The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Dan Hates the Hurricanes

Episode Date: January 15, 2026

"They LOVE me in the streets." The crew does their best to restore Dan's credentials with the city of Miami, including Tony, who is disgusted with Dan's lack of knowledge of Cuban coffee. For a g...uy who's always saying the phrase 'uniquely Miami,' he sure seems more uniquely Miami Beach, and for those of you who don't understand this reference, just know it's hitting Dan where it hurts the most. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:55 Medcan. Live well for life. Visit medcan.com slash moments to get started. So I feel a little bit like I'm going to be walking on eggshells today. Why is that? Well, I always like when we have David Sampson on. I'm going to have David Sampson today. He's very polarizing. Not everyone feels that way.
Starting point is 00:01:12 I know. People are like, oh, what's Sampson like? He must be an asshole. Like, no, I like. He's always been really good to me. Like, I like David. Took me to Pearl Jam. Doesn't everybody here like David?
Starting point is 00:01:23 I don't know. I haven't done a poll. Roy feels some type of way. I love David, man. And that's a good dude. Yeah. I'm just kidding. Everybody likes David.
Starting point is 00:01:32 He's grown on me, you know. Many years ago, I would not have said I like David Samson. But he's grown on me, genuinely. It's one of the things I get from people where it's like, listen, Dan, I don't know Dan very well. Dan seems like a great guy. And I just don't understand how he can be friends with David Samson. I get that. People think Dan's a great guy.
Starting point is 00:01:51 So I feel like, I feel like I'm walking a little bit on eggshells today because I love talking to David. And I just, I don't understand. how he's working through everything right now. I really don't. I've been asking him about a leave. I think it's probably appropriate for him to leave, but he also gets whatever joy there is to be had in life these days from having an audience for an hour that cares about what he has to say about things. He's built that. It's hard to build. Zaz, you know how hard these things are to build. Mike, you know how hard these things are to build. But David built a media career in five years, because he's in the volume business.
Starting point is 00:02:29 He can do two hours a day by himself. Like nobody can do that. I think you've gone through your stuff too in your family, Dan, and I think that this audience, this community around the show and the doing and the making of stuff does provide some relief, a bit of a cathartic experience making this stuff and being supported by a community that you've helped create. But you could also tell he works really hard.
Starting point is 00:02:56 hard at bringing the show together? Yeah. How does he find the mindset to do it? I don't know. This is a pretty strange start. I can't lie, yeah. I'm a little uncomfortable. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:09 This was always supposed to be a meeting that was off air that was overheard by the audience. That's what the Shadow Show was supposed to be, but instead it became your performances. Oh, yeah, Pabloito, what's good, bro? Oh, yeah, Mora de la Pida. The dork. Look, I resolve how Cuban are you, okay? I'm gonna get all the corner, God. Here we'll get to get a bit of who is the Cubano,
Starting point is 00:03:38 Arrepentio. Billy Corbyn. It's propping naked. What are you in that aluminum pink? Dipping out. Cortaditos. Cookies, always cookies. I'm gonna do you.
Starting point is 00:03:50 I'm not even left yet. Dallet, my man, I don't know. Two claws. I don't know what Talco is. Oh, Jesus. It's a guy who is, Blank. You're a crick. Look a collada that I imagine it would be like your mama.
Starting point is 00:04:06 For your madre. Composa, is that like the raspberry compote they do on Great British baking show? Saludo. Hey, that's great to hear it. How do we feel about the hurricanes? Oh, the hurricanes. The New Yorkermy and the hurricanes living in the of our family.
Starting point is 00:04:23 How did I do? Guess what we're doing the party? We're doing it at Bird Bowl. This talco and baby powder the same thing? Yes, you dofish. All right. What kind of Cuban are you? Oops.
Starting point is 00:04:32 There goes another rob a tree. The money is in town. You guys feel it, right? Because the city's being wallpapered for advertisements to big-time football, college football. Both teams. It's the Cuban Super Bowl. Fernando Mendoza has as many ads around town already as everywhere. You see them everywhere as the University of Miami playing a home game.
Starting point is 00:05:04 It's not good luck Columbus kids. I saw one that's just good luck Fernando. No, Cubans are divided, and this is a good time for that. Sports has torn apart the Cuban community. Look, Mike has seen enough of this to know that ESPN Deportes was stuffed into a corner of the Clevelander with us. Here's what's left of it. Here's what's left of ESPN Deportes in the last five years.
