The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: Dan's Carrot Cake Story

Episode Date: June 26, 2025

Top 10 Wealthiest Magicians. Top 10 Greatest NFL Players of All-Time. Collision course. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Proximo. Cuervo.com. Please drink responsibly. Cuervo. This episode is brought to you by Dzone. For the first time ever, the 32 best soccer clubs from across the world are coming together to decide who the undisputed champions of the world Show with the StuGuts Podcast. Sign up now at dazone.com slash fifa. That's D-A-Z-N dot com slash fifa. This is the Don LeBattor Show with the StuGuts Podcast. So I'm a really big fan of the subreddit hypothetical situations. It might be my second most favorite.

My favorite of course is Bar Rescue. Bar Rescue subreddit number one. But number two is hypothetical situations. And I came across one yesterday and I was like, oh, this is a good question. Would you rather have telekinesis, the power to move things with your mind, or $250 million?

And I think the answer is less clear than I think most people, oh, just give me $250 million. But you can move things with your mind, man. There's no telling how much money you can make, right? First of all, just as a novelty act, right? You go to America's Got Talent and all that stuff, and then you have a Vegas residency.

Just moving things with your mind. Everyone says, oh, it's strings and all that stuff. You get paid crazy. David, was it David Copperfield? That dude makes like 40 million a year. And he doesn't have actual magic, right? If you have telekinesis, you got actual magic. But then, now you think about it, you go to Casino, right?

And you say, oh, I'm gonna bet it all on black. And then you make the ball, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Land on black. But this is a lot of work I have to do to acquire a lot of money when you're giving me the option to just acquire a lot of money. I don't have to do all this work of being in a- But it's a cool power. You'd have a power that no one else has. to just acquire a lot of money. Yeah. I don't have to do all this work of being an... But it's a cool power. You'd have a power that no one else has.

You'd make a ton of money. And also, you can use the power for other things that money can't buy, right? Hey, I'm playing basketball. Tony, you hoop. Wouldn't it be nice to like magically... To never miss? Yeah, like basically use the power of your mind and say, no, it's not going off.

Can I just clear traffic? You'd be Steph Curry. You realize that'd shoot a hundred percent from the field that'd be nice I like what you can't go a hundred percent because then suspicious. Yeah, you got it. Just like the roulette thing though, too Yeah, I lose a little can I Bruce Almighty traffic like just like I mean, yes But you know might hurt some people using your power for evil. Yeah, that's not good. As Bruce Almighty himself learned. I feel like when Bruce did it though, everyone safely was so much down the road. Bruce was God, so he did it in a way

that he could change things. Benevolently. He wasn't God, he had God's help. He was not God. He had God's power. Morgan Freeman was God. Well, clearly, obviously. Well, he made him God for the day, basically.

So you know what, go ahead, since it's so easy. He was renting, okay? Okay, so that's good. He was not, there was not God ownership there. No ownership, no. Morgan Freeman, we can all agree, Morgan Freeman gives off more God than Jim Carrey does. And I don't know, based on what's happened

in the world over the last 10 years, I kind of feel like God's a little bit more Jim Carrey. A little just out of control, smokin'! Ha ha. My brother for years around here played Would You Rather with us. It's a game that we used to play all the time, but they were more negative things like that.

They weren't positive. You weren't having a choice. Chris Cody, a bit allergic to work, just found the flaw in the hypothetical when he said, well, I can go to a casino and try to win this at roulette $17 at a time, or you can just wire $250 million to my account, but I don't need to have the power

of ever using my mind, which is pretty much the job he now has. Zagacki. Look, Chris, there's things that money can't buy though, man. And that's that joy. It's like yesterday, we actually upped the ante. I was talking to Tony about this yesterday. I said, what about telepathy, right?

Mind control. And I was like, yo, you can walk into any bank and legally have them give you money, because like, hey, I need you to give me this loan for $100 million. And then like every time it comes due, like it's not due yet. And they're like, yeah, you're right.

