The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: The Science of Electroejaculation

Episode Date: November 19, 2024

We kick things off with Against the Spread before Ron Magill shows up to discuss the animal kingdom. After our College Football Schedule Swap discussion, Billy asks Ron about the potential of swaps amongst animals in zoos, and there's surprisingly more of this than you might think. Ron takes us through the logistics of zoo trades, which animal sense he'd like to have, and describes electroejaculation. Then, we dive into The John Stamos Ethical Conundrum: is it better to support your friend who is going through cancer by donning a bald cap for a photo shoot or to not do anything at all? Plus, Roy Wood Jr. is here to share how it felt to be an America overseas during the election, info on Trump's cabinet picks, what the party was like at the All-MLB Awards, and why you should trust his Semi-Sure Bet of the Week despite him missing on his last attempt. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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NHL tonight, the Panthers are at the Jets. The Panthers coming off of a big win against Winnipeg, but they don't do well in Winnipeg. In the last seven games, following a win they have lost the last seven games in Winnipeg. Following a win, they have failed to cover the puck line

in five straight games in Winnipeg. But Sam Reinhardt is on the ten game point streak and Alexander Balikov is on the eight game point streak. But despite that, I'm gonna have to go with the Winnipeg Jets minus one and a half against the Stray. Blowout, wow. He's no homer.

What? Going to college football this weekend. I love this Colorado-Kansas game. I think it's gonna be a great game. Kansas is playing real well. Jalen Daniels figured out how to play the position again. He was really struggling at the early part of the year. They just won in midnight in Provo. You know, you don't do that in a midnight game. That's not something that you do. It's a really close line. It's two and a

half and I'm gonna take the home doggy. They've been really good to me the last two weeks being a two unit. Put the town on alert play and I'm gonna take the home doggy. They've been really good to me the last two weeks, being a two unit, put the town on alert play and I'm going right back to that well. And again, it's the spread. The spread. Billy, what do you got? Usually doesn't end with well, I mean. Yeah.

I'm gonna go with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers minus five at the New York Giants this week. Tommy DeVito's gonna be starting, we just had his agent on, however, I don't know, I don't think that he's gonna be taking down Baker Mayfield. I don't know who the hell is catching the ball for Baker right now except Auden out there. But besides him, I don't know who's on this team. But he finds a way to get it done, Dan. Alright, good analysis. No, it's Dan.

No, it's no bread. I don't know who's on the team. I thought Billy's was all we needed to hear. Mike Evans is out there. It's good analysis. I think Draper is out there. He doesn't know who's on that team either. Hey, I'll tell you what. You can criticize it if you will.

Only one person on here had the cojones, if you will, to take the Bills over the Chiefs last week in against the spread. And you're looking at who that person is right now. What's your record picking games again? Oh, in Against the Spread? I mean, I'm the defending champion. I won last year when we did Against the Spread.

But I mean the GBF thing. Yeah. Billy's big board. Last night he was one and two. One and two, yeah. So 30 and 16 on the season. That's really good. That's your...

It's an off week. Look at Dan. He's trying to poo-poo that. Yeah. This guy's... When he speaks on games, you should listen. Thanks. He's getting two-thirds of his games right. He just happened to be one and two last night

when we applied pressure and lights on him that he doesn't want because he cares about this very deeply and he doesn't want too much attention to be paid for this because it puts pressure on him. It should be pointed out by the way, just going back to last segment, Vanderbilt did not start the season five and oh, they lost to Georgia State.

I was using a hypothetical. What, an SEC team lost to Georgia State? I also wanna say. It's a hypothetical, Stu Gotts. Pressure births diamonds. So it's not pressure that I'm afraid of, it's just an under the weather week, it happens. It happens.

By the way, you know what I was thinking, gang, now that we're talking about it? I think if we're really gonna try to get this swap week off the ground, week 10 of the season, you're gonna need to opt into the swap by week eight. Ooh, I like that. Because I think that you need to let your intentions known whether you're swapping or not,

and then you have kind of like a two week build upon the situation. And people were asking me out there in the commissary, Billy, how does it work? Do the top teams pick first? What do you do here if you wanna be a spoiler, whatever? You know what I said? Backroom deals.

