The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: Landman Don't Miss

Episode Date: November 3, 2025

"You were the waitress with piercing blue eyes. I was the guy who wrote 'Don't smoke in bed' under the tip." Amin delivers his Weekend Observations and might put in a call to John Cena's agent. Plus, are the Bengals' offense and defense legitimately going to fight each other? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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The tequila. That invented tequila. Broximo.com. Please drink responsibly. Quervo. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stucats podcast. The University of Miami can beat you more ways than any team in college football. They are the best team in college football is, oh, you can't play with them.

They can beat you with big players. plays now, they can beat you with defense. They're not going to do all of the dumb things. They are the balanced thing that doesn't exist in a sport that's gone true parity. Miami looks like they can beat anyone in the nation. It's the most complete one I've seen since the 2001 one. Just complete? More ways to beat you. Miami's got to say healthy.

But the neutral field this year in the national title game is in Miami. It's fixed. It's like, have no question that when Castellanos is being pressured 31 times and Beck is being pressured six. It's fixed. He was brought here to win national championships. You know who said that? Mario Cristobal.

You know who says that privately? Mario Cristobal. So when the standards of national championship, you can't be going around saying 5 and 0, everything's fixed. I think you can say the major problems facing this program are fixed. It's not just, hey, finishing the top four and you have to win one game and you're in the championship anymore. I think we're aware of what the standard is. Okay.

Miami looks like they can beat anyone in the nation. I can say nothing bad about this team right now. This was not Rick's football team that got into the top five. I doubted that team all season long. I never thought that team had the best players. What is this shit that you guys are talking about? Ben Louisville and Louisville is. And they're not going to beat the kids.

The kids are going to beat the shit on this team today. I'm telling you that right now. We spent seven minutes on this show yesterday talking about Mario Cristobal's confidence in the way that he's walking around. I mean, are you kidding me? Did you not hear him interviewed? The way that he is presently carrying himself in interviews is as a man who is really confident in the players that he has.

He was really kind to me. He gave me a lot of time over the weekend as well for ESPN. And he, obviously, it has a lot to do with the current state of the program. I mean, he was really nice and really forthcoming with me. Mario is so confident in his team right now. He can't even convey publicly what he thinks of his team. It's one of those situations where he has to be careful what he says publicly because I just think he's supremely confident.

I think Mario Cristobal has shown over the last, you know, three years. If there's a problem, he'll solve it. Check out the hook while his DJ. Like, Mario Cristobal isn't going to shut you the hell up until he wins the national campaign. That is correct. That is correct. That's cool. But I would say that yesterday's college football talk, as it pertains to Miami Hurricanes, It was just, you know, an embarrassment.

But I don't go to you or Jeremy for ball. That's not what I do. Okay. I don't. You embarrass you. Well, it was terrible. Yes, but you're... I got reached out to by a dozen people.

I was told last week that Carson Beck is better than Cam Ward potentially, and I have not seen anything like that. I don't think anybody told me. I went back and listened to show. Really want to get me excited. Talk about this quarterback we got right now. Real good. All right.

All right. So wait a minute. So you're doing Carson Beck. You're now going to do. He just said better fall camp than camp. Okay, wait a minute. Yes. Hold on.

Oh, wait. This is where the guy that didn't go to fall camp either year tells me that I'm wrong. Maybe we should apply the context of it raining down here for a month straight when we have conversations about Carson Beck. I also think contextually there's been a monsoon at Hard Rock Stadium for a month straight. And that also plays into these rivalry games that are also naturally tighter. I think he's going to really reshape the opinion of him a little bit. Again, it's not going to look like Cam Ward, and it can't for Miami to actually win big-time football. It can't look like that.

The one that makes me know that Miami is good is the win over South Florida because I know South Florida is good. If I put it in an Auburn uniform, you guys would be saying, if I put it in an Alabama uniform, you guys would be saying that's a top 10 team. I think overall it was just a great weekend for the universe sitting Miami. Shout out to that athletics department, Joe Atchabria, the president, Kim Gorby, the SID. I think it's clear whose fault this all is. It's Dan's fault. All the sounds, Dan is the most egregious.

By far. Oh, my God. As I was going through that? It's fixed. Mike, Mike, you ought to be upset with Dan, first and foremost. Come on, man. I'm upset with a team. Why didn't matter that Mario Criswell was nice to me?