Starting point is 00:05:29 It's the biggest game is in Miami, and we're going to latin it up, and we're going to do so with Greg Cody singing in a cowboy hat. prancing around the studio to introduce people, new people, to our show because the biggest thing is here. It's in town and you already feel it. Nobody can get anywhere. Donald Trump being in town during a big event, Miami thing, is going to make it take 17 hours for any person trying to get into that place. It's going to be Trump sitting there alone at game time. Just trying to stick to sports as my hockey team goes to the White House.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Are you leaving for- As my soccer team can't celebrate the club world cup Without him on the stage, as I can experience a world cup in this country Without his every single Fingerprint all over it And now at the national championship game, Which I just knew was going to happen. Okay, well, but so let's talk about this
Starting point is 00:06:27 Is this giant monstrosity comes to town here And I want to figure out what planes to fly over the stadium. Help me fly some planes. Interesting way to frame that. Probably airspace is going to be restricted. I want to do some advertising. You don't think you can have just the planes circling around? I think airspace is going to be at a premium and restricted.
Starting point is 00:06:48 So you may want to pivot. Maybe one of those buses. No, you don't think it's funny for our logo with some joke and a banner to be weaving in and out of military planes? You don't think that's funny? No. And I honestly don't even think our logo would fly with Keynes fans either. Are we a playoff team now?
Starting point is 00:07:05 Probably even more polarizing amongst Keynes fans than Donald Trump. In fact, I know that to be the case. I have at least seen hats supporting him at the games. All right, look. Here we go with this. No, we can get into this because I was being heckled from the bowling alley. Greg and Chris Cody telling me what their friends are saying about how offensive the things I'm doing are. We'll get to that in a second.
Starting point is 00:07:30 People are mad at you. I'm a provocateur. I've been doing this for 30 years. Look, you broke a bottle of. over my chin 25 years ago because you're mad at me. Don't care. Built the empire around our program. I love it. I went to school there. Did journalism there. Don't care who's mad about it. Didn't care about it 25 years ago. Program's been very good to me. I love it. I've always respected it and I've always told it story well. Yes, you have always told it story well. I think most Keynes fans don't
Starting point is 00:07:58 think that you respect it. And I know this from the enormous amount of fanfare that I got for yesterday's segment, defending Mario Cristobal. Dan, I think here's where the confusion is. And let me try to explain this as best I can. You're a guy that has historically put on for Miami better than anybody else. When those heat teams were going and the entire world was against Miami, you didn't give a single flying F about who was coming your way. You do not step to this town and talk shit about it.
Starting point is 00:08:27 And when there is a team for a school that you went to, a team that reflects this town better than anyone has ever had, you seem to both sides it. I know, look, Jeremy, it's great that we have a villain. Billy doing his shit-serring thing, that was cool. But for it to come from somebody that went to the school, who already got a reputation working against him, people, I think, incorrectly place a lot of the sanction stuff on you, as you know.
Starting point is 00:08:52 You know about that Pell Grant? Yeah, I mean, you got scooped on it. Can you say the one word there incorrectly again? No, let's give people, since we're here, okay, since we're here, look, this is a long time and coming. have a relationship with the school, the community around the school, speak at its classes, have loved the school, will always love the school, I'm wildly grateful for all of the opportunities it presented, including the stage right now, because they helped us build this
Starting point is 00:09:21 thing with all the things I learned from them and their program. Look, it's been a rough 20 years. I'm trying to calmly explain why people feel this way about you. in the local hour over several years, rather than trying to be rah-rah about the home team, like we are seemingly with all the other sports. Dolphins, we tee off on and that's understandable because they've been miserable and we've got to find a way to find the fun content. But for whatever reason, when it comes to the Miami Hurricanes,
Starting point is 00:09:49 we give the other side more than we give the pro stuff. I know I am not the only Miami Hurricane fan in this studio. I'm surrounded by them. You're a Miami Hurricane fan. You're a Miami Hurricane fan. These two guys in front of me are a Miami Hurricanes fan. The only person that's not a Miami Hurricane fan is Jeremy, who reps UCF and Indiana and whoever Miami is playing. That's understandable.
Starting point is 00:10:11 And yet, I think it's outsized and has been outsized on this show, giving voice to the dissenting opinions that it's become the opinion. And this is the reality. This is the perception of our show. The show, outside of me, is largely perceived amongst our community to be an anti-Miamy Okay, and so let me, Jesus, I didn't realize I had to explain this to the audience. Never mind that I had to explain this to you. I didn't think I would have to explain any of this specifically to you. We're doing a show that has represented our city for 20 years through all of that conflict,
Starting point is 00:10:47 and the story starts, okay, just so we remember what our roots are here. Before our radio station existed, I'm fighting in 90s, Miami, with the incumbent radio station, who's killing me for 10 years while using all of my columns that are about race relations and what's going on really at the University of Miami
Starting point is 00:11:08 with its players and who they actually are as everything that's being reported is gun charges and cocaine and Michael Irvin ran over somebody's foot near the library. For 10 years, that radio station is crushing me and using my columns for content
Starting point is 00:11:22 to make themselves radio stars. While I'm coming up to that school as a Cuban Miami me through the same Miami Cristobal came up through. Can you please mention how your parents fled to this country so I can get bingo for freedom. I'm going to tell you the entirety of the story. I know you guys know the story, okay? Yes.
