The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: Billy's Barber Bind

Episode Date: August 20, 2025

"There's no Five-O?" 🎶 Dan, we didn't get fired 🎶 Logos have fallen off Greg Cote's phone, Billy is suspicious of Dan's offer for a haircut despite his great set of hair, and Dan went swimming in the deep ocean while bleeding from his tumble down the stairs. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stucats podcast. All right, we talked about sports billionaire owners and we talked about bank accounts and my bank accounts looking kind of thin. Oh, come on, Roy. I mean, I got to start playing the lottery, man. Yes. Yeah, and that's why we're teaming up with Jackpocket now. Over 600 million, Roy.

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How much would you give me, Roy, if you won $600 million. I always wonder what I would give out. I wonder what Roy would give me. I really don't understand. If I won, I would totally give a friend a million bucks. Whatever, make them happy. George Clooney. The George Clooney treatment.

I'll give a million dollars. Yeah. But what is a friend? But to me, how much you get me? I wouldn't call me and you friends yet, Zaz. Like, what would I get? Oh, wow. Well, but if you needed something, you know, and we worked together, like, I'm going to help you out, you know.

Are we going to do friend or coworker here? Because Billy just heard you. I mean, Billy took offense. It's been three weeks of you guys every day together. Oh, no. Zaz and I, much closer than we were months ago. Oh, yeah. Just to flat out tell him to his face, you're not my friend.

It's rude. I mean, geez. Come out early. You say my mom's a monster. You're not my friend. Like, what's going on with you today? buddy. I wasn't offended by it though. It's all good. We're talking money here. Okay, so it's okay to differentiate. Zaz, you've gotten very popular. People love how you say Thai food. I don't know

what that means, but I've just been told you. I mean, it is orange chicken. It is. Tried rice. He doesn't know what Thai food means. Thai food. It's delicious. It is. I know. Actual Thai food. That is Chinese food, what he's doing. And it needs to stop. I don't know why he's doing that, though. Give me that beef and broccoli. It's not. A cultural catch-all. No. You're doing that incorrectly. I have in play here a couple of things that I want to get to.

Jeremy has a song to remind me of all of the things that I missed. Let's do option B. I don't know that you're going to like that one much better, though, because... I can't like it much less. Well, okay, but let me tell you what option B is because Greg Cody is coming here, and the haircut he has is spectacular. Lucio, Greg Cody has done a lot of grooming on Metal Arc's dime, and right now, he looks tremendous, totally cleaned up, and what was supposed to be a punishment, Greg Cody trips up

the show, ends up with, I believe, him going home to a wife who's going to think he looks better than he ever has, leaving here. I don't know about that. Let's not get carried away. She knew me in my 20s. Greg Cutie. Yes, thank you, Billy. You said that she will either not know notice at all or compliment it, but you are betting which way on that? That's tough call with her because she's a weirdo when it comes to that. She has been bugging me for the past month plus that I need a haircut. When are you going to get a haircut?

She is going to be thrilled and notice it immediately, I am maintaining. That is the Lucio magic. That's what I would bet. I would bet you that amount and then you tell me, what should the amount be on that bet? I think she will notice that Lucio has made you sexier. Oh, I'll bet you $20. bucks. I mean, that's something that you could just lie about, so you can make it a bigger bet and just say that it went your way. Yeah, she's in on the bet. I give her 10. There you go.

You know, I keep 10. Cut her in. But there have been times in the past, in all seriousness, when I will get a haircut after being bugged by her to get a haircut and she'll come home from work, hey, how was your day? And hours go by. And she hasn't noticed what I'm promising. How long have you been married? 40-something years. Okay, I'm going to win this bet. She's just going to notice. You looked very messy coming in here today. You're leaving here looking very clean. Can you walk into your home? That's a small window.

He got the Lionelmes right. They really fit that in there. Can you walk into your home like recording so we could hear the reaction? Recording the whole thing? You think he knows how to do that? Judging by the video we saw earlier, no. Yeah, I would. If I could get an instant.