It's not due yet. And you're cool. And so that's not hurting people? Well, no, the bank. Who am I hurting at the bank? You're very exactly right. Come on. It's been hurting us for years. But it's an inefficient way to do it given that instead

of just taking the 250 million, now you're asking for a loan and paying the interest on it. I'm not paying the interest. I'm on Vegas Act. I'm like conning casinos. Yeah. Like you can just have 250 million. But you know what you can't do if you have mind control? Like with 250 million dollars and no mind control, Tony's got a young baby. Baby cries and is feeling pain and stuff. Mind control, hey, you're not in pain. And the baby's like, you know what, you're not, right? I'm not.

You can't do that with money. A billion dollars, 200 billion dollars couldn't do that. Mind control, baby, is the best superpower there is. I got stuck the other day. You mentioned Magic and Copperfield. Can you guys look up for me the magician who is paid the most? Because Copperfield is famous for a salary that's insane

I don't know if he's making more than David Blaine these days but the real magic of magic is that the other night because as I often do I Wasn't in the mood for something that was two hours or an hour and 30 minutes long all of a sudden I'm on Netflix and yep, I've watched a full 50 minute magic show. Wow. Yes, is it Jake Wellman? I don't remember what the person's name is, but what he was doing didn't have any explanation

that I could tell, and I found myself fascinated, even though I would assume, obviously, that it's not actual magic powers that he has. Dan, I've got a list for you. Net worth richest magicians in the world. We got five and we got five OLIs. Ready to do this? Whoa, I don't know if I am ready to do this.

Let me get the fanfare for you, go ahead. Is this dead or alive or active? This is everyone, all time. This is all time according to carnivalofillusion.com. We've got two lists right now that we're gonna get together. And I think this one's great, but I think Chris Cody's got a better one top 25 NFL players of all time

Wow, do you want to go? Do you want to go dueling where you go with your 10 or your Oli and then Chris? Where's your list from Chris CBS Sports, but I'll do top 10 here. Let's do top 10. Okay, here we go number 10 David Blaine 12 million dollars Modest number 10 Dan Marino David Blaine of the NFL number nine the amazing Jonathan also known as the Freddy Krueger of comedy 15 million dollars That guy has more money than david blaine number nine barry sanders

number eight barry sentinels number eight uri geller 20 million dollars i was more impressed by barry sanders magic than uri gellers me too pennan geller number eight Reggie white Number seven the world's fastest illusionist Dutch magician Hans Klok $25,000,000 You know what David Blaine is a better agent Tony just said I he mouthed it, what are we doing? Once you've gone...

Ron's clock! You can't go give me a Dutch magician and tell me he's better than David Blaine. Guys, it's working, it's way up. Dude was in ice for like 15 days. Number seven, Lawrence Taylor. Number six, and admittedly this might be cheating a little bit, Neil Patrick Harris, 40 million

dollars. This list stinks. Carnival illusion. Number six, Peyton Manning. Chris Cody's list is good and he's feeling good. Like he is feeling so good about never using his mind. Watch this. Number five, they call him the mind freak,

Chris Angel, $50 million. Number five, Joe Montana. He signed a record breaking contract at the Monte Carlo Resort in Las Vegas back in 94. It's Lance Burton. $100 million. Lance Burtman was a magician. The Puma. Number four, Walter Payton. Number three, a pair of guys that we talked about a lot on this show about a year ago. So Siegfried and Roy, $120 million.

I thought he was gonna go Penn and Teller there. Were they magic or were they just, you know, tiger trinkets? Number three, Jim Brown. Number two, we've made several jokes about them during this list right here. It's Penn and Teller, $300 million for the bad boys of magic. $300 million for the bad boys of magic.

Number two, Jerry Rice. Who's gonna be the number one player in the history of the NFL? I wonder. Number one, at clocking in at over a billion dollars, David Copperfield. Take that 250 mil and shove it up your ass. No way. That's a lot of money.

