The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Darla, The Cool-Ass Dog (feat. Dominican Blade)

Episode Date: December 19, 2025

"Hips, booty, and a thumb in the butt." It's time for the Fake Pregame Show ahead of the Miami Hurricanes' biggest game in 20 years, but Dan has never been less prepared for a show in his life. It's time to talk about Dan's intimate moments at the holiday party and the unseemly texts he sent Chris and Jeremy beforehand. We also get to Trysta's inappropriate plus-one, JuJu and Tony's intro-video related snitching, snipers sniping, and Greg Cote's beer filtration system. Today's cast: Dan, White Tamara's husband, Chris, Amin, JuJu, Ollie's Mom, Roy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

All right, kicking things off with Smyranoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number of vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smyranoff! Wow, you're on the money with Smyranoff. Chris, you know what goes great with Smyranoff? Yes, but I'm really talking about game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe. Smearnoff!

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Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right? Don't place parlays on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is one when it hasn't hit triple zero. Always drink your Yeagermeister ice cold That's the rule Everything else is merely a suggestion Everything else? Everything else

Wearing clean underwear every day Well that's just a personal decision Brushing your teeth Obviously smart but not a rule Never pee on an electric fence Okay maybe there are two rules But the one that is 100% That I insist on completely

Yeagermeister must be drank ice cold Or don't drink it at all Damn that's cold Exactly you're finally starting to get it Drink responsibly. Yeagermeister liqueur, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mass Yeagermeister U.S. White Plains, New York. When you're flying Emirates business class,

relaxing in an exclusive airport lounge, you'll see that your vacation isn't really over until your flight is over. Fly Emirates, fly better. I am embarrassed to say I have stumbled to the finish line on our work year, the company party blew out both of my tires. This is the least prepared I've ever been for a show that we have done

because the company party careened into the ocean and I'm just getting here to do this show after the single greatest football game ever played. And it was on the back in the televisions and I was talking to Tristan and her dog. Yeah. You seem pretty into it. Yeah.

The dog does not belong at the company. party when you've been here two days. Everyone got a plus one. I mean, is scared of dogs? Scared, I'm not scared. He was pretty frightened. He was the only one, though. The thing that made me feel like it was a good choice

is that I've got, I don't know anyone. This is, like you said, two days. And I've got bad social anxiety and I'm a little bit of a close talker, which is why Ollie is a service dog. And everybody was touching Ollie, and they were getting into my personal space.

felt like it created a lot of intimacy at a place where you know a lot about intimacy as well, Dan, you had your hands all over, booties and hips. It was a lot of various, your wife. Krista's voice is, Thank you for the correct. Crawling, crawling to that finish line. It's like, ugh.

Amin did Vegas and then stumbled into this, stumbled sideways, and Valerie asked me, was Amin drunk? And I'm like, was the bar open? Nobody could tell I'll tell you right now Also this was light work Compared to what I did in Vegas

You know why? Because I didn't lose $17 million on a slot machine You want to talk about putting in work last night Greg Cody in all time Oh yeah I don't know he must have slipped a Twinkie or something Maybe even like I'm telling you Every time I saw a service person walking by

With drinks they had a Miller light there Chris I talked about this with your mother He had a system It was impressive This is what the system was He would order a drink from one server, then he'd order a drink from another server, and it's like cascading. And so he'd always have a beer coming to him. And my favorite part was when he got caught in his system with a full beer and another beer arrives.

He's like, I didn't order that. At one point, there was three. At one point, I saw three beers in his area. I learned last night. I'm not kidding here, okay? I don't know. Maybe we'll spend the whole show on the company Christmas party. I learned something last night that I did not know, okay?

Tony thinks he's the sniper in the company. There is somebody who works for us. The person they're married to is an actual sniper. That's sick. Who is it? Jesus. Yeah. I thought you were talking about how Frankie was dressed.

He was a Mexican blade. That's a different story. For sure. Do we have pictures of Frankie? I have a picture. I'll put it up. I love Frankie so much. Frankie would kill anybody who walked through these doors.

We are so safe here because of Frank. Especially if they're a vampire. Let's start the show a year and review. Turning over, turning over. We're on the old and bringing the new. Turning over. Our days are back, jacked, drop a new track, here with their audio almanac.

We said bye-bye Billy, and that was whacked. When will Stu come back? You know about that Thai food lifts my mood? Zaslow is a wild dude. Nice hat, s'all I got the scope. Salute ju-choo got you with the alley-oo. What's the worst part of the life? Will Fork has got a new wife.

Roy Pelham he loves to talk pock. When Christmas is up, he says, fuck. Does Craig have a back in my day? No. The traffic just cut in his way. And then he says you never know Confirm it, you don't get the show!

Let's start the show are you in with you Turning over, turn it over We've got Pablo vocal modulating A mean's been weak and observating Connor McDeeze McGover rating again The Panthers took that ass So let's give it to Dan because his name's on the show And hand it to Mike because he happened to know

Now pass me the ball like Stafford Napuka Please not be done and happy Chinooka Let's start the show a year and with you. Turning over, turning over. Here on the old and ringing the new. Turning over, turning over. Fake pregame show. Yeah.