It was important context. They threw you under the bus. You could do this any year over the last 20 years, but I think what's different this year is, That's just our show. If you sampled the entire world of college football, they had everybody fooled this year, and it's a huge shame. I don't think we're going to get to have the conversations that we had last year about

resume and whatnot, because I think they're probably going to lose another game. I think that's the big takeaway here is the teams, you have a bigger issue now, which is last three years there's a pattern, teams lock into your tendencies, you've got nothing for them and your team kind of goes into a hole. That can't be happening for years. It's easy year one and year two to blame it on the Manny guys, the Manny recruits. Manny seems to be doing just fine at Duke. SMU has taken a lot of former Manny guys and done a lot of winning in this conference. Hell, they barely do any losing. They've lost one game. I keep seeing like the comparisons to Manny Diaz's ACC record versus Mario Cristimald's

ACR record. Why don't I give a shit about that? Manny Diaz was the coach here. He was awful. do I care what Mani Diaz had an opportunity here. He was terrible. So why do I care about his record? Mani Diaz wasn't the answer. Mario Cristobal has elevated the floor. Now your problem is you just can't get over the hump. You can't get to Charlotte. Like before, we were talking about seven-win football teams, six-win football teams. It's definitely changed, but the frustrating part is the intangible stuff and their inability to respond to it. It's going to be a huge week for them. I know they're favored by 28 and a half against Syracuse. is a program that's had a really difficult year following the injury to Angelie.

Can this team rattle off four in a row to give you a food for thought? Last year, they were told, hey, no playoffs for you because you have zero ranked wins and your defense is trash. This year, potentially, depending on what happens with Pittsburgh, they could have four ranked wins and a defense that's very good and a signature win over potentially one to two playoff teams depending on what happens in the AAC. So I do like their hand. For me, the biggest issue is, I don't think this team can run the table in November.

If they do, I think a month from now, we feel pretty strongly that they have one of the stronger cases when it comes to the CFP. But do they get past NC State? I mean, you know, they play teams well. Mike, when you talk about, you know, Crystal, being a floor raiser and that you just can't get over the hump, how many coaches are there in college football that are that coach that can get you over the hump? It feels like there's less than a handful of them. It's a tough sport. It's like baseball.

Only you multiply the teams by three. There's one team that gets to win. Look at the Jim Harbaugh experience in Michigan. Year after year, couldn't get over the hump. Couldn't get over the hump. Gets lucky with a missed field goal. That was Ryan Day. Look, what were they saying about Ryan Day last year when he loses as a 23rd?

He's probably fired if they don't win the national championship. Probably. Probably gone. Maybe a mutual parting of ways. Mario Cristobal has to win that game. He did so in Oregon. He won a Pac-12 championship and he won a Rose Bowl, but there is rightfully a narrative that follows him.

The only way to correct that narrative is to win. And for whatever reason, a mental thing happens where this team just kind of folds under pressure once teams lock into what they're doing. It's got to start at the top a little bit. Let me ask you something here in regards to Notre Dame. So Notre Dame right now is ranked 10th. If Notre Dame keeps winning and they win their final 10 games of the season, they're going to be a

playoff team. And then that winds up making Miami look good that, hey, best win on their resume is that one. But so you could say, hey, it's a good thing for Miami if they went out there. But is it a good thing for Miami if they went out there? Because they're going to be one of those top 11 spots when maybe you kind of need Notre Dame to lose to open up one of those top 11 spots. And I say top 11 because you know the ACC winner is not going to be ranked in the top 12. So they're going to wind up taking one of those spots essentially. And you know what? Depending on what happens with BYU, the big 12 winner may not be in the top 12. So they may take one of those spots also. Huge game between BYU and Texas Tech. I'd like to entertain all these conversations. I think the

best thing that can happen for Miami in terms of that conversation is to have Notre Dame keep winning. Really? Okay. Yeah. Because the head-to-head matchup has to matter. It has matter. I don't care that it happened first week of the season. They played. You saw which team was better when they played. But Miami's got to keep winning. Right. And right now, I think the biggest problem is no one really thinks Miami can go 4 and O in the next month. No one. No one. Because of how they lost SMU. Because of how they met adversity. So if that's why it's a bigger conversation than even the CFP. I don't care if you afford out a couple of wins here or there. I got to see a change in approach.

