54 million richer. Come on, man. Why do I feel bad for these people? For any of them? Yeah, I know Dan sits here trying to humanize people. people. Today we're doing something different. The substitute teachers out of control.

We're dehumanizing these people. We're going to dehumanize these people. They're richest, man. What are we doing? What are we doing? You're complaining. Oh, you're sad. Oh, it's not fair. I went to the national championship game last year. Well, yeah, I guess where you went now. I'd rather be in Greece than the national championship game. How about that? Mika. Mike, I know you've been to Mekinos, Mike. He went to the game before the game. Whatever. It's your Orange Bowl. Give a shit where he went. Do shit where he's at now. An interview the next week? Yeah. He out of your mind.

Yeah. Now I see why he didn't want to come to our show the next week. Of course. Because he's still trying to be serious. Oh, I don't have a job to do. I don't have it yet, but I'll do it. What happened in the World Series? There we go.

Circle him back. The Dodgers threw $300 million out there in the final endings of Game 7 of the World Series, and everyone's supposed to say, hey, this sport's okay. Hold on. Yoshinobu Yamamoto, doing what he did, going from a game six, start the night before where he gives up one run in six innings and they win the game to come back out the next night and dominate a Blue Jays lineup that had been great. I'll pull up the stats in just a second. The difference between when they were facing every other pitcher on the Dodgers

and facing Yoshinobu Yamamoto is extraordinary. I believe he gave up two runs in 17 and thirds innings, and otherwise they scored 31 runs in the series or something like that. I'll gather the numbers now. I have a theory, by the way. The whole pitchers can't pitch back-to-back days thing. It's whole bullshit. Well, they'll get hurt in the long way. These guys have successfully negotiated.

They're talking about load management in our sport. These guy, a whole position. All you do is load manage. Oh, I pitched two days ago. I can possibly... I'll see you in five days. I'll see you in a week. It's like, honey, can you open this jar?

No, I have to pitch in three days. Well, no. I can't use this. all for anything. They could pitch two days later. The starters can't start two days. Like, you can't expect to go six innings two days later. You can pitch two days later. You're going to get hurt, play the sport, play the sport, man. You're going to get hurt if you do that. Oh, so now we care when they get hurt, huh? Quil Leonard is very intrigued now. Quiland, oh, now, now it matters. He might get hurt. He might get hurt.

17 and two-thirds innings for the Blue Jays offense against Yoshinobu Yamamoto. Two runs. Blue Jay's offense versus every other Dodgers pitcher, 56 in a third innings, 32 runs. That's the difference. That's why he's the MVP, because not only did he have that type of dominance, he gets three road wins. Three road wins. He gets the game two win. He gets the game six win. He gets the game seven win. That is one of the best World Series performances we've ever seen. And from a pitcher, maybe Madison Bumgarner is like the only other example that we can look at this century. You know, you have Randy Johnson. There's other great ones.

But, like, Josh Beckett. Man. You're preaching to someone who saw Randy Johnson pitch 800 times in a five-game season. I're going to say, hit a bird. And that, too. You know the most incredible thing? I bring this up every time when we talk about this bird. It didn't, like, get hit and then fall down.

It disintegrated. Yeah, yeah. Like a cartoon. Cease to exist. Just others. Like Davy Doug getting shot. I've never seen anything like it since. It's incredible.

I'll tell you, though. But that World Series Saturday Night, ma'am? So good. If I'm a Blue Jays fan, I really question why I care about sports. I'm being serious about that. Because if I'm a Blue Jays fan, I'm obviously like I'm catatonic. It's the worst moment of my life. And I don't even know how I'm going to recover.

It's as brutal as it gets if you're a sports fan. And I really do. It makes me, everyone's like, oh, game seven, it's the greatest thing in sports. It makes me question why we care about sports when that ends up being the end result. because all of those people there in that stadium and all over the country, for that matter, it was like the worst moment of their life when that game ended.

I don't know how you come back. I really felt bad. I don't know how you come back from that as a fan. And not a guy watching Maple Leafs. Well, that's a low blow. You have the play at the plate inches away from winning the World Series. It's the worst shit.

Glad Jr. just misses having a walk off. They were two outs away from the World Series and now it's just like, all right, it never even happened. Why are you poo-pooing? Like, he just missed it. This World Series, is going to have a pretty big impact beyond just what we saw there. And I know that they had superstars in this game that will help grow the game.

