The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: A Chorus of Fake Zagackis

Episode Date: November 22, 2023

Le Batard, Stugotz and the crew do Against The Spread, we find out what Billy Gil is growing in his fridge, and we spin the wheel of topics for our chorus of fake Joe Zagackis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Giraffeine's Network. This is the Dunluba Tarshou with the Stugat's Podcast. How many Zagakis do we now have around here? Because Tony Zagaki is rivaling Mike's complicated legacy, Zagakis. Thank you, Don. For quality of content and... And 15, 10, 5? And Chris Cody is trying to get into the mix here so that we can create finally an angelic chorus of Zagakis.

If you have three, do you have one? It's pretty good, man. For yours to make Tony's laugh, I wanna hear a debate between all of them. At one point. Do we have a bruise, Becky? That's you, Roy. Weem's in kind of luck.

Maybe, I don't know. Okay. Maybe it's just easy to do. Bubble blue. Don't give away the trade secrets. Yes, Dan, why don't you try? No, no, no, no, no, I don't want to try. But I drove home yesterday and I'm spinning through

the satellite. Prosage Gaki's a good bit. It is a good bit. I want all of them talking amongst each other at some point. I wouldn't think that the complicated legacy, Joseph Gaki would like, Brose Gaki. Oh, what are you doing? I'm fine.

We're all one, Dan. We are all publicly. I like him. Unity. Unity. It's on the back of the helmet for a reason. I'm driving home and in on. I am good with everything.

I'm just, I am an ally. I'm good with them, getting jobs, provided that they are as experienced as other people. Like, we don't have to make special exceptions. Come on now. It's got a point. I'm trying. In them, agreeing? People say we live in an echo chamber that our show

has too much of an echo chamber. Them, like, heart. Just saying, sometimes they're insulting Eric via to me. Them having a hearty agreement. Make a lot of good points. Oh, that's such a good show. We don't have a pipeline right now to conserve an audience. We could get it by you. You know, you want a higher day in

learning? Higher day learning. What Lening, what's a problem? So I'm driving home, okay? And there are seven or eight satellite sports channels. And the one that it's on is a college channel that says spin the wheel. And they're spinning a wheel of serious topics. And oddly enough, they spun it. And Michigan Ohio State came up

and then they talked about that game. I'd like to spin the wheel, our wheel with complicated legacy, Joe Zagaki and his chorus of Zagakis. Is it possible that we can bring out our wheel so that the complicated legacy, Zagaki, can make a fully flourishing peacock appearance on the show debuted, not to our audience, but as a signature character on our show with his own Segment. Yes, provided that I can pick the topics. Well, what's the wheel? The wheel chooses the top. Yeah, but I put the sort of topics on the wheel and we spin it. Right, but presented to you by Gus Machado Ford.

If you buy a Ford buy it from Gus. Okay, spin the wheel. What do you want to tell us what the topic is? Well, I use these topics for your Thanksgiving dinner. Great conversation starters. No chip, why not two? It's my favorite holiday. Everyone knows of course this is when the Indians willingly gave over the country to the white man.

And we gave them measles. That's historically accurate. That's in the books that are allowed in this state. It's been the wheel. Only white meat for me. Wow. Incredible. Wait, what are the topics? What are the total topics before three topics on this wheel more of a triangle Just three wow, let's say each year. Oh, you're not gonna it does say he's your rosy zoo key What we'll begin with you then then what do you make of each year of Suzuki throwing nine Shut up endings striking out nine Against a high school girls team In Japan Striking out nine against a high school girls team in Japan. I

Wish I could partner with a betting site that would offer a million dollars to any of our listeners. Oh, no, that's topic number two Patriot has offered one million dollars to any high school boys team To face the Las Vegas Aces. That was topic two. Again, try these out at Thanksgiving dinner. They're great conversation starters. And finally topic three.

Wait a minute, but we gotta spin the wheel. So you're not gonna, you're not responding. And you gave me no take on Hitchy Road, dominating. A 50 year old man. Documents, I believe he's 50. He threw a complete game. He's 50, right? He's not a pitcher,, I believe he's 50. He threw a complete game. Each year, he's not a pitcher, he's got a giant arm, he's more than 50.

Is it any older than 50? Is he just turned 50? I think of each year old. 50 years old. Okay, big arm. My grand-pappy would be really angry at me when I say this, but Japan has it figured out. No!