I got to see a team respond. I got to see guys that have been committing penalties every game. Suffer the consequences. I got to see them turning around. It's a ridiculous conversation to be having. I would feel good about it down the line. But beat Syracuse. This team can quit.

Beat NC State. Do we have faith that they can? I don't. This is going to make such a great part of the montage when they win the national championship this year. It's going to be hilarious in January 19th. Have you heard of Goldbelly? It's this amazing site I order from all the time. You can get the most iconic, famous foods from restaurants all across the U.S.

And they'll ship it anywhere. It's perfect for hosting Thanksgiving without the stress. And with Black Friday around the corner, it's the best time to line up those holiday gifts that ship right to someone's door. They've got everything, smoked turkey from salt-like barbecue in Texas. Personally, I'm eye on that Hancock lobster mac and cheese for the family Thanksgiving this year. Whether it's a dish from that one-of-a-kind restaurant or meat. meals from world famous chefs, Goldbelly has you covered.

Every time I order from Goldbelly, the food shows up fast, perfectly packed, and tastes just as good as it would in the restaurant. Last time I went with cheese steaks, unreal. So, if you're looking for that perfect holiday gift or want to impress your friends and family with an epic Thanksgiving, go to goldbelly.com and get 20% off your first order with promo code Dan. That's Goldbelly.com code Dan for 20% off your first order. Don Lebatard And then that Stafford Through him 25 and 2 Oh there's a brand new kid in town

Out of BYU Stugats They call him Puka Puka Nakua His quarterback is not named Tua Yeah Yeah he is Puka This is the Dan Lebatar

Show with the Stugats You talk about the Notre Dame lost me or win being something big later on. I know there's a couple teams that have them. What if there's, is there a possibility for Louisville and SMU to both meet in the ACC championship game? If things up top get a little screwy. And then Miami has a loss to one of the ACC champion or the runner up. Again, stupid conversations. Screwing.

They got to play. Screwed either way. Louisville just had a big-time injury to Brown. You got to be, it starts with beating Syracuse, and then we can have those conversations down the line. But right now, it's stupid talk, stupid talk. Stupid talk. There are three ACC teams ahead of both Louisville and SMU and ACC standards. Yeah, but things can happen.

Yeah, things can get scurry. I just wonder when we start having a conversation, because, you know, the big-time programs, when coaches are constantly underachieving, start to have buyout talk. And I just wonder. It's so obvious when you're trolling, like the first word you say. Give me the weekend observations to throw. It is time for it to share his game notes. No one in the media will tell you what happened better than my boy.

I mean. Weekend observations is presented by Miller Light. Zaz! He was labeled a bust. Caught Mono as a rookie. He had a nice little stint in Minnesota. But last night, after four TDs in the first half, Sam Donald, make no mistake, has entered the MVP conversation bar

and ordered bottle service. You have an NFL one? Of course. Come on, man, we're franchising. I thought you were franchised. You know how this works. The guy's in the MVP conversation bar. That means he's in the MVP conversation.

But if he's really doing stuff like, oh, not just in the conversation, like Dominant conversation, he's got bottle service. They murdered Washington last night. Oh, yeah. Big day for kickers. Ryan Fitzgerald lifted the Panthers over the Packers with a game winner Parker Romo missed an extra point dropping the Falcons to the Patriots Will Lutz squeaked the Broncos past the Texans with a 34-yarder

and Cam Little set a record with a 68-yard field goal Only thing bigger than the day for kickers is the balls on Liam Cohen After Cam Little missed three kicks in the last two games Including a point after A little P-A-T Co-untrusted little to kick a 68-yarder. You know what that is? Balls.

Guy can't even get the extra point. You're going to say, oh, yeah, 68-yard. You got that one. Made a 68-yarder yesterday? Yeah. New record. I'm telling you. I thought you saw everything.

I did see everything. They got a short in these goalposts. I'm sorry, man. We can't have 68-yard field goals. By the way, you saw Land-Man? What you know about Land-Man? You're back? Yo.

Okay, here's the thing. Do you think that I am against being able to punch the ball out? Yes, I do. No, I'm not against that at all. I think you are. Sounds like you are. What I am against is, if you miss, you can't just go around punching guys. That was a contact sport.