Chris, I would like to pay you by the hour to go produce the thing of your dad walking in. I am sure she's going to notice very soon. I'll teach him how to set up. voice memo so we can record the audio. They took the camera off of his home screen for some reason. I know. They did. Why? The whole logo. Why? It's not there anymore. I don't know. Billy, option. The Spotify logo fell off my camera and I used that more than any, any other logo on the screen. Did you pick it up? No, it disappeared when I say fell off. I don't know what you guys are talking about. So the logo fell off his camera, man. Keep up. I got to

type in the word Spotify. You're surprised on a while, Billy Wednesday. Stop being a poop. Go super inside. You're surprised by then, are you, Chris? I'm going to say something I might regret. Make it poop Billy Wednesday. Go on.

We should have taken the Jeremy Tashay option. I mean... You say that, but I haven't gotten to my second option yet, which Billy's going to like worse than the Jeremy Tashay option. Seems unlikely. Greg, Jeremy's the one on the four left. I have... Hey, Greg, it's me, Jeremy.

Wow. Fake limited Jeremy. If you think you're family. Poor Jeremy. No, please, you too develop and sharpen the fake limited Jeremy. That was, that's my favorite, Jeremy, the bobbing into your broadcasting screen, just sort of lobbing the broadcasting song. Hey, guys, I'm totally natural here while being not natural. Too far, damn.

He's a talent. I agree. He makes good songs. And one of these songs is going to be on display in a second. But I've got to put this option before Billy. Billy, Lucio's given free haircuts. And I told people to just gather around Lucio and anybody who needs a haircut should get one. And I heard in my periphery, somebody say that you either needed or wanted a haircut. And I looked at you and it looked like there was a great deal of hair underneath the mop. You've got a good set of hair. Are you? Do you have barber loyalties in play here? because some people have unique relationships with their barbers and never miss.

I'm in a barber bind at the moment, and I could use a haircut. I'm in two barber binds at the moment. Oh, boy. My original barber, my barber that I go to to get a haircut, has disappeared, which is a bit of a bind. And I followed him from one barber shop to another barber shop, and now he appears to no longer be at this barbershop, and I have to determine whether or not

I want to follow him to a third barbershop do I want to text him directly because I would book him through an app that he told me, don't text me, use the app. So I have to use the app to get him, but he's no longer there. He's not at the barbershop anymore. And based on the last conversation I had with him,

he may be in Lakeland now. And that's a bit of a drive to go to see the same barber. So I don't know if I want to just pull the plug because if he's gone to a third barbershop and I reach out, then I have to go to the third barbershop. The price changed.

one barbershop to the next, so do I just start over fresh with a new barber? That's barber bind number one. Also, he thinks I'm a cop. But then he doesn't think I'm a cop. He asked me if I was a drug addict. It's a whole thing. So that's barber bind number one. Barber bind number two is this could all be resolved today, or I could put a Band-Aid

on the situation and just get a haircut, and then I could prolong the amount of time I need to figure out what to do with said Barbara bind number one. But Barbara bind number two that we have here goes back a couple weeks. when we found out that there was a possibility of a barber coming because everyone out there was talking like just sign up someone's going to kind of cut hair here

and the general consensus in this office was well surely there's a catch like this is some sort of prank Dan's going to do he likes people in costumes he's going to instruct the barber to shave everyone's head like this can't be a normal situation where there's just a barber here giving haircuts

wait until you see the back of my dad's head Yeah, something's going on. So that's Barbara Biden number two, is that everyone is kind of, if you're wondering why there's been no activity, it's because everyone kind of talked about this behind you, and they think that there's something up here. And that you may have instructed him to kind of shave people's heads, mess up their hairs, et cetera, et cetera. Greg, spin around. Let the audience see the back. Oh, my God.

That's a cock. That's a person, the perfect first one is this, you know, that's like, look, this is all on the up and up. But if you've noticed, no one's lining up, because everyone's kind of wondering. When is this going to... Well, no, no, no. Billy's got a major penalty. Only five minutes for being Billy. I feel like we were wrapping up there.

He was bringing it home. I can't have my head shaved. Okay? And that's what I'm worried is going to happen. I'm going to be perfectly honest. I'm not because I don't trust Lucio. I trust Lucia. I want to go up and give him a hug.

