The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: TAYLOR, DEFEND YOURSELF!!! (feat. Anthony Williams a.k.a. Jason 'The Jet' Mason)
Episode Date: April 2, 2025Anthony Williams is the George Mason runner featured in yesterday's picture of Taylor's track meet. He joins us today to set the record straight. Donate to his charity: The Devin Brewer Foundation. Al...so, we learn the incredible details of Charlie and Domonique's night out in Miami. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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This is the Don Leventor Show with the Stookats Podcast. It's time for Against the Spread.
And it's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings.
DraftKings, the crown is yours.
Jess, what do we got?
I'm taking the Yukon Huskies in the final four
against UCLA minus eight and a half.
I think Yukon's offense is too much,
too multifaceted for UCLA to handle.
I think they win that game easily.
Again!
Again, so true!
Again, so true!
Again, so true!
Again, so true!
Again, so true!
Again, so true!
I'm gonna head to the ice,
where the Panthers are taking on the Toronto Maple Leaves in
Toronto.
Now Toronto is coming in winning two straight, the Panthers are coming in losing two straight.
Teams have played against each other twice this year.
Panthers have beat the Maple Leaves both times that they faced each other.
Again, one is coming in hot, one is coming in cold.
Is this the game where the Maple Leafs take down
the defending Stanley Cup champion, Florida Panthers?
Maybe, I don't know, but I'm gonna take the Panthers
plus one and a half because one and a half goals
is a lot in hockey, so I'm not saying the Panthers
are gonna win or lose, but I think they're gonna cover
agains the Sprint!
Thank you for doing that guys.
We also have, I believe that we're closing in
on an interview with Jason Mason,
the runner who was behind our beloved Taylor in that race.
We also have my guy Jason Goff,
who's a podcast host at The Ringer.
He joined me last night in going out with Charlie
in Charlie's High School Friends.
So I'm gonna bring Jason in at some point
to tell all the embarrassing stories
from Charlie's high school experience.
But I guess Jason could probably come in too for this topic.
Jason's a big basketball guy.
He works for the Bulls pre and post game show, I believe.
Yeah, him and Kendall Gill.
Yep.
But this topic, I meanin got beef with our coverage,
or our opinions on John Morant from yesterday, right?
Yeah, man, you guys really dropped the ball.
You're talking about why Taylor Jenkins was fired
this late in the season, by the way.
I don't think we have a definitive answer for that,
because it's kind of ridiculous.
I don't know if you guys,
I can't remember if you guys mentioned this.
His entire staff had gotten fired prior to this season,
which in the NBA is the ultimate,
get your black ass up out of here, right?
Even though his name is Jenkins, he's white.
But number two, you guys talk about the offense,
you can't piss off the best player.
It wasn't his offense.
It wasn't his offense.
The offense was devised by, get this,
the two new assistants, one of whom is now the
head coach and the other one is fired.
And I'm just like, wait a second, hold on.
You're going to take my staff away from me.
You're going to hire somebody else that I didn't have a say in.
Then you're going to tell these somebody else's to devise the offense, even though our offense was okay last year, right?
And then when the star player doesn't like it,
you're gonna use that as an excuse to get rid of me.
This is, ladies and gentlemen,
not like Taylor Jenkins misstepping or whatever.
This is classic textbook, we're getting you up outta here.
So who wanted him up outta there?
You're saying, oh, okay.
The WizKid Wall Street front office that thinks that, hey, man, let me give this head coaching
job to this man from Finland who's never been in an NBA capacity in any form or fashion
prior to this season when we brought him here from his illustrious record of winning the
Euro Cup and the Basketball Champions League and every other league over there that's not
really one of them heralded ones that come to this way this guy isn't David
Blatt and I'm not trying to I'm not trying to knock him he might be the best
coach of all time one day I don't know I don't know because his resume is super
thin he's not David Blatt David Blatt came here this do one Euroleagues
who coach like the biggest clubs in europe
but the uh... national team coaching
he had a real resume
unfortunately didn't have an nba resumes of the nba guys didn't really respect
them and and he didn't do himself any favors either
in this case
uh... thomas easel owes his name
he comes from as i, from coaching in Germany,
in France, some okay clubs at okay levels,
but not the highest levels of European basketball.
Not domestic and not the continental championship
of the Euro League.
And this is the guy who's going to be the head coach
of your NBA franchise now. That to me is the galaxy brain of like front offices
where like, I know the best coach, he's not even here.
Like, oh, oh, you guys are listening to that?
Like, oh, I know this indie band
that only plays for five people.
That's what they're doing.
Can you make it make sense though?
Like I get it, I think the harder,
if you can't, that's fine.
But the harder, the easier thing to do is like,
this doesn't make any sense, this is crazy,
they're just trying to be way ahead of anybody.
If I was challenging you to make a positive argument
for this decision, because I think we all were,
even if you say that we had it wrong,
we all agreed that it was shocking
and it didn't quite give them the best chance.
How could someone convince themselves
that this is gonna be good?
I would say the only reason I can think of,
and it's a pretty dastardly one
from a basketball standpoint,
is oh shit, if we let him rock with this,
what if he goes on a huge playoff run
and then we gotta keep him?
I really want my indie pick from Finland.
You get rid of him now. My argument was you knew he wasn't your guy the moment you fired his entire
staff and gave him his assistant coaches. Why didn't you just fire him then?