Starting point is 00:11:38 And I know you're bored by the story, but I'm going to tell the entirety of the story because of how I feel about this program and because I've been arrested around it and because I got a beer bottle broken over my face. Yeah. No, no. You're going to also tell the story because you're a writer. Tell it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:53 And I'm the one who runs the show. Yeah. And in running. this show, we've created a wonderful journalistic character that represents the University of Miami artfully and with his heart at all times. And we do a national thing that annoys people plenty with all our Miami since ESPN Deportes. And now I am happy for everything that's happening around the program. And I said a word yesterday, reputationally, a word, a single word is what I said to you, that Mario Cristobal reputationally is not trusted in the big games, and that set you off.
Starting point is 00:12:33 Yeah, because it's just not true. He's 7-0 against top 25 teams, and that is indisputable. Yeah, big games show up. But what's also not disputable is they've never won the ACC or played in its championship game. And so the big games are few and far between, and so when you lose double-digit underdogs, it's not unfair to say that before this recent run, he was reputational criticized as someone who would not win these games. Parson, none of those games actually close at double digits.
Starting point is 00:13:00 I hear you. They were a Louisville double-digit favorite. Right, but the reputation is they don't show up for these games. These are one-score losses. Yeah, no, I think that's the part where I think there's confusion about. We talked about that yesterday, all right? It's fine. Here's where I want to get it.
Starting point is 00:13:19 I understand what you're doing. I understand especially during some lean years how my character could be grading and how my passion needed to have people to bump up against. Go on. When it comes to the Miami Heat, though, that doesn't really exist. When it comes to the Florida Panthers, though, that doesn't really exist. So Miami Hurricanes fans are sitting back and watching our show over the years, and especially during this run, and are asking themselves,
Starting point is 00:13:43 does Dan just need a Pat Riley fortune cookie wrapped around this story to cape up for his town? Because why? Is it so outsized that we have to have so many dissenting opinions when this is such a great story for this community and Dan is supposed to be the Miami guy and he actually went to the school. But who disputes any of what you're saying and how is that not being conveyed by the show through you? How is that not obvious in terms of bursts of great hurricane coverage that they can get not just here, but with the own business that you started because you want to do it differently and you want to be over there actually analyzing for two straight hours, the guard play?
Starting point is 00:14:20 I would guess because they want 100% buy-in on this show. I think they, Look, our show meets a moment when the team is in the championship games, right? Like, this is, people come here from all over the world to hear bias Miami coverage because we are a Miami show. And for whatever reason when it comes to this program and it's irrefutable because I have felt it, because I am often alone when I am touting the Miami Hurricanes, this show has an outsized representation of dissenting opinions when it comes to this program. and I understand why, and I understand why I in particular need a dilution. I don't understand why we need that dilution right now. Guys, let me tell you something.
Starting point is 00:15:01 One of the greatest joys of my life was when they finally opened the White Castle in my neighborhood in Phoenix, Arizona. I lost my mind because I'm so used to eating White Castle at home when I was in New York. Now I can have it all the time in Phoenix. But when I come to Miami, there's no White Castle. So you know what I do? Go to the freezer aisle because right there, they got the variety pack with all the great White Castle flavor in there. You're getting a lot of slider styles.
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Starting point is 00:18:31 Sweep steak starts 1215, 2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern and ends 1.23, 2026 at 11.59.59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website. Dan Lebatard. The judge coach, sweetie. Stugats. I should say hello.
Starting point is 00:18:43 This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats. I have a theory. I have a theory. Why Dan is... I think what you're saying makes sense. And why Dan is like that with the canes, as opposed to not like that when the heater in the finals or the Panthers or winning the Stanley Cup, is it because you actually have a legitimate tie to the school? And maybe you don't want to come off as, like, you want to actually be fair because you legitimately have a tie to the school as opposed to have an, you never play with my heat.
Starting point is 00:19:29 Well, thank you, Zaz. I am attempting ostensibly to be fair. Objective is funny because it's an illusion. Now? But did you know, but did you not hear Nick Wright yesterday? Were you guys not listening when Nick Wright did what he did with the J, capital J, wherever it is that he accused me of just sort of not being you anymore? Right. Are you just overcompensating because you cannot deny that it is different when it comes to this program? Mike, I'm simply to our national and regional audience. I am simply also trying to give voice to whatever other side there is here in the name of fairness while everyone who's listening to this, knows I love the school. Right, but you don't do that to the other teams. You don't.