But Tim Kirch, and I saw his postgame comments about how the Blue Jays might have changed the sport forever. I mean, go figure. Guys at the bottom of the lineup, just trying to put the bat on the ball. They're a little bit of a throwback team, and they have some of these new school elements where you have guys just taking porn hacks at top there. But the roster construction around Toronto does get. get people a chance, even though you ran into, like, a $2 billion roster. But also the old school method, you know, bunting the guy over on the 11,

giving away the out, like, that's, I think it's a fly. I'm sorry, what kind of hacks did you say? Porn hacks. That's what I thought I heard. I felt so good for those people. You know, what was it early in the game when you get the three run home? Like, oh, my God, they're so happy. They're so excited.

This is so cool. And for it to end the way it did it, that's the former Marlin. man Miguel Rojas Have you heard of Gold Belly? It's this amazing site I order from

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Stugats. I love you, Woody. That's on you. I don't know you that well. I don't know you that well. Yeah, they said that you both suck ass and were bitten in the ass. So those are both things that you were accused of during this. You're a rough day.

I have a situation. This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats. not even the most brutal championship lost over the weekend oh what happened oh my gosh you guys weren't watching the cup series finale from phoenix but denny hamlin storylines galore racer for joe gibbs racing owner of 2311 michael jordan's team that is presently suing nascar his dad terminally ill never has won a championship

to any Hamlin and it was all right there for him he's basically the Buffalo Bills of this sport he's won damn near 60 times one at Daytona multiple times but he has never won a Cup Series championship I'm never going to understand he races for one team but owns another it's crazy

any who guys dominating the race at Phoenix dominant leading lap after lap after lap there are only other three other drivers that are eligible to win this championship in this race. You have Kyle Larson, you have William Byron, and you have Chase Briscoe.

Briscoe has a bad car, battles, but doesn't figure into the finish. You have William Byron, and you have Kyle Larson, teammates at Hendrick Motorsports. Denny Hamlin dominating. He's four laps away. He is leading the pack by multiple seconds.

What happened? William Byron blows a tire, and it brings about a caution. Denny Hamlin has to change all four tires. so it goes in the pit Kyle Larson takes the gamble was basically on two bad left tires the entire final stage of that race

just kept changing the two tires on the right side you go to a restart Kyle Larson holds position Denny Hamlin devastated just in his car he found a way to look crestfallen with a helmet on that's hard to do

and you had one of the it was really gripping television did like you do something wrong could he have done something different nothing wrong man it's just how random that sport could be Kyle Larson, he wasn't leading any laps. He was a lap down at one point.

There's an incredible comeback for Kyle Larson, but Denny Hamlin, you feel bad? I'm a big Kyle Larson fan. I'm rocking the five out right now. I was rooting for Denny. I was rooting for Denny Hamlin because of all the reasons that I laid out, I wanted to see the Frans family hand him that Cup Series championship. I wanted him to finally get that monkey off his back and win a Cup Series championship. Instead, what you had was absolute joy on one side of the, of the,

of the split screen, and damn near the saddest an individual has ever looked in their entire life competing in motorsports. You know what they say? I do. Them's be the brakes. Get it? Like at a car! Breaks be RK.E.

It's a NASCAR joke. What do you guys know about funny? You've been out to that race in Phoenix before, right? I have. Yeah. It's fun, man. Going in person is fun. I mean, there's a time in that track.

There's one section where dog legs where you can get like seven wide. And you had one of those resarts there, and it allows for something random. But if William Byron never gets that flat tire, Denny Hamlin finally gets to win that championship. And you have one of the cooler celebrations and cooler moments in sports this year. Instead, your heartbreaks for the guy. This is, as you ask the question, this is why? This is why. That heartbreak sets the tone and gives it a texture.

and a patina that is only, you only get it in sports. You can't get it from fiction. It's the only way you can do it from live, uninterrupted drama. Think about it like this. Think about how San Antonio felt when Ray Allen hit that shot. That sadness is, I would say, equivalent to what the Blue Jays felt, what Denny Hamlet felt. I know they had another game. Spurs and that stuff.

What you were saying about Blue Jays fans, like Denny Hamlin, it was pulsating off of him. Like, why am I doing this shit? Well, but at least it's his job, all right? If you're a fan, then it's really, why do I care about this? Why am I letting this ruin my life right now? That's how I felt for the Blue Jays fans. You know, awful those people feel, man, when they're leaving the stadium on Saturday night? I think Mike knows how awful for them.