Why give him the, oh well we owe it to him. Why you didn't owe him to him nine more
games in a playoff run then? So to me it's just, again this is just a
ridiculousness of NBA front offices that far too often skate
we we're really good at blaming coaches we're really good as a culture like it's all the
coaches I can't believe that we never bring up the front offices role in all this and
you of all people Dominique Mr. Tankin is bad like I would think that you would be Mr.
call out all these front offices out here
instead of picking on poor Taylor Jenkins, man.
I didn't pick on poor Taylor Jenkins.
You called him a bum and you told him
to get the hell up outta here.
I didn't call him a bum and tell him
to get the hell up outta here.
I did, he's a bum.
You called him that.
No, I think that I was embodying the voice of the team
where it's like you bum, get up outta here.
I don't think Taylor Jenkins is a bum.
I'm not qualified to evaluate Taylor Jenkins as an NBA coach. But I do think that
understanding that the party responsibility is creating buy-in. And I think that's become
more of a job for coaches than it has been in the past. And I think this speaks to some
of the things that you were saying earlier about how you talk to players now is kind
of different. The way that you have to manage the team now
is different than it was in the past.
And just saying like, John Miranda's being petulant
is not gonna be a defense.
And I don't know where you got that voice from.
I know you like to do imitations,
but you don't hear that bass?
You don't hear that melanin?
I think he was just throwing shade,
just trying to come at you.
He was, he was trying, that's all right.
That's all right, I'm secure.
Look at me, I got a haircut yesterday.
Well, it's easy to be insecure around me.
It's easy.
All right, easy.
Hold on.
He's a sniper.
He's a talented sniper at that.
He's got the whole affect of basketball insider,
genius, knowledgeable man,
but he can also be cool in the streets.
Hey Jason, what's the fix?
So he's got that two prong attack.
Jason, how's the flock doing?
You need to, so this is why you don't make friends
in this industry because they let you down at some point
by being themselves truly and then they do it upon meeting.
Like the first time I actually interacted with Amin,
he really cut me deep.
You know, fresh off a flight, I was wearing a suit,
I was taught to dress up when you get on airplanes,
you know, first generation born here,
my foreign appearance instilled that in me,
and I do that to this day.
You get off a flight, you should look good.
Had to go to a meeting where Amin was there.
You can call it a meeting.
It was a meetup.
We were at Tap 42 at Aventura Mall.
Hey, I don't know where I'm at.
I don't know where I'm at.
It's a city that I don't frequent.
You know, I gotta make sure.
It's one of those mixers they do.
Like, yo, it's a mixer.
And I'm like, all right, cool.
They have a great chopped salad there.
I wish I'd have known, Jess.
Sorry.
I'd have worn my chopped salad suit.
But instead, I pull up, and he called me a shady youth pastor because I look like a young man who was a role model,
you know, instead of these dregs of society running around
in t-shirts and shorts and, you know, cutoffs.
You know, like, I had to show up.
You look great today.
Hey, first, thank you.
You look great today.
I appreciate it.
I've never said he doesn't look great.
He's always very well dressed.
I'm just saying, on that day...
He was overdressed a little bit.
He looked like he might have embezzled
from like the nightly.
He looked like he said, close the door.
He was a gentile.
Close the door.
We not leaving until the congregation raises $40,000.
40 wrecks.
40 wrecks.
He said he found Jesus down in Miami, on South Beach.
And that's why I must go. That's where most people find Jesus, Miami, on South Beach, and that's why I must go.
That's where most people find Jesus, is down on South Beach, right?
The morning after.
You were looking for him.
I don't know if you found him.
That's why these coaches don't get no respect now, because they're not dressing like the
gentleman that they used to have to dress like.
Now they out here in basketball clothes and stuff.
Exactly.
The likes of Amin Elhassan, you know, shooting down their dreams. Now, that's the problem too when you draft a talent that you know is going to be wildly
impactful in your city and change your basketball culture.
You just have to hope that he's mature enough to get you through some of the bad coaches
as well, right?
Or some of the bad front office management.
Like, I'm glad you mentioned that thing about front offices because there are too many NBA front offices
running around that aren't up to par,
and all we do is cycle through coaches
that are good coaches.
How long did we know Kenny Atkinson was a decent coach
before Brooklyn had to let him go
and now he's doing what he's doing in Cleveland
with talent and people who buy in?
Like that, that he was a good coach in Brooklyn
and the knock on him was like,
yeah, but those guys don't like you.
That's all right, so.
Caris Laverde is really not,
you know, Spencer Denwood is on your side.
So you're out, and then it's like,
all right, that was it, buddy.
Go ahead.
And that phenomenon is even bigger
when it comes to black coaches.
Don't be a black coach and get fired.
That might be it.
JB, get on back to our assistant.
JB is like the exception to the rule.
West-Ansel Jr.
Where's West?
West is a good example, right?
West is the rule.
Steven Silas.
So as long as I worked in the NBA,
Steven Silas has been in the NBA,
everyone's always like this guy.
All these players that I know
played with, you know, where he was an assistant,
that guy's great, he's gonna be a great head coach. I was stopping for him when Billy got the bull's job. everyone's always like this guy, all these players that I know who played with, you know, where he was an assistant,
that guy's great, he's gonna be a great head coach.
I was stopping for him when Billy got the bull's job.
So, Steven Silas gets the job in Houston, finally.
All right, Harden got Westbrook,
you're gonna take us to this next era of post-Mike Danton.
He's like, cool.
And then, like, Harden's like, I wanna get traded.
And then Westbrook's like, I wanna get traded too.