No! Yeah, Roy, I need, I need Bro, I need to browse the gaggy to stay in character, please. I'm trying to talk to a chorus of Zagakis here. So, Oh, sorry. This isn't exactly Blake Snow. Come on, ladies.

Come on. It's be serious. Do you want to talk about a patriot ponying up one million dollars? No, all right final topic wait. I don't think you explained correctly Final topic okay final topic here and Dan. I believe this is a call as you can champion with your platform Jim Urse has Lodge to complaint. I'm listening. He feels he was racially profiled by the authorities.

Racially profiled? Yes, as a white billionaire. His words, actual topic. For having cash and opiates in the back of his car. Legically, Dan, allegedly. Ritualizing, could have been vitamins. And those drugs are fine. Prov provided a doctor gives him to you. How about, what about, what about, what about,

what about, what about, what about the 20, three drugs, oh, stop that. $1,000 in cash. Or however much like, Jim or say, having a 10, line around, come on, you want to talk about that? You're always keeping up for the athletes when they're talking to, by the way, Kelly Ubrei lied. He was profiled by authorities.

It appears like he lied. Possibly having thousands of dollars in cash and drugs in his car. Can't find the car. They just assume, I mean, I do just assume that a white billionaire does have that lying around. So you don't want to talk, Kelly, right? I don't know if people have the guts.

Why are you pointing at the camera? You're pointing at the camera. He doesn't point to me, ESPN. Do you have the guts? They've gone all woke. Kelly, who break? Clearly lying. Allegedly.

Are you familiar with the sword? There's video. Yes. There's a ring video doorbell. I have no idea how can we talk about how TMZ got the ring video doorbell. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. being associated with a story that is him not necessarily looking like he was hit while riding around on a bicycle. So Kelly Ubre is found a nice little lane.

Thank you, Joe, for the topic. Joe really got us started there. I was hoping to hear more from Joe on those three tops. Like every time he talked to you, you had nothing for him on these big, medium-jewsy topics. I thought the point of it was for- You fancy yourself a critical thinker. Yeah, you were afraid of certain hard-hitting topics. Put yourself out there.

Too truthful. My truth hurts. The thing that hurt me in this segment is I really did think that this was a showcase for Josie Gackie and Brose Gackie and all the Josie Gackies to give me their opinions on those things. I didn't think I was needed in this particular segment. I thought it was a segment featuring the complicated legacy, Joe

Zagaki. I was right. Typical of the media. Should we all go with the one? Spinning, spin zone, Dan Levitard, spin zone. Yes, I think. Michael and Del Wins ruling. We don't hear about it. We don't want to talk about it when he wins. You're really talking to that camera. You are really playing to that camera. He's talking to you, Don.

He's talking to you, Don. Don, love it, Todd. So Kelly Ubrei, who's found a nice little niche for himself, a nice little role player for Philadelphia, three and D guy. He's playing pretty well for them. And then came the report that he was injured in a hit and run, hurt his chest in a hit and run accident. And that was a report. The details were a little weird at the time, not, not a lot there. A couple of days later, the police come out with a statement saying the local authorities

come out with a statement saying, we have no evidence of this happening. There's no car that we've seen. We've scanned the traffic light cameras and we haven't seen this alleged incident. Then comes a TMZ sports post, a ring video doorbell of Kelly Ubrey entering his home with a BMX bike. Now, I've learned since that Kelly Ubrei is reputed to be a BMX rider, loves riding his bike. And there has since been reported details

in his contract that say if he gets hurt right in this bike, there's language in his contract that says he'd be subject to some sort of penalty, could potentially avoid the contract. So it certainly benefits Kelly Ubrei to keep up appearances that he was hit by a car because the evidence would suggest that he injured himself in a bike accident. However, what is interesting to me here is how ESPN has covered it. They've been very careful to not mention these other theories out there.

And initially, I was paying attention on what the bottom line was saying, that initially it went from he claimed to have been hit by a car to now they're definitively saying Ubre was hit by a vehicle. That's changed because while they didn't come out and say there was this whole other theory out there, they kind of dance around it and protected themselves. Now they, the Sixers and Kelly Ubrei are all kind of holding this line that it was a car. Now it very well may have been a car. It could have been a car. And the Ring Video Doorbell is circumstantial. But why the change, why does it benefit everybody if it wasn't, I know why benefits Kelly Ubrei. I don't understand why ESPN is showing away from the conversation.