Mike's pretty familiar how awful it. Yeah, no, my life is over. Well, there's also, like, not a world. 32 years, man. There's not a world where any of them are watching Miguel Rojas, right? because Otani's up next. So you're all thinking like, oh, God, with two outs, it's going to be Otani. What are we going to do?

They're going to get Rojas here. And then Miguel Rojas joins Bill Maserowski as the second player ever with a game tying or go-ahead, Homer in the ninth inning or later of a winner-take-all game in the World Series. Like, it was so improbable that he would play the type of role he did. He didn't play for the first five games. And then he comes into game six and has that scoop at second on the double play that almost went underappreciated because of how great it was that the play was made in left field with the jump that was made. But for him to have that scoop and then hit the homer and then be the guy

at second base with the infield in to make the throw home that gets the runner at home play. After tripping too, because he had tripping fallen back and then gained his composure and threw it back. It was so cool to see a guy who, I mean, started his career with the Dodgers, has just basically been a role player's whole career, was elevated to a leadership position in Miami. We all know that that kind of ended in an ugly way if you listen to the show with how it went down with jazz. But for him to now end up back in L.A. and to

contribute in that way, after not being a piece of that team throughout most of the postseason, it was so improbable. And it kind of feels like baseball is the only sport where that specific thing happens. Is there anybody who woke up, forget, woke up

today, who last night, or Saturday night, excuse me, was like, oh my God, I've been saved. more than Kike Hernandez. Because that MFer almost blew the whole thing. You don't think he catches it? Absolutely not. Really?

Sometimes those guys pull that out. It's incredibly hard-catch. Will he maze over the shoulder? They usually, if they can get a glove on it, they catch it. He was turned around. I'm with you. So lost in the sauce, man. I love the center field is just like, I'm running over you right now.

You can see the look at his eyes like, oh shit, I don't know what I'm doing. And then collision course. Oh, my God. To the point that Mike was making, if they threw $300 million in the last couple innings. The guys that really stepped up for the Dodgers were the guys that weren't paid all this money, right? Miguel Rojas has not paid a ton of money, hit the home run. Will Smith, who's probably the MVP if it wasn't Yamamoto, with how good he played caught, basically eight games worth in seven games. And then on top of that, Bahes, who couldn't get the bat on the ball

to save his eff in life, makes one of the most incredible plays flying over from like a hundred yards away in center field to make a grab, basically mossing his own player to get that catch. That was huge. No doubt, but also $300 million. But also, Mike, $300 million, but it took extra innings in Game 7 for them to beat. And coming back in Game 60. To me, I'm always a believer. Number one, Super teams are good for sports because it gives you- The Dodgers are definitely really good for baseball.

They're good for baseball. They make you tune in. And by the way, you're not just tuned in because you're rooting for them to lose. You're tuning because pretty damn interesting, like seeing the dude that pitches 10 innings and knocks out three home runs. Yeah, but you got to keep in mind that Game 7. probably does not happen without that ground rule

double in game six. I hate that rule with the ground rule double. You're telling me that their rule. But that outfielder, he can't grab the ball out. No, you can't. I do. They teach you that in Little League. You can't play Little League over there.

Grab the ball. You can't try to, but if it's stuck. Try to. He can't get out. You kidding me? What should happen if he tries to grab it? If he tries to grab it and can't. Then you go out.

Then you put your arms up. You can even try. I clearly know that's not how it works. but try and get the ball out. Why can't you get the ball? Get the ball! You're taught. Throw those hands up as soon as you see that ball stuck

because you can end up in that specific situation. It's an advantage for the fielder in that spot then. Try and get the ball out. Isn't it more of an advantage for the runner? Because if you're out there like... No, the runs would have scored. But I'm just saying you're fumbling in the thing. One of the runs would have scored.

I don't know, man. I look, but my point is this. Number one. I can't get it. I can get it. It's just wild. The manager of the Blue Jay says, I've been here for years, never seen that happen.

And then it happens in one of the biggest moments. That shit happens. I really think, I don't think I'm using hyperbole when I said. Dembs be the brakes? It feels like it was the greatest world series ever. Because, you know, look, we were talking. I can't pick him a better one. Game one, nobody expects the Blue Jays to win.