Lamando missed. Steve Magnolum. Needs to learn how to cover his mouth with the play call sheet. Every time they showed him, he's covering it like this. All right, guys, 25. I'm like, no, you've got to do it up here. Up here. We all can read all the way.

words is you're saying at your mouth. What does a bay leaf taste like? Would I be able to taste its absence? I watch a lot of these Instagram cooking videos and they put a bay leaf in it and I'm like... Just one singular bay leaf too. And they didn't have a bay leaf

and it's missing something. I'll like a bay leaf. It's a strong flavor. Is it? Yes. What does taste like? Tea. Okay. I've never tasted tea in my food. Hey. Stephen A. Smith on the firing of Dolphins

GM Chris Greer Quote This is BS That's the first fire Really? That's what we're doing It was about Tua It was about Mike McDaniel

And the brother gets fire first Stephen A. Smith The Stugats is strong in you Because the brother The other brother didn't get fired So Tucker Kraft Expected to miss time

With a knee injury I guess you could say The Packers production We'll have to continue Without Craft services. That's a showbiz joke, kids. Spurs finally lost the game.

Courtesy of Saturday night in Old Town, Scottsdale. Sunday bruntzine ain't bad either. If it's one thing Halloween taught me is that a lot of people don't like being in on a joke. Sometimes the beauty of a joke is not in making the whole room laugh. Rather, it's in making a few people laugh. And I have the rest of the room wondering, what's so damn funny? I look clearly put by you, by the way.

Thank you. I saw you put that on Twitter. I was like, you know what? This guy. This is going to make it the weekend observations. I mean, few people are as entertaining on mute as Michael Irvin. Oh, yeah, he's great. Matter of fact, everyone, mute, first take, watch it while you listen to me. Pablo Tori played spades with Mori Povitch and Nick Cannon. I never guessed Pablo would know how to play spades. Moly Povic? Yeah. I never gets Mori Vovic's play spades either. But if you had to ask me, Mori or Pablo, which one knows how to play Spades?

I'm picking more. Yeah. Top five things I never guess Pablo could do. O-L-I. Play spades. Number five. Not say something without sounding like he's fighting back laughter. Number four, not have other journalists mad about his reporting but also want to be on his show.

Number three, not dress like Mr. Rogers. He has a closet rehabbing. It's weird. Every time I see him, he's in a cardigan. I'm like, dude. He's got a closet. in the New York studio, Just Cardigans. He comes in, and he changes into it like he's Mr. Rogers.

Number two, not start a conversation tangent without having the appropriate receipts to back up what he's talking about. Folks, he ain't just talking. There's a reason why he saves his things he says. And the number one thing I never could guess Pablo could do withhold the name of his alma mater. How's Pablo's jumper? I don't know.

Got a good jumper, decent jumper. Never played with Papa. We need to see Pablo's jumper. Let's find out. Can't be great. Show Hay is starting to crack. Got to see this? First, during the postgame conversation, he's nodding his head vigorously during the question.

Before the translation has happened. You're like, hey, talk about the job that's so... And he's like, oh, yeah, yeah. I'm like, wait a second. Then, as he's going out, he says, thank you guys, so smooth. I thought Billy D. Williams did the voiceover. All right, thanks, guys. I was like, what?

This guy doesn't speak English? Definitely speaks English better than me. 100%. He's cracking. He can't keep this up. I mean, it's funny with Shohay versus other players, like, of Latin origin, because with them, we never really seem to care if they keep a translator the entire time. But with Shohay, we're mad that he speaks English.

I'm going to tell you why. Because when the Latin players speak English, it sounds like, oh, yeah, your English isn't that strong. This guy, as Zaz says, sounds better than a broadcaster. All right, thanks, guys. I'm like, what, I? Where did he learn I? There's a reason why there's certain somebody in prison. Mm-hmm.

Kike Hernandez should have to give up his World Series share to Andy Pahes and name his next two children, Andy and Pahes. Got that straight from the pages. Miss connection. You're the waitress with the piercing blue eyes. I was the guy who wrote, don't smoke in bed under the tip. At one point, Hornets versus Jazz had nine white players on the court. Whoa!