Well, I think he's, you know, Lucio, it's not one to stand up to Marching orders. Lucio goes back a long way with us. He does. He's great, by the way, Lucio. I love that guy. But you don't trust him. You guys think he's going to shave your head?

You think Lucio would make... It's not Lucio that we're concerned about you. Yeah. It could be that I was the one to make everybody think he's going to give you a normal... False sense of security, see here? And now that I've thrown it out there, even if that wasn't a plan, now that plan is thought of like, well, maybe this... Maybe this is a plan. See?

Lucio is a man of honor. You guys, like, you disrespect him by him not making him his own proper entity. Once again, we're not worried about Lucio. Not worried about Lucio here. No, no. Luce is going to do a great job. Yep. It is suspicious.

You had three and a half weeks to concoct. Don't be suspicious. You were texting someone when you were falling down the stairs. It might have been Lucio. I mean, Lucio may be honoring the agreement he made with you. Uh-huh. Which is to shave Billy's head. A man of honor.

I wasn't worried about this, but now I am. You only came in here and said, Billy, don't you want a haircut? Which is like, well, what's a... Billy, people are saying you look terrible out there. You really need to cut your hair, Billy. Okay. You are in a really... I'm going to be honest with you.

Billy, I'm going to be honest with you. Out there, Dan walked by me. He goes, does Billy want a haircut? Okay, I didn't say it like that. See what's going on here? I'm liar. Now, if we and Chris can cut our hair together, being Billy, then maybe.

Can I get a haircut with a hat on? What? Yes. Go ahead. Both of you should go and get your haircut from Lucio at the same time. Can I get back to the rest of the show, please? I told you, Bill, you'd like this option less than the other one. So am I getting a haircut?

Yes. Oh. Yes. And we still have to live. listen to Jeremy's song. Yes. So no one won. You're going to get a nice haircut.

You're going to try. And then afterward, you're going to trust me and Lucio to not embarrass you, and you're going to have more love in your heart. I want to say one thing about the haircut thing. Am I the only one who noticed that Dan referred to Billy as having a nice set of hair? Who says that phrase? A nice set of hair. I've never heard that phrase before.

I didn't realize I had said that. Yeah, it's on record. Okay. Did he misspeak? Apparently I am the only one who knows it. Sounds like a misspeak. Nice set of hair. I'm sorry I did that.

You really got it. Got to go lettuce there. A nice set of lettuce. Oh, it's got some great lettuce. Billy just greeted Lucia with a vigorous hug. Yeah. And it was nice to see them get together. Billy has a good head of hair, is what I thought I said.

Good set of hair. I thought it was a good head of hair. Replay that tape. I think Billy has the best set of hair. He does. that we have around here What a set Look, every football game is a grind

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It's just going to be him coming out and hitting the one or two notes of that kind of thing, and you know it, and then just giving us finger guns and leave it. Baby. You should listen to the Great Cody Show podcast because that's all we do for 55 minutes a week is just say catchphrases. We even make songs about them. And you know it is a song for crying out loud. That's great. Hopefully that's a suey nominee for Best Song.

And you know it, baby, and you know it. Stugats. And you know it, baby, and you know it. Yeah, it is it. And you know it, baby, and you know it. And you know it. baby and you know it This is the Dan Levitar show

With the Stugats The Jeremy song is This is We didn't start the fire Now we have done this before This song has been done before In a previous incarnation By Hawk who produced a bunch of pirates

It was as I recall We didn't start the fire Was just naming random pirates Do I have that wrong, Roy? Black Beard Dale Barron, John McKay, Bill Day, Walk the Plank, Eye Patch, Vince DiMaggio, Bill, Madlock, Jim, Frigosi, Connie Mac,

Willie, Starge, Lee, Mozilla, Lloyd McClendon, Six, or Les Conno. Yeah, we got it. Okay, very good. Confirmed. And now Jeremy is trying to get in there, and Jeremy is trying to recap. He's trying to get me caught up, because you do fall behind. I was disconnected on vacation

when I wasn't in my phone falling down a flight of stairs. And so I don't know what happened. I will tell you that I learned a number of ridiculous things in Hawaii. One of them, I can't believe how popular our show is there, like truly stunned, that our show in Hawaii, I was treated in Hawaii the way I'm treated in Miami in a way that just really caught me off guard. Anyone ask about me? They did, actually. They're big fans of the show. There are some questions I wanted to ask you guys.