And they went at, what, 5'1. It's like, oh, my God, Blue Jays, maybe they could do this, you know? And then you get to game three, and it's an 18 inning game, and the Dodgers are up 2-1, and they got the next two games at home. But, oh, no, the Blue Jays win both of those games. And then you get the finish to game six, so the Dodgers force at game seven and just an all-time classic game seven it feels like the greatest world series ever 2001 was pretty good yankees lost but like it was it was a fun series and again that last

game and seeing those assholes come on the mound and then seeing mariana Rivera and that's supposed to be that's it marianna vera you're into the same man well biongkin for that matter too was like the best closer in baseball that year and he blew what two games i think that series What are outside influences that kind of heightened the game? The Yankees became America's team. Oh, it's 9-11 now. Cubs Cleveland was pretty huge. You had both teams going a very long time without winning a championship.

There was a rain delay? Was the whole series? Was it the major drama that whole series? Brother, you're asking me questions that I can't answer. It's a seven-game series where you have the Cubs, right, as this team that hasn't won in 108 years. So there's drama inherently with every single pitch. But that was the difference in this series to me was everyone who we spoke to. Like, Tony, you're watching this with bated breath.

But he's locked in. Because every single pitch felt like it was such an important. Well, yeah, of course. But there was such an important moment with every single pitch. Outside of once it became 11 to 4 in the first game, it felt like the series could swing in any given moment. And to watch the Dodgers go into Toronto and do what they did with Yom. Yamamoto being this huge piece to think that Shohay Otani started multiple games,

has, I believe, three hits in the final game of the series in game seven, starting on the mound in that game, has a game where he reaches base nine times, the first player in any game to do it, has three home runs in the series, and he wasn't even the best Japanese player on the Dodgers. That's how great Yamamoto was. It was wild after the game to see A-Rod at the desk when they get Otani. there for an interview asking him for an autograph and it's seeming like it's a rod here and he's just like this is this is a moment here like can you sign i think it was like his card from his like

on set it was just some card but just it was really cool seeing him you know what if i could just add real quick that cheater sucks on that still sucks let me say that about that little a rod story you know what that was right look at me louis oh just a rod like dog you can do this at any time You're A-Rod. You can do this any time. I'm going to do it in the middle of the broadcast. Was that the end of the interview when they're saying bye? And it was just more like, I want to document this.

So they're going by? You mean like the part where they throw to a commercial or someone somewhere else, but then he could just wait and like, oh, show, hey, before you go, can you sign this? No, I'm going to do it while it's on camera. You don't want to miss it. You know why? Because he's trying to have A-Rod is like passing the torch or whatever. Get out of it.

It seemed genuine to me. None of this shit is. With A-Rod? I know. And I get it. A-Rod is the least genuine. But just that moment, it seemed like he was just like, this is really cool. What did Jeter have?

Just a sourpuss face on the side? Yeah, basically. Yeah. It's not that good. Yeah. Hey, watch yourself, man. That's the captain, man. That's the captain, man. We did three in a row. You did two. We did three. Pretty much. I mean, like you...

Not even that good. You want to stack it up. You want to stack it up. The Astrix in the 20-20 years, too. I was a shortstop, but that means I'm good at everything. Pretty much. Half of a championship. Also, he had the thing when he fell into the thing and he cut his face. Remember that? Derek Jeter.

I didn't even have to do that. I could have just caught the ball and not fell over. No, man. Project Wolverine. Dan Lebatard. My algorithm on Instagram is dance, all boobs. Stugats. It's a good algorithm.

This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. Are you happy? Enough baseball? Are you happy? There's never enough baseball. Not with that series. Not enough baseball. This baseball talk is over.

Oh, man. Tony, what happened on the train? For real, the end of the season? Listen, I'm going to, I know that a former cast member would do a segment called the pickle. And I'm going to revive that. Hi, move with you yourselves pickles. Oh, yeah? Really?

How much? 299. That's a hell of a deal. So, I'm going to bring back the pickle. Here it is. Let's go. All right. I've got a bit of a pickle, you know, I'm a public transportation man, man of the people.

Yeah. And sometimes the train giveth, and sometimes the train taketh away, gentlemen. I was in a bit of a rock and a hard place situation where I was on the train. Okay. Packed. Okay, on the way home. And I'm sitting there, and I'm like, I'm like, the guy in front of me smells terrible. Oh, he stank?

He stinks. He stinks. He stinks. Bad. Like, B.O. or fart? Like all of it. Just not good. Yeah.