Starting point is 00:20:10 When they are in this spot, you don't. Ask Jeremy how do the heat feel about this show? I don't know how the heat feel. I know as the one person. Like, I'm hearing everything Mike is saying and saying, yes, yes, yes, on the heat side. Recently. Because this entire show for the last three years has been an anti-heat show.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Recently. It's fair. Look, look, we're trying to call them a little bit like we see them. I'm not asking for 100% raw, ra homerism. I don't think that's ever been the case. We've always had someone on the show that is either anti the local team or at least speaks for that section of the audience. I'm just saying, like the pro-Miamy stuff is not a majority opinion on this show and hasn't been since probably it started. And that is the perception of the fans. You may feel differently.
Starting point is 00:20:57 I'm just telling you how it is because I'm out here in these streets, Dan. Yeah, you've mentioned that. You have those street credentials. And I urge everyone who's listening to this, who want an evolution of all of this coverage. And I've heard what Mike is doing. And it's daily. And I shouldn't give him all the credit because there are a lot of people working on it. But if you want a content factory
Starting point is 00:21:18 where every day you're getting reported stuff and different perspectives and instantaneously because Zaz, I don't know if you've noticed this, but the whole machine is moving a lot faster now. So places like doing what Mike is doing right now that are news information. places that are independent and alive every day, especially during this time. People are snorting all of this coverage. Yeah. No, absolutely. You told me how much content you guys
Starting point is 00:21:44 are putting out with Keynes Insight, like how much content per day? I couldn't believe it, man. Yeah, I think that that as the world gets smaller, as people get a little bit more detached, I do think that there's going to be a huge migration to local, to feel a sense of community around stuff. And when I was in college station... Even when we're not playing in a championship game. Yeah, even so. Because there is a sense of community. People may have their opinions about what Miami's community is in Coral Gables.
Starting point is 00:22:18 It's not, you know, Happy Valley or College Station. But when I went to College Station, TechSags is this amazing content machine. What they do is aspirational. They have this huge three-story studio right across the street from Kyle Field. And you realize there's an economy here and people are star for it when your team is making a run like this, or even when you're upset with your team, people want to turn to stuff. So I'm really proud of the stuff that DeMoney, Peter Arees, and everybody that's ever helped us along the way is pumping out at Keynes Insight right now.
Starting point is 00:22:44 Got in at a good time. Thankfully, the program trajectory is going the way that it is, but we cover everything. Transfer portal. We break news. Miami Hurricanes Basketball head coaching news. We broke that. We have as good as sources as anybody in the industry when it comes to cover in this team. We're really plugged in and we're pumping out content on the daily.
Starting point is 00:23:01 So thank you for the opportunity to plug it. Please. You're on YouTube right now watching us. Official Cain's Insight, cost you nothing to subscribe and support what we're doing. Look at Tony. He is soaked in Latino. I recognize the furniture in there. You know I recognize the pastelitos.
Starting point is 00:23:19 That is, you right now, it can be said, are at the very epicenter, at the heart, the pulse, that very seat of Miami. Yeah, Dan, hello. Welcome. Good morning. Right here, I'm at Party Cake. bakery right here on La Cayao I have La Caza Lo Truco literally I can throw a baseball
Starting point is 00:23:39 right to La Casa de la Cirola de Truco right across the street I'm very partial See you hold on let's see if I can get it There we go right there there's Casal Otrue Try to throw baseball there for okay no no look Tony I don't have a baseball with me but if I Tony if I could I would Tony please don't throw a fake baseball like he did at FIU
Starting point is 00:23:55 Tony we missed an opportunity yesterday To have the Columbus coach Analy's quarterback throw without a football Let's just go back next week on the way home home, I was like, shitty job by me. No, let's do it next week. It's fine. Look, this show's moving fast this week.
Starting point is 00:24:10 There's a lot going on. So we just skip past the national, and I'm guessing international news, that Fernando Mendoza's high school coach called him publicly a dork yesterday, like a nerd. The beef in the Cuban community has escalated to that where we stirred controversy we didn't have time for. I mean, Dan, to be honest, like I didn't feed him the dork line. I know Jeremy said did Tony feed him that line like I did not. We were standing a couple paces apart from each other.