University of Miami. So did we. Texas A&M. No. Biggest game in 20 years. Oh, ho. Hello. Head to head is always the number one criteria for anything.

How does it rub you? Are you shitting me? Fake breakram show. So did we. I need your support. Golden State. Gold, Georgia Tech Yellow Jack. No.

Fake pregame show Six, seven Pre-game in it Head to head So did we University of Miami Milwaukee Biggest game in 20 years

That kind of thing Zazlo Do you remember the fake pregame show? I love hearing that so much I mean obviously it's not the same voice But just going back and thinking And remembering I told you

It's one of my favorite things to do here is to reminisce about the old days. Of course I remember fake pregame show. For the uninitiated, the reason I bring it up is because I asked Chris Cody to make a bigger open than the greatest of the biggest opens for what we used to do, which is the fake pregame show on Sunday mornings

with a giant voice we'd interview a kicker and just make a mess of Sunday mornings and what... Tony, do you have any access to the fake pregame show? Was that before your time? No, no, I remember the fake pregame show. We were not the flagship of the Dolphins. I think we became the flagship of the Dolphins in our second year on air, 790 a ticket. But of course, originally we were not the flagship, and they wanted to do a pregame show.

So they were the fake pregame show. Yeah, so anyways, you can probably find some stuff there that was good. And so I asked Chris, do something bigger because the UM is playing a giant game. This is the biggest game. I don't know when Texas A&M played a game this big. I know they had Johnny Mansell. I know they had the highest paid coach. I've never thought of Texas A&M in this terms, they play for the championship.

Mike has flown out. Golden Cain couldn't be bothered with the company party. Couldn't be bothered. Well, sat there for Secret Santa, but I couldn't blame him when I saw someone brought a rotisserie chicken. Like, that seemed wildly inappropriate to me. Secret Santa. Oh, yeah, you weren't here for it. I wasn't here.

Yeah, what's your hijinks going on there? Fake gifts. Roy, you weren't there. What are you shocked by Roy? Roy, somebody out there, somebody thought it was appropriate at the. Secret Santa bonding party to give somebody as a gift thoughtlessly a rotissory chicken. Our director Jason ended up with it. You know about that public's rotisserie chicken?

You know about that? Oh, I love it. Was it the Marty Grail flavor? Excellent. You know about that Marty Grail flavor? Lemon pepper. Room temp. Put it on the poll at Levitard show.

Is it a rotissory chicken an appropriate secret Santa gift? And the rotissory chicken, Tony, it was sitting under the tree for four hours before it was open. That's the other thing. So somebody had Simpena, okay, brought in a rotissory chicken. and then we're just like, yeah, I'm just going to drop this right here. We didn't smell it when it came in? We did not. I got a medium dolphins hoodie.

Well, wait a minute. So wait a minute. The way that happened. That was gross, Dan. All right, look. That was gross. Look. Yeah, that's right, Gabe.

Okay, we can talk. You guys make an executive decision here. Do we talk Secret Santa, awkwardness of company party, or the biggest game you am in Texas A&M have played in 20 years? Secret Santa. Office party. Or how drunk my dad was during that imaging I played. Sam Darno.

That was great. Sam Darno. And that's a good one, Juju. We saw a part of the game behind us because I'm talking to Amin and he's just blowing gas in my face at the company party open bar. Gas? Hogfers. And someone accused him of putting a thumb in my butt and he said, you don't know where that thumb's been. That's, that was like 10 o'clock.

So hips, booty, and a thumb in the butt. That's crazy. You got goose? Well, someone, yeah, well, I did. Trista said hips and booty. I don't know where it came from. Something happened behind me. It felt like I was gooseed.

I turned around and Amin said, you don't know where this thumb. has been. That happened. I don't know how it happened. That was 10 p.m. That's before we careened into 4 a.m. What the holy shit? What did Sam Darnold do last night?

Juju, were you watching this game? Because all I was looking was for Parkinson catches. And then they threw, everyone else has a catch and he's got one for four yards. Right. I was locked in. Thursday, Thunder, took a big poop last night. But the game was too phenomenal to be mad at it, man.

Like, somehow I came out of that game, more confident in the Rams moving forward. Those two teams could play a hundred times and all the games would look like the last two. And there's not a lot of difference between those teams except Sam Tarnold is going to throw a bunch of interceptions and maybe Seattle can overcome them. I wasn't watching the game. I had my back to the game and I'm looking at Tristan. I'm like, I don't think it's an appropriate. You have your hands on hips apparently.

I think I'm an ally. And I don't think it's appropriate for someone who's done two shows with us to bring the first dog to the company party when a means afraid of dogs. Not afraid of dogs. I was just trying to be a part of the culture, really. My wife literally said, she goes, who brought a dog when Trista walked in? See, everybody, the thing is, everybody after the fact is like, oh, you brought a dog? That's so weird. And everybody in the moment is like, oh, my God, who's this sweet little baby?