And so, essentially, he's given a bunch of babies.
Kids, yeah. Kids, basically, who don't know anything. Not that they're not talented, but they're just not, traded too and so essentially he's given a bunch of babies kids basically who
don't know anything not that they're not talented but it's just not not a team
that's ready to win and he gets fired and I'm like like does Steven Silas get
a fair shake and then once he's out does he get a shake anywhere else that's it
how does that translate to the NFL though cuz like guys like Sean McDermott
don't give him a chance over there.
We give him a chance and then if you mess up,
that one time you out.
We're talking about coaches period.
That black coaches, you know you're not coaching
an NFL team.
But guys like Sean McDermott who pop up or remember,
who was it back in the day?
Like the black coach was Sherman Lewis, I believe it was.
Man, he's a great offensive coordinator,
but boy he ain't never gonna get a head coaching job.
Like the guys who stick in the NFL every once in a while,
like where did this guy come from?
You give them a quarterback next thing you know
they're there for half a decade.
We'll get back to that in a second,
but we have a guest.
No.
We got him.
We got him.
We got Anthony Williams AKA Jason the Jet Mason
in the building, the man who cooked that bum Taylor.
What's up, Jason Mason?
How you guys doing, man?
What's up, man?
How you doing, man?
I'm doing well.
His name's Anthony.
I called him Anthony.
I'm sorry, Anthony.
I didn't mean no disrespect.
I thought Jason Mason was a cool nickname.
That's dope.
He was flying around the track.
Taylor, I will have you know Jason.
So welcome to the show.
Thank you so much.
Appreciate it very much.
Taylor been popping trash talking about how he cooked you
and he could cook me and cook everybody on the track.
I was wondering sir, if you have any rebuttal
to what Taylor was saying about that speed.
That would be a good collection.
You remember.
You even remember.
Yeah, you probably don't remember Taylor.
So my buddy actually sent it to me.
Did some research, so for Taylor,
our team actually won that race.
Taylor ran a great leg, I'll give him his credit.
I'm not a 400 runner, I was a hurdler in college,
in high school, state champion, all-American.
There you go, resume.
I'm a hurdler, college in high school, state champion, all American. There you go, resume. So I'm a hurdler. I'm not a 400 specialist,
but we did win that race as a team, so we got that.
You let young Calvin Sampson pull away from you.
Does it sound like what you said to me?
Is that he increased the gap.
I'll tell you what I heard.
I remember he had some wheels on him.
I'll give him that.
Aw, that's even more shade.
Taylor, get up here. We need to hear from Taylor. He had some wheels on them. I'll give him that
A10 champ salute to you Anthony. I appreciate you appreciate you I believe we got the baton at the same time and I handed it off before you but
They're here nor there. That's fair. That's fair
You were athlete I give you credit man. I give credit where it's due man
Taylor and but like I said four by four is not my thing You know, you were an athlete, I give you credit, man. I give credit where it's due, man. And, ball track. Taylor, again, you truly respect. Taylor, Anthony.
But hey, like I said, four by four is not my thing.
I'm a hurley.
Everyone's saying.
Taylor, Anthony's saying like, this is a hobby for him.
The thing that he was actually great at, state champ.
He was putting up numbers and banners.
A-10 champ, conference champ.
All right, so what banners were you putting up?
I quit after my first year.
I will say this. everyone's being very respectful
to each other, but Anthony, I will tell you
that Taylor had his numbers out there on the computer
and he was circling his comparisons to yours
and he was saying that he was faster
than you in high school.
No.
That's tough.
Like I said, I'm a hurdler, hurdling is my specialty, man.
You know what I can tell though?
Are we judging Nelly by his country album?
No, we're not doing that.
I can tell a dog when I meet one.
And Taylor, you're not a dog.
I'm listening to my man Anthony.
No, no, no.
Wait, Taylor, start barking.
Hold on.
Get that garbage off the screen. It is, I hear, I hear it in his voice.
I see it in his posture.
That is a calm, confident man.
Tailor, you turning red back there.
You got beads of sweat on your head.
You stuttering and stammering.
Well, I quit, I quit.
And the panoramic roof is providing that as well.
I can see all that.
That man.
The roof won the race, by the way.
I'm not just being honest with you.
You can put your hands up against the TV screen
and feel the heat.
They just know that.
I saw Taylor pull up today on a scooter,
and my dog got a roof that you can see through.
It wasn't even electric either.
It was manual.
That's how it was manual. Taylor was
on his foot. Taylor defend yourself, god damn it. Taylor was scooting like punky bruce
in the work while my dog Anthony got a convertible 24-7. That's a family car by the way. That
man is in a spaceship. Oh yeah. Anthony showed up on my show in a spaceship with redwoods behind him.
Where you at, Anthony?
You in a national park.
This is classic DB Talk.
I'm at work, man.
I'm on my lunch break.
Oh, he handling light work on his lunch break.
I'm going to come out here and get a little snack,
and my snack's going to be named Taylor.
Oh, I like that.
Hey, I don't want to hear nothing from you, no, no, no, no.
Get out of here, Scoot.
Scoot.
This is classic DB talk where I've been saying to Dominique, let's go.
And all he keeps doing is talk, talk, talk.
I got my running shoes on.
The reverse card.
I'm ready.
I like the reverse card.
I showed Chris Cody where we could do this race and Dominique shows up today.
He goes, ah, I think I might be hurt.
I think I might be hurt. That is everything that I've said so far is true.