That's how swap week works. You don't know what's gonna happen until they just reveal it to you, on an ESPN special, of course. That's a great idea. This is almost what happened during COVID, remember? There were like some, all the games kept getting cancelled. There were some last minute games that needed to get played. There was that crazy Coastal Carolina game that happened like at

the last minute. It was kind of like that Billy. Love a good backroom deal. Put it on the poll please Juju at LeBotard showed. Do you love a good backroom deal? That's the only kind that's being made right now in order to dismantle our entire government and all of America Ron McGill joins us now to talk about the animals always delighted to see his happy face You can get pride of a lion the book that he did with Greg Cody. It is still available It is selling very well. It is a best seller So too is Greg Cody's back in my day and so too is Greg Cody back in my day, and so too is Greg Cody, I'm sorry, Stu Gotts' book,

Stu Gotts' personal record book that you can still get at StuGottsBook.com. Ron McGill joins us now, and I wanna show you a video to start here because termites and ants work interestingly as teammates, and we have a wall of soldiers here with termites and ants that we are Showing you here the wall of ants is protecting the other ants here from any kind of attack How this is just normal teamwork behavior from ants and termites Ron?

You know Dan, I got to be honest. I'm not sure I don't I'm not that familiar with ants and termites other than that You know, they will dominate the world eventually that they're more the weight of ants and termites far surpasses the weight of all human beings on the planet But I don't know of ants and termites working collaboratively that way Except one protecting against the other. I don't not sure put it on the pole, please Juju. Will ants and termites rule the world? Ron, have you read the book In Immense World by Ed Young? I have not, but I've heard about it. Okay, I started reading. It seems like something that you would be into, but if there was any animal sense that you could have, like sensory trait that you could have, what would it be?

I guess I'd love to have the sight of an eagle, the sight of a bird of prey. I mean, this is a bird that to put it in perspective, if you had the eyes of an eagle, you could read a newspaper a hundred yards away. Ron, there's been a lot of talk in the college football community about maybe implementing a swap week.

It has me wondering, at zoos, oftentimes animals are on loan. Is there ever like a barter system when you loan animals? So like you say like, well, loan you are, you know, a panda I know is like property of China, but like I'll loan you a kangaroo in exchange for two jaguars or something like that. How does that work?

It can happen that way. We can do that. We can sometimes exchange the same species of animals just to get a different bloodline. You know, we might have a male giraffe that is an offspring of our herd and we need to get new bloodline in there. So we may call the Memphis Zoo out of, just grabbing out of the air and say,

listen, we'll trade our male giraffe for your male giraffe, depending on what the stud book says. We have stud books, basically stud books are kind of like computerized dating. They tell us which animals should be paired with what other animals to keep the healthiest bloodline. So zoos do exchange the same animals back and forth. We put them, we have animals that are acquired

through what we call exhibit loans, where we're just putting an animal out there on exhibit. It might be surplus to another zoo, but we can use it on our habitat here and be here as strictly as an exhibit loan. We have breeding loans, where if they come over as a breeding loan, let's say we take a male gorilla

to put with a female gorilla here at the zoo. The way that works out is that we would get the first, third, fifth, and so on offspring. The loaning zoo would own the second, fourth, and sixth offspring. You divide the offspring that way, and then they could use those offspring as collateral to trade for other animals.

But basically, the overwhelming majority of all the animals you see in zoos today are animals that are born in zoos and they're exchanged back and forth to maintain the healthiest genetic bloodlines for that captive population. So zoos are like rosters. Like, who do you look around?

What's a roster you look, another zoo you look at and you say, that's a damn good roster they got over there. I wanna make a deal with them. You know, it's not necessarily that we make that decision. That decision is sometimes made at a higher level. Again, the stud bookkeeper, who would kind of be the general manager of that species, would say, okay, you know what?

This male needs to go to that zoo to be with that female, because according to their bloodlines, they're gonna produce the most genetically viable offspring. So do they make animals like free agents? They just list them in this stud book? Like they put them out on- Are they on like a Tinder app? They're like on waivers essentially.