It's called being fake. Fraud. They're frauds, exactly. By the way, Dan, white Tamara, big hit at the party. Very nice, incredibly nice, actually introduced herself to me. Zazel didn't do it. I didn't like that, by the way. Charming adult.

Do you call her White Tamara? That's her name. You were surprised that Tamara was white? No, she, I guess Trista is. No, he called her White Tamara. That's what we call her. Yeah, he was like, hey, Juju, come meet White Tamara. I'm like, oh, what was that?

What's up, Sis? I'm sorry. I was confused and perhaps I should not have been by a handful of things in the awkwardness of Roy's not drinking for some reason. Roy's favorite thing is an open bar has been for as long as I've known him. I'm looking at him and he's like, I'm not drinking. And I'm like, what are we doing? Yeah, welcome to the last two years then. But he was a pro's pro.

He didn't have like a water. He had a mucktail. But he said it's not my choice. And I'm like, what? Do you have a drinking problem? He's like, no, I just, it's not my choice. I don't, I'm not allowed to drink anymore. No, we are trying to have another baby, so.

There you go, Dan. How do you feel? Is that a thing, though? That's how it happened, though. Yeah. You think that's not confusing to me? I'm like, open bar, this is Roy's, this is the height of all of those success. Oh, trust me, I know, Dan.

Can you not have alcohol in the swimmers? Yeah, you'll have to excuse my ignorance on this, but what's the relationship there? No, it's a thing. It lowers the count. Yeah, it lowers the count. Really? Certain things, lower the count. Even if you eat, like certain things, yeah.

Shit. The dog is barking outside. I got to point this out. I know we're not supposed to like lift the curtain or whatever. More like a yap. The dog is going nuts outside. Okay, so can we talk about this? Bring him on in.

Thank you. Come on, Ollie. Amin's afraid of dogs. Not afraid. Willow. Willow is going to be so bad that this dog's getting on air right now. I want now 30 seconds of honesty from you. Please.

What is your relationship with Jessica, Willow, that connection of, but you did not want Willow in the office. Well, I mean, yeah, first of all, Willow's massive. Massive dog, it's huge. Right, but to Willow's credit, I don't feel great about this dog being here either. I kind of feel like just, in a professional environment, we don't need pets, but the other thing is,

not a pet. Well, it's a dog. The other thing is I told Trista, I don't have a problem with dogs, as long as they're cool. There's one dog I know named Darla. Darla's cool, man. Darla be like, what's up, man?

What's up? And that's it, like, the problem is, most of these dogs are not cool as evidence, but a yapping outside the door. I mean, the time I know Darla. Like, we know who Darla is. Dollar's a dog.

Dollar's a cool-ass dog. That's what Darla is. Chris, do you have any more sound of your father? Your father, so you leave the Christmas party. Chris dressed for a holiday party. He formalized up. Zaz wasn't wearing his Roman Reigns gear. I thought about it. You should have. That would have been a great bit.

White camera said, no. I thought about it. That's as good as I've seen Zaslow look in any professional setting. He's radio. He doesn't dress like that. This is why I got into this. I, like, I, I want to, I want to wear my back-to-back Florida Panther Stanley Cup shirt like I'm wearing right now. That's why I got into this. I feel like Zaz just didn't wear his hat. That's why I got into this so that I would never have to dress up. That's right. He wore jeans at least,

which was nice. They were pants. No, those were pants. Oh, they were pants. Tone. Whatever, I wasn't paying attention. Tony, you're all about style. Zaz did it. My style, not his. Zaz did it up last night. And so did it, by the way quickly let's let's point out me frankie and i mean took an amazing picture last night and once we get willow off the screen here we'll throw frankie on who looked like dominican blade and it was a excellent yeah there it was an excellent outfit so if you can't see it because obviously there's the black on the shirt and the black on the vest is kind of tough to see he was wearing a vest only no shirt underneath with the blazer on top but then he had the hat ready to go

so a a plus effort from uh from frankie see Jeremy in the background yapping about the heat. It's a holiday season and the 50th anniversary of Miller Light. The holiday is all about spending time with friends and family, want you to sit back and toast a few Miller Lights. Make your holiday time, Tis

Miller Time. And with the 50th anniversary of Miller Light, you get to remember and reflect on all the good times that you had with your trusty buddy by your side, Miller Light. Brewed for flavor with simple ingredients like malted barley, rich, balanced toffee notes, and that iconic golden color. And at 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

It lets he enjoy the season without weighing you down. The original light beer since 1975 and still hit indifferent 50 years later. The best holiday beers are the ones you don't expect. Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tis Miller Time! Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories

and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Marty Supreme, Christmas Day, Marty Supreme, Christmas Day, Marty Supreme, Christmas Day, you know what I'm going to be doing on Christmas Day, and it's going to be watching Marty Supreme because I didn't even need to know that critics were calling Marty Supreme

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Quick break to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan Lebitard show Game Time The NFL regular season is already winding down And this is when the games get really good And tickets are in high demand Some of them really difficult to find So why don't you take the guesswork