A billion? For magic? Am I doing it a dollar at a time? Like a, like. Well how much do you normally do, Dan? Like the slots. Where's Houdini? Depends on whether I'm wearing my high heels or not. Broke boy Houdini.

No way. One of the greatest magicians ever, broke boy? Broke boy, man. The forerunners, that's what always happens, man. I want to get to. We got number one. Number one. We know who number one is.

Gale Sayers. Wow. It's Tom Brady. I thought Gale Sayers was like a journalist. What? And a woman. Gale King. Just thought Gale Sayers was like a journalist what and a woman Gail King Just thought Gail Sayers. Maybe I'm doing Gail King like I just yeah, you are doing go you are Just I did Gail Sayers like that you said if you would have said that name to me before I walked in today I was just been like that was that like CNN. Where's he works? I put it on the pole

Did you think that Gail Sayers was Oprah's best friend? Where she works I put it on the pole. Did you think that Gail Sayers was Oprah's best friend? And and also put that leviton show have you ever known anyone who thought Gail Sayers was a woman I Said a journalist it could have been a man. It is a very Unorthodox name for a man right Gail. Do we have any other gales in history break it bad Wasn't the Australian player for Seton Hall named Andrew, was it Gale? No, or is it Andrew Gase? Oh, I thought, okay, I'm sorry.

That's fine. I'm talking about first name Gale. First name Gale? Wasn't there a famous ship that got lost at sea that has a Gale in it? The Gale probably made it lost at sea. One of the lead characters from The Hunger Games, played by Liam Hemsworth?

Yeah, Liam Hemsworth. So no real people, gale. By the way, those Hemsworths, all of them smoldering, and I was not understanding why it is you would get a smoldering Hemsworth and have a Mad Max Fury Road sequel and decide to get one of these smoldering Hemsworths and put a giant prosthetic nose on him. I was just confused.

If you're gonna get one of these smoldering Hemsworths, just let him be beautiful. Do not put a giant prosthetic nose on a Hemsworth. Two things. Number one, it's called acting, Dan. They wanna stretch their abilities. Number two, there is an ugly Hemsworth. It's the one that was in Westworld. He's abilities. Number two, there is an ugly Hemsworth.

It's the one that was in Westworld. He's the one that's like, you're a Hemsworth, really? And he's fronty. Yeah, is that like, you're related, you sure? Oh no. Find me his first name and then make the poll, is blank Hemsworth the Cooper Manning of the Hemsworth? What, just Googled the ugly Hemsworth?

Is there an ugly Hemsworth? Westworld Hemsworth. Wait a minute, wait the ugly Hemsworth? Is there an ugly Hemsworth? Westworld Hemsworth. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yeah, Luke. Wait a minute. You Google ugly Hemsworth brother, and Luke is what comes up. It's not fair.

Is he actually, look, I'm not comfortable calling just about anybody ugly. This is the deal. He's got a big face, but all of his facial features are bunched into the same area. The eyes, the nose, the mouth are right here, and then the rest of this is just a put it on the pole at Levitard show is everyone ugly compared to the Hemsworth and here's the issue where

you're talking about tall brothers right both Hemsworth brothers are two of the three tall maybe six three six four this one maybe sub six mm-hmm not good five nine five guys come on come on man. Oh There's a Craig Hemsworth. There's a fourth Hemsworth. Who's that? There's a fourth Hemsworth We were just talking about siblings like look at these two. Are you telling me? These are unfair look at that He's not ugly. He's just ugly compared to the Hemsworth's and we all are I actually take myself. I go with the one on the right over the left. I mean, the middle is clearly the best.

Roy, I will speak for you as well. Compared to the Hemsworths, you are ugly because everyone who stands next to the Hemsworths is ugly. I don't understand what he's talking about, man. I'm not saying anyone's ugly. I'm just saying they're ugly compared to the Hemsworths. See, to me, there's one that's clearly the best looking, and I don't know their names,

the one on the right right now. It's Thor. We call him Thor. He's clearly the best looking one, the other two, I would put it on the same plane. It's really like a Pokemon evolution of each other, like you start at one, you evolve to that next step, and then you end up at Chris.