Journalistically, they may just decide there is not enough there. But if I want to put on my aluminum hat and see how ESPN has covered the sixers who have given them, well, great deal of information and how the James Harden trade request was treated as opposed to the Damien Lillard one, I'm kind of confused as how this one is being covered because there seems to be enough there to explore some of these interesting areas. Not being covered.

Yeah, I don't understand why we're not having that conversation about Kelly Ubreh and this is something that is exclusively living in common sections at this point. Well, what can be discussed responsibly there without being reckless speculation? about Kelly Ubrei, and this is something that is exclusively living in common sections at this point. Well, what can be discussed responsibly there without being reckless speculation? Because you've been careful with what some of your language is here. Like, what can, who, who has motive to make sure that all of this looks one way?

Like, who's being protected? You're, you're making the allegation that something is not journalistically sound here, as he has been, has to tell its insiders Hey, you're not allowed to gamble that's not allowed anymore and as we've seen what the insiders do in news gathering stuff That'll make you uncomfortable journalistically because still ESPN remains in the journalism business But they don't have to they don't have to do everything ethically right well right now There are rumors abound and circumstantial evidence suggesting that an NBA player made up getting hit by a car, and I think that's an interesting talking

point, and it's being totally avoided altogether. The Dan La Potosha was to got to sponsor by BetterHelp. The holiday season can stir a wide range of emotions, and the specific emotions experience can vary from person to person. While many people associate the holidays with feelings of joy, won't end togetherness, it's essential to recognize that the holiday season can also evoke various other emotions, both positive and negative. Adding something new and positive to your life can kinda act some of those feelings.

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Still gots. There are animals beneath you. Jesus. Animals that can eat you, and I look up. the hot air balloon called fire. Oh, I can't believe that. What? Still gots. There are animals beneath you. Jesus. Animals that can eat you. And I look up. And the balloon itself has a hole that is growing because it is on fire.

And the guy seemed like it wasn't the scariest thing in the world. It's like looking at the flight attendant, making sure if they're not panic, you're good. And they were not panicked, but we absolutely did crash land near some dung, but the basket ended up sideways just sort of spilling us out into the African plane.

Yes, the basket supposed to land flat, it did not land flat, it landed, and then went to its side and spit us out. And my head ended up near some fresh animal dung of some sort. When does poop graduate to Dung? When you're in the African plane, this is the Dane lebatar show with the stugats. So gots. Yo, want to go ATS? Oh, do I ever?

Oh my god. Oh my god. We're all doing really well in this game except for Dan who we ruled no longer eligible for the grand prize. But a big weekend. So many games to choose from. Dan's not eligible? No, he's still in it.

No, he's out. Striking distance. No, he's not even within that. What about the money ball? Because you're looking at possible points remaining at this. I got an email from Jeff Kings and they're like, stop letting Dan do it. Wow.

So, oh man. Bad. Yeah. I'm coming around on the music. I've got to agree. It's great. I am coming around on the music. I've got to agree. It's great. I am coming around on the music. It's time for...

Oogh! It's the spread! Oogh! It's the spread! And it's all brought to you by Draft King Sports Book. You're the gaki singing is where we had... The lane for Bro Zagaki was singing his thoughts. Oogh!

It's the spread! Maybe it was. You just got the name. When he signed up on the app for a limited time offer for new customers, it's at Draft King Sportsbook. Dan, we're skipping your ass. What? Yeah, no, I don't want to hear his bad pitch.

Give him a shot. Dan, will you not come to him at the end? Well, you not only pick a winner, but promise to deliver your winner in the proper enthusiastic voice. Everyone better hedge this to this. Like this. Till death do you part? Okay, I will attempt. Wow. I will attempt. And the spirit of Thanksgiving, the spirit of camaraderie and the spirit of work families who talk things through and differences are set aside because there is love in the air during the spirit of Chris It was a simple yes or no Love that Dan. Yeah, he's Christ. So got kick us off in honor of Christ. I will Mike on this weekend

You know what's happening? The game is happening the game Michigan Ohio State and Orbor. I've never believed in Ohio State and Orbor I've never believed in Ohio State the entire year I think Michigan is the best team in the country. I'm including Alabama Michigan minus three to half. I am taking the Wolverines What about Georgia? What about them? Just they're not in the conversation.'s off in Athens. I don't know what it is. The Bulldogs. It hasn't looked very off.