Well, yes, we do put out surplus lists. Zoos put out surplus lists on what is surplus to their collection. And we work with the AZA, the Association of Zoos and Aquariums, so they have great communication between the institutions to see who needs what. And they work with the stud bookkeepers throughout the AZA

and all those recommendations are made collaboratively. The zoos, you know, accredited zoos don't work as little islands on themselves. They all work together with the other accredited zoos to maintain the best populations under human care. So you don't get into like bidding wars with other zoos. No, no, we don't get into, no, no, no bidding wars. What's the worst-

As a matter of fact, it's rare that you actually, the zoos actually pay money to other zoos. They're all done basically on different types of loan agreements, exhibit loan, breeding loan, you know, that type of thing. What's the worst trade you ever made? You tried to, you gave up like a veteran rhino. You got like a young giraffe,

but the giraffe just did not pan out. Sam Rhino. Hey. You know, Chris, I can't think off the top of my head of anything that worked out that way. We've had some animals that we've, you know, brought in in the hopes of a breeding loan. And the bottom line is,

the mate that they were paired up with didn't like that particular animal. And that's a big misconception people have. All heck their animals, we'll put them together, they'll do what comes naturally. That's not the case at all. And a lot of these species, the animals generally have to kind of get along

and like each other before you can get a successful breeding. So that's the biggest part of the challenge is to introduce these animals to each other in a way that they accept each other and that leads to the breeding. But oftentimes that doesn't happen. What happens if heaven forbid the animal dies under your care that's on loan? Well hopefully it was something that can be accounted for. You know animals, everything that lives is going to die one day. Depends where and when it dies. You know if the animal dies

prematurely from something that could have been avoided, then you know, we've got a responsibility. We've gotta be accountable and we're gonna have to answer to that. But generally speaking, and you know, as long as we provide the documentation that the animal received the proper care, that it was being, you know, properly monitored

and cared for, again, everything that lives is gonna die. And just because it happens to die under your watch doesn't mean it was your fault. Perhaps. Ron, do the animals have like a hinge app or something? That was unnecessary. What? That perhaps was not necessary there.

You cover your bases after the animal dies. It just wasn't needed. Well done, Zugats. Ron, do the animals have like a maybe like a hinge or a tinder where they can swipe and they're like, oh that that giraffe at The San Diego Zoo looks like my type. I don't want to go to the zoo in Tulsa. I don't like that one. Not cute Yeah, just you know, the bottom line is animals of course the The only time they get to make the decision is when we introduce them

They don't get to look at a video screen and go. Oh, yeah, he's hot or she's great. No, no, no, that's that We make that decision initially. We introduced them. And then we find out whether we made the right decision. What percentage of time, roughly, uh, when you put animals together, do they successfully breed? Like when you say this is a challenge and it's part of what it is that you do, what's the success rate? I would say between 60 and 70% somewhere in that neighborhood. Okay. So more often than not, efficient offense. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. All things considered. Do you set up like a blanket, put a nice dinner together for them so they really get to know each

other? Listen, it also depends on the species, guys. You know, some, you know, you put a couple of rabbits together, you're going to get baby rabbits right away. Put two pandas together, that's a much bigger challenge. When you take into consideration, listen, a female panda can only get pregnant three days in the entire year. What? Okay. That's the only window she has to get pregnant three days in the entire year.

You have to figure out when is the right time to put the male in with her because they're normally solitary animals. They don't want to be with each other until that time comes. So you've got to be studying the urine of the female, find out the, you know, the hormone level to find out if she's in fact cycling and then you can put them together and then it might not be successful anyway because she might say he's ugly I don't want to have anything to do with him so there's a big challenge it depends on the species but if you're gonna look generally overall speaking I think between 60 and 70 percent of pairings

that are done in accredited institutions can be successful. He also like he could have bad swimmers too it's always the female panda that gets blamed sometimes the male panda he can't do it either. You're wholeheartedly correct. We had that issue with one of our tigers that when we finally did a electro ejaculation to examine the sperm, that yes, he had a very, very low number of effective swimmers in there.

So the onus was on him. Don't shame a man like that. Ron, what's the percentage of planned breeding versus unplanned? Like how many surprise baby animals do you get? Well, I'd like to say we get very few. I don't know of any surprise baby animals that we've had here at the zoo in the last several years.