He's right though, it's the chart of evolution where you start with a baboon and then you end up with a human being. What a terrible thing to say about the short Hemsworth here. But it does look like a baboon. You said it, I'm right. Hey, I know what a baboon is. Oh, sir.

Anyway, moving on to other things. We've got pitch clock for those of you who did not get enough baseball in the four hours that we did last night. I've got another clip that I wanna play for you guys to celebrate that but if you haven't been a part of our watch parties are going to be doing more and more of these over the course of the next couple of years and hopefully we will watch more game than we did last night because watch

yesterday was a contrivance and then we didn't end up actually watching the games we just ended up talking for four hours but one of the interesting things that happened and at the end of this hour for those of you missed it we're going to relive game one of the finals of the nba and the watch party we did with marrow my dad and an assortment of others but one of the highlights from last night was the general awkwardness of what I'm about to describe which is many years ago the Marlins Jeffrey Luria the owner of the Marlins had hired Bobby Valentine and David Sampson

Did an assortment of things to try and undermine the fact that his owner had hired someone That he and Larry Binfest did not want as the manager. Bobby Valentine and David Sampson do not like each other, but they did have last postseason some time on a set where they were doing baseball analysis. And so Sampson said, we're cool now, we're fine, we buried the hatchet. But then Bobby Valentine came on later and there was some question about whether or not these 2 people Barry hatchets the same way because it seems like Samson buried the hatchet and it seems like Valentine is

still swinging it not as awkward as it would have been if Bobby Valentine had shown up here and seen David's face my wrong David. You are actually because we all we finished that entire bit of awkwardness last October when he and I did pre and post game for CBS Sports and with as analysts for the World Series. And the way that happened is we each got a call from the higher ups at that network saying how would you feel about working with Valentine and how would you feel about working with Samson and we both said hey no problem and so we were in studio together every day watching every World Series game

together and doing all the pre and post and we talked about what had happened and everything was fine again. I was happy to hear that you and David Sampson had buried the hatchet last postseason. Well, I can't, is that a fact? I don't know. Nick. Bury the hatch? Well, you know, I think right at the end, I think we worked together and right at the end,

I might've said something like, I forget what I might've said, but I might've said something like, I forget what I might have said, but I might have said something like, do you know that I wasn't the one that told Buster only about me being the manager of the Marlins? And I think he walked to his car and I walked to my car and I guess that's the way we buried the hatchet, I guess.

That's not a buried hatchet. Not even a little bit. Was he sitting on a recliner or an office chair? I want that to be a recliner. It seemed like a recliner to me. I think it's an office chair. He also had his camera covered by half of a pillow or a t-shirt or something for an overwhelming majority

of the time he was on the bus. That was not a buried hatchet. That is the smile of a man who enjoyed not burying that hatchet with David Sampson. That's the smile of a man, not unlike Amin earlier in the show when he was fearing AI that would like to bury that hatchet in Sampson's forehead.

Very white teeth. The way he looks right here is, you said, do you guys bury the hatchet? Oh, you mean this thing right here? Right in Sampson's face. Can you guys find for me, please, why it is that people would bury hatchets? I was very happy there as you see that

That screen go ahead of me. I don't know if you want to find out that animal Do you know I believe it has something to do with pilgrims and Native Americans, okay? I do want to know though America's ugly history I don't want to hide it from the people and if it's hidden in a phrase like buried the hatchet I would just want the information of that but on the screen you may have noticed in one of the boxes and all of this is available by YouTube if you want to watch any of it from last night but Jeff Miller was there of the Los Angeles Times and the reason Jeff Miller was there was only to

tell what is I believe the most embarrassing story of my professional career. What'd it get? It doesn't rank as my biggest professional regret. We'll get to that next week. But as an embarrassment, Jeff Miller told the story of being at Shea Stadium. I was in my early 20s and we were in the press box and he was like, you won't do it. I'm like, I will do it. He's like, you won't do that. I'm like, I will do it.