Or, as complicated Josagaki might say, a great start. Let me tell you about Khan Kanupil. Tua. Blame crowd noise for the number of penalties on offense. Saying, quote, with the Ravens fans, it maybe got a little muffled with my cadence and the crowd noise, and Sarah Michelle Geller was a book report. With raw chicken, you're going to kill somebody.

Unquote. Flacco, 470 yards, 4 TDs, 2 INTs, and a spring. throwing shoulder, gutsy. No one should be rooting more for LeBronis hit than Austin Reeves. It's making money. Tell the truth, you all thought Mahomes was going to do it again after the Bill's missed a field goal. After the game, Mahomes said, you can only learn from so many losses, you've got to learn from it fast. That's a great quote.

Bill's always win the regular season games against them. Or as Tua would say, you can only learn from so man, he fresh, it's our turn. Gator Boots with the pumped up kicks, you better run, Forrest, run! French toast, please. End quote. It's a CTE joke, guys. Diana Rusini, telling us Davis Mills was not on the block, followed by C.J. Stroud concussion.

Forcing Davis Mills into the game. Diana Rusini, I've got my third eye open. Football Luminati coming soon. We all had the same reaction when she said. They're not answering those calls for Davis Mills. Oh, like, really? David's Mills And then that next game he's out there

And you're still asking Really? We're not answering calls for him Cinephope last week Rambo First Blood Part 2 We learned that Rambo had 59 confirmed kills in the Vietnam War Yet during the course of the movie Which takes place over the course of two days in 1985

Rambo has 74 kills Meaning in two days He's killed more than an entire War. Moral the story. Work on your craft kids.

It's never too late to improve. Shot watch, Rambo? I think he should. I never seen it. I think you'd love it. First Blood. And also First Blood Part 2,

Rambo. Yeah. That's not even more. And then Rambo 3, which, by the way, that's my favorite. Famous Rambo tagline. What you choose to call hell. He calls home.

Speaking of hell. Art Bryles. Those are the weekend. Observations. And applause for. Ramble 3, man. Yeah, good job. Don Lebatard.

I win in the margins. I'm like, you're a moneyball of sex? I'm basically Scott Hatterberg for fucking. Stugats. A lot of walks, but I'm on base. When it comes to sex, I'm Scott Hatterberg. Other dudes, they can be Giambi. You know your role you play well?

I know my role. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. You know what Rambo 3 is about? No. He goes to Afghanistan to fight the Soviets. Who wins? Oh, come on. Who wins?

Rambo always wins. The audience. Oh, yeah, we always. How many Rambo's are there? Well, there were the original three, and then they took a long hiatus, and then Stallone brought it back with Rambo, just the self-titled Rambo, and then Rambo last blood. Mm-hmm. And if you remember, Stugat's made a big deal about...

Was that a border town one? Could that, yes, that one is, as has been related to me very problematic. Yeah. The one before the border one, he rips out of trachea, right? Yeah. Yep. He disemboweled somebody in half with a machine gun, a torric gun. He can kill people in a lot of different ways, folks. Now, why is one of them called Rambo Last Blood?

That's the last one that happened, but Stugas famously doubted that it would be, in fact, the last blood, because Stallone can't help himself. He's going to make another Rambo movie one way or another. Yeah, I got to doubt that, too, player. You've never seen Rambo. You strike me as a Rambo kind of guy. Oh, I'm not saying I wouldn't like. I just, I've never seen it. You give off Rambo.

What were you doing in the 80s? Just living my life, man. Not watching movies? He's watching a lot of wrestling in the 80s. I could tell. It's a golden age. And Randy Savage. Hogan.

I saw, I saw, somehow my algorithm, I think I blame Mike. My algorithm sometimes will send me wrestling videos. Oh, yeah, it's good algorithm. But it's like, oh, the time when Booker T and the Rock faced off for the first time. Yeah. And I was, well, I was intrigued. I was like, okay, where does it go from here? Yeah.

What is your favorite wrestling memory as a kid? Not like, as a grown-up, like pre-18-year-old Zaz? Cody Rhodes winning the championship? I was a lot older than 18. All right. Happened two years ago. It's a joke. This is a CTE joke.