Every one of these births is pretty carefully planned knowing where these offspring are to end up. And that's one of the big responsibilities. Hence we have a very effective birth control program here. We've got animals that have either been vasectomized, we've got animals that are on birth control pills, we've got animals that are on birth control implants where you know you implant the thing and it kind of time releases hormones to convince the female she's pregnant so she never ovulates. So these birth control programs are very clearly and carefully planned and once we say okay know, the St. Louis Zoo needs a new giraffe,

we have a place to put a baby giraffe, okay. Put them together, let's see if we can get lucky there. And then we know where that baby's going. But you know, that's the difference between accredited institutions and sometimes non-accredited institutions where they're just breeding to get babies because they wanna come in to bring people in

to see the baby animals and take pictures and draw the gate. Whereas we as accredited institutions have a moral responsibility to make sure there's a good place for every baby that's born. Ron, I know many times over the years you grow emotionally attached to animals at the zoo and when they pass away, sometimes you're even brought to tears. What's the opposite situation? What are the big major breeds of animals at the zoo that it's very tough to get close

to? major breeds of animals at the zoo that it's very tough to get close to. You know what I'm saying? If you pass away you're like, too bad. I don't know if we ever just say, but you know, basically it correlates with the intelligence of the animal and the most that we can relate to it. You know, people I guess do not have like major depressions and funerals of let's say lizard dies or a snake dies as opposed to a gorilla, or koala,

or something that people tend to associate more with affection and a connection that way. So, of course invertebrates, I mean, there comes a time where we actually have to, we have tropical roaches that we have in our tropical forest that, you know, as they reproduce at a very rapid rate, we actually use some of them as food for other animals. So we're actually submitting them to become food for animals. So not only are we not crying over their death, but we're causing their

death. Put it please as the program description, electro-ejaculation. It is not a phrase I had heard before this episode. I'm always learning about things on this episode. But you're intrigued by it, Dan. Well, so are you. I wanna know more. Jess, I noticed that you sprung in the action there

a little bit, I was not the only one interested in electro-ejaculation. Smutty smutty. That's basically taking an electric probe and putting it up the rectum. No, we got it. I want to hear that. I want to hear that.

For those who don't get it. It's science. Totally understood exactly what was happening. It is science. That is correct. Ron, thank you for being on with us. We appreciate it. Always a pleasure, guys.

Have a great day. Only interested in that because it is science. That is the scientific description. Roy has been so efficient today. Yes, very small windows. He has worked well. He has used one word where I am using 50. Hey DraftKings fans, are you ready to elevate

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Don Lebatard. The elephant went into a 7-Eleven and bought a pack of cigarettes. But my question to Ron is this. Stugatz. That joke didn't really land the way you wanted it to, did it? We all just stared at you. This is the Don Lebatard Show with the StuGats. I want to get to this John Stamos story, though, because Chris Cody had a lot of opinions about this. And I was looking at him and I was listening to him.

And he slowly was winning me over. And then I went and checked the internet and realized that most people were with Chris Cody on this and John Stamos, who was trying to do something nice for his friend, Dave Coulier, who has stage three cancer and is fighting, he announced this on morning television a couple of weeks ago, and I remember a whole lot of people had a very strong reaction to this because,

I know this has happened a lot recently, where we've lost a lot of people that mean something emotionally to you even though you don't totally know them. And this couple of people, John Stamos and Dave Coulier, represent a time and a place and a nostalgia and a childhood and I was discovering entertainment with these people.

I grew up in some ways around these people on television and stay most famously doesn't age just every time you look at stay most you don't understand how he's one of the few people in in all of fame that doesn't seem to look any older but if you've seen this act of solidarity here from john stamos he's wearing a bald cap while he's with dave coulier and everyone sees that it's

a bald cap and he's got stamos has famous hair right so he is bringing attention to the fact that he's not doing the thing that everyone wants him to do which is now pressure him to shave the hair. That's not an act of solidarity, that's you wearing a costume. Look, I saw this headline, People Magazine, they had the picture of them together, and my first thought was, I just learned about the Dave Couillet cancer thing.

I was like, oh my God, that's terrible. What a cool thing John Stamos is doing, showing solidarity. And then I read the fine print, I'm like, oh, he didn't do the thing, he just put on a bald cap. Look, he's still supporting his friend, but I'm just picturing John Stamos afterwards, whipping it off, walking into the bathroom,

and just being like, all right, we're good to go here. We're good to go before we get out of here. It can't look ridiculous walking out of here. It's not really a sacrifice, it's a photo walk. It's just, my point is, photo walk. Yeah, yeah. I'm giving voice to the internet Billy Do not take the position on the other side of this Oh, I absolutely agree with Chris if you want to support your friends support your friend go all out and shave your head

Like if you're really he's going through a difficult time if you care about him enough You'll support him to the point where you will shave off that oneuscious hair. I don't really want to judge someone else's support. The Colts cheerleaders shaved their heads when Chuck Pagano had cancer. Or did they wear bald caps? No, they shaved their heads. That's hard to believe. What? It's hard to believe.