And I was pushing a piece of carrot cake that was stale and starched and terrible toward the edge of the press box window and there were people down below. And so he's like, you will not do that. That's too unprofessional. I'm like, stop daring me to do it and I eventually just flicked it over.

Now I, I know. I'm embarrassed. You should start a new Chris Cody of the day segment. I'm embarrassed by this. And I look, they brought Jeff Miller on to embarrass me and tell that story. And he did, he's telling it to Bobby Valentine, who I thought was the manager of the Mets at the time.

He wasn't, it was Dallas Green. But I'm pushing this carrot cake. That's not the funniest part of the story. That's the embarrassing part of the story. but it gets better because after I push it he's shocked I'm looking at him shocked. I'm like I shouldn't have done that that was a bad decision Then I hear from down below hey What the fuck? But then I hear from above me no

Because nobody from the press box would throw a carrot cake But then I hear from above me, No, because it wouldn't have come from the press box. Because there's just no way on earth that Mike Frances is doing that from the press box. But there would never just be a plate of pie in the stand. So it's like, you have to do some math here. It's like, but you're right. You would never think a journalist would do that. You just skip right over.

Like, you put a mental block. Well, it's not this. So you think you have this frosting in your hair, and you're thinking to yourself You know, I think the media commissary is where that would come from They're not selling carrot cake at concessions in the upper deck. Where can I get a nice plate of cake? Hey bleep off in the middle of Flushing, New York guy, he's got icing on his face You think he's saying to himself? Well that carrot cake couldn't have come from the upper deck

They're clearly that and maybe going up to the upper deck because he'd like that carrot cake couldn't have come from the upper deck, they're clearly, and maybe going up to the upper deck because he'd like some carrot cake because they're selling it up there. Is it someone's birthday? What are we doing here? What type of eighth grade peer pressure did you succumb to?

I was in my early 20s. Don't dare Dan, he will do it. Again, not proud of it. Did he double dog dare you? Not proud of it. I will also say, Shea Stadium carrot cake, early 90s, of it. I will also say, Shea Stadium carrot cake, early 90s? Deserved it.

Deserved to be thrown on someone? It was terrible, terrible. You think that I've gone a lot of my life not putting that carrot cake in my mouth? Yeah, that's the biggest upset here. Apparently Amin was right on burying the hatchet. The phrase is an allusion to the figurative or literal practice of putting away weapons

at the cessation of hostiles or hostilities among or by indigenous peoples of the Americas and the Eastern United States and Canada. But is it a physical burying of an actual hatchet? They would bury their weapons at peacetime and then, well we know what would happen when it wasn at peacetime and then Well, we know what would happen when it wasn't peacetime. Yeah, they'll take about America. We got to a peacetime. I'm trying to find Was right it's that so America happened. Yeah, that's right three America

Always just three America's let's get left out Dan in those two America jokes. I don't like that That's why I would say three. Well, there's more than three. Well, it's four, America's. We're gonna do that. Many more than four. Stephon Whitecastle. Nice. Hispanics, I don't know that anyone has noticed this because Hispanics, especially during this time when we're talking so much about immigrants, but Hispanics, generally speaking, very grateful to be in this country. Hispanics, generally speaking. You do not hear a lot of complaints from Hispanic minorities that are public or whimpering because that doesn't tend to be what is taught in our culture. But the end result of that is that our demo, which is the unicorn in media, go ahead and name all the Hispanic people on, I don't know, Fox or ESPN Sports. Go ahead.

George Sadano. Friend or coworker? Everybody on deportes. Sadano, yeah. Go ahead. What's the second one? I don't know. Yeah, go ahead. Eduardo Perez?

Keep going. Eduardo Perez, there you go. Keep going. Ah, Dan LeBata? Pedro Martinez, a Turner. Oh, yeah. It gets hard. Dan LeBata?