My favorite, probably Hulk Hogan and Andre a Giant. Yeah, I was six years old, WrestleMania 3. That's probably my favorite. What happened? Andre won No, Hogan won He body slammed them Who's your favorite OC

Hold on What happened there It's contagious man How do you do this about my favorite memory Is oh yeah who won I don't know I popped when Sting Got Over the hump

The Great American Bash Beat Rick Flair He had red white and blue Surfer Sting I was a WCW guy I'm in a little bit of a pickle here That was My movie theater sells pickle

Oh, yeah, how much, man? $2. Hell of a deal. So, I'm trying, not trying, I'm going to. I'm going to. I'm going to go to Sina's last match next month. Is it really his last match or is this a last blood situation? No, it's his last much. A lead company.

Saturday night's main event in D.C. next month. Mike, have you seen these ticket prices? Yeah, they're insane. Holy crap. I don't know what I'm going to do. It's like, I've already got my flight booked. I don't think it's a show yet. Is it face or is it the resale?

Both? What weekend is it? December 13. I've discovered this. This sounds real naive of me. But I've discovered that there's like a scam happening. What's that? Where the face value tickets are showing us sold out because all the bots ate them up.

But coders can go in and go into the face value site and get them still at face value by just putting in some code. Oh. Which means all of this is massive. massively artificial in terms of the... It feels like a racket. Right? Like, that's what's happening here. You're all getting scammed on these resales

because it's not like, oh, yeah, this one scalper got him. No, it's all like an illusion designed to drum up business, basically, and make the tickets more desirable. I mean, it's going to be one of the hottest tickets ever for an arena show. Cheapest lower-level seat. You want to guess right now?

Cheapest lower-level seat. Lower level seat. It's in D.C., It's in Washington, D.C. Sina's last match. It's going to be John Sina's last match. You're saying it's not a last blood situation. No, it's definitely his last match.

Is he going to wear jorts? Probably, yes. You think he's going to win? I have no idea. I'm going to go $700. $500. $500 is the cheapest lower level seat. And it's like at the very top of the lower level, you know?

$500. Is there an equivalent of the behind-the-basket seat in wrestling or is it all just a ring, right? No, there's not really an equivalent to that. No. You know what I discovered? I went to a boxing match a couple of years ago. Shout out to George Sedano hooked it up. And it was not ringside, but it was like two rolls off the rings.

It was really good seats. And what I discovered is when you're that close, the, what are they called? The ropes? The ropes, yeah, literally the ropes. You having trouble thinking about what those are called? Yeah, but CTE. The O-C. The fun kind.

It obscures, I'm watching the fight like this the whole time because the rope are in the goddamn way. Well, this is terrible. You know what they should do? Clear glass? No. They should have no ropes. No. You can keep the ropes.

They should put the whole ring in a pit. And so now we're looking down. And we all have kind of a view of it. And almost like a Roman Coliseum, we're yelling and throwing shit. Look, that's go sit in the upper level. No, no, no, no. You can get that experience. No, no, no.

It's cheap. I want to be ringside, too. I want to hear and taste and smell all the sights and sounds. Taste. Yeah, you know, sometimes they hit them in a fly down. You're going to have to be front row for that to work, though. What's up? You're going to have to be front row for that door.

I know, but they're in a little pit, so I'm kind of looking over on them. They actually do have mixed martial arts that... In a pit? That happened in a pit. Wow. They also have ones that don't have cages, too. No cages? Yeah, they can just run around?

I don't like that. Within a reason. I want them to be able to run around the entire arena. It's tougher. I just feel like... You got to catch them. Well, if that's the case, then it's not who's the best fighter. Now, who's the best avoider.

strategy though that's a real life application i feel like i'd be a pretty good fighter in those conditions you got to run away i'm shifty i can i always have this you ever watch movies and they're like they're chasing people and they're going through the staircase whatever and i'm like dog just get off on the floor and then go back upstairs everyone thinks you're going down in the same direction just double back oh my god you haven't seen the mike mire's challenge though no what's the mike mire where like someone's walking to you oh run away and you're like Michael Meyer. Yeah, I thought, oh, yeah, baby.

Austin powers here. I thought you meant the former left-handed reliever for the Yankees. So who, back to the original point here, who is setting me up with tickets for John Zina's final match? That's, that's the movie. You know, I'm going to tell you what, man. I used to, I used to be wrapped by the same agency as John Sina. I got his, his agent's number. I could put in a call.