Wait, the Stamos? That the cheerleaders shaved their heads? No, they did. I'll find pictures. I want to see a photo. Just sickening for me, folks. He could have just sat idly by and not done anything and you would have just assumed he loved his friend,

was gonna support him no matter what, just didn't have to shave his head. No one was clamoring for him to shave his head before this photo op. I would have been, if he was just fully with his hair, just supporting his friend. So you'd rather him do nothing? I would rather, I would honestly, I think I'd support.

I'm good with him just having his hair though, because he still has his hair Yes, but he did next to nothing which is a little bit better My reaction to it was like oh like oh, it's just I had my guttural reaction. I'm not judging it I love John Stamos. I love day cuy a I hope you're judging it a little I was just surprised I was like it went from holy shit. What a nice thing John Stamos has a great hair I can't believe he did this. Oh, he didn't It was just my honest reaction to it. I bet you think Kirk Herbstreet's bringing that other dog around too soon

Oh, no, I bet that's what you Greg Cody, I don't understand why you would question as misinformation Billy's cult story I don't understand the point or question as misinformation Billy's cult story. I don't understand the point or the purpose of questioning that story. I never heard it at the time. So if you didn't hear it, it didn't happen. Yeah, I'm not sure it did.

Okay, very good. And yes, Mike, I think that the dog. I appreciate your rigorous vetting process, journalistically. Yeah. Herbie should have given a little buffer, a couple weeks between dogs. No, first of all, your guys' Ben Herbstreet takes

have now gotten me in trouble. People are commenting on my post and they're like, shame on you for being disrespectful to Herbstreet's dog. And I was like, I was the only one that defended him, but by association with all of you, now I'm getting shit-welded. I didn't say anything. I didn't have to do it anymore.

I don't know what you're talking about. I think it's pretty messed up with Chris's new. I just don't know why that other dog couldn't have come with him previously. It was like that dog was in the minor league. Because then you guys would have been like, oh, there's two dogs. I just love the idea. I got a second dog at home. Looks just like this dog.

He's waiting. Waiting to get called up. He's not ready for that private jet yet. He's almost there. Come here, buddy. You almost ready? You almost ready? So you have Stamos immediately leaving the photo off, just whipping off the skull cap and shaking his hair out

like in a shampoo commercial. And making sure that it looks perfect before he goes back out into public. Can I be the one person in the room who defends John Stamos here? No. I'm sorry. No you're not, because I defend John Stamos because he's showing support. sorry. No you're not because there's I defend

John Stamos because he's showing support. You could be the one person in this room along with me. Right. The gestures count, right? Whatever happened to the phrase, it's the thought that counts. He had a very nice thought on how to support. Yeah, but the thought did make us think that he had shaved a famous bit of hair. Like the thought. He sold us a bill of goods. No good he didn't if you saw the original post on his Instagram he said I donned a bald cap and I touched up my Photoshop skills he never once I didn't try to pretend like he actually shaved his head Mike can you please help me looking up the bill of goods because that sounds I've always thought that's a receipt the bill of goods and and so when you someone sells you a bill of goods because that sounds I've always thought that's a receipt the bill of goods

And and so when you someone sells you a bill of goods Does it mean that they're just selling you the cost of something versus the actual goods the the expression? Because I don't believe John Stamos sold us a bill of goods But he did plant the thought that he himself had shaved his head in solidarity, and he didn't in fact shave his head, and so it then allowed the internet the opening of, wait a minute, wait a minute, that solidarity doesn't smell quite as much

like solidarity as I need solidarity to smell. It just gets lessened for me when I'm picturing him texting his assistant, hey, can you get me a bald cap? I thought of a good idea. Whose idea was this? Like, how did this happen and then become a photo shoot is what I'm kind of wondering. Like, who alerted people?

Like, we got an idea. It was, it was in People magazine. Oh, I thought, I'm sorry, I thought it was something that was just on their Instagram account. I feel like I've gone too far. I don't want to say it. Like, what I was just about to say, I don't want to say it.

What was it? Just say it and then we'll tell you if it was too far. I don't wanna say it. Like what I was just about to say, I don't wanna say it. What was it? Just say it and then we'll tell you if it was too far. Do you picture Dave Couye like sitting in that photo? Like is he thinking, John did everything he could. This is as far as John could have gone. Or is he sitting there saying, he. I mean he's saying, did John come over from the set of the alien movie that he's doing?