There aren't a lot of women, and it gets difficult to do. Oh, women.ma Mendoza She's a great baseball analyst the the demo does not get represented Proportionally in the media Tony Collins still active in the country. I think she's out. She's out But you don't hear a lot of complaints about it at least in part because there aren't a lot of Hispanic media members to make Sarah Sarah Spain? Not Spain in her name. Not a play on for me.

Jeremy made his way through. Jeremy? Yeah, I powered through all the different views in the plate of my people. Chris Whittingham? Whittingham as well, but it is hard to identify sometimes when they look like Jeremy and Chris Whittingham. Whatever do you mean?

If Chris Whittingham. Or me for that matter. Well, Chris Whittingham, that's the funny thing, Chris Whittingham. Whatever do you mean? If Chris Whittingham. Or me for that matter. That's the funny thing, Chris Whittingham looks the part, but the name is kind of like a shield, right? If his name was anything else, would Chris Whittingham be? Well, my parents did that purposely. My dad wanted to name me Luis Orgonzalo,

and then they changed their mind because they didn't think that that would be friendly. And so what ends up happening later in life, I have to go get his cartoon accent so people don't think I'm French. We like to mock Witty a lot. His Jim Gray take aging nicely. What was his Jim Gray take?

That he's gonna have a better career, that he would not take Jim Gray's career. Over his own? He said it like years ago, and now he's like, he's gonna be calling World Cup games in a few years probably. I'm telling you, he could call every single World Cup from here until the end of the world.

You wildly disrespect the career of Jim Gray. Are you kidding? OK, if Witty becomes like the top or second soccer guy in all, of all soccer? Name me all the soccer guys. You know, there's Phil, Phil Shane, I think. Name me the soccer guys that you have at this level of notoriety that everybody knows.

Jim Gray put together the decision in his spare time. Jim Gray knew Snoop Dogg when he was 12 years old. I'm not saying he has surpassed him. I'm saying that take, we mocked him. It's just like, it's. He'll have a, Whitty will have a great career. Quitty. It's Quitty, it's Quitty, to be honest.

Jim Gray also has a Hollywood Walk of Fame star. Woody will never have one of those. Also really quick, last minute confession. Chris confessed to me in my ear that he didn't know that Gale Sayers was black. What? No. Rough hour for me.

No. We relived the watch party with my father, Mero and others. Game one of the finals. There's good stuff in here. Watch. Franco Harris and Gelsayers. Watch.

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allegedly this is the down lebatar show with a Stu gots and now top five moments from our NBA finals live stream with Mero OLI Stan Van Gundy got a job at Amazon and Stan now works for Amazon. He's going to go to Amazon. Oh, congratulations. Thank you, Pop. He's going to be a delivery guy. He's just delivering things for Amazon. It's not a great job.

I thought that he was going to be broke down in Amazon. A new division. With Amazon, you never know. Hard times, hard times, Dad. He's got to deliver packages. So if you need something, he's saying, no. With Amazon, you never know. No, no, no. Hard times, hard times, Dad. He's got to deliver packages. So if you need something in an emergency, Stan might bring it to my house. Stan, don't knock on my door.

Ring the doorbell, please. Yeah, please. Okay, I'll ring the door. O-L-I. Poppy reacts to Samson's poor Spanish pronunciations. Poppy, I want to play some words that David Samson has tried to say in Spanish. You try and guess what they are what is this word? Tetas? Tetas?

Oh Tetas! Let's go! Papi knows one thing. They're singing my song. You said I love this song. Are they singing your song? Yeah. They're singing my song. OK.

Who's singing your song, and what is this song? Bro, that's the thing. Teta. Teta, gallo. Teta, arriba, coño. Teta, fuera. Teta, fuera. Teta, por todo el rato.

Vamos. What about this word, Papi? What about this one? Correcta. Correcta. Correcta. Careta. Seismas. Seismas.

I'm sorry, Papi. That is croqueta. Oh, croqueta. No, di que. Di que. Croqueta. Correcta. Croqueta. Di que croqueta. Di que croqueta, pero no se. Croqueta.