How to buying NFL tickets with the game time map I use it all the time because it gives me the advantage. That's right. Sports fans, take the power back. It's the hack for grabbing amazing tickets in just a couple of taps. Super easy, super reliable. And with the game time guarantee, you're getting 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus, fees are included. What you see is what you pay. Do yourself a favor. Open up the game time app right now. You'll see tons of seats available, lower bowl, midfield, upper deck, and NFL tickets starting at around 100 bucks. Pick what you want. Tap, tap, done. Take the guesswork at a buying NFL tickets. with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code Dan for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply again. Create an account and redeem code D-A-N for $20

off. Swipe, tap, ticket, go. Download the GameTime app today. Don Lebertard. In terms of heat fans, you're the most irrational of us right now. What's the pivot? Oh, irrational. Stugats. Do you not hear your voice there?

Your voice, if I were making a cartoon thing that was meant to symbolize irrational. That's the voice I would give. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. Tudra, can you help me with something? Because I'm having some difficulty with my birthday weekend and sort of what's appropriate. So if we were to throw the funniest version of that

ringside tomorrow next to you. Tonight? Or tonight, excuse me. I'm sorry, the fight is tonight. would be the right amount of people to send ringside or close to ringside, wherever it is the tickets are that Chris can get for tonight's

Jake Paul fight. How many tickets should we buy to the fight and who should get those tickets for us to represent that fight correctly? Damn, that's a lot of responsibility for the kid, but I mean, I'm going to just go ahead and put my name in the hat

just because, you know, ringside the kid, you know? Can I say that I've heard from sources close to that arena that if we arrive there with a spaghetti bag, things will happen, it will be shown. Like, we've talked with people. I heard that rumor too. We've talked with people in the video room at that building,

and they said, hey. But why aren't you doing it? I can't tonight. Who's going to do it? I can't if you need me. Now, that's ridiculous. We need a fat person to do it. It's got to be either me or him.

Well, there you go. Let me tell you something. This was strategic where yesterday I asked Dan what time the main event is going to be. and I think he said 1 a.m., I'm so effing out. Maybe we send stunt, Dan, and people will think it's you. Just throwing ideas, seeing what sticks. I just want to point out right now that while, yes, we do have sources inside the building, and yes, I do believe their ability to get us on the broadcast.

I think it's just adorable that Zaz thinks. They're going to hold it for the main event. At 1 a.m., that's when they're going to show you guys. You don't have to be there for that. You just got to be there early enough for them to show it during the boring times where they just show random people in the crowd. You don't think they would take time away from Anthony Joshua, Jake Paul, to show me eating spaghetti out of a bag?

You know what? With a fork and spoon, by the way. You know what? I stand corrected. I think that we should, I really want somebody to explain what the lameness of this content opportunity is. The question is because Metal Arc would have to pay for these tickets, journalistically. What is the number of people to send there to simply get the lame viral moment?

of someone like Zaz eating a bag of spaghetti next to the stupidity of what this fight is. Like what, how lame is that as a content opportunity that all we're trying to do is sneak into the Netflix broadcast with nonsense because we want to look ridiculous and have Juju notarizing all of this ringside. You know, it's not going to be ridiculous. You just get some shirts made tonight, you feel me?

Metal art media.com or whatever we're promoting. Allupe Show.com. You have a website? Come on. eat the spaghetti, now we got pretty much prime real estate in promo. Could we get Trista's dog in the building? Do you think we have... Yeah, we could.

I bet you we could. Service animal, we write a letter. Service, I already have a letter. I think, Dan, you'd have to be there for that. Yeah. Just put it in your pocket. No one's going to notice. I think, Dan, you'd have to be there for us to get the spaghetti in the Ziploc bag into the building.

I think I get the spaghetti in. I believe they have some sort of pasta station somewhere in that arena. Maybe we bring the Ziploc empty, Ziploc empty. And then we fill it up with their spaghetti? I'm just saying worst-case scenario. Wait a minute. You think they sell spaghetti? I believe that media dining, yeah.

At all fights, they got a nice media dining set up. Last time I went to Vegas, they had an entire thing of... Even for the fans, I think there's a pasta station. You know what we should do is take Zaz. We make them do that shirt, Metal Arc Media, whatever, Zazl will show 2.0, whatever. But then as he's eating the spaghetti, he gets it on his hands and then he puts it on the shirt, white shirt. Zazz is out.

I don't want to talk about ideas. No, wait a minute. What's that guy doing? Guys, guys, I don't want to talk about ideas. Tell me something. we can actually do. Zaz is saying 1 a.m. He's saying 1 a.m. too rich for my blood. I got to get up at noon tomorrow to watch the hurricanes. That's a lot in 11 hours. I want to watch football and go to sleep tonight.