Because he put on. No, this is a great topic. It's an ethical conundrum for sure. But did Dave ever think to himself, John should shave it off? This is not solidarity the way I want it. Without hair, John Stamos? Not great eyebrows, I gotta tell you.

They both have beautiful skulls though. He does, yeah. Well that's not John's, that's the thing, we don't know. Beautiful skulls, you sound like a British colonist. A lot of surface area on those foreheads. Hey, podcasters. It's Mike Ryan. And let me tell you something.

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see dkng.co. slash bball. Don LeBattard. He has been great. He's made great hires. I said all. We've said all of it. He said all of it. We've said all of it.

First time I heard any of this, Greg. Everything you're saying. It's all been said. It's all been said. Okay, you gotta understand one thing. Stugats. Me maximum. That's right.

Until I say it, it hasn't been said. Boom. Okay, understand that. You're the mayor. Until I say it, it hasn't been said. Me maximum. Me maximum. Me maximum. Me maximum. That's right. Until I say it, it hasn't been said. Boom. Okay, understand that. You're the mayor. Until I say it, it hasn't been said. Me maximum.

Me maximum. Me maximum. Me maximum. Me maximum. This is the Don LeBathard Show with the StuGats. Roy Wood Jr. is going to be with us in just a second, but I am told by Mike Ryan and I'm afraid of what he's about to announce, that Dave Coulier has just announced something that has the potential to make Chris Cody and others on the internet who are arguing

about this feel really bad, because once Dave Coulier gets in the mix, whatever he says ends up being the arbiter of all of this. He put out a statement as Chris Cody was talking. Maybe he was watching. I'm sorry to see a bunch of negative comments as I've just begun my cancer journey. It's our friendship, me and John, and this is how we are handling a very tough time. I'm a comedian and humor is what drives me. John knows how to cheer me up and I laughed out loud when he arrived wearing a bald cap, being a true, loving friend and brother. He also goes on to say that he's heard

from so many of his fans saying they've been inspired to check themselves out, because if it can happen to Dave Coulier, it can happen to me, and that this is all about raising awareness to get people active and making sure they are healthy and cancer-free. He wishes nothing but love

for you though, Chris. He laughed out loud, but what was he thinking inside? Billy, you were making faces throughout that. I don't know what any of those faces meant. I think Dave Coulier is a really great guy because he said, me and John are going through something right now. It's like, no, buddy, you are. John wore a bolt cap. You're the one going through something. You have cancer. But his friend is also also like that one hurts No, they are very close. The three of them were

Very close and it was very sad when Bob Saget passed away to see those two friends. They they really formed a strong true Brotherhood amongst them as a they often reference and they're often seen out together Also one of the top headlines on TMZ John Stamos announces death of longtime best friend, like losing a piece of myself. So Chris, I think you just apologize to Stamos when we move on. You were just supporting Chris though, it seemed like. Me?

I mean, I owe him an apology. I do. I feel bad now. Oh, me? No, I was wrong. He knows his friend. He knows what kind of support he wants. And if it's good for Dave, then it's good for me.

Dave, I am sorry. Dave, I am sorry. John, I am sorry. Roy, you wanna apologize to anyone? No, let's get Roy. Let's leave Roy. Not you, other Roy. Oh, sorry. Let's leave Roy Wood Jr. out of this.

He doesn't have to apologize to anybody. He's the host of Have I Got News for You. I've told you it's good. It's on Max, it's on CNN on Saturday, and then Max on Sunday, and he's also got shows in Hawaii coming up next March if you're making vacation plans you comedians all have that grift that Hawaii grift that Hawaii grift like it is a great grift right you just that you

spend a week paying for yourself to have a vacation and just sharpen the material in a lovely place. That's it, and they get all the stuff that I know they haven't seen on TV yet, because it's Hawaii. I'm not doing new material in Hawaii. They get the polished goldie only. It's like going to see Elton John at the garden, baby.