You mean Dave Sanson spent about 15 years in downtown Miami. I know, he's in. He couldn't say croquette. I know, he's in. Very nice. He got no influence from Latin culture. How about this one, Poppy? What's this word?

A guayavera. Oh, that's guayavera! He's not in today. A guayavera. Guayavera. Damn, I think you should use spark plug with the game today. A guy of era. Why era? A spark plug with the tatas all of a sudden. It's a bit of a spark plug.

Tatas? Number five, Sam Morell says he respects the Pistons more than the Pacers. Sam says he respects the Pistons more than the Pacers. Come on. He's not wrong. The Pacers are a veteran team. Come on. 100%. Come on. Yeah, he's not wrong. Come on.

The Pacers are a veteran team. They're deeper, but the Pistons scare me more for the future. I think this is the Pacers one trip. Enjoy it. Enjoy the thunder clapping them, I think in six. And, you know, that's that. But I think the magic in the pistons of the team next year, those are the teams that scare me. The magic are tough, man. They didn't have Jalen Suggs. They play a tough game. He's right about that. They bother. They bother Boston Jalen Suggs. Come home. Yeah. Yeah. Come on. Come home now. Dana's a come home now. J'aienus up. Don't turn his hair white, baby. Come home. Come home. Milk carton.

Milk carton that boy. No. Listen, Detroit was the best season in Nick's face the entire playoff run. Yeah. 100%. And I respect them. I agree with Sam.

Sam's right. Don't boo him. He's right. The pace is ass. Bro, they're just very deep. When you look at the breakdown of the series, Daymond, it makes sense. They're deep ass

Super God God hates Nick fans and that's why that Halliburton shot fell in that's okay And it's like angels in the outfield except it's some fucking demon. Yeah Rest in peace by the way fucking Jim Earth they had to die that Sacrifice his ass for a fucking finals run. He really did? That's crazy. Yeah, they did, yeah. He perished the same day? He did not die on that day.

Yeah. It was a crazy perv. That was the just call me out. It was, yo, that's crazy. He tweeted out. He was like, yo, go Pazes or some bullshit like that. I hate him so much. And then he died right now.

That's crazy. It's crazy. What do you think happened there? That's wild. Too much Lucasfilm. I think he got sacrificed to the gods of the Midwest. Mike Pence was, you know, praying to these gods trying to not allow gay people to get married for years.

That's it. The demons answered their prayers and the Pacers got a finals run, but they will lose in six games. Number four, Jamel says the Knicks firing Thibs is like leaving your wife for a chick with a fat ass. Okay, so here's the problem is like I feel like the Knicks are going to be susceptible to the relationship 80-20 rule, right?

They saw the chick with a fat ass and like they had old girl at home who was doing everything she needed to do. Except playing one in six people. That's okay. girl at home who was doing everything she needed to do except playing more than six people yeah that's okay it's like I feel like they had not gonna cry Mary J Blige at home right and then they decided like I'm gonna leave her for cousin faith from soul food black shit then you don't understand it right now I'm going deep into it I'm going deep down into it, right? Mess around, y'all hit Cousin Faith,

and now you think, like, yo. This is it. This is it. And I feel like this is going to end terribly for the next. She's burying you. For the next coach. Listen. Look, Not Gon' Cry was at home.

She helped you build your business. And she lit your shit on fire because you're such an asshole She did she did and now you're gonna mess around with cousin faith Well, listen who you you boned in the studio and it's gonna be bad those two minutes of cousin faith hitting the Spots that you know saying Mary wasn't hitting at home. Oh, no. Oh, no Goes what are we talking? Oh, no. Oh, no. But at the end of the day, Christian walks in and goes, what are we talking about?

Number three, Poppy makes fun of Jorge Sedano for being a Cubano arrepenten- hang on. Cubano arrepentido. Arrepentido. Poppy makes fun of Jorge Sedano for being a Cubano arrepentido. Now they gotta call you George Sedano. What is this now? They always call me George Sedano. Oh no, I always call you Jorge Sedano. Off with the croquetas.