Wow, those tickets are so expensive. It's going to cost you. They actually reserve quite a bit of seats for those events. Go on. Where they put in VIPs. So we need to elevate your profiles. It'll be one of those VIPs. But this one's going to be a really difficult ticket because it's not a stadium show, as you mentioned.

And the president's probably going to be there. That's what I hear. Is he? Yeah, apparently. He says he wouldn't miss it. What? Yeah. I feel like there's a lot of shit going on in the world, but it kind of prioritize a little bit over.

I take off a night. What's a good? He just had a Gatsby party two nights ago. Really? He's chilling. Does he dress up? Who? Trump.

He dresses as Trump. Like a red tie? It was a Gatsby theme party around him. Oh, so he's... Oh, is that a boat guy? Everybody goes in character. He goes in character. This is Donald Trump.

If I was in the gate Gatsby... You guys look great here. Wow, look at you. They would have called it the greater Gatsby. The best Gatsby. The best Gatsby. The best Gatsby they ever had. The greatest Gatsby.

You know, they had it out in Long Island. I said, it's a little too far. I don't like it. I don't like it. We'll have it a Trump Tower. Let's be careful. He's speaking across the... Oh, yeah, it's tomorrow, right? It's tomorrow. How are we going to do? Oh, Wednesday is Wednesday. Or Wednesday? What are you guys going to do? Are you guys going to try to commute through this shit?

I buy two tickets. Probably get arrested. I'll be front row. For the first time ever, I'm taking the train here tomorrow to avoid that traffic. You're going to brightline it? Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah, first time. Are you going to go premium? I thought about it. No, it's unnecessary. It's unnecessary?

Because if you're going somewhere like on a weekend, you can have free drinks on there. Like the only, what is the benefit of that premium? I mean, you get a free coffee, free breakfast. It's like a 15-minute ride. It seems like a waste. I thought it was free booze, right? Yeah, but on the way to work. I'm coming to work, dog.

You'll be working even better. Think about every idea you've ever had when you were drunk. Wasn't it so much better thought out? We should buy a bar. Absolutely. I'm looking forward to Tony's top five from across the street in two days. Should I save it? I was going to do it tomorrow

I'll do it Wednesday You can feel the energy Dog, man Are you kidding me? I think Messi's going to be there We're going to be able to get in here The graphics is incredible Because it looks like

Messy's at like the top of it Yeah, have you seen the graphic? It looks like Donald Trump's decided to run a 4-4-3 No way No way Do we have that picture? Can we throw that up somewhere?

I'll pull it up on my phone here While we're pulling it up, we've got to talk about what's happening with the Bengals. Oh, my God. I've never seen this before. Talk about things that we never see. So, you know, like, there's always this undercurrent on some of these teams where either the defense is really great and the offense is holding him back. They can't score.

Or the offense is really great and the defense is holding them back. And everybody just kind of like supports each other, you know? You don't want to say the wrong thing. The Bengals, they appear to be doing the complete opposite here. So the Bengals' defense is apparently historically bad, all right? It's three historically bad teams on defense in a year, Dolphins, Ravens, and Bengals. Good point. So the Bengals had a big comeback against the Bears, and the defense couldn't hold them in the end,

and the Bears won 47 to 42. And it seems like the Bengals' offensive players have had enough. So here's Chase Brown. All right, Chase Brown, Bengals running back, and he is straight up telling you the event sucks. We just got to play complimentary football. Like, we put the ball in the end zone and go up a point at the end, finish the fucking game. Like, just end it. Like, that's it.

Like, that's, like, that's what we need to do. Just end the fucking game. Like, make them get us the ball back. Let us go to 22 victory and let's end the game. That's how I feel. Any playmaker on this team, any position. And, like, we're all willing to do whatever it takes to win. We just got to finish.

I think that's, like, what you go into this bi-week. Thinking and kind of repeating to yourself is just finish, finish, finish, finish these goddamn games. Please finish them. When do you ever hear a player talk about the other side of the football like that? Here's... What's that? Surely he was the only one talking like that. Nope.

What? Here's... And these are star players, especially this guy. Chamar Chase or any of the leaders on the offense is it good to get on the defense

or stay in your lane I'm gonna stay in my lane I don't want no defensive player come and chew me out about what the I'm doing and so apparently

He's supportive He said I'm gonna stay in my lane Apparently defensive players were laughing about the way the game ended I think the offense

and the defense I think they're gonna fight each other I think they're actually I think they're gonna come up Put them in a pit Yeah that's right Oh, no cage.

