The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: The Jerk Off (feat. David Samson and Darren Rovell)

Episode Date: February 20, 2025

Greg Cote is mad about notifications on his phone and the fact that strangers can just request money from him on Venmo. Carson Beck and Hanna Cavinder both got their cars stolen and while Cavinder's car has been returned, Beck's MERCEDES AND LAMBORGHINI are still missing. Plus, Chris informs us he has to miss out on the United States against Canada in the Four Nations Face-Off tonight because of a comedy show. Has anybody had a bigger star turn this year than Nikki Glazer? Then, we’ve flown in Darren Rovell to for a sports business “jerk off” with David Samson after Samson claimed he was not only more recognizable but also more qualified to discuss sports business. Who has the bonafides? What sports memorabilia will Rovell inexplicably have with him? Who will become the victor? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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This is the Dan LeBattor Show with the Stugats Podcast. This episode of the Dan LeBattor Show with Stu Gotz is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours. Boom. I have a number of things that I have to get to, including Greg Cody just enraged by something that just happened on his phone. And it's not what Stu Gotz was saying that Greg Cody was complaining about. This part is lower on the list.

Stu Gotz was just saying that Greg Cody is being enraged by just his phone giving him notifications. Like he doesn't want any more notifications from his phone. He wants his phone to stop notifying him. But he is mad because something happened with the Venmo fine bucket that he was not expecting. And we'll get to that in a second. Before we do that, however, and before we get to Chris Cody and find out how much juice he has squeezed because it doesn't seem like he's made very much juice back there,

I am going to read a story right now that I could not have imagined. I'm gonna say even four years ago as something that is just simply normal now around college sports. Okay? This is what I'm about to read to you. Andy Slater here locally does an exceptional job of reporting local news and apparently Miami quarterback Carson Beck and Hannah Cavender had three, the basketball star, one of the Cavender

sisters, they had three vehicles stolen overnight the basketball star one of the cavender sisters they had uh... three vehicles stolen overnight in south florida according to andy slater and this is the sentence that really gets me it's just a great sentence cavenders f u as you've he was found but becks mercedes and lamborghini remain missing. It used to be that you could get a quarterback

with one car. It would cost one good car and then everybody would be outraged and we'd be offering, you know, Eric Dickerson an oil well to go to SMU. But it's never, I've never seen it before be a Mercedes and a Lamborghini for the cost of a college quarterback. Don't look now at Stugata's never, I've never seen it before be a Mercedes and a Lamborghini for the cost of a college quarterback.

Don't look now at Stugatsa's garage, okay? Because there might be a Mercedes and a Lambo in there. But also, while you're on the topic of Miami women's basketball, they're hosting the number one Notre Dame Fighting Irish tonight at the Watsco Center. I will be there. Nice.

But don't look now. All right. I have been venmo-fined by Stugats because I was calling it Don't Look Up, the previous segment different thing It's a difficult game. It's hard to understand and I ruined it. Did you pay the fine? I have not yet paid the fine, but it is why I was talking to Greg Cody about the Venmo fine bucket

I will pay the fine right now, but Greg. Why are you mad at the Venbo at the Venmo fine bucket? What are you mad about? Okay? I'm new to Venmo and I absolutely love the app. It makes paying anyone super convenient. But being new to Venmo, I was shocked that one of the aspects of Venmo is that complete strangers can ask you for money. And so I get this Venmo request for 20 bucks from a guy who I don't know who says book fan. That's a heady play. As if he just read, you know, the Pride of a Lion book

or perhaps the Back in My Day book. Right. Either of my two recent books. But I didn't know that was a thing. That somebody could just say, hey, what am I, a GoFundMe page all of a sudden? Greg, the flip side of that. Do I look like an ATM machine?