We were syndicated out there when we were at ESPN, and it was a morning show for a lot of folks. out there. I encountered that too when I went out there. Well, but I was really taken it back. It was really, it was heartening to see how popular our show is an ocean away in a place that is just super lovely and reminds me of Miami in a lot of ways, except never saw any police officers

there the entire time. How's the traffic? And there was no traffic. Like, I'm Saturday and Sunday night. I couldn't believe there was no traffic. They're going to sleep. They're going to sleep. They're not, they're not awake late on that island. There's not a lot of light on that island late at night. There was no 5-0. America is sleeping and

Hawaii goes to bed kind of early and it was lovely. It was lovely the entire time. Did you bump into Oprah Winfrey? I did not. She's got a gated community there. Her and Zuckerberg are just, they've got half the island and they did right in doing that. Even as Zuckerberg

builds a bomb shelter there because he doesn't want us to come for him when he steals all the things. Quite an aside there by you. Yeah, so he's just gobbling up this precious precious land there because he can and he is offended the locals because that place is America and not America, like it's a little bit removed in a way that's lovely.

It's really nice, safe, fun, and wonderful. I had a lovely time there, but the thing that took me back was the number of times that I was arriving in sports fandom, and it caught me off guard. One of them, I wanted to ask you guys how generally you feel about the deep sea. We're South Floridians here, my wife's brother and father are fishermen and outdoorsmen, so they are very comfortable with the deep sea as a family. family, right? And so when I imagine snorkeling or what it is that we were going to do, I did not imagine that my visibility would be 150 feet, but I would not be anywhere near seeing the bottom of the ocean. I would be near a volcano, and now I'm going out deep sea. And I'm telling my wife, because she's very comfortable with this, I'm like, honey, I know

this group of people is comfortable with this, but I think most people are uncomfortable swimming in the deep sea even if it's a group of people we're in the Pacific ocean and this is a long ways out so I don't know how comfortable you guys are with any of this but I'm a little even with Ron McGill and everything else I want to go see this in the wonder of it but I'm a little unnerved because I don't love it and emotion sick because it's big waves and I'm bouncing around and I don't feel very well and I'm I'm in the ocean and as we're going in one of the people in our group of people, I don't know, it was 30 people.

One of your snorkeling friends? One of my snorkeling friends looks up at me and says, I don't know who this person is. I've never met him before. Dolphins over or under seven and a half. And I had to go under there. Was he asking maybe, do you see seven and a half? How many do you see here? We are deep sea snorkeling.

Did you say hello? How many are we going to see? It was a good question, though, dolphins over under seven and a half. It's a tough one. I mean, you got the Patriots and the Jets twice, but you don't trust your quarterback to stay healthy. Homer. It's low. Take the over.

Trust me. How many dolphins did you see? Didn't see any dolphins. Hunter. Disappointing. Deep Sea, how do you guys feel about this? Not a fan. Nope.

Not a fan. That's a nope for me, doll. For other people, as Tony would say. What's that knowing on my leg? Because Valerie didn't understand. I was saying, hon, I think most people. with me on this. I don't think most people... For sure. Like, I know in this group of people

these people are fine with this and I'm good with turtles and reefs and I'm good if I can see the ocean floor, but when my visibility is 150 feet and we're by a volcano and like, oh, wait a minute, and the catamaran is bobbing around in a way

that if you're not taking motion sickness stuff, you're not going to feel very good. No. The ocean's for going in wastey, pee in and getting right back out. I've never once been live in my life, and I said, you know what I wish I was doing right now? In the deep sea. So, okay, so it was funny to have this conversation with Valerie. So put it on the poll at Lebitard show, uh, deep sea snorkeling. Yes or no? The visual of it with you doing it is funny.

And in the Pacific, that's where the big ones are. Yeah. Did you fall backwards? Or that's scuba diving. I was the one out there and I felt pathetic because there were kids in the water, right? And I'm, I'm holding the boogie board because I don't, I don't like, oh, you look like a seal? Are you crazy? Hey, you ever watch Shark Week in your life? Land lover. You went on a boogie board in the deep sea off Hawaii. That, you deserve to die. Rookie move. Straight up.