Starting point is 00:24:38 Just, you know, he knows ball. He understands a dork when he sees one, which is fine. I love Frinandino Mendoza. Like, again, he could be my cousin. He could be my brother. I love the kid. But when you start talking about the stoics during the press conference, I know, hey, you took a couple too many philosophy classes at Columbus,
Starting point is 00:24:53 which is fine. Again, no, no shade. But I just know what the deal is. Tony, I have wanted all week for you to pop up somewhere and buy everybody breakfast. Is there a way right now that we can tell people where you're going to be tomorrow? Do we have a plan for tomorrow so that we can buy Miami breakfast on the corner of somewhere in Miami tomorrow, please? Absolutely, Dan. I'm going to be boots on the ground at Coral Gables.
Starting point is 00:25:22 I'm going to be on campus at the university. They're allowing us on campus somehow. Location is still TBD. location is still TBD, but we will be on campus tomorrow. Maybe we bring some colaita, we'll bring some batelito, some croquetica, and start passing them out. But how about right now where you are? Look, here's the thing, Tony.
Starting point is 00:25:38 Here's the thing. You want me to buy this guy breakfast? No, I want to, I want you guys, I want you guys to have a plan of buying everybody a breakfast in Miami at some point. Maybe we'll do it Monday. You have the budget for that? That's, damn, that's going to cost like $16. I know.
Starting point is 00:25:53 That's why I want to throw a big party. That's why I want to throw a big party Panko man tequila Do you have any there? Are you dipping it in Café con leche? What are you doing? Right now, right now I'm just drinking a cortadito which is basically a mini cafe with lece
Starting point is 00:26:08 It's called cortadito There's a truck going backwards on the road here I don't know if that's legal but There's a bunch of If you look over my shoulder here I don't know if you guys can see this Over my shoulder right around here There's like about 150 Barre de Pan
Starting point is 00:26:25 right there on the on the rack back there so they are getting your mouth was watering yes we called otada yes yeah yeah yeah once we hang up once we hang up here together well i'm gonna go have a breakfast uh so zaslo where are you on cuban coffee uh tre wingo uh you guys okay so but everyone knows the story around here it is legendary tre wingo's career ended when he came down to south florida got addicted to cafito and he was never the same after that and he couldn't stop talking about it so it isn't it isn't normal coffee it is spiked with it's laced with it's laced with with 80s Miami cocaine. My father tells a story of when he first moved down here back in the early 80s,
Starting point is 00:27:00 and he had Cuban coffee for the very first time. He thought he was having a heart attack. They called the ambulance. The hospital came to his work. They started strapping the deals on his chest, and they saw the empty cup of Cuban coffee on his desk. And they said, did you just drink all of that? He said, yes.
Starting point is 00:27:17 They immediately took all the patches off and went home. All the deals, they took off. That is unbelievable. True story. That's what a minute. You're not supposed to have the entire thing. Yeah. That's why they give you the thimble.
Starting point is 00:27:28 He didn't know. He's not supposed to have the entire thing. He loves telling that story. Wait a minute. He almost overdosed. So hold on. So you're telling me there's a visual somewhere of a family relative of yours. The paramedics arriving.
Starting point is 00:27:45 My father. I know, but there are other people here. Oh, yeah, yeah. What I'm saying is at the center of your family, you're having an incident. in which your father's had too much coffeeito passed out and ever... It was at work. He's sitting behind a desk.
Starting point is 00:28:01 The co-workers called the ambulance. His heart rate got so high. He thought he was having a heart attack. They're there. They put the, you know, they're strapping the deals on his chest, you know? They got the shirt open. What are the deals? You know, the heart monitors.
Starting point is 00:28:14 So they could see if you're having a heart attack, you know? So they're strapping the deals on his chest. He's got his shirt open. The chest is out, that very manly Zaslo chest hair. And as they're, you know, monitoring. one of the, you know, paramedics, sees the empty cup of Cappasito and says, did you just drink that? He says, yes,
Starting point is 00:28:30 and they didn't even say anything. They just started unstrapping everything, they went home. I'm telling you that's a skit. That's a skit for all time on Saba Lohigante. Someone like Zaz's dad thinking he overdosed on coffee and disgusted Latin... New Yorker who just moved to Miami. You didn't know.
Starting point is 00:28:46 But disgusted Latin paramedics throwing down their equipment because, oh, we've got another one of these in Miami, another Trey Wingo, who can't handle his coffee. Yeah. True story. That's an unbelievable story.
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Starting point is 00:30:16 Don Lebertard. To us, residents? Oh, wow. That's pretty good. It's in there. Better. I think I haven't been practicing? Stugats.
Starting point is 00:30:25 Oh, oh. I didn't realize we had a substitute complicated legacy. Brought you by headquarters Toyota, huh? 441 in Powerline Road. Second out of nine. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. Yes, Tony, let's buy some breakfast for people. And I, I, you, how many times to somebody?