People can just give you money money like sometimes people just give me money and also like thanks for putting up with david samson and they'll give me like ten bucks while a t m machine is redundant i learned that a few years ago at levi rager right but did you know that a t m machine uh... was redundant i have just paid the dollar fine up but you were a lot angrier before then you were just then you were pissed off and you were dot

uh... it's i greg cody did not want what he thinks of as a panhandler interrupting his then mo secret space he felt invaded he felt violated he the request now he can ignore the request of course he can but he felt a violation in the request even being

allowed to be made it surprised me I was not warned of it and now that I know about it I don't object to it because I can just not pay it if I want but we're objecting to it. Request him back, like get him back. Yes. Actually, you pay me. You pay me to do that. You should do that. I'm going to do that. I entertain you so much with my books, you pay me more.

I'm going to ask him for $21. What do you think of that? Would it be proper to call it an AT machine? Yes. Yes. Absolutely. Yes. Chris, what are you eating now, over the course?

You are eating to celebrate Canada-US time. This is a giant game, correct? Yeah, baby. It's the biggest game that I can remember in hockey outside of the final game that we had a couple months ago. But no, I'm eating poutine, Dan. What? I'm eating poutine. What do you mean? It's just good.

It is. I know the first couple, I was doing a thing. It is, it's so good. I realized that with this bit today, you can just order food, and I'm like, all right, so let me get some pancakes. They know what they're doing with fries. Let me get some bacon, and then I'm like, you know, what can I get some pancakes. They know what they're doing with fries. Let me get some bacon. And then I'm like, you know,

how can I do for the third thing? You know what? Just give me some poutine. Give me the real stuff. That defeats what you were trying to be. Yeah, but it's good. Red, white, and blue, man. What happened? It's a heart attack on a fork.

It's perfection. The gravy, the cheese curd, the fries, my God. My God, pal. But you were trying to be on behalf of America you were eating pancakes Well, that was earlier maple syrup on this is just delicious. Yeah, so this is this one. I don't have anything really for you So but your allegiance is just like Poutine So your your allegiance is to your country to your team to your sport they stop here. Okay? team to your sport. They stop here. Okay. Stop with gravy. Oh my god. Fried cheese. Want a bite? No, I'm good buddy. Put it on the poll at LeBataard show. Do you love poutine?

Hell yeah. Is that something that everybody loves? Is that universally, do you make that Greg? Like I don't, is this the food that you most associate with Canada above all others? I have eaten it in my life on a trip to Montreal at a meat place called Ben's. It's super caloric, super rich. Thank you, you are saying good words. You eat three spoonfuls of it and you're like full. It's too much for me. Yeah, it combines like three or four gravy and cheese. Did you guys answer my question about whether this is the food that Canada is associated with above all other foods? I don't associate Canada with food. It's a

national dish of Canada. I go syrup one. It's always syrup. You guys, I don't associate Canada with good cuisine. London famously has that food. Canada has great food. Amazing food. Toronto is a great food city. Yes. But I'm with Dan. You don't like, I don't associate. I don't think food when I think, when I think Canada. I think hockey. I mean. And so tonight we have a giant game that is an exhibition and Roy and Chris Cody are going to be how patriotic about wrapping themselves in the flag and hoping that the Kachaks kick the whole, kick the poutine out of those crybabies from Canada.

And don't get hurt. I'm gonna be super patriotic. Burp the shit out of them. I'm gonna be super patriotic from the Nikki Glaser show. It sucks. You're not even watching it? The timing of this, like I tried to get out of it, my wife bought Nikki Glaser tickets months ago, and I'm just like, I couldn't wanna go less

because I wanna watch this game and I tried already. You ever do that thing where you put a little feeler out for getting out of something and you just feel the temperature? Yes. And you're like, okay. It's usually very hot. This is not something I'm getting out of,

so I'm just gonna have to eat it. And this is a comedy show. If it was a concert, I could just watch it on my phone the whole time. These comedy shows, they don't like your phones out, so now I am literally shit out of life. I hope she does crowd work and roasts you. I mean, and I think our seats are good, so it's not like I can hide in the back.