Yeah, rookie. Did you wear yellow too? That's yum, yum, yum. I feel like it. You cut yourself? Well, I was cut from the flight of stairs. Oh, no. At the flight of stairs, I had to help my elbow and my knee were bleeding because, yes. And so, but the thing that, so I'm surrounded.

by people who really are comfortable in this environment. They're here for the adventure of it, and the wonder of it is majestic. If you're not afraid, the discovery is awesome. Like, you'd be awed by what's down there. Colorful, the most beautiful things you've ever seen. Keep going, because in my head, I'm visualizing Jeremy at the edge of his seat for 20 minutes, waiting to hear his own voice. And I'm loving the visual.

Don't actually get to it. Indeed, right. By the way, our sources, our research sources have confirmed that you referred to Billy as having a nice set of hair. You've got a good set of hair. Okay, you got me, Greg. I'm cornered. You idiot. Yeah, I feel so foolish.

He's refused bits today and corrected you. Yeah. It's okay to correct me. I just wish you were funny. He pointed to the wrong rose. That wasn't a rose. Can you play a little more for me of Hock's old pirate song using the We Didn't Start the fire music as we wait, as Jeremy

wait patiently. Oh, Jeremy's head just blew up. To see if he a song will play. Scurvy, buried treasure, Raymond James Stadium, test of Bertie, Keishon, Johnson, Ken Obergfell, Ed, Ad, Dave Parker, Leroy, Selman, Chum Bucket, Michael Stott, Kent and Colby, Richies is Greek

Rushel and John Gruden. We are scared of Pirates. It is the ultimate recap song. Yes, and so Jeremy is going to catch me up on three and a half weeks. Dolphin 7 and a half is a good question. But I have, I'm rarely right with Valerie. I'm usually actually wrong.

I don't even mean like she's doing anything. I'm just often wrong. And so I was confused by her just being like, no, I think most people would enjoy jumping into the deep sea here and seeing what's here and love the possibility of that. And I was saying to her, well, I just thought we'd be going like a lagoon or a bay or something where I could see. Like a sandbar? Giant turtles, well, look, all I'm saying is if it's 150 feet of visibility, if I've got good stuff on my eyes and I can see, but I can't see near the ocean floor, I don't want to be there. And I think some people who are outdoor people, like, I think there are many people listening to this thinking we are wasting our use of South Florida if we're not better there, like that we live in one of the great places for all of that stuff and we are failing because we are landlubbers.

who can't appreciate why it is so many people live in this wonderful paradise we have down here. Like, I don't think we're exploring South Florida correctly. I love being in a boat on the ocean. That's great. I don't love being. A couple of Miller lights. Yeah, I don't like being outside of a boat. I don't like being underneath where the boat is sitting.

That's a road game. No, thank you. Yeah, I mean, I live nine miles from the Atlantic Ocean. I can count on one hand the times in a year. I'll whip a shark on land. I treat the deep ocean the way an SEC team would treat its non-conference schedule. We're just playing

these games at home. I'll just stand there for like five minutes. Now what you got, Shark? Maybe. Maybe Old Dominion. There's monsters in the ocean that you can't see. We know more about outer space and aliens than we know about the deep ocean. I go to the beach once a year for

a Panthers celebration of a Stanley Cup win. That's it. We sound like idiots. I mean, Ron McGill would be infuriated by what it is we're saying here. I did, no, well, no, I took, I took motion sickness, medicine before I went, and it's medicine that took me out for two days after. Were you wearing the deal behind the ear?

I've done, I've done all that. I did do the deep sea snorkeling in Hawaii against my better judgment. I threw up, just, I got seasick within the sea, but all the other people on the excursion were very happy because all the beautiful fish that came to eat my puke. this uh this this this was uh i'm not let me let me throw a few things out at you first at lebiturne none of them being jeremy's song none of them being jeremy's songs but perhaps a few more of hawks pirates i think i wouldn't mind hearing just a few more of hawks pirates from this song 15 years ago when we did it the first time not well we are scared of pirates they are always scary

and they're never caring we are scared of pirates and we will not fire you them, but we will start crying. Crying. Parish! Congo. Cruise ship, cruise ship. Gruden. Bruton.