Starting point is 00:30:54 Three times. How many times? Go interview the person. who's dropping things. Get us to the interview. Ask how common that is for somebody to drop three things in a 90-second hit. Go do the interview. No, nobody's dropping anything, Dan. No, hold on. Dan, nobody's dropping anything. What had happened was that's when you grind the coffee and when you actually make the coffee, you hit La Casuala. And that's what that is. I know you've probably never been to a Cuban bakery in the last 30 years. That's my ignorance showing right there.
Starting point is 00:31:22 How embarrassing. Come over here. Let's work on the garbage case. How embarrassing. How embarrassing. No, it really is embarrassing. It really is embarrassing. Dan's like trying to create these things, and I'm like, oh, no, dude, that happens 18,000 times a second here. Come over. Watch.
Starting point is 00:31:38 See, so if you look at what she's got going on right here, right? That's where the cafeteria, that's what she's hitting right here to knock out all the cafe that's already been made. So that's when you hear, bam, bam, bam, it gets hit right there. So can we sit around and get that? Can we sit here and get it until we get the coffee? the live moment of a very, so that everyone can see how Cuban coffee is made that ruins Trey Wingo's career. I want to build that way.
Starting point is 00:32:03 I want people to be able to sell coffee that, you guys don't. I wonder how Trey feels about this. Yeah, you think he thinks his career was ruined her. I think he's still working. I follow. Did a lot of great stuff for Draft Kings. I'll tell you that much. I'm sorry, was that cruel?
Starting point is 00:32:21 I'm simply a little bit. I don't, that he got addicted to coffee? No, the other part. The ruining of his career. But it makes the story better. I thought that's the joke we were all in on. No, it's insulting. You don't have the greatest of radars. Also, Dave Dunn isn't Cuban. We tried to tell you repeatedly. Yesterday. He said he was a bringo.
Starting point is 00:32:42 Hey, Dave Dunn, what's your favorite Cuban dish? You insisted. No, I had to help on that one because he said, what does this mean for Cuban, Miami? Which, of course, the guy does not know anything because he came here like five years ago. He's David Dunn. At least drew me al-up of what's your favorite dish where he can at least throw croquetas in there, go on you. He's a good job.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Sometimes writers know the story they're going to tell. I'm trying to repair the relationship that Dan has with Miami right now because Dan is just uniquely Miami Beach and he lives in that silo, which is beautiful. I love that for me. But when we come over here on this side of them, Carter, things are different. It sounds like an insult.
Starting point is 00:33:18 It's what the streets are saying. It's not an insult. It's what the streets are saying. I love Dan like a father figure. We're out here helping. We're boosting. Miami credentials. I'm trying. I'm literally trying. You didn't know that the pamp, pump, pomm was a cafe. Damn. Even I do that.
Starting point is 00:33:33 Dude. And let's not, if we have to revisit it, his dad was an embarrassing. Oh my God. An embarrassment. Forgot about Fidel and forgot about Elion. This is how you guys. And the cookies. It almost makes me retroactively offended by all the stuff he did on HQ. Oh, you should be. That was rampant exploitation. So the man at Disney could have a Latin accent because mine wasn't because I'm lebitard I said Dan lebitard is over here with Jeremy Tashay in the Americanized version of the Cuban we need to go get at least I knew what that sound was we need to go get the cartoon accent let's get
Starting point is 00:34:09 that let's read daddy's voice Tony behind the counter Tony you work there now behind the counter here Tony I mean I'm basically almost part owner of this place Tony I love the freedom you have and the trust you have in that kitchen let's tour let's let's there's The pan with the pan with the Mantequilla. That's the good stuff. All you got to do is throw it on the grill. It hits the grill right there. Beautiful.
Starting point is 00:34:32 Bown to that. What we have here? What we have? They hate cameras. We have to be here. Pastelita of Guayava. No, Guayana no. Oh, that's my favorite.
Starting point is 00:34:45 And yet are meat patties. Guaya and cheese. Spinaca that we have. And the cocoa there. Ah, a pastel of cocoa. I'm gonna be here, that's riquisimo. You go to go out of the party cake that's in the 128,
Starting point is 00:35:00 the time of my airport. You're to go to here. And pan francis, they got all kind of bread here, Dan. Are you a bread chaser? Because they have them right here, dude. Well, that's the good stuff, right? If we're gonna dip anything in coffee,
Starting point is 00:35:13 that soaked in butter, that's the Cuban experience. It's good stuff. Is it breaking down Elijah Surrett versus O.J. Frederick, probably not, but it's something. Kane's insight. I mean, you can get that wherever.