I did not fake an injury.
What I did, what today, I walked in and I looked at you
and I sized you up and you ain't had no engine.
And I got more confidence.
Wait, let me see your cakes, Ter.
See what?
It's fine, I think it's fine.
No engine, daddy, you can't, there's no burst in there.
There's no power in that. Can we see Anthony's? No, Anthony don't can't, there's no burst in there. There's no power in that.
Can we see Anthony's?
Nope, Anthony don't need to show, he won already.
Look at that man.
Where are you Anthony, if you don't mind me asking,
what part of the world?
So I'm in South Carolina, so after Mason joined the military,
eight years Army.
Thank you for your service.
Yo, he is winning on every
Babies last week you
You know what Taylor over here eating lunch before it gets laid off everybody
That's the type of dude he is. Just so you know, Anthony is that,
Taylor's the type of dude that they set out the lunch
and we don't go on break to get lunch
and Taylor out there just squirreling away
little sandwiches so we can get some.
And he's out of here, scoot, scoot.
I appreciate it, man.
So you said you joined the military,
you're still in the military now?
No, so I'm a veteran, fresh veteran.
Last day officially was March 7th so.
Congratulations on a great career brother.
Thank you for your service.
Yeah man, thank you.
It's plenty to serve, thank you.
Thank you.
What branch?
Army.
Oh yes!
My dad did 20 in the army man.
Oh, thank you dad!
My dad did 20.
This is the greatest black role model that has ever been on this show.
Ever.
It's him or me.
Ever.
Like I said, ever. This is the greatest black role model that has ever been on this show. Ever? It's him or me.
Ever.
Like I said.
Ever.
Oh man.
Well, thank you so much for joining us.
Any parting words you want to have for Taylor or anyone?
No, it's all love.
If you got Shameless Plug, there's a track meet for My Best Friend Passed Away, Devin
Brewer Invitational.
So I'll drop you guys
a link or something if you want to submit.
We have a scholarship foundation, so.
Like I said, all love.
Taylor, hey, blessings to you, man.
He's gone already.
Man, I love this guy.
We fired Taylor.
I love you at this segment.
When they kill you, a kindness.
That's what I was, this whole time,
this is the worst kind of enemy.
You know what I'm like, they're like,
hey man, I wish you and your family nothing but the best
and hopefully your children can look in your eyes
and see a winner when they think about me.
We'll put that in the show notes
and we'll definitely make a contribution.
We appreciate everything that you've done for us.
Thank you so much for joining our show.
The final question though is, what's your Uber rating?
Ooh.
You're a four four nine guy?
Are you in the-
This is the only way Taylor's gonna get a win by the way.
Are you a dot nine boy?
Are you a dot nine boy or nah?
I prefer to drive myself places,
so I'm not really a-
There you go.
Oh, I know!
Good answer!
Good answer!
Good answer, USA!
USA!
USA!
USA!
USA!
USA! USA! USA USA
Javontay
Thank you man, thank you for joining us
I looked up your middle name, that's how I know you fast
Anybody named Javontay that way
Yeah that's... oh man
Hey friends, it's Jarrah Bear here
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Weather is starting to warm up,
regular season's starting to wind down,
games of consequence in sports starting to ramp up.
I know what you're gonna need by your side.
It's by my side already, Miller Lite. Yeah, that's right. I'm making my springtime a Miller time.
I'm making my sports time Miller time. Going to a car race? Miller time. Gonna see some tennis?
Miller time. Gonna chill in the backyard with some friends and make some memories?
Miller time. I love Miller Lite because it's got taste that I know I can depend on.
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Hey audience, you know, it's that time of year
where everyone is debating who the number one pick
is going to be.
Well, let me tell you something that is undebatable.
Who the world's number one vodka is.
That is Smirnoff.
And as fun as it is to debate whether or not
the team with the number one pick goes pass rush, or wide receiver, quarterback. One thing that we all know is we're going with Smirnoff and as fun as it is to debate whether or not the team with the number one pick goes pass rusher, wide receiver, quarterback, one thing that we all know is we're going with Smirnoff as our number one vodka pick.
Isn't that right Dano?
Smirnoff rules!
Smirnoff rules!
So while you're over there hosting your draft parties you know one thing in particular you need, well there's two things that you absolutely need.
The draft on TV, that's a must.
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Smirnoff. God bless football is doing their first ever watch along live stream in front
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More details to come.
Please drink responsibly.
Smirnoff, number 21 vodka, distilled from grain,
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Woohoo!
Don Levitard.
I took my son to the barbershop, get a haircut, and my man gave out some Limp Dap.
Oh no.
Oh damn, damn, damn.
Stugats.
I disowned him, I threw him right under the bus.
I was like, whose kid is that out here dishing out Limp Dap?
This is the Don Lebatard Show with the Stugats. show with these two guys I don't know how I feel about you my bread that was
great what we're all gonna make donation no no no I'm in I we brother well not on behalf of Dan LeBattar. I don't like media will be donating three no
My feeling is we're a team because go man. I I was planning to make the contribution, but I said is we like
Many ago fun me I would have thought I would have thought the wrong way to do that was say I will make a donation like I intentionally say
If I say I'm going to make a donation then it puts everyone in awkward situation to also have to say aye
So I mean I I should have said aye on behalf of Amin and Jason and everyone else I'm going to make a donation
Yeah, do that. Yeah, make it big too. I mean, whoa, whoa, chill, chill, chill. I said I'm gonna put some on it.