They've won like 30 straight regular season games. It's pretty on right now, man. It's off like the first eight minutes of that ball again. They love falling behind seven. That's the spot you're seven. Yes, and then, and then as I mentioned, then the way you're hard to say. When I've bet the other side, it's second quarter.

It's 24-7 now and they've got the ball at the 19 yard line of the other team that's something called a conkey running into the end. I keep betting something's a note off on Georgia and it's like oh no it isn't. Oh there goes my money. Woohoo! Woo! There I had Tennessee what they're getting nine! Come on! Look out! Oh they're not going to score anymore at all! Okay I'm sorry. I'm tempted to take Georgia Tech here after that set up. I will pass. Okay. And speaking of something not being right,

something is not right at Arrowhead Stadium. I just don't like these Kansas City Chiefs right now. And I'm sure they'll figure out their offense, but not this week. That is too many points. And the Kansas City Chiefs historically, not good at covering big spreads. And Tony Pierce has those Las Vegas Raiders

clicking on all cylinders, so, or five or, are they clicking or firing or? They're firing, they're firing. They're firing, yeah. No, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're three and o, ATS, with Antonio Pierce. But that's the same thing. So I think he will remain perfect ATS.

I'm taking the Raiders. Ah, yeah. Hey, Bruce! Bruce! Bro Zagaki, you're next. Alright, the Boston Bruins, that's Roy. That's me. Yeah. That's not Bruce Zagaki. The Boston Bruins are playing the Florida Panthers tonight.

The Panthers aren't home they are. Oh, that's Kermit the Frog now. Brosey, it's got to be a limited impersonation. It's a limited impersonation. Kermit the Frog. You're... HELLO! The Boston Bruins of Plenty Florida Panthers tonight the Panthers are a home dog in the puckline by a goal and a half and the Panthers the puckline No, no, I was saying an underdog at home the Panthers are good. We know they're good

They respect the panthers, but he's taking puckline. He's laying some juice. Yes. Yes. Yeah down the middle Roy Well hold on is it is it this gonna be the basis of your pregame show today? Yes, don't give away the goods now. Oh, okay, well I actually have to say this yeah, you're calling the game you can't pick it. Yes, I'll extend I'll extend the barcalf Would not play Make you emotional despite that fact. I'm going with the panthers against this bread Alright, now give us a chance so we'll do it all together. Go ahead. Okay, two one Okay, bro, you gotta own it. I got on it. How am I gonna own it when you guys are nice? We stop you stay? I'll do it. You guys all stop here. It's called

Tony You're your fake The Miami Hurricanes and the Boston College They are giving eight and the Boston College. They are giving eight points. The Boston College Eagles. The Boston College. Did you not know that they were the Eagles? I, they're going. I love Eagles.

I got caught. The Boston College. Thank you. Miami is giving eight points. And I will be taking the Miami Hurricanes for a legacy game for Mario Cristobal. I'm going to say back to you, Don. I will be taking the Miami Hurricanes for a legacy game for Mario Cristobal. I'll be back. I'll be back. Don't say it.

Back to you, Don. Minus eight. You're going with the Homer's neck. Or with the Homer pick. I'll be taking the PC for a second. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Good enough, hold on. Legacy game for Mario Cristobal.

He needs this one worse than ever. And we're taking the Miami Hurricanes. Oh, okay. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Timing is a little off there. Chris Cody. Talk to you, Josh Errol. Dolphins minus 10, not a Homer.

Homer pick, another Homer pick. Walking up. I just realized it is a triple header on Friday. Yeah. You start your day off with the canes, midday portion, Miami Dolphins, and then you close out your wonderful black Friday with the Cestocyclone. Talk to me. Talk to me. Taking on the Dajada Devils.

Cesta cyclones can basically clinch a playoff spot on Friday. What do you mean basically? Cause I mean, they get blank. It's not. It's not what I was. Friday night game in college. Football isn't like Virginia, Virginia Tech or something. Isn't it always one of those football games?