Just not good, right? The problem is, lady. behind me, so I'm standing up because of the train is packed. Guy next to me, she thought it was you. Lady behind me, too much perfume. So I'm in a rock and a hard place and the pickle is, do I lean over to the guy that smells like shit? Or do I lean into the lady

that's got a little bit too much perfume and it's actually like tearing my eyes, but she's got like tear gas on. Give me the tear gas. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. I was stuck, so I was trying to like hold my breath but imagine it's a 17 minute train ride from government center down to Daytonland. There's nothing worse than have to smell the B.O.

There's nothing worse. Yeah, no, but it was packed. Mike said switch cards. Switch carts. Here's the thing. The moment I get out of that cart, they're going to close the doors. I'm going to zoom off. I can't have that.

Number one. Number two, the other problem, you're on a seat. Switch cars may not have a seat. Might have to stand for that 17 minutes. You got a seat. You can go in between the carts too. No, I don't like doing in between the cards thing. You can't risk the seat.

You feel like it's a final destination scenario? Yeah, again, that's subway over in New York. Different store. You can kind of get in and out. All the time. This is the Metroo in Miami. me baby i don't know if people can go through that you ever watch under siege too dark territory you can do it with these do you guys do you guys do you guys is this a thing like

riding in between the cars is the coolest thing like you didn't not just passing between cars just to hang out there like the reason why they have all those signs you were dangerous yeah but like the reason they have all those signs of new york city subway is because of us like our generation in high school we were just there hanging out cool you know what here's the best part mike having conversations with all the conversations have to be like this You're like, what? Because it's so goddamn loud. You're outside of a train in a tunnel.

You guys are so cool. Yeah, man. So you guys are taking the two perfumed old lady over the B-Oed guy. Absolutely. Yeah. Guys in here? It's fairly obvious, no. No one's taking B-O. Tony.

Under Siege, too, Dark Territory. Juju, put it on the pole. How about Under Siege one when Erica Eleni came out of that birthday cake? Dude, don't put that. Incredible. That is a where were you type of moment. We don't talk about that enough. No.

Juju, put it on the pole. I found myself. Would you rather lean into the guy with the B-O? or lean into the woman with too much perfume on? Way too much perfume on. It was tough, though. I decided to stay in my center. Wow.

Yeah, I didn't go one way or the other. I stayed in the center and just tried to... Every time the door would open, I'd go... I kind of imagine Seagull and Under Siege 2 is like, imagine my luck. Again. He's like, what's happening again? Like John McLean? Well, like, yeah.

Or Sandra Bullock in Speed 2 cruise control. It's just like how often... Trying to go on a cruise. I mean, I'm taking unconventional methods of transportation here. How does this keep happening? I think it's more about Liam Neeson and Taken. I mean, at some point, we got to realize, buddy, you're a bad father.

How about you protect your family? Why are they always getting taken? He did bring his daughter to the bear, taking three, right? The panda bear, knocks on the door, and she opens it. It's just a panda bear, and then he... Ah, because he's a hell of a dad. Ultimately, the wife got killed.

At least with John Conner makes sense. He's not his wife anymore. Ex-wife. With John Connor, it makes sense because we know time travel is real. So you might as well take as many lottery tickets as you can to try to kill the kid. Mike, I showed my kid's edge of tomorrow. Oh, how about that movie? Liv die repeat.

No, it's always edge of tomorrow. Show them edge of tomorrow. How about Live die repeat? And then we went back to back. But how about Liv die repeat? I will never acknowledge that name. Liv die repeat, such a better name. The edge of tomorrow?

Yes. The edge of tomorrow. What does that even mean edge of tomorrow? I don't know what edge of tomorrow means. Like around midnight? Exactly. It's like tomorrow's about to happen, but it never happened. But I like lift, I repeat.

Because you're edging. Because you're edging. Exactly. Well, call it edging tomorrow. Edging tomorrow. Okay. One time. Mends me the brakes.

You know, but we went back to back. You know what we did after edge of tomorrow? Speaking of going back. to back, those Dodgers, huh? No. Groundhog Day. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Groundhog Day. And it hurt me. Kids like Groundhog Day better. Really? Well, that's just easier to understand. Oh, like it. Tomorrow's easy to understand. Not if you're a kid.

No. They're old enough. It's the edge of tomorrow. What do you not get about that? It gets a reset. Every time you think it's tomorrow, nope. You wake up. It's today.

It's Groundhog's Day. Well, that too. But that when you go to sleep and then you wake up and it's the same thing, right? That's the difference. This is when he's dying. You know what I'm fascinated by? Franchises that make a boatload of money overseas that don't make any sense to have sequels here in the States.