I said I'll put some on it.
I'm not trying to send.
How much?
I'm not trying to send all the kids to school.
When you said it, me and Golfman, I got that.
Immediately, like, hey bro,
we got a two month old and an eight year old.
I got my own charities I gotta take care of.
Me too.
Travel basketball, man.
That's a lot of money.
Oh my God. He can still hear all this. man. It's a lot of money. Oh my god.
He can still hear all this.
He was on the Zoom the whole time.
Oh yeah, I saw.
I saw, I could see him.
That's fine to me.
You're laughing?
Yeah.
How's Taylor?
Should we check on Taylor?
That was rough.
That was rough for him.
Getting a snack?
Ooh, Taylor did his best.
He tried to redirect it to me.
That was a smart move.
That was a good move.
But what he don't know is.
He's actually walking to get food right now. I knew it. I told y'all. Got him in the kitchen. Move doesn't good move, but what he don't know is
I knew it. I told y'all
This setup though, let me this is a majestic setup by the way, I gotta be honest I've been around a lot of things and a lot of entities you guys got the food
You got the machine that was making April Fool's Day. That was nonsense. Our water machine yesterday, I tried to get it.
It's just like, hey, here's pineapple butter water.
I'm like, what?
April Fool's Day.
What?
Our bevy is making April Fool's Day?
Yeah, I see.
It pissed me off because it's water.
I needed to live.
Don't you joke around.
It's like if the trees was like, hey, no oxygen today, April fools.
Oops, there's lead in here.
Hold on, how many of us think, too soon, Jess.
How many of us truly believe
if the machine told Chris, we have butter, water,
pineapple, butter, I don't know how I got there.
You came up with that so quickly.
I got caught up in the air, I said pineapple,
and then I realized that's a normal water flavor.
So I got to go somewhere, so I went to pineapple butter.
It's not that the flavor's unimaginable,
is that you would over say, no.
You'd be like, butter water?
Ah!
I'll take it for a walk.
But also, you don't know what kind of day
I'm having machine.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I don't have time for your quirkiness.
You know what I mean?
I just got off a bad meeting.
No one's ever like,
I wish that my water machine told me jokes.
Hold on, y'all wanna hear the worst April Fools
I've ever fallen for in my life,
and it happened yesterday.
And this is the scariest part.
I think I got the oldest kid among anyone in here.
Yeah, so-
Was it Tiger Woods saying he's playing the Masters?
No, this is way worse, bro.
This is way worse.
My kid hands me this sheet and it's a jumble.
I said, dad, can you help me with this?
I can't get any of the words.
And so I look at it and I'm usually good at the jumble,
whatever, and I look, oh, there you go.
One of them is like multiplying or whatever.
Just look for an ING and you got it.
Like, yeah, I can't see, I'm gonna find it.
Then I'm like, yeah, just look for the ING,
it's right there. He's like, can you show me where Like yeah, I can't see it, I'll find it. Then I'm like yeah, just look for the ING, it's right there.
So can you show me where it is?
I said, well, it's somewhere in there.
And I'm looking and I'm like,
I'm trying to buy myself time that I pretended
I knew where it was.
And then my kid was like, it's not on the sheet
because this is an April Fool's joke.
And I was just like, oh no, I've been had.
And I was crushed and I went downstairs, like I can't believe it, I've been had. And I was crushed.
And I went downstairs, like I can't believe it,
I can't believe it, but guess what?
And my kid messed up and said what?
And I said chicken butt.
Got him back.
Got him back.
See I would have thought.
Now I have the upper hand again.
A little harder than that.
I'm not your dad.
Like immediately, you know, raise the stakes.
You know what I mean?
Look I'm riding you. April Fools. Now you got hit with a slow one, hit him with a slow one, gotcha. Like immediately, you know, raise the stakes. You know what I mean? Look at him right in the eye.
April Fool's, now you got hit with a slow one.
Hit him with a slow one, gotcha.
Go ask mommy about the secret we've been keeping from you.
I'm just like picturing the meeting
at the Bevy headquarters.
And they're like, hey guys, I got an idea.
On April Fool's Day, we hit him with a joke.
And they're like, that's good,
that's a good meeting everyone.
What if, what if the Bevy went sentient on us?
I have feelings too, I also can tell jokes,
say what is a butter pecan pineapple?
Pineapple butter pop water.
Actually, I'm thinking we should start a market now
for pineapple butter water.
I'd try it.
No?
Take it outside.
What if it played an April Fool's joke on Dan and was like, here's your orange water.
And Dan was like, no!
That's right, Dan.
I can't have that!
He's allergic to everything.
Orange, steak, garlic.
Pecan water.
I mean, he believes he is.
He gets blood in the alley.
Dan's an unusual character.
But we love Dan.
He would have loved the Gerd interview.
He would have had so many questions
about gastrointestinal distress. Hey,. He would have loved the Gerd interview. He would have asked so many questions
about gastrointestinal distress.
Hey, Mike Ryan tried to ask Kenan Thompson
about Gerd and Kenan Joseph.
Why?
No, in Mike's defense, it was my fault.
Why are you standing?
Why are you standing?
Hand up.
I created the circumstances that put Mike
in a bad situation. I'm not gonna
Yeah, I couldn't get it up to court and so I passed it to Mike to get it up to court
No, but Mike was also looking for a pass and if you didn't pass it, he was just gonna steal it
That's fine. But I mean I I know he was like he's like I'm getting in here with a question
So I landed I landed during the Steve Williams interview.