I know it's not. Talking about the Cesta cyclone. I know know I don't want you to talk about the Cess the cycle I want you to talk about how Friday that you're going against Oregon Oregon State the Civil War I have thoughts on the Civil War yeah what side were you on do you I'm surprised that wasn't up on the wheel your thoughts on the Civil War I'm surprised that we didn't didn't get to that. Do you have to get to mine or are we done or are you? No Billy. I'm going to take the Giants plus three and a half against the Patriots. Woof. Woof. Nice. I saw something and Tommy DeVito. Yeah.

So it goes much harder forward. Bill Belichek is turned into a coach here not trusting after a biweek That against the giant time of the video against Tommy to be done But the giant's arc the giant's are are not favorite there are plus three and a half Yeah, plus three and a half right so he he likes the points. You like Bella check to he's very good at this right now I check the sandings he is top dog really he has top dog How in God's name the the Duke, are we in a situation where you don't trust Bill Belicechek against DeVito? That people out here, I understand that the Patriots are bad. They're bad, I mean.

Don't look very good to you, but what is Belicechek taking away from the Giants if he's taking away one thing? There's only,'s taking away safe. You don't trust, you don't trust. Okay, so that leaves you with DeVito. Yeah, and he's been great. And he's just, he had a glimmer. What's going on?

But they should be working with, you know what I mean? Like, sport. God, you get three touchdowns. No exceptions. You're the host of God bless foot. Listen, he's been really good. Hey, now are you picking the the Patriots Giants game? Is that what it is? Is that what you're doing because you're providing a lot of analysis on that if that's your pick again?

Says burn I'd be happy who is the quarterback of is it zappy for who's playing quarterback? It's not already sounds like you're scared now No, I'm not as the Patriots. I'm taking the Patriots. I'm taking the Patri paper. All right deliver it. Come on one two the page. Three. I can buy the half point. I can't buy. No. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, And speaking of football stugots, on the way in today, I heard Mike Floreo create a totally new category for in the mix in the hunt. And he just invented it right on the spot. Really? Yes. I knew you'd be excited about that. Very excited. Yeah. Mike Floreo has said that if Washington had one last week against the very great Tommy DeVito, they would be quote, dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff conversation. Wow.

Dangerously close to the fringes of the flattigord. But if they'd won, if they had to win, they did not win. So no, but they were dangerously. It's a new kind of worry. It is, but it's not a lie. It's day. It's it's if they had won last week, they'd be dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff.

Not dangerously close to the conversation. Right. The fringes of the conversation. If they'd won if they'd won last week, they did not because the commanders are confusing, even though Tony falls in love every weekend with a different Sam Howe. Every weekend. It's the same Sam Howe. The problem is he has different sides of him. He's like, two face where it's like, one week you look at Sam Howe and he's like,

dude, he's amazing. The other week, he has four Fomal 17 interceptions and 800 sacks. You know, yeah. He's been. He's been. He's been sacked like 60 times does take. He holds the ball too long. It's not often.

No, I, the problem with Sam how largely is he's not being decisive enough. He looks fine when he's just throwing into that Frankenstein Logan Thomas. And in that one place where you can hit a six seven. So he yards per pass. That's right. But he's often getting sacked because that's also covered because it's Logan Thomas. He leads the NFL and passing your age. That's what that's what Tony, Tony falls in love with.

But a body throws interceptions and also takes a ton of sacks and you can't have all of those things be the same thing or you're dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff conversation only if you beat and Tommy DeVito, which you didn't know who's now dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff conversation only if you beat and Tommy DeVito which you didn't you know who's now dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff conversation who Denver they are they are now dangerously closer they win this week well they won last week why is he here why is he a fucking bronco why was what happened like, once you pop, you can't stop. Is that right? Allegedly. That's true. No, this one's confirmed.

Dangerously close Broncos, I believe the Broncos are in the mix. I believe they've graduated, they're in the mix. Well, they're five and five, like everyone else. But they're in the hunch. That doesn't mean dangerously close to the fringes of the playoff conversation. That's Washington, if they beaten New York, that means to in the mix. That's firmly in the mix.

I think if Vegas won last week, they'd be dangerously close to the fringe conversation. Yeah. No, they'd be six and five and better than the Broncos. They'd be in the hunt, firmly in the hunt. That's fair point, but they lost Bill. Who do you like this week? Broncos are browns. Ooh.