Jonathan Zazzle. Bad teammate. Yeah. You can say whatever you want. It's like Tony's saying no to the open. First off, I heard that. That was rich from a lot of people in here, by the way. A lot of people all the way down that way. I know that he was a part of it. So chose not to do it. He admitted that. This guy right. No, I know. I'm just saying my piece because I wasn't even to offend my Hold on. Hold on. We snitching now. Hold on. We're snitching now. You said it. I mean, we was in the courtroom pointing at each other now. This is a lot to digest, and we've got a big game to get to, and I do want to talk about the University of Miami and Texas A&M. However, Tony has been sitting on two days of fury. Just he's enraged by the entirety of the show's accusations against him. Can I go back for a second? I believe Yeti, who somehow was not. Not invited to the company party last night.

That was an oversight. Oh, well, you're careless. So the fact, I believe that Yeti has made a certified banger. I believe that that is a good song. I may not have judgment here because I'm 57 years old. So the musically astute among us would say what, please. Tony, Juju, I think you guys know. If I would have been a part of it, it would have been great.

Yeti made something sound Latin, yet he has no Latin in him. felt good as a song to me. I'm 57 years old. My taste has aged out, perhaps. I'm not good judge on this. I thought that was a good song. The fact that you guys refused to participate in it, uh, the accusation Tony is saying is not true. We're saying he's too, he didn't want his cool attached to what might have been a lame video. Do I have the accusation right, Juj? I think you have the accusation a little bit wrong about Tony. Me, I can just speak for myself, I do music in real life. And so you asking me to do a song that I don't necessarily feel or, you know, I think Rose did a great job. That's just not my expertise, that Latin

flair. So I called them, though. I ain't going to chatty, Kathy, and call for people and say, no, I call Yeti. I say, no, brother. Fair enough. Okay, and because I would see where. Tony worked in the shadows. The risk there for Ju-Ju, he's not going to notarize. shit music. So he's not going to, but that's not, that is no indictment of Yeti. What, Tony? No, what I was going to say is, I didn't work in the shadows. I actually gave others opportunity. Right?

If you start thinking about what I was... He's like, Ethan, you're doing this. I was like, Ethan, you know what, buddy? You know what would be really good for you? You being the Santa. That would be incredible. And then all of a sudden, Ethan does a great job of Santa. People don't even know what's Ethan. It's Ethan, by the way. On the hook, who could do it? Rose. I'm going to see the hook. How about you sing the hook? Kierston, the same thing, boom, you sing

the hook. All of a sudden, I'm, I'm an economy, Dan, I'm giving people businesses. DJ Collin. Thank you. Tony Collada, you. Good teammate. Thank you. I do have a response to all the things that were said.

Yes, I do want to give you. I want to give, wait a minute. What we did to Tony. What, okay. I feel like as a show, we put Tony in a bad spot because he had no way to defend himself for two days against the accusation. The Tony, who's been hustling for years around here, wouldn't want to try something artistically where he would get a shot. shot to star in a video, but director Jason did

say that you did not tell him that you weren't doing it until the very last day, which made him then rewrite the entirety of everything he was doing there because you bailed at the very last minute. That's fair. Okay, so the floor is yours. Well, okay, so Jason

was trying to make this video for three days. I'm being told he bailed the day of. No, no, I bailed the minute before. I was like, hey, we're done with lunch. You ready to do it? I'm like, yeah, no. Rose, I'm going to need you to sing the hook. Ethan, I got a great opportunity for you, buddy. So you were delegating.

That's exactly right. That's like, I'm not a businessman. I'm a businessman, right? Ethan, here's your star turn right here. Boom, all of a sudden, maybe you get our mystery cake next week. I don't know. All right. So if we're all being honest, did we think Jason was going to make something unspeakably lame?

And we didn't want our names attached to it. Can we be 100% honest? That I don't know. all I know is for me I was extremely busy I've never been busier actually busy he was literally sitting at the table out there Jason cool as hell man

Jason'd be making a lot of good stuff around here so I didn't assume it was lame it just wasn't my cup of tea I got it, Juju thank you for I think we have clarified all of this except for Trista bringing the dog to the company party Well I was just going to say

just a co-sign for Juju Do you remember when you probably don't but do you remember when Drake made views and it had It was this like flair of Caribbean and everybody was like, what is Drake doing? Dan, you remember that. I'm sure you remember. It was all the rage.

And everyone was like, wow, Drake's appropriating Caribbean music, which he has no connection to. Controller. Controller. By the way, we look very happily back on views. Very good album, by the way. It was. That's what Juju is trying to avoid. It's like, what does Juju have?

I know that his DoorDash name is Julio, but that's the only connection that he has to Latin culture. Stop snitching My bad Would you like my comment, Dan? Yes, please. The floor is yours, Tony. I'm sorry. In some ways, I'm sorry

that it has taken this long to actually give you the room to defend yourself against an assault of allegations that you... Like, Diego Pavia thinks your tweet was long, dude. He thinks that? Maybe he's part of this tweet.