It's just, I'm very disappointed. Is there anybody who has had a bigger star turn in comedy over the last year than Nikki Glaser? Because she's been grinding for a long time, so for her, and everyone respects how great she is, but what she has done on these award shows, the roast and the way she's killed it with, I'm told like 40 writers because of the size

of the opportunities that she has crushed, difficult opportunities. Has anybody in comedy had a better, Shane Gillis I guess has had a better year than? Hinchcliffe, just in terms of being known, it might be for not the best reasons, but Hinchcliffe has gotten big really quick. But didn't he come with a bit of polarization,

even in the world of comedy, that makes it so he's less universally applauded than Nikki Glaser? I mean, I think that's putting it lightly. Yes, no, it's... They're also different kinds of comedians, right? Like, Tony's not a stand-up guy as you would say Nikki would be.

No, he's a roaster, but she's... He's more of a roaster, like I'm a Tom. Look, they both killed the first roast, nicky glazer parlayed it into an award show and henchcliffe reporter you know uh... he parlayed it into the rnc and and all of the controversy that that came with he has done this more uh... he has done this less artfully than she has like graduated from the rose to whatever it is to be respected by all the other comedians because they like while. Universally the two things that she's done, she's crushed by the consensus

of every comedian watching. I saw Nikki Glaser at the Miami Improv like eight years ago so she has been going at this a long time. I wanted to ask you guys something that we didn't cover today and I'm just curious if times have changed in a way that I'm not totally understanding because a moment went viral here where Malik Beasley of the Detroit Pistons was just finishing doing a streaming hit with Neon who's got his own set of issues and this at the end is what happened and people are reacting to it as it's as if it's both uh... funny

but also gotcha when i thought we were passed the gotcha on marijuana and the nba let's watch this was y'all the end it's part that **** up, I'm ready to go high now. So he just wanted to spark up and didn't know he was still on camera and why is that? I thought everyone understood that Kevin Durant is scoring 30 a game in a cloud of marijuana smoke, smoking marijuana during timeout uddles. There's one thing, it's one thing to know it, Dan.

It's another thing, and it's totally separate to actually see it. People don't wanna be seen smoking pot. They don't care if you know it, they just don't want you to see them do it. Maybe this is just, maybe I'm showing myself here, but this is just, let's go get a beer. Like, isn't that, like, this is no different than,

hey, let's go get a drink after work. Like, what are we doing here? This is a nothing story. Yeah, hasn't it been pretty much decriminalized across the country? Oh, but I think there's plenty of moralizing about look I think I don't think you Chris and Mike know how you sound to a certain segment of audience that hears you just doing Drugs all the time and it's like that's not right to be just doing gummies all the time certain segment of audience is gonna find That immoral whether it's been decriminalized or not That you're just constantly baked. It's not legal here

not before work I Have no proof No proof whatsoever that many people presently on television aren't high on gummies when mad dogs allowed to tell you aren't high on gummies when Mad Dog's allowed to tell you how much gummy consumption he's doing while betting $10,000 a game and being close to 70 years old. Yeah, but he earned it, Dan. Somebody earned it, his Mad Dog. Do whatever you want.

Do you not suspect that some of the media members that you're presently watching on television and radio are presently high? I'm looking at him right now, actually. Hey! Darren Revelle and David Sampson are gonna have a business off. Nerd off!

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to save $175 on your order. redwoodoutdoors.com, code Dan. Dan LeBretard. Oh, I like firing people. So I take the opportunity to fire whenever I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to help them out and try to point out

what they did wrong. But in this case, the employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing, but I had it done within moments of discovery. I like firing people. It's just absurd. It's absurd. Stugats.

I'm talking about people who I fire who deserve it, who have done something that actively requires me to fire them. It is my unadulterated pleasure to do so. This is the Don LeBattar Show with the Stugats. David Sampson is here. He's the host of Nothing Personal. He has made people a little bit upset because he's brash and he will tell you how good he is at things. So when we were talking sports business the other day, he said he was the most famous and credible of the sports business insiders. And he also said he's just more generally famous than Darren Revelle. Correct? Those are both claims. Look at him. David Samson is laughing right now, but he did say both of those things. He said both of those things right after he put himself into the Marlins Hall of Fame.