Starting point is 00:35:24 Yeah, you can get that with D Money over there. But D Money's not going to break down Bancel Monte Gia because he's vegan. No, I love this. Tony's got run in the kitchen. People don't like cameras. Tony, no, Tony, how about this? Tony, Tony, tell me this. If you had to guess, how many people there speak English?
Starting point is 00:35:45 This is more of a tourist location. So I'd say maybe half of the people here speak English. Because this one's on Coyotos. There's a lot of tourists walk about. But there's one. There's one that's on Miller and La Noentido. That one does not have any people that speak English because I went to that one on Saturday. After I played basketball, I get some croqueticas and zapatelitos and those people would also let you just walk into the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:36:05 But those people would also let you walk into their kitchen and just wander around. Easily, easily, easily. Obviously, it's harder for me to do it with the. Alo, Lucy. Look at this. Lo Juzzi. What we're here? Now the guys just showing off.
Starting point is 00:36:23 Ah, seigneuritas, are rich. This is the mass of my loja with cream pastelera. And she put the covertura chocolate. There we have the diksuitas. Ask her if she thinks the canes are going to win. Yeah, that's a prediction. Thank you. Ask if she thinks the canes are going to win.
Starting point is 00:36:41 What do you think of the hurricanes that are now in the, or excuse me, the Monday? Well, I hope that I can. There we go. She thinks we're going to win. I with a hurricane sweater. Cain's my 50. And she also says that Mark Fletcher is exceptional
Starting point is 00:36:58 of picking up the blitz. Oh my God. The rose is giving me roguadigas here. What other advantages does Miami have? What other advantages does Miami have? No, I was talking to my... We got to exploit number 67 that right tackle. Oh, she said...
Starting point is 00:37:14 She said strong D-line play. That's what I said. It's lining up Mesedora and Bain on the same right side. That's what it is. And you count on the development of Marquis Lightfoot on the other. side to collapse that pocket. Make Mendoza. Hold on to the ball. He is prone to mistakes. This is a guy that can turn the ball over, Dan. Tony, can you tell me what I have to do to repair my relationship
Starting point is 00:37:34 with Miami? You guys have been trying to help me for a couple of days. You told me, Dan, you're not welcome over at Columbus. They're not about what you're about. And I was blind to it. I'm like, what do you mean they're not about it? I'm like, Dan, stop being ignorant. Their politics and your politics, they don't combine. But I'm like, no, I'm just doing a sports show over here, right? We're on the same joke? No, no. No. Yeah, no, we are. And again, I'm trying to get, I'm trying to get around to all the different places that people would be boots on the ground
Starting point is 00:38:03 where regular people would be. And obviously, we call George Sedano Hollywood. Dan's a bit Hollywood himself, right? He's got a little bit of a bubble of Hollywood people that he hangs around. He's not really in these streets. He's not on Coral Way, Ilano Ventido. He's not here at Party Cake Bakery on Caya Ocho. He's not here.
Starting point is 00:38:21 And like, there's no, there's no very. souvenir that Dan could put on to be more Miami if he's not actually in the streets. It's been 30 years since he's been in a bar fight with a beer bottle of Bird Road. That was tough. Again, I love you like a father figure, Dan. Watch out of him gladys. I love you like a father figure, Dan, but like, damn, we got to get you out of these streets, dude. We do.
Starting point is 00:38:44 We're trying to repair your reputation in your hometown. I can't believe it's come to this. It's worse than when Pelgram was happening. That can't be. It is worse. That, Mike, that... Hoping a Discord, pal. Show them all the birds over here.
Starting point is 00:38:57 That cannot be true. I'm telling you your brand. Your brand amongst Keynes fans. That's a rooster. Toxic brand. Look at this guyo. Look at this guyo. Here's Rico.
Starting point is 00:39:09 Miro. They're locked in. These are real, these are real roosters. Mm-hmm. Look at them all across the street. Ask him about Sarad versus Fred Rake. She doesn't know those... Yeah, there you go.
Starting point is 00:39:20 Get Rose to chase the roosters. Rose, you're there to do. She doesn't know that some of these roosters are... Rose, you're there to document the television, not to make the news. We cannot... We need to go into the environments and allow the things to be as they are. We are in the wild, and we can't just be making television out there. Tony, we'll check in with you in a second. Just real quick, before I let you go, though.
Starting point is 00:39:44 Thank you. Chris, are you aware of what La Casa de los Trucos is? Because I have been there within the last 18 months. This will not surprise you guys. Surprises nobody. I am aware, but tell Zaz. No, so you're not aware. Okay, so just Tony, real quick, tell people.
Starting point is 00:40:01 I know you did a Tony's tonight on one of these. No, that is a rooster. That's not a sound effect. Chris isn't doing that. He's not that good. He doesn't like that I'm in his turf right now. No, he doesn't. He's right down there.