All right. Nobody's bigger on Christmas than me, folks. Love the holidays. Love the reason for the season. Jesus Christ's tremendous. But fake news smear campaign for the Lebitart show. The biggest.

these low energy losers are running a witch hunt during the local hour saying I skipped their little holiday intro rap because I was scared of losing my cool card total disaster fake news sad let me even don't even get me started on Chris Cody fraud played both sides by the way as an aside he he was like you can't do this you can't do this he's like he told me personally he took me aside and literally grabbed my arm and said please don't do this I care about you don't do this you're lying oh now I'm lying Okay, fine. We'll keep going. Your honor. Look at all the snitches. That's not. I'm just, I'm just being truthful. Your honor, Zaz?

I mean, I'm being honest. Yeah, honesty is what we need. Thank you. Okay. I'll tell you the real story right now. My life is huge. Massive deals. Tremendous things happening.

Schedule more packed than ever. It could be, if I would have done it, I would have won the Golden Globe like Dan said. And that's it. They're jealous. Very jealous. Merry Christmas, any way to the haters and losers. So that was my comment. Christmas three emoji, three American flaggings.

Three American flaggings. of course, you know, three times for the champs. Chat GPT, please write me a tweet in the voice of DJT to respond to the DLS. That was all off the easy. No GPT needed. Well put. You were fired up. You were mad at us. I'm at my in-law's house and all of a sudden I see a thing says, happy holidays except for Tony. And I was like, oh, what does this have to do with me?

And then I listened to the local hour, completely bashing from everybody here. It's insane. And maybe I warrant it. I think it's a good song. and I think we should be proud to be a... It's not really easy to make music that's not corny and terrible in the sports sphere. Do you hear a lot of it?

Like, Yeti, how is he not invited to the party? Oh, and another thing. Another thing. Ron McGill's charity was supposed to get money from the High Lie thing and no one even invited Ron McGill to anything. He was supporting that Highlight team. How are you so careless, Chris Cody? Welcome to the season, Dan.

Yeah, the league moved on from Ron McGill. We didn't have any control over that. Didn't Ron leave a play. upset last night? It would be awkward to invite Ron. He's like the X. The league made us break up with Ron. That was not another. Yeah, you think we kicked Ron out? But Ron didn't know you guys had won the championship. It's a little awkward when he gets kicked out. Like, what are we going to be like, hey, Ron, come celebrate with us. You're not with us anymore, but like, it was awkward. He left last night pretty early and I was kind of surprised, but I thought he just had another, like,

event to go to. No, he told me I'm dead to him. His feelings are hurt. No, I know. I felt bad. I could have invited him, but the league moved on from him as our sponsor for their own reasons that we didn't have anything to do with. No one told me this. Well, we were not happy about it. And we're celebrating with our current sponsor. Yeah, that money could have went to Ron's

Foundation. Yeah. It wasn't our choice, clearly. Your championships sold charity money from Ron and the animals. That's fair. And no one invited him to the party. That I feel bad about. I couldn't have done anything about the sponsorship stuff, but Why was Yeti not invited to the party?

We will do next. It lives in Georgia. Yeti, I'm sorry that we did not invite you to the party. We have aired there. So does Juju. If only as someone who lived in Georgia were here. Holiday Basketball is here. And when stars like Kobe White,

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Void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. Four additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see DKNG.com slash audio. Limited time offer. Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right?

Don't place parlays on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is one when it hasn't hit, triple zero. Always drink your Yeagermeister ice cold. That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion. Everything else? Everything else. Wearing clean underwear every day.

Well, that's just a personal decision. Brushing your teeth. Obviously smart, but not a rule. Never pee-pee on an electric fence. Okay, maybe there are two rules. But the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Yeagermeister must be drank ice cold. Or don't drink it at all.

Damn, that's cold. Exactly. You're finally starting to get it. Drink responsibly. Yeagermeister liqueur 35% alcohol by volume imported by mass Yeagermeister U.S. White Plains, New York. Don Lebertard. Quiet man. Yes. You know, I'm married man.

I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line in back in my day. Stugats. I wish you were here, my wife. I really miss her. No, I don't. That's the thing about being married. You know, you're not allowed to say I don't miss my wife. I've been gone two days.

I haven't been gone long enough to miss my wife. I'm sorry. I call her. I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds. You know, what am I? Hello, all right. All right, we'll see you. All right.

And then, you know, I'm going to see her in two days. I was jumping, Charlie. Good. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. game, it's not appropriate to work. Put it on the pole at Lovit's our show. Is it appropriate to work somewhere for two days in a studio and then bring your dog to the holiday part? Service dog. Can I also put up, is it appropriate to send work tasks to your crew at 5 p.m. on company holiday day? I needed an open for the fake pregame show. Me and Jeremy are like,

this mother. Did Jeremy make one? Did you? He did. Let's see what he's got. It's the fake pregame show, and it's... It's good. Isn't it, Joe? Yeah. Mike Ryan's hurricanes are saying... I need your support. And they represent the ACC, not the...

Golden State. Gold, Georgia Tech yellow jacket. With... Malaki. ...leading the charge. It's the fake pregame. show and Merry Christmas. Oh, ho!

Mike Ryan will be screaming. No! And... Are you shitting me? If... Malaki doesn't come through, did you expect there to be different fake pregame show music? So did we!