Either before or after. But yes, it was a very self-involved. Simultaneous. Okay, all right, so just so that we're clear, what is your contention here, before we test some of this stuff, because we here at Metal Arch Media have spent a great deal of money flying Darren Revelle in first class

to do a business off with you, and we're gonna have some sort of competition in moments as soon as it is that we get him here from the airport. But what is the nature of your disagreement? That's just so spot on that you would actually allocate resources to prove something that is so obvious. You remember you're stuck with people surrounding you who have this view of me that's based on a trade that's based on one thing that happened so many years

ago that people can't remember. You got Billy upset and Mike, I've ruined his life. Let me tell you something. At the end of the day, the majority of people don't care about that. And Darren Revelle is funny, sort of. And whether or not he has, I think Stu told me 1.9 million Twitter followers. Let me tell you something. How many of those are in the United States of America?

Let's start with what does that mean? What? What does that mean? What difference? I'm sorry. You're right. Nobody buys followers. I'm wrong. You're totally right.

Wow. Everyone's Twitter following. All right. Look, there is our Darren Revelle. Cam. All right. Wow. Wow. Everyone's Twitter following him. Wow. All right, look, look, there is our Darren Ravel cam. All right, he is outside. He is, let him in right now. Look at him, he's enraged. Oh my God.

Curious. We've got, he is funny, sort of, says, oh my God, he's coming in aggressive. Yeah. Ravel. That is Darren in the studio. Yes, it's him. There is nothing that hurts me more

than to say I bought followers. You're taking away all my work. Darren, is that you? Yes, it's not an avatar. It's not AI. It's me. Well, it's hard to know what's you and what's not you and your social media presence. Is that a joke about my age? No, we're the same age.

We're the same demographic. I don't participate in triathlons. So I might not be as good shape as you. And I'm very sorry that you had to be flown in for this. It's so funny. And I assume that it was coach, even though Dan said first class. That would know it was first class. I was in one.

Yeah. Yeah. Why are you accusing him of being funny sort of and buying followers? Why are you doing that? We're welcoming him in to have a business off with you and you're you're greeting him by way of insult. By the way, what's behind you? That hotel is it. Do you think that's a collectible? Do you think that's something that has value?

What is that hotel? The motel behind you, David? Yeah, that was a Hanukkah present for my daughter, Kira, from Amazon, because I love Schitt's Creek. So, no, there is no value to that. Good show. My personal attachment to it and me trying to be a better father by putting it on set. Are you going to attack my fatherhood next? I'm not impugning anything other than you're not as well recognized as I am.

If you put our faces next to each other and said who's who, people would be able to identify me and not you. Why don't we post that? Where should we post that to let the world decide? It seems like we should let the world decide. Where does that go? It won't go on my Twitter feed because it'll accuse me of being biased,

but where should that go? Is that on the LeBotard page? A vote on who it is that's more credible, more. You're on Lebatard every day. And I'll take that advantage that more people will know me unless it's rigged. And, you know, I don't know how we'll figure that out. But if you do that, I think we can we can actually find someone independent, someone Sue Gotts could identify people in his circle, in his life, who are independent.

I don't think Stu Gotts in independence has ever been in the same sentence, I'm sorry. I wish it would. I should say that he's an Emmy winning sports business analyst. He's worked for ESPN, CNBC, and the Action Network, and he's now the founder of Collect Media. Darren Revelle, what are you smiling about, Stu?

I'm just laughing at Darren. I'm waiting for something funny to come out of his mouth. Okay, well he's funny sort of according to David Sampson. But Darren, how would you put your credentials up against David's? And David, why are you saying that you are more credible and more famous than Darren Revelle? Well, the credible part is just because

there's not many voices out in the atmosphere that have the business experience that I've had, and I'm willing to talk about it in an honest way. That's what nothing personal is. That's what my time is with you on the show. I don't know that there's a peer that can do it only because they haven't actually done it. In terms of being recognized, I think Survivor plays a part in that.