Like the Dodgers. Now you see me. Now you see me. Now you don't. Why are we doing this? Because it's a big franchise overseas. Europeans love magic. Can I mention...

The Chinese love magic. Can I mention this Jesse Eisenberg. He's willing to do all these now you see me movies. He won't return for the Facebook movie? It's a little wild. It's a little wild. I guess he knows that no one in the States is watching it. It's like the A-List actors that went over to Asia to film a commercial

because they never thought that the Internet would be a thing. You know, you know, when his career started to go downhill, right? Was when he did Batman versus Superman, Dawn of Justice. That little end credits, you know, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. The Redcoats are coming. He went from, like, yeah, the hot Hollywood actor, quirky, but does dramas and all that, to you're just a joke. He kind of had the career comeback, though.

With what? With the award season. Kieran Culkin won Best Supporting Actor on that movie. On that movie about the young Jewish men going back to tour like all the sites of the Holocaust. Yeah. That's a good movie. That was a little career comeback for him. Speaking of young Jewish men, I did compile a list because nobody wants this on Netflix just came back, which is a movie about a rabbi.

It's a show, Jeremy. Oh, yeah, TV show about a rabbi. Nobody wants that's what I think. Yeah. No, nobody wants anything that I do. I thought you were like, I have this. list. Well, nobody wants this either. No, because you're going to, when you hear it, you're not going to think anything of it either. But the whole premise is that Adam Brody has this young woman in Kristen Bell fall in love with him and realize that she really loves Jewish guys. And so I compiled a list here because that's kind of the premise of the show. Top five Jewish actors that millennial non-Jewish women have developed crushes on that made them go, huh, maybe I have a thing for Jewish guys. Or you could look at this as the top five Jewish actors, the Jewish men hope to be compared to on a first date.

There you go. So, for millennials, and this is particularly for young millennials, Gordo, from Lizzie McGuire. Any of you? Any of you? No. All right, we'll move on. No, no.

Speaking of social network, Andrew Garfield. He's O-L-I. He's M-O-T? Simply because you're surprised that he's M-O-T. He's in the tribe. Paul Rudd. O-L-I. He's just too handsome.

He's just too handsome, and no one really associates him with being a Jewish guy. This is my Paul-Rood impression. Here's one for all eight. Ages. Jeff Goldblum. I would have to agree. He's had multiple generations of non-Jewish women go, Hmm. How did Jeff Goldblum and a fly?

Good performance. He's shredded in that. Brundlefly. Picking off his fingernails. Look it like Julianne. Number five. Dave Franco. Not James?

Specifically, Dave. We don't like to acknowledge that one. Number four. Max Greenfield, for those of you who don't know, that is, Schmidt and New Girl. New Girl, there you go. He really, I mean, come on, he's the ultimate example of playing it, yes. And Goldblum? Absolutely, because Goldblum, we're talking different generations here.

I am talking specifically millennial women because that guy really plays into all of the stereotypes of being Jewish, but also, you know, he welcomes everyone. Go back to that other picture you guys had up in the preview, please, because that guy that you showed right before Max Greenfield, that guy looks exactly. Exactly. Like Kevin O'Connor with a wig on. That's Gordo. It's Kevin O'Connor. Number three. Jason Siegel.

Strong. That's more of a you're funny and you make me laugh. What are we known for? Number two. Adam Brody. Playing the hot rabbi right now. Good comeback by him. The O.C.

Love the O.C. That was the... You know about the O.C. I don't know about that O. You know who my OC is? Who? Pick one. Mike McDaniel.

And number one, Andy Samburg. What? Andy Samburg. I've never... From the day you joined SNL. Never stop, never stop. Big sex symbol for you? I promise you, you don't have to ask me.

You have to ask Shixas who are into Jewish guys. Andy Sandberg? Question mark. No, Zach Brath, huh? You got to pick an OC. You got to be pretty good. No, I got to go, Mike Malarkey. Yeah, I got to give me something.

I wanted to say Kevin O'Connell. I forgot about that, too. Another head coach. You had the good O.C. line. You just needed a coach. Mike Martz. I know. Look at that guy.

Andy Reed. Donnie dribble, jump to throw the pass. He's like, oh. And all of a sudden, Zaz Cup baseline. And I was like, where is he? I thought it's stayed in the corner. Just petered out with Mike McDaniel. What's chat about Miller Light?

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