Starting point is 00:40:13 He's in the bushes right there. He doesn't like that I'm on his turf. Let's size him up. Look at this guy. This guy's a little dirty here. Size him up. Let's see what kind of agility is. This guy's a little dirty over here to the right.
Starting point is 00:40:21 All right, get out of there. Leave them alone. He's got good agility. It's their environment, not yours. Yeah, we're scouting. But go ahead and explain La Casa de los Trucos, and then I'm going to send you over there because I need a report from over there. Okay, yeah, Casa Los Trucos is basically like, imagine, like, the original party city, right?
Starting point is 00:40:38 They had every costume, every sort of like gag gift. No wonder Dan likes it. There's actually like an old witch. There's an old witch as the, as the mascot with the long nose. No, no, no, no, not at all. Not at all. Not all. This is not,
Starting point is 00:40:52 thank you. This is a Halloween store. This is a Halloween store. This is not a sex store. This is a Halloween store. No, no, no, no. I mean, maybe if you ask the right people,
Starting point is 00:41:01 there may be something in the back that could, you know, that could equate for that. But right now, it is probably the oldest costume store in Miami, at least. I don't know if any place older
Starting point is 00:41:12 than Casa Lothruco. All right, let's go get the history over there. Getting the rooster a lot of Mike. All right, get out of here. Bring the rooster with you. Hold on. Let's see how many, we got one, two, three, four, five, six. We had seven roosters just kind of hanging out here.
Starting point is 00:41:27 Look, more over there. Look, across the street. Rose. Rose, look, there are roosters across the street. Devozsche. Benpaca. Benpaca. These are fighting roosters.
Starting point is 00:41:39 Why did they cross the road? Rose is so interesting. Exactly right. Exactly right. That's what I was about to say, Mike. She doesn't know that about probably 60% of these roosters have hands and will peck. Claus, get out of there. They're talents.
Starting point is 00:41:51 I saw one with claws. Yeah. Half of them got raised a little. They all have cloth. Look, man, those birds have been protecting that area of a store that's got a great dumpster because there's Montagia and Bong back there. That's their family. Get out of their neighborhood. That's a bad neighborhood.
Starting point is 00:42:06 Get out of there. Bad bird neighborhood. It's a bad, it's a bad Miami neighborhood. Get out of there. Go across the street. The Lacasal Trucles. Leave the birds alone. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:42:16 I will continue to get advice for you. because I am guilty as charged on where it is that you guys are accusing me of more unpopularity than when the Pell Grant stuff was happening, which I did not report. When you tell me that, I am guilty as charged on a bubble because I have totally checked out of social media in a way that has helped my head because the last time all of this happened to me, years ago. I mean, you guys laugh at a beer bottle of the chin. That's funny. No, it was terrifying. It was in my 20s and the University of Emmy programs fans hated me because I was doing journalism around the school. So it was kind of a hard thing. It was a hard time. Like,
Starting point is 00:43:02 I got battered in my 20s when I wasn't old enough to know what was happening to me. You got to get back on social media. That's some wild stuff going on. Yeah, dude. So I am blissfully unaware of what it is that's happening with me reputationally that I would be seen as somehow. You think I'm nationally seen as anti-Miamy hurricanes? I think our show is largely that like we've got me as like window dressing. Stunner. I'm telling you man. Consider me stunned. I'll show you my algorithm. There's some stuff happening. Consider me stunned. You are absolutely right then. Bubble as charged. Like I was blissfully unaware until now that that would, however it is that we've been doing the show would risk any kind of unpopularity when everyone knows
Starting point is 00:43:48 everyone nationally has been presented a figure in me who has always been pro-Miamy and nowhere outside of this market would I have a reputation that would be seen by anybody as anti-Maiami. It would only and could only be in this market. It's sad. Sad to see what's become of you. Conversely, though, I am right and high. People love me in the streets. Happy New Year, Everybody, 2026 is already getting off to an incredible start because you want to know how I rang in the new year? It was with a bunch of friends in a Dallas hotel lobby bar ordering a bunch of Miller Lights because that's how you do it.
Starting point is 00:44:24 That's how you make special memories. Miller Light has been by my side and many special football memories this year. And hopefully we get to write a few more memories with Miller Light. Some of my most legendary moments have started that exact same way. A buddy's house, a lobby bar, a game, no big plan. And then you crack open a Miller Light. You take a sip and you look around and you immediately. recognized that you made the right call.
Starting point is 00:44:49 Legendary moments start with Miller Lite. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller Lite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96
Starting point is 00:45:04 calories, and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

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