I think the Marlins play a part. You play a part in that, Dan, obviously, and Stu gots. So I think all in when you forget the 1.9 million Twitter followers, which I'm happy to talk about at any time, Darren, how that number happens and the work you did to get that because obviously we do it wrong at the Levitard show. But that said, I think it's pretty much unanimous that no one would recognize Darren for being a business person other. He's a reporter who did well

and now is the founder of a company that I have great respect for, but it's not like being the founder of MetalArk. You're putting me in a tough position here. Listen, I respect everything you do. I respect you as the longtime Marlins president. I actually do love your show and do listen to it. But there is no way that you are more recognized than me.

I don't know why you're talking in that voice. Well, it's helping. It is helping. I'm trying to stay calm. You put him in a tough spot, Dan. I did put him. Well, David S helping. It is helping. I'm trying to stay calm. You put him in a tough spot, Dan. I did put him, David Sampson put him in a tough spot. I didn't put him in a tough spot. We flew him in, I guess I put him in a tough spot.

You did, yeah. Is this a business off? Is it a respect off? It's a jerk off. Yeah. Whoa. There's a lot of things this is, and that's not one of them.

You're both being jerks to each other. It's a jerk off. and that's not one of them. You're both being jerks to each other. It's a jerk. It is a jerk off. Yeah. That was not part of the contract with the airline. That's not what we were gonna call. We're gonna do a memorabilia off in a second because they're both they're both collectors. No what was lame when they was when they did the respect off five minutes ago. That was lame. No one wants to hear how much you guys respect each other. It's true. It's true. It's the worst part of the segment. David's defense, Darren did walk in and he said, hey, I'm Darren Revelle. I mean, David

wouldn't have to say that around here. And Stu Gott said, I know who you are. Right. Yes. Well, I did say that. And does anyone side with David Sampson on this? I thought the rest of us were in agreement that Darren Revelle is indeed more famous and more famous as a business credible person in sports than David is. It doesn't mean that he's actually more credible,

but he's got the reputation that's more pervasive. I thought we all agreed on that. We did. Yeah, we all agree. Boy, Dan, you really got the room cooking on that. We did. Yeah, we all agree. Boy, Dan, you really got the room cooking on that one. Dan, you're putting us in a really tough position. Yeah, really tough spot here. Darren's here.

It's gonna be tough for us. The problem is we sort of all work for David now, so no one wants to say what they're thinking. I mean, he's negotiating against me. It's really unclear his role, so we have to be careful with what we say. I'm pretty sure he runs my life now. Listen, nothing personal.

Oh. I would like to give everyone free rein, and I will say to everyone that any thought I have toward each of you is not in any way correlated to how you answer the question, but you're in the media world, you're in the sports media world. Are you telling me that when it comes to sports business,

you would rather hear what, now forget personalities, forget your view of me outside of it, but you'd rather hear what Darren Ravel has to say about a sports business topic versus what I have to say about it. That's not true of me, obviously, Metal Arch is paying you to do it. And so we value that.

We can't afford Ravel. And... of me obviously metal arc is paying you to do it and so we vow we value that Ford Revelle and that's not exactly accurate really but but good one for him name your price oh I just think that Aaron's rate is way lower than my rate whoa wow interesting hmm how in our Boston what is the accusation of bought than my rate. Whoa. Wow. Interesting. How? So is Darren our boss now? What is the accusation of bot followers? Is there gonna be a personnel change here? It seems like, yeah. I would much rather negotiate with you Darren, I gotta be honest.

The audience should know that Darren Revelle has been doing this for a very long time. How long have you been doing it? I started ESPN when I was 21 in June of 2000. With the largest aspiration being, what's that going to look like at the very height of my greatest success? Yeah, I mean it was hard when I started there and I was like, wow, I'm here already. But yeah, I mean I spent 13 years at ESPN and then

went to CNBC, which was like being going from like, the nerd at the business, the nerd at the sports network to the cool guy at the business network. And, you know, but I love sports business. I've loved how it's evolved. I've loved how I've, you know, how David's been involved in this, how you talk to team presidents and CEOs. And's and you know people used to mid-day and if you think about the the old ages of radio station with people used to call up

and didn't know anything about anything because they didn't know about their owners capacity to spender they'd be just weren't smart they didn't sound smart and i think the fan wants to be smarter now so that is helped the development of sports business you view yourself as a pioneer in this particular genre right that you you you analyzed money so that david samson could sore and into the sky and still have his position but i would say that yes from a net i was the first ever

national sports business reporter before there were concrete beat people something was going up in Miami they'd have they take the guy who's in the community or the political and move them over to sports for a second you know but there wasn't anyone nationally covering it in terms of things though that you take pride in he can uns he can insult you no greater than saying that your Twitter followers are bought right because one of the things that I have found you to be most publicly proud of is how hard you worked to establish that particular following.