Parish. Congo. Cruise ship. Bruton. Parish. Congo. Crewship. Gruden.

Did you guys talk at all? In recapping while I was gone, did you guys talk at all about Gruden winning that leaked emails lawsuit because basically some judges got together and they were like, no, it's ridiculous. Goodell can't be the do.

defendant and the arbiter on this. Oh, that is. Now we missed that topic. If only there were a way that we can find out the topics that we may have missed on vacation, but there's no way that's going to discovery. Congrats to John Gruden on his settlement. You can't help but laugh.

We're going to put in front of judges, okay? Hey, what do you think of this? Goodell runs this hugely popular league, and Gruden does a bunch of bad stuff by email, and they probably, you know, character assassinated him with a bunch of leakage. And you know who's going to hear the arbitration?

The defendant, Roger Goodell. And it wasn't even unanimous. It wasn't all the judges saying, this is ridiculous. And congratulations, John Gruden. You're not a homophobe or a racist, even though we saw your leaked emails. You are a freedom fighter and a martyr. There you go. Democracy lives.

Taken apart by the NFL and it's greedy. Greedy means. You guys didn't talk about that at all. We missed that one. Jeremy is going to be hurt now because he wants to recap the last few weeks What did I miss that I really would have wanted to talk about? Do you guys...

Maybe we'd talk about it after the song. The song could help. Okay. But also, pissing off Jeremy is appealing. Will Jeremy mention his own racism in his song? All right. Let's play a song. Let's play stat of the day here.

Let's do a stout of the day. Start of the day. In this year, start of the day. Star of the day, start of the day, and this year's start of the day. Start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, and this year start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, and this year start of the day.

A few weeks ago, I said on here, gave out some betting advice that if there's anything I know in the world, it's you always bet against Trevor Rogers. I gave that advice probably a little bit more than a month ago. Here's a fun stat. Among 173 pitchers with 60 plus innings pitch this season, Trevor Rogers is 1.41 ERA is the best in Major League Baseball. Oh, boy. So my advice, pretty bad. and in my defense Trevor Rogers was bad with the Marlins

and something happened okay this this is a good entry point to just talk about what a laughing stock this shows coverage of the AL East has been over the course of the last 18 months led by me and Chris Cody I told you

when I saw the Orioles their minor league system and what they did last year I told you that the Orioles would be good for 10 years they are not because they have no pitching their best pitching is Trevor Rogers who Chris Cody said I agree with him. I said he's a five, five ERA, no matter when he pitches, best in baseball. Okay. I also said, because of how good the Orioles were and how good the Blue Jays are and how good

the Reds are, that the Yankees were closer to the bottom of the division than the top when the season started. I did this because of how good I thought the Orioles would be. They are not good. But Trevor Rogers for them has been amazing. That concludes our embarrassing A.L. East coverage. We have got nothing right. You were kind of, the Yankees have been bad. Yeah, but I thought Baltimore was going to run that division. You don't understand how loaded their farm system was.

Like they've had so many injuries and pitching is a difficult thing because it's, those arms get hurt too much. It's crazy. I just got a text from Jeremy, what? I got one that said Orioles talk. Okay, wait a minute. That guy, what, he took

time off from uttering slurs to text you guys. And it's true. He is a racist. And now he's cursing at us. Bad work environment. Toxic work environment. I feel like that's bullying. Why is he cursing in us? Is there more of that Hawk Pirates song that you got there?

Are we all out of pirates? Is he racist or xenophope? Yeah, that's true. Well, that's a slur. I don't know. But it was just like honed in on Irish people. Yeah, it really was. Fine-tuned. Don Lebertard. What do we got here? I got a magnum condom.

We won't get that out. That's shocking. Stugats. Here's a picture of Christopher when he was like three years old. Right next to the condo? Yeah. He's a subtle reminder. Never forget.