Ooh. Well, the fringes, huh? It's it's it's it's it's the browns are not in the fringe. Oh, the browns are browns. Ooh. Well, the fringe is, huh? It's it's it's it's it. The browns are not in the fringe. Oh, the browns are not good. The browns aren't going anywhere. The browns are in the plops.

Not how this game works. You've been wearing the T-R. You've been wearing the T-R. D-T-R. Stop it. They're the five. Project a little bit. There's seven and three. Yeah, they're definitely made.

The guts doesn't understand the game. We. What? Don Lebatard. I heard the hotel industry is moving away from providing shampoo and soap. Oh, don't get me started on them. Yeah.

Do not get me started on hotels. Oh, guys, don't get started. What they take from me, I feel like I'm entitled to take something from them. That is the ability, yes. They're gonna throw away the shampoo, they're gonna throw away the soap. I'm not even talking about that.

I'm talking about the sheets and I'm talking about the towels. Still gots. Oh, we really care about the environment. So please, hang up your towels and get out of here You just don't want to wash these towels because it's gonna cost you money to wash these towels All right, this whole thing about you're saving the whales or you're saving the turtles or whatever because I put my towel on a hanger It is so full of it all right

You just don't want to give me fresh towels every day just call it what it is tell me you don't want to give me fresh towels I'm still gonna throw it on the floor all right I feel like water is a renewable resource. And you're not really saving the ocean by using water to clean my towel. Are you? Am I missing something? What am I missing? Am I missing something? The end of the story. This is the Dan Lebatar show with this two cats! I have a massive announcement for this show. It concerns every single one of you.

I'm not talking about Max. We should have had a massive announcement yesterday. We underplayed that. That's a big deal that all of a sudden an hour of ours is going to be on Max. Yeah, that's real cool. It made more of what's happened to me. You, that's that's real cool. You know, one of those discussions later sure. Cool. Yeah. I thought that was a big announcement. Yeah. You know what? I, uh, can I reveal something? Can I reveal something that happened on my headphones, a private conversation

that I was having with two cats on the air? You can. We were talking about it. Were you asking me like all these side-by-ths. What if I said no? You're good for it. This is on brand. I am totally good for this. Yeah. I know the exact conversation. You were talking about it.

We were talking about all these alternate broadcasts that are very invoked right now about, you know, the McAfee watch parties that Kevin Hart potentially amaning cast. And two-gots told me in my headphones while we were having a conversation It's like this is a great opportunity to promote ours And I was like yeah wait what are what it's like our or our broadcast I'm like what are you talking about?

He thought with these Miller light reads that I'd been doing that I was promoting the Monet football watch party was something that we'd be doing here in the studio on providing an alternate broadcast when I thought I was very clear we're having a party right we're having a party yep and here are the details on the party I thought it was a watch a law yeah we're going to be watching the game it's going to be awkward if that game gets flexed out I'm going to need wool levis to look like damn mar. Have you seen the other games on the schedule that week? There's some beauties on that. I wanna take off a dolphin. There's two Monday night football games that week,

so we should be safe. December 11th, 2023. No matter who's playing that night, we certainly hope it's a Miami Dolphins. Miller Light and Dollar Shave Club are giving you the opportunity to come party with us. Wow. All right, we had our contest, so many people signed up.

So there's a lot of interest. Free. We are giving you a free party to hang out with us, and it's all going down in Dolphin Mall. Dolphin Mall, there's this great space I checked it out over the weekend called Vivo Miami with an outdoor stage to brand new great sports bar. That's old school Miami man, that's in an old mall, that's getting it done.

Not old mall. Very new mall. Very new mall. Very new mall. Very new mall. You can get international malls. New York. New York.

New York. New York. New York. The mall in general is an old concept Forgive me. Yeah, just the concept of the mall is old my bad. Yeah, we'll offer up that conceit. Malser and All's old. Yes. Yeah, this mall very new. That's definitely new mall This mall is new and this wing of the mall is especially new brand spanking new We know we're not opening a Tony But it was a soft launch before we got there.

Right. Now we're opening it. Now it's a hot launch. They have. Come watch Jags Browns with us. No, Jags Browns. Right now it's presently excited. It could be a good game though.