I mean, listen, in the beginning, it was very tough on Twitter. When I was at CNBC, they would say, hey, we pay you. We don't want you to break news on that. And everyone would say, oh, no one wants to know what someone's eating for lunch. And so in the beginning, there was a lot of dismissing. And a lot of that was by 2010,

I was probably maybe the first or second journalist on Twitter, by 2010, Twitter had recommendations on who to follow. So if you clicked sports, I was in the top 25. And that led to the growth that it did. But I have never bought a follower, and I have never not tweeted something out of my account. All 250,000 tweets have been pushed by me.

All right. Is it fair to say you blazed a path? There is no David Sampson if not for Darren Rappell. No, no, no, because the team's, I'm not- That's absurd. The team side would always exist. Hey, hey, my show, my questions, thank you. No, the team side would always exist, but maybe there would not be interest in nothing personal the saint And I have nothing personal on this but there'd be not the same amount of interest in nothing personal if it wasn't for me

So thank you David. Thank you. No. Thank you to Darren. What's the face you're making David? You have to understand what he's saying he at in June of 2000 at ESPN is a 21 year old and I don't Disrespect the age but what you are doing is reporting on news. What I'm doing is making news Oh, that's a and that's a ball and that's a big difference And what I do now is talk about the news that I made. You are telling your experiences. I am telling the experiences of 250 presidents. So knowing that, I would say, just because you have personal lived experiences,

doesn't mean that I don't have credibility having talked to more people about the job in the same job that you have. But they're telling you what they want you to hear, what they want you to know. Well, only if I'm not a real reporter. If I'm a real reporter, I know things and I learn things. I don't just report what people tell me.

I am knowing what else is going on behind the scenes. That's what a reporter does. A reporter doesn't just turn on the microphone and then transcribe it. I'm actually learning what's happening behind the scenes. So when LeBron is about to sign with Reebok and someone's telling me he's gonna sign with Reebok, I have to figure out he's gonna sign with Nike

and I can't report the Reebok part. So I think you're taking away the complexities of reporting. No, and no, I'm not actually. It's a hugely important job and we're learning that now in today's world where certain, where there is a rush toward bad reporting. Do you want it to be called the Gulf of Samson? Sorry.

No. A Gulf of America joke. Jessica, what do you have there? I was just going to say, can we put on the poll, can you say that was a bar when you're in the middle of a jerk off between Ravel and David Sampson? Is that something you can say? I would vote no on that. That's a bar.

I mean, the argument is kind of like Antonio Brown is more credible than Ernie Johnson because he played the game. That's a great example. That's a great analogy. He played the game. That's a great example. That's a great analogy. He played the game. He saw it with his own eyes and, and you know, and no coach would ever be more credible than a player. Jeff Passon is a great example of someone who has the view that he's run a team. Scott Boris has the same view and they report, they get scoops.

Jeff Passon breaks news all the time. He's the breaking news guy. That means he's got connections. It means he's got people who talked to him, who give him information, whether it's from the Union or the League, and the information is given purposefully, mostly, sometimes due to relationships. But at the end of the day, that doesn't give him any credibility as to why the decision was made or what's really going on. You're totally taking what you need to spend a couple days

at a journalism school. You're totally taking, now, Passon and Schefter, and not to rail on them, but the guys who are breaking news and breaking to Twitter, and normally they're right. But the idea of that there's no analysis, that there's no reporting, that there's no reporting, that there's nothing behind the scenes that happens other than what people tell me,

that's not a respect for journalism. I'm not impugning you as a journalist. No, you're impugning journalism overall. No, that's absolutely wrong. I'm merely telling you that I'm not a journalist. The question was not, Dan, you may have set this up. I am much more credible than you having talked to. Credible with what, Darren?