Woof.
And boy.
Woof.
That was exceptional.
Steve, how many golfers could you beat on tour?
That was the greatest question of the year.
That's the question of the year.
What about with your fists?
On any platform, news, political talk, weather, channel,
like anybody that's been interviewed.
My man just pulled a rip cord like,
by the way, who asked could you whip on a tour?
Golf, this is my favorite part.
It is a tiger.
This man.
Please say tiger.
This man is a graduate of the University of Maryland,
a fine institution, Harvard Business School.
Business, yeah, get that in there.
Was president of like the Players Association
and all the negotiating CBAs in two different sports by the way, which is unheard of.
Like everything on paper, Dominique is like,
wow, this is a Renaissance man.
Put him on a microphone.
He turns into regular football player.
Hey Chris, Chris, this is your time.
Chris, you have a question for the guest?
Oh yeah, I did hear, I did.
Chris, what you got?
Chris, it's your time to talk, right?
So as a former producer, in that moment I did hear, I did hear. Chris, what you got? Chris, it's your time to talk, right? So as a former producer, in that moment,
I was like, oh, he don't know what a talkback button is.
Like, your talkback button is right here.
I had been using it all show.
That's the worst part.
I had been using it all show.
Let me ask, the setup here, do they turn your mics
on and off for you?
No, I can press this all button.
Because I have produced for talent
who would look at the mic on the come in of the segment
and just look at it and be like, you got the mic going
to have to turn itself on, huh?
I'm like, come on, dog.
Help me out here.
That's the worst part is that I knew all of these things.
I have hosted this show many a times quite well.
And the show was going great up until then.
I fell apart.
No excuses.
No excuses.
That was great.
That was fun bad.
John Fanta, do you do brackets?
Do you ask John Fanta, do you do brackets?
What's the worst question that you've asked on this platform?
At this show or in general?
Just keep it here.
At this show.
I know you must got one in your mind, Jason.
100, oh for me?
No, no, no, no.
If you ask it in the questions.
Listen, I have a ton of awful questions that I have asked,
guessed, and you just sit there and you're like,
ooh, this is.
Right, no, I wanna know what yours are,
while I'm buying time for a main or anyone else.
While we buy time, here's one question
that Dan asked the NASCAR driver.
What is the worst part of the life?
That was the end of the question. You wait for the rest of it. That's it. What is the worst part of the life?
Wait now we have to play the whole entire thing with the reply from the person that Dan was
interviewing. Yeah because if you're an interviewee. What is the worst part of the life? Four seconds of silence. The worst part of the life of what?
It was brutal.
That's tough.
That's tough.
I mean, what's yours?
I asked Kenny Satterfield one time,
what was he going to do after basketball
while he was still in college?
And it wasn't like-
It's not that bad.
No, but it is though.
It is, no it is.
Cause when you're talking to a college athlete
and they're thinking, you know, pro somewhere,
I mean, you know, keep you shaking and moving.
And I was like, yeah, kidding.
Barbara College, like, what are we thinking here?
What are we doing here?
In your defense, you were right.
No, no, we're usually right when we ask, you know,
those kinds of awful questions.
Like he was right. He wanted to know who Steven,
he was wanting to say who he beat up before.
I need no defense.
I accept that I blew it.
Like I don't need no defense.
To be fair, it was the first interview on the first day
with someone from a sport that is not in our wheelhouse
that would have maybe also not gone well
even if Dan was here that maybe perhaps needed
I don't know Stu gots to be present for because he is the golf guy that has been absent for a month
No bail needed. I'm a do
But as we know accountability plays I'm gonna do my bid I
Deserve all the ridicule what I'm not gonna do is pretend like I cooked that interview.
I smoked that interview.
The interview was not cooked, it was smoked.
Every other segment, however, I will not lie to you,
been cooking segment after segment.
Bucket, bucket, bucket, bucket, bucket.
Just so you know, distributed.
Give me a new teammate, that's all right,
I get you to ball where you like it,
just like Magic Johnson, it don't matter.
I've been balling ever since then.
However, what I'm not gonna do is pretend
like those interviews were good,
because they were atrocious,
or pretend like it's okay that I point
to some other reason why it sucked.
As a man on a screen, all I had to do
was ask some questions, I blew it.
I wanna go back to the, Chris, what you got right here?
Which is a little improvement over
my favorite interview thing in anywhere sports media entertainment whatever is whenever the
TNT guys are interviewing the player of the game after the game where they are this is
Shaq here I'm like we know like you don't have to announce like I love the idea of like
Shaq asking a question just going right to the question,
and God's like, oh, I'm sorry, who's talking to me?
Is this Ernie?
If we're gonna MMQB the caddy interview,
I think we need to give Chris Cody a pat on the back
for his question about if he caddies elsewhere
other than on the golf course.
It was a great question.
Can I tell you one thing that just popped into my mind?
There's so many terrible portions of that interview
We haven't even talked about the time when I mistakenly pressed the loser game show host button
While my man is in the middle of talking. Are you hit the price is wrong on him? Hit the price is wrong
And then like
Everybody laughed and he explained my bad
I made a mistake whatever and the guy goes back to the,
like you guys had moved on and he goes back to that question.
He hit multiple buttons after that too.
My favorite part of that interview,
the worst part was Tiger,
he said that Tiger had no distractions
and that's why he was the greatest of all time.
And none of us, none of us had the fortitude
to push back on that.