To be Titans, dolphins. The browns think. Hopefully. That's a little harsh. They're pretty. You know what, we're gonna fight CT. We. It's free to the public. All ages, all ages folks, come on out here. I'm expecting this place to be packed. We are not doing

mass this year. That was something that we did with my brother. This is the party we're having around the holidays this year. Come watch Bill's chiefs. We hope it's the game. We hope it's the dull thing. We hope it's the bills and jeeps, actually. It's been fine too. It has been a very long time since we haven't had a free to the public all ages party. There's usually been ticketed events to this or we've had because of capacity issues, had to close it off. This is your first opportunity in a really long time to watch a game with us, hang out with us, celebrate the show, and we're doing it

deep in the heart of Dave County in Doral. All right, we're doing this in Dolphin Mall, so we hope to see you all there. It's happening December 11th, and it all comes brought to you by Miller Light and Dollar Shave Club. So excited to go out there and touch the people. Stu Gotz, Mike Ryan had awkward conversations trying to get Dave Wonsett to try and do a cameo

in endorsement of our football musical. Right. And all I heard of his part of the conversation, Dave Wonsett was asking a lot of questions from the golf course off off because he was used to our show making fun of him and he distrusts our motives. So I heard Mike Ryan sort of not apologizing for

but explaining that Juanima Stashes, the restaurant that we opened that had chicken fingers, the shape of mustache is and was meant to celebrate the fact that he had a vanilla offense with no nuts and we put it on the menu That he was explaining to him that we were not making fun of Dave once it was a tribute that we that we when we do watch parties We try to do them correctly and wanting McStash's would just a theme for a party. That's all we were doing there creatively I'm following along and a great theme. Yeah. I mean, perhaps our best event ever.

Yeah, I mean. All right, trying to see where Dan goes with this all of them. But we haven't done this in a while and we open a restaurant to do a watch party and this is what we're doing in the spirit of Wani McSnash's, we are doing a watch party with our audience. I believe was 17 years ago.

Yeah. That's a long time. We turned a quarter deck into Wani McSash. So you're resurrecting the spirit of it. This, this, this, 17 years later. We got the 17 years later. That's the spirit I'm trying to resurrect. Yep. Thank you, Dan, for the vine. Hey, we got goody bags. We'll be giving stuff away. There's nice stage, a Miller light stage. And you could meet Dave Wadstead. Yes. No, no, no, no, that I can believe it was a fight. But we will be giving away the grand prize,

which is to the lead dog of again, really, yes, massive prize. What is it? There also be a live after the game with Roy. Oh, yes. And David Joach in the hockey news. And it's a mystery prize. A mystery.

We will all find out together at the very same moment. I don't know what it is. You keep saying it's a billy's in the lead right now. It is in the lead. Well, I don't like mystery. But you're right there. Right there too. Well, all right.

Everybody but in has a shot. Billy, can you please tell me of, maybe it's stable onset. Can you be? Can you please tell me of the stupid thing growing or not growing in your fridge? Oh yeah, I mean, punch lines ruined, but. So I don't know if you guys see these things

on social media that you think I gotta try that. I fell for one of those and I currently, I'm working on something that I fully know is not going to work whatsoever. Let's work backwards on this. what could be growing in his fridge okay Why one of those grow it in my fridge One of those how to control potatoes you're putting in your fridge You got me that marijuana in the cold. They don't know how to grow marijuana

Okay, I grow it then you keep it fresh in the fridge I've heard that but it's not it's not how it's done. Trust me, top or where? I do. Maybe, maybe it's a top or where too. Listen, I'm a kid. Try it out. And last but not least, part of the process is this.

Just trust me, I think we can't trust you. If we've learned nothing else around this show, it's not to be trusted. It's the dryout with weed, I can be trusted, yeah. Dryout face. So you guys have never tried like hacks that you see on like Instagram, Twitter, I've tried a bunch of these. Why are you looking directly up?

No, I'm just asking the room I'm curious because I'm gonna be made fun of when I admit what it is that I'm currently cooking up. I've got something in my fridge right now that is a potion that I created. A potion. Yeah, a potion. You have a potion when you're afraid. I have a potion in my fridge. Like a fruit white. Yeah. So what I did was, as you did on social media, you saw something and I have a potion in my fridge. Like a fruit white. Yeah.