Information, information. I am more credible with information. Yes. Okay, so what are you arguing in terms of credibility? The ability to analyze and teach and educate things that are going on in the world of sports business. So over time, you're basically saying I have learned nothing about business

as I've reported on it. I didn't say that at all. Yes you did because you said I'm just a journalist. You and I started, we're different ages, we've been in the business world a different amount of time. You are very good at what you do. Again, not the question.

We were brought here today, you were flown in, which blows my mind given meetings I've been having, but let's just pretend that it was a smart move. But the question was- It was cheaper. It was at 6 a.m. from Newark. So those, the early flights are the cheaper one. Connected.

I was at the airport at 4.53. It was direct. You don't even need to be there 67 minutes in advance if you have clear and you're not checking it back But I have yet to miss a flight and that's a record that I don't want to miss in your whole life in my whole life I haven't either so impressive We're finding some common ground finally I

Would imagine I can't imagine the type of person who would miss a flight except if I were to imagine one it would be damn Yep. Yeah, I thought this was a memorabilia off. Yeah, we're gonna do it in a second. That's the final stage. So right now Sampson is winning slightly, I think. He is? But we still have the memorabilia stage. And it's not a respect off, it's not a memorabilia off,

it's not a credibility off. It's an off. Jerk off. It is a jerk off. We need a logo for that. Can we get up? No. Yeah, no. Lewis, get on it.

That is a really dreadful idea from everybody involved. Let's do what it is that you've brought us here today. And David is a very proud collector of a number of different things. Without knowing what Ravel's collection is, David, surely you wouldn't hypothesize that your collection is better than his, would you? No, I would not.

I would suggest that I have a collection that my kids won't throw away when I croak, but I do not have the type of things that Darren has. Okay, that's slightly disappointing. I was hoping for him to say he did, so that I could accuse him of having Loria art. All right, let's see what it is that David has there that he can show us that is a memorabilia collectible item

that you're proud of. It's not where my memorabilia is. That should be where some of your memorabilia is. But what is the thing that you have that you were proudest of, David? Show them the UPS box, David. It's not where I am right now. It's a FedEx box, David.

You have to correct me. What is it, from Cast X box David. You have to what is it? What is it from cast away? Yes. Yes. And David, you can't let Billy do that. Do what I'm helping. I'm the only one offering help here. UPS box is what he said. Yes. He's got the FedEx box from cast away. He does. He does have it. Yes. Okay. There's there's multiple. But but that's a pretty good one. Multiple. Bowie's glasses, I think. Yeah.

No, not Bowie. Darren, I also have from Castaway the pocket watch with Helen. That's that's great. I keep getting Wilson. Volleyballs are in the hundred to two hundred thousand dollar range. There's many of them, but that's a tough one. If you have. I don't have an actual Wilson volleyball.

I instead went with those things from cast away. I've got a bunch of sports memorabilia that I enjoy that I have never marked to market. It doesn't matter to me at this moment. And I would say the most important piece of memorabilia I have is the jersey from the last win that Jose Fernandez had in his life. Oh, that's cool.

That's cool. The game worn jersey that was Fernandez had in his life. The Game Ward jersey that was never washed. That's right. That is just. A little darkness and death right at the end. Don't you have Martin Luther King rookie cards or something? No, no, that's just, I have a lot of Martin Luther King stuff,

but people don't like that because I'm a white man collecting it. It's big money. Well, Darren, to be fair, what you tend to do on Martin Luther King Day is you tend to post the memorabilia that you have on Martin Luther King. I do, I do.

And there should be nothing wrong with that. Just seems like an unusual flex on Martin Luther King Day. Can he respect him or not, David? Well, I would think that Martin Luther King would want me to flex him on Martin Luther King Day. I mean, it's a day for him. No, I think he'd want you to flex him on every other day. You have 364 days.