Not one distraction Tiger, not one Perkins.
Shonys, wasn't it Shonys?
Perkins.
It was Perkins, it was Perkins.
I mean, Perkins, Shonys, Binigans, I mean.
Ooh, shout out to the Binigans.
Get you a Monte Cristo, get you right.
I heard Denny's is in trouble.
I heard that too.
It's like one of the next big chains
that's gonna go bankrupt.
I've never eaten a Denny's.
What?
I don't like, I don't. It's the grand heart. I've never eaten a Denny's. What?
I don't like, I don't.
Never eaten a Denny's.
It's not that I don't like it.
I've had a lot of Denny's around Chicago,
because I haven't ever really been at Denny's either.
If they are, they're on the outskirts,
like the Chicagoland area, but I.
Boons over Miami.
That's a sandwich.
Oh, okay, there you go.
All right, cool.
Thanks, Chris.
I'm not a, I'm not a.
That's a funny fact.
A lot of people are nodding along.
It's our food correspondent, Chris Cody.
I like it, I like it.
You know, I do a lot of jokes that are not for everybody.
He's going to defend.
Lay out here.
I'm a fan of Chris Cody and have been for a long time.
You don't have to be surprised about it.
No, no.
No.
So no, I wasn't doing that, Chris.
I was like, hey, I saw Chris.
You'll never believe this.
Didn't think I was going to like him.
I was pretty sure that guy was incompetent.
No. Probably thought he didn't think I was gonna like him. I was pretty sure that guy was incompetent. No, no.
Probably thought he didn't know what he's talking about.
I came to a revelation.
Oh, well you know what?
I'm a big fan.
He's a warm, inviting, big, gentle teddy bear.
You know what I mean?
Look at him.
Yeah, he's a good man.
He's got the backward letters on the hat
so you know he's down with the culture.
There it is.
Get him red.
Check.
You know what hat that is. You might take back your culture. The hockey culture. There it is. Get a wrench. You know what hat that is.
You might take back your culture.
The hockey culture.
There you go.
Oh, yeah.
Panthers.
Yeah.
All right.
Shout out to the hockey, you know?
Blackhawks do that.
Shout out to the hockey.
I think Chris Cody should be my Miami tour guide this year.
Oh.
Chris, you down?
Because last night.
Oh.
Last night with these two dudes.
I gotta get, oh, I will clear the floor for this.
Because this is really why I wanted Jason to come on.
I would love for a minute, but I mean,
you know, I mean, it's not a too cool for school kind
of vibe for me.
Like, we used to be cool.
I used to come on my little NBA radio show on Sirius X
back in the day.
That's how we first linked up when I got to Atlanta.
And ever since then, I wouldn't even say friendship,
but the attachment has grown apart
and he's thrown nothing but barbs my way.
Your career has blown up.
But that doesn't mean I can take these barbs any better.
You know what I mean?
I'm still an insecure individual.
You guys can sort this out in the break.
I need you to get to these stories from last night
because Dumb Stories was cooking.
I would like to-
We ran into Rick Ross's ex-wife. Oh that's right. That's how that's what started.
That started the night. You didn't even mention that. Yeah that kicked off the night.
That was immediately upon us. So she invited us out to karaoke. She sat next to us and as she was
leaving she invited us to do to go do karaoke because apparently she was hosted a karaoke night.
I forgot it was on her instagram. She showed us the Instagram. Somewhere called Overtown.
Oh yeah, Overtown.
That's what you're talking about.
Shout out to Tia though, I want no smoke.
We want no smoke.
No smoke at all.
No one involved in this,
but that's what kicked off the night.
Send Charlie to Liberty City.
Did you go?
No, we didn't go there.
But we had some teachers sit next to us,
so you know, when teachers get out of town, you know how the vibes get, you know what I mean? The teachers had some teachers sit next to us. So, you know, when teachers get out of town,
you know how the vibes get, you know what I mean?
The teachers little conventions sit next to us.
I got accosted by my favorite people, the old black men.
It was all old black men.
Everywhere we go, they like, hey, hey brother,
thank you for what you're doing.
I like what you're doing, brother.
Did they hit you with this?
Keep representing us.
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
It's implied.
What a burden.
Oh, the unnatural pressure of being black
in front of old black men.
Like, you think white people put pressure on you?
An old black man look at you like, hey now,
I know you're not slipping up the way you,
you know, the mothers are slipping up.
Like, I didn't even know what I was doing, sir.
I'm getting a soda right now.
Whenever they tell me that,
the first thing my brain goes to is like, the dumbest things I've done for this show. Oh yeah. Like, damn, I hope they didn soda right now. Whenever they tell me that, the first thing my brain goes to is like the dumbest things I've done for this show.
Oh, yeah.
Like, damn, I hope they didn't see that.
You'll get your sellout award at the Black News.
You're just like, damn, I've disappointed
so many old black men today.
On a daily basis, my dad.
You know what I mean?
Wow, I once lost a grid of death punishment
where I had to do a whole show handcuffed.
So I showed up. I showed up dressed like Martin Luther King
with the numbers.
The numbers and I did the whole show like that.
And then we would put you on a flyer.
See you know what I'm talking about.
Yeah, we were talking, we introduced Charlie
to Martin Luther King Day club flyers.
He was unaware of that.
And I was like, yeah, you gotta.
Chris, you know about this? Yeah, yeah, I do, he was unaware of that. And I was like, yeah, you gotta. You know about this?
Yeah, yeah, I do, but tell Billy.