Let me find one in my bag of, this next joke's from 2018. Remember all the hubba-booloo about the national anthem and whether or not we should stand. This one goes out to y'all. Hullabaloo is a great word. He knows what all the funny words are. You will get his semi-sure bet of the week in a moment, but we haven't talked to you since an ominous election day

where you promised us everything would be okay. Yeah, my bad, sorry about that. That's why we call it a semi-sure bet. It didn't come home. I thought it would. That's my fault there, Dan Leventhal. I was out the country. I don't know if anyone else has been out the country

yet since the election, but I will say this. You can't be allowed American anymore. I was in England and like, you know, you can be America, America, America. And like British people were coming up to me like, well, what have you done? What have you done? And I'm like, first of all, I'm not Latino, ask one of them because I was told they're the ones who did it, not me. Ask the white women wearing the friendship, it wasn't me bracelets, which by the way, you won't talk about a griff.

That's a quality, that's right up there with those Lance Armstrong, Liv Strong, even though I'm cheating bracelets. I don't think that's what they're called. They should be called out now. To sell a group of people, hey man, you see all that hate they throwing at your group? Wear this bracelet and trust me, black people will be perfectly fine identifying you

as a proper democratic voter. Morons. I wish I had the courage to grift merch off of political, the emotions, the political emotions in this country. I'm this close to it, Dan Lebatard. I don't wanna start a media empire like you. I just wanna make money off of terrible cotton t-shirts that shrink after two washes.

20th anniversary jerseys, LebatardAF.com is where you get them. Oh. What do you make, Roy, 20th anniversary jerseys lebatard af.com is where you get though What do you make what do you make Roy of? just the systemic sort of trying to break the government of the cabinet picks I Don't I don't think that any of the I'll say this You're not going to discourage

Republicans from confirming Matt Gaetz by saying he's creepy. And I think one thing that the election proved is no matter how much proof you have of somebody being creepy, people are going to like who they like. You'd have better luck saying that Matt Gaetz puts pineapple on pizza. And that being the type of thing that gets him, you know, unconfirmed, if you will. But you know, they're gonna do what they wanna do. So we're along for the ride, or if you have enough money, you can leave the country.

Or if you're a broke bitch like me, you can just leave Twitter or whatever social media site you don't to go to anymore You're past the point of being wounded or angry by the latest development that is more absurd than the previous absurd development You can be angry but to run the same playbook against it as futile like I think I really think and it's gonna take time to see how this happens, but I think at some point humor has to change to a degree. And to be critical to show what's going on, yes, that's needed for a democratic republic when it's time for I told you so by midterms, but

to feel like you're going to reach the electorate who you didn't connect with for the general election by the same strategy of hurling insults, I don't know. We had Congressman Tim Burchett on our show on CNN, and it was a pretty back and forth episode in terms of the tension of it, but I felt like we were better off having them on than not having them on and it just being, you know, basically a media version of blue sky where it's everybody seeing everything as one way and doing everything one way and that being the singular approach. Now I'm also not saying that you as a media organization should be going to the White House to kiss the ring of Trump, but I don't think that you should be keeping everything, you know, just in one political

box. So, you know, I don't know how you get people to see what the hell is going on, but I think this might be one of those situations where you kind of got to sit back and just let Americans take their medicine and just go, look, this is what y y'all voted for so let's see how it goes. The name of his show is Have I Got News for You. It's excellent and it's a news quiz. It's very easy to watch, fun to watch. CNN Saturdays 9 p.m. Eastern and it streams Sunday on Macs. Yes Roy? Before we get into the semi-sure bet, real quick broader pop

culture question. I have an eight-year-old. I introduced him to the JJ Abrams Star Trek universe. He loved it. I want at some point to introduce him to Star Wars. Do I do it four through six then one through three or one through six? It's gotta be four through six. Yeah it's gotta be four through six. Yeah, it's gotta be four through six. Roy is nodding his head vigorously because? Because, I mean, it's old school. You gotta go that way. You gotta show four through six

because that's what came first chronologically. Somebody sent me a clip of Patton Oswalt saying there's something called the machete cut. Would you go four, five, two, three, six to do some sort of hide the Darth Vader Lucas's I'm your father reveal type nonsense. Whoa, spoiler. Yeah. Hang on a second. Whoa, spoiler alert. I haven't seen them yet. I don't know. I figured I'd ask you guys. You guys have kids that are older than me and you've

taken them on this journey before. I just don't know which way to do this. I'll put you on a text. Star Wars Empire Strikes Back Return of the Jedi that's the first three you have to watch. I will put you on a text string with Amin Elhassen who is our resident Star Wars expert or John Amici and they will tell you the right way to go on this it is not Stuarts he is not our expert on this. Roy agrees. Before we get to.