Let's not get lost in the weeds on this one. I brought some things to flex him on every other day. You have 364 days. Let's not get lost in the weeds on this one. I brought some things to flex. What do you have? What do you have? Oh, is that a pill box? That is a pill box. It's not a pill box. What is that?

It's, well, look at it. He's handing it to you. I'm handing it to you. Read it, read the name on it. It's a pill bottle that he's been handed. It's a bottle. All right, wow. It is Hugh Hefner, take one tablet one hour prior to sex

may increase to two tablets daily maximum. That is Viagra. That is from the collection of Crystal Hefner. I bought it from her estate. Wow. Did you take one before the jerk off? No, no, no, no. No.

That's pretty good though. Hey, I'm only 46, so. Would it be worth more or less if it had an actual pill in it versus being empty? I was actually thinking about putting blue jelly bellies in there, but I don't think. David, what have you got in there? Aaron, what is the value of that?

So you wanna guess how much I paid for it? $5,500. I paid $8,000. Wow, who said 20? And what's it worth? What do you imagine it's worth? I think I could probably sell it for 25 grand. Would you?

I think I've actually had it long enough so if there's a listener who wants to offer me 25 grand, I'll sell it. So how often do you choose poorly there where instead of three times the return, you get crushed on the return because you've made a bad of- Usually never. Never. See see that's ridiculous Darren now you want to tell you want me to tell you

why why because I know things that other people don't know so let's talk about let's let's get going here all right so I knew I knew that in that bottom right corner or however you're looking at it, I knew that that was the best George Washington signature in the world. What? Okay? It was from 1799. And the best George Washington sig, this cost me $23,000, okay?

Now, the worst George Washington's 9,000, the best is 23. When the card people and the movie people get into collecting historical autographs, and in 2026 is the big year, the 250th anniversary of America, that widening is gonna happen like it happens in cards. PSA 1 Jordan rookie, 1500.

PSA 10, 180,000. So this will be worth over $100,000 in the next four years. So I'm predicting markets. It's an arbitrage game. So this will be worth over $100,000 in the next four years. So I'm predicting markets. It's an arbitrage game. When I'm doing memorabilia, it's fish in a barrel. I know something that you don't. So I know that, hold on.

How does that get graded a nine with all the cracks in the middle of it there? So impressive. The auto is a nine. I wouldn't say the envelope is a nine. All right, so this is an example right here. So this is a Jimi Hendrix ticket. Clark University in 1968.

I went there. He went to Clark University. PMOC, Clark University, Worcester, Mass. Not when Jimi Hendrix was there. In Worcester. Okay, ready for this? So I happen to know when this goes up. This is the first time that Jimi Hendrix played the national anthem

that was famous a year later in Woodstock. I buy this for $600. I then get PSA to grade it, and it says on the flip, it now says, debut of the national anthem. Now it's $15,000. That's why I don't lose, because I know something that- He doesn't lose,,000. That's why I don't lose, because I know something that-

He doesn't lose, Dan. You don't. I don't lose. One more. There is no collector in the world who ever says what Darren is saying. There's no collector of art, collector of books, collector of memorabilia,

collector of stocks, purchaser of stocks. But David, that's why he's the best. Overall, so there are things. So I went into the VHS category. I thought that VHSs, sealed VHSs would be something big and they weren't. And I lost in that category. So I spent $75,000 on VHSs and it didn't turn out.

But overall, on a day-to-day basis, I have outrageous returns. 50, 100, 200X returns. Samson, what are you laughing about? We gotta get outta here. Do you wanna see my Excel spreadsheet? Yes. That sounds like a party.

$75,000 on VHSs. David, punctuate the segment. What are you laughing about? I'm laughing because if it were this easy, everyone would do it. Everyone's not as smart as me. That's right. It's not easy. Darren Robell is the best. He's the winner. Jerk-off champion. Yes! Congrats on the Jerk-off. Congratulations to Darren Robell. Don't do that with your hands, Darren. I know. The champion of all the Jerk-offs. Folks, did you know that sleep is one of the most

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