Okay.
The cultural exchange is happening right now.
So like when there's like, you know,
Martin Luther King Day is a holiday,
so on Sunday, there's a big party at a club
or a day party at a brunch or whatever.
They'll do the flyer, but on the flyer,
it'll be a picture of Martin Luther King, typically in modern garb.
So I do rag on have it changed.
They'll give him a grill, something like that,
and then they'll put like a shaking ass,
a car over there.
Like it's called community performance.
Yeah, there we go.
Shaking ass.
I mean, that's what it is.
The flyer's got a motion, like a reflection. Like a hologram. Aaking ass. I mean, that's what it is. The fire's got a motion, like a reflector card.
It's like a hologram.
A hologram.
So you just got to twist it.
So this is the same Puritan earlier in the show.
Puritan?
Yes.
How about Puritan?
When did I present myself as a Puritan?
When I said Slumpbuster and you grabbed your pearls.
Oh my god.
That's not the show we do here.
Shaking ass comes out the next hour, though.
Calm down. Shout out to the MLK estate. We needed one more black guy here. That's what we're doing do here. Shake it ass comes out the next hour though. Um, shout out to the MLK estate.
We needed one more black guy here.
I'm going, I'm forcing us to do this.
So Charlie, Charlie,
please stop me if I ever say anything
that would get you and your friends in trouble.
But we met his friend
last night who's a lawyer
and his name is...
He's a great guy. Oh yeah, he's a great guy.
What did he do? It's a great start. Oh yeah, he's a great guy. What did he do?
It's a great start.
He didn't do anything.
That's set up.
It's a great start, right?
No, there was a lot of stories last night.
Some of them could make it to the air,
and some of them can't.
But his friend's name is Buddy Barnwarmer.
Warper.
Buddy Bardenwarper.
Bardenwarper.
Bardenwarper.
He's a creative player on 2K.
I think the prom story, I think we can get clearance for the prom story.
I think we can get clearance for the squatter story.
Oh, squatter story.
That was on the line.
There are two squatter stories.
On the line.
All right, if we leave names out, can we tell the squatter story?
Sure.
Okay, so Buddy was the, in the summer, Buddy, they all went to the same school together,
private school, all boys school in DC.
So Buddy was the janitor during the summer.
He would make some money.
He's a stand up guy, stand up guy.
Buddy also was a military man before he became a lawyer.
Thank you for your service.
Before he became a lawyer.
But in the summer he would make money by cleaning the school.
And they had a teammate on their football team
who got the nickname the mad squatter.
That's right.
Okay.
Because this young man would go into the section
of the school that he knew Buddy was responsible
for cleaning and he would squat.
Come on now.
Shit on the floor.
Do his business.
In the middle of the thing? Mm-hmm. Yup. Locker room floor. Not now.. Shit on the floor. Do his business. In the middle of the thing?
Yep.
Locker room floor.
Just shit on the floor.
Just a nervous individual.
Now I get why you were like, he's a good guy.
Yeah, and Buddy, he would do it routinely.
Like it was a regular thing, intentionally laughing at it.
And then Buddy just clean it up.
Just going about his business, clean it up.
Buddy's a...
It's crazy. It's the soul of a good white man. Because I business, clean it up. Buddy's a... It's crazy.
It's the soul of a good white man.
Because I gotta tell you right now,
I would have called the police.
Buddy's white?
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And the squatter was not.
The squatter was not.
Buddy played college football also,
and we happen to have a similar,
or we have a connection to a strength coach.
And Buddy told a story of his strength coach,
whom I also know.
He said the strength coach
did, got really hype on test day.
I don't know if you guys know test day.
Everyone does.
Yeah, it's the day when you test.
Get your max,
you try to get your max number on the squad or the bench.
That's what I thought it was too.
It's just huge.
So, on test day, the strength coach is trying to get everybody hype. So he proceeds to rip
his shirt open, get under the squat rack, do four squats.
With the Texas belt buckle.
Yes, with the Texas belt buckle. Get under a 450 pound squat rack, do four, rack it,
scream at everyone, take it back off the rack immediately,
do five more, then collapse to the ground convulsing.
This is how we kick it off, the test day.
This is the energy that he wants.
Hey buddy.
Seizures.
Harvard football.
Ivy League school, guys.
Ivy League school.
This wasn't even like Michigan State. This is the strip coach at the Ivy League school, guys. What the? Ivy League school. This wasn't even like Michigan State.
This is a strength coach at an Ivy League school.
He like, hey, I gotta.
You're preparing accountants for life
by dying in front of them on a squat rack.
Shout out to strength coaches out there.
Strength coaches are wild dudes.
The last story that I've gotten approval to tell
is the prom story. I took his approval to tell is the prom story.
Oh, Lord.
I took his prom date, so he married mine.
And not only married, but gave her a beautiful family.
The idea that I have in my mind is
Buddy was mad that Charlie took his prom date.
I didn't even realize he was mad.
And then Buddy was like, you know what?
You took my prom date.
I'ma marry your prom date date and I'ma be a great
husband and a great father to the children I'm gonna dedicate my life to
avenging the prom date stealing bastard you are and I think one of his kids
name is Charlie yeah yeah yeah I wish yeah weather is starting to warm up
regular season starting to wind down. Games of consequence
in sports starting to ramp up. I know what you're going to need by your side. It's by my side
already. Miller Lite. Yeah that's right. I'm making my spring time a Miller time. I'm making my sports
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chill in the backyard with
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