So you got to catch him. That involves some of the football skills, right? How elusive are you? The only thing that brought me peace, watching Al Golden's defense struggle like that. A little bit of decompression. Al Golden is still alive and working, huh? He's young.

Still alive. He was the D.C. for Notre Dame. He was a hot candidate. Yeah. Wow. What is he? Just in his 50s, right? 56 years old.

Really? Still alive. Dog, that really scares me. It means me and Al Golden aren't that far off in age. I don't like this. I like the day when all the coaches were, like, 100 years old than me. Every coaching hire is, like, younger than you now. I know, man.

It's crazy. I don't think it was Mario. Mario's in his early 50s. Yeah. See, like, it looks good. Brent Key, I think Brent Key and me went to Georgia Tech at the same time. I'm not sure. I can't confirm it, but I'm pretty sure.

Yeah, he was there when Joey Hamilton. Oh, shit, man. 99. I mean, Dan was freaking out last week because the Nationals manager that they hired is 33 years old. And someone reached out to me, their president is 35. They don't have a GM. have two assistant GMs, they're 31 and 33. They're going to f*** up.

That's crazy. There's no way you can have that many young people. They can mess up, but they'll have a job. That's true. They'll build himself back up. You old, you get out of a job, it's a wrap. That's right. Unless you're Vic Fangio.

Somehow you still get jobs. Well, he's just satisfied being a coordinator. He did the coach thing one time, just to say he did it, but he's also better as a DC. I'm a breastbox guy. I'm telling you, man. It's a lot less stressful. A lot less, because nobody's asking you questions. That's the thing.

Everyone asking questions. When you're your head coach, you've got to answer a lot of questions. That's why you get $54 million to be Brian Kelly. You ain't got to answer no more questions. Just kick my legs up. Ask me questions for that money. I'll give you answers. There'll be no holding back.

Tony, speaking of no holding back, Pelicans. Let's talk about the pelicans really quick. I think the NBA needs to do a bailout. I think contraction is the word you're looking for. We need something. Bailout means like, hey, I think this thing is salvageable. We'll just give you some stuff. I don't know.

Right now, it looks like the worst situation in the NBA, right? Like, you trade away your first round pick to a team in the Hawks that basically gave you the rights to get a Derek Queen who's like, that trade is not that good. And also the trade for the Indiana pick, which now turns into a more interesting pick too because they're not good. Like the Pacers did the deal like right after the day of the finals. They're like, yeah, okay, we'll do the trade. Okay, fine. So here's the thing. I tell people this all the time.

Sometimes teams do a deal and then in retrospect, we're like, oh, that's. was a bad deal, right? So, for instance, the Clippers trading for Paul George and obviously Shago does Alexander winning that deal. Yeah, everyone thought it was a good deal. At the time, everyone was like, yeah, you do it because you got quiet. And now we look back like hindsight 2020, that's a bad deal. The Derrick Queen deal, on the day it happened, we're like, what are you doing? The minute it happened. What are you doing? Like, do you think Joe Dumars did he try to get it protected and they were just like, no, no, no, it has to be unprotected? This is what I've discovered most of the time when you're seeing a pig

that goes unprotected and it's not like for a superstar player right it was move up what three spots it's yeah most of the time they never ask they never ask you guys had uh you're on uh last week right your own weissman who wrote the hollywood

endings book about the lakers and he said the pelicans had to explain to rob what a swap is what a pick swap is like most of the time if something happens like what it's not because they fought, they negotiated tomorrow and finally you win, it's because

nobody asked. Like you're telling me if Joe Dumar said we'll trade you a first round pick but it's top five protected. The Hawks would be like nah, nah, nah, it has to be like, why didn't he ask? I'm telling you he said how much to move up to swap picks with you guys. It's going to cause you your first deal. That's

I'm not reporting. I'm telling you typically what happens. They're 0 and 7. They're getting beat by 30 every single night outside of a couple days. He's a walking dead man. He's a walking dead man but like is there a worse situation in the NBA than a star player who is in and out of the lineup who's not that good right now in Zion Williamson you have nothing to look forward to you have no first round picks he got absolutely nothing you know what happened you trade him for quiet

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