Do you know- It's Jorge Sedano and croquetas. That's it. That's right. No, but no. Penate, penate, penate, penate, penate. Do you know why they call me George? Because my dad, my puppy was Jorge,

and my mom needed to know who she was gonna yell at, okay? Nah. Nah. Borto y paquete. Nah. Tremendo paquete. Tremendo paqueton. That's the highest of paquete, paqueton.

Where you bought that one, in Macy's? You know what, puppy? No. Get his ass. Puppy, next time, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna tell Lute Yeah, where you bought that one? In Macy's? You know what, Papi? No. What? Get his ass! Papi, next time, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna tell Lute no more I'll cook frijole with you. Oh, no, no.

We're missing the frijole today. That's not fair, that's not fair. You can't take away my black beans. You hit away at hers, George. I know, I know where to go. Number two, Tony reacts to the flagrant hunk on Caruso's nuts Clearly two shots. I just saw that there they might be looking at this. That's gotta be a flagrant. Oh

He goes for his shooting arms brought to you from the guy who said take a look at that in hockey give me a break Foul Little honk there on the bottom there Out here doing some sort of ultrasound on testicular cancer. But at game speed you don't see him go like that. That's the thing. It's too fast. See? Oh look, it's look at me referee Steve Javi. Bang, bang play. Oh, I think that he flopped. He tried it Steve. I think he flopped. Here you go, Dan. Here you go. So he hits him in the shoulders you go boom all right, we're coming around That doesn't make any sense his analysis that was a quick whistle. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense as analysis. That's a flop

Flaker one That's wild. That was a fix. Wait a minute, my father's just down there. Get a hold of that ref. All right, we're going to have to, Bobby, you're going to have to leave. I'm sorry. You're out of control. It's late night.

I'm going to have to get you out of here. No. I got to keep believe. I'll tell you, it's a fix, Bobby. Yeah, that referee, you got to check his credentials out. That guy, that guy. I don't trust him at all. Looks like he's on the take. That referee, you gotta check his credentials out. That guy, that guy. I don't trust him at all.

Looks like he's on the tank. On review, we do not have wind up. We do have a honk. We do have contact. Not a flagrant foul. We do not have a honk. Therefore, we do not meet the criteria. He said no honk, I read it.

I'm telling you. We got an obvious and clear flagrant honk, I read it. I'm telling you. He is a honk! Number 1! Tony, Mero and Poppy sing...oh god. Hang on. Te suelto el pelo? Is that right? Te suelto el pelo?

Alright, this one is a little bit more sensual. We're staying in the Yandere topic, but Te suelto el pelo. Oh, te suelto el pelo! Te quito la camisa! We're staying in the young dead topic, but that's what to a pillow Poppy you want to translate that or you cut me off gar here I let your hair loose. Te quito la camisa. I let go of your hair.

He's playing a refrain. I take your shirt off. Tu pantalón. Well, no, no. Papi, come on. Wait a second. Wait, wait. Papi, I.

Papi, I. Papi, I. Te como conglasa. If your mother is next door, she's going to kill me. You said tetas. Tetas, yes. Papi, you said tetas. And then... If your mother is next door, she's going to kill me. You said tetas. Tetas, yes. Bobby, you said tetas. They're singing my song. That's what you said. And now he says...

But this is getting more right to the point. This is more intimate. This is a lot more intimate. You pull off your pants. Let's start again. I'll let your hair loose I pull your hair I let go of your hair like a me I'll take off your shirt to pantalones right there. That does is cool. Taking your pants off is that. I don't understand why you're stopping there. Just translate for the English audience.

Let's start again. Te suelto el pelo. I will let your hair loose. Te quito la camisa. I will take off your shirt. Tu pantalón. Oh, you're also your panties. Ha ha ha. Y te puede poner la completa. Not your panties. Oh Yeah, every girl I picked up a latin night reggaeton party was was yeah, yeah

That was bumping and it was always like Yeah for sure