You go Lethal Weapon 2 then Bad Boys 3 then you go back to lethal weapon one to really appreciate the partnership Before we get to your semi sure bet of the week Can you tell us what were the highlights of hosting the MLB award show? I was surprised to see you pop up there It was dope to see a lot of the players there, you know played along along really well man was Gary Sheffield man. I gotta give a shout out to Gary Sheffield. We had a joke in there where basically we cut to all the smiling players. You know so many great smiling players including Gary Sheffield cut to classic Sheffield death stare. It was probably one of the best jokes of the night but just the gratitude of Mookie Betts to be able to show up there and

show love to all the past and present players. Skeens was in attendance. We got Shota Imanaga to sing Go Cubs Go. Like, and this man, his English is getting there, but when I tell you, when it was time to sing that damn song, he knew that damn song. And it was a beautiful thing. It truly was a beautiful thing to just see all the players kind of let their hair down. And I think what MLB is trying to do is eventually make this kind of like a players weekend kind of chill pat each other on the back type situation before all the Cy Youngs and MVPs get announced. But it was dope. It really was a good ass time, man. This segment is presented by LinkedIn jobs.

Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com slash prep. Terms and conditions apply. As baseball tries to get younger and bring in a younger demo that does it a little differently, Roy, did it feel ethnic? Did the award show embrace different cultures? Oh, absolutely. I mean, you had Clausay up there, he was winning awards.

That was one of the jokes we talked about that night is that the game is so much more international now. I grew up, when I watched baseball, I could pronounce all the names. You know, I grew up watching Dave, Harold, and a dude named Oil Can. Dave Harrell and a dude named Oil Can. And the Astros had a guy this past season named Cucucci. And I don't even know if that's a word you can say on TV without saying the full name.

So it's for sure way more international. My God, they played a game in Birmingham. They're going to a NASCAR track and then they're going to Tokyo. But what's left? What is your semi-sure bet of the week, sir? Okay, so when a middle-aged man faces off against an athlete 18 years or younger than him, the middle-aged man wins. When old man beats young man, the attorney general nominee for that year

and secretaries of defense get confirmed. So here's what I'm attaching this to. When old man beats young man, you get the president gets the secretary of defense and the attorney general that they want. Satchel Paige, 59 years old, pitched three squirrels against the Red Sox. The new attorney general that year was confirmed. 1993, Nolan Ryan beat the piss out of Robin Ventura. Janet Reno was confirmed. 1994

George Foreman 45 years old beat out Mike beat Michael Moore who was 19 younger. That year secretary of defense confirmed. 2021 Phil Mickelson 50 years old paired with Brooks Capkidan. 31 years old Phil Mickelson, 50 years old, paired with Brooks Capkidan. 31 years old. Phil Mickelson won the PGA championship by two strokes that year. Merrick Garland and Lloyd Austin were confirmed. However, 1988 at the US Open in tennis, Jimmy Connors took on an 18-year-old Andre Agassi and lost. A few years later, the Secretary of Defense

was rejected by the Senate. Now, Mike Tyson lost to a younger Logan Paul. That's the Paulie foe, right? No, Jake Paul. Whichever one. Mike Tyson lost to a white boy. Okay, Mike Tyson got some money to dance in the ring with a white boy. We don't have time for that part of the situation.

But the point is, Mike Tyson lost. That means the dude from Fox News is not gonna run the Pentagon. Bad news is, the backup for that dude in 88 was Dick Cheney. So now, here's what I'm telling you. Because we're not gonna get the defense secretary confirmed, you're gonna get Hulk Hogan as your next defense secretary. Put everything you own on that right now.

That is my semi-sure, bed of the week, and you have Jake Paul. All right. Put it on the poll, Juju. Are you okay with Hulk Hogan as the secretary of defense? I think I would be. Roy, thank you for being on with us. Have I Got News for you? It's a very good show.

It's on CNN Saturdays at 9pm Eastern and Sundays on Max. Season's Greetings podcast audience. It's Mike Ryan. And now is that time of year where you start hosting your family gatherings, be it Thanksgiving, be it the upcoming holiday season, you're gonna have some folks in town, you're gonna be doing some entertaining. So why don't you make your family time a Miller time? It's the first thing that I roll out when I got guests over at the house, an ice cold bucket filled with that beautiful white can. See, Miller Time makes family time all the more special, because for one thing, it's got taste that you can

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