This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. Billy, that haircut is coming. That is looking good. Lucio is doing a bang-up job here of cleaning up our people. Look at this. I don't know about his. binder, his barber bind, but you guys would say if your barber's left for Lakeland, he's no longer your barber, barber, right? Like...

Safe rule. You don't chase a barber. He chases you. Wow. Yeah. Well, what if it's a good barber? No, I don't think, you don't have this kind of intimate relationship with your barber because you don't care about these things the way, Billy does. I did recently switch barbers because, like, he switched locations, and I just didn't like that location. Wait a minute. I think this might be a three or four America's thing. They're absolutely

culturally here people, a whole bunch of people who have relationships with their barbers. Just because you guys don't care about your hair. Right. You don't go, this is an intimate act. You're having someone groom you. It's not, it, not many men are doing a lot of other grooming professionally that they're handing out to others because of whatever our repressions are there. I just look at it as a haircut. You know, I don't really grooming. I mean, come on. It's a haircut. Okay. It's looking good and taking care of how it is that you look. Billy, how is it going back there? Was your mistrust, was your mistrust misplaced? No, I always trusted Lucio That was not in question here

What are you doing with your barber That's so intimate, by the way That's more than just a haircut I'm just, you don't normally lend out A man doesn't normally lend out His grooming to others Okay Lucio, how's this going so far

This is really good No, this is almost finish All my finish And five minutes more Okay, grasias, good decision there, Billy What's your favorite color, Lucio? Great. All right.

Cut them off. How do I penalize it more? There we go. Thank you, Billy. Appreciate all your good work in there. Keep it coming. Wait, one more question. Dolphins, over and a half.

This one's for Lucio. Lucio, do you think the dolphins are going to win more or less than seven and a half games this year? There's 17 games, as you know. Seven and a half? Yeah, so are they going to win eight games? are they going to win seven games or more than eight or less than seven? That's how that's asked. I think maybe more than eight.

Wow. What do you make of the big Darren Waller news today? I don't have idea. Okay. We're all kind of in that position right now. Not me. I'm in a different position. I know.

The only Darren Waller backer. I am rooting for Darren Waller. Thank you for all your good work there, Billy and Lucio. Not since Big Mac have we had such good work. coming out of another part of the bill it is a good sound you're right nice sound it's nice shh shh oh it's a great song Jeremy's so mad Jeremy's so mad Jeremy's song recaps what kind of things have any of you heard it yes I've heard

it it's just obscure things on this show there are some news story items in there but it's a lot of just mundane stuff from the show. Just kind of give you a feel for what you missed. Yeah, mainline what you missed out on. Cliff notes of the show over the last close to a month. And should we get to that, though, or at this point, we're five minutes from ending the show. And how long is that song?

Jeremy tends to be pretty long-winded. And if I could talk about Zach Wilson for a while, I'd like to do that. I think the song might inspire some topics. Oh, you talked about this, why? So I would like to give a little back-end time. Yeah, and also, we kind of want to incentivize the creativity that Jeremy Tashay is bringing, which is, of course, doing a parody of a parody song

because Hock did it first. But what if I wanted to talk about, like, the sadness that came over me because Mariano Rivera tore his Achilles during an old-timers game? Well, how do you find out about it when you're in Hawaii and you're, you know, disconnected? 2 a.m. check?

It's what I was looking for when I fell down that flight of stairs and bloodied myself in a way that would make me a victim. Mariano, no, no. Totally sober at 2 a.m. In the deep sea. I was totally sober, though. You say Mariano, no, no, no. and I was wondering if we do analyze

Zach Wilson, can we play because of the Zach Wilson experience of every once in a while he'll make a throw and you'll be like, hey, that's John Elway. And then there's just the rest of the time. So can we have, can we use on this show, Tom Hanks yelling at that volleyball Wilson to sort of chronicle the sound

that a dolphin fan will feel this season if to a does indeed go down and now you're stuck with the Zach Wilson experience of he's probably going to give you three interceptions, make a lot of bad throws, and make two throws a game that you're like, that's the best throw I've ever seen. Ooh, I don't even know if he's QB2, though. Quinn yours has lit the town ablaze.