Well, there's not, but we found this, and that's... It's good. Dan, do you like this? Is this good for you? How does it rub you? Well, Greg Cody says... Hello! Before we say goodbye, so watch my six.

Six, seven. Before, Malaki leads the canes to victory. It's the fake pregame show. And boom goes the dynamite. I've got an honest question about all of this, because I don't know what's right. You will help me understand what's right. I'm of the belief that we should, for example, be doing a live stream off of the M game tomorrow because it's a pretty important

game but we had a holiday party and people need time off for the holidays so you think it's wrong that I asked Jeremy and you to make some music before our last show? No I thought just the tie like I'm literally about to leave my house to head to the party and I get the text and so the work reflects that

if you hear the one that I did my dad's work parts I did that last night after the party so let's talk I have the raw footage of me like getting those clips from him Please, let's do this. Please let's do this because, because you guys have it right. There was no more impressive thing at this holiday party than the surgical way. And I'm telling you, there's a sniper there.

I learned last night that amongst us, somebody with our group is married to a sniper. An actual person, if you're a sniper once, you're always a sniper, correct? If you were in the United States military? Yeah, that doesn't go away. You can grow. You're, but there was a... More than a sniper. It's like riding a bike.

Once a sniper, put it on the poll. At Levittern Show, once a sniper, always a sniper. Nothing more impressive. And I'm talking to him about being a Navy SEAL and the height of the military surgical incisions on discipline. And what I'm seeing nearby is Greg Cody ordering beers in a way that's more Navy SEAL team than anything I've seen. He had people coming from every angle, including his wife and me.

He had a factory line of beer last night. The waitstaff was impressed. They were like, you have another one. It was such a sophisticated system. I talked about this with Chris's mom for a while. I was like, this is incredible how he's got this going. It's almost like a Rob Peter Pay Paul kind of situation. When I was ordering drinks last night, you know, one server would come up.

You know, hey, can I get you a drink? I said, of course, you know, makers double on the rocks. And then like two minutes later, another server comes up. Like, can I get you some of a drink? And my response was, he already took my order. Thank you. My dad in that spot every time, Miller Light. You ask him if you need a drink, Miller Light.

Anyone who comes up to him, can I get you a drink? He's just giving his drink water. And he has my mom going around multiple times. My mom comes up to me and she's like, I'm looking for the waiter. Your dad needs a beer. So it's like, it is like I'm telling you, impressive. And so after that, I needed some work parts. Because yesterday, before the party, I was able to throw my work parts together,

but I needed some fake pregame show, that type stuff. I had a drunk Greg Cody do it, and I have, here's the 45-second clip. So wait, this is you working in the middle of the night. No, no, this is me in an Uber last night, heading back to my house with my dad, where it's just me shoving a phone in front of his face and being like, Whisper, Fake Pre-game Show. All right, so Whisper Fake Pre-game Show. I don't know what you mean. Fake pre-game show.

I don't know what that means. Fake Pre-game show. Fake Pre-game show. Just you know. Do it. Fake pre-game show. Again. Fake pre-game show.

Biggest game in 20 years. Biggest game in 20 years. University of Miami. University of Miami. Texas A&M. Texas A&M. That kind of thing. That kind of thing.

That kind of thing. Just do again. Fake pregame show. Don't feel a little of God. Freak pregame show. Fake pregame show. Fake pregame show. Pregame it.

Pregame it. Pregame it. Pre-game in it. So I took that. I took those work parts. And I was able to make this. Wait, that's Jeremy. Spines right here.

And I was able to make this. Fake pre-game show. Head-to-head. Yeah. University of Miami. So did we. Texas A&M. No.

Biggest game of 20 years. Oh. Hello. Head-to-head is always. Always the number one criteria for anything. How does it rub you? Are you shitting me? Fake pregame show.

So did we. I need your support. Golden State. Gold, uh, Georgia Tech yellow jacket. No! Fake pregame show. Six, seven. No.

Pre-game in it. Head to head. So did we. University of Miami. Milwaukee. Biggest game in 20 years. Oh, ho. That kind of thing.

You know what? I'm sorry. Huh? He did the most you good. I'm not going to lie. I thought of this. I was like, should I do it on the way to the party?

I'm like, you know what? This will be funnier after the party. Well, he had such a hard time comprehending what you were, I don't understand. I don't know what that means. This came to hear, say it. All right, so whispered fake for you game show. I don't know what you mean.

pre-game shop I don't know what that means there's no meaning it's just it's just whisper it that's the thing and then my mom my mom shines in she just wants you know whisper it well it's like a child like a baby okay he's not it's not just that he's a baby just so that you understand the perspectives from which I see the Cody's Erlene Cody is a wildly impressive human being wearing a Rolex for 30 years service on her wrist because she runs a gangster law firm and she's wandering off to get that guy a beer that that guy like what she's she's so worried about no that that guy needs another beer as if he doesn't have seven people in now the sniper bringing in beers me too everybody's just funneling in

beers she's walking away mumbling i'm a serious person at work I'm an important person Why am I getting this fool His 12th beer When he's got three other people Bringing him 12 beers So they can make that magic Erlene definitely the biggest gangster

The party last night She was cool as hell Like we talked about 10 minutes Because a couple weeks ago Greg and Erlene came to Atlanta And so me and my girl took them out You feel mean We got way closer

So Erlene man She's so funny man Sluke to Erleynne She's all Awesome, so is White Tamara. Everything you just said about early, and I'm like, yeah, it's kind of like White Tamara. This is a compass, smart person, very charming. And I'm like, this guy, you got to dress him?