So what I did was, as you did on social media, you saw something and I was like, hey, you know what, I have the ingredients to do this thing. And it was supposed to be, Dan, I feel like you can connect with this, a holistic cough remedy potion, right? So what you do is you take an entire onion and you chop it up and you put it in a mason jar and then you cry. No, and then you take honey and then you squeeze a ton of honey in it

and it's supposed to make this potion between the onions and the healing properties of the onion with the honey to post a suit like sore throats and coughs and stuff like that to natural remedy. My mother passed down from Awayla, a zappel cider and honey, but if you get a scratch in your throat, it's some sort of organic Latin recipe for curation.

Yeah, exactly. I was, it was reported in my head that it's supposed to be garlic, so you may have used the wrong. No, that's for a different thing. No, that's for a different thing. I got it. Yeah, there's two.

You can have a garlic one, you can have a whole. But this is different than billi- Different potions. Sir, you're trying, but that's not a, you're okay. So, do you have a vial that you have it in? Like, no, it's like a mason jar. It's like a big mason jar. You know what, screw-t You have Mason jars, guys.

If you want to ever save your fruits, I'm very big on the mom hacks on Instagram right now. I'm mom hack the crap out of things. So strawberries, blueberries, they all go bad very quickly, but if you slice them up, you clean them, and then you put them in a Mason jar, they'll last like two weeks. Save some money, not some money.

What's in your fridge, Billy? Talk about where I'm going to work. Right now I'm currently trying to grow a gummy bear to be the size of a macy's Thanksgiving day parade float because that's what I've seen has happened. Yeah, you put a gummy bear in this little thing of water, then you put some salt and then it grows 800 times the size. Some salt, is there any measurements

or it's just kind of eyeballing? That's where I was skeptical. There weren't clear instructions. It was just like put a gummy bear in, then you pull some salt and then a five pound gummy bear comes out of there. Are you hoping to get home to like the bursting out of your fridge?

I'm worried that it's gonna grow and like blow up my fridge and then like my wife will be like, what is it? Could be more dangerous than what Greg Cody does. Well, it's fake also is what I've learned very quickly is that clearly these videos are doctored. My emotional side is not doctored. Thank you video team for immediately emerging with the video of a barefoot chair there.

Greg Cody, frying his turkey, this is gonna be again tomorrow. See, that is close to the boiling oil. Look at the low, how low he's lowering. He's right about the rail like scraping the asphalt. It's like the raptors interest. If you look into the kitchen, it starts going. If you look really close, you can see the

orange cone behind it. Like it's just the most useless cone. That's way too close. It should be on the other side blocking people from preventing them from getting there. The most useless cone ever. My favorite part about this video is the one gigantic piece of oil that comes out of there and just narrowly misses his foot.

And he's just, he thinks all of this is safe. Look at the battering that Kassuela has taken, by the way. Holy shit, that thing has been in for the flavor for a second to the feet. The fact that that's on the outside tells you, this isn't as safe as you seem to think it is. It's not safe at all. A lot of overfurning. We've only done it every year for 12 years

Those who are not safe the feet are not proportional the barefoot part of it. He's like all feet It's crazy. Where's the ankle? He's got those Go straight from the knee to the bottom of the bottom If you told me that was a Hollywood prosthetic, I believe in a horror movie It doesn't fit the rest of his body a Hollywood prosthetic, I believe. In a horror movie. It doesn't fit the rest of his body. No, a Hollywood prosthetic in a horror movie. He would even feel it if the oil hit that foot.

You know what? You're right. The oil would whimper and go someplace else. It could be. The oil would be like that is too rotten. The whole way is like this. The symbiot, venom suit. That foot, the bottom of that foot hasn't been cleaned in so many years and watching across this dirty garage. If I just showed you a picture of Greg Cody's feet you'd assume you're looking at a giant a

Gargoyle yeah, you'd like a gargoyle. This is bow bands foot clearly. No, I can't believe I'm saying this I'm the only one that would know it his feet are very soft. It's what they are. Oh my god After a Jet set so skeleton I've touched them twice. I know, but Reptillion. Wasn't it the Turk off? You touched the tree. It's the Turk.

It's the Turk. You've touched the tree at the circle. It's the Turk's month. Is that right? That's lovely. So come out to our event 17 years ago at the quarter depth for Fauna. The spirit of was stash.

out to our event 17 years ago at the quarter of the day. The spirit of West Ashes.