I've never heard about 4-for-16 talked about so positively. It was crazy. Yeah, other than those two lost fumbles, though, really, I mean, really good. How did a dolphin's practice get so bad that it reached across a deep sea to me in the deep ocean where I was disconnected, and people were talking about that. bad Dolphins practice. Can someone explain to me what happened? You didn't follow the next day's news where they were like, they were better, a little

better today. Better practice. Played dolphin football. Yeah. Whatever that means. Do you know what dolphin football means? I don't anymore. I don't know anymore what that means because this season at least they're going in again

with no expectations. Like they did that thing. They did the same thing the Browns did with. Carvis Landry and Odell Beckham and Baker Mayfield for one year's where one year of expectations. You, the Bills and the Browns will be the laughing stocks for 15 years in the entire league. The bills will climb out of it. The Browns will go back to flackle. That's not going black to flackle.

That's a totally different thing. And the dolphins are here and I'm in the deep sea and a guy's saying over under seven and a half. And I'm looking at the Jets and I'm looking at the Patriots. And I'm like, no, don't trust their quarterback to stay healthy. and I'm going under and I don't feel comfortable about it but it's just football is going to happen to them and they're not going to be able to withstand

when football happens to them. Did he have a follow-up? Well, he went off without a boogie board and I was still motion sick on the deck of the boat and they're giving me a boogie board and it was very, it was pathetic. It was like, sir, would you like, they saw, they saw, I was a little green.

They saw, they saw it, you want some help here. But you laugh. I believe our audience right now, do you guys think I have this wrong, is saying they cannot believe that we live in South Florida and between the all of us. There's no one who would want to go see a reef in the Keys where you'd see the most amazing fish you've ever seen in your life and have very little likelihood of anything actually eating you. I would think that the bigger danger would be currents and wind, honestly. But you're talking about scuba diving, right? You're talking about scuba diving, not just snorkeling. Snorkeling is what he's talking about.

You've got to go way down there to see anything interesting. If you're just snorkeling five feet below the ocean top, you don't see much, right? That is not accurate. Okay. And I'm not talking about scuba diving. I'm talking about snorkeling. And I'm also talking about the overall ignorance of the show displayed just there by not knowing anything about the ocean or the outdoors because we're fundamentally incompetent. But poorly, poorly we have led to Jeremy and I feel too bad and rested and sun-kissed from

vacation to actually not play the kid's song. So catch me up, would you? Dion had cancer Mike wanted him in the dirt Songs you hear at CBS Sharing birthdays with celebs Obama's from Pittsburgh Danu Avinard Shock my assol is the name

of a Gutierrez group text We didn't get fired No we didn't say Nothing big for racist And we didn't get fired Yeah we had it handled We didn't get canceled David visits Marlins Park

To a tackle Bali Billy asking David would you get that fish or not Hawking wear that because he's black Magic Johnson's huge contract David went to the new beach with Larry Bond best Moor 5 copyright

Marcy in a mash fight Jeff go nine for the day Mike and Grish know what to say beating down by streaming so much wrestling Pablo Tori making stories what about upstate

He didn't be fired No he didn't say Nothing big or racist Did we did be fired? Yeah, we had it and we didn't be canceled. Dolphins backup quarterbacks, and there's one till dough attacks. Ethan get this dog percy, not the first time that makes three. Aerit fighters, Taylor Swift, bowling, scores your practices,

as locates us on IG and on a Luluizi. Uh-oh. Greg Cody's slutty life, tennis matches for his wife. Tony's crashed out alien Earth, scamming four bar mits for shirts. Cancer shaming Jerry Jones, Carrie a liaison. JFK, Float away at Saudis ball in L.A.

Didn't we didn't get fired. No, he didn't say anything vaguely racist. Then we didn't get fired. Well, maybe I did, but I totally didn't need you. I'm seriously an accident. Like, who knows what that word means anyway? Very good. Lovely. He's talented, man.

I like the Don Slot one better. Gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler. In New York, called 877-8 Hope and Y or text Hope and Y. 18 or older, 19 or older in Nebraska, 21-or-older older in Arizona. Jack Pocket is a lottery courier and not affiliated with any state lottery. Voidware prohibited. Scratchers are subject to availability. Opt-in for $5 in non-withdrawable lottery credits that expire in 168 hours.

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