You got to dress him before you go out? My wife's a huge fan of Amin now. I think they're making plans. Like, my wife's a big immune guy now. Zazlo, can you please, as someone who's covered college football all season, Lucy Rodin, is going to, I think, she's going to be at Texas A&M. So is Ron McGill's kid who's enjoyed following them around. Let's break this down as quickly as we can through this prism, okay?

I believe this is the best team in the University of Miami has faced, and I think Marcel Reed is the most dangerous quarterback they've faced. I know C.J. Carr has been very good this year and doesn't turn the ball over, but C.J. Carr cannot run, did not run all season, and he was playing in his first game against Miami. So I think even though Kevin Jennings of SMU was very good, I think Marcel Reed at quarterback is the greatest threat they have. But Greg was telling everyone at the party, and I think he's got this right,

that Miami's advantages on both lines of scrimmages make it so that Miami is gone from a five and a half point dog to a two and a half point dog and is getting healthy and I believe can expose the SEC as a fraud from this perspective. Arkansas lost 10 games in a row. Arkansas put up 42 on Texas A&M. They didn't put up 42 on anybody else. When I saw Arkansas play Notre Dame, Notre Dame dragged Arkansas across the line of scrimmage. I think this SEC, these SEC teams, because they're playing against each other,

hasn't quite seen something like the Miami offensive line or the Miami defensive line, because you think of the SEC as George, Alabama, and Oklahoma. They're not what they were, none of them. Those are hugely flawed teams. Texas A&M hasn't beaten anybody in a conference that people think is good. I do think there's the chant. Miami drags them. No.

I mean, we just haven't talked about the most important element of this game. I know where this is going. I just feel like I really wanted to say something to Mike, but I know Mike has been here a long time. She went to Oregon.

You know where this is going. And probably would have slit my throat if I would have said this like right away two seconds in, proverbially. 2018 I don't think that's how you say Perper

No that was a bad That was bad That was matriculate level Also Dan I don't think that's how you say it either That was bad We're both having a bad Bad word day Oregon led Stanford

31 28 Under a minute left Holding the ball on the 43 yard line And instead of just kneeling down Mario Cristobal called for a handoff And instead Verdell fumbled

Stanford recovered, tied the game and won it in overtime. Mario Cristobal doesn't win the big games. And he never has. And it's always the result of something that he's done in error. And I think that will come to rear its ugly head, proverbially, tomorrow. I don't know about that, Trista. He played the biggest games this year outside of the SMU game and the Louisville game, obviously.

The big games on the schedule, Notre Dame, like, that was a win. They won that game convincingly that we always talk about it, but that first drive of the second half where they went for like... 16 plays, 9-minute drive where they ran the ball up the middle six times in a row. Like, that shows you how strong their offensive line is. I think they're just scoring on them. And then when you flip on the defensive side of the ball, like these guys talk shit about Ruben Bain, it's like, okay, one-on-one Ruben Bain,

don't send a tie-in to help. Don't send a back-to-chip. That guy is a menace, and he's going to wreck everything. thing they want to do. My only worry is that the Keynes, looking through their schedule, didn't really play a quarterback that was dual threat in the way that they have struggled with Haynes. Jennings

isn't this. And he's no, and he's not that whatsoever. Marcel Reed is the guy that can get outside and really create stuff with his feet. So it's a lot about the containment. Those edges, Mezzador, Bain, they're going to have to get around and then force him to get up the pocket, but the linebackers are going to have to keep an eye on Marcel Reed so it doesn't escape.

Do you agree as someone who's a college football expert. You have been saying the schedule of Texas A&M when you look at it, you're not going to see a whole lot of impressive things. Marcel Reed is averaging five yards of carry. He's their second leading rusher. They're receivers. They've got

three very good receivers. They can score on anybody. Not going to sit here and tell you, not worried. It's the biggest crowd that Keyneswell played in front of all season, like, by a wide margin, all right? And it's the best team they will have played. Yeah, yeah. And this Texas A&M team, one loss

in the SEC is super impressive, obviously. They've played all the bottom tiered SEC teams. They have no wins. They didn't play any of the top ones. The best SEC team they played is Texas, and Texas dominated them in the second app. I don't think Texas is that good. I think the canes are going to score on them tomorrow.

Keynes might take that ass. I got a canes. I got a cane by 12. Wow. Get them out of here. Trista's alone here. Everybody's out here now. We've swung wildly on this.

Homer's. I don't care. Okay. Indifference is a good way to end the segment before the biggest game in